Saturday, February 24, 2018

Titles!  Titles For Sale!

      Enter in the code #iwantsometitles for a discount!  100% off!  Now we're talking.  Anyway, crap and crap!  Another week in the books.  Got a new pair of glasses, matching my old pair of glasses.  Did another Open Mic.  Realized I still got another 3 or 4 or 5 more songs in my back pocket, as long as I'm willing to write a new verse or so for each one.  So that makes the open mics exponentially better.  Crap and crap, I don't know!  Keep getting good feedback at open mics.  I just don't see it.  I'm too busy doin' my thang and whatnot.  Anyway, crap and crap!  Looking into buying Civilization VI.  I assume you have to play as the Roman Empire based on how they signify the number 6.  I'm down with that!  Hopefully I can unlock a cheat code where you can play as the Holy Roman Empire!  Otherwise known as The Forgotten Empire.  The second most forgotten empire.  Right behind the Ottoman Empire.
    Commentary.  Anyway, what the what.  The Holy Roman Empire was around for a thousand years, and what do they got to show for it.  Nothin.  Constantinople even went through a name change.  What the what.  Spring Training is back!  For Baseballs and whatnot.  Gotta test out the baseballs before the season starts.  That's the real reason.  Heh.  Anyway, what the what!  Looks like I'm gonna start Testosterone Therapy.  I can't wait!  I get to rub gel on myself.  Now we're talking!  I don't know.  When I told my Urologist about starting Testosterone, he was like, you should know, if you plan on having kids, it can make you infertile.  And I chose to ignore that.  Not just I'll consider it but decide against it.  Nope, I chose to go, I'm just gonna pretend I never heard that.  I want to be non-infertile so let's just roll the dice and pretend that's not a possibility.
    In the end, though, not having kids, may be a good thing for our Civilization and whatnot.  Who needs some little Michael Kornblums running around.  What the what.  I'd like to deposit into a sperm bank.  Think of all the interest I'd accumulate!  My kids'll have all sorts of extra limbs and stuff.  Grow 2% more each year.  Also, it's fun!  You get to masturbate in a room where people know you're masturbating.  I can get off on that, sure, why not.  Anyway, jeez, third paragraph.  Wrote a second verse for a song for Monday Open Mic.  No third verse!  I'm putting my foot down.  Now all I gotta do is memorize it.  The one last week, I had to pause several times throughout the song to remember the new lyrics.  But it was good nonetheless.
    Fourth paragraph.  Jeez.  I'm rooting for the Mets this year.  You know, just to mix things up.  I had Chipotle this week!  It was great and whatnot.  I don't know.  Gotta be pretty surreal for these kids from the shoot-em-up high school.  First they go through being in a live experience where a guy is shooting people up and they're terrified.  Then they come to terms with the fact that odds are they lost one or more good friends.  I ain't talking acquaintances, they lost great friends.  Then they are the talk of the town, pressuring politicians, becoming the talk of the town.  That's a lot of craziness in a short amount of time.  In light of all this evidence, I've decided to support them.  I for one welcome our new Teen overlords.
    What else is going on.  Then they gotta go back to school.  Ouch!  The good news is if any of them want to run for congress or something in twenty years they got a good resume.  Survived School Shooting.  Pressured Politicians.  You remember that crap from 20 years ago, right?  I was that!  Anyway, jeez.  Fifth paragraph.  I wonder what teachers I would approach if I need teachers' recommendations for a Graduate School Situation.  In a year, would anyone remember me?  My guess?  Probably.  What else is going on and crap.  Saturday, eh?  I can dig it.  SNL is back next week!  They'll tell me what to think about things. Through humor!  Can't wait.  Crap and crap.
    Sixth paragraph.  Let's do it.  I can't wait to build settlers who will then build cities.  Pretty impressive that one settler can build an entire city.  That's a pretty good settler.  Still haven't gotten my new TV.  I'm way behind the average American in TV Watching Ability.  Whatta jip.  Crap and crap.  Should spend some time starting today memorizing new 12 lines of lyrics.  For Strategy Reasons.  Having it memorized properly by Monday Night strategy.  Last Open Mic I went #1!  Not urinating, I was the first one to perform.  I did go #1 half a dozen times, though, too.  Gotta take care of business, right?  Such is life and whatnot.
    Seventh paragraph.  Also, this past week, we got to do 2 songs.  Now we're talkin'!  And now we're singing.  Two songs.  Then it's done.  Anyway, what else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Olympics is almost over.  Doesn't get much more Wide Worldlier of Sportsitude than Olympics.  I don't know.  Entry is going at a solid C- rate.  I can dig it.  If I think about it outside myself, maybe I'm inhabiting the role of Yeah I'm good, other people keep saying it, must be true, but I'm pretending to be insecure or cool about it so I act cool and brush it off.  No!  I really am insecure about the quality of what I'm doing!  It's real and true!  C'mon!  Or, maybe people are just being nice, and I'm as mediocre as I think.
    Oh well, live and learn.  Eighth paragraph.  If it's ten paragraphs overall, I need to write three more paragraphs.  I crunched the numbers and everything.  I don't know.  What else is Crappening.  Got a little bit of money on poker.  Maybe enough to last me for a while, I don't know.  Could easily be gone by tonight.  What else is going on in wide world of bullshit website crap.  Hmmmmm.  We'll find out!  Together!  Cool.  Didn't get White Castle last Open Mic Afterwards.  Got half a meal of McDonalds at Penn Station instead.  Cool!  Good to mix things up.  Keeps the body healthy.  Just won a couple of dollars in poker.  Good sign that it might last me a little while longer.  That's how I feel.
    Ninth paragraph!  Now we're talking.  I don't know.  I'm talking, at least.  Through typing.  That's talking, in the abstract.  Talking=communicating=writing.  That settles that.  Oh, also, writing=typing.  That settles that.  No Leap Day this year.  Whatta jip.  If a year doesn't have leap day, who really cares.  Also, probably said it before, but Leap Day is inaccurate.  It's the day we don't leap.  It should be called No-Leap Day.  Let's get on board with that and whatnot.  Anyway.  One paragraph and change to go.  I can dig it.  Then what's in store.  A couple of hours before dinner.  At least one and a half, at least.  Then we're solidly into Evening Mode.  Which involves something.  I forget.  Drinking, that sounds right!
    Tenth paragraph.  Let's do it.  Should memorize the new lyrics completely today.  That sounds productive.  Not to mention Strategic.  What else.  Phrase Not To Mention is no good.  You're mentioning it.  That's the whole point.  Anyway.  Started watching full episodes of Duckman on YouTube.  I'd like to watch them all, but am going slowly, because at some point I'll be able to watch it on TV instead of my phone.  So gotta strategically save it for that.  Also, good show.  Really holds up well and whatnot.  I don't know.  Also, even better then when I watched it.  It's really for Adults.  And I'm more or less an adult these days, all things considered.  Anyway, I'll catch ya later.

-4:50 P.M. 

Sunday, February 18, 2018

I've Got It!  Titles!

      Alright what's going on and crap.  Had a dream I started a new music project and it was leaps and bounds ahead of what I had done in the past.  Woke up, watched TV for five hours.  Went to Digital 8 Track, couldn't get the sound output working.  Well, there goes that!  It's helpful when our dreams die so easily.  Real convenient.  Makes moving forward with Dreamless Life all the more doable.  Jeez, crap and crap.  Yesterday, started Transcendetal Meditationism!  I'm not gonna tell you my Safe Word, but oh man, is it great. Damn that woulda been a good one.  "Great."  Would become grating over time, though.  And I'd spent at least two minutes every day thinking about dogs.  Grrr, eat.  That's the life of a dog.  Where was I.  Right, great, great...  Great, great... what else is going on.
    I like it because it's just like regular thinking, only you don't need to do the hard work of continuing a thought.  One word is Thinking enough for me!  Anyway, what the what.  I picked my word by picking up a random book, picking a random page, and picking a random word.  But it worked out great!  Damn, if only I had used this entry, I might have settled upon Great.  That woulda been great.  Anyway, what the what.  I can't tell you my secret password.  Then it's all ruined.  Gotta make sure not even to imply it with this entry.  You can't read into the entry and deduce what my codeword is.  Then we're back to Zero.  Another good word.  I think you're supposed to only use one syllable words.  My word may or may not be multi-syllable.  Oh well, live and learn.
    Third paragraph.  Can't do music, so might as well do this.  This is half-way productive.  And if there's one thing I want to be in life is half-way something.  A lot easier and more convinient than going the whole amount of yards.  Ten?  That makes the most sense.  Nine, I've heard that somewhere, don't get it.  Eleven?  THat's a first down and then some!  I don't know what I'm doing here.  Crap, right?  Oh yeah.  It's been a few months since I've sat down to do Crazysheet without the auspice of it being Okay This Is Crap.  I feel like I've gone through stages in my recent past where I was like This is a real thing!  Gotta continue it in that tradition and whatnot.  Now it's just crap that makes me feel better about not really doing anything with my life in the non-abstract.
    Fourth paragraph.  Jeez.  Lost a lot in poker.  Time to move down in stakes!  That's the Responsible way to go about things.  What else is going on.  Got Open Mic tomorrow.  Seems I was wrong about Black Panther.  Maybe America isn't as racist as I thought.  Alright!  Let's celebrate by consuming more mass media.  Anyway, jeez, crap and crap.  I don't have a problem with mass media.  A lot easier to access than... opposite... not mass... make a chemistry reference... fourth paragraph....  Hey what's going on.  I don't 100% get the commercials for toilet paper.  Really seems to fetishize toilet paper to a degree where I'm uncomfortable.  That's Mass Media for ya, always fetishizing things.  Cracked that code. 
    Fifth paragraph!  Anyway, what the what.  Got Chicken Pot Pie for dinner tonight.  On nights I will consume Chicken Pot Pie for dinner, I always don't look forward to it.  I coulda gone with something more tastefully pleasing than chicken pot pie.  Then when it comes to eat it, I'm like, you know what, this is good!  That's where my life is at these days.  Also, healthier than most things I eat!  Alright!  Anyway, what the what.  If I'm playing lower stakes, what's the point.  In the abstract, why does it effect my enjoyment level if I'm playing 2/5 cent or 5/10 cent.  It makes no difference.  But I'm a Chump with a quasi-gambling addiction.  Such is life.  Gottta have some quasi-addictions.  Otherwise, you'd have full fledged addictions.  And that's no good!
    Sixth paragraph.  What the what.  It seems these high school kids from the school shooting ain't taking no guff.  Alright!  I'm on board with that I guess.  Seems like something I'd support.  Then again, I'm paying them several minutes a day of my precious, precious attention when I read News.  Imagine all the other fun stuff I could be paying attention to with those precious, precious few minutes.  I could be saying Great.  Great.  Grrr eat.  Gr8.  G-rate.  Rated G.  All Dogs Go To Heaven.  And really work it out.  Anyway, what the what.  I don't know.  Air Bud.  That might have been rated PG-13.  That clown committed a lot of animal abuse.  Can't be subjecting children to paying attention to that.  Rather they just watch the news.  What's in the news today.  School Shooting?  Awwwwww.
    Jeez.  Seventh paragraph.  Is it really a school shooting if the perp wasn't in the school?  I mean, he's 19, he was right out of school.  But say he was 49.  49 year old gets onto school, shoots some kids.  Do we associate that with school shootings committed by members of the school?  Or do we somehow separate them in terms of what we title them.  Gotta figure this out now before its too late.  What the what.  Couldn't of happened in Stuyvesant.  We needed ID cards to entire the building!  Problem solved.  Except for that Librarian who workeed there who ate people.  That's not even an absurb-em-up joke.  There was a Stuy librarian who went to jail for planning to eat people or something.  And I remember him!  When I used to play poker in the back of the library.  I remember seein' his mug. 
    Anyway, what the what.  Never tried to eat me.  Grrrr.  What else is going on.  Gonna get some new stickers tomorrow!  For a month, I supplemented looking forward to Open Mic with looking forward to White Castle afterwards.  That lost it's charm.  Now gonna supplement it with looking forward to one or two new irreverent, clever stickers!  Gotta make up for a lot of lost time, half a year when I didn't collect them.  Anyway, what the what.  Eighth paragraph.  I got that going for me.  Whatta do with the rest of the night.  There's dinner.  There's kill brain cells through a variety of ways-- drinking, watching TV, hitting my head against the wall.  You know, just to mix things up.  Gotta keep myself occupied somehow.  Occupy Kornblum.  The next big movement.  Anyway, I'm gonna make my next big movement.  Need some fetishized toilet paper.
    What the wha.  Ninth paragraph.  Jeez.  When I was a kid, we referred to them as BMs.  That's how we did it in my household.  I don't know, what the what.  I guess I'm going for 10 paragraphs.  That seems to be how I do things around here.  Anyway.  And in the dream, it wasn't just 2 minute bullshit songs.  It was a real album.  With real songs.  What a crazy dream.  Anyway, what the what, what's going on.  Figured out I have one more song I've never played at Open Mic yet.  I needed to write a new 1 and a half verses, but I'm ready with it!  Now all I need to do is memorize the new lyrics.  Cool!  Jeez, I don't know.  I'm a little confused as to why there's been several commercials for Book Of Morman during the last 200 episodes of SNL.  Still waiting for someone to explain it to me.
    Tenth paragraph!  Almost made it.  Cool.  The last month or two I've had my guitar tuned to standard E tuning.  Instead of a step down, standard D tuning.  Or half a step down.  Which is, I wanna say, standard Eb tuning?  That's my best guess.  What else is going.  On.  I shut down my computer a few days ago.  As a reward for operating perfectly for the past 2 or 3 months.  Give it a little time off.  Recharge.  I assume it enjoyed it.  What else is going on.  My back up pair of glasses is a real chump.  It's not as good vision-wise, and looks chumplike.  Anyway, I feel like I don't wanna end at the end of this paragraph.  End the paragraph, sure.  But not end the end of the entry.  Just end the end of the paragraph ending.
    11th paragraph!  Awesome.  Jeez, now I have to write an 11th paragraph.  That's a first down, and then some!  Awesome.  Anyway, jeez.  I don't get why professional bowlers can't bowl 300 games every time.  I looked it up on the internet, and read the explanation, and I still don't get it.  This is your thing, throwing strikes.  Just do it 10 times, what are you, stupid.  12 times, fine, whatever.  The explanation said something about how different lanes are oiled differently, and stuff like that.  Still, you're professionals!  Figure it out on your practice bowl they give you before each game and adjust accordingly!  Also, they should give you a practice bowl.  Makes this whole scenario all the more plausible.
    Anyway.  I mean, the final game in Kingpin was 229-228, I think.  You can do better!  C'mon.  Maybe the moral of the story is that professionals aren't that great at things.  Really gives us amateurs a feel good thing or something.  12th paragraph.  Cool!  I wanna finally get my driver's liscence, but my Dad is like, as long as you're drinking, no way.  And I'm like, yeah, but I'd never drink and drive, you know, on account of valuing my life and health to some extent?  But it still ends the conversation.  Sure I listen to whatever my Dad says, I'm only 29!  I don't know, crap and crap.  He pays the bills.  Some of it is my money, sure, but he takes care of doing the payment of the bills.
    13th paragraph!  Maybe I can get to 15.  That would be a real win.  It's been a real wild time so far.  Remember that one time I wrote something bordering on being a joke?  Wasn't quite funny, but it almost resembled something that potentially was structured like something that could be bemusing.  Anyway, what the what.  I don't know.  Two and a half paragraphs to go in this crazy, 15 paragraph scenario.  What else.  I don't 100% like the structure of my weeks.  The main thing I do and look forward to being on Monday Nights.  Just don't really click.  Anyway, what the what.  When you have no schedule, doesn't that make the one night you do do something moot?  You'd think so, but no.  On account of there being a weekly TV schedule, and a Film schedule, and a Music schedule.  You know, having your life revolve around Mass Media?  C'mon get with the program.
    Penultimate paragraph!  What else do I got.  I don't know.  I'm against school shootings.  I don't like the gun debate, though.  I'm for gun restrictions.  So you say we shuoldn't be allowed to have guns?  Well, not 100%, just make it harder to get, can't have as many, can't have machine guns, crazy people can't get 'em, etc.  That sounds like a lot of details to think about.  You don't wanna spend your precious thinking times thinking about the nuts and bolts of the debate, do ya?  Wouldn't ya just rather do something else?  Yes!  I don't know.  Maybe we shouldn't be allowed to have guns.  If that's what it takes, I don't know.  Let the debate begin!  Have Mass Media debate it, so I don't have to waste my time. 
    Anyway, great, made it to the last paragraph.  If we've learned anything from super hero movies, it's that we don't need guns to defeat criminals.  There's this one guy who turns green when he gets angry, and we can train him to get angry when someone breaks the law.  We got this other guy who can spin webs and jump really high.  That'll come in handy against villains.  I don't know, what the what.  We got 2 dozen super heroes, and not one of their powers is I Have A Machine Gun.  I don't think so, at least.  Some of them use technology.  But not guns!  Anyway, what the what.  You can't take away the right to have guns, we as citizens need them!  For what.  To shoot things!  Why do you need to shoot things?  Because I'm Used To Having The Right To Do It!
    Jeez.  16th paragraph.  Hmm, why do you need to shoot things.  This hypothetical straw man makes a good point.  Because I'm a hunter!  I hunt game!  No you don't.  But I Might One Day!  Anyway, let's move on.  Already surpassed 15 paragraphs.  It's all gravy from here.  Death Wish: The Movie was on a few nights ago.  What a piece of shoe.  That guy's moustache was completely unrealistic.  Anyway, what else do I have going on.  I don't like how Super Hero and Sci Fi movies are becoming increasingly consolidated to the point where in a decade, every single movie will exist in the same universe.  Makes me feel uncomfortable inside. 
    Okay.  Four paragraphs to go for 20.  That would be pretty great.  I also don't like the mixing of supernatural super heroes and theoretically possible, usually technology-based super heroes.  Anyway, what the what.  What about those in-between, like Spiderman.  Eh, I'd say he's in the theoretically possible.  I mean like Thor and Superman.  Where their power is just that they can do everything great.  Also, just don't like super hero movies that much in general.  Oh well, live and learn.  Maybe put Chicken Pot Pie in oven now.  It takes an hour and a half to be ready.  I can see myself enjoying a nice dinner in an hour and a half.  Cool! 
    18th paragraph.  Now we're talking.  What we were doing before.  Anyway.  I really should quit smoking cigarettes.  For strategy reasons.  Health strategy.  My guess is it would add 7-10 years on my life expectancy.  Without exaggeration.  Which is a lot!  That's my take away from things.  In the mean time, gonna smoke a cigarette.  It makes me feel good because it's an example and evidence of how I Have Tamed Fire.  Like to be reminded of my good fortune in taming stuff 20 times a day.  What else is going on and crap.  It's also an example of Hah!  I Laugh At Death.  By Expediting It's Process.
    Penultimate Paragraph!  Again.  Maybe correctly this time.  Also, Oh Right The Chemically Addictive Stuff.  Almost forgot about thems.  Anyway, what else is going on.  Spring coming up in a month.  Lookin' forward to that.  Longer days, less intrusive weather.  Anyway.  Crap and crap.  I get to do stuff tomorrow!  I don't believe it.  And I even have a song which I haven't played before.  That makes it exponentially more fun!  Jeez, a paragraph and a half to go.  I don't believe it.  What fun.  My Mom's birthday is in a week.  Then My Dad's is two days after.  I won't say their age, but, man are they old.  Might as well be living with grandparents at this point.
    Alright, 20th paragraph.  We did it!  By which I mean I did it.  With your assumed support.  Anyway, crap and crap.  I turn 30 years old.  And, considering I'm a smoker, right in time for my mid-life crisis!  Alright!  What else is going on.  I did put my Chicken Pot Pie in the oven a paragraph or two ago.  So I got that going for me in my immediate future.  What else is going on and crap.  Six minutes away from the start of a new hour.  Maybe something great is about to play on TV!  I can hardly contain my excitement.  So much so, that I anticipate the imminent end of this entry even more so than usual!  Alright!  I'll see ya later and whatnot.

-7:55 P.M. 

Friday, February 16, 2018

Let's Title It Up!

      Alright.  Great. What's going on and crap.  A couple of short Crazysheet Fodders I wrote down.  One--  If Lisa in the Simpsons is so great at school, why does she get kicked out of class at the beginning of every episode?  Social Commentary.  Valuable braincrap!  Also, another thing.  In the movie Man On The Moon, there's a scene in the middle with a club booking Andy Kaufman and Tony Clifton.  Someone's like, you know Tony Clifton is Andy Kaufman.  And the booker is like, Exactly!  We're getting two Andy Kaufmans for the price of one.  Uh, actually, you're getting one Andy Kaufman for the price of two.  This has really stuck in my craw or whatever that saying is for a long time.
    So I got that out of my system.  What else is going on.  There's a guy at the Sidewalk Coffee Open Mic who hands out clever and irreverent stickers every Monday.  Started puttin' em on my guitar case.  Seems like somethin' a Cool Music Dude would be doing.  Mementos from my hard work and whatnot.  Anyway, crap.  Hah, Lisa does get kicked out of class every episode.  Good Social Commentary.  Anyway, what the what.  Got Chinese Food for dinner later.  And no one can take that away from me!  Unless someone shows up and takes it away from me.  Odds are against that, though.  Never happened even once in my past.  What else is going on.  Entryin' it up.  I really should get started on doing some new songs.  I need an outlet for my creativity!  And whatnot.  Crap and crap.
    Third paragraph.  What the what.  Up a few dollars in poker today.  Let's see if that lasts.  I've started having recurring dreams of playing online poker and winning a lot.  So I got that going for me.  I don't know.  Crap and crap.  Pot committed to writing an entry now.  Already into the third paragraph!  What's going on in the news.  Bullshit and stuff, that's my guess.  I wonder if Black Panther will underperform expectations because white people are scared to go to theaters with a large amount of black people.  My guess?  I'm racist just for guessing that.  Damnit!  I hate it when that happens.  I'll probable see it tomorrow or something.  Pot committed to the whole thing and whatnot.
    At least there'll be a lot of audible commentary about it while its playing.  Cause of stereotypes, right?  Jeez.  I watched Wonderwoman, and that wasn't too intimidating.  Covered women.  Now it's time for African American.  Then I've seen all sorts of super heroes.  Anyway, what the what.  Fourth paragraph.  Jeez.  Words, words.  I gotta come up with some great combinations of words.  That make sense.  You know, for strategy?  Making sense strategy.  Anyway.  Stickers are fun.  You get to take off paper from the back and then stick the remaining paper to something.  What else.  Been two months since Class ended.  Oh boy has it flown by.  With very little accomplished.  Did my show at the end of December.  That's about it.
    Crap and crap.  Fifth paragraph!  What else.  Today is Friday.  Let's get on board with that.  Wonder Woman and Black Panther each specify what makes them different than normal super heroes right in their name.  Woman and Black.  Just to make sure everyone's on board from the start.  There's no super hero named White Dude.  Although maybe there should be.  I don't know, what else and crap.  Jeez.  How come there's no Jewish Super Hero.  Maybe Peter Parker is Jewish and they just don't mention it.  Sort of is implied.  That's my guess. 
    Anyway.  What the what.  Sixth paragraph.  Alright!  How come there's a new Colonial Sanders every six months.  You're not giving us enough time to get invested with this character.  Defeats the whole purpose.  Not sure about all these Fast Food Spokesman Leaders.  McDonalds.  Hey, if a clown is in charge, it must be good hamburgers!  KFC makes a little more sense.  Southern Military Men make special chicken, I guess.  Anyway, jeez, what the what.  I really should start trying other Open Mics.  But doing one a week is about right for me.  And I already like this one I've been doing.  Oh well, live and learn.  Huh?  Jeez, crap and crap. 
    Seventh paragraph.  Cool!  I don't know.   Saw Endocrinologist yesterday who took my weight.  I'm up about 15 pounds from the lowest I reached last year.  That's not so bad!  I can handle 15 pounds.  All I need to do is start going the other direction.  Cool!  What the what.  Got a haircut.  Probably mentioned that last entry.  I don't know.  What else is going on.  Down a few dollars since I started this entry.  Such is life.  Cool.  Anyway, jeez.  At least now I know how to do a minor scale.  Not just any minor scale, A minor scale!  That's what I said.  Jeeez.  Crap and crap, I don't know.
    Alright.  Eighth paragraph.  I can do this.  Sure, why not.  What else.  I don't know.  Seein' a movie would involve Walking.  A lot of walking.  Well, a fair amount of walking, at least.  Some of it uphill!  Whatta jip.  Got a new credit card.  A lot more aesthetically pleasing.  Really sharp lookin' card.  Damn, gave too much away.  Now you can steal it or something.  Oh well, live and learn.  How come I can't think of more than two or three bands from this decade that I really like.  It's been eight or nine years.  That's a lot of years, and there's a lot of qualifying music bands.  Is that a natural part of getting older, regardless of when you were born?  New music doesn't really get you goin'?  Shouldn't be.  Music is music.  It's all A Minor Pentatonic Scales, when you really get down to brass tacks.
    Brass Tacks.  Hmm.  Alright, I guess.  Ninth paragraph.  Got at least 2 to go.  Maybe seven!  I don't believe it.  I think it's safe to say my favorite band from this decade is Me.  I sure hope it's safe to say.  If we live in a society where its not safe to say things, oh boy, no good.  Jeeeeez.  I should have gotten my new TV three months ago.  Whatta jip!  Here I am watching the same ol' crap over and over.  Such is life.  Hey, it's the ninth paragraph.  Still.  Cool!  What else.  Yesterday would have been my second music lesson if I had decided to continue.  Who knows how much I would have learnt at this point if I had continued.  No one.  It's unknowable.
    Huh.  Cool.  I don't like learning music.  I don't wanna listen to music I like and start thinking about it in terms of identifying what they're doing.  Who needs it!  I wanna listen to it and enjoy it.  Not think about what they're doing.  That's the Chump's Route.  Cool.  I think I look like a nerd with my new haircut.  Oh well.  Such is life.  Endocrinologist really liked my haircut.  I got that going for me at least.  This'll probably be the last paragraph.  I don't know.  Life ain't goin so productively.  Gotta do somethin a lot.  Alright, whatever.  I'll see ya later.

-6:41 P.M.

Tuesday, February 13, 2018

I Got Titles, Lots of Titles

      Alright!  Tuesday.  Let's do this thing.  Discontinued Music Lessons.  I ain't got time for that!  Gotta focus on other stuff.  Like waiting to get a new TV.  That should take up a lot of time.  And crazysheet!  Let's get on board with comedy instead of music.  That's my takeaway from life.  Anyway, jeez.  Tuesday, eh?  I can dig it.  At least now I know A Scale.  That's a win in my book.  Also, gotta write a book.  You know, to put wins in?  That settles that.  Jeez is this a clunker so far.  Maybe it'll get better!  That's my guess.  It's good to do stuff.  Gotta try to do something here.  Maybe if I drink alcohol it will be better.  That's my Life Hypothesis.
    Jeez.  Crap and crap.  Got my haircut.  One less thing to worry about.  Is my hair hanging on my head okay?  Don't need to think about it!  Frames to my glasses broke.  Lenses are okay.  Wearing back up pair now.  That's where I'm at in life right now.  Anyway.  Olympics going on.  Whatta snooze.  If anything interesting happens, it'll be a movie 20 years from now.  Might as well wait to see if that happens.  Watching Shallow Hal.  What, astronauts aren't good enough for you, supercomputer?  What's your problem.  Astronauts are just fine.  How come some people appear ugly/beautiful when they're not while Hal is under his non-shallow phase, but other people look the same.  I guess some people's inner beauty match their outer beauty exactly.  That's an explanation.
    But some characters, we can see their inner beauty, it doesn't match their outer beauty, but Hal still sees them the same!  I got a lot of problems with this movie, and I'm gonna take it down.  From the inside.  Huh?  Jeez.  Third paragraph.  Why did Tony Robbins agree to do this movie.  Someone pitches him the idea, he goes, You do know, I don't actually supernaturally hypnotize people?  They go Yeah, it's a movie.  He goes, Okay, pay me a million dollars!  They say, Alright, we're in business!  That's my hypothesis how that went down.  Anyway, what the what.  Spring Training starting.  I like baseball.  It's like other sports but with more baseballs and baseball bats.  Also, gloves.  Not a lot of gloves in other sports.  Maybe hockey.  They might wear gloves for gripping purposes.
    I don't have all the answers!  Oh well.  I will some day.  Makes sense to me.  I think the Farrelly Brothers movies have good soundtracks.  I don't care who knows how I feel.  I think the Farrelly Brothers blew it with Dumb and Dumber To.  It was okay, but could have been better.  You heard it here first.  What the what.  I like fantasizing about going to film school.  It won't happen, but it's fun to fantasize about.  Making a really good student film.  People'll be like, this takes student films to the next level!  That's my fantasy.  Anyway.  Everything's going at a solid C- rate in my life.  Not too bad, but nothin to write home about.
    Whose up for some fifth paragraphs!  What the what.  I like fantasizing about joining an intense friendly fantasy baseball league.  Doin' some drafts.  Well, one, at least.  Not as knowledgeable as I was in high school, but more than I was two or three or four or maybe five years ago.  Maybe even six, lets go crazy.  Got my testicles examined.  The cyst is no bigger than last year, and nothin' to be worried about still.  Unless the urologist is lying to me.  And urologists are noted liars.  Anyway, jeez.  I don't know.  I have a hard time thinking of something else I'd rather watch less than Olympics.  Anyway, jeez.  Have Wonder Woman to watch on HBO.  A little intimidated to watch it.  That's how I feel.
    Sixth paragraph!  Anyway.  As far as Avengers go, Spiderman is barely holding his weight.  I like Spiderman, but in the Avengers world, kind of a clunker.  Anyway, jeez.  I've come around on all the super hero movies being 60% of all movies.  Comics were the main thing in the middle of the 20th century.  Why not being the main thing in a new medium.  I'm not the biggest fan, but it's not insulting or anything to real movies.  Seems like the natural progression of things.  What else.  Man, when I get my new TV, so much crap to watch.  It's good to have something to look forward to.  I can start a new round of music, too.  Even without lessons.  Write some real great bullshit and whatnot.
    What else.  Someone sent me a video of me doing a song at open mic, under the guise of it proving I'm good.  I sound terrible and look terrible.  Oh well, there goes that.  I always got Blog and whatnot.  Can't even see what I look like.  It's all words!  And the words look fine to me.  Real fine.  What else.  I like doing free Internet Tarot Card Readings.  The internet is real good at witchcraftery.  Anyway, jeez.  Damnit, let the devil into my life.  There goes that.  I hate it when that happens.  What else is going on and crap.  Flavored Potato Chips are for the lazy.  Hey, I like potato chips with this kind of dip... if only I didn't have to spend all that energy actually dipping it.  Who am I to talk, I eat flavored potato chips.
    Anyway, what the what.  That was one thing I wrote down to remember to talk about.  Potato Chips Are For The Lazy.  Enough to remember the entire riff.  Another thing-- Tupac vs 2Pac.  Someone once told me when I was young, Tupac is from before he died, everything released after he died was 2Pac-- who is actually a different person pretending to be him.  Now I'm under the impression that's all completely wrong.  Oh well, live and learn.  Eighth paragraph.  Sweet.  Are people's organs the same size regardless of their size as a person?  My guess?  Yes.  That settles that.  Jeez.  I don't know what I'm doing here.  I got so much Empty Time, and I like fantasizing about doing productive stuff with it.  Writing great crazysheet.  Great music.  Not panning out the way I hoped.
    Ninth paragraph!  Great.  Sometimes I fantasize about going to bed in my old room.  I moved from Small Room to Bigger Room when my brother moved out to college.  I'd like to sleep in the old room every now and then.  Good to have dreams.  Sure is.  Every few months I try to sleep on the floor.  Just to mix things up.  It's okay, it's comfortable!  So far I get tired of it before falling asleep and go back to bed.  But it's good to mix things up, is the point.  I don't know.  Tried to sing well last open mic.  Just to mix things up.  Got less of a response than when I don't sing well.  Such is life.
    Tenth paragraph.  Will this be the last?  Will it not be?  I don't know, get off my back about it and whatnot.  I'd settle for a life of Getting New TV And Watching Bigger And Better Shows.  And Movies!  That should keep me occupied for a year and a half.  Anyway, jeez.  I heard Taco Bell and KFC are going to start delivering.  It's about time!  I watch all of Taco Bell's commercials and I think they're really thinking outside the bun.  What else.  I was watching The Simpsons and at some point a character says What Did I Do To Deserve This?  Which was 50% of the dialogue I wrote for my Moleman Script.  Oh well, there goes that and whatnot.  Gonna aim for more paragraphs.  Because of crap and bullshit.
    Alright!  What else.  I wanna get contact lenses.  Time to mix things up.  These frames, while good, look a little too big for my face, according to Video.  Whatta jip.  Anyway, what the what.  It's good to do Open Mics and Music Stuff to get to know people, but I find it's a lot easier to not get to know anyone.  That's my takeaway from life.  Could make this the last paragraph.  Cool.  What else is going on.  I bit a nail a few days ago that was really good.  The nail had grown way more than my nails usually make it.  Was a real thrill to take care of that.  Gross.  Yep.  It's called grooming yourself, get with it.  I don't know.  Maybe one more paragraph.
    Cool!  What else is going on.  Last paragraph.  Life is going at a solid D+ rate.  C- if we're gonna be generous.  Lets be generous.  That's what Buddha says.  Probably.  Seems like something he'd be on board with.  Crap and crap.  Whattado with the rest of my day.  Find some real great bullshit to watch on TV.  Anyway.  I don't know.  Jeez.  I guess this new era of Nationalism should be good for the Olympics.  No more of we're a global community, lets get along.  Now it means something again.  We're enemies, let's fight-- in sports!  Doesn't do it for me, though, still.  What else is going on.  Really should aim for 15 paragraphs.  It's good to set goals for yourself.  Just like in sports.  Nailed it.
    Possibly the worst Nailed It ever.  What else is going on and crap.  13th paragraph.  We'll take it on a paragraph by paragraph basis.  Basis?  Sure.  Sounds like the right word.  Close enough, at least.  Yeah that's gotta be right.  Doesn't sound right.  Pretty sure it is.  Fine, you seem pretty sure, I'm on board with that.  Cool thanks.  Anyway, jeez.  Hopefully two and a half more paragraphs.  That's a good number.  25% of ten.  25% is a real solid percent.  I wanna start using numbers in Base 12.  it's a logical base and whatnot.  What the Hell am I doing here.  Bullshit!  You know, like all those times before?  Oh right it's all coming back to me.
    Penultimate!  What else.  Jeez.  I gotta get my life together.  All the free time is promising-- there's opportunity to do productive things with it.  So far, what I've been doing is not promising-- nothing.  The point is Great What Else.  Got some paragraphing to do.  With no inspiration.  Whatta jip.  Let's see, crap, crap.  What do I got.  Losing a few dollars on Poker each day on average.  Based on the last, what, two or three days?  That's a good track record to deduce patterns from.  Deduce patterns hardcore!  I don't know, jeez.  A Minor pentatonic scale sounded weird to me because I was taught to imagine it in the key of C.  Ya see, Am is related to C, think of C.  Once I started imagining it in key of Am, it made sense.  Cause that's what it is.
    Looks like the student has become the master.  It's about time.  Last paragraph!  Jeez.  At least I'm not in physical pain.  That's good.  Life could be worse.  You could be in physical pain.  And I'm not!  Alright!  Got White Castle for dinner.  It's losing some of its charm when you get it once a week.  Still good, though!  Alright, jeez, what else.  Not in too much mental pain, either.  Just boredom, all in all, for the most part.  Anyway, when will the next entry be!  I can hardly imagine.  Or contain my excitement.  Or other stuff potentially.  I don't know.  I'll see ya later.

-4:56 P.M.

Thursday, February 8, 2018

Titles Ain't Noise Pollution

      At least I hope not.  It's always been my dream to not be a pollutant.  Titles being pollution of any sort is a real net negative and a mark against my name.  A Bad Mark!  I'm not talking check plusses or anything.  Anyway, jeez.  Just got back from my first guitar lesson ever!  It was okay!  Starting to learn which fingers to use to play notes.  I'd been doin' it willy-nilly, and it's about time I got started on the right track.  Learned a bit of music theory.  Ya see, there's an A Minor chord.  Following me?  Then there's a C chord.  Kinda related!  So the point is that was a net positive.  Good chance I'll be doing that again!  Jeez.  It's late to start an entry.  Rock N Roll never sleeps!  As well as Rock N Roll's faithful sidekick, journal-like comedy.
    I can just feel the good vibes of starting to get into another routine.  I like it!  Plus, on the taxi home, another taxi user was talking to the taxi controller about professional music.  He's a big time manager or host or something.  Apparently the big thing now is buying houses in the suburbs of Nashville.  So, yeah, I'm pretty connected to all the doings and whats going on in music.  Gotta urologist appointment tomorrow morning.  Urology never sleeps!  Or, at least, it wakes up pretty early.  One of those two things.  My parents on my back about these lessons.  It's my money, I do what I want!  Get out of my house!  Oh, it's your house?  I'll be quiet then. Fair enough.
    Third paragraph!  Anyway.  Gotta get into some routine.  It's useful, for your mind-health.  The Superbowl happened.  The team that scored the most points won.  Sounds fair to me.  I don't know whether I'm justified in being happy when the stock market crashes.  I like the idea of rich people losing some of their money.  But my guess is it effects not-rich people, too.  That's my working hypothesis.  Oh well, live and learn.  Got some money on poker.  That's good.  I'm not a fan of my parents nagging me a lot.  You know, on account of being an adult?  Why should I have to deal with this just because they pay for everything for me.  Not these lessons!  Thems are being covered by a gift!
    Fourth paragraph.  Love all that train time to and from lesson.  Especially LIRR.  Subway is fine, but LIRR, now you're talking some great Train Time.  My parents were also on my case about it not being in a safe neighborhood.  I didn't see one person get mugged or assaulted or anything the entire time I was there!  Parents just don't understand.  Anyway, jeez.  What did I miss while I was gone.  Jacob DeGrom wants to win the world series.  Good for him.  That's the right kind of attitude for a spots player.  Especially a baseballer.  I don't know.  Microsoft keeps reverting back to Italics and I don't Have a problem with it!  I'll take some excessive italicising if that's what's being recommended today.
    Fifth para... ok now it's getting to be a hassle.  Fif... FUCH.  Fifth paragraph.  Okay.  Now you're getting on my nerves, computer program.  Anyway.  Sure I'll play some pentatonic scales with using the correct fingers.  I can handle that all week long.  What else.  Urologist at 9 AM tomorrow.  That's the kind of structure I could do without!  Unless he finds a cancerous tumor.  Then, it's Structure Well Spent.  Plus, I get to have cancer!  Finally.  Anyway, jeez.  I've got a headache.  Either it's from taking 4 Ritalin over the course of the day instead of the perscribed 2, or... something else.  I learnt my lesson.  From now on, only taking more than 2 Ritalin a day once a week!
    Sixth paragraph.  And I didn't even have to change from Italics.  Now we're all on the same page.  FrontPage.  It's the name of the program I'm using.  Now I'm scared to use Italics even when I want in fear that it will revert to the standard.  Oh well, gotta take chances, that's what life is all about.  Either Life, or Fear Factor.  I get those confused sometimes.  I like that movie Hitchcock.  The one about the director, not the superhero.  He's a role model we should all emulate.  The superhero, not the director.  Ugh.  Still no New TV.  What, I can't rewatch Parks & Recreation, like a chump?  Where does life get off.  I don't know.  That's why I asked.  Maybe you do.
    Seventh paragraph!  What the what.  My Lighter is on it's last legs.  Time to retire it.  It's always hard letting go, though.  You know it's got to have half a dozen more lights in it, if you hit the clicker a dozen times to get there.  Now I'm wasting lighters.  Bad for the environment.  This is almost as bad as the word pollution.  Anyway, jeez.  I could start busking.  Do that one day a week.  I can even combine it with Lesson Day.  Go into the city at 1 or 2, busk for 3 or 4 hours.  I just need the perfect busking place.  And audience.  And skillset!  And material.  Once we've covered all that, though, only one thing remains-- what's busking.  After we got all that covered, though, sounds like a good idea.
    And I can potentially pay anywhere from 10-50% of the lessons through the busking!  I like ideas and this one sure is an idea.  I'd stand by that in a court of law.  Or a court of basketball.  Whichever one is deemed more appropriate.  Might try to have some fun with lessons.  Write a new song every day.  Track my progress through how the songs reflect my learnings.  I recorded a piece of crap yesterday, even, before the lessons start.  Sort of as a baseline.  No vocals, but boy does that odd chord progression almost line up with the nonsense melodies.  That's my takeaway from life.  I still check CunyFirst every few days to make sure they haven't rescinded my degree.  Wouldn't completely surprise me if they do.  Wait u mean to tell me i gotta be using my pinky for this?  I been using my ring finger!  get the fuck out!
    ABL.  Always Be Learning.  I'm even learning writing entries.  Learning that I still have it in me to write a D+ whenever I want.  Alright!  I was aiming for 10 paragraphs, but at this point, maybe 15 is within reach!  It'd probably take me past Midnight, so I'd have to adjust the Day at the top of the entry.  I can handle that, though!  I've handled similiar things on the past.  Ninth paragraph.  Sweet.  This guy is a really good teacher because he tricked me into feeling proud of myself for performing the most remedial things.  That's what a good teacher is, right?  It's at least one of the most important aspects I'd venture.
    Tenth paragraph.  What the what.  I don't know.  Been doin' good in poker.  That might last another day and a half.  That's the track record, at least.  I don't know.  Me and my music teacher both share an affinity for Elliott Smith.  Not really the direction I wanna go in for my new music, though.  I'm thinking more like Guided By Voices.  You know, a minute and a half songs?  That's the main thing I like.  As long as my inspiration isn't guided by voices.  That's be no good!  Not on board with that!  Let's put that issue to rest.  Anyway, what the what.  Haven't been religiously watching late night comedy news talk shows as much as in the past.  I have more than enough time.  Just not into it.  Probably on account of I'ma music guy now.  Gotta get serious if I ever want a house in the suburbs of Nashville.
    Because my goals in life change every two hours.  And that's where I'm at during this two hour period!  Sweet.  Just lost 3 dollars.  Hmm, and a day and a half earlier than expected.  Anyway.  11th paragraph.  Gotta feel good about that.  Probably.  Anyway, jeez.  Got rid of that cigarette lighter.  Goodbye old friend.  Here's hoping you cause an explosion in the garbage truck where they do the trash compact thing to... compact the trash.  You know what I'm talking about.  The thing that Chucky killed a guy with in Child's Play III.  Let's get on board with each other.  I don't know.  I saw one of the brains behind Child's Play considers Child's Play III the clear weak link in the Child's Play Franchise.  He's way off.  It provides a good unique Child's Play Experience that I can really Get Behind.
    12th paragraph.  I like the idea of Busking but I don't like the idea of picking a spot.  You give me a spot, you say, go play guitar for 2 hours there, I'm on board!  Right now there's too many possibilities and unknowns.  Not on board with that one bit.  Also, don't like the word busking.  You call it something else, then you get back to me.  We'll see if we can work something out.  Anyway.  Gotta start looking for other Open Mics and places where I can book shows.  I like the Sidewalk Coffee a lot, but I gotta explore my options.  What else is going on.  I've got 55 minutes until I have to change the date.  That's a good way to measure how much more I ahve to write.  Changing that date is a real hassle.
    And not just for me.  You see an entry written Friday, you're thinking, Oh man, this was written 2 PM.  Or maybe 5 PM.  I can't wait.  Then, you're like, WAIT A SECOND... THIS WAS WRITTEN THURSDAY NIGHT.  I'VE PUT ALL THE PIECES TOGETHER AND THIS CAMPAIGN OF DECEIT IS REALLY GETTIN ME ITALICIZIED.  I don't know.  13th paragraph.  Or, maybe just go for 20.  I've given myself a lot to think about.  Gotta watch Conan at least.  He's my Go-To-Guy.  If only they'd get rid of that Andy Richter.  One can dream.  I don't know.  13th paragraph.  51 minutes till midnight.  Then I turn back into a pumpkin.  Not so bad being a pumpkin.  As long as it's not Halloween.  Then you're in loads of trouble.  Let's face it, you're in loads of trouble any month of the year if you're a pumpkin.  Let's Face It.
    14th paragraph.  Winter Olympics coming up.  Hey, you wanna watch some sports not entertaining enough to broadcast more than once every 4 years?  Nope.  What if I were to tell you it's Countries Playing Countries?  Nope.  Ok sorry.  What else is going on!  I guess just go for 15 paragraphs.  Time of the ending of the entry be damned.  I guess.  I gotta get up early!  Some guy is gonna fondle my testicles!  Need some good R & R for that.  Anyway, jeezz.  I don't know.  Tomorrow's Friday.  Thens the weekend.  Then Monday.  Monday is Open Mic Day!  Then is Tuesday.  You know what that's like right?  C'mon.
    Last paragraph.  I get to watch Conan tonight!  Sounds good.  It's a good thing to do at the end of weekdays when you have a routine.  No routine, can't get into it.  I've got a routine now!  Back into it!  What else is going on.  Not a lot.  Can't be, there's only room enough for 2/3rds of a paragraph.  That settles that and whatnot.  Anyway, jeez.  What fun was this.  Hit a wall a few sentences ago.  Now powering through it.  To finish this piece of crap.  I don't know.  I'll see ya later.

-11:31 P.M.
     

Friday, February 2, 2018

Title, Part II: The Reckoning

      Hey.  Gonna try to write entries on consecutive days.  Cool!  Let's see if I have it in me.  Saw Psychitrist today.  Got an Iced Latte on the way home!  I never had such a thing.  It's like Iced Coffee but different in some way, they assure me.  Two people told me to tie my shoes.  Psychitrist did, then I tied em.  Then, someone on line in Dunkin Donuts did.  I guess I didn't do such a good job tying them!  #EpikFails.  The Epic of Gilgamesh failed in keeping me entertaining.  Whose this guy Gilgamesh, and why do you expect me to care?  Let's talk about it.  I don't know.  I was gonna treat myself to a coffee coolata but that's not a thing anymore!  Whatta jip.
    Anyway, second paragraph.  What the what.  I think the Epik Memo should be one of those foldy things you do in grade school where you fold it and it tells you your fortune out of 8 possible things.  And the fortune we get is Do You Like Me Circle Yes or No.  That's an incompetent combining of two things!  They don't go together.  Maybe it's a game of MASH.  I hope I get to live in a house!  Why get greedy.  Not a lot of people live in shacks these days.  Lets talk about it.  Hey, I'm Gonna Marry My 7th Grade Chorus Teacher!  Things keep getting better and better.  My future job will be traffic cop!  Finally, I'll be getting some respect.  It's about time.  Well, clocks and calendars are, at least.
    Whatta Clunk.  Might see Winchester: The House That Ghosts Built today.  I could also see The Shape Of Water.  That sounds too tedious.  I wanna see a haunted house.  Nothin' complicated about that.  The Federal Bureau of Investigation is now under investigation.  Oh What a Delicious Twist Of Irony!  It seems the tables have turned.  Anyway.  You can't get upset about the FBI abusing it's power.  That's what it's there for.  Abusing their power is in their mission statement.  What do you expect.  Are we heading for a shutdown next week.  I haven't been kept abreast of the latest developments.  Hah.  Breast.  I like those things.
    Clunker!  Fourth paragraph.  I have until February 15 to apply to City College.  I should, but probably won't.  Whose got the time.  Not I.  I was thinking about it, and I think I'd rather be cremated than buried.  That way I can hang out with my family somewhere in their house.  Serve as a reminder that I was here and now I'm still here.  Sounds like fun to me.  Either that, or mummified.  Not sure if they still do that.  Seems like they should.  Also, grave plots are a lot of cash.  Why bother.  What else is going on.  Finished a bottle of alcohol last night.  Now I'm without alcohol.  See Movie today or tomorrow, get alcohol the other day.  Good to have plans in life.  I got em and whatnot.
    Fifth paragraph.  What the what.  I could see the movie at 3:20.  That sounds like a spooky time.  What's in the memo.  Nunes Business.  Nailed it.  Anyway, jeez.  Gotta get to 10 paragraphs I guess.  Gotta do something.  Doctor seemed to be behind the idea of getting my MFA.  With him in my corner, there's nothing I can't accomplish!  Except for all those things I can't accomplish.  But, besides them, nothing!  Watched  All Eyez On Me last night.  I had also seen the Notorious B.I.G. movie at some point.  Now I don't know what to think.  Hopefully watching Winchester: The House That Ghosts Built will clear things up.  Anyway, jeez.  Crap and crap.
    Halfway there!  Something about a prayer!  I don't have all the details.  Jeez.  I tricked my Dad into agreeing to drive me home from the theater.  So I'd only have to walk there.  I can walk to some place.  Can't walk home from that place, that'd be ridiculous.  Walk there, though, that I can handle.  Apparently the groundhog saw his shadow.  I feel like he always sees his shadow.  I'm not sure I trust him, or this whole process.  Anyway, jeez.  Also, there's always six more weeks of winter.  Six and a half, to be precise.  Even if the groundhog thinks there's six more weeks, he's still underselling it to some degree.
    Whatta jip!  What else.  Seventh paragraph.  If I apply for Creative Writing, I need 30-50 pages o fiction or nonfiction.  Well, just send 'em the best of crazysheet.  Hah!  I like that idea.  It makes me feel good inside.  Anyway.  I like going to movies.  Hey it's not my life for 2 hours.  That's a concept I can really dig.  Chop chop, Dig dig.  Anyway.  Alright, I'm gonna get back into writing.  I had hit a block for 15 minutes.  Now get back into it.  Only three and a half more paragraphs to go.  What do I got coming up.  Open Mic on Monday.  Hmm.  I guess that's it.  Whatta jip.
    I don't know.  Heh.  Nunes Business.  I Did It!  I don't like those commercials where kids are doing stuff on tablets and stuff and they go What's a Computer.  You know damn well what a computer damn well is.  Don't fuck around.  Also, those commercials where the girl becomes an engineer.  Get out of my face with that bullshit.  No one's doing that kind of stuff when they're kids.  Oh, you invented a machine to take out the garbage.  How long did you spend on that?  Lemme guess-- more time than it takes to take out the garbage over 5 or 10 years.  If you're so smart, how come you're not using your time efficiently?  Let me answer for you-- Not So Smart!  What do you mean it's a commercial.  Not a real person.  I saw a girl!  She turned into a woman at the end.  And fixed robots or something.
    Nunes Business.  Two paragraphs to go.  I won 33 cents yesterday but lost it trying to double up.  Can't sit at a table with 33 cents, so I figured I'd might as well flip a coin to double up.  Didn't!  Now I'm back where I started.  Except a day older.  That's one more day I could have been playing poker!  Whatta waste.  I don't like that exercise where you flip a coin to figure out mid-flip what it is you really want it to be.  Doesn't work with me.  I still can't decide mid-flip!  I still usually feel bad about whatever it is.  Heads, Tails, doesn't matter.  I'm always disappointed.
    That's me.  How come no one robs arcades.  They could get a shitload of quarters.  And a lot of crappy prizes.  Cause they'd steal the tickets, too.  Ya see it's a joke because they're stealing from it but they still obey the rules to use tickets to get the prizes.  C'mon, try to keep up.  Hey, it's the last paragraph.  Wonderful.  I think this Iced Latte made me sick.  Too much milk for my system.  Anyway.  I don't know.  Only got 4 or 5 hours of sleep last night.  Compared to my usual 12 or 13 hours.  Anyway.  I'll see ya later.

-11:11 P.M. 

Thursday, February 1, 2018

Back In Action!

      Hey folks.  Accumulated 2 or three throwaway "jokes" since last entry.  1)  My grandfather didn't fight in Wayne's World II just to see a guy like Trump become president.  Wonderful.  2)  You gotta remember, we're living in a post 7-11 world.  Even better!  Well, see ya!  Pretty sure I had a couple of other things but I forget.  Jeez.  February is here.  Hey, I offically graduated from Queens College!  And you all doubted me.  Now on to bigger and better things.  Like a college with a bigger campus.  And a better campus subjectively.  I dunno.  I tried making a list of all possible things I can do now.  1) Film MFA 2) Screenwriting MFA 3) Creative Writing MFA 4) Do music with lessons 5) do music without lessons 6) write crazysheet/prose 7) UCB improv class.  Hmm.  That's about it.  "Job?"  Whatsa "Job?"
    My Aunt and Uncle gave me a very generious graduation gift, so that could go towards lessons or improv or some other bullshit I can do to prolong my life of sloth.  Heh.  Sloth.  Sounds like the wrong word, but is it?  Maybe it is, hmm.  Sleth?  Sludge?  Now I'm confused.  Anyway, jeez.  Democrats losing ground in Generic Ballot for Congress.  Still doin' okay in Specialty Ballots.  Which is when you run for congress with truffles and A1 steak sauce.  A1 Steak Sauce?  Is that the best reference I can pull?  I think it's pretty obvious that it is.  I want to work as a waiter in a diner just waiting for the moment for someone to order something wit A1 Steak Sauce and I'll go You Sunk My Battle Ship.  It'll take a while and a lot of hard work, but the point is it pays off eventually.
    Bingo.  That's another way to go.  Can we all agree Battleship is the worst?  I can't remember ever having fun playing Battleship.  Also, these aren't submarines.  You can see battleships clearly on the field/sea of battle.  Anyway, jeez, I don't know.  Whats this, the third paragraph?  I can probably get to 10.  No money on poker to keep me occupied.  Whatta jip.  Pretty sure Trump's rising approval ratings are just an example of Stockholm Syndome.  And by that I mean the healthy stock market.  Wow!  Jeez.  Sure, the stock markets going great, the economy is going good.  But it's all going to the rich and corporations.  Don't get fooled.  Don't be a chump. 
    What else.  Fourth paragraph.  I watched Braveheart last night.  Ehh, I've seen braver.  Which is the sequel to Brave.  Which I never saw.  But am pretty sure is a movie.  Probably about an American Indian.  Someone singing national anthem.  The land of the free, and the home of the.... wait I just got a telegram.  It is no longer the home of the brave.  Now it's our home.  Anyway, jeez.  Gotta do something.  I'm going insane in the membrane spending the last 98% of the last month and a half in my room.  Whatta jip!  Pretty sure I've gotten all I can out of this room.  It's got the TV, the shelves with the DVDs.  A few pieces of furniture.  Neeext.
    Might try to get booked for another show.  Might not!  Who can say for sure.  Maybe pay one of those websites like 12 dollars a month where you get access to songwriting competitions and opportunities and whatnot.  It seemed like a good idea at first but upon further research turns out it's probably a scam.  Not on board with scams!  Maybe do better recordings of the songs I've been playing at Open Mic.  I've been gettin' some good feedback on them.  Just don't have the discipline to sit down and do it.  Oh well, such is life.  Tried playing a Video Game last night, see where that takes me.  Was no fun!  Grand Theft Auto III.  So violent.  You run over 30 people within 2 minutes of playing it.  I'm not on board with that!  I guess I could just steal a taxi and drive people around.  That's just a rip off of Crazy Taxi, thought.  And the Simpsons version of Crazy Taxi.  Which I forget what it was called.
    Crazy, eh?  A mix of Cranberry Juice and Lazy.  That's me, alright.  Fifth paragraph.  Just Joshin', it's the sixth paragraph.  I don't believe it.  Anyway, jeez.  Gotta Psychatrist appointment tomorrow morning.  About time I get out of my house.  And talk to my new friend.  This is only the second time I've seen him.  He was pretty impressed when I was telling him about my music.  Gettin' a lot of good feedback about it.  Might go see that Winchester movie this weekend.  Been a while since I've seen a movie by myself.  But it's got Helen Mirran, and I'm a huge fan of seeing movies where the main character(s) are elderly.  Really takes the edge off.
    Don't take the edge off!  Suddenly, where you're at is the new edge!  Sounds dangerous.  Seventh paragraph.  I don't believe it.  It's been fun.  Solid D+ to A- range.  Depending on how generous you are.  I hope very!  Started looking back at the short plays I wrote for class last spring, in case I wanna apply to Screenwriting School.  Some good parts, some bad.  Could be worse.  Anyway.  That ain't gonna happen.  Whatta jip!  Anyway, crap and crap.  Thought of a few lines for Moleman Spec Script.  Moleman going, "What Did I Do To Deserve This," after something bad happens to him.  Moleman going down to tie his shoes and then he goes, "Now I Can't Get Back Up.".  So the point is I'm pretty much 80-90% done.
    Jeez.  Eighth paragraph.  I don't know.  Three paragraphs to go.  Wonderful.  Part of me thinks I could really knock some improvo out of the park.  But another part of me thinks I could completely clunk it up and be the worst in the class.  And another part of me thinks that's a waste of money.  And a fourth part of me is thinking about watching Spanglish in the background while I'm writing this entry.  There's no fifth part of me.  Don't be crazy.  I don't know.  The closed captioning in Spanglish is in Spanish.  For the English parts.  I guess they're really taking this bilingualism thing seriously.
    Two paragraphs to go!  Anyway.  I don't know.  Eating dinner in an hour and a half, two hours.  That's right, two dinners.  Consecutively.  Whatta jip.  The main appealing part of Improv Class is I would be doing something twice a week instead of once.  That's 100% more Things I'd Be Doing!  Sounds good to me.  The worst part is those games you do at the beginning of each class to loosen up.  Where you stand in a circle and count down form eight or something.  Feel like a real Chumpidiot doing these things.  Get's me in the opposite of loosening up.  My lasting memory of Improv Class is trying to end a scene that I was in.  Had nowhere to go in my mind, so I ran around in a circle and went back to the backline.  And the teacher was like, Umm, you can't do that.
    So I'd want to avoid that kind of situation is the point.  I don't know.  Tenth paragraph.  I made it!  What else.  Is Spanglish related to Lost In Translation.  I don't know what the point of that was.  Anyway.  Even the Spanish is in Spanish.  I would have thought the Spanish would be in English just to even things out.  Thanks a lot, Chain Migration.  I'd be strongly in favor of all immigration, but I'm concerned they'll take all the blog writing gigs that aren't paid and you do it yourself and no one cares.  Gotta be at least a few potential bloggers in every Immigration.  Anyway.  The DREAMer thing, thouhg, as a name, I don't like it.  More like a Nightmare from our perspective, who already live here.  But for them, it's still theoretically better than where they're from.  So let's get that positive attitude permeating our culture!
    I'll do another paragraph, sure.  I don't know, jeez.  I saw a word in English in the closed captioning and got all excited.  The word was, "Okay," and it said, "Okey."  Close enough!  I'm on board!  Jeez, what the what.  Not sure if I'm class of 2017 or class of 2018.  Probably 2018.  Whatta jip.  Anyway, what else is going on.  Got a whole lotta nothing to do when this entry is over.  It's okay, I'm geting used to it.  Anyway, what else.  Thinking about writing in Sharpie on the cover of my pocket notebook, E-Mail Mankindguy@gmail.com To Return.  Not because I want it returned in that situation.  Just because it'll make me feel good.  Really elevates the specialness of the whole note taking situation.
    Last paragraph!  Twelve!  Sounds about right.  It's a big number for me.  It's how many things there are in a thing.  I forget the details.  My Dad just came to talk to me while the Orgasm Scene was happening in Spanglish.  So, if he was paying attention, thinks I was just watching porn in the middle of the day without shame.  I can't even imagine.  Without Shame?  I didn't realize that was an option.  Alright, time to wrap it up.  Anyway.  Half of looking forward to Monday Open Mic has become looking forward to getting White Castle on my way home.  Both are fun.  That's how I feel.  Keeps the pressure off doing the open mic.  Cause I win either way.  See ya later!

-5:30 P.M.