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Wednesday, November 29, 2017

Titles Live Here

      Hello friends and whatnot.  Here's a send-em-up--  After the Access Hollywood Tape last year, ladies should have taken to the streets and said Let My Pee-hole Go!  Pee-hole.  Instead of people.  Moses.  No?  Okay.  I'll spend the rest of the entry trying to make up for that.  Hey, got my guitar back yesterday!  Sounds great.  Still trying to figure the Whammy Bar out.  Also, playing the guitar.  Not that great at it.  I blame my height.  My whole body is more condensed and it's harder to play stuff.  That's my excuse.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Also, Lefty.  Everything is designed for righties.  My guitar was designed for lefties.  Yeah, but... shut up!
    2nd paragraph.  I guess.  I don't know.  Gotta do a draft of my The Station Agent paper for next Monday.  And, basically, that means I have to do the final paper for next Monday.  I ain't got the time to fine tune a draft.  Well, the draft doesn't have to be 5-7 pages.  I could have two pages done for Monday.  Then I'd still have to write the rest of the pages.  Hmm.  The point is Great What Else!  Watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button yesterday.  Gotta say, it was pretty curious.  Really makes ya think.  About age, and stuff.  What does it all mean.  Anyway, crap and crap.
    I don't know.  Still gotta order the guitar-to-usb and the mic-to-usb cables.  Then we're set for Music Making.  Alright!  Anyway.  Watched some more Documentry about a nonverbal autistic guy who became the first of his kind to attend college.  Kind of full of himself, though.  Pretty much said a line where he goes Let My Autistic People Go!  For real.  He was talking about Lincoln and he was like, It's up to me to free autistic people.  Where does he get off.  Oh, right.  Autistic.  Good Job Then, Buddy!  You're Doing Great.  Anyway.  What else. 
    Crap and crap.  Gotta figure out how to Solo.  I mostly just let my fingers do the talking.  Only problem is my fingers don't speak Guitar Language.  Pretty much illiterate.  But that don't mean they can't make some interesting shapes!  Probably.  What else is crap.  Well, they know how to do a straight line, and a curve.  Basically just keep repeating those.  Alright, I don't know.  Crap and crap.  Fourth paragraph.  This may be the last entry of November 2017.   Whatta month.  Who could forget what we were talking about four weeks ago.  Probably something terrible Trump did.  I can't remember it!  Mission Accomplished for him, I guess.
    Anyway, what the what.  I have a feeling there aren't many conspiracy theories at the government level that are true.  I feel like Trump would have Tweeted them out if that were the case.  So, I guess chalk that up to a good thing that happened because of Trump?  That doesn't sound right.  Oh well, live and learn.  When getting my guitar back, I played a little to see how it sounded.  Really impressed the guy who fixed it.  I played a C, then a D, then a G.  Guitar God!  Is it possible there's more than 12 notes, and we just decided to do it in a Base 12 thing for some reason?  Whose to say there aren't 24 notes, and we just count the notes halfway between notes.  Not me.  I'd never say something that I don't understand what I'm talking about in the first place.
    Wait.  Yes I would.  Anyway, crap and crap!  Sixth paragraph.  Whatta clunker.  Anyway.  Work on a song tonight.  With 8 track.  Sucks I have to hold the headphone cable in place and whatnot.  I'll hook it up to an amplifier instead.  Still have to hold it in place, but tends to work a little bit better.  Play this great solo I've been working on  In tablature, it's like 5-2, then the lower string, 5-2 again.  Doesn't matter which strings its on.  Sounds about as good either way.  So I got that going for me.  Laid down some classic chords.  We're talkin G D F G.  Never coulda dreamed such great chord progression.  God Down Fuck Gee.  Now I got context for lyrics!
What else is going on.  Got 7 Newports to last me the rest of the day.  Then new carton tomorrow.  Also, what else is going on?  The autistic kid had a piece of paper with 12 or so sections, and he points to the section for a standard thing to say.  I'm thirsty or something.  One of the things was, I forget how it was phrased, but basically, Compliment Me.  He points to that, his cousin or mom or whatever goes, Hey, you're doing a great job whatever it is that you're doing.  And all I have to say about that is God Damn This Kid Has Got It All Figured Out.  Anyway, crap and crap.  What else.  He's a good poet, too legitimate.  I mean, he's not gonna be a professional poet, but he's got a unique way with words.  So overall, I'm on board with this kid.  Just the part about being a Hero To All Autistics seems a little overboard.
    Everyone knows I'm The Real Hero.  To everybody.  Compliment me.  Hey this entry is going great.  You're doing great.  Want a drink of water?  I thought you'd never ask!  Jeez.  What the what.  Eighth paragraph.  If I ever figure out how to play guitar above Beginner Level, I'm gonna be a musical force to be reckoned with.  That's my takeaway from getting back Electric Guitar.  What else is crap.  As of now, I wanna use the Whammy Bar, I gotta stop playing notes completely.  So it doesn't work that great-- you need to be playing notes for it to have an effect.  So I got that working against me.  What else.  Two more papers to write!  Then Fuck You School, I'm on to bigger and better things!  Like playing four chords, and doing 5-2, and then a lower 5-2, in Tablature.  They should have a program when you hook up Guitar to Computer, that whatever you're playing, it records it in Guitar Tablature.  Technology has got to be there, right?
    I'm Full Of Great Ideas.  Like that one.  And the Compliment Me one that I didn't think of myself.  Anyway, what the what.  Ninth paragraph.  Seein' Psychiatrist Doctor tomorrow.  Nothin' notable about that probably.  Unless he teaches me how to play guitar in 20 minutes.  Then, I'm A Musical Force To Be Reckoned With!  Makin' Facebook Event for my upcoming show this weekend.  It's exciting!  Will more than 0 people declare they're coming?  It's definitely possible.  Then I'm Happy as a Clam.  Malcontent.  Palindromes.  Incomplete ones, at least.  That's my takeaway from things.  Anyway, what the what.  Also have 3/4ths of a pack of Camels to last me tonight.  So I'll be able to smoke something is the good news.
    Tenth paragraph?  Alright!  I like doin' stuff.  That's my takeaway from Life.  Drinking non-beer alcohol.  I believe it's called Vodka.  Don't quote me on that.  Can't think of a scenario where anyone would want to quote me on that.  What else.  Ordering Guitar and Mic USB Cables along with Secret Santa Gift today or tomorrow hopefully.  Everything's comin' up Michael.  Anyway, what the what.  QC still hasn't confirmed I'm graduating, but I was talking to someone else who is probably graduating, and they haven't confirmed her, either.  So that's a good sign.  Another good sign?  Study Abroad, Room 312.  One of the best ones of the month.  That was probably this month, right?  Coulda been October.
    Alright!  What else.  0,4,6,7,9,3,5, 2, 8... there's no 1 !  NO ONE!  HE DID IT!  Wait, already knew that.  Spoiler Alert.  In the sense that that just spoiled the entry.  No way.  Entry was spoiled ever since Let My Pee Hole Go!  Which was the first thing.  Title was the first thing.  Yeah, but it's a fine title.  I got no qualms with the title.  Anyway, jeez, lets get back on track.  Pretty sure Moore saying I didn't do anything with anyone without asking their mother turned out to be a great defense.  On one level, it's ridiculous.  Sounds funny.  People like funny.  On another level, makes him seem polite and gentlemanly.  Almost makes you forget the whole part about Raping Children.
    What else.  Gonna try to keep my guitar clean.  Put it away in Case every time.  Really do it this time, really try.  Why not.  Crap and crap.  12th paragraph.  I got that going for me.  Whats a good day to make Facebook Event.  First instinct is a Thursday Night.  People are ready for doing stuff on the weekend, gonna sound like a good idea to do something.  Even if its not this weekend that my show is, its all about setting a mood.  Friday, people are still in Thursday Mode compared to Sat or Sunday, but the weekend is upon them.  So narrowed it down to Thursday or Friday.  Hmm.  I've given me a lot to think about.  Also, Thursday is exactly four weeks before event.  That's a great amount of time.  It's roughly one month!
    Anyway, jeez.  13th paragraph.  Thinkin' Chinese Food for dinner.  Gotta be Thinkin' something.  Jeez.  Teacher cancelled what would have been the last class of the semester.  Still need to go in for AAL Class.  Which means no Mid-Day 1st-Part-of-Entry.  Whatta jip.  Only got one more of those.  That's been the glue that holds this semester together for me.  And I Love Glue.  Huh?  What else.  Just got the best score in Solitaire I've gotten since I started checking.  677.  Was able to do it all within the first round of checkin' cards at the top left.  Great, just great.  Now the high point of my day is over. 
    14th paragraph.  I don't know.  I got some paragraphs to go and whatnot.  That's for sure.  Wednesday Night.  Hmm.  Work on some guitar later tonight.  Really try, really do it this time.  Anyway.  I don't know.  Went back to listening to music last night before sleep, like a chump.  Music is too much stimulus.  All those different words and chord progressions.  And hearin' people solo, I can't do that.  Who wants to be reminded of their shortcomings.  It's not like autistic guys point to a piece of paper that says Remind Me Of My Shortcomings.  It's not like that one bit.  I guess 20 or 25 paragraphs is within my near future.  Also counting my near past. 
    15!  Sweet.  You know what?  Camels aren't so bad.  I feel like I could get back into Camels.  Then again, they're no Newports.  I've given myself a lot to think about. Hey, I actually have something to do after this!  Work on song.  That'll last a solid 10 minutes until I become dejected.  Anyway, in the mean time, what the what.  You know what?  Gonna make Facebook Event now.  Can't wait to see if someone says the Might Go!!!  Alright, first things first, make a picture for the event.  See if there's any good ClipArts.  Clip Art is taking a long time to load.  I'll get back to it in a bit.  In the meantime, let's entry it up!  15th paragraph still.
    But not anymore!  Anyway.  Work on Facebook Event after Trying And Failing to set down the foundation of a song.  That way I'll be in Music Mind Mode and the Event will be better.  That's my working theory.  What else.  Write 20 paragraphs here.  Then dunzo.  I found out one place that we get Food Deliveries from, you can just buy Matzoh Balls without the soup.  So that's exciting.  2 hot dogs, two matzoh balls.  That's more than enough for a full and well balanced dinner.  That's my take away from things.  Anyway, what the what. I had Matzoh Ball without soup two days ago.  It was everything I hoped it would be.  A real slam dunk.
    Anyway.  I don't know.  17th paragraph.  Whatta clunker.  Jeez.  I would be very happi with a B for the Bleak House Paper.  Satisfied with a B-.  Can tolerate C or C+.  Anything else is beyond the range of emotions that I can anticipate.  Below C, I'd be upset to a point I might cut myself.  Over a B, might be excited to a point that I might cut someone else inadvertently by having giving myself the reward of Playing With Scissors.  So the point is this is a paragraph.  I didn't even use the word Anachronisms once in my paper.  That's not a good omen.  Didn't even talk about the guy named Nemo.  Point is Great What Else And Crap.
    I don't know.  Three paragraphs to go.  Why not.  This round of music'll be different because I'm back to Michael Kornblum instead of The Uppers.  Unless I give myself a new hidden name for context.  And never share it with others.  How devilishly fiendish.  Alright, happy with Devilishly Fiendish?  No.  No Way.  Devil's not involved in this round of music at all!  I can pre-confirm that as of now.  Jeez.  Order food when this entry is done.  Wait for food.  Eat food.  Guitar!  I set 'em up, I knock 'em down.  The Bowling Pins Of Life.  Set em up knock em down is a bowling reference, right?  Gotta be a reference to some sort of sport.
    Okay.  Wonderful.  Down to three more Newports after the one I'm smoking right now is done.  Oh well, live and learn.  I think the best part of playing guitar yesterday was that, for once, it was actually tuned.  Never heard such great tones in all my life.  Oh well, back to being slightly detuned by now.  Whatta jip.  Crap and crap.  One and a half paragraphs to go.  I can do that for some reason.  Send my Facebook Event to the Sidewalk Coffee Page so all my friends and admirers there will see it.  That's the way to go.  You know what?  Last entry I went way overboard.  I'm gonna end this one at 19.  See ya later.

-7:31 P.M. 


Monday, November 27, 2017

This Is Gonna Sound Stupid, or:  One Title At A Time!

      Hey!  Whassup party people.  Extended Talk about Mental Illness in Disability Class.  I realized I have some mental illness where I capitalize words that don't need it.  Anyway.  We're on the verge of electing a senator who is a known child molestor.  That seems vaguely important for some reason.  Lady just came up to me handing me a laminated flyer asking me to donate to something.  I handed it back.  That's like donating a dollar or two to the cause, right?  Laminating must be expensive.  Also gave her more time to solicit donations from other people.  Now we're talking Hero Status.
    Had to take off my glasses for ten minutes while talking about mental illness.  We all know I'm sick while I'm wearing glasses, but no one ever said I'm not mentally healthy without wearing my glasses.  That makes a ton of sense.  Pretty sure something I said gave a clue to Professor about my mental health not being optimum.  Oh well, she'd have to find out sooner or later if we're ever gonna be Best Friends.  What else.  Wrote my paper on Bleak House.  Wrote about this one character who is a grown man who acts like a child.  Remind you of anyone?  Me.  I'm the guy it's reminiscent of.  And critics see him in a negative light.  Oh well, there goes my life.  That's not fair.  I'm responsible to a degree.  And do spend time on things potentially productive.  Like this crap, and crap music.
    Was thinking about how I would describe what I'm doing right now if a classmate saw me.  Well, I have a website, which is kind of a journal, but mostly just stupid jokes.  And I'm writing an entry.  That settles that!  What the what.  May walk a few blocks out of my way on Way Home to get McDonalds.  I highly covet their Happy Meals, boy.  Not eating lunch/early dinner today.  Just don't feel like it.  Anyway.  I'm done doing readings for my two classes.  The End is in sight and I can't motivate myself to do more than the bare necessities.  Hey, got a call from Sam Ash my guitar is ready!  Pick it up this week or next.  Buy a guitar cable that connects to computer with USB magic.  Work on songs with Computer Program from now on.  Also need a cable with USB for my microphone.
    Future is rapidly becoming the present.  Or vice versa.  Either way, Whats Gonna Happen I Don't Know.  Fun, fun stuff.  Fourth Paragraph.  Won't be able to participate in Academic Discussion tonight as much as usual on account of not doing the reading.  Great, just great.  I don't know.  Signed up for Secret Santa among family members in my generation for Upcoming Christmas.  Got a real solid gift idea.  Totally worthwhile and practical.  I've said too much.  Fine, I'll just tell you.  It's a book of 1000 practical jokes and it quotes a critic under the title which says, "Totally Worthwhile!"  There goes the surprise.  They're not reading this.  Wonderful.  Show is in four weeks.  Make a Facebook Event this weekend I guess.  Wonderful.
    Fifth Paragraph.  We're on the verge of electing a senator who is a confirmed Child Predator.  By which I mean he pre-dates children.  Which can mean a lot of things.  But it definitely doesn't mean he's an adolescent Predator From Sci-Fi Movies.  But, yeah.  Seems vaguely important for some reason.  Thanksgiving Occurred.  We played half a game of Scrabble and there were some real solid words out there on the board.  Words you could really sink your teeth into.  What the what.  Figure my Bleak House Paper is in the B-/B range, but I'd be fine with a C+.  I guess a C is possible.  The point is I'm pretty sure I graduate in three weeks.  And you all doubted me.
Sixth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Been writing some potential song titles which will be downgraded to potential fragments of lyrics.  I took a test online where they showed facial expressions and you have to guess what they're conveying.  I did terribly.  I blame a lack of experience of looking at people's faces.  Particularly when they're being photographed overacting.  You'd think if they're overacting, it'd be easier.  And you'd think wrong.  You'd be scoring terribly on thinking things which I just wrote and I forget what we're talking about.  Oh.  They're pretty good impressions.
    Seventh Paragraph already.  I should point out its very likely Alabama is about to consciously give a plurality of their vote to elect a member to represent them in the United States Senate who is inarguably a sex offender who preys on young children.  Republican Defense-- "They're not young children, they're pretty old for children."  It seems pretty notable that's the way an entire political party feels collectively at this point in time.  So, what else is going on and whatnot.  Gonna take a cigarette break.  BRB.  Alright, I'm back.  I'm sitting at a different table now.  Gotta mix things up to keep things interesting, right?
    The point is we have a President campaigning through the internet for an indisputable pedophile-in-action.  Seems fairly significant on some demoralizing level.  Eighth paragraph.  What the what.  Trump things CNN is representing our country to the world poorly.  Probably on account of mentioning that he's the president and reporting the things he do.  Does?  Do.  I'm sticking with do.  That'll show 'em.  Two more AAL classes.  Four more Disability Classes.  One 5 page paper, one 18 page paper.  Then, 80% chance I graduate.  Seems about right.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Sit here another 20-30 minutes.  I can tolerate that.
    Ninth paragraph.  Bleak House paper is about a guy who talks a lot of bullshit meant to come off as smart and enlightened.  My paper is a lot of bullshit meant to come off smart and enlightened.  Seems about right.  I don't know.  Buy a bottle of alcohol on the way home.  Parents are just gonna have to deal with it!  On account of me technically being an adult and whatnot.  More or less.  Talking about how exactly Lady Dedlock died.  It was ambiguous, and apparently not for any real and literal reason, and I go, "This is pretty stupid, but I would guess she metaphorically died by being locked out of something."  Good Point, teacher says.  She's on board with reading into names and titles.  Real good Best Friend material.  Wha the wha.
    Tenth paragraph. [Maybe she was just humoring me on account of my glasses-aided impression of mental illness.  dang it i hate it when that happens!]  I feel like Conan is back on the air this week.  Really rounds out my Monday Nights well.  Makes the whole thing worthwhile.  There's a good music mixing software I can get for free for 60 days.  Seems on par or even better than what my 8-track could handle.  And probably an easier interface to spend more time and effort fine-tuning.  Fine, I'll tune!  Are you happy now?  Ten to twenty more minutes.  And I'm already at the tenth paragraph.  I don't believe it.  Yet the facts seem to back it up.
    11th Paragraph.  America is on board with electing a repeated extreme-staturtory rapist.  Well, there goes that.  No need to get worked up over something you can't control.  But, he-- children-- rape-- people still like him?!  And want him to be one of the top 200 most influential politicians in the country!  Well, there goes that.  Still no one sharing the billing for my show.  Alright!  The more time the better is how I feel.  These are the real issues.  Someone tried to get the Washington Post to report Moore raped her and they didn't report it because they didn't believe it and it was gonna be a scam.  The point is I'm Great At Anticipation. 
    12th Paragraph.   Probably the last one.  Until later tonight.  I don't believe it.  Let's see, what else do I got in the tank.  I'm pretty good at strategically removing my glasses for semi-extended periods of time for strategy.  Need I say more?  That's not good grammar.  Probably not, at least.  That's how I feel.  May be too lazy to go to McDonalds.  But I need to get something.  And that's something I can put in my bookbag instead of carrying it in my hands on the way home.  Like a chump.  Alright, I'll be back later.
    Hey, it's later!  And I'm back!  Can't believe I made that prediction.  Guess I'm a genius.  So, what the what, how's it going.  Did get McDonalds.  Didn't eat it yet.  Did get alcohol.  Started a can of beer but not the hard stuff.  Typed up this bullshit for some reason.  My back hurts for leaning over my keyboard for a semi-extended period of time.  That's life I guess.  13th paragraph overall, 25 is well within sight.  The point is Great.  McDonalds was a bit more out of the way than I anticipated.  But one thing I do anticipate about Moore is that he is a bad guy in the past and present.  Huh?  Remember, I'm the guy who can't tell the difference between Pain and Flirtatious when looking at someone's face.  I don't know what I'm talking about, either.
    14th paragraph!  What's the point of taking personality tests if they're just gonna tell me I'm bad at personality. No point, that's what.  Got some Chicken Nuggies.  Got a McDooblay.  French Frizzles.  The point is all my hard work is paying off in spades.  When ordering McDonalds, I wanted to qualify me being there.  I don't wanna be seen as a guy who eats McDonalds.  Start with I don't usually do this... but can I have some french frizzles?  Anyway, crap and crap.  Apparently statistics show Jones ahead of Moore, but who knows.  I just hope it turns off whatever relatively sane Republicans were left that they're completely fine being the party of pedophiles.  Probably'll turn off 2 or 3 hundred people nationally, right?  Every vote counts! 
    What else.  I liked Al Franken's comments today.  He said something like,  I can't think of anything to say to repair your image of me...
or can I?  did I just do it?  No?  I'll try again tomorrow. Wonderful.  15th paragraph.  I'll repeat a joke I made on Twitter phrases a little bit better-- Trump Doesn't Want to "Make America Great Again"... he wants to be on a #Magazine.  Not 100% behind repeating that joke, but love that I got to use a new color.  Anyway, is it weird that two days after Trump throws a tantrum about not being Man of the Year that the Koch Brothers bought the magazine?  Seems like they did it out of spite.  I'm not 100% sure what Spite is, but I know it's bad.  Did the Koch brothers make their fortune from Cocaine, or Coca-Cola.  Hmm.  Maybe both.  Really got the market cornered with that.
    16th paragraph!  Amazing.  I'm havin' fun writing this.  A lot better than doing nothing.  Lately doing nothin' is gettin' worse, because each day I'm confronted with the ever-growing feeling of Not Knowing What I'm Gonna Do Next after this semester.  Not a fan!  It could end up being bad, I don't know.  I need structure, too.  It's been a long time since I didn't have any structure at all.  Scary to think of my mind potentially de-evolving.  Scaredom, indeed!  What else.  One more episode of Curb My Enthusiasm.  The last episode had what I was pretty sure was a dream-sequence but seems to represent it as if it really happened.  Now I Don't Know What To Think!  Hah, colors.  And it's hard to see compared to the background.  You just got practical joked.  If I ever think up a joke that leads to me getting a job in comedy, that's a practical joke if I've ever saw one.  I'm lovin' it.  In private.  The way God intended.  Whatta day, I'm tellin ya.  Classes, entries, glasses, pleasantries.  There were no pleasantries.  Ah, there probably were and I just didn't notice them.  Like teacher saying Good Point! when she really meant This guy is crazy and is gonna cut me if I don't give him good feedback!
That was a long paragraph.  Let's talk about it.  Anyway, I don't know.  I got confused because of the light blue text.  Made me think a new paragraph had started.  Probably spend 20 or 30 minutes on Paper tomorrow.  At the last I need to make the bibliography.  And at the most Improve Paper.  Probably manifesting itself as add one more paragraph of crap.  Good.  Great!  Wonderful.  Anyway, what paragraph we at.  17.  Cool beans.  I feel like working on songs at computer will definitely encourage me to spend more time fine-tuning them.  Def for sure.  Got McDonalds to look forward to after this.  Everything's comin' up Michael!  The point is  Jeez can we please elect Doug Jones?  I mean, give me that one thing.
Anyway.  Anticipated dirty tricks with trying to corrupt the Washington Post.  The Washington Post is incorruptible!  Thanks for trying, though.  Just makes 'em look that much better.  Unless it was a double corrupt-em-up.  Democrats posed as Republicans posing as Rape Victims.  You want another Anticipation-- Some Conservative Talk Radio Hosts Will Say That.  And that's a Crazysheet Guarantee!  What else.  I don't know.  SNL back this weekend!  Incorruptible!  What else is going on.  I'd like to think I'm incorruptible.  But the truth is you could corrupt me very easily. Depending on how beneficial it would be to me to become corrupted.  Just being honest and everything.
    19th paragraph!  I don't believe it!  Man, I'm havin' a blast.  Totally Doin Something That I've Convinced Myself Is Productive.  And fun!  Wow.  Not sure how best to heat up McDougals.  Microwave, obviously.  Do I attempt to remove Hamburger Fixins' from Bun?  I don't know if that'll fly.  Point is Great.  Half of the Moore Frustration is that He's A Pedophile and half of it is Facts Have No Bearing Anymore.  But we see evidence in that in everything these days.  But this is a glaring example and whatnot.  #Politic'dIt.  Crap and crap, what else.  I oscillate between ordering hamburgers normally served with cheese between take everything off including the cheese or take everyting off, you can include the cheese.  Now we're talking major oscillation.  Which is a word I picked up somewhere.  Wanna say either Science or Math.
    It's probably only shoddy Free Internet IQ Tests, but I'm kind of under whelmed by the math questions in Free Internet IQ Tests.  1, 3, 5, 7, 9.  What's next.  Get out of here with that bullshit.  Everyone knows what's next.  Anyway, what else is going on.  20th paragraph.  And I'm not just trying to sound smart.  I Am Smart.  Really evens out my shortness.  Lots of Standards Deviating when thinking about Smarts and Height.  But it evens out in the end is the point.  I'd give 20 points in IQ for 2 or 3 inches of height.  Well, I don't know.  Then again, I'd give 2 or 3 inches in height for 20 points in IQ.  Cause then I'm an unfathomable genius.  A regular Robert Reich, I'd be!  Talk about living the dream.
    21st paragraph.
  25.  30.  Something else.  Who knows!  Not me, and I'm the smartest guy here!  Anyway, crap and crap.  But that's the thing.  The only thing I'm smart in is yeah they're obviously all consecutive odd numbers.  Beyond that, not that smart, I gotta say!  Point is Crap and Crap.  Point is Great.  Ah, multiple points.  Some points I can really sink my teeth into.  I don't know.  Used some nice words in Academic Discussions.  Correlations in Disability Class.  Anachronisms in AAL Class.  Now we're talking a guy with a potential 105 IQ.  Point is lets get back on track.  I don't know.  Whatta do when the entry is done.  Then I'm back to dreading the unknown future in my life.  I don't wanna dread stuff!
    22nd paragraph, tho.  Hmm.  I check my Facebook Activity Log a dozen times a day to make sure I didn't accidentally Like someone's post or something.  And gave them the impression I'm all up in their business.  So far, hasn't happened.  But it can strike at any moment!  Scary stuff, is the point.  Apparently that one prince guy got married to a lady who wasn't a princess until now.  And she wasn't part of his family or something so it's a big deal.  This is the stuff that we should be focusing on is the point.  Gettin' better at Solitaire.  Like I said last time, still lose more of the time than statically I should be.  But winnin' when I win Quicker!  I take them Fake IQ Tests pretty quickly, too.  What letter is next-- A,B,C, D...  I don't know.  I'm sure you can develop some sort of algorithm where any of the 26 letters are next.  That's the real mark of someone smart.  Find someone who says G but then has to prove it.
    I couldn't do that.  I'm not familiar enough with the letter G. Would have to spend some time studying it, what makes it tick, that sort of stuff.  23rd paragraph.  Alright, I got stuff to do after this entry that'll take up some time.  There's Conan.  There's another Late Night Comedy Send-Em-Up or two if the mood calls for it.  There's McDougaleses.  Always the potential of drinking more, too.  Anyway.  I've gotten in the habit of spending 2 hours before I sleep listening to music.  Gotta get out of the habit!  I'd be happier without the extra stimuli before my slumber.  That's my hypothesis.  Point is Great.  Anyway, crap and crap.
    Jeez, 24th paragraph.  I wish this entry would never end.  At least, not for another couple of weeks.  That's the concurrent thing, along with dreading not knowing what to do after this semester, is dreading what I know I have to do to finish this semester.  Five page paper and 18 page paper.  It's' not too bad, but having to do something is Hanging Over My Head!  And also the stress of not knowing whether I graduate or not.  Doesn't really add anything to the equation, but incorporates a certain level of uneasiness that I could do without.  Point is Great.  Six paragraphs to go most likely.  Watched Blood Work yesterday.  Half way through, Jeff Daniels says his last name is Noone, and I immediately go, Well, he did it.  You don't give someone the last name Noone without them being guilty of the crime.  Anyone with a knowledge of consecutive odd numbers can figure that one out.
    25th paragraph.  Spoiler Alert.  What's the past tense of Alert.  Get Robert Reich on the phone.  There was no cigarette break this AAL Class.  Just let us out early.  I have a fantasy where I use the bathroom long enough that I exit the building same time as Professor, and he goes, C'mon man, have a cigarette with me even though class is over.  Then we recite consecutive odd numbers and he and I become Best Friends.  Gotta fantasize about something.  Anyway.  Real, real bad at knowing what an over-exaggerated face is portraying.  They give you four options to choose.  Sadness, Embarrassment, Happiness, Love, for example.  I got 9 out of 20.  And I got lucky on the 9, I'm gonna be honest.  I wonder how much hate mail they get from people going How Dare You Say I Can't Read Obvious Emotions!  I'm gonna.. umm, hmm.  What was I talking about?!
    I don't know.  I just don't know.  I wanna design an IQ Test to be taken by Donald Trump.  First and only question is-- What Letter Comes Next-- T, R, U, M.... and he goes It's P! and he's happy for the rest of the month.  I wanna spread happiness is the point.  That's my goal in life.  Moore or less.  Can't have that guy being happy.  Parents gonna find out in 3 or 4 weeks I bought a new bottle of alcohol.  We'll cross that bridge when it comes.  Anyway, I pick up my guitar this week or next, that helps ease me into the Post-Graduation period of my life.  Start workin' on a new album while this class is still going on.  Transitions, all about transitions.  I guess.
    27th paragraph.  I can keep writing indefinitely.  This entry may last the rest of my life if I really wanna make a point about it.  Probably not.  But can't count out anything at this point.  I wanna make a point about something.  Sounds fun.  Is the point.  Jeez.  Crap and crap.  Usually get 2 double-sized cans of beer on Monday nights, drink one while writing entry, save 2nd for the next day.  I'm drinkin' both tonight!  Starting the second one right now, as things turn out.  Gotta mix it up, that's the point of life.  And the point of downloading that program for a free 60 days.  Mix up some music. 
    Jeez!  On the one hand, I don't wanna stop writing entry.  On the other hand, this is bullshit.  I've given me a lot to think about.  Started flippin' through Bob Dylan Autobiography I got 2 years ago.  Reading a few random pages at a time.  The way Bob Dylan intended, one would imagine.  He never explicitly said it, but I think we could infer he meant us to read it in a nonlinear fashion.  Seems like somethin' he'd be into.  What else.  In the very small sample size I've read, every few sentences tend to slant-rhyme with each other.  Genius at work.  Wonder what he would say after A, B, C, D... Probably G.  Geniuses pick G.  That's been my experience.
    29th paragraph.  Watched the movie where Robert De Niro plays an adequate comedian.  Pretty good movie.  I enjoyed it and it was pleasant.  Also watched the movie where Kong: Skull Island happened.  Pretty good movie, too.  John C. Reilly's character is a hoot!  No, scratch that.  A Hoot and a Half!  Anyway, what the what.  Conan starts soon but I will withhold from watching it for a while.  For Strategy reasons.  Maximizing Pleasantness Of Tonight For Me strategy.  Conan is probably smarter than me.  He spoke at my high school graduation and, in retrospect, reading his speech, I think he played up our intelligence in relation to his a bit.  Made it sound like we were smarter than him, and we all ate it up.  He's probably smarter than 90% of us.  I feel comfortable making that prediction.  What's the past tense of prediction.  Oh.  Alert.
30th paragraph.  I don't wanna end it now.  Okay, 35 paragraphs.  But no more than that.  That's too much as it is.  What else is going on.  Eat some crap.  Finish beer.  Watch Late Night Comedy Send-Em-Ups.  Avoid listening to music.  Unless a new Eminem song "Dropped."  Then, who can resist!  I don't know.  Six paragraphs.  I like the sound of that.  A lot of paragraphs but reasonable.  Hopin' Doug Jones wins in a couple of weeks.  It'll be like, that's the absolute bare minimum of the amount of decency our society should have.  And I'll be like Alright!  We made the bare minimum!  And wouldn't that be wonderful.  You know, that sort of crap.
    31st paragraph.  Small but possible chance I get guitar tomorrow.  Sounds fun.  Download that program, I could be workin' on songs as soon as tomorrow afternoon!  I got some great lyric fragments, believe you me.  You know, like three word phrases, and stuff?  Really knocked those selections of three words out of the park.  Anyway.  I don't know.  Crap and crap.  Conan started on the TV!  And I paused it.  For Strategy!  Sometimes I think about the sorry state of affairs that people can watch whichever TV whenever they want.  Instead of when it aired, like God intended.  Anyway, I don't know. 
    Oh, 32nd paragraph.  How about that and whatnot.  I don't know what I'm doing wrong in Solitaire.  You're suposed to win 80-90% of the time.  I win maybe 50%.  And that's not counting the Redos I do for the initial dealing.  I see a bad original set of cards, fuck this, I'm starting over.  And even with that, finishing maybe 50% to completion.  Pretty sure that qualifies you for a below 100 IQ.  It should, at least.  Better than this consecutive odd number nonsense, is how I feel.  What else.  Running out of cigarettes.  That should take 10 points off your IQ.  Smokin' cigarettes.  Lots of things should do things.  That's my take away on things. 
    Oh no.  Only three more paragraphs.  I will re-calibrate at 35.  Maybe go for 40 because I'm retarded.  Hopefully not, I can say that safely.  No good for you, no good for me.  It's a matter of will power.  Bleak House is about a disputed will.  Rejected title was Will Power.  That should have been a rejected joke.  Very, very rare I reject a joke.  I can't say it never happened, probably happened once or twice.  But, sure, what else is going on.  It's interesting that someone who rapes girls is very likely to be elected to the senate. We're not even talking about a senator who it turns out raped adolescent girls.  We're talking about a guy, never held the office before, in the running, and 40-50% of people going, he represents my values.
Jeez.  I don't know.  And, yeah, it's partly people going, Yeah, I don't want to believe that, so I'm just gonna pretend its not true based on me not wanting to believe it.  Anyway, I don't know.  What can I do.  Probably nothing.  That's my takeaway.  What else.  What paragraph is this.  34th.  Okay.  Alright.  Sure.  I found out, I think, I forget, but I think I found out you can easily get your music on Spotify or iTunes without it really being a thing.  So I lost respect I had for people I've met who have that.  I feel lied to and betrayed.  And I also feel how do I finagle that sort of thing with my music.  Probably would reject me anyway.  They'd go, Yeah, sure, it's easy, but this crap?  Get real.
How dare them.  Each song has got guitar tracks and vocals and everything.  Real Music.  In the first 10 minutes of class, AAL Professor goes, You guys like music?  And I go Yup.  And that was the end of that discussion.  Was kind of hoping it led to something.  Ideally, in a very perfect world, me going, Yeah I do music no big deal it's kind of a big deal.  But, nope.  Ya'll listen to music?  Some people nod their heads.  Well, let's get on with the book.  How dare them.  35th paragraph.  I don't know, crap and crap.  Five more after this.  Then I'm cuttin' myself off.
    36th.  Crap and crap.  I don't know.  Alright, end is in sight.  There's no debate about it.  I cut myself off at 40.  So, what else is going on, in the mean time?  I hear ya'll been reading paragraphs.  Hope they've been pleasant and all.  What else.  Alright, I'm startin' to get behind the idea of stopping.  I got stuff on the horizon for when its over.  What else. 40 is a good number.  Very underrated.  No one talks about 40 but it's u there with the greats.  What about This Is 40.  Yeah, fine, if you wanna count that as talking about it.  It's the title to a major motion picture, can't be any more talked up.  Yeah, but that was a spin-off of another movie.  Doesn't count.
    Huh?  Good thing I'm stopping soon.  That's what I got to say about that.  There's a good chance the last 20 paragraphs have been completely unintelligible.  No one's arguing that.  But I had fun, right?  So it was worth it?  Sure.  There's an argument to be made for that.  Three paragraphs and change to go.  Fine!  I'll stop writing soon!  Will that make you happy?!  Probably.  Wow.  I don't know anymore.  I get too eat crap soon is the point.  That'll learn 'em.  I don't know.  Along with not listening to music as much, I also gotta wean myself off Twitter.  Joy Reid may be a Joy To Read, but isolating myself from the news and politics will make me happier.
    38th paragraph.  Alright!  Ok, starting to accept the inevitable fact that this will end.  Sweet.  Three Ta Go!  Wonderful.  Apparently Trump is starting to deny the Access Hollywood Tapes.  The things he already apologized for.  What dose that mean.  That he truly no longer believes they were real-- even though he accepted they were real a year ago?  Or that he feels, Yeah, now anything bad happens, I just say it's not real, even if I already confirmed they were real, that seems to be working pretty well.  I try to imagine a future in a year or two where we're collectively back on board with facts.  It'll take some back pedaling from conservatives, but I think it's a possibility.  That's a country I'd be proud to live in.
    Two paragraphs to go!
  That's an entry I'd be proud to live in.  What else.  I like Chicken McNuggets.  They're like Chicken Nuggets but they do some magic on 'em and make em' McStephenDouglasenized.  That sort of crap.  ALright, I'm okay with ending after the next paragraph.  Life is full of compromises.  That's what I've been led to believe.  Stephen Douglas was The Great Compromiser.  I think.  Sounds right, at least.  No it doesn't.  Oh well, live and learn, you take what you could get, such is living, doing things for strategy.  Crap and crap.  I could always end the entry at 40 paragraphs... and immediately start writing the next one.  But that would be crazy.  And I'm not crazy!
    Last paragraph.  Whew.  Whatta grind.  My bandcamp page got three listens coinciding with 2 visits from the Sidewalk Coffee Calendar.  Two skips and a partial.  Alright!  One partial listen!  That means they listened to more than 10% of it.  Talk about holding someone's attention seriously.  Great.  These songs are two minutes long.  Let's do some math.  Make one extra paragraph to accommodate for it.  120 seconds.  10%.  12 seconds.  More than 12 seconds.  If it was exactly 2 minutes.  Check out that Math Brain of mine!  And I tricked myself into letting myself write another paragraph!
    Okay, here it is.  41, whoever heard of 41 anything.  What about Sum 41.  What about them, I don't know them too well!  As long as it's not 42.  Gets all the good press as a great number because of that book.  42, who needs it.  Not me.  What else.  I already started this second can of beer so I guess I'm pot committed to finishing it tonight.  Such is life.  One things for sure, can't listen to Sum 41 tonight.  I've sworn off music completely!  Hmm.  That kind of bullshit makes me want to write a 42nd paragraph.  But then That Stupid Book Wins!  I can't be having books win. 
    Oh well, live and learn.  This Is It.  Fairly confident about that.  I never read Hitchhikers, or Catch 22.  Both books which feature 2 digit numbers prominently.  Anyway, jeez.  Whatta clunker probably.  I had fun writing it, but I'm An Idiot.  Can't forget about that fact.  Watch Conan after this.  Eat probably right after Conan.  Figure somethin' else out.  Someone liked my Twitter Post from this weekend.  Looks like someone's movin' up in the world!  Sweet.  You know what?  Gonna go for 45 paragraphs.  That's a great number.  1945.  When WWII ended.  Alright, we're back into the shit!!!
Three to go.  That's it!  Gotta be.  I would be certifiably crazy if I went over 45 paragraphs.  Might as well lock me up and throw away the key.  Just like they did to Lady Dedlock.  The picture shows her wrapped around a cemetery fence in her death pose in the book.  The gate was locked.  Looks like I'm a genius!  Anyway, what else.  Figured out the girl named Charley is a representation of him.  Another character named Richard, could be a reference to his name being Dick-ens.  I got all these names figured out.  Character I wrote about, Harold Skimpole.  Well,Well, Harold's my Dad's name, so I figured that part out... Skim Milk.  Not all the fat in milk, but still some.  Pole.  He's a polarizing figure.
Figured that book out.  Two paragraphs to go!  Then I'm cuttin' myself off.  If I write a 46th paragraph, I will say right now, I will cause bodily harm to myself.  I need to make it real this time around.  Someone in disability class was talking about how when she was in high school all the cool kids were cutting themselves.  Don't know what to make of that.  Seems like the non-cool kids should be doing it.  What do cool kids have to be upset about.  Jeez, bodily harm.  That doesn't sound good.  Better end it after next paragraph.  What else.  45 paragraphs is fine.  1945.  That's when the Cold War started.  Probably.  They don't have history on IQ tests so there's no motivation to learn it.  Conan O Brian would know.
    But what wouldn't he know.  Anyway, what else.  Hey, it's the last paragraph.  I'm actually fairly confident this will be the last paragraph.  I got that going for me.  Jeez, this entry shows how little self control I have.  Oh well, gotta have some negative characteristics.  That's part of life and whatnot.  Anyway.  I can start a new entry tomorrow!  Probably not, though.  Maybe Wednesday.  That's my best guess.  What else.  Oh Shit.  I have three minutes until it's 12!  Then it's a different day.  Okay gotta end it hmm what else and crap.  This paragraph is technically long enough but lets see what I can add within two minutes.  Bullshit and crap I like writing stuff it makes me feel good.  Playing play money poker while this is going on smoking a cigarette drinking beer ITS STILL 11:57 and I don't ca-- WAIT ITS 11:58 NOW.  Alright.  I think that's it.  I'll see ya later.

-11:58 P.M.

Wednesday, November 22, 2017

I Ain't Titlin'  Nothin'

      Did I use that title over the last few weeks?  Possibly!  Whatta great title though, can we all agree on that.  I think we can.  I agree on it, and there's no one else here.  Therefore we 100% agree on it.  The point is Great!  Had a dream that I missed some deadlines for this Fall Semester so I had to retake some classes.  Woke up with the knowledge I Got Plenty Of Time To Do It!  That'll show my dreams.  How dare them.  Finished Bleak House.  Don't really understand why it was a surprise ending.  Without giving anything away, nothing happened.  Oh well, live and learn.
    2nd paragraph.  Thanksgivening is tomorrow.  I can't wait!  I'm gonna eat food and feel vaguely thankful about things in theory.  Anyway.  Dunno what to do for Future Next Bottle Of Alcohol.  The last one lasting a month is a Hard Sell to my parents.   And I got no cash on hand.  I'll figure something out, believe you me.  I mean, hey, you!... believe me.  That's how words work.  I was watching The Shining last night which was pretty scary.  Then I changed the channel to Stephen Colbert which was even scarier.  #Topics!  Not because Colbert is scary.  But because of Current Events And Whatnot.
    Anyway, what the what.  How scary is The Shining really Danny's got an imaginary friend how charming.  Anyway, what the what.  Never understood why Tony lived in Danny's mouth.  Of all the places an imaginary friend can live, if you even picture him living anywhere, why your mouth?  Doesn't add up.  Anyway, what the what.  Real respectful guy, that Tony.  It's always Mrs. Torrence this, Mrs. Torrence that.  He's got Charm and manners!  The blood getting off the elevator never scared me.  I've seen blood before, my body is 90% blood!  Get a new gag.  I don't know, what the what.  A lot has been said about how the kid who planed Danny didn't know it was a horror movie.  I wonder if he's ever figured it out.  I'd like to imagine him as a 49 year old still not knowing.  I'd like to imagine a lot of things.
Jeez, what the what!  Still no money on poker, but the good news is I'm getting better at Solitaire.  Still winning around the same %, but quicker.  Sweet!  Giving a little bit of thought to buying a new 8 Track Recorder.  The one I have is fine except for one thing, where the Audio Out input is messed up, so if I wanna plug in earphones, or hook it up to an amplifier, I have to insert the cable ever so delicately and hold it there in place indefinitely.  It's a small thing, but it makes the entire process that much more clunkier.  I don't know if it's worth 300 dollars to buy a whole new thing, though.
    Well, I do know.  It's not.  That settles that.  Crap and crap, what else!  Tomorrow is 6 weeks since I brought in guitar to get fixed.  I'm starting to think the guy ran off with my guitar.  Quit his job, left his family, cause he came into possession with my dirty guitar.  Start life anew somewhere else.  Seems logical to me.  Fifth paragraph.  Cool!  I don't know.  Watched Hustle & Flow yesterday.  What sparked my new interest in 8 Tracks.  Anyway, what the what?  I wonder what places will do if when I order food delivered, and the Tip and the Total don't match.  Do they just pick whichever one is best for them?  I demand answers right now!
    Sixth paragraph.  Cool.  Bleak House paper this weekend.  The Station Agent the next weekend.  Then two weeks to write African American Literature paper.  Got it all planned out.  Then, who can say for sure.  Not me!  I'm starting to understand the Net Neutrality issue.  It's important because of things.  They can charge more for going to competitor's websites.  And make your internet connection worse.  That sort of crap.  But even worse.  What else is crap.  The night I'm booked for my show still doesn't have anyone else booked.  The point is I'm preparing to do 3 hours.  Alright!  Made a tentative set list last night or the night before.  Pretty much aiming for a 50% amount of songs I didn't do last time.  And it's all in better order.
Live and learn.  Hey, I actually lived and learned!  It's about time.  Seventh paragraph.  Whattado for the rest of the night.  Watched some Forgetting Sarah Marshall last night.  Horrifying.  That's my takeaway from things.  Only the 7th paragraph?  That's no good.  I got at least 9 to go.  Oh well, live and learn.  Well, four paragraphs to go, possibly, I guess, commas.  I think The Shining is a Thanksgiving Movie because of all that food he ate while locked in the kitchen stock room.  That's my theory.  I don't know.  Whattado.  Hey, hmm.  Let's see.  Erm.  I guess I could watch the later viewing of Maid In Manhattan.  I saw 10 minutes in the middle where they talk about Jennifer Lopez sitting on someone's face.  That's a plot development I can get behind!
    Sure.  Puns, whatever, I'll take it.  Cause the guy's face was on a magazine, she sat on the magazine.  Get your head out of the gutter.  Eighth paragraph.  Three to go!  I don't believe it.  Lots of people being accused of sexual harassment.  I think the entire Media Industry should do a Shuffle Up And Deal, and get new people into every position.  Can't be worse than what's currently in place.  Just hit Shuffle on everything.  That's my hot take.  And that's how I ended up being an executive producer on Meet The Press.  All my dreams have come true! 
    2 to go!  Whatta joy.  I could get away with not reading anything more for this semester, that being 2 and a half books for AAL.  We'll see if I read 'em anyway.  As of now, it's about a 50/50 shot.  Ah, the Golden Ratio.  1:1.  Sounds golden to me, what else.  What else is going on in My Life.  In my life, I loved you more.  That's a given.  If you loved me so much, why isn't it In Your Life.  "Your" being me.  Seems like it's still about you and not me.  I'm gonna write a letter to Michael Jackson because he owns The Beatles or something.  Even in death.  Shouldn't 10% of the Beatles Songs have gone to the government when Michael Jackson died?  We still have the estate tax the last time I checked.  Probably Woulda taken the song Taxman, that's a given. 
    Any other jokes I could make on that.  Probably.  What else is going on for this paragraph.  Money (That's What I Want).  Close enough.  I don't know.  If I just said Money without the (That's What I Want) you wouldn't have known what I was talking about.  Now we're on the same page and whatnot.  Wow, almost done.  10 paragraphs is a lot.  I don't know.  Wow, I can stop it at any time I want.  But I want a few more sentences.  Enjoy your Thanksgivenings, everyone.  Who knows where we'll be for next one.  2018, the future.  And the end of 2018, at that!  I can't even imagine.  See ya later.

-9:37 P.M.


Monday, November 20, 2017

Titles Can't Save You Now!

      Oh no!  I was counting on titles to save me.  If not now, then at some point in the future.  Anyway, Monday Night.  Wrote six or seven paragraphs during Class Break but decided to just scrap them.  It was a real drudge.  Wait, I mean sledge.  And by sledge I really mean sludge.  Let's settle on Sledge.  Was a real sledge.  Drudge is a portmanteau of Doctor and Fudge.  Cracked that code.  Anyway, what the what.  Basic Facts Of Life that I mentioned during Lunch Paragraphs will be repeated here, to a greater effect!  1)  Have idea for AAL Paper.  2)... Wait hold on.  Let me think for a god dam second.  THe paper is about how the writers of whatever books I use from AAL Class, well, I forget.  It's good though, don't doubt that.
    Huh?  This is the better version of how this entry might play out?  Get Off My Back About It!  The point is I got three essays to write over the next 4 weeks and I know what I'm writing about for all of them.  Except one.  But that one doesn't count.  Let Me Think For a God Dam Second C'mon!  The End is in sight is the point.  Assuming I do graduate.  Sent an e-mail to Advising Center hopefully to verify that.  Then, after these papers, smooth sailing.  on The Ocean To Nowhere.  Oceans don't really go places.  They separate places.  It's not rivers we're talking about here or anything.  What about Ocean Currents.  Hmm.  Sounds like I just got my idea for my 3rd paper!  Ocean Currents in Bleak House.
    Alright!  What else.  Had Halal Food for lunch/early dinner.  That settles that.  Went to Podcast on Friday.  It was alright.  I liked the part where I Was Doin' Somethin.  I wish I was always doin' something.  Well, not always.  Maybe like 50-60% of the time, I wish I was doin' something.  That's the golden ratio if I ever heard one.  I wonder what the golden ratio really is.  Do Unto Others, that's it, right?  I typed in Golden Ratio into Google and it shot back 1.618...  That doesn't help me at all.  What's so great about that number.  I think the golden ratio is the amount of women you could sexually harass until it becomes likely it will come back to haunt you in an alternate future reality where people seem to vaguely care about that kind of thing.
  Fourth paragraph.  Thankgivings coming up.  When they first started celebrating Thanksgiving, did they make any effort to invite our American Indian Friends to re-live it.  After the first one, they were like, Oh Man, We Gotta Do That Shit Again.  Same time next year?  But then they couldn't send them any reminders through the mail because American Indians don't believe in the postal service.  So they got left out of the tradition.  Or maybe the colonists didn't want them in the first place.  They taught us how to Maize and then the next year the American Indians showed up to party and the colonists were like, It's Cool, We Got This.  And the American Indian cried in a fashion similar to that anti-trash commercial.
    Huh?  The point is Great.  I'm reading a book about slavery where the Underground Railroad was a real Underground Railroad.  And I was like, Hmm, that seems pretty crazy, kind of hard to get involved in this book, too absurd.  But then I was like, which is crazier, that we could have invented and built underground railroads in the 19th century, or that for centuries and centuries we kept millions and millions of people in human bondage under the worst conditions possible.  Message!  Anyway, what the what.  Fifth paragraph.  I don't know.  Too bad American Indians can't appreciate that message.  Don't believe in the postal service.
I don't, either.  Can you believe they didn't even write Such Great Heights?  It's a cover!  I feel taken advantage of.  What else.  The point if I had Halal Food for lunch/early dinner and have left over Duck & Stuffing & Yam for second dinner/fourthmeal.  I pretty much blew my load on thanksgiving except with duck instead of turkey.  It's ok.  I can get whatever I want for Thanksgiving!  Pretty sure eating non-Thanksgiving food on Thanksgiving is the main thing 'value voters' are against.  They want a candidate to make sure we eat the right stuff on certain holidays.  Otherwise, The Jews Win.  Jews, terrorists.  Same difference.  Hah.  I got to say fourthmeal.
What paragraph we at.  Seventh.  Not a lot to do these days other than tangibly count down until I have all the work done for College and all the time done for College.  And then, presumably, pick up my fixed electric guitar, play four discordant chords, and Call It A Life?  It's good to have stuff to look forward to.  I like eating Duck because 90% of the time it's like eating poultry and 10% of the time it's just I'm gonna chew on a huge wad of fat!  And you can't argue with that golden ratio.  I heard Trump was into Golden Ratio's.  Not really.  I read it.  Totally different sense.
    Eighth paragraph!  Cool.  I saw another example of systemic racism taking the other LIRR branch to and from Brooklyn the other day.  Trains are worse, slower, dirtier, the stations are built less solidly.  I'm onto their tricksies.  Anyway, what the what.  Thanksgiving, eh?  What else.  Maybe aim for 15 paragraphs.  Ten would be easier.  20 would be sexier.  15 really has nothing going for it.  But that's how you get a good compromise.  I read that somewhere.  A good compromise is when no one's happy.  So, basically, say you've got a family.  Your son wants to go to KFC.  Your daughter wants Taco Bell.  Your wife wants Chipotle.  You want Boston Market.  Good compromise?  Set the car on fire and go to sleep in a gazebo.  No one's happy there, therefore, good compromise.  Not such a great compromise for The Gazebo.  Or The Car, for that matter.  Well, you didn't say they were players.  I blame you for all of this. 
    Ninth paragraph.  Or, just keep creating portmanteaus.  You combine both ideals into a word, that's a compromise right there!  You want KFC and I want Boston Market?  Fine!  Let's Just Get JFSmarket.  ...Apparently, in that portmanteau, I confused JFK with KFC.  There is the knock-off of KFC called Kennedy Fried Chicken.  So there is some precident for there being confusion there.  A real Portman Two, that was.  Because What Else Is Going On.  I don't know.  Yeah, anyway.  I was thinking about the Beasite Boys illustrious career, as one does, and it gave me some good context thinking baout myself as a potential writer/muisician/comedier/artist.  They essentially successfully stayed young men through their art into their 50's, I'd say.  I don't know how old they are now (and one's dead), but you tell me, The Beastie Boys are 51, just put out a new album, I'd be like, Ah, I can't wait for that youth-infused music!  So, I realized, in 2040, I'll be 51.  So I got the rest of the 10's, the 20's, the 30's, to do comedy/music/art/writing, and be young man doing it!  That's a lot of time to knock some crap out of the park.
    So I got that to look forward to.  And maybe by 2050, 60 will be the new 50.  Anyway.  In the 1970's, No was the new Yes.  Old yes.  I don't know how time works.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Is it possible they're just gonna start hiring women less because they don't want to tempt their fragile, fragile powerful men with committing sexual assault?  My guess?  I don't know.  I hope not.  It would be a net negative for us as a peoples.  Anyway, I don't know.  Alright.  One 5-7 page paper on The Station Agent and Dwarfism.  Easy.  One 18-25 page paper on looking at "Post-Racial" texts in how they assume authority and what purpose they use it for.  Medium.  One 5-7 page paper on Bleak House in some respect.  Gonna be easy once I know what.
Then GRADUATE.  I'll get all sort of Congraduations from all sorts of people.  Then, who knows.  I'm gonna guess either attempting to do music or writing comedy for as long as possible until I force myself to get a job.  Point is huh?  What paragraph we at.  11.  I think part of the reason I think 51 is young is I've been living with my parents too long.  Another reason is that my best friends are 51 year old comedians and talk show hosts.  Kind of a one sided best friendmenships there.  Oh well, you take what you can get at this age.  I don't know.  11?  I can aim for 20.  That sounds good.  And this is going, if I may say, a solid C-/C.  Whereas the 6 paragraphs I wrote during Lunch Break was a very generous D/D+.
    Anyway, I do not know.  Will be celebrating Thanksgiving to some extent.  Have some sort of dinner with my immediate family.  That's fun.  I like doin' stuff.  And that surely counts as a Something Did.  Anyway.  Still not 100% sure I graduate after this semester, but I did send an inquiry, so I will be finding out either way at least.  I don't know.  I may not be able to do the 1 open mic I thought I'd be able to do a week before my show.  That's when AAL Paper is due.  But I could presumably finish it several days early and hand it in earlier.  Presumably.  I don't know, crap and crap.
    13th paragraph.  Cool!  That's how time works.  My favorite writers, musicians, and comedians are now in their 50's.  And that's not old age.  It's middle aged!  And being middle aged is young!  So we all got that collectively going for us.  The point is I'm trying to intellectually compensate for having lost my entire 20's to this mental illness equivalent of a pesky STD.  I don't know if that makes sense.  I've got a mental illness, what do I care?!  Probably one of the main benefits.  You don't have to make sense out of things, not your problem anymore.  I don't know, crap and crap.  13th paragraph still.  That's great and whatnot.  I don't know. 
    14th paragraph now.  The 13th paragraph can Go To Hell!  20 seems logical and within reach and whatnot.  Whattado with the rest of night.  Eat some crap at some point.  Get started on my six day weekend.  That sort of crap.  20 well within reach.  Just six and a half paragraphs to go!  My brother told me during my show, there was a guy who appeared to work there who was listening attentively.  All goes to back up my working theory that people there respect me to an intriguing degree.  I don't believe it!  Yeah, that's probably the main thing in the back of my mind of what to do after Graduate. Resume doing open mics and start working on new music.  Not sure how reasonable it is, but that's how it's looking right now.
    15th paragraph.  I don't know if its because they've been tracking my search engine inquiries or what, but I've been getting Ads on Facebook from Columbia for MFA programs I might be interested in.  One day it was a Non-Fiction MFA, another one it was a Poetry MFA, today it was a Screenwriting/Directing MFA.  So the point is I'm a pretty lazy guy, think I'll go to Columbia for an MFA Program.  I don't have that kind of cheese.  I don't know, what else.  No smoking break tonight with Professor.  Just as well.  We'll have to find new best friends next semester anyway.  Better we ease into it gradually, both of us.  Or ease out of it.  Either way, it's easy.
    Five paragraphs to go most likely!  Cool!  Aiming to finish one of my Disabilities Papers, while starting one of the other ones, for this Thanksgiving Break.  That's my aim and whatnot.  Five paragraphs.  Hmm.  I don't know.  The question is now, what do I do for the rest of the week beyond eating, spending a few hours on homework, and maybe writing two or three more entries.  No money on poker.  Not a lot of TV goin' on.  No electric guitar.  Just me and my lonesome.  Hmm.  I'll figure something out.  I could listen to music, but can't overdo it.  You listen to too much music, then where does that get you?  Absolutely nowhere, that's how I feel.
    Fourth paragraph.  I mean, four more paragraphs.  Maybe put money on poker, I don't know.  Makes a fair amount of sense.  But I need to learn how to live without playing poker in the background eventually.  Might as well learn now.  Tried a new brand of beer on Friday I had never had.  Allagash White.  I wouldn't lie to you-- not to your face.  I liked going to Brooklyn.  It was like, it's been a minute since I've been here.  It's been a minute?  Am I saying that right?  The point is Great, whattado when this is over. 
    18th paragraph.  Jeez.  Nothin' to do.  Whatta jip.  Here I've been doing stuff and now I'm faced with the lack of opportunity to do stuff.  How ironic.  I think I rushed to judgment too quickly on Al Franken, but then I un-rushed to judgment by rushing back to unrush the rushed judgment.  I saw the clip of their little skit and it was pretty innocuous.  But then I also saw someone else accused him of something since then.  So the point is maybe I just shouldn't judge.  Or, maybe it just doesn't matter.  Both make strong and compelling cases.
    2 paragraphs to go.  Whatta world.  Probably some sort of TV I could figure out to watch.  Like seasons I haven't been keeping up with.  Simpsons, The Mick, White Famous.  New Rap Game this week or next, too.  I don't believe it.  I have to write a supermarket list for tomorrow.  So I got that going for me.  I felt like having popcorn a few nights ago but we didn't have any.  Gotta rectify that for Future Situations.  So that's something to keep in mind.  Only one more paragraph after this one.  Better make this one count, then.  So, Have You Heard The News that Mike Pence is Vice President?  Get  load of this guy!  Whatta square.  Seems like a deviant if you ask me.
    Still waiting for #LetsPromoteMikePence to trend.  Oh, wait.  It's #Let'sPromoteMikePence.  That explains why I haven't seen it.  Glad we got that out of the way.  So what else is going on and crap.  If the spectrum of humanity didn't exist beyond Old White Men, Joe Biden and Mike Pence would be on opposite ends of the spectrum.  But, with the correct view of the spectrum of humanity, they're pretty similar.  They're Old White Men.  But if all you knew was Old White Men, you could see how they might appear polar opposites.  The point is Great I Finished This Entry.  I'll see ya later.

-10:38 P.M.


Wednesday, November 15, 2017

Titles!  Half Off!

      Whatta discount!  Anyway, crap.  Wednesday class is over.  You know what that means.  Pretty self explanatory.  The point is let's hope this entry writes itself.  I got no patience for doing things without them doing themselves!  None!  Podcast Friday Night.  Friday Night Podcast.  Pretty good name for a podcast.  I'll suggest it to them in their Q and A session.  Never too late to improve upon your title.  I had an idea for a podcast called This Second? but I forget why it was a potentially good and appropriate title to a podcast.  Oh, it was supposed to be a radio show, too.  Which comes on at the same time every week.  And you gotta listen to it that second.  That's how Radio Works.
    Back-up title was, "Radio Works."  Anyway, what else is going on.  What the what and such.  Got Chicken Pot Pie for dinner later.  It's Pie + Meat.  Can't argue with that equation.  The point is Great.  Whatta do for the weekend.  See if I can get Advisement through e-mail to find out if I can graduate.  E-mail AAL Professor idea for Paper.  FFigure out idea for paper.  That should probably come first.  I got a rough idea, formulating and such even as we speak.  Gotta do some preliminary preparations for Disabilities Paper.  The point is great what else.  Gotta get to at least 10 paragraphs.  That's the aim at this point.  Then, by the time I'm at 10 paragraphs, I'll be in a groove and keep going.  That's my hypothesis.
    Somethin' about how in the modern era, musicians are still exploited financially probably and in terms of their art possibly.  Gotta fashion their persona and music to be financially lucrative and such.  I don't know any of this crap, I'd have to do some research.  I guess.  The point is Great, what else is going on and crap.  I had a dream a couple of nights ago that I understood the space-time continuum.  I was like oh this makes sense.  Don't 100% remember, though.  Such is life.  Part of it was like, we have a bunch of atoms in the universe, what if each atom was one possibility of how time plays out. 
    Anyway, crap and crap.  Fourth paragraph.  Without biological life, is all of physics just one way it can go?  Isn't their like fluctuations on levels below atoms that are random?  I don't know.  Gonna make my first podcast guest a theoretical physicist.  Then make fart noises while he's talking.  That's the logical way to take my life.  Anyway, today is 11/15.  Exactly one month after the 10/15-- the date that makes time travel possible.  That was October 21st.  Pretty close!  It's safe to assume the date that set everything into motion on October 21st being The Day in every Back II The Future was October 21st.  Six days before, makes sense to me.  Six dimensions.  That settles that.  Now they say there's 11 dimensions.  Yeah, but that's stupid.  There's only six dimensions.  Anyone with half a brain could figure that out.
    The point is Great.  What is it, fifth paragraph?  I can dig it.  I gotta do it this second?  There, now we're talking.  I second that!  Anyway, crap and crap.  And I can start off each show with playing one of my songs.  Because my constant ulterior motive in life is tricking people into listening to my music.  Anyway, what the what.  Can we just ask Moore on the record is it true you were banned from a mall?  Cause that's a pretty straightforward way to determine he's full of shit.  And the mall would want to back up their story, probably.  One third through Fall, which is the third season of the year.  That's Oct 21 in a nutshell.  Really makes ya think.  Maybe the movie opened on Oct 21 1985.  That's a possibility.  Really make em feel like they're in the movie.
    Sixth paragraph.  I don't want to believe that time is a dimension.  It makes me feel stupid that I don't understand it and makes my life feel stupid that in a sense it's already happened.  Not a fan.  Crap and crap.  What else is going on.  Apparently two stars collided a few months ago which made people understand physics.  Beyonce and Jay Z got together years ago, why didn't they understand it then?  Cause they're stars.  And they collided once or twice if you know what I mean.  Heeey.  What else is going on.  Do you know what I mean?  I was talking about sex.  Ask your parents about it.
Okay.  That's one way to write a paragraph.  Why do we sometimes use the phrase Super Star to talk about people.  What exactly is a super star.  Pretty sure that's not a thing in astro-physics.  Is it just because of alliteration?  E-mail me your answers at email@superstar.net.  Anyway, crap and crap.  We should celebrate Thanksgiving by showing up at American Indian Reservations and demanding they make us food.  Sorry.  Wasn't my best joke-em-up.  Probably in the bottom 10,15% of all the joke-em-ups in my lifetime.  Oh well, live and learn.  Seventh paragraph.  Cool!
    Eighth paragraph.  Even cooler!  What's this obsession with coolness, is there some sort of climate change in the future?  Yes!  You figured it out!  Pretty sure they knew about climate change in 1985.  Maybe not the public, but scientists and whatnot.  I took a class about it and everything.  Crap and crap, what else is going on.  I remember in third grade I had a portable fan I took to school with me and portably cooled myself whenever I felt like it.  Probably.  I don't know.  I don't get why, when my dad heats up chicken pot pie, he only needs to put it in the oven for 40 minutes, and when I do it, I need an hour and a half.  And presumably it's at roughly the same cookedness.  Must be doin' something wrong.  Oh, yeah, that's right.  I don't understand how time works.
Damnit!  Anyway, crap and crap.  Emimem's new CD "drops" on Friday.  Oh boy.  This is my most anticipated album release since a few weeks ago!  Anyway, playing one of them good freerolls in poker that pop up about once a week.  Maybe even win me some 40 cents.  Then, double up every day, I'll be a trillionare in a couple of months.  It's about time.  I think to become a trillionare I'd have to literally bust every other person on this poker playing website.  Seems like a logical outcome.  Bustin' makes me feel good.  What else is going on.  I wonder who the world's first trillionare will be.  I've narrowed it down to probably not me.  I'd like to be, sure.  But odds are narrowly against it.
    10th paragraph!  Hey, I am in a groove!  I knew it!  Had to bend the nature of time to figure it out, but oh well!  Just lost most of my money in Freeroll.  Wait, scratch that.  I still want to learn Freecell.  There, there we go.  But I did lose most of my money in Freeroll.  That settles that!  What else is crap!  I remember in the 90's watching TV while my Mom would play Freecell and being like whatta chump.  Freecell isn't that great.  Still don't know how to play it, though.  Probably some Freudian stuff going on with Freecell in my life, that's my guess.  Watched a Woody Allen movie last night I had never seen.  Jason Biggsby Smalls and Christina "My Last Name Is" Ricci.  It was fine.  I got no complaints.
    Except for how Woody Allen is a sexual predator most likely.  Are we still talking about sexual predators?  That was so last week.  That's my take on current events.  Sorry.  What else is going on.  11th paragraph.  I don't believe it!  I should have started my testosterone therapy five weeks ago but my endocrinologist has gone MIA.  That's right, she released the song Paper Planes.  That was a good song of the times.  That's my take on things.  What else is crap.  That's right, she collaborated with Ted Leo to be the subject matter of a song.  What else is going on.
    12th paragraph.  I got that going for me.  Chance The Rapper hosting SNL this week.  Seems like a cool dude.  He's no Community Chest The Rapper, but still good.  Lost in Freeroll.  That'll show me.  What did I do to deserve this.  Oh you'll find out.  Crap!  In the meantime, what else is going on.  Sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if I got back into Rap.  Probably Very Different, is my guess.  At some point, it's gonna happen.  Sooner or later.  In the meantime, though, let's listen to Weezer.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I have a few theories of what Weezer could mean.  We Easyer.  Like they do hard rock bordering on metal, but easier to listen to for the layman.  Wee Easyer.  They urinate easier than other people.  Maybe a male/female thing.  Wheezer.  This is the correct thing according to my research-- he wheezed as a child and they called him this.  That's all I got off the top of my head, but I'm pretty sure I've thought of even more alternatives.
    13th paragraph.  I got that going for me.  What does Eminem mean?  1)his initials are M M.  That's really more of an M and M, not an m in M.  Like, for me the first letter of my name is M, and the last letter of my last name is M.  That's more of an M in M.  2) Candy.  3)not sure.  I'd speculate about Chance the Rapper, but I have no context.  Get back to me when I'm into rap again.  So I got that going on.  What else.  I think there should be more rap with rock music in the background.  That's my hot take on things.  Just lost in a worse freeroll.  Time to learn freecell.  Gotta do somethin', right?  Probably.
    14th paragraph.  There's one Freeroll every few days where the prize is literally nothing.  When you lose the freeroll, you have the option of paying 50 cents to re-buy into it. And the entire prize is made up of the money people paid to stay in.  So, for some reason, there's usually 2 or 3 dollars that are spread amongst the top 9 finishers.  Why do people pay money to stay in it?  Because they're very, very stupid.  So I got that going on?  What else.  Semester End is creeping up.  And it's potentially College End.  Oh boy.  Whattado, whattado.  I almost got hit by a car on Monday.  I wasn't really paying attention crossing the street around Queens College, and, well, yeah.  But I'm still alive!  I got that going for me.
    But then there's the alternate reality where I kept walking an extra second and am now Dead.  So I got that going for me?  Crap and crap.  And then there's that alternate reality where Woodsy Allen decided not to make a movie with Jason Biggs and Christina Ricci.  A world I don't want to live in!  Crap and crap, 15th paragraph.  I wrote an entry after all.  Good stuff.  And I still got more to go!  Now we're talking Great Night.  Anyway, jeez.  I can't remember if I poured alcohol into this soda.  Huge predicament.  I pour more, too much alchol.  I don't pour more, I'm drinking regular soda like a chump.  Only logical thing to do is pour it down the drain and start from scratch.  I think I'll just drink it the way it is now.  Probably Chump-Like, but that's how I feel.
    16th paragraph.  Jeez.  I can't even decide whether it tastes like alcohol or not.  It tastes a little bit like alcohol, but it also tastes a lot like no alcohol.  Whatta jip.  Crap and crap.  The point is I need to stay more focused in life, particularly on orange-soda related incidents.  What else is going on.  Someone asked me for change today and I was like I don't have any which is true, and they believed me.  They were like, Thank you anyway, God bless you.  I guess I just got one of those faces that's not only believable, but also says to its beholder, I Got No Change.  So I got that going for me I guess.
    17th paragraph.  Senate might be 51-49 in a month.  That would be good because of my sense of politics.  Jones is supposed to be relatively conservative, though, but still exponentially better than a republican.  Also, pretty sure voters will get confused, because Moore and Jones, I feel, are pretty similar names.  Both pretty popular last names, both 5 letters, O is the second letter in each name, there's an E in there for both.  That's my Hot Take On Politics.  There should be a movement that wants to elect both of them called Jonesing for Moore!  Because that's something that might happen in whatever alternate reality we're going towards as of this moment.  I also feel kind of guilty that alternate realities are popping up every second of my life because of whatever chance is dictating this version of my future.  I wanna be like, don't trouble yourself, universe, don't mind me.
But I can't.  Universe listens to nobody.  Let's pretend time isn't a dimension.  Then we all go home happy.  What else is going on.  Maybe it isn't, people have been wrong before.  That's my hot take.  Crap and crap.  18th paragraph.  I don't know.  I may not have been drinking the last 10 minutes, like a chump.  That's life, I guess.  What else.  I've had several Michael Myers dreams the last few months.  Which is weird because I'm not particularly a fan of those movies or very much knowledgable about them.  The dream last night, and may be a constant remember correctly, is this guy is gonna kill me over and over again, not much I can do.  Yeah, that's another thing.  I get killed once, respawn, get killed again, respawn... and I think last night I decided to just sacrifice myself to try to help others live.  Cause I knew he was just gonna keep killing me either way.
    Yeesh.  19th paragraph.  Go for 25, maybe even 30.  My Hot Take.  Lean Pocket.  Pretty sure Lean Pockets are just Hot Pockets with less filler.  Cracked that code.  Anway.  If I were a lady I'd call my lady parts my Hot Pocket.  That's my hot take on things.  Just poured some Snapple and definitely added alcohol.  Back on track with life!  It's about time.  Whattado when I graduate.  I got a show booked for two weeks after that.  Thats pretty good.  Probably have Electric Guitar Fixed.  Then start writing rap songs with rock music in the background.  Only logical way for my life to continue.  My Hot Take.
    20th paragraph!  I don't believe it!  A filter broke off from one of my cigarettes while it was in the pack and now I'm smoking that cigarette.  Ahh, now that's fresh even-more-carcinogens!  It's about time.  Anyway, what the what.  Crap and crap.  There better be a Woodsy Allen movie on tonight that I haven't seen, or there'll be hell to pay!  Anyway, jeez.  AAL Professor put his hand on my shoulder during Monday's Class and it made me feel uncomfortable.  Logically, it wasn't inappropriate in any way, but I guess I'm not comfortable with people touching me in any way.  Oh well, that's life I guess.
    Possibly 10 paragraphs to go?  We'll see!  Five, at least.  Possibly more likely, too.  We'll see.  Gotta get back on track.  Make this part of the entry really worthwhile and crap.  Hmm.  What can I really do when I graduate.  I've narrowed it down to don't continue taking undergraduate classes.  So that's good.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I don't know.  I don't even know what I'm gonna do for the next four hours, let alone when I graduate.  So that settles that and whatnot.  Woody Allen has gotten pretty passive-aggressive with his titles.  Anything Else.  Whatever Works.  These are two examples.
    Crap and crap, 22nd paragraph!  Four to go at least.  Probably that's it.  Already hit a wall this last paragraph or two.  The point is Let's Get Back On Track.  I got some Life in store for after this entry.  Gotta imagine there'll be some TV.  Reading MSNBC Personalities on Twitter.  Chicken Pot Pie.  Maybe even More Drinking if I play my cards right.  So there's stuff to look forward to after this ends, is the point.  Anyway.  I just looked at myself in the mirror and I have to shave.  You know, so there's less facial hair on my face than there is right now?  I can't be explaining everything to you.
    23rd paragraph!  I don't believe it!  I'm just gonna end it after this paragraph.  That means One More Paragraph.  Explain'd It.  Crap and crap.  That means I'll be ready to watch TV for the 8:00 timeslot.  I'll be ready before then, but that's the timeslot where things start that I'll be able to watch in completion.  So, great, whatever.  I saw The Rap Game is coming back soon.  It isn't a game.  It's the rap game.  That's what commercials have told me.  But this time around, I know Jermaine Dupri is short.  So that adds some excitement to the whole thing.  Might as well go for 25 paragraphs.
2 to go.  The Rap Game contestants have to be getting progressively worse, right?  Presumably these are kids who didn't make the cut the first 3 times around.  So, great, what else is going on.  Gotta spend each paragraph as if its the last paragraph.  That's philosophy on how to live each paragraph.  Anyway, what else.  I don't care about time.  I'm gonna live my life, 4th dimensions be damned.  That's my Hot Take on things.  What else.  Finish this paragraph soon, then one more paragraph, then Watch Some Great 8:00 PM TV.  Sounds good to me and whatnot.  Real good use of time. 
    25.  Bam.  Well, not bam yet.  Still only the beginning of 25.  So, great, what else.  Got 18 minutes until 8.  Figure this'll take anywhere from 4 minutes to more minutes than 18.  Haven't put Food in Oven yet.  Not really hungry as of now.  I had a Wake Up Wrap before class from D & D.  Which I believe is a Dungeons and Dragons reference.  There's no "And" in Dunkin Donuts.  Touche.  What else.  Hey, I Got Somethin' To Do on Friday!  That's good.  Also, start practicing for next Music Show.  It's in six weeks and a day, but I feel like I could stomach starting to practice around the next few days.  Sweet.  Paragraph is already long enough to end.  Still 14 minutes until 8.  Gonna go for 26!
    Why?  Because I Have Problems!  This is it.  What else.  I thought about checking out what's playing at 8, but I don't wanna ruin the surprise.  My guess is settling for some lifetime or such show.  One of them channels that's in the hundreds for me.  That sort of crap.  I wonder if Interventions make people do drugs more.  Cause they wanna get on TV.  My guess is Probably Not But They Should Still Do Some Scientific Studies On Just To Confirm.  What else.  Pretty much done.  So that's pretty good.  26 more paragraphs than I had 2 and a half hours ago.  Not bad.  I'll see ya later!

-7:49 P.M.


Monday, November 13, 2017

Make Titles Make Titles Titles, or:  Titlin' Makes Me Feel Good!

      Hey!  Someone read me my weekly horoscope, about how I got lots and lots going on, and I got to focus on one thing.  Which I interpreted to mean Crazysheet.  Class was runner up, but that's five hours a week.  Crazysheet can be 10 or more.  So lets get practical about it.  Lost all Poker Money.  That's one thing down that I shouldn't focus on.  Cigarettes make a strong case, but focusing on cigarettes is a surefire way to make them les enjoyable.  Anyway, went to the doctor today, and the person before me passed out when they were taking his blood.  Then, when I came in, I asked if the guy was okay, and they gave me an award for being Sensitive.
    Hey.  Who needs poker when you've got Solitaire.  E-mail me your answers at question@email.com  Anyway.  Get somethin' to eat in half an hour.  Academic Discussion tonight.  Then spend the next 40 hours thinking about crazysheet.  That's what Horoscope told me to do.  And I'm in no position to argue.  Anyway.  What's going on in the wide world of TV.  Maybe getting a new one within a month.  I guess in practice, that'll end up being what I focus on.  Watching TV.  But really making the most out of it, you know?  Do it right this time.  Anyway.  Eminem's song growing on me.  Sometimes I feel like I want to try freestyle rap.  Wait, no.  Sometimes I feel like learning Freecell Solitaire.  There, that's what I meant.  Maybe there's a Scrabble Program I can play on Computer.  You're Playing and Learning at the same time!  I don't believe it!
    Smoking a cigarette right outside campus, lady from Disabilities CLass saw me and offered me a ride.  Now we're talking Great Classmate.  I explained how I have class later and have to smoke off campus.  Still, though-- Great Citizen.  Learnin' about autism in Disabilities Class.  I was reminded of myself back in high school, and I exhibited some major signs of autism.  For two or three years, just sat in silence and stared at my desk in every class, simultaneously hating everyone and wanting everyone to be my friend.  I'm not that way anymore, though.  Now I draw boxes in my notebook instead of staring at my desk.
    Can you only be autistic for a few years?  My guess?  Probably.  Fourth paragraph.  I don't believe it.  Anyway.  I haven't gotten an award in seven hours, and that's even if you count that imaginary award I won.  I feel like I'm more or less due.  Poetry Book for today's AAL Class was a snooze.  I blame the poetry industry.  The bloated Poetry Establishment.  Big Po-em.  That sort of crap.  It could just be, those two or three years, I was incredibly tired.  Four hours of sleep per day, I just didn't have the energy to lift my head.  And understand social cues and being in the moment.  That sort of crap.
    Fifth Paragraph.  Man does it feel good to focus on something.  That's an Adult thing to do.  Stay focused.  And we all know I'd like to become an Adult someday.  Jeez.  I'm focused on the horoscope telling me to focus as my one thing.  Sounds good to me.  One hand washes the other.  Theoretically.  Sometimes when I ass urine, I go to the sink like I'm gonna wash my hands, turn the faucet on, and then don't wash my hands.  Too lazy.  Crap.  I saw that in the high 30's of percent are more likely to vote for Moore since his sexual assaulting came to light.  Hmm.  So it turns out society is irredeemable.  Good to know.  And it's all evangelicals!  I got nothin'.  It's just rick-diculous.
    Sixth paragraph.  All this focus is really paying off.  Might get food in roughly 15 minutes.  Not gonna smoke a mid-break cigarette.  Too lazy and whatnot.  Crap and crap.  I wouldn't be surprised if Moore's campaign hires a lady to accuse him of sexual assault, then they disprove it, and it makes people think all of them were lying.  Sounds like a sound political move.  Except they didn't anticipate I'd think of it firstThat settles that.  I think there's something to the focus/cigarette equation.  For better or worse.  Or same.  Definitely one of those.
    While Hospital Emergency was happening, I asked a nurse who was ust watching it unfold if she could approximate how long it would be till I could get my blood work done.  She acted like I was not only the Biggest Asshole In The Hospital, but also like I was too mentally feeble to conceptually understand the nature of there being a person sick causing a minor emergency.  That's what made my Sensitivity Award all the more sweet.  Get food after this paragraph.  Great, just great.  I think I will smoke a cigarette.  Be back in a jiffy!  Which I believe is a peanut butter reference.
    Hey, I have more slices of pizza than I did before!  Great!  Eighth Paragraph.  Focus on eating pizza now.  Focus on Academic Discussion in an hour.  I'm not doing what I'm supposed to do--I'm supposed to focus on one thing indefinitely, not whatever I happen to be doing at the time.  Like a chump.  Anyway.  I'm gonna drink tonight.  That'll learn me for trying to stay focused!  Try to stay here another half hour.  THat would hit the spot.  Likely would be lucky to get to 20 minutes.  That's how I feel.  I like talking to people about politics.  It's like, they say how they truly feel, and I just nod along.  Like the bad guy in Tiberian Sun!  There's a reference for you.
Ninth paragraph!  Sweet.  Semester ends in exactly four weeks.  Then its time to focus on bigger and better things.  Probably gonna have cream cheese and a bagel for "dinner" tonight.  Onto bigger and better cheeses!  Point is Yo Whassup.  I had to explain Napster to someone today.  No judgment.  Jeez.  I'm eating cheese on bread right now.  But I will replace tomato sauce with toasted.  Alright, great.  One more paragraph here, then call it a day.  Until tonight.  Which is'nt much day when you think about it.  Point is Wow check out this guy's focus.  I don't know why.
    Tenth paragraph.  I need some floss.  Got crushed red pepper stuck in my teeth.  Who am I kidding, I'd just pretend to floss anyway.  Crap and crap.  I don't know.  Therapist never listened to my CD.  Good, one less thing to focus on.  I have it narrowed down to Crazysheet, cigarettes, or Academic Discussions.  If only we as humans had the inherent capabilities to multi-task.  That's loser talk.  My Horoscope wouldn't like me saying that.  Gotta get back on track.  Focus.  I wonder what Ill focus on next.  Hmm, I've been focusing less since Horoscope.  Whatta jip.  Alright, see you later tonight.
    Hey, it's now.  Later tonight.  The time that is after that crap but before you read it.  A real Crazysheet Sunset, if you will.  Anyway.  Focusin, huh?  That's what I was focused on back then.  Now I'm focused on how to keep myself busy without any poker.  This is gonna take a lot of focus to figure this one out!  Anyway, crap and crap.  I impressed Professor today by humming the tune to The Entertainer.  That settles that Academic Discussion.  Anyway.  He split us into groups which we had to talk to.  There was a girl in my group!  I don't mean to brag or anything.  Then, when we were reporting our Conversation Results to the class, she was saying stuff, and Professor wanted her to elaborate, and I jumped in and elaborated for her!  Thus increasing the amount of respect both Professor and Student had for me.
    Life.  Wonderful.  I don't have any Camel Blues left.  I had half a pack that fell behind my desk, and that's the end of that.  I don't have the time to pull forward my desk for 10 seconds.  That's 10 seconds I could have spend writing this sentence.  Anyway, what the what.  Reality of Class Ending is creeping up on me.  Had a very general idea of what to do for AAL Paper.  One of the books was all about African-American popular music post-slavery, like spirituals, and then ragtime, and then potentially jazz and blues.  And I'll be like, Yo, this is how the current state of the music industry is similar and different from these times we've learned so much about through poetry.  It's got a lot going for it.  It's a topic-- that's key.  I like music-- good.  Three-- what was I talking about?
    It turns out I'm a lot, a lot, happier without focus.  I hope I never have to focus again!  Without focus, couldn't have elaborated Conversation Results for the girl.  I guess it has its time and place.  Anyway, what the what.  Also, that horoscope was for the entire week.  Anyway.  I'ma take the road less traveled.  While everyone born in December is gonna be focusing, like Chumps, I'm gonna unfocus it up and be a trailblazer.  What is this, the 13th paragraph?  Yeah it is.  What else is going on.  Gonna snap my eyeglasses into twine in protest.  I don't know.  Somethin' about Trump the II corresponding with WikiLeaks.  Not a fan.  That's my official position.
    Crap and crap.  I usually have a nice dinner planned for when entry is over.  Now all I got is a bagel.  Maybe make a bagel sandwich, best case scenario.  What else is going on.  14th paragraph.  That's great.  Trying to think of Back Up Meals.  I want to order some MREs from the internet.  Ready Made Meals for Army Participants.  I like the idea of it.  You got your protein, your side, a desert.  All in one tight little package.  Even just get a TV dinner, something about it appeals to me.  Great, just great.  I have Lean Pocket.  I got Breakfast Sandwich.  I have 5 or 6 chicken nuggets.  Doin' a full inventory.  Bagel.  Sliced Turkey AND Salami.  Hmm.  I've given me a lot to think about.
    Anyway.  I'll make the best of my limited options, I can assure you of that.    You know, like in life?  Except for the making the best part.  My point is I have limited options in life.  That settles that!  Crap and crap.  I may even eat mid-entry.  Can't rule anything out at this point.  What if I made two bagels.  That's rick-diculous. Get out of here with that bullshit.  What if I made one and a half bagels.  Now you're talkin'.  Anyway, what the what.  Hey, what's up.  Had 1/4th of a black and white cookie just now.  Future-- bagel sandwich, I'm predicting.  The point is great, what paragraph is it.  15th.  That means 16 is next!  Which means 5 more most likely.
    How about that crap.  I don't know.  Live Podcast on Friday.  That's a thing that'll provide me with the structure I so desperately crave.  For a few hours, at least.  That sort of crap and whatnot.  It's hard to write paragraphs without something else to do.  This'll be the last one.  Great.  Another day in the books.  I did stuff and it was great.  I'll see ya later.

-10:48 P.M.


Saturday, November 11, 2017

A Regular Title

      Alright!  Let's see if I can do an entry.  Got a few hours this late afternoon with nothing else to do.  So, sure, why not.  Read my fair share of Dickens today.  Dunno if it was a problem with the printing, or he made the mistake originally, but there's a sentence that doesn't end with a period (or anything else).  Point is Book is ruined.  Period!  Crap and crap.  Up to 35 dollars in poker.  As of now.  Actually, at roughly 25 dollars.  As of yesterday.  Dunno why that information is pertinent.  Anyway, jeez.  This entry may still Not Exist.  Not 100% pot committed to it yet.  No testosterone.  No guitar fixed.  No nothin'. 
    Whatta jip.  Here I am, experiencing life and living for weeks like a chump, and the stuff that I planned isn't even happening!  Anyway, what else is crap.  The point is Roy Moore, in his mid 30's, was good friends with teenage girls.  That settles that.  And here we were, imagining the worst.  Apparently Putin told Trump he didn't meddle with the election.  That settles that.  It was kind of weird how he made an exaggerated wink at Trump while he said it.  What else.  Black Electrical Tape I put over my phone's camera fell off, had to replace it.  I don't want anyone to see me masturbating.  It's not like I'm Louie CK or something.  Topics.
    Third paragraph.  I have a recurring dream where my nails are healthier and more robust than they are in real life.  I bite my nails, so they're in bad shape.  In my dreams, though, they're thriving and full of life.  Gotta dream about something.  And it's a good dream because these nails are ripe for biting.  Anyway, what the what.  Can't wait to get my whammy bar.  I'm gonna be playing ~# tablatures all over the place.  Are there any animals that have shown they can do music.  Makes sense if there's a chimpanzee or something, you put him in front of a piano, he could figure it out.  I'm not saying every chimpanzee, but it wouldn't be crazy to think one or two could do it.
    The point is a thousand monkeys at typewriters for all of time can never write Smells Like Teen Spirit.  Because type writers don't make music.  I guess they could figure out the chords.  Hmm, I've given me a lot to think about.  Hell, if it's for all of time, they could even figure out tablature.  The point is Lets Ally with Chimpanzees vs. Artificial Intelligence.  I'm full of great ideas.  A lot of people didn't like the 2001 Planet Of The Apes, but it did give us the phrase Aperaham Lincoln.  So it's not all bad.  Crap and crap.  Maybe that was released in 2000.  Pretty sure it's one of those.
    Fifth paragraph.  What if Artificial Intelligence is so smart it can figure out how to communicate with animals.  Then it's fuckin' AI teaming up with animals against us!  Gotta be worried about something.  I don't know.  I wonder if, when AI declares war on humans, if there's gonna be any turncoats.  Like that guy in The Matrix who likes steak, but without the matrix.  Just some guy whose into robots and wants to help out, with no immediate gratification for his actions.  Anyway, what the what.  Show in 6 and a half weeks.  Gotta practice.  Should try to make it better than the first show.  Better singin', better song selection, no muckin' up on guitar.  Better small talk between songs.
    You know, say words, instead of just UHH or UMM.  People wanna hear words, that's what they're here for.  Gotta get to at least ten paragraphs.  That goes without saying.  Except I said it.  Unnecessarily, apparently.  Gonna take a break from entry.  Worked yesterday.  Alright, I'm back.  Was gone all of 20,30 minutes.  That's how that goes.  Real good replenish my life force time.  That sort of crap.  The point is Great.  Gotta write some great paragraphs.  I gotta be proud of something.  Might as well be Internet Comedy.  What the what.  Just opened a bottle of soda for my Mom.  She couldn't do it.  Dad couldn't do it.  Hey, got something to be proud about!  Integrity!
Integrity sounds great.  I hope to have some one day.  Seventh paragraph and whatnot.  I find it odd that I like movies about football but not really football.  I also find it odd I like Batman movies, but in real life, probably wouldn't like Batman.  Seems like kind of a dick.  The point is Movies Make Everything Better.  What else is going on.  I also like movies about Baseketball, but haven't seen one game in real life.  I don't know.  Sorry.  Let's figure out a way to make the rest of the entry good.  Maybe this is one of those entries that we're all happier with it ending sooner.  On account of quality.  Poor quality.  No good for nothin'.
    Anyway, jeez.  Eighth paragraph.  There's a character in Bleak House that's a grown man who acts like a child.  That's his thing.  And people tolerate it because he's congenial.  So the point is New Role Model.  That sort of crap.  When Cheerleaders do a really good dance, do they throw a touchdown to celebrate?  Whatta mix-em-up!  I don't believe it.  Crap and crap.  On the one hand, playing football is terrible for your health.  On the other hand, I like watching people hurt each other.  Real conundrum there.  Especially if you've been playing football.  One would imagine everything you could possibly conceive of manifests itself as a conundrum.  Conundrums especially!
    I guess?  What else.  Ninth paragraph.  Gonna get Veal Parmesan for dinner.  Easy way out.  Sounds good to me.  Accidentally made a call in Poker when I didn't mean to.  Whatta Brain damage.  What were we talking about.  Oh, right.  Conundrums.  Crap and crap.  One day I hope to become a Hot Shot Rookie Quarterback.  Might be too old at this point.  Whatta jip.  I spent my entire 20's, almost a full decade, not being a hot shot rookie quarterback.  I don't believe it.  I'd settle for being a hot shot veteran wide receiver.  I'm not all that particular as long as I'm a hot shot.
    Anyway, jeez.  Tenth paragraph.  Gettin into a little bit of a groove.  Groovy.  2 Academic Discussions on Monday.  Can't wait.  I'ma be like, Lemme raise my hand I got stuff to say.  Cool.  I don't know.  Probably the last paragraph.  I got that going for me and whatnot.  Damn, even in that scenario, I still gotta say more stuff!  Might as well aim for 15 if we're being ridiculous.  Hell, make it 20!  40!  Think I'll stick at 15.  That settles that and whatnot.  Hot Shot Paragraph Writer.  Except not at this moment.  We all got moments when we're not our best selves.  Probably.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Maybe I'll get Buffalo Wings.
That settles that!  Five paragraphs to go.  Good chance there will be a break at some point.  Crap and crap.  Maybe even Now.  Cool!  Crap and crap.  Maybe get Chicken Parmesan.  Sounds like a compromise.  I'm the great compromiser!  About time it's being recognized.  Maybe get Veal Parmesan.  That's not a great compromise.  I'm the great stubborner!  About time I was considered great.  Playin' above my means in poker.  Gotta mix life up sometimes.  By playing above your means.  If you know a better way to mix life up, I'd like to hear it.
Probably.  12th paragraph.  What else.  I don't know.  I have too much money on poker.  Better lose some.  By becoming the Bettor.  With worse hands.  While watching BET.  Anyway, what the what.  There's a Women-Centric offshoot of BET, and sometimes they have movies that men are permitted to watch, and their commercial breaks are insane.  I'm talking, 16 or 20 commercials each break, and that's not an exaggeration.  Gotta think of some joke for that.  Gotta be proper and stuff, too. Hmm.  I guess they're... market for black women... joke... humor... mixemup?  Well, that settles that.
    13th paragraph.  I like the new Eminem song.  Is it the funnest song?  No.  But it has an important message.  Beyonce can walk on water, but she's still not perfect.  And it's implied that message applies to Eminem, too.  The more I think about it, the more and more I realize Kingpin is the perfect movie.  And I think about it a lot.  Anyway.  I also think about playing whiffleball in gym in high school a lot.  Just picture myself there, lacing a line drive over the 3rd baseman.  Gotta think about something!  Otherwise your mind would break.  Won money in poker.  Whatta jip.  I wanted to lose all my money in a blaze of glory!
    14th paragraph.  Maybe put off eating for a few hours.  Like last night.  That paid off big time then.  Anyway.  Somehow got to the 14th paragraph.  Guess I'll go for the standard 20 at this point.  I had a dream with my brother in it, and I had to break the news to him my friends don't really like you, and he took it into consideration and changed his behavior.  Which is weird in a lot of respects.  One-- don't have friends.  Two-- if I did, why wouldn't they like him?  Three-- he had a change of heart immediately.  Oh well, dream 'em if you got 'em. 
    I don't know.  Dreams, am I right?  Whatever.  My brother might represent me in the dream.  On account of him being a lot like me in real life.  The point is Great.  The friends I don't have don't respect me as much as I thought they might.  Time to have an immediate change of heart!  Crap and crap.  15th paragraph.  Time to have an immediate second half of paragraph.  I don't know.  It wasn't just disrespect.  It was more actively disliking.  The point is c'mon bro, get on board with my friends.  You've already had a change of heart, and that's a big step forward.  Crap and crap.  When you really think about it, the movie Draft Day had pretty much nothing happen in it.  Here's the entire plot of the movie draft day--  We're gonna trade our draft pick to someone else.  The End.
    16th paragraph.  Maybe have a bit of Spaghett when it gets here, put rest in fridge.  I also got a piece of Tiramisu.  Because I don't care about making healthy choices these days.  Anyway, what the what.  I'll be on testosterone soon, that'll magically change my metabolism.  That's my mindset.  Hey, I don't believe it.  This entry is actually going Good Enough.  Amazing.  I wish Al Pacino was my coach.  Just in life, and stuff.  That sort of crap.  I remember the last time I played football, I think the summer between Freshman and Sophomore year of college, I made like four touchdown catches in a row.  The point is I can be surprisingly adequate and sports under optimal conditions.  I remember in summer camp, as an elementary schooler (not a real summer camp, just a 9 am-1 pm piece of crap at a public school), we would play regular dodge ball, where it's two teams, and we would also play a dodge ball where it's a free for all.  Free For All Dodge ball is the way to go, if you're gonna play dodge ball.  That's my take on things.  This paragraph is too long.
I just had to talk about dodge ball, didn't I.  17th paragraph.  I can't believe it.  I'm feeling some, dare I say it... integrity?  On account of my surprising adequacy?  I can't get enough of this stuff!  Anyway.  I have the song title Integrity Blues in my head, but I can't find it on iTunes.  It might have been something I made up a few months ago and then forgot I made it up.  Anyway, what the what.  I wonder if that's what drives Louie CK.  Hmm, I don't have integrity because I'm a monster... better write some comedy that people like to try to make up for it.  My guess?  Possibly!  Anyway, 17th paragraph.  Just hit a wall.  Just saying 17th paragraph demoralized me immediately.
    18th paragraph.  Alright back in action.  Hmm.  What else.  I've been writing a lot of entries this semester.  Good for me.  Anyway, what the what.  May aim for 25 paragraphs, that's how I feel right now at this very moment in time that's also right now.  Anyway, with that kind of crap, I'll make 25 paragraphs in no time!  I want it to take some time.  That's where the fun comes from.  What else.  SNL in five hours.  I can't wait to find out what this host is all about.  Probably do some comedy throughout the show, that would be my hypothesis.  People apparently angry at Larry David for his riff on the Holocaust.  I think we're reaching a breaking point in criticizing people for making light of the Holocaust.  Because over the next decade or two, the people who actually survived the Holocaust are gonna die off.  So people would be criticizing it more in theory than because they actually experienced it.
    The point is Open Season For Holocaust Jokes!  Wait, no.  That's no good.  Anyway, what the what.  One thing I thought of that's in my top 20 things I've ever thought of was The Diarrhea Anne Frank.  I'm proud of weird things.  Simple enough that others must have thought of it before me.  Oh well, live and learn.  I must have said it here before, too, because my diary is like diarrhea, too.  The word Sheet was, after all, inspired by the word Shit.  And diarrhea is crazy shit, those of us who have experienced know.  Also, importantly, the content is, colloquially, excrement.  The point is just hit a wall typing that bit.  Am I past the wall yet?  Almost... almost... nope, further back...
    What paragraph is this.  20th.  Cool!  What else is going on.  I don't know.  I'm 3 dollars away from having a 40 dollar bankroll.  That's some crazy shit right there.  Cray Cray Shizznit.  I used to have a few fake Tenacious D Songs on my mp3 player the first year of high school.  One was a comedy band doing a parody of Margaritaville called Marijuanaville, inappropriately attributed to Tenacious D in the artist title.  Another one that I don't remember what it was, was called My Biznitch Is The Shiznit.  The point is How Dare The Internet sully Tenacious D's good name with that nonsense. 
    21st paragraph!  Alright!  I always associated the song title Tribute with the word tributary.  Like, this song deposits into the river of quality music.  Because I think weird things sometimes every now and then.  I had the version, on my mp3 player, from the Tenacious D show, rather than the album version.  Which is better.  Cause it musically references Stairway To Heaven.  Which they had to drop for the album because of copywriting and stuff.  Point is A+ Super Fan.  D+, at least.  It's The D, Plus Me!  I don't believe it.  What else is going on.  Those were my three first favorite bands that came about that year.  Tenacious D, AC/DC, and Led Zeppelin.  Strong Rock background to have, I feel.  That'll lead you towards the river or lake of quality music.  And all of them weren't organized into albums.  Just listened to them song-by-song.
    Cool!  22nd paragraph.  Anyway, 22nd paragraph.  I just said that.  Oh well, live and learn.  I don't know.  I also had 3 Bright Eyes Songs and 4 Sublime Songs.  So that led to music too one would assume.  And judging by my future taste in music, probably more a result of Sublime and Bright Eyes than the other three.  The point is we're getting all of it right out into the open right now.  Sweet!  What else is crap.  I'm looking forward to Tenacious D releasing a book at some point.  Like a memoir, be if factual, or silly and fictional, or whatever.  Seems like a logical and awesome step for them to take.  You heard it here first! ------Diarrhea Anne Frank!
I don't know.  Still typing bullshit here for some reason.  Makes me happy.  When first starting to think about doing my own music, I never really thought explicitly about making it funny, but I think it having it be funny, or at the least irreverent, bled into it a little bit.  Just hit a wall.  Will use bathroom to see if that helps me with this wall situation.  Hey, Any Given Sunday is still on!  I don't believe it.  Wall, what wall.  23rd paragraph.  Maybe go for the 30, I don't know, that might be wishful thinking.  Crap and crap.  I wanna see something new from Tom Green.
    Not sure where that came from.  Canada, probably.  What else is going on.  I could be over 40 dollars after this entry.  I could be at 5 dollars.  Gotta play to win.  Anyway, crap and crap, that's how I feel.  I may have between 5 and 40 dollars.  I may have less than 5 dollars.  I may have more than 40 dollars.  These are all the possibilities.  Glad I covered that.  Anyway, jeez.  What else.  No movie in AAL class this week!  An Academic Discussion is all but guaranteed.  I don't know.  Also, good Entry Writing Time between classes.  A little bit of a break from the regular week entries.  In a different place, have a little bit of Life Experience under my belt to inspire me.  The point is this paragraph is over.
    What are we at now.  25th.  I don't believe it!  I don't know.  Gotta get back into some comedy instead of music autobiographies.  What else is going on.  Any Given Sunday is ending.  Whatta jip.  Whatta turn my TV to now.  I'll check The Guide. BRB.  In my old room, which I inhabited during the olden days I was just talking about, the TV and Computer Monitor were in the same direction.  I can't even fathom the implications of that!  Hmm, an hour left in Castaway.  Still early enough into it that He's Still A Castaway!  I can dig that crap.  I don't know.  What else is going on.  I'm pretty sure Castaway is a reference for when the screenwriter made a deal with an executive producer to start the pre-production on the film.  I know how films work, c'mon.
Also, just mad the connection with Donna Brazile's book called Hacks.  Cause it's also about "A writer or journalist producing dull, unoriginal work."  According to internet.  Didn't realize it was specific to journalists or writers.  What else is going on.  I heard 30,000 volleyballs auditioned for the role of Wilson.  I also heard jeez.  Crap and crap.  26th paragraph.  Four and a half to go!  Sounds perfect.  I don't know.  Today be 11/11.  That's a lot of... 11's.  Two!  I can count and everything.  At least up to 2.  After four, it gets a little hazy.  I believe Wilson was based on Tim Allen's neighbor in Home Improvement.  Because they have the same name.  That's what basing something on means.
    Ho Ho Ho.  Crap and carp.  Castaway is bumming me out.  I think hearing Tom Hanks talk to an imaginary and unreceptive audience is making me feel bad about this entry.  Oh well, gotta feel bad about something.  27th paragraph.  Cool beans.  Also, Castaway is escaping his deserted island.  While I'm still here. I don't believe it.  What else.  I just turned off the TV entirely.  And by that I mean Muted it.  I can't turn it off completely, then I'll just have to turn it back on eventually.  I'm pretty good at cutting corners.  Gonna pour myself more beverage in a minute.  Soon as the Big Blind comes back around to me.  Which is... Now.  What else. ...You know, cause I'm really into Ska and Reggae now?  I had seven or eight Bob Marley songs on the mp3 player in high school.  That's more reggae than most kids in my high school listened to.
    And now I like Reel Big Fish under optimal conditions.  What else is going on, 28th paragraph.  I don't know.  Crap and crap.  Anyway.  Whattado when Entry is Over.  Got a few hours before Mom/Son Binding Time watching SNL.  Eat dinner at some point one would imagine.  I don't know.  Listen to Sublime's "cover" of No Woman No Cry.  It has different lyrics and I suspect it may have different music.  Never thought I'd be able to call a song a, 'cover,' in quotation marks.  Well, the recordings I have of myself covering music, quotation marks apply to that.  But that's due to poor quality rather than it being a completely different song.
    29th paragraph!  This may go on forever.  One can dream, right?  I hope so.  Otherwise, what have I been doin' all this sleeping for?  Anyway.  Hit a wall just now.  And only two paragraphs to go until I'll force myself to stop!  Whatta jip.  Crap and crap.  Whatta semester this has been.  It's led to weekly entries with two titles.  Couldn't have asked for more, is my take away.  At around 32 dollars at this very moment.  That's a lot of dollars, I got no qualms with 32 dollars.  The point is what else is crap.  Gonna take a bathroom break soon.  All is right in the world.  Alright, what else.  Time to wrap it up and retreat to my nothing life. AA STARTING HAND BRB.  WON A FEW DOLLARS BACK.  That settles that.
    30!  Wow.  The point is Sure Life Is Great.  What else.  34 dollars as of now.  If that ain't great I don't know what is.  35 dollars.  Now we're talkin'!  Anyway, jeez.  Hey, gotta show in six and a half weeks!  Startin' to get pmped about it.  Just now, based on that sentence.  First real gettin pumped about it since I booked it.  Gotta get pumped about something.  Have we learned nothing from Big Poppa Pump?  Wayne's World is on in 10 minutes.  Now we're talking Great Saturday.  I'm not gonna watch that.  I might.  I hope not.  You got a better idea?  One will present itself.  How can you be so sure?  Just a hypothesis.  Ok.  Write another paragraph.
Can't argue with that.  Hey, The Lego Batman Movie is on at 8.  That's something I can actually watch.  I don't believe it!  What else is crap.  Almost done.  31 paragraphs.  Used to go to PS 31 for Elementary School.  So it makes sense I guess.  Anyway.  That was back when I went to PS 213 for summer camp.  Jeez.  Crap and crap.  You mean I gotta listen to Will Arnett for two hours?!  Yep, that's what it means.  Oh okay alright then.  Anyway.  At 35 dollars now.  And we're almost done here!  I don't believe it.  Maybe The LEGO Batman Movie will teach me important life lessons.  I don't know as of this point.  I guess that's it.  I'll see ya later.

-7:57 P.M. 


Friday, November 10, 2017

Entry Attempt #484

      Roughly.  Let's see if I can do it.  Wrote that on Thursday.  Wasn't able to do it.  But now it's Friday.  If there's anything I know about Friday, it's a day you can potentially do stuff on.  What's going on and crap.  Gonna read AAL Book today.  Dickens tomorrow probably.  Louie CK is a terrible person it turns out.  My first instinct was to tweet or post on Facebook, Now seems like a good time to point out that Louie CK is overrated.  But then I read references to some of his bits in news about him and was like, actually he's pretty good.  Still a terrible person, though!  I have no difficulty reconciling these two things.  He's solidly in the Terrible Person category.
    Until his statement today.  Sad to say, I kinda bought it.  Part of it is I wanna be on the Winning Team.  And I've deduced, taking everything into consideration, he's gonna be back in good graces within a few years.  Whatta jip.  Anyway.  I've never taken my dick out unless I had a damn good reason to.  That's how I feel.  I also thought of, "Louie C Kock."  Not sure why, but I did.  Anyway.  First person I particularly admired that I could think of to be outed as a sexual bad guy.  Oh well, live and learn.  I get a lot of kicks intellectually, but I don't get jerking off in front of people who don't wanna see it.  I guess I'll live and learn at some point.
    Anyway, jeez.  I mean, I jerk off in front of porn.  They don't want to see it.  But they can't see it.  And that doesn't add to the excitement or anything.  I'm not looking at a JPEG fantasizing the JPEG is looking back at me disapprovingly.  What else is going on.  I don't like the 'Whisper Network' that women have in lines of business to alert each other of sexual bad guys.  No fair, keepin' secrets.  I like whispering too!  Anyway, jeez.  Crap and crap.  Third paragraph-- seems like this entry will indeed be made.  Just lost 3 dollars.  I blame this entry.  Still got cash.  What else is going on.
    3 paragraphs vs 3 dollars.  I'll take the paragraphs.  But the paragraphs weren't that great.  Hmm.  I'll take the dollars.  Damn, can't go back!  QQ IN BB BRB.  WON A LITTLE BIT BACK.  That'll learn 'em.  Gonna sit at a 1.5 dollar sit 'n go.  That'll get the juices flowing.  Anyway, what the what.  Entryin' it up.  With nothin' to say.  That's a winning combination.  Roy Moore raped a 14 year old girl, but it's okay.  Good to know.  Doubled up in first hand of 6 person sit 'n go.  Good to know.  What else.  Gotta get to some goofballs eventually.  Law of probability.  Probability it a law, right?
Anyway.  Won the Sit 'n Go.  Now we're talking Great Entry.  Jeez.  What a crappy entry.  Fifth paragraph.  We can do, as a society, without any more Louie CK and his comedy.  That being said, fuck this guy.  That settles that.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I don't know.  Ima take a break to read AAL Poetry Book.  Continue this entry later today.  Alright, read that poetry book.  Went pretty quickly.  On account of there being less words per page.  That sort of crap.  Considered scrapping this entry altogether, but there is still hope for it yet.  Anyway, still the fifth paragraph.
    Not anymore!  Cool.  The point is Three Academic Discussions in the next 5 days.  I can't wait!  Also, really should see an Advisor Wednesday After Class.  Put it off for too long!  Time to see what's what.  Anyway, jeez.  Louie CK is a terrible person.  I'm back in that mindset 100%.  Who cares if he's sorry.  He still did what he did when he diddled his did in front of observerdids.  Sorry.  I don't know.  Hmm... Is this website the equivalent of jerking off in front of people who didn't ask for it?  Metaphorically, sure.  But it's not literal, so it's not sex.  And you're here for some reason, most likely on your own accord.  So the point is I'm Not A Bad Sex Guy. 
    That's my story and I'm stickin' to it!  What else.  Seventh paragraph.  I don't know.  Trying to think of what to do after I graduate.  I could write a book!  Sounds easy to me.  Just write a bunch of paragraphs, bam, you've got a book.  It would be silly and irreverent and everything.  Characters?  You Bet I'll have some characters.  Loose plot to facilitate stupidness?  You Bet!  Playing poker while I write it?  Bet, Check,  CALLING.  The point is I'll Never Be Able To Actually Do That.  Whew, that's a relief.  I was on the verge of actually putting effort into trying something.
    Anyway, what else.  Eighth paragraph.  That how that go.  Could write a book of poetry.  Hey Whassup it's a poem ya'll like it so far?  That's the prologue.  One poem down, 39 to go!  Everyone knows you need 40 books for a book of poetry.  That's just common sense.  What else is going on.  Apparently the poem ends with 'you like it so far?'  It's poetic, because there's no more, even though it says 'so far.'  Really makes ya think.  Hmm.  What else.  Eminem's new song "Dropped" today.  It was alright.  I prefer the silly and irreverent Eminem, though, if I had to choose. And it didn't even end with Ya'll like my album so far?  What else is going on.
    Ninth paragraph.  it did end with Hey I wrote that song Stan, remember that?  Not 100% sure why that's important.  I guess the rest of the album will give us context.  Anyway.  Eminem is still pretty young, all things considered.  Even if you consider 2/3rds of things, or even half.  I don't know.   Wonder if there was any legal battles with his bastardization of the candy M 'n Ms.  One would imagine it was an issue at some point.  Maybe the candy was on board with it from the start.  Good product placement and whatnot.  But they had no idea he would be popular right at the beginning. 
    Anyway, I don't know.  M 'n M's don't endorse Eminem's ... I forgot what I was talking about.  It's the tenth paragraph!  What else is going on.  Whatta do with this weekend.  I've ruled out going to the open mic.  I've ruled out doing something productive with my life.  I have it narrowed down to Nothing or Barely More Than Nothing.  Can't wait to find out!  Just ordered dinner through my father as a proxy.  It'll be here in rouhgly 40 minutes.  Then it's time for a second break from writing entry.  Cool!  I like how the last six paragraphs were no better than the first four, but because there's more of it, I'm more proud of it.  Quantity!  That's step one for preparing to write a whole book.  Get used to writing quantity, even if its crap.  Probably.  No one ever gave me steps for writing books.
    Anyway, 11th paragraph!  The truth is, Louie CK was a sexual predator, but his persona as a comedian corrupts this factual image of him for me, and I just imagine him being a goofus and taking his penis out and being like why am I doing this, I'ma riff on this uncomfortability and it'll be fun, whereas in actuality, he was being a full fledged monster.  Whew, figured that out.  I'm A+ Number 1 guy.  What else is going on.  But there's still that small part of me, how's he gonna do a routine on this crap when he comes back.  Anyway, what else is going on.  By the way, I've got over 20 dollars in poker!  Been there since yesterday.  You had no way of knowing.  Unless you're hacking my computer and monitoring my every Digital Move.  If so, got any tips for Solitaire?  Not winning as much as I should be.
You've been studying my game, now it's your turn to give me some tips.  12th paragraph.  I feel like Jesus did a lot greater stuff than walk on water.  He walks on water, cool, that's a nice party trick.  Never really put it to any practical use, as far as I know.  He never was separated from a leper by a lake, and was like, JESUS POWER ACTIVATE! and crossed the lake to cure him.  He did stuff that helped people in a tangible way, though.  So that's my take on things.  Anyway.  Gettin' a Bacon Burger Deluxe.  Sounds good to me.  That's why I ordered it.  Jeez.  Republicans in Alabama.  On the one hand, he did rape a 14 year old.  But on the other hand... it turns out I have no morals.  Quite a conundrum.
    13th paragraph.  Lookin' forward to eating.  It's like life, except you get to stuff your fat face with stuff.  I'm on board with that.  Apparently Trump gained 100 pounds since his election.  That's a good sign of a responsible, measured person.  A guy eating enough to gain 100 pounds in a year.  Being president is hard, ya eat when you're stressed.  Maybe he should quit then.  My take.  Let him eat Trump Steaks every day.  ...I kind of want to see what a Trump Steak tastes like.  I'm not 800 calories!  When you eat me, you actually lose weight!  More jokes on that riff.  I'm too hungry to think.
    Not that hungry, but am relatively weak from hunger.  Which doesn't make a lot of sense, I ate a muffin for breakfast/lunch.  But that's how the cookie crumbles I guess.  Maybe I'm just weak in general and I'm attributing it to hunger.  Sounds like a reasonable conclusion to make.  Apparnetly that was Beyonce on Eminem's song.  I'm not 100% sure why but I can't name 1 Beyonce song I particularly like.  Or would recognize.  Guess it's just not my cup of tea.  Sorry.  I will step down as Crazysheet in advance due to all the backlash that admission will bring.  Wait, no I won't.  I got paragraphs to write!  It would be irresponsible to stop now.
    15th paragraph.  I don't believe it!  I like Bacon Burgers.  It's like Hamburgers, but I'm rebelling against my Jewish Heritage!  I think my Dad told me that his grandmother or something wouldn't eat hamburgers because it says 'ham' in them.  Damn, private information.  Now you know my Dad's secrets.  What else is going on.  There's a good chance when Food Comes I'll put it in Oven for 20 or 30 minutes.  My Dad's Grandmother wouldn't use Ovens, out of Solidarity with Holocaust Victims.  More Private Information!  Oh no!  Crap and crap.  Jesus, I just had some realization,  There were thousands and thousands and maybe millions of Germans who were on board with putting millions of people into ovens.  Not on board with the Holocaust.  Makin' my position known here and now!
    What else.  Putting Food in Oven not only makes it hotter/the fries crispier, but it lets me eat 20 or 30 minutes later.  Sounds good to me.  16th paragraph.  So, poing of this entry-- 1)Louie CK is a monster, 2)Holocaust was bad.  3)I need to research Beyonce Songs to find some I like.  Anyway, jeez.  Beyonce is related to Harry Knowles, right?  And Harry Knowles is a reference people would recognize, right?  Right?  Anyway, jeez.  25 paragraphs seems within reach.  On account of previous break and future break.  Gotta come up with a better idea than I'm Gonna Write The Mediocre American Novel! for when I graduate.  I've given me a lot to think about.
    Everyone's always trying to write the great American novel.  No one thinks to write the mediocre one.  It's an untapped market.  Except not market.  Idea.  Something like that.  Anyway.  Bill Maher tonight.  Some real Mother/Son/Possibly Father binding time.  Bonding time.  I said Binding time!  Whatta unintended goof.  Freudian slip, maybe?  I want to get binded to my Mother.  Ohhh boy.  Dickens Tomorrow.  2 non-Dickens articles I gotta read either tomorrow or Sunday.  I'm leaning towards Sunday.  Balences things out more appropriately.  See, Dickens never tried to write The Great American Novel, and he turned out okay.  Whatta clunker.
    Food came, put it in the fridge.  Too early for me to eat.  Not that hungry.  Kind of weak from hunger, but that's not hunger.  That's weakness.  And my Dojo doesn't tolerate weakness.  Our teacher is one of the bad teachers from Karate Kid.  Oh well, pot committed to his teachings at this point.  Good to have something to look forward to.  What paragraph is this.  18th I think.  Cool.  Right now it's 5:50.  Probably put food in oven between 7 and 8.  Leave it there for 30,40 minutes.  I'm good at math.  Because I can correctly use and identify numbers.  Gotta start with the basics.
19th paragraph.  Won a couple of dollars in poker with QQ vs 88 preflop.  Knockin some crap out of the park.  Hey Ima do a sit 'n go in addition right now.  Sounds like fun.  Apparently Bleak House has a surprise ending or something.  Maybe not surprise, but some sort of crazy shit.  Can't wait to find out.  Except I can wait.  And will.  So, I got that going for me.  Not eating now stretches out the Joy that is Part Of Today.  Plus, I even did homework!  Whatta Day, is the point.  C- Entry.  Won money on poker.  Did homework.  Have Eaten and Will Have Eaten More.  Potential Binding Time with Mother and/or Father.  Wow.  I don't believe it.  Heard Beyonce in a song.  I didn't know it was her at first!
    29th paragraph.  Err, scratch that.  20th paragraph.  I don't have time to edit!  What else is going on.  I ain't that hungry.  That'll show me!  The main thing I know about Beyonce is that her and Jay-Z are the better version of Kanye and Kim.  Is that racist.  I feel like it's a solid 40,45% racist.  Especially now that I qualified it with that.  I also know I had a gay roommate for a few months who literally listened to All The Single Ladies all day every day.  Except when he interrupted it by watching Beyonce on Ellen and/or Oprah.  Don't remember which one.  So yeah, I'd say I'm an expert on pop music.  No one's gonna hold me to it, might as well say it.
    30t... wait, no.  21st paragraph.  SNL is tomorrow.  The host is A Lady I Don't Know and the musical guest is a Pop Music Lady I'm Aware Of.  That's my hot take on things and whatnot.  Crap and crap.  21st paragraph, huh?  I can dig it.  Just got lucky in the Sit 'n Go.  That settles that.  I been drinking today.  I feel like we've progressed enough to a point in our website/viewer relationship that I can be honest with you.  Anyway.  Won a couple more dollars in poker.  Knockin' life out of the park.  Crapdom, I don't know.  At least 25 paragraphs here.  Maybe even shoot for 30.  Hah, a guy at my poker table's username is SalmonFlushdie.  I"m on board with that.
    22nd paragraph.  Came in 2nd at the sit 'n go.  That's cashing!  I don't believe it.  I have over 26 dollars.  That's insane.  That's, jeez, I don't even know.  Words escape me.  Except the opposite.  Words are escaping you, they're leaving your mouth, you're saying words.  Words can't escape you, that's what that phrase means.  Clunker.  Anyway, what the what.  So far I've been good about not moving up in stakes with this increased bankroll.  The real test'll be when I start losing.  That's when I move up in stakes, in the past.  To try to make up for all that I lost.  Point is What Else And Crap.  Gonna play another sit 'n go.  That's sort of moving up in stakes.  Risking over a dollar and a half on that nonsense.
    Anyway, 23rd paragraph.  At some point, this entry will end.  And Regular Life will resume.  Whatta jip, am I right?  Anyway.  What kinda Life could I figure out to be good enough after this entry and not counting dinner and potential binding time.  Hmm.  That's a tough one.  One idea, not committed to it, probably won't happen-- read me some Dickens.  Something to consider.  It would be a real Adult Move, I feel.  Anyway, jeez.  Gonna pour myself more Drink w/ Alcohol when the sit 'n go is over.  Good to have stuff to look forward to.  Also got Matzoh Ball Soup for dinner.  Was supposed to get it with a dinner afew nights ago and they didn't send it.  So now they did.  To make up for it.  I can't have Soup w/ bacon burger, though.  That would be insane.
    24th paragraph.  Jeez.  Lost the sit 'n go.  Time for Beverage Break.  Aand I'm back.  Can alcohol satisfy your hunger.  It's got calories.  Calories is food.  I think it's supposed to make you more dehydrated, though.  I don't have all the details.  I'm not a fan of the new Coke Zero that's been made to taste like regular Coca Cola.  I don't like that taste.  Change it back!  Based on me.  That sort of crap.  Registering in another sit 'n go.  I'm out of control!  Point is What Else Is Going On.  6:36 right now.  Not sure when I'm gonna eat dinner.  I'm gonna eat the Great American Dinner.
    Because of things and crap.  I don't now.  25th paragraph.  Guess 30 is a good target.  Just like when I consider my Life Expectancy.  Over a year more?  I'm On Board With That!  What else is great.  I got a year until I'm 30.  That's another good measure of Gotta Do Something to go along with graduating college.  Hmm.  I've given myself a lot to think about.  What else.  Crap and crap.  Gotta write some more for some reason.  Who knows for sure.  I guess I can stop after this paragraph.  That sounds about right.  Over 24 dollars still on poker.  I can dig it.  I'll see ya'll later.

-6:53 P.M.


Wednesday, November 8, 2017

Time To Make The Entries!

      Entry.  I don't know, jeez.  Wednesday After School.  Talked to teacher after class.  Hey, did Dickens write this crap as it went, or did he have it written out before hand.  Turns out He wrote it as he went, but had drafts written before hand.  Now I know things.  And my teacher knows things!  That I'm a great student, thirsty for knowledge, that only she could impart on me.  Great stuff.  Anyway, huh?!  Week.  Over.  I guess.  Feels kind of weird wishing people a happy weekend on Wednesday Afternoon.  I've got no other alternative, though.  So I got that going for me.  Democrats won a bunch yesterday!  My take away from this, I think the one thing we can deduce from this is  Now Virginia And New Jersey Have Democrat Governors.  That's my hot take.
    Cool beans.  What else is going on.  Second entry and whatnot.  I like how it's a big deal with Russia influencing our election, but when people who give robocalls to Democrats telling them their polling place has changed, or targeting them on social media saying they could vote from home by texting a number, that's okay, and no one is going to jail for that.  #USA!  We like our election cons and interference home grown.  Just like our terrorists!  Anyway, jeez.  Gotta get less political.  I guess.  Still have my show scheduled for December 28th.  They haven't cancelled it or anything!  Music has been great this year.  Made half a dozen people pay me some respect.  I'm on board with being respected.  It's new to me, that's for sure, and it's wonderful.
    Third paragraph.  Roy Halladay died.  Let's pray that Heaven is a never-ending Halladay.  Gotta pray for something.  Not sure what to do for dinner tonight.  My options are wide open.  Up two and a half dollars in poker.  Knockin' it out of the park.  Which I believe is a kick ball reference.  May get a new TV for Birthday/Chanukah.  That's the opposite direction my life should go.  I should be getting a new Wall.  Which is on the opposite side of my room.  See what I did there?  Cause I don't.  Not 100%, at least.  Anyway, what the what.  I got a robocall yesterday that I could write an entry by texting a number.  Got jipped out of that.  No entry yesterday.
    Fourth paragraph.  Whatta clunker.  What else is going on.  I hope I never have to learn Freecell.  That's my main goal in life.  Not learning solitary card games.  Except the one I already know.  Solitaire.  I don't know why.  Probably because it's the fourth paragraph.  I could get a chicken dinner.  I can get a turkey dinner.  I could get some sort of pasta contraction.  Many things to think about.  I wonder if there's ever gonna be a moment, where a bunch of people are watching Fox News about something, and they all collectively go, "...Wait a minute...  You've been insulting our intelligence!"  Figure something'll be the tipping point eventually.
    I insult my own intelligence and leave it at that.  I don't need to have self-esteem.  I got half a dozen people to worry about that for me!  Anyway, what the what.  Trump having people look into Democrat collusion with Russia even though everyone says there is none.  He's insulting our intelligence!... community.  Also, just our regular intelligence.  I don't know, crap and crap, fifth paragraph.  This entry sure is a real D+.  I can dig it.  Everyone asking, about the election, what does this mean for 2018, what does it mean for 2020, what does it mean for... and so on.  I can tell you what it means for sure!  It means there are now Democratic Governors in Virginia and New Jersey.  And think about all the implications that has immediately.  Because that's what it is.
    Pundit job, please.  Sixth paragraph.  Hah.  Pun'd it.  I've said that before!  I'll say it again!  Most likely, at least.  I don't know.  Whatta do with my weekend.  Got some Bleak House Reading, some AAL Reading.  That should take three or four hours.  Coolbeans.  That's when you get a cold brew iced coffee.  WOW!  Jeez.  Pretty much before every class ever, I get there early, and get paranoid class was cancelled.  It happened once so my suspicions are justified for infinity.  Anyway.  Tomorrow will be 5 weeks before I brought in Guitar to get fixed.  They said 2-3 weeks.  I'm starting to get angry!!!  No I'm not.  Pretty mellow about the whole deal.  So I got that going for me.
    Seventh paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Anyway.  My inclination is, in dinner situations such as these, my recent history is, fuck it, just get veal parmesan.  I'll eat some side pasta like a Chump, I don't care.  Whatevers.  One negative aspect of asking teachers stuff after class is, I just wanna ask it, quick answer, then everybody goes home happy.  They start giving an in depth answer, everyone else is leaving the room, I'm standing there nodding my head off indefinitely.  The lesson is don't pursue knowledge for some reason.
Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Sounds like a repeat of last paragraph.  Except different numbers.  Cool!  Anyway.  It's way too warm in my houseplace that I live in.  Opened my windows and everything, still too warm.  Plus, my computer is heating up.  Resting my wrists on the keyboard surface as I type, and my wrists are even hotter than me!  Someone figure out a solution!  What else.  Gotta think of some new titles for potential future album, which I can downgrade to song titles.  If they're good enough album titles, they're good enough song titles.  And downgrade song titles to lyrics.  If they're good enough song titles, they're good enough lyrics.  I've learnt a lot from making music.
Like, those two things.  Jeez.  The point is music is all about titles.  It's like life, in that way.  I guess.  I had an idea for an album, where I just randomize the titles for the songs.  Each song has an appropriate title, but when releasing the album, just mix-em-up.  It comes from experience of downloading music and the song titles being mixed up.  But this'd be on purpose!  I'm a visionary.  Music is all about vision.  It's like life, in that way.  I see.  Exactly!  That's what I'm talkin' about.
    10th paragraph.  Down to only being up 1 and a half dollars.  I blame making a 50 cent call with the worst hand just now.  That's the logical thing to do.  At least, 50 cents of that.  Anyway.  Constitutional Convention was voted down.  That's good for me.  They could have done that, and changed my Dad's pension.  And I need his pension to live on!  I ain't got no job.  What else is going on.  Back to being up 2 and a half dollars!  I got that going on and crap.  I guess I'm aiming for 20 paragraphs here, seems like it.  Anyway.  Paragraphs are good.  Most people write three, four paragraphs a week, tops.  I'm doin' 60, 70 a week.  That's exponentially more paragraphs!
    I wanna start using exponentially whenever I talk about numbers, as a goof.  I know I have in the past, but I wanna do it every entry.  And you can't argue with a feeling.  Anyway, 11th paragraph.  That's exponentially more than the last paragraph!  See, that sort of crap.  Makes me happy.  I don't know.  Exponentially more happy.  Don't over do it.  Yes, boss!  I'm the boss of me.  I'm also the subservient of me.  That's logic, that's all.  I got 10 paragraphs to make me happy!  What else.  I might need to take into account Time when ordering food.  Some places may not deliver past 8, 9 o' clock.  And I'd be happiest ordering around 8, is how I feel as of now.
    The point is Haha Made you read it.  Whatta prankster I am.  There was a year or two a while back where I was still really sick and confused, and I wrote/recorded an album of music a day.  And wrote is an extremely, exponentially strong word.  Music is an extremely strong word.  I just played a few discordant chords and some terrible lyrics, at least to my memory.  But maybe that was an important step on my songwriting journey.  The chickens are coming home to roost.  Not 100% what that means, but I'm 60-70% sure I'm using it incorrectly.  What else is going on.
    13th paragraph.  I don't want this entry to ever end!  Until I do.  Then I want it to end.  And everyone goes home happy with a D+ entry in the books.  Jeez.  Essentially, every day I did the music equivalent of thisHard to even fathom the greatness that was once produced.  I mean, when it's Blog, it's got it's charm, it means nothing, but hey, life means nothing.  When it's music, man is this nothing.  That's how my life has gone so far.  I gotta admit, I'm kinda into Bleak House.  I still dread having to read it, and when I'm reading it, I just keep track of how much more I have to read.  But it's not all that bad.  Good enough, that's my take.
    The point is it turns out Charles Dickens isn't a complete fraud.  Jeez, anyway.  Did Charles Dickens write this as he was going, or have it planned out in advance.  I feel like someone told me recently but I can't remember.  Anyway, what the what.  I could go the Pizza + Beef Patty route.  Lots of routes I can go.  Route 66.  I could get my kicks on that route, is what I've been led to believe.  Anyway.  I felt bad about not voting yesterday in the evening before the results were in.  Then my Dad reminded me polls close at 9 PM.  And I was like, C'mon, I don't feel that guilty.  But it turns out we won any important thing I woulda voted.  So that's good.
    15th paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Twitter is now 280 characters.  Terrible idea.  They'll live to see the chickens come home to roost, is my guess.  I'm not even 100% sure what Roost means.  Point is get off my back about it.  Crap and crap!  I don't know.  Gonna pour myself some snapple brb.  Back'n'stuff.  That's how that goes.  Hey, I'm up to the 15th paragraph!  I remember an hour ago when I didn't even have paragraph 1.  Maybe I did.  Started around then.  Who knows for sure.  Gotta start keeping track of the time for each paragraph.  It's important, because time increases exponentially.
    Jeez, what the what.  I'm still waiting for the Celebration Day when UberEats will deliver McDonalds to me.  Only a matter of time.  Anyway, jeez.  16th paragraph.  Feels like maybe go over 20, but we'll cross that bridge when we get there.  Can't cross a bridge before you get there.  Not sure why that's an expression at all.  Got no choice in the matter.  Also, if you could burn a bridge... wasn't that great a bridge in the first place.  That's my hot take on things.  I hope Heaven isn't a Never-ending Holiday.  I'ma wanna go home at some point.  My hot take.  Crap and crap.
    Aiming for 25, as of now, makes me happy.  I'ma continue with that mindset potentially.  Someone was eating soup next to me in Class and I was like, you know what?  this soup?  I'm on board with how this soup smells.  Was waiting for her to apologize to me, sorry about the soup, because I was ready to say, no apology needed!  I'm diggin' this smell!  Never happened.  Anyway, 17th paragraph.  Man, Twitter did a complete 280o on is.  That's my hot take on things.  Does this mean they will make all previous tweets the same thing over again?  So each tweet would be the same thing twice.  You know, so we don't get confused?
    What else.  I have a suspicion they did it because they thought Trump would be like, 280 characters?  I'm not qualified to write four sentences!!!  My guess?  No.  Hot take.  Lost 50 cents in poker.  I blame Twitter and/or Trump and/or characters.  Also, the number 280.  Which is a real exponential number, if I dare say so myself.  Jeez.  Runnin' good ideas into the ground.  Like a Baseball Manager overusing relief pitchers, that's my analogy.  Crap and crap.  I wanna grow up to be a Twitter Bot!  Sounds great.  Anyway.  What paragraph we at.  18.  Cool.
    19!  7 more seems right to me.  And you can't argue with a feeling.  Not successfully, at least.  E-mailed AAL professor about upcoming homework, started it Sorry to disturb you, his response started with, Michael-- you're not disturbing me.  Story of my life!  Now I Know we're best friends.  Jeez.  It's always been my dream to not be disturbing people.  That's my hot take.  Crap and crap.  Gillepsie didn't embrace Trump enough, according to him.  The point is, Trump better invest in a fleet of busses.  So he could throw people under 'em!  Hot take.  Anyway, jeez.  Only one more Short Cigarette from pack I had to get at gas station.  It's all Longer Cigarettes from here on out!  Living the dream and what not.
    20th paragraph.  Cool.  Throwing people under busses is pretty violent.  That's my... take.  I don't know.  My Dinner Options are wide open.  There's no excuse for choosing a mediocre option.  Now's the time to knock it out of the park.  Gonna see a Politics/Comedy Podcast live next week with Brother.  Never listened to it, but I did some research, and it sounds pretty great.  Also, what else is going on.  Absolutely Zero urinating on carpets for the last week or two.  I had some growing up to do, and I did it!  Now I'm an Adult.  Jeez.  What else.  AA IN BB BRB.  WON 15C BACK.
    21st paragraph!  I can't believe it.  I'm pretty easily surprised by what paragraph I'm up to.  Hot take.  Anyway.  Excited to see who I will be playing shows with during my show.  You know, who goes on before, who goes on after.  Potential New Best Friends to be made, is how I feel.  Also, their audience might bleed into mine.  That's how you make best friends, on the real.  I don't know.  I wonder if whoever runs the Sidewalk Coffee website notices an extreme uptick in views of the Calendar HTML whenever I'm listed on it.  Because I'm checking that shit every 2 hours.  Love to see my name up on there.
    22nd paragraph.  Probably.  What else.  Two sources, too.  Checkin' on my phone, and checkin' on my computer.  Cool beans.  Hey, probably four paragraphs to go.  Or more.  That's my... take. May pour myself Snapple soon.  Gotta stay hydrated.  Gonna do one more round in poker.  Next to next time I get the BB, I'ma sit out, pour myself some snapple.  It's good to set short term goals.  Probably.  Maybe even do it this BB.  Feelin' pretty dehydrated.  What else and crap.  I don't know.  Make Facebook Event for Music Show around very beginning of December.  Send it over to the Sidewalk Coffee Facebook Page, so any of those half a dozen people that like me will see it, and be like, Thursday Night Mike?  Gotta catch me some of that.
    23rd paragraph.  Wow!  I like calling them Sidewalk Coffee instead of Sidewalk Cafe because it decreases the chance someone will google them and find this page.  I don't need this nonsense corrupting people's respect for me.  Or do I.  They could Double Respect me, potentially.  I can't even imagine.  That would be Dream Come True territory.  Anyway.  60 second break coming up soon.  I can't wait.  I'ma re-hydrate and everything.  So, to summarize:  two ways my dreams can come true.  1) People respect me for music and comedy.  2)AAL professor becomes my new best friend.  Hot take.  Argue with a feeling.  Can't!  Anyway, BRB.  Starting to think seriously about pizza + beef patty.  BACK.
    24th paragraph.  I guess.  Still up about 2.5 dollars in poker.  Got that going for me.  Anyway.  Wednesday.  Got the weekend off, got the back end of the regular week off.  Really knockin' some life out of the park.  Crap and crap.  May watch some Curb tonight with Mom.  A+ #1 Son.  We watch Comedy together.  What more can a mother ask for from a son?  We ain't gonna watch Drama together, that's for sure.  Get that out of your head right now.  I saw Jimmy Fallon's mother died.  Whatta jip.  If it can happen to him, it can happen to anybody.  Thoughts and prayers.  Do I dare aim for 30 paragraphs?!?!
I'll take it paragraph by paragraph at this point.  My Mom is pretty much 100% as of now.  Think she's even off the percocet.  Why she'd stop taking it, I don't know.  You give me percocet, I'm goin' for the opiod addiction, full stop.  Already pot committed to the whole thing after taking it as prescribed for a week.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Up 3 dollars now.  I don't believe it.  I gotta keep writing here, though.  I stop writing here, back to My Life.  My Life ain't that great.  In Crazysheet, anything is possible.  In Life, nothing is possible.  Whatta jip, is the point.  Crap and crap.
    Five paragraphs to go! I can do that hardcore and knock it to the deepest part of parks.  I don't know.  Gotta stop at some point.  The point is What Else And Crap.  I have 14 dollars overall on poker.  Wow.  That's how I feel.  Can stop this entry at any point.  Maybe if I get enthusiastic about a certain dinner, that'll inspire me to stop writing and get it.  Seems like a likely scenario.  Anyway, what else.  As long as I'm writing here, might as well make it readable.  That sounds hard.  I should stop soon.  Maybe one more paragraph.
Cool!  27 is a number.  I got nothin' against it.  9 x 3, I'm on board with that.  3 to the 3rd.  I don't believe it.  Havin' the last of the mini-cigarettes.  I got that going for me.  Hmm.  Maybe should get Veal Parmesan.  I'll take the easy way out all over the place.  What else.  Hmm.  Have I fully considered the possibility of Egg.  No, I haven't!  And, to be honest, I don't want to.  Who needs Egg.  I'll see ya later.

-7:10 P.M.


Monday, November 6, 2017

No More Titles!, or:  Fiction Is Scary!

      There's a title.  What does it mean.  Probably nothing.  Anyway.  Monday School Break.  Teacher loved my bibliography.  She's on board with a solid 2 out of my 3 potential sources.  It's though to be a dwarf!  It's the only disability where people are angry at you for being sensitive about it and essentially the negative social impacts of it are your fault.  Also, one of my favorite lines I've ever written is about Shrek--  "It shows it doesn't matter how ugly you are, you can still get the girl.  Unless you're short.  Then you're an asshole.  And fuck you."  I'm proud of weird things.
    Hey, set up my next Music Show!  December 28th, a Thursday at 7:00 PM.  I'ma knock some music out of the park.  Typical Napoleon Complex, he wants to be good at things.  Cool.  Anyway.  Church Shooting.  Don't worry, though-- our politicians are sending their thoughts and prayers.  Problem solved.  Remember in World War I and II when we sent our thoughts and prayers to the British and they defeated the Germans?  Problem solved.  Probably should have comes up with a nonviolent parallel.  Oh well, live and learn.  That's my version of, "Thoughts and Prayers."  Live and learn.  And it's implied there will be no learning.  So I got that going for me.
    No Academic Discussion tonight.  Instead, we're watching a Horror Movie.  Terrifying.  Maybe get something to eat in a little bit.  Lost a full pack of cigarettes running to catch the bus today.  Maybe it'll still be on the sidewalk on my way home.  It can't hurt to dream.  What else.  Starting to mentally put together Final Disability Paper.  Still got no idea about AAL Final Paper.  What else.  Still got money on Poker.  I'm talkin' Nine Dollars and a quarter roughly.  That's a lotta quarters.  Anyway.  Hopefully I can get at least 2 or 3 people to show up at Upcoming Show.  That'd be swell.
    Fourth Paragraph!  What's the point.  Had an extra hour to waste this weekend.  It's about time!  It sure is.  Jeez.  Maybe smoke a cigarette after next paragraph.  I bought a pack at the gas station.  With credit.  From a card!  I don't have all the details how that works.  Maybe after this paragraph.  I can't wait!  Jeez.  Whatta snooze.  Gonna cigarette break now.  I'm back.  Saw a sign on a Queens College building that said, "Study Abroad -- Room 203."  That doesn't sound abroad.  Sounds pretty close, if you ask me.  Also, I need to talk about dwarfism, not regular short stature.  I can use my experience as a jumping off point but its not the same thing.
    Fifth paragraph.  Have food at home, not eating right now.  That settles that.  If only priests had gattling guns, we wouldn't be in the trouble we're in today.  "Modern air is a little too clean for optimum health"-- New advisor for the EPA.  Really.  Possibly one of the stupidest things I've ver heard.  And I've heard me say stuff!  A lot!  Anyway, what the what.  Still the fifth paragraph.  Looking forward to tonight.  Poker, food, beer, and finishing the entry.  Sounds like a blast to me.  I think we should force Ben Carson to become a superhero.  Because of something he said 2 years ago.  I don't have all the details.
    Sixth Paragraph!  I don't believe it.  I'll be able to do at least one and possibly two open mics in December in advance of my show.  Unbelievable.  Great.  Maybe I got confused and we're actually having Academic Discussion tonight.  It can't hurt to dream.  Unless you fall off the bed or something.  Ouch.  It's dark outside.  I don't believe it.  Don't wanna leave Cafeteria for another half hour.  That's great, just great.  No school tomorrow.  Ahead of reading Bleak House.  Whatta jip.  I guess.  If there's a smoke break tonight, the pack of Newports I got are short, so I wouldn't be able to smoke with my classmates and New Best Friend (Professor) to the greatest extent possible.  Some kids are singing on the opposite end of the cafeteria.  Have they no shame.
Anyway, here's a website, internet!  Seventh paragraph.  Gotta do at least one more paragraph here.  Good.  20 minutes until I want to get up.  What else is going on.  Probably nothing.  To L.A., wonks know a lot.  Job, please.  Jeez.  Overheard at table next to me-- "...They're way better than Kosher nachos."  That settles that.  Cafeteria feels more empty with it being dark outside.  Like, it's about time we all got going home.  That sort of crap.  15 minutes until I can get up!  I figure one more paragraph should do it for now.
    And that'll be the eighth paragraph.  Lotta controversy with the DNC.  My official position is I Don't Know.  Not sure why I need an official position.  Seems not quite right.  Jeez.  Get to walk to class in the dark, and walk home in the dark.  That's a lot of walking.  It's not quite, "Room 203" far, but it's still a substantial amount of dark walking.  Movie is 104 minutes long.  Maybe time for some Academic Discussion afterwards!  Or beforewards.  Probably not concurrently, though.  I'm comfortable making that prediction.  8 minutes until I get up.  Anyway.  Few more sentences here.  Ehh.  This is hard.  I'm done here.  Later.
    I Am Home Now.  I used Bold and Italics to drive this important point home-- as in, where I am now.  Remember, it had italics and bold?  Anyway.  Get Out was scary.  Scared me.  I was gonna say It spooked me good.  And then used italics, wait, let me start over, but thinking about that on my way home, I realized there's very little separating me saying that for humor and, let's say, an 'alt-light' person using it.  It's the same thing either way.  So the point is no more insensitivity.  I saw a movie about it and now I've learned once and for all.  That movie wasn't about it.  Fine, whatever.  What's going on.  Ninth paragraph and crap.  I am home now, that prediction was correct.  I am drinking a beer, smoking a cigarette, playing poker.  All true facts. 
    Haven't eaten yet, though.  All day!  I don't believe it.  Typing the first 8 paragraphs, I just kept thinking, c'mon readers, we'll get through this, the future of the entry is still unwritten!  Unless if you believe in pre-destiny and/or fate.  Then, fine it's been written.  Congratulations.  I believe in The Twilight Zone.  Prove me wrong!  Don't know what that means.  At least I've already seen Split and Get Out.  Pretty sure those are the last of the horror movies.  It's all Will Ferrell Comedies from here on out!  Talk about a blast from the past.  Another movie.  I don't know what I'm talking about.
    Eleventh paragraph!  The food I have is General Tso's chicken.  Well, it's my chicken now.  But he invented it.  And pork fried rice.  Which is like rice, only fried in pork.  And that's about it.  Jeez.  I'm gonna still be residually scared from Get Out for at least another 24 or 48 hours.  Stupid movies, making me feel things.  I didn't sign up for feeling things!  Anyway, jeez.  Get Out and Split are both appropriate directions for what to do when the movie is over.  I smell collusion.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Gonna have to put food on a plate to microwave it, like a chump. 
    12th paragraph.  So far, improved entry from a D to a D+ with these new paragraphs.  I don't believe it.  Been playing some Solitaire lately.  I don't mean to brag but I win sometimes.  Against an enemy as old as time-- playing cards.  Sure.  See, the strategy is get them aces up there, then add cards to the ace piles.  Cracked that code.  Also, you should be able to start new lines of solitaire with jacks or queens.  That's how I feel at least.  Just a suggestion.  There should be a guy who plays solitaire with real life playing cards, and he just keeps cheating, and he laughs himself silly.
    Just described my life.  Man Am I Getting Away With Something!  Love it.  What else is crap.  Elections are tomorrow.  I'm just gonna go in with the assumption that The Bad Guys Will Win.  They've got a pretty good track record, that's been my experience of late.  13th paragraph.  Guess 20 is within reach, then time to re-evaluate.  Like that car commercial.  I think the point of that car commercial is let your car make your life decisions for you.  Makes sense to me.  Teacher insisted that Spontaneous Combustion is a real thing.  Pretty sure it's not.  Oh well, live and learn.
    Crap and crap.  At least I get to eat soon.  That's not scary.  What else.  On the Sidewalk Coffee Calendar Website, they updated their description of my from "Alt/ Indie-Rock" to "Alt/ Indie-Rock/Singer Songwriter."  Wow!  Someone's been paying attention to my social media posts.  Except now I disown it.  Not much singersongwritering.  Oh well, can't win every battle.  Jeez.  14th paragraph and whatnot.  Singer songwriter stuff is like Hey it's the color blue, let's have a party, do it on time because you know I'm never tardy.  Alt/Indie-Rock is more like, I got fun things to say, then I'm gonna say 'em, i'm gonna be earning my keep so much i'll need a per diem.
    Ok.  Got a good title to keep in mind for possible album title of next round of music.  Probably won't use it, but it's good to keep in my mind for context.  That sort of crap.  The point is it turns out I know Latin.  Never woulda guessed.  Anyway.  Just had a Kit Kat break.  Man these commercials have got me trained good.  That's no good.  I'm a slave to Big Candy.  The point is the only way to cure myself is to write nonsense on a regular basis.  What else is going on.  I'm digging having my show on a Thursday Night.  It's like, hey, is it the weekend yet, i don't know, it's pretty close, let's go listen to Mike and see if that helps us.  Sounds good to me.
    16th paragraph!  I thought "Get Out" was gonna be about Elaine from Seinfeld pushing people in disbelief.  Boy was I wrong.  Anyway.  Five paragraphs to go.  Or more.  Not sure.  Rice is one of my least favorite things to eat the next day.  Live and learn.  Crap and crap.  Basically just need to come up with an idea for AAL Paper and then I'm ready to finish semester/hopefully graduate.  Then, who knows.  Not me.  I'm pretty sure the Bus purposely got there at that time so I would lose my cigarettes.  Only logical explanation.  What else.  Four paragraphs to go.  I can do that.
    What else.  Man, I gotta write 4 more paragraphs!  Doesn't sound right.  Pretty sure I never have to watch another Horror Movie as long as I live.  Fiction is scary.  Specially when it makes us think of nonfiction.  Because that would mean reality is scary.  Which is an idea I'm not 100% ready to get behind.  I can make this the last paragraph.  Being scared throws the rule book out of the window.  That's how I feel.  I don't know, crap and crap.  I'll see ya later.

-10:55 P.M.


Thursday, November 2, 2017

Let's Title Or Something

      Gonna try to write an entry.  Not Pot Committed yet, so we'll see.  Today is Thursday.  No class or anything today!  What else.  Baseball is over.  The Good Guys Won.  That's my opinion on things.  This isn't going well at all.  Up 1.28 dollars in poker today so far.  Anyway.  Started a can of beer.  That should motivate me to write some paragraphs.  I don't know.  Let's see, what's going on in life.  That's good stuff to talk about.  Open Mic on Saturday hopefully.  Probably won't go, but it would be good if I did.  Reading Bleak House a little bit.  Maybe get started on AAL Paper-- that would be an Adult Move.  Gotta figure out what to write about.  Gotta figure that out first, too.  Before I start writing.  Hmm, I could start writing, and see what happens.  See, this paragraph is already paying off! 
    What else.  Start writing right now.  Here we go.

    There's been a lot of talk lately about African American Literature in the so-called "Post Racial" Era.  I've been reading up on some of these books.  For a class-- you know which one.  This one!  Anyway, some of the books were pretty good.  A couple of them were boring.  A guy wrote one of them whose been in the media a lot lately.  That was a good book.  I should write about that.  Still, though, there were other books.  One of them was a Humor Novel.  Get a load of that!

    This isn't going well at all.  I'll try again later in the entry. I guess this counts as the third paragraph.  Whatta wonderful world.  Startin' to get the juices flowing, though.  I knew this entry would pay off.  Actually, I didn't.  Frankly, I'm surprised I got to the third paragraph.  What the what.  Maybe I should treat this like the Fabled Philosophy Final that asked Why? and to get an A you'd have to answer Why Not? and that's it.  For my 20 page paper, I should just write, I Don't Know, I'm White.  That settles that.
    Fourth paragraph.  Just lost 6 dollars.  Oh well, live and learn.  At least I'm up to the fourth paragraph.  Birthday is in less than 6 weeks.  Probably can put up 50 dollars then in poker.  If I feel like it.  Anyway, what the what.

    I've been reading books for this class.  Stands to reason I'm able to talk about them at this point.  First book we read was Between The World And Me.  This was a good book.  Talked about his experience as a black man and when he was a kid and then when he was a young adult-- leading up to the exciting climax where he's a black man.  I get a little bit what it was like.  His parents used corporal punishment, which apparently is common in black families.  Maybe that's something I could talk about.  Hmm.  I've given me a lot to think about.

    Fifth paragraph.  Anyway.  Trying to think if other books talked about corporal punishment.  That would help.  Probably should pick a topic that's more about the Literaryness than the black experience.  It is an English Class and whatnot.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Maury and other shows in that channel 11 block similar to Maury have the best commercials.  Good jingles for calling debt consolidators or personal injury lawyers or cars for kids.  Lots of good stuff in that block of TV.  Anyway, crap and crap.
    Sixth paragraph.  It's goin' ok.  Not good, really, not at all.  But okay.  Bought a new bottle of alcohol yesterday.  Told my parents about it.  A+ Number 1 Son.  Turn 29 in six weeks.  Pretty sure that's a prime number.  Hmm.  2?  No, doesn't go into it.  3?  Nope.  5?  Get real.  Seven?  Not a chance.  9?  Fuck no.  11? hahah.  Not 13, either.  That covers that.  I remember once in 7th grade our teacher had a birthday and said it was a prime number and I figured it out and he gave me his clothes and I became the teacher.  Anyway, what else is going on.
    Seventh paragraph.  What the what.  A few episodes behind on The Mick.  One episode behind on White Famous.  Few episodes behind on The Simpsons.  Think that's it.  Still have the Daily Show I recorded with the writer of Between The World And Me which I mentioned in my introductory paragraph of my paper.  Hmm, does that mean I can write 20 pages about the Daily Show?  Because of the transitive property and whatnot.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I don't know.  Started watching The Deer Hunter last night.  Saw the part where they hunted the deer then got bored and went to sleep.  Finish it tonight I guess.  What else is going on.
    Eighth paragraph.  I figure I gotta go for at least 20, right?  That's my track record I'm pot-committed to.  I wonder, after winning the world series, how many players on the Astros 25 man roster went, Hmm, this doesn't really matter at all.  What difference does it make.  Probably 8-10, that's my guess.  I figure, you make the playoffs, maybe not counting the wild card game, you won.  You get to play in the playoffs.  Especially at Game 7 of the World Series.  You made it as far as you could go.  You're not gonna play any more games whether you win or lose.  It makes no difference.
    Baseball.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I was rooting for the Astros, but when they won, I was like, they don't give a fig about me being happy for them.  This is for Houston.  They could care less about me!  So that ruined everything.  Ninth paragraph.  I could get away with doing a 10 paragraph entry.  It's a non-class today, special occasion.  Pot Commission is thrown out the window.  Gonna either have a Chicken Pot Pie or 2 hot dogs and half a potato pancake for dinner tonight.  With the other being for dinner tomorrow night.  Great!  I don't know.  What the Hell do they make the Chicken Pot Pie filler out of.  My guess is it's not healthy.  Probably has fat in it or something.
    Anyway, jeez, tenth paragraph.  That's something great.  I didn't know I'd be able to get here when I first started.  Plus, still got some money on poker.  Playing with my entire bankroll at the table, sure, but if I double up, I'm more or less back to where I started.  And if I lose enough, but not all of it, I can go back down to the lower limit and potentially build it up again.  So yeah I'd say My Life Is Going Great.  I wanna talk about my experience as a White Guy in my paper.  Can't be How I Learned Not To Be Racist but I feel I can write some of the 20 pages about my stupid perspective.
    It's important!  Because I'm White!  Anyway, crap and crap.  Ten paragraphs to go and whatnot, I guess.  Added a new quote to my Facebook Quotes page.  This is Moleman in the morning.  Good Moleman to you.  Hmm, should capitalize 'In the morning.'  Good thing I figured that out.  What else.  Decent chance I'll be Busto in poker by the end of this entry.  What else is going on.  Busto.  Man that lingo makes me feel I'm on the Cutting Edge of Cool.  I guess.  Anyway, 11th paragraph still.  I got that going for me.  Apparently Meryl Streep has been nominated for 20 Oscars.  I haven't even been in twenty movies!  Unbelievable.  What else is going on.
    12th paragraph.  Jeez.  I like the tax plan.  It's rich people going, Hmm, you know who could use more money?  Us!  Wonderful.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Why does Jerry Springer always have to have the final word.  Whatta jerk.  Anyway, huh?  I don't know.  Crap and crap.  Maybe something about having dual audiences with these books.  Both African American and White.  See, this is how African Americans read the bo-- wait, I'm white.  Lemme amend that.  This is how white people assume African Americans read the book...  Sounds good to me. 
    13th paragraph.  I don't know.  Eight paragraphs to go.  That's a lot of paragraph.  Jeez.  John Kelly thinks we should have compromised to avoid the civil war.  In other words, John Kelly thinks, you know, the confederacy had some pretty good ideas.  This is the guy that's supposed to be the voice of reason to Trump.  Whatta jip.  On the one hand, the tax cuts would increase the debt by, I think, a trillion and a half dollars.  On the other hand, I want more money.  Quite a conundrum.  What else is going on.
    Seven paragraphs to go!  I don't believe it!  And I get to feel real good about myself afterwards.  Contributing to society and whatnot.  Maybe Chicken Pot Pie tonight.  I'm a big fan of savory pies.  Apple pie can go fuck itself, but you put some meat in a pie, I'm there.  Anyway, huh.  I bet Don McLean was invested in some culinary start-up and wanted to get people on board with American Pies.  Only logical explanation when you really think about it.  I wonder if American Pie is friends with We Didn't Start The Fire.  That's the kind of crap I put up on the internet for some reason.
    15th paragraph!  Wow!  Maybe this is the last paragraph.  I'll see how it goes.  Vietnam isn't gonna traumatize itself.  What else is going on.  We're spending 250 million a day on the war on terror.  That's a good use of money on something the military can do nothing to stop in the first place.  Anyway, jeez.  This'll be the last paragraph.  Still gotta finish it, though.  That's how that goes.  Eh, I'll see ya later.

-4:32 P.M.


Wednesday, November 1, 2017

I Need To Title To You, or:  Post Title Stress Disorder

      But also, Hello.  I was walking by an old lady on my way home from School and I realized I like the way Old People Smell.  Can't argue with that.  The point is Great.  Doin' my Disabilities Final Essay on The Station Agent and Dwarfism and whatnot.  I'll knock that crap out of the park and whatnot.  I just won 4 dollars in poker with AA vs KK.  I don't believe it.  I have over 10 dollars now.  Never even heard of that amount of things.  And the things is money to boot!  Which is an expression.  Ya learn something every entry.  Anyway, what the what.  Brought home Halal Food.  Save that for later. 
    That.  Learn somethin' new.  Anyway, crap and crap!  WSG7 is tonight.  I'm rooting for both teams to have fun.  Anyway, I don't know.  There was an Academic Article on The Station Agent I found in the Databases.  So that settles that!  Crap and crap.  Not only do I have more than 10 dollars, I have more than twelve dollars.  Somebody Alert The Presses.  They need to know there's a manchild in Bayside Queens who has Over Twelve Dollars!  Anyway, jeez.  Mom is okay now, though.  Stress that.  Saw my Doctor/Therapist today.  Knocked on his door when Appointment was supposed to start.  He came out a few minutes later and was PISSED.  How dare I knock on his door.  He was doing important stuff.  Which I can only assume was an early-morning-in-office masturbation.  Otherwise, what's his problem.
    So now I know not to knock on doors.  Learn somethin' new every damn day.  Can't wait for this World Series to be over.  I need to take a Chill Pill after every one of these games.  The point is Hey It's The Weekend.  Maybe do Saturday Open Mic.  Seems like a worthwhile venture.  Terrorist Automobile attack yesterday.  Glad that I'm pretty sure no one from Stuy was hurt.  I place more importance on their lives than other peoples, is the point.  Because I used to be what they is now.  I take solace in the fact that, they're gonna be interviewing kids about it, that it's Stuy High.  Because they're gonna have some well reasoned apropos shit to say about this.  You just watch!
    Anyway.  I don't know.  I'm guessing the school bus the guy hit was for Disabled Kids.  Because, to my memory, Stuy didn't have a school bus.  So, if they did, it was probably only for disabled kids.  That's my guess.  Or it was a school bus from another school.  Finally the pieces are starting to come together.  You know what, I think the School Bus was in on it.  I don't trust this school bus at all.  Gonna eat Halal Food All Over The Place.  Like an American.  Anyway, huh.  Fourth Paragraph.  These Kids Know Pre-Calculus, they're gonna be alright.  Don't worry about them.  Jeez.  Pretty much Pot Committed to writing about Dwarfism and how it's portrayed in Literature and/or Media.  Great stuff.  Gets me into my head where I remember Oh Yeah, I'm Really Short, This Is Partly About Me which is important, because if I don't think about my height intensely all the time, who will?
    Yep.  I don't know, fifth paragraph.  What other kinds of Baseball Games are on tonight.  I don't know.  Maybe I can also write about Dwarfism for my AAL class, and write 20 pages about one of the opening scenes in Me, Myself, and Irene about the Limo Driver.  And compare it to talking about Bad Santa where the same actor played Billy Bob Thornton's Partner In Crime.  That's something worth thinking about.  An Analysis Of Tony Cox.  I think I need to use one of the books we read, though.  I don't think he wrote even one of these books.  Oh well, live and learn.  What, still the fifth paragraph?  Great, just great.
    I Don't Know.  Apparently they're looking for another person in connection to the Car Attack.  I bet it was one of the Stuy students, look into them.  Whatta sellout.  Tired of these cars attacking people of their own free will.  That's my take on the matter.  Anyway, crap and crap.  He was a big Uber guy, this terrorist.  Now we know why.  Practicin' his driving skills until he was proficient at potentially running people over.  Cracked that code.  Anyway, what else.  #YesAllUbers.  Sorry.  This entry is the pits.  The good news is It Will Be Over At Some Point.  And then what.  I got nothin' goin' on!  Whatta jip.  Can think about going to Open Mic on Saturday.  That'll take up some time.  Hmm, gonna play two songs.  I know one maybe.  Other one?  Hmm need some time with this.
What a waste of time.  Seventh Paragraph.  The point is Yes People Are Dead but i have more than 12 dollars.  Hmm.  Maybe Post Title Stress Disorder is realer than I thought.  Oh well.  Gotta cure myself of this before the entry is over.  If not, what kind of example am I setting for Today's Youth?  To succumb to post title stress disorder?  Not On My Watch.  I used to wear a watch in high school.  OH NO KIDS TRAUMATIZED FOREVER.  Jeez.  Don't underestimate these kids.  They know pre-calculus and the popular ones come together with their grade to write a musical every year!  They got this. 
    I once started writing a play for Sing! that was essentially a rip off of the South Park Movie (and I, somehow, didn't make the connection at the time) about the Iraq War instead of Canada.  I wrote some amount of pages and never finished because these people don't know who I am.  That settles that.  I also once took a Video Production Class with other students in it.  Ahhh, high school.  I don't know, crap and crap.  It turns out I have a history of writing things that are complete rip offs of other things without making the connection.  Like that, and a couple of lyrics of Rap that were Eminem when I was in seventh grade.  History.  I'd venture to guess there was a third thing somewhere along the way.  Anyway.
    Ninth paragraph.  I think it would be really interesting if there was a sophomore in Stuyvesant who has an idea to write his own blog-website called crazysheet because he had no real social connections in the high school in real life.  It would be a real case of life imitating life imitating life which was imitating art.  Anyway, jeez.  Crap and crap.  Crazysheet, you're my best friend.  Not looking forward to Hell, though.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I don't get why some Heavy-Metal Musicians are friends with the devil.  He doesn't care about you!  He's not gonna show any loyalty to you in the after life.  You're only making things harder on yourself.  Where's the logic in that.
    Tenth Paragraph?  Yep.  Maybe some Heavy Metal Musicians don't believe in religion or the after life.  HUH?  WHA?  I didn't even know that was an option.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I guess potentially 11 more paragraphs.  Whatta jip.  Shold be nice and hungry for Halal Food by the time that's over, though.  So that's the opposite of a jip.  It's a pij.  Whatta Clunker.  Anyway.  I'm a big fan of Jpegs.  Way better than Pngs.  And don't even get me started on Gifs.  What else is going on.  Jeez.  I also used to live near there by Stuy for my second semester of sophomore year.  College, that is.  Not the semester in high school I started writing at crazysheet.
    The point is Everything Relates To Me.  Larry David on SNL this weekend.  Miley Cyrus performing her music.  Sounds like a real 1-2 knockout punch.  Emimem is musical guest in a few weeks.  Does that mean we can expect new music from Eminem?  I hope so.  He raps with words that I can really get behind.  Anyway, what the what.  11th paragraph.  Whatta Not-Quite-Completely-A-Waste-Of-Our Time.  Solid D+!!!  Most people don't pass anything ever.  The point is Great.  "
Eminem will perform on the show to promote his new album, "Revival," which debuts on November 17." I guess we can expect new music.  All the clues were there.  In the next sentence.  That I was too lazy to read originally.
    12th paragraph.  Drinking a can of beer this entry.  Bout halfway through it.  It's the double can.  24oz.  Only The Best For Me.  It's November.  You know what that means.  Gotta write a Title for Web Page for when it shows up in your browser, the thing, that thing.  Hmm.  November.  What to do.  It takes a very delicate humor to come up with the most appropriate and hilarious thing possible. Hmm.  Here's something I've been workshopping-- Novemberzzz.  Sounds Good To Me.  Jeez.  Eight and a half paragraphs and crap left.  I have over 13 bucks as of this sentence.
Alright!  Anyway, what the what.  I get to 20 dolllars, I can start more-or-less responsibly playing those 1.50$ sit 'n gos.  I don't believe it!  Anyway.  I don't know.  Tomorrow will be 4 weeks since I brought in Guitar to get fixed.  He said it would take 2-3 weeks.  The point is I'm going to consult a lawyer to see if I could sue him for 300,000 dollars.  I think I've got a case and whatnot.  I hope I win, my doctor sued me 320,000 dollars for knocking on his door while he was mid-masturbation.  Figure out a way to sell a year of my health care for 20,000 dollars.  Then we're back to even.
    Hmm, selling health care on the black market.  Gotta be something there.  I don't have all the details.  What else is going on, it's the 14th paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Baseball Game in a couple of hours.  You know what?  I am gonna be kind of disappointed if the Dodgers win.  Watching these games, nominally rooting for the Astros, after all the excitement, it turns out I am Pot-Committed to rooting for the Astros.  Whatta tricksters.  Anyway, jeez.  Altuve will probably win MVP.  That's pretty good for the Astros.  He belongs to their Baseball Club.  I don't know, six paragraphs after this one.
    What the what.  Hey, birthday and Chanukah coming up.  Maybe get me one of those new TVs where its HD and I can watch Netflix and Whatnot.  My life only is 20-40% taken up by TV.  With a new TV, and more things to potentially watch, let's see if we can bump that up to 50-70%!  Anyway, jeez.  Thinkin' about buying into the 1.50 dollar sit 'n go now.  Gotta do something irresponsible.  That's the point of life.  Be irresponsible.  That'll show 'em!  Anyway, I don't know.  Tonight'll be okay.  Pick up Guitar and go through a few songs to potentially do on Saturday.  Which is a big Potentially at this point.  Never been to this Open Mic by myself.  Don't know how much fun it would be.
    Alright!  Five paragraphs to go!  I had to stay dressed all of yesterday like a chump in case any trick 'r treaters came.  And No One came.  Not a one.  Oh well, live and learn.  And there I was, wearing pants and a shirt, like a chump.  Okay.  Got some more words to go here before I'm done.  No pissing on the floor in close to a week!  Keep up the good work.  Talkin' to myself.  Jeez.  I don't wanna freak you out or anything, but I have Over 14 Dollars.  Anyway, jeez.  Stuy kids tweeting about the terrorist attack yesterday that they heard bullets and it was a shooting.  You were way off.  And you're supposed to be smart?  Stay in school, kids.  Especially because there's a terrorist outside!
If I had a nickel for every time I heard that...  What else.  17th paragraph.  It was a real Worthwhile Entry, I feel.  For me, at least.  I think it's a real D+/C-.  And you can't argue with the facts.  Also, starting to come to terms with my Post Title Stress Disorder.  What else.  Bad part about heating up Halal Food later is I gotta put it on a plate, like a chump.  I've discussed this before here.  Half the fun is eating it out of a, optimally, Styrofoam container, and, at least, a metal container.  Plates?  That's for chumps.  Also, what else is going on.  Lance McCullers Jr starting for the Astros.  Sounds like Lance McCullers Jr is about to join the World Series Greats.
    Three paragraphs to go.  Probably, at least.  Not looking forward to the Post Entry Stress Disorder, but I gotta end at some point.  BRB POCKET AA LOST TWO DOLLAR WHATTA JIP.  At least I still have like 12 dollars.  A little less.  Oh well, live and learn.  I'm up over 3 dollars this session all in all.  Cool.  As of now.  What else is going on.  Now they think I'm gonna be on tilt, but I'm only gonna tilt so much that they go on tilt thinking I'm on full tilt.  Sounds like a plan.  I can't believe it's only been four days since I saw The Snowman.  Life changing experience.  That's how I feel.
    Starting to get the idea I can go over 20 paragraphs.  Maybe write until baseball starts or something, I don't know.  I'm going to keep my options open for now.  Which is an expression.  Ya Learn Something New Every Now And Then.  Also, full disclosore, I'm inappropriately playing above my level.  I have over 11.5 dollars, I'm playing 2/5 cent.  I surrender myself to the Responsible Poker Playing Authorities.  Sure, why not.  Anyway, crap and crap.  19th paragraph.  What the what.  I like the term Lame Stream Media.  It has a negative urology implication.  That's how I feel about things.
    20th paragraph.  Down to being only up 1.6 dollars this session.  Oh well.  At least I'm Up 1.6 Dollars!  Sounds good to me.  Birthday in less than 6 weeks.  It's exactly 6 weeks after Halloween.  I crunched the numbers and that's what I came up with.  I don't know.  Was watching Indiana Jones & The Last Crusade before class after doctor.  Still got 15 minutes to go!  I can't wait.  I bet the same thing happens at the end as what I've seen previous times watching it.  I don't know.  Whatta clunker.  I blame you for some reason.
    Maybe Last Paragraph.  I hope so.  What else is going on.  Down to being only up 91 cents.  Whatta clunker.  The point is what else is going on.  What kinda shirt can I wear for Open Mic.  Gotta be a two-purpose shirt.  It also has to be a good shirt to wear if I don't go to open mic.  That makes sense.  Anyway, I can't believe I'm almost done here.  Great.  Unless I start more paragraphs for some reason.  No one would see that comin'.  And my main goal in this website is to be unpredictable...  I've given myself a lot to think about.  Up to up 1.26 dollars.  Fascinating Blog Fodder. 
    22nd paragraph.  I don't 100% know why I'm doing this.  What else.  I originally wrote Fascinating Blog Territory.  I made my choice and I stand by it.  Crap and crap.  Baseball is in 40 minutes.  That would line up nicely with 25 paragraphs at the rate I project paragraphs will go.  On the other hand, I can't remember one thing worth saying I said in the past hour.  That may only be like two paragraphs, though.  I'm hittin' all sorts of walls.  I wish I could hit right before the wall.  Then we're talking potential ground rule double.  Six umpires in World Series Games.  I wouldn't lie to you.  I may say wrong things, but not with purpose to deceit, rather, because I've been misinformed.  Lemme check that one out.  THERE'S SEVEN.  Holy Shit.  It's "A group that includes two rotating replay officials.  I think they should only count as half an umpire.  Six umpires.  That settles it.
    23rd paragraph.  Why Is This Happening.  Coordinate with Baseball Time is one theory.  Not Done With My Beer is another one.  Don't wanna stop playing poker is a third.  Legitimately want to add on more to this entry is a fourth.  That's a lot of reasons.  I'm tired of listing reasons.  Can't we just agree it's one or more of those four things?  Let's agree.  It's fun to agree!  You got another person whose on board with your bullshit!  What else.  Lost 2 dollars in unlucky fashion.  Such is life I guess.  What else.  I'm up 11 cents in poker.  That's more than 2 big blinds.  Not bad for two hours work.  The point is Hey 2 more paragraphs to go For Sure.
    Penultimate!  Wow.  Changed the size of my Poker Playing window.  Whole new game, now.  Everything's changed.  Especially the size of things in the window.  Changed it back.  I wasn't 100% comfortable.  Back to my bread and butter now, though.  Crap and crap.  Paragraph and a crap half to go.  Plus, I put that food on a plate, the rice ends up on top and the meat ends up on bottom.  Whatta jip!  White sauce and hot sauce all evaporates.  Microwaves are for chumps, is the point.  I will legitimately be upset if the Dodgers win.  More upset if they win than happy if the Astros win.  Probably.  Sounds about right.  Up 66 cents as of now in Poker.  Alright!   
    Last paragraph.  Let's hope.  Who wouldn't want to read 25 paragraphs of i'm up 2 dollars in poker.  now i'm up 3 dollars.  now i'm up 60 cents.  now i'm up 30 cents.  Probably no one, is my guess.  Jeez.  What else is going on for 5 or 10 more minutes.  Crap and stuff.  Lookin' forward to scheduling my show for Late December Potentially.  It sure is a thing to do.  Anyway, crap and crap.  Lots of Entries lately.  Writin' em is better than real life.  That's my opinion on things.  I'll see ya later.

-8:14 P.M.