Thursday, May 30, 2024

I Didn't See That Coming

    Hello!  Ten paragraphs to write!  On my part, at least.  Ten paragraphs to read on your end.  Our paths have diverged!  Better get crackin' on some jokes or something.  Stephen Colbert was the face of PISTACHIOS for a while.  How much money could they have possibly afforded to pay him.  Big Pistachio doesn't command that much Market Share.  How many people do you know that eat pistachios!  But Stephen Colbert is A, WHAT, B+ List CELEB?  He's on TV ALL THE TIME.  And back in the day he was Quite Culturally Relevant as well!  I think their slogan was Get Crackin'.  WHAT I GOTTA DO WORK NOW?  That's a dumb catch phrase!  I guess if you like pistachios you LIKE the Cracking Element of it.  It's part of what gets you off.  You fetishize the entire process.  EVEN the part where You Throw The One Out Of Nine Pistachios Away That You Can't De-shell.  There's some pistachios you get that are just too tough to deshell.  It's not uncommon.  Come across a pistachio here and there that The Shell Is Too Overgrown.  Nothing you can do!  What a waste!
    Probably ARE things you can do.  Surely there are tricks of the trade to get to them tough to access pistachios.  HMM.  What else do I got going on for me.  I got NOTHIN'!  Not sure there are any other Topics out there in the universe.  Nothing comes to mind!  There's this Guy who nods to me in the park every day.  Enthusiastic nod.  Like he knows me deep down to my soul and REALLY approves!  So I nod back like thanks I agree I'm doing my best!  Well, that's what I try to convey.  In truth I'm TIMID about it.  Kinda SHY and HESITANT with my nodding back in reality.  Maybe I should Nod Back At Him more like but what about you what's your story.  He's a person, too!  Let's ENGAGE that!  He sits on Park Bench in the afternoons waiting for Michael to walk by.  Possibly even there for Multiple Michael Passings a day!  But he must have a life OUTSIDE of Michael Walking By Him.  Trying to picture if he's doing Activities on the bench.  Maybe he's holding a drink?  A paper?  Hmm.  Sitting next to garbage bags sometimes.  That's not on him, though.  Transitory Property not in play there!
    Okay.  No one ever taught me how to nod to strangers on the streets.  I could be nodding in inappropriate ways this entire time.  Giving off completely wrong vibes and whatknot!  There's been a handful of times I've nodded to people and they get really upset and wanted to fight me.  Maybe those were isolated times and its ON THEM or maybe I've been nodding Aggressively Like I Wanna Fight People this whole time!  I'VE JUST BEEN WINGING THESE HEAD MOVEMENTS.  All I want is PEACE.  Can't we just walk by each other IN GOODWILL.  I dunno.  I've walked by A LOT OF PEOPLE in my life.  Must have been SOME people I Wanted To Fight.  Gotta be a couple of hundred times I Nodded At People And Would Have Been Happy For It To Get Physical!  I guess.  Anyway.  IN THE MOMENT when the guy suddenly wanted to fight me because I Nodded At Him Wrong, obviously I wanted to just get out of there as soon as possible.  BUT, looking back on it-- I dunno!  Maybe next time I Wanna Fight Him!  What's the worst that could happen.  The guy beats me up.  SO WHAT.  At least it's a new kind of experience!
    Fourth paragraph.  Therapist is always saying I need to try new things.  Get into fights with mentally unbalanced pedestrians!  Good.  Hmm.  The point is I DON'T BACK DOWN.  I STAND BY MY INADVERTENT AGRO NOD.  If I don't stand by my actions WHO WILL.  Whatever.  Fourth paragraph!  Let's see.  What kind of delicious dinner do I got in store for me tonight.  Could be a hamburger!  That's what I was imagining earlier!  Right now it seems a little too Heavy, though.  Might be a bit too INTENSE.  But there's a good chance three or four hours from now I WANT a more comprehensive meal like a Hamburger perhaps with some freedom fries.  I can't tell the future!  Probably listen to Shipping Up To Boston some more.  We know THAT much!  That's been fun.  I'M DEBATING deleting this paragraph.  THIS PARAGRAPH AIN'T SHIT.  Nothing happened!  NAME ME A SINGLE THING THAT HAPPENED IN THIS PARAGRAPH.  Ya can't do it, can ya! I know Practically Nothing Never Happens, but this paragraph, man, THIS paragraph... THAT TAKES THE CAKE.
    Fifth paragraph!  Anyway.  I kept the paragraph because It's Hard To Write Paragraphs and I REALLY gotta get to 10 paragraphs somehow!  I'm in a really sticky situation so you'll have to excuse me for Wasting Yer Time with crap And Whatknot!  Oh No Six To Go.  Ugh.  Maybe I just Watch The Departed.  That's not a terrible idea.  It's a COMMENTARY on The End Of The Cinema these days.  It's DYING.  MOVIES ARE OVER people are saying.  Everyone's saying it!  Only Mark Wahlberg has survived!  Rings true to me.  IS there a New Kinds On The Block song I Know And Love.  I BELIEVE I had Hang Tough on my High School Mp3 Player.  It's QUITE possible.  Did all these kids arrive on the block AT THE SAME TIME.  What are the odds of that.  Are they FOSTER SIBLINGS or something?  They're not straight up related are they?  Well there's a couple sets of brothers.  And then some strays.  But they're not ALL related.  I don't get it!  Hey out of nowhere We're A Bunch Of Different New Kids On The Block.  What The HELL.  And also they're all immediately allied up MUSICALLY AT LEAST against the rest of the neighborhood.  Hmm.  Seems odd.
    Halfway through the entry!  HEY looks like I'm getting Chinese Food for dinner tonight.  No hamburger at all!  Hmm.  Guess I'll go with my GOTO Treasures of the Land And Sea most likely.  CHICKEN IS A TREASURE OF TEH LAND said NO ONE EVER.  Dumb menu.  Friggin idiot.  Whatever.  Why complain about things I have no control over!  Might as well focus on things I can change!  LIKE WHAT.  I dunno.  I can't change anything!  EVERYTHING IS LOCKED INTO PLACE.  Universe is set in stone!  That's my theory.  Let's just ENJOY THE RIDE.  Maybe.  Who knows.  I don't really believe that.  I SAY the next 48 hours are set in stone but BEYOND THAT WE GOT WIDE SPACE TO RUN WILD AND DO OUR BEST TO GO AHEAD AND TRY TO DO WHAT WE WANNA.  Sounds about right.  Manifest That Reality You Want Yo!  GET IT!  ...HOLY CRAP TEHRE'S A VERDICT.  WHAT TE HELL.  WHAT DO I DO.  I CAN'T CONTINUE WRITING TE ENTRY.  I GOTTA READ ABOUT TIS VERDICT AND WHATKNOT.  Anyway.  Yeah.  I'll pick up with the entry in a little bit!  See ya soon!

    Hey!  THAT SUCKER IS GUILTY 34/34 TIMES.  So that was fun!  Then I took a walk.  And reflected on his being a Conflicted Felonitude some more.  Which was more fun.  THEN we ordered some Chinese Food!  NOW I'M HERE.  Won't fit in THE ENTIRE rest of the entry before the food comes.  BUT I'LL FIT IN SOME.  Anyway.  Hmm.  If You Can't Do The Time Don't Do The Crime!  That's my feeling.  He might not have to do Time.  But he'll have to do SOMETHING.  There will be some sort of Sentencing.  What's the Literal Littlest Sentence Possible.  We know there needs to be a Subject and a Verb.  Hmm.  If people are this excited abuot him being found guilty, imagine how freaked out people would be if he's sentenced to jail.  THE MEMES.  IMAGINE THE MEMES.  I ought to start thinking about some Appropriate picture sharing memes NOW.  Get in on the ground level.  BE AHEAD OF THE GAME FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE.
    Eighth paragraph!  UCB Stand Up Class has only Five Slots remaining.  Before today it did not say how many slots it had remaining.  That tells me someone recently signed up for the class!  Good stuff.  Anyway.  Can EXILE be a form of Community Service?  Maybe he can be under House Arrest like Uncle Junior in The Sopranos.  That sort of lifestyle.  I'd be a proponent of that!  Anyway.  This Is All Good News And Everything but at some point we have to move on with our lives!  Hmm.  LIFE eh.  Sounds interesting.  What's THAT.  Life is what happens when you're busy making other plans.  I think that quote was attributed to John Lennon.  Sounds too stupid for John Lennon.  I give John Lennon more credit than that!  Anyway I feel PERSONALLY ATTACKED because if you go by John Lennon's theories I HAVE NO LIFE.  Because NOTHING EVER INTERRUPTS MY PLANS.  I make my dumb plans, maybe they half manifest maybe they don't, AND THAT'S IT.  NO LIFE.  WHAT LIFE.  WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT JOHN LENNON.  Huh.
    Penultimate paragraph!  Let's see.  Looking forward to some reading this weekend.  Got WHITE rice tonight.  Not pork fried rice!  Sure.  Maybe I should look for my Cop & A Half DVD to watch tonight.  Because I am in the mood to celebrate LAW AND ORDER.  The CONCEPT moreso not exactly the branch of the government.  Sure I'd want Devon Butler to put the cuffs around Trump but that's just not feasible!  EVEN IF IT COULD HAPPEN he'd be an adult man now so it'd lose most of its charm!  I DUNNO.  Maybe they should reboot Cop and a Half with the original Half Cop but now he's a Full Cop BUT he's lost faith in the system and he meets a New Half Kid Cop and is reinvigorated with Spirit And Enthusiasm And Fun and whatknot.  Burt Reynolds is dead now so we can't have him in this project but it works without him!  ANYWAY my Chinese Food came and I ate a small egg roll in the mean time.  Eat actual dinner later!  Write one last paragraph now!
   Hmm.  Let's see.  I SEE the Cop & A Half DVD Box.  Now I will APPROACH it to see if there's a DVD in there.  YEP.  It's there!  It's a crapshoot whether my XBOX 360 will actually work any given time though.  So maybe I try to watch it at some point over this four day weekend!  WELL ANYWAY.  It's too bad Trump can't say that the charges in this case were trumped up.  Because that's his name!  It'd be awkward phrasing!  Gotta come up with a slightly different words to use.  Looks like things aren't quite going his way RE: WORDS.  I guess from now on when someone says Charges Were Trumped Up that means Oh So You Mean The Person's Guilty Then?  GOTTEM.  Anyway.  Guess I got a walk after this.  Then maybe chillax for a bit.  THEN eat.  Should be a pretty decent nighttime.  I'll see ya next week/month! 

-7:03 P.M.                 
     
   
         
      

Wednesday, May 29, 2024

What Happened Today Again

    What's up friends!  Got some Entry coming at ya!  Started watching a Robin Williams movie from the 1980's where he plays a USSRman who defects to the United States (of America).  Really makes ya think.  OLDTIME COLDWAR DICHOTOMIES!  What Dichotomies are we operating under today. Hmm.  We got lots of dichotomies but can they all be boiled down to ONE.  WELL.  WHAT IS IT.  WHAT'S THE DICHOTOMY.  Oh I know.  Zeroes and Ones.  It's COMPUTER LANGUAGE.  Everything is either a Zero or a One.  I guess.  Zeroes have more CHARACTER but Ones have more SELF WORTH.  My instinct is to identify with The Thing With More Character.  Because I lack Self Esteem!  But if I accumulate enough character suddenly look whose got some self esteem by nature of having Some Nice Characteristics!  ME that's who!  I'm playing the long game!  Anyway.  What if we started writing Binary Codes with 2's and 3's as well.  Now anything is possible.  I just BROKE THE GAME WIDE OPEN.  Computer Science will never be the same.  GOOD.  I wasn't happy with the direction Computer Science was going in!  WHEW.
    Okay.  Probably just made things worse to be honest.  AH WELL.  The important thing is that I Showed Up and Put My Best Foot Forward.  Anyway sure I lied to my therapist today just out of laziness.  Yep.  Still only been smoking marijuana at night like I've been doing Previously is what I said to her.  There's no POINT in elaborating Truthfulness.  WHO CARES that I smoked marijuana all week for one week and a lot for another week during the last month.  LET'S JUST GET THIS OVER WITH.  THIS SESSION MEANS NOTHING.  Then again do I really wanna normalize LYING TO AUTHORITY FIGURES?  YES.  Oh.  Alright then!  Hmm.  Never know when that might come in handy.  Why do I see my therapist as an Authority Figure.  Well what other kinda archtypes ya got.  FRIEND?  Nah.  MENTOR?  No.  THERAPIST?  Shut it.  I think one day I'm gonna experiment with Going Off All Meds and Fucking Off With Pointless Light Therapy As Well.  But I might have to wait until my parents are dead.  Cause they ain't gonna be down with that.  So that could be fifteen years from now.  THE COUNTDOWN BEGINS NOW.
  OH NO I JUST REALIZED my parents probably WON'T both live an entire 15 years now that I think about it.  At first I went into that sentence WANTING them to die.  Now I came out of that sentence WANTING THEM TO LIVE.  I DID AN ENTIRE 270.  Hmm.  How about this-- I want my parents to live, but live SEPARATELY FROM ME.  LIVE from a distance from me!  Let's GO.  Anyway.  I feel like I've had two separate childhoods.  I had regular Childhood, and then I had Post Sickness Adulthood Childhood.  I got mentally sick in college, came back home and lived with my parents for 15 years, and that was a SECOND SHOT AT CHILDHOOD.  New perspectives and new relationships and everything!  Just an entirely different 2nd childhood!  And in essence even though I was in 20's and 30's I've basically Been A Child Yet Again this go-around again.  I call 'em like I see 'em!  Anyway getting close to Theoretical Metaphysical High School Graduation!  WHAT HAPPENS WHEN I GRADUATE?  I DON'T KNOW.  I really hope I become an adult this time around but it's certainly possible I become a child for A Third Time!
   Hmm.  Fourth paragraph.  Being an adult is HARD.  Or so I've heard.  Anyway.  Maybe being a child is hard, too!  Adults never thought about THAT, have they!  That's cause it's inaccurate.  Being a child is easy.  Oh Okay That Checks Out.  That might even be in my definition of what being a Child is.  Child by nature DOES WHAT'S EASY.  That sounds about right.  Doesn't mean the child's life is always easy!  Just means that's what they aims for!  ANYWAY THIS IS ALL CONJECTURE.  I DON'T KNOW WHAT WORDS MEAN.  I AM NOT THE DICTIONARY.  AND I NEVER WILL BE.  Probably not.  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  They added Negro League Stats to All Time Leaderboard Stats.  So now there's new people who hold Records compared to before.  WOW.  I think Baseball should be concerned by How Little I Care.  I mean, they obviously don't want people to be Angry and/or Upset about it.  But at the same time if it elicits EXTREME Indifference that's emblematic of ANOTHER PROBLEM.  The problem is I and perhaps others Don't Care Enough About Baseball History!  Oh no! 
    Huh.  Fifth paragraph!  Almost halfway through the entry.  That's pretty good news for me.  Just one more paragraph until I'm halfway through!  Anyway.  Everyone likes Children.  People like a Childish Adult.  But you gotta be an Adult underneath it all!  Ya gotta have ADULT HARDWARE with Childish Gleam, not the other way around!  Something like that.  I dunno.  I MAY BE WONG that everybody likes a Childish Adult.  People like people who don't take things too seriously I think!  That's the message I'm picking up on from Television And The Like!  How much of my life lessons have I Picked Up From Television And The Like.  That's a tough one.  From SECOND Childhood?  Practically ALL of my life lessons!  First childhood I went to School!  Picked up life lessons there!  And you really can't learn much of anything from TV.  It's DUMB.  Anything you think you learn from TV could be a TRICK.  Take anything you learn from TV with a grain of SALT.  If I learnt anything from TV its probably don't put your trust in TV to guide you through life!  I Didn't learn Anything from TV.  So I DIDN'T learn that.  Nothing!
    Halfway through the entry!  I did it.  Whatever I did, I only have to do One Equal Part More and then I'm Done!  Looks like I got good odds for Italyish Restaurant for dinner tonight!  Sounds like Eggplant Pizza then.  Eggplant is Hearty and Savory.  Good!  What books do I got going on after Kathy "As Her Friends Call Her" Hanna book.  The Jeff Tweedy book where he writes chapters about individual songs he likes AND The Dave Grohl Memoir.  Good!  I bought those books for a reason.  With intent to read them for pleasure!  Not sure how I feel about Dave Grohl.  There are people who don't like him-- on the internet!-- and for some reason I am slightly susceptible to their point of view.  What exactly IS their point of view.  Is it based on his Technical Skill as a musician.  Or as a BUSINESSMAN.  Or as a PERSON.  I don't know any of that.  All I know is that some people don't like him and for some reason 25% of me goes YEAH THEY GOT A POINT.  I BUY INTO DAVE GROHL DISLIKE a quarter of the way!  I'm only admitting this because a clear majority of me OUTNUMBERS The Wrong Part Of Me so if it ever came to some sort of Conflict I'M STILL ON PRESUMABLY THE RIGHT SIDE OF THINGS.  Still would be a Force For Good in favor of Dave Grohl in a Dave Grohl Dispute!
    Then again I really should hold off until I read this book to commit to a side!  I dunno!  ANYWAY Seventh Paragraph!  WHAT ELSE is up.  Maybe I get regular pizza.  Maybe I get Sicilian pizza.  Regular.  Rectangle.  Regular.  Rectangle.  Hmm.  What would Jesus do.  Why do people need wristbands that say WWJD.  IF YOU CAN'T REMEMBER the phrase What Would Jesus Do and you need a Band to consult, You Got Problems!  Bad Memory Man.  If you didn't have the wristband would you be like THERE WAS SOMEONE I USED TO WORSHIP AND EMULATE... WHO WAS IT... AH WELL.  Moving on!  Also, What Jesus Would Do in any given situation is ALMOST ALWAYS beyond your powers.  He'd probably multiply the pizza by a thousand and treat the entire storefront.  You CAN'T do that.  Don't worry about what Jesus Would Do because you CAN'T EVEN DO IT IF YOU WANTED.  WWJSYDWYLA. What would Jesus Suggest You Do Within Your Limited Abilities.  Probably get the Sicilian Pizza.  Is Rome in Sicily.  He has complicated relationship with Rome per my recollection.  Rome is definitely not in Sicily.  If I was Jesus I would have known that.  He knows everything!  He'd have CLEANED UP on Who Wants To Be A Millionaire.  OK.
   Eighth paragrpah.  Except for the fact that He Probably DOESN'T Want To Be A Millionaire.  He'd get the answers right but he Doesn't want the cash prize!  Hmm.  What else is going on.  What WOULD happen if you started the 100 Dollar Question and told Regis Off The Bat, I'm happy to play the game, but I Do Not Want To Be A Millionaire!  Shall we continue Anyway?  I dunno!  I don't think it ever happened!  Anyway.  I was recently thinking about the Whose Line Is It Anyway Drew Carey Slogan Where Everything's Made Up And The Points Don't Matter and I realized that applies to Life Itself.  In a really Anarchic and Scary way!  But OH WELL.  That's life I guess!  No one knows better than they do.  It was news to me, though!  Hmm.  Only two more paragraphs to go!  Today's entry was a solid Five out of Twelve!
    Okay.  Got ten minutes left of The Wire Season II before I get to... The Wire Season III!  Anyway.  After tomorrow I got a nice Three Day Weekend from The Website.  Do some reading and catch up with The Bikini Kill Ma'am.  I like her AS A PERSON and AS A BOOK.  How many pages are we talking I'll accomplish this weekend.  I'm gonna estimate 150!  WOW.  WWJR.  Did Jesus READ or was he illiterate.  What would have been the point of Jesus Reading.  Seems redundant.  But on the other hand Jesus Not Knowing How To Read seems scandalous.  What was there even to read at the time.  Dead Sea Scrolls?  Hmm.  Must have at least known how to sign his name.  Can't just sign an X.  Not Jesus!  I don't know what that means.  I am getting further and further from Being Good And Entertaining in this entry BUT I am getting closer and closer to Being Done.  INTERESTING differential equations and whatknot going on.  If you knew math you'd see all the pieces in your head in a fascinating way.  And if you don't know math You'd Just Be Dumb Like Me so there's that I guess.
   Last paragraph!  Let's see.  We hear about Differential Equations in Calculus all the time but HOW ABOUT SOME SIMILARLIKE EQUATIONS.  THAT'S what people wanna hear about!  Yeah!  Anyway!  Hmm.  You know what I'm gonna spend 2.5 minutes listening to for my next upcoming walk when this is done?  SHIPPING UP TO BOSTON.  By The Dropkick Murphies.  As made famous by director Martin Scorsese in The Departed.  That's gonna be fun.  Yeah.  Might even listen to it TWICE now that I think about it.  That's gonna be twice as fun!  Not sure what I'll THINK ABOUT CONSCIOUSLY while it's going on.  It'll pump me up about SOMETHING-- not sure what yet!  But anyway FAIR WARNING!  Martin SCORE-Sese.  It's in the score of The Departed.  Says he.  What's going on again.  What if someone read this.  Hmm.  Never thought about it that way.  Anyway that'll do it for now!  See ya tomorrow!

-5:26 P.M.     
     

Tuesday, May 28, 2024

Not Sure How I Feel About That

    Hi!  The time has come to write a new entry.  Ten paragraphs from now the time will come to end a new entry!  Huh.  What the HELL is going to Fill 'Er Up.  I chose not to wear socks today.  I have no good reason!  I can't justify my actions to society!  But I'm pretty sure I will suffer no consequences So Whatever!  I had cup o noodles and wheat thins for lunch today.  It was good!  My method of eating Cup O Noodles is save 2/3rds of the noodles for the end.  Have some noodles here and there, but mostly slurp the water and then once the water is gone that's when I eat the noodles up.  Texturewise and Heatwise,  that's when noodles are at their best!  After 5-10 Minutes In!  Not sure what the reasoning for abbreviating OF is.  "O'" is the same amount of characters as, "OF."  I don't like it!  Cup O' Noodles might be a Fan Creation of a name.  I dunno if they ever actually ever called it that themselves. WE MADE THAT UP OURSELVES.  I'm looking online and every reference to the product just says Cup Noodles. Huh.  It's been called CUP NOODLES this whole time.  No OF.  No O'.  Just Cup Noodles.  Gotta remember that for futuresake.
    Wow!  Now even The High E String on the guitar is making sense.  Guitar is back in action!  When ya press down on High E String Third Fret its the only note that still has some inappropriate Twang to it.  But besides that WOW!  There's roughly 5-7 people across the 5 seasons of The Wire who explicitly brag about having small cocks.  It's a recurring theme.  Often within the context of jerking off.  "I WAS MASTURBATING LAST NIGHT WITH MY THREE AND A HALF INCHES OF DICK AND I'M REAL HAPPY ABOUT IT."  And it happens across different contexts and demographics and scenarios.  Not sure if the writers even realized that they were introducing a Theme or if it was just on their minds constantly and they didn't realize they had mentioned it several times before already.  Either way I guess it's good that they got the discussion started!  What discussion.  Not so much a discussion as just Empowering people who are less endowed.  Couldn't HURT I guess.  What if they go on to use their power for evil.  Well then I guess it hurt then.
     ALL POWER is used for evil.  Name ONE use of power that was for good.  I'LL WAIT.  ...MELINDA GATES FOUNDATION.  I DON'T KNOW WHAT THAT IS.  CAPTAIN PLANET.  I don't remember.  The time Stone Cold Steve Austin came out of nowhere and stone cold stunned The Rock leading to Mankind pinning him and winning the WWF Championship belt.  THE SUN.  The sun gives power INDISCRIMINATELY and a lot of it is PLAINLY NOT SO BAD.  Helps out trees and plants live and that's just off the top of my head!  And trees and plants never hurt anybody.  Except for that Nickelodeon action gameshow where the trees sometimes GRAB contestants out of nowhere and then they're disqualified.  Tricky Trees!  Oh!  TREES.  That's what I'd like to call marijuana.  I was wondering what I'd like to call marijuana either Publicly Or Privately recently and IT JUST HIT ME.  I'd like to call marijuana Trees in certain situations.  And maybe elevate that at some point to most situations!  It's fun!  I didn't come up with that.  That's what one friend used to call it.  Hmm.  Wonder what he's up to.  Probably alive!  YES.
    Ugh.  Fourth paragraph.  Okay.  Not happy about capitalizing quoting The Wire about them masturbating with small dicks.  Because that means when you browse through the website, and see the capitalized phrases first, you're gonna latch onto that one, and not register I was QUOTING A TV SHOW, and think I'M JUST SAYING IT MYSELF.  And think I GOT THAT SMALL DICK.  That's not the kind of message I'm trying to put out there!  Unless if its funny.  Or POIGNANT.  I'll put a message out there if its POIGNANT, sure, why not!  But in general NO DON'T THINK THAT.  I added quotation marks around the phrase but IS THAT ENOUGH to clarify things?  I don't know!  Only time will tell!  Gonna start my stopwatch NOW.  Here We go!  What else is up.  OFTEN do I look back on an entry and see The Capitalized Phrases and think OH NO DO THESE PHRASES REALLY REPRESENT TEH BEST OF TE ENTRY AND WHO I AM?  Cause they're the parts people are gonna remember!  The words All In Caps are what gonna Outlive Us All!  I should probably Just Keep That In Mind going forward when I write.  WRITE PURPOSEFULLY THUSLY.  For future entries just write with INTENT such that I'm writing Good Capital Phrases and that's my goal.  HUH.  I DON'T KNOW.  MAYBE!
    Fifth paragraph.  Capitals mean I'm Yelling.  Sort of.  Sometimes!  Could mean different things.  WHATEVER.  Let's keep going.  Yellowing.  YEAH.  When Coldplay says Look at the stars Look how they shine for you There's one star YOU SHOULDN'T LOOK AT and it's Our Own Star The Sun.  Hmm.  Anyway.  Fifth paragraph.  I plead the fifth!  No I don't.  I've got nothing to hide.  I'll answer all your questions to the best of my recollection.  Bad news for you is I Can't Recollect A THING.  Not being able to do monologues in Improv proved as much.  I'll be up on the witness stand and be like CAN I GET A ONE WORD SUGGESTION FOR WHAT I MIGHT TESTIFY ABOUT.  Still come up with NADA.  NADA makes me think of this commercial that was on Disney Plus last year I THINK for cell phones.  And it was about I think Signing Contracts.  And it was like you don't wanna sign contracts that Say Nada or Yada Yada Yada.  I DON'T REMEMBER.  SEE THIS IS WHY I DON'T DO IMPROV MONOLOGUES.  But the point is that was a good commercial whatever it was about.  Halfway through the entry!
    Wow.  I tried to start watching VEEP a couple of weeks ago but it was Too Much!  I watched a couple of seasons back in the day.  I don't think I watched all of it.  But anyway I enjoyed the humour and appreciated the skills involved by all who participated but it's just A LOT going on!  So I dunno.  ON THE OTHER HAND I have a Subway Sandwich for dinner tonight.  Your standard turkey and ham sandwich!  Nothing complicated with that.  There's cheese on it.  That's slightly complicated.  I guess.  What does VEEP stand for?  Very EEEEEmportant Person?  Hmm.  Maybe I shuold see the new MAD MAX movie.  I don't wanna watch the latest one before this one Beforehand.  Just go see this one and if it doesn't make sense to me THAT'S ON THEM.  Hmm.  I dunno.  There was the scene where the people play double decker guitars in the front of Jeeps or something.  That's probably half accurate.  That should be enough info to get me started for watching The New Film.
   Seventh paragraph!  Is DESERTED and DESERT in the same family of word.  YES deserts may oft be deserted but it's not BY NATURE synonymous.  There's nothing INHERENT about Deserts that says BY IT'S NATURE ITS GONNA BE DESERTED.  SOMEONE GET MIRIAM WEBSTER ON THE PHONE.  Gonna give her a piece of my mind!  Hopefully one of those pieces we don't really need!  Otherwise THAT'S A BIG MISTAKE ON MY PART.  Whatever.  Let's see.  It just ain't Subway without Sun Chips.  I DON'T HAVE NO SUNCHIPS with my Subway Sandwich tonight!  Got some Jalapeno Ranch Ruffles.  That'll do!  Hmm.  People TWENTY YEARS FROM NOW will be reading, "I Don't Have No Sunchips."  I gotta be more careful about the Capitalized Phrases I Use!  Going forward I gotta GO INTO ENTRIES thinking WHAT WILL I WRITE THAT'S CAPITALIZED.  Don't even Think At All about NONCAPITALIZED phrases.  Pay them no nevermind!  Not a second thought!  GIVE CAPITALIZED PHRASES ALL THE CONSIDERATION I've been giving In General To What I Give Everything As Of Now.  FROM NOW ON THE CAPITALIZED IS WHAT COUNTS.  Everything else is for the birds.  Maybe I guess I dunno that's one way to approach things couldn't hurt to mix things up or something I'm not really gonna do that.
    Three paragraphs to go. Hmm.  I had an interesting thought last night.  What if I wrote entries LATE AT NIGHT.  We're talking NINE, TEN PM.  I spend the days LIVING MY BET LIFE and then write the entries at night before bed after having accumulated Experience and Insight throughout the day.  In THEORY it sounds right.  But in PRACTICE it sounds impractical.  So there's that.  The routine I have has been working for a long time!  But on the other hand, there's a million different ways to do things!  So if I ever wanna change it up, that's certainly always an option there for me!  In the meantime lemme just keep doing the dumb thing I've been doing.  Whatever.  Let's just figure out a way to finish up this D+ entry.  WOW.  D+.  I like the looks of that Plus.  Really making me feel good about the whole thing.  How come no WOMEN in The Wire ever talk about the size of their dicks.  Just occurred to me!  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.
   Penultimate paragraph.  SOCIETY that's why.  How so.  Not sure exactly.  Probably society though.  Hmm.  Do Sunchips get their awesome snack power from The Sun.  Because if so score another win for The Sun.  ANY UPDATE on Movie Project with My Brother?  I Dunno!  He should be coming over for Fater's Day and he'll probably be bringing his camera then and might be taking shots then!  I dunno if he's got any sort of Documentary Prompts prepared, though!  I'm ready though I guess.  I'll be myself to the best of my ability.  Not really.  IN FACT I'll be pretty POOR at being myself.  Really disappoint my future self and whatknot when I look back on the footage that was compiled.  Unless he's a superstar at getting the most out of Documentry Subjects.  Could be he's a Natural!  I SAY HE'S A WUNDERKIND at Documentarian specifically in terms of making people look like their best selves for some reason.  So that's good.
   Last paragraph!  Wow!  Another entry in the books.  And all I had to do was subject people to Crap.  Seems like a fair trade-off!  Gotta get up early tomorrow for Therapy appointment.  Fifteen Minute of Light Therapy.  By which I mean Social Worker doing un-intense therapy.  I don't mean some form of Therapy involving Lamps.  Although that sounds interesting.  Gotta get some blood work done.  Pick up cigarettes for Mater.  Two more entries for the week.  Then THREE MORE WEEKS of entries before Stand Up Class starts.  Then WHO KNOWS what Life Then Will Look Like.  Probably a lot like What Without It Looks Like.  Oh Ok.  Huh.  Maybe I do POLITICAL stand up.  Have you heard the news about politics.  Don't like it.  NONE OF IT.  That's not funny.  Not YET.  I'll get there maybe!  Anway.  Gotta do stand up about SOMETHING.  THERE MUST BE CONTENT.  Hmm.  Anyway that's it for today!  See ya tomorrow!

-4:55 P.M.         

           
    

Monday, May 27, 2024

How Dare I Write This Entry

    Hey, friends!  I had my 201 Improvement Class Show on Saturday.  I survived.  I did the thing and came out the other end intact!  I remember a couple of laughlines I got but the one that I specifically remember was when I only got But A Single Laugh but it was a Female Laugh and I was like, in my head, that was a sexy laugh.  Man oh man.  THINGS JUST GOT INTERESTING.  I HOPE that was In My Head.  If I said that thought out loud no one acknowledged it at least.  Hmm.  I dunno about a SEXY laugh.  IT was a CUTE laugh.  Didn't see who it came from exactly.  Either way SHOW WAS A SUCCESS.  I got something I didn't even know I was looking for out of it!  Cute Girl Laugh.  Hmm.  In the end I had a moment or two of Complete Blankness but also a moment or two of relative, "I Got This!"ness which canceled each other out!  Rest of classmates did pretty good.  I'd recommend they continue on with their Lives if that's something they have an interest in doing.  Yeah!
    I signed up for a UCB Stand Up Comedy class but the twist is its over ZOOM.  Monday Evenings!  Starting in four weeks!  YES.  Should be good.  I think I can excel in a Remote Learning type scenario.  In the comfort of my own Room and whatknot I can really knock some Stand Up out of the Place.  And, if not, then, who cares!  That's a lot of commas for one short sentence.  Probably too much.  Anyway.  What have I done during my two weeks off from Entry Writing.  Smoking marijuana!  I experimented with smoking a lot of marijuana!  I went a week with basically smoking marijuana 80% of the day all day all week!  VERY INTERESTING EXPERIMENT.  Some positive results, some negative!  Then the next week was More Marijuana Than Usual but not all the time.  NOW HERE I AM BACK AT IT IN THE USUAL WAY I GUESS.  Huh.  Also, the first week, I tried working on Some Music.  Made SOME progress I guess.  But in I dunno if I wanna explore music that much.  TOO introspective.  Let's leave some feelings buried I say!  They're deep down underneath for a reason.  Let's leave 'em there!
    Got a few new books.  Started reading Kathleen Hanna of The Bikini Kills: The Book.  It's good!  I like it!  I had never listened to the band until Just Now but it's FINE.  It's growing on me at a rapid rate!  I WENT FROM Not Getting The Appeal Really to Now I Understand And Appreciate The Joy Of Listening To It I Guess!  What else.  Started re-watching THE WIRE.  Good.  I DON'T LIKE THE POLICE.  Gotta watch a show so I can be HALFWAY sympathetic to cops.  Even things out!  Gotta be balance and The Wire provides as much!  The Cops don't come off as great in the show.  But they're still the protagonists.  I don't care how dumb they come off.  They're still the good guys.  The drug dealers are too.  Everyone's a protagonist.  Is that a Theory Of Storytelling.  Everyone Is The Protagonist.  SURE IT IS.  It's MY theory. I just introduced it Right Now.  IS there a specific word for People Who Don't Matter in stories.  People between protagonists and antagonists.  Ancillary Characters I guess.  Jerks.  The Great Unneeded.
   Huh.  I was doing fantasizing about what it'd be like to be Professional Comedian.  And I think IN PAST when I fantastisized about that it'd be me imagining doing clubs and whatknot in The City. BUT THIS TIME AROUND I was like what if I fantastizied about DOING THE ROAD.  And being in random towns for several days at a time and hanging out alone AND/OR with other comedians and whatknot.  THAT'D BE THE LIFESTYLE HUH.  HMM.  INTERESTING.  That TIME OFF.  DOWN TIME.  TEND TO YERSELVES.  So that's something to keep in mind.  What I learned from Improv class is that I CAN BE A COMEDIAN.  It's easy.  I don't even need great material or crowd work skills or stage prescience.  I can go on stage and bomb and do well enough and It's GOOD ENOUGH and Life Goes on.  I MAY have learnt the wrong lesson from Improv Classes.  But that IS sort of what I've been picking up.  Doesn't matter how good you are.  JUST DO IT and Who Cares!  Whatever you do is Good Enough.  It Has To Be!  But the point is, you put That Realization togehter with What if I DID write good material... and put in the time and effort and work to build up crowd work and other skills.... and whatknot... then, who knows!  I KNOW.  What do I know.  Hmm.
   Fifth paragraph.  I can't start being a comedian.  I'M THIRTY FIVE YEARS OLD.  It's time for me to lay down and die.  Well lay down at least.  Not sure about dying.  We'll decide on whether I wanna die After I've Laid Down.  THAT REMINDS ME I can't do SETS.  I'll get TIRED.  I want to LAY DOWN RIGHT NOW and all I've been doing is SITTING DOWN for half an hour.  Anyway.  Doesn't sound like I LOVE IT.  Most people who do stand up do it FOR THE LOVE OF TE GAME.  I'm not getting that from me.  I dunno.  I LIKE it.  Not sure if I'm IN like with it though.  I like that I like it more than many other careers!  YES.  Anyway.  What kinda material can I cobble together.  Let's see.  Anything in the news with Airlines or Airplanes lately?  Hopefully Peanut related?  Probably not.  I don't like it.  I never liked Peanut Comic or Cartoons as a kid but I feel like if I spent some time getting into the Peanutverse as an adult I'd like 'em.  Charlie Brown.  Lucy.  Why not!  They seem to represent good values and everything!  Pretty funny, too!  I'm looking to get into The Peanuts!
   Halfway through the entry.  Let's TURN OFF the Fantasizing About Being Comedian part of my brain now.  It's been on for TWO PARAGRAPHS.  That's long enough!  WE don't need to be on any longer for now!  It'll be activated plenty more for the next two or three months!  LET'S PACE OURSELVES.  My new acoustic guitar started working again.  Whereas for months all the strings were Not Working and acting like Strangy No Notes Strings, NOW they are ALL producing Notes Practically Completely Accurately.  HIGH E STRING not 100%.  That's it.  THAT string sounds kind twangy and not producing Real Note Sounds.  But for some reason All Of A Sudden the guitar is back in action!  What else do I got going on for me.  Let's get into some laughs is what I was thinking but I also want to do it without trying.  Let's do THAT.  Stringer Bell ISN'T THAT SMART.  Each time I watch The Wire I pick up More and More He's Actually NOT AS MUCH ON TE UP AND UP as I thought he was.  This time around it's when he's dumping stocks in Cell Phone Companies in ~2003.  I think I first noticed this trend when he got an A- on his paper in a College Class.  Seemed pretty specific.  Why not give him an A.  Nope.  He got an A-.  Anyway there's like SEVEN OR EIGHT OR NINE things throughout the series that Stringer Bell does that it's like Wait A Second This SOUNDS Smart But Actually THIS IS THE SIGN OF AN IMPERFECT PERSON.
   Anyway.  If it was 2000 and he sold Telephone stock it'd be RIGHT.  If it was 2003 it'd be WRONG.  I was just looking up the numbers!  BUT YOU GET THE IDEA.  MARLOW of The Wire is like JAWS though.  He's a perfect machine!  Anyway.  I probably complained about Stringer not being As Brilliant A Mastermind As He Gets Credit For on the website before.  NOW who isn't perfect.  ME.  Hmm.  You already knew that.  That's good!  MARLOW IS FLAWED TOO.  He cares too much about his Reputation.  Not unlike Taylor Swift.  She named every one of her albums Reputation!  Until someone stepped in and stopped her from doing so from all but one of her albums.  A PRODUCER or a MANAGER.  Hmm.  In my imagination, this entry was going to go better than it has been!  I was thinking it was gonna be a Seven Out Of Ten.  IT'S MERELY A GENEROUS FOUR OUT OF TEN.  I blame YOU AND MYSELF for not holding me to high enough standards. 
    Three paragraphs to go.  Today is Memory Day.  We did it!  Congratulations to all those who lost their lives doing what they believed in.  Both my grandfathers served in World War II.  My Father's Father was in the army and my Mother's Father was in the navy.  I believe they both survived, though, such that they could impregnate my Respective Grandmothers which was good news for me.  When y Dad was little and he asked about what his Dad did in the army, his Mom would say his father was in, "The Children's Army."  Which I Don't Know What That Means.  But the implication was it wasn't that serious.  Less scary.  He was in some offshoot of the army that WASN'T SERIOUS.  It had to do with CHILDREN? or something.  It was some made up thing.  The Children's Army.  And the story I know about my other grandfather was I think they used to call him, "Pops," in the navy.  Cause he was on the older side.  He was in his mid or late 30's in World War II.  I MAY be confusing this with a TV show I saw!  Also I think he was a COOK.  Which is also EVEN MORE LIKELY to be something I saw in a TV show.
    Penultimate paragraph.  Anyway.  Whattado with the rest of the day.  I think I'd enjoy doing some Bikini Kill Lady reading. The chapters are only 2-4 pages long.  Real convenientlike!  I Like the new UCB Space where the Class Show took place.  I'VE GOT A FEELING I'll be doing A LOT of performances there for the rest of my life!... neh.  I wanna do the thing where I go to random places and do comedy.  HANG OUT ALONE AND/OR WIT OTHER COMICS.  SPEND A LOT OF TIME ALONE!  SPEND A LOT OF TIME WITH OTEHR COMICS.  GET THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS.  SPEND A LOT OF TIME ON STAGE.  GET THE BEST OF ALL THREE WORLDS.  It's a Fantastasy at this point but it's also an Interesting and Presumably Possible World Too When You Think About It!  I don't And Can't do pretty much anything else. So why not throw myself into that.  Ya know?  Hmm.  AI isn't gonna take Stand Up Comedians job.  There will be stand up comedy In Places!  I AM CAPABLE in theory!
    Last paragraph!  HMM.  I know I'm not good NOW.  But I'm capable of being capable.  That's my feeling at least.  What else is up.  I can HOLD AN AUDIENCE'S ATTENTION. You know like What's Going On Right Here Every Day?  That's pretty much the baseline I'm working with.  So that's good.  ONE SKILLSET DOWN, SEVENTY THREE TO GO.  Huh.  That's really not that many.  Seventy three.  If I master one skill every two weeks, I'll learn all those skills within, what, three or so years?  EASY.  What else is up.  Anyway.  Gotta talk ABOUT something.  What am I ABOUT when I do comedy.  Hmm.  What's my AUDIENCE about, that's the real question.  Who am I TALKING TO.  I gotta relate to THEM JERKOVVS.  Guess I don't know quite yet!  I might have to learn POP CULTURE.  OH NO.  WHO IS DRAKE.  SOMEONE TELL ME WHO DRAKE IS QUICK.  I know who Drake is.  He's the sworn enemy of Kendrick Lamar.  That's an easy one.  But there's so much I DON'T know.  Hmm.  I'll start working this stuff out tomorrow's entry.  See ya!      

-4:44 P.M.

               
 
   

Thursday, May 9, 2024

That's What I'm Talking About

    Hi!  Last entry of the week.  It's about time!  Wasn't a fan of Getting Up Today.  Seemed like it was gonna be a chore.  WHAT?  TODAY?  HAVING TO EXIST?  THAT DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT!  That was my general sense.  THAT'S HOW SIXTY PERCENT OF PEOPLE FEEL SEVENTY PERCENT OF THE TIME ALL THE TIME.  Abandoned watching The Bear because I got nothing out of it!  When I write a Self Help book one of the tips is Don't Continue Watching Things You Aren't Liking.  Unless it's This Website.  That's the Inception That Proves The Rule.  Went back to Only The Murders In The Building.  I left off halfway into Season II!  It's okay.  Something about it is just OFF.  Could be the murders.  Not sure I feel comfortable with all that violence.  Why can't I be in a universe where I FEEL SAFE for once!  I felt safe in Brady Bunch.  The most violent things that happened were Girl Gets Hit In Face With Football and Family Gets Lightly Cursed By Hawaiian Trinket.  I can tolerate that level violence!
    Looks like Bobby Kennedy II got the Brain Worms.  Worm ate some of his brain!  AND SO THE CAMPAIGN FOR PRESIDENT GOES ON.  I don't wanna be a dick, but it's totally on brand for him, too!  LOOK for 90% of people to come out and say HEY HEADS UP-- WORMS ATE SOME OF MY BRAIN we'd be like WAIT WHAT?  But for RFKJR we're like YEP.  SOMEHOW I FEEL LIKE I ALREADY KNEW THAT.  Doesn't shock me in the least!  I'm being too mean.  He's ONLY CRAZY ABOUT A LOT OF STUFF.  I'm sure he MAKES SENSE 70, 75% of the time he speaks, too.  LET'S BE FAIR.  I'm sure half the time RFKII speaks, you turn to your friend and say YOU CAN HARDLY TELL WORMS ATE HIS BRAIN.  Anyway.  If you eat the worm that ate the brain, does that make you a cannibal?  I don't think so!  Hmm. I'd eat some worms.  What do you call that when you eat worms.  UNHEALTHY.
    Terrible.  Is there ANYTHING I CAN DO to make the next eight paragraphs good.  YES.  Just write something NEWLIKE.  Interestingwise.  Different!  That's hard.  What's going on in my head right now.  Got TV blaring downstairs from What I Don't Like To Call The Family Room.  I call it The Den.  I'd like to call it The Living Room.  If I ever have a family, and I have a room LIKE THAT, I'm gonna call it The Living Room.  Can I make out any words that are being said.  Hmm.  Maybe bits and pieces.  But I don't know what's being said overall.  Good!  Doesn't concern me.  Whom does it concern.  My parents are listening to it.  Maybe it concerns them.  Can THEY make out the words that are being said.  Sure they're not Differently Abled.  THEY CAN MAKE OUT ALL THE WORDS LIKE IT WAS NOTHING.  Got some noise going on outside.  FOR EXAMPLE I'm currently hearing a plane fly by!  This kind of stuff happens ALL THE TIME.  I take for granted that I live relatively close to airports.  Hashtag blessed.
    Fourth paragraph.  Airport is a weird word.  They're Airplaneports.  They're not PORTS for AIR.  Or maybe they are I Didn't Think About It Hard Enough Maybe.  What percent of Airplane Hearings do I consciously wonder If This Is A Nuclear Bomb Attack?  Hmm.  15%.  Which is a lot!  Several times a day!  If I consciously recognize I'm listening to an aeroplane SURE I'll wonder if maybe This Is The End Of Everything.  SO FAR SO GOOD THOUGH.  Seems paranoid BUT on the flip side, if it IS The Nuclear Bomb, I WILL BE ONE OF THE FIRST ONES to be prepared for it.  Just a few more seconds psychically prepared than practically everyone else around!  So it PAYS OFF A LITTLE BIT.  How am I more Psychically Prepared.  ALL I AM IS IN PANIC MODE.  OH NO THIS COULD BE IT, MIGHT BE THE BOMB.  I'M SCARED.  That's All I'm Thinking.  IT'S OF NO HELP TO MYSELF OR ANYONE AROUND ME.  Ah well.  I want to eat lunch but I'm not a fan of the amount of microwaving involved.  Gotta split microwaving IN HALF.  MICROWAVE FIRST.  Then mess with the dish As It Orders You To Do On The Box, mix it up with a fork, MICROWAVE SOME MORE... I don't have TIME FOR ALL THIS MICROWAVING.  I got THINGS TO DO AND PEOPLE TO BE.
   Fifth paragraph!  Listened to Macklemore's song about Palestine Protesters.  Pretty good stuff.  HOW DARE HE suggest he won't for Biden.  Besides that it's pretty great, though!  EVERYONE MUST VUTE FOR BIDEN THOUGH.  I'M WATCHING EVERYONE and you must vote for Biden 24/7 up until Election Day!  THEN VOTE YOUR CONSCIENCE.  Anyway.  I only listened to the song ONCE.  I didn't absorb most of the lyrics necessarily.  But in general it's probably mostly a great song.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses as I absorb the lyrics more and more.  How do I feel about Palestine?  Gotta listen to the lyrics I guess.  Been holding out on forming a COMPLETE opinion until Macklemore released a song and NOW IT'S HERE.  So I'll tell you LATER how I feel about it AFTER I'VE TAKEN IN MACKLEMORE of course!  Not just the lyrics.  THE MUSIC.  I forget how it sounds but THE MUSIC TOO will tell us how to feel about the conflict!  I guess.  My feeling is let's give Macklemore all the credit in the world and say this song will stand the test of time and encapsulate this entire struggle historically.  YES.  Is Macklemore white.  Hmm.  I think he is.  I don't know why it matters.  But I think it does!  Hmm.  HE IS WHITE.  NOT A FAN.
    Halfway through the entry!  WHITE PRIVILEGE.  YEAH.  In what sense.  NOT SURE.  I am ANTI-WAR.  Anti what Israel is doing for the most part!  As far as I can tell!  But I am sympathetic to the pro Palestinian Protesters!  They're on the right side of things.  WHAT IF THEY'RE ANTI-SEMITIC.  Hmm.  LET ME THINK ABOUT THAT.  Hmm.  Now that I think about that I'M PROBABLY AGAINST ANTI-SEMITISM.  So that's good.  I'm talking about this IN CASE IT COMES UP IN BROTHER'S DOCUMENTARY.  You can't present an INTERESTING FRONT to CAMERA without being in tune with WHAT'S GOING ON IN THE WORLD.  Might not come up explicitly but WE GOTTA BE ON TE SAME PAGE WITH THE UNIVERSE and whatknot.  Hmm.  Whatever.  I dunno.  Let's see.  Might be able to work on music better in the coming weeks.  I'm starting to IMAGINE IN MY HEAD music a little bit more clearly than I was imagining it previously.  A little bit more creatively.  I CAN SORT OF PUT SOME PIECES TOGETEHR such that I can write some Songs Possibly!  I DUNNO WE'LL SEE I SUPPOSE.  Maybe write a BETTER protest song.  It's LIKE supporting Palestine/Pro-Palestinian Protesters but it also says ALSO VOTE FOR BIDEN ANYWAY WHY NOT COULDN'T HURT!
   Seventh paragraph.  Steve Albini died?!  I heard him in podcasts!  Hmm.  He produced songs and/or albums I liked!  So there ya go.  He was only sixty one.  Pssh.  I can live longer than that!  Probably.  My most conscious healthstyle choice these days is weather or not to put salt on tater tots.  YES I realize every single movement I make is in a sense some sort of Health Decision.  BUT the only thing that really registers as one is when I make a steak and tater tots and I think I'D LIKE TO PUT EXTRA SALT ON THEM TATER TOTS.  THAT'D BE BAD FOR HEALTH.  HOW BAD FOR HEALTH WOULD ONE SINGLE TIME OF SALTING BE?  I DUNNO.  Either way I salt the tater tots maybe 25% of the time.  I PEPPER them another 25% of the time.  Leave em be 50% of the time.  What would lightly-moderately salting tater tots for one meal be the equivalent of.  HOW FAR DOWN THE PATH of bad health would that take me!  I DON'T KNOW.
   Three paragraphs to go!  Hmm.  Is it a good thing if I get lots of Bad Outside Actor attempts to log into my twitter account.  AT FIRST I figured it was just luck.  By randomness!  MAYBE I'M BEING TARGETTED THOUGH.  For my good looks probably!  Hmm.  Starting to regret my haircut.  I think I look like just another jerk now.  Whereas when I had moderately lengthier hair I looked like a more uniquelike jerk.  I could be wrong.  I'm wrong about 80% of things!  I'd be more prone to being right to Guess I'm Wrong About Any Given Thing.  Hmm.  Maybe I shuold see the new Planet Of The Apes.  I've seen a few of those in the past.  I didn't hate them!  Are we rooting for The Apes in these movies?  I think in some of them.  Off the top of my head The Apes are generally more or less Like People.  Root for the Apes as much as you would Anyone Else!  Some of them are good, some of them are bad!  Some of them aren't good or bad!  NOT INTELLIGENT ENOUGH YET. 
   Penultimate paragraph.  I think I wanna see some Anthropomorphic Apes now that I think about it.  Maybe I do go see that movie!  Seems reasonable.  ANYWAY gotta write two more paragraphs.  Today's entry has been mostly completely pointless.  Seems reasonable!  Over the weekend I moved my 8 Track Recorder from Desk Facing North to On Top Of My Guitar Amp On Floor Facing South.  It makes a lot less sense to not have it on a desk.  And put it on the floor. BUT IT FEELS A LOT MORE NATURAL facing this direction and sitting in the floor to Make Music.  THAT'S JUST HOW MY BODY OPERATES for some reason.  Gotta go with what feels right.  IN THE PAST I made music this way because my room had been way too polluted.  Desk was dirty with books and papers and God knows what else.  So I had 8 Track on floor in Olden Times. And I guess I made music On The Floor!  That rings a bell.  NOW ROOM IS CLEAN.  BUT I AM STILL ATUNED TO THE OLD WAYS.  So that's how that goes. 
    Last paragraph!  Ugh.  I'm probably not gonna see Planet Of The Apes.  I doubt it!  Hmm.  What else is going on.  WOW.  I just thought of something that happened in my Improvement Class this Monday and was like Hah that was funny.  Props!  THE GUY WAS FUNNY!  And the one line STAYED WITH ME!  Go figure!  Anyway.  I put the UCB Improv manual book in a drawer this weekend.  THAT CHAPTER OF MY LIFE IS CLOSED.  Except for how I got two more classes and then a show.  And I will very likely take another class.  Maybe not an Improvement Class.  But I'm Pot Committed to UCB Classes In GENERAL.  I had a good experience with the Pilot Writing Class.  Great!  What else is great.  I shuold take a week off from writing entires next week.  I probably won't.  WHAT CAN I DO FOR MYSELF to encourage myself to take the week off.  I DON'T KNOW.  Hmm.  THINK ABOUT IT. Gotta be SOMETHING.  Lemme think about it.  Anyway.  I'll see ya later!

-4:36 P.M.       
  
               
  
  
 

Wednesday, May 8, 2024

Is That Something People Do

    Hey, friends!  Time to write Some Sense.  I'm not gonna smoke any marijuana with today's entry on account of it backfiring yesterday!   Yesterday Sucked Some Shit!  NOT TODAY.  Today will be a step above Sucking Shit.  Maybe just GRAZE Shit With Tongue.  Make oral contact with Shit.  Get several licks of shit in!  But no deep and prolonged sucking!  Wonderful.  Started watching The Bear.  I don't love it!  It's a REAL SHOW.  It's about REAL PEOPLE.  SO WHAT.  IF YOU'VE SEEN ONE YOU'VE SEEN EM ALL.  And I've seen roughly three or four real people in my life.  I dunno.  I've seen ONE.  I'm totally convinced of my own personhood.  I'm very high on the possibility my Dad is a Real One, too.  My Mom and Brother are obviously Almost Definitely Real, too.  EVERYONE ELSE?  I'm sure Everyone Else IS real but they operate more or less like simulations to me!  Not because I BELIEVE that.  That's just how it kind of works out in my Dumb Mind.  Sometimes!  Not Really Always!  Anyway The Bear is ABOUT REAL people is the impression that I get.  WHY do Chefs always call each other Chef AFTER EVERY SINGLE THING THEY SAY.  Right behind you Chef.  Thanks chef.  Here's that plate, chef.  WE GET IT.  YOU LOVE BEING CHEFS and you know if you Chef your friend he'll Chef you right back giving you all sorts of jolts.  GREAT.
   Some sort of leak over my staircase.  From above!  From the ceiling above!  Over one step in particular.  I wanna say the SEVENTH Step.  Which I believe is Go Around And Tell Your Friends You're Proud Of Them.  Lemme LTURQ.  Seventh AA Step.  "Humbly ask Him to remove our shortcomings."  That's a BIG ask.  How can you HUMBLY ask such a huge favor?  Remove our shortcomings?  I GOT A LOT OF THOSE.  Also more like Humbly ask HER this is 2024.  GOD COULD BE A WOMAN IN THIS CENTURY WE DON'T KNOW.  God is dead.  Long live God.  Anyway.  I dunno what this leak is.  We're inviting some business people to the house to check it out.  Plumbers?  Handy Men?  I dunno what you wanna call them.  Interested parties!  I finished watching HACKS.  We'll we're in the middle of Season Three AS A COUNTRY right now.  But I'm all caught up to date is the point.  I SAW THE LEADING LADY NAKED.  Only in America!  Probably on most of Earth.  GOOD.  SHOULD I get naked for My Brother's Documentary.  IF IT'S TASTEFUL.  SURE.
   I haven't looked specifically at my pubic hair in a while but I don't THINK it's in the best of shape.  Well there ya go.  Keep my pants on then.  Okay!  What's the thing that happens in The Bear that's so good.  If you have to ask then obviously you don't know.  I feel like that phrase comes up naturally every now and then.  Amusing.  I don't like the phrasing of Remove Our Shortcomings.  One of my shortcomings is I'm Short.  What does REMOVING I'm Short mean.  Just take away my physical body?  You want me to be a brain in a jar?  WHAT KIND OF GOD IS THIS?  WHAT KINDA CULT ARE YOU RUNNING?  WHO'S IN CHARGE HERE.  Anyway.  If I could pick ideal height, WHAT WOULD IT BE.  Hmm.  I dunno if I'd wanna be The Standard Exactly Right Advantageously Tallness after being short so long.  Maybe just 5'11 would do!  I'd feel like a traitor crossing into the 6 feets.  Hmm.  Maybe I'd even be happy just being 5'7.  I'm used to being short.  Just be Tall Short.  TALL FOR A SHORT MAN.  5'7.  EASY.  Let's see.  Which of these scenarios should I prepare myself for.  Magically being 5'11 or magically being 5'7.  HMM.
    Fourth paragraph.  How is one of the steps for Alcoholics Anonymous go around and tell people you're sorry for what you did to them while you were drinking, because that is essentially telling people you're in alcoholics anonymous.  SEEMS UN-ANONYMOUS.  Ah well.  Live and learn.  As long as you're not Anonymous to yourself.  Step one as ADMIT you have a problem.  Gotta be Explicitly An Alcoholic TO YER OWN DAMN SELF.  Hmm.  Step one says, "Admit we are powerless over alcohol."  NEVER.  I have SOME power over alcohol and it has SOME power over me!  IT'S A TWO WAY STREET.  When I was younger my parents thought I had an alcohol problem.  Maybe I did at some points.  I forget.  But then if it stopped becoming a problem was it ever a problem in the first place.  Interesting philosophy question.  IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM THAT GOES AWAY, WAS IT A PROBLEM IN THE FIRST PLACE.  Hmm.  My feeling is Yes.  But I'm not a certified philosopher.  Good.  I come from the school of hard knocks.  Does that mean I was physically abused growing up?  It might!
    Fifth paragraph!  Alright!  This entry isn't exactly GOOD persay but it is wiping away the bad stain of Yesterday.  That's what Ringo Starr said when he was pitching Octopus's Garden.  He thought Paul McCartney's Yesterday was getting bad reviews.  He wanted The Beatles to rebound from it.  That's how that goes.  What else is going on and crap.  Maybe try to work on some music tonight.  Not a lot.  Even if I just work at the 8 Track for 10, 15 minutes, that's still something!  Record three 2 minute overlapping tracks of guitar!  That's SOMETHIN.  UGH.  Hitting a wall right now.  If I was an OCTOPUS I could break through the wall.  Maybe Octopus tentacles are Strong.  They seem squishy but they probably are legit strengthy as well!  Anyway.  Another thing I can do Moving Forward In Life is write a The New Monkees Pilot Version 2.0.  I don't know HOW OR WHY.  But it's A POSSIBILITY worth considering.  What would the plot be.  THE NEW MONKEES SHOW UP AND FUCK UP YOUR SHIT.  Oh okay that sounds good.  Very good. 
    Halfway through the entry!  Didn't have any beer with this entry so far.  I guess I can have one now!  Great!  The show is called Hacks because it's people using scythes a lot! METAPHORICALLY of course.  In what scenario is an octopus using ALL EIGHT tentacles at once.  HOW, WHA, WHAT THE HELL.  Really!  C'mon!   How often can that come up!  Seems like a scam to me.  Most of these tentacles are for show.  Octopus seem like a friendly ally to the human.  If I were in the sea I'd feel comfortable with the octopus!  THAT'S IT.  I see a lot of myself In An Octopus!  Friendly!  Intelligent!  Mostly unnecessary!  Anyway.  I dunno.  Who are Octopus's main rivals.  Hmm.  Coral Reefs?  Sharks?  Plastic six pack can wrappers?  Nevermind about being friends with Octopus, I just realized I Want To Eat An Octopus.  I've had Calamari which is Squid.  NOT CLOSE ENOUGH.  I gotta eat Exactly Octopus!  I WILL NOT REST.  Until I've eaten Everything!  You know.  To assert my dominance or something.  Something like that.  Seems like something to aim for!            
    Seventh paragraph.  Well let's start at Just Food.  Then once I've Eaten All Just Foods I can work my way to Eating Inedible Objects to assert my dominance over THOSE THINGS.  Okay!  Four more paragraphs to go.  Got a song I think would fit pretty well in Brother Documentry!  Even though no footage has been shot yet!  And nobody has any idea what it is!  I think one of these songs I came across in a playlist today is Real Appropriate.  THE DOORS -- People Are Strange.  Not really perfect soundwise to play against Interviews of Me and Brother.  But it's as appropriate themewise as any other song I think!  NOT GONNA HAPPEN though.  Just another reject.  But you can listen to it at your leisure.  Consider it part of the soundtrack for the website!  GREAT.  Anyway.  Repair person is coming soon to check out Leak.  That's what they're called!  Repair Person.  Interesting.  Very interesting.
   A MERE three more paragraphs to go!  Maybe I try marijuana again with tomorrow's entry!  It'll probably backfire on me!  Then maybe I shouldn't!  GOOD.  Really should start taking time off from the website after finishing up this week tomorrow.  IT'S SO HARD TO LET GO THOUGH.  It's some sort of addiction.  Step one is admit I have a problem.  I'M STARTING FROM THE SECOND STORY.  WHAT'S STEP TWELVE.  Huh.  The 12th step is you have to PREACH TO OTHER ALCOHOLICS the 12 step program.  GOOD.  I ALREADY STARTED DOING TAHT.  I'm way ahead of the game.  I'm coming down these stairs like it was nobody's business!  BUT IT IS.  IT'S EVERYBODY'S BUSINESS.  That's part of the premise!  Anyway.  Might get pizza tonight.  Might get EGGPLANT on my pizza tonight.  That's something that might just happen!  Not guaranteed by any means.  Whatever.  That's not some sort of emoji sex reference.  IT'S AN ASPIRATIONAL PIZZA REFERENCE.  That's all! 
    Penultimate paragraph. There's several Nautical themed Beatles songs.  Not exactly sure why we need any of them!  But I guess we're better off with them than without them.  Only the two.  Octopus Garden and Yellow Submarine.  I was imagining one or three more.  Ah well.  If only what I Dared To Dream Twere Real!  Is there a song about drowning in the Beatles oeuvre.  Maybe that's what I'm thinking of.  DOES Rocky Raccoon drown in the ocean at some point.  Hmm.  I may be thinking of Under The Sea from The Little Mermaid.  I have never seen The Little Mermaid.  Just not my jam!  Started watching Wish a few nights ago.  Lost interest about 30 minutes into it.  I WISHED it was more better I guess!  Maybe I'll put it back on at some point.  It wasn't ALL THAT BAD.  Wait a second, was the plot basically the same as Inception?  I was slightly high AND I have never seen Inception so take those two things into account.
   Last paragraph.  Anyway.  Another entry in the books.  For people to read.  Dumb people.  I don't know what kind of dumb people.  We can assume You're Dumb SOMEHOW.  Not sure about the specifics.  But YOU DO EXIST.  Probably are Real People, too.  And if you are simulations, you're probably still As Real As I Am At Least.  That's ain't bad.  I'm pretty real.  I've been pretty Personal at times in my life.  DONE some SHIT.  FELT some shit.  It's been fun!  Maybe it'll continue AND/OR even progress.  I LIKE THOSE ODDS.  Seems pretty high to me!  Great.  HMM overheard the repairman who arrived 5 minutes ago.  Sounds like it might be THE BOILER which is leaking.  Interesting.  That exists in Reality.  Which is good.  Might have to order a few parts.  Parts exist in reality.  Anyway that's it for now I guess.  I'll see ya tomorrow!

-5:20 P.M. 

Tuesday, May 7, 2024

I'll See You Tomorrow

    Hey, friends!  Ten Paragraph Time!  Should be pretty good on account of I Dunno Just Feels Like I Might Have It In Me Today.  I don't feel like writing Same Ol' Crap.  Thus I'll probably write Relatively New Ol' Crap!  Did I DO anything today that was unique?  LIVE YOUR UNIQUELIFE that's what I say.  I did not do anything unique.  I was reading live-to-text court testimony about extra marital affair of President's Sex Life!  Seems like the lady WAS NOT INTO IT.  JUST ANOTHER TUESDAY.  I don't think Stormy Daniels is this woman's given name.  I SAY STORMY IS A STAGE NAME.  She wanted to get into meteorology and whatknot.  Also I bet she's just a big Jeff Daniels fan.  I'd be a Jeff Daniels fan if I ever gave it any thought!  I gave it thought.  I'm a fan.  JEFF can be pronounced HEFF if we're talking LatinAmericanStyle and Stormy MAY OR MAY NOT have been friends with Hugh HEFFner.  WOW.  THIS RIFFING... IT'S ALMOST TOO GOOD.  SOMEONE GET GUINNESS BOOK OF WORLD RIFFING ON THE PHONE. 
    There's a Simpsons episode where Bart asks Hugh Hefner if he can call him Hef and Hugh Hefner says NO and I thought it was just a joke that Hugh Hefner was being SHORT with Bart but now I realize it's because WAIT NO IN NO SCENARIO IS HUGH HEFNER NAMED HEFF.  His first name is HUGH.  HEFF is just a SYLLABLE of his second name!  I wasn't putting ALL THE PIECES TOGETHER while watching the Simpsons Episode.  Ah well.  ALRIGHT FUCK IT I'm gonna smoke a little bit of weed.  I PUT YOU THROUGH ENOUGH CRAP.  Time to put you through A Different Kind Of Crap for the rest of the entry.  Let's go.  OKAY.  HERE I AM.  I just read the sentences I have just written! I'M SORRY.  That was The Ol' Me!  Either way I am capable of so much more!  8.5 paragraphs more in relation to the 1.5 that just came.  What More is that.  Let me consult Calculator.  I am capable of writing 5.67x more than what I just wrote Today.  Well now the paragraphs are clean.  NOW I am capable of writing Four More of what I just wrote now!
    Yes.  Let's see.  What could I be writing if it weren't for The Ten Paragraph Extravaganza.  I could be working on so much better stuff.  Maybe not music.  Maybe I don't have the physicality for music.  But I could probably write something more productive than this blog!  Who am I talking to.  ME.  I'm bragging to myself that I could write something else.  Hmm.  I GOT A MESSAGE FOR MYSELF -- COOL DEAL.  What other messages might I have for myself.  I dunno.  Keep a-typin'!  Words ain't gonna manifest themselves!  Well one day they might.  And on that day I'm out of a job!  I dunno.  Let's see.  This is not going as well as I hoped it would!  But bit by bit I am typing out words.  So in the end Mission Accomplished I guess!  What else is going on in my neck of the neighborhood.  I live at THE CORNER of the neighborhood.  Top Left as far as I'm concerned.  It all depends on your perspective!  But that's mine!
    Sure!  What else is my perspective.  Still sticking with Type Words By All Means Necessary.  Wait a second.  NOPE.  I'm ditching that perspective!  IT'S GONE.  Do I need a perspective At All Times?  I'm gonna go Perspectiveless for a second.  I don't like this either.  What's a good perspective.  Perspectovitus.  Is it a disease of the mouth?  Is it a Harry Potter Wizarding Spell?  We don't know.  Well, anyway.  Started listening into the Drake and Kendrick Lamar rap, "Beef."  I'm reading this beef all wrong cause I think you're a feeb that's one line I think one of them can use if they want.  Anyway I'm enjoying it so far!  I don't have a dog in this fight because it's not my place to pick sides.  Maybe I should listen to both of the artists' Back Catalogue.  That's a novel idea. Kendrick Lamar is the short one, right?  He's got my vote based on that!  HEY he's 5'5.  That's relatably short!  If you're 5'7 and labeled as short I AIN'T RELATIN'.  I'll relate to a 5'5 Short Person though.  GOOD.
    Fifth paragraph!  I don't believe it!  What was I talking about.  When was the last time I Was Talking About Something.  Probably several seasons ago.  Or several minutes ago I dunno.  Now's a good time to introduce a new topic.  Hmm.  Topics.  Okay.  Last few Improv Classes I've had the word GEOMETRY ready to go for when asked a suggestion for ideas for Monologues.  HMM.  If I were to give a monologue based on Geometry, what would I say.  What does Geometry make me think of.  I DON'T KNOW ANY STORIES.  MY LIFE IS EPHEMERAL.  I HAVE NO IDEA.  Geometry makes me think of my Dad because My Dad was a math teacher and he used to come home at 11 PM on school nights and help me with my math homework in high school.  AND THAT'S why I feel shame for letting my father down in life.  To be fair, I'm not just letting down my Dad.  I'm letting down EVERYONE.  THE WHOLE TOWN.  And that's what geometry makes me think of.
     Halfway through the entry!  Hmm.  What if I started NOT Letting Down Everyone.  I guess I can give it a shot.  That's not what Geometry made me think of.  I was thinking of that this whole time.  The marijuana might be starting to wear off.  That's bound to happen eventually!  Gonna keep writing a bit without re-upping with smoking more.  Might as well see how much I can get out of this.  Let's see.  Not a fan of today's entry.  Could be a lot better.  That's what tomorrow is for.  Tomorrow COULD BE GREAT.  But why would tomorrow be good if Today Sucks.  All the Kinks would be worked out!  What I Don't Know Today I'll KNOW IN SPADES by tomorrow!   I'll FIGURE SOMETHING OUT.  That probably won't happen but Whatever We'll See.  HMM.  I THINK I JUST FIGURED OUT TOMORROW'S SPADES.  Just in this moment.  GOT IT.  Also as part of the deal I'm Giving Letting No One Down A Shot.  GONNA MAKE MY DAD AND THE TOWN PROUD.  In what sense.  I'm gonna BE A GOOD GUY IN THE BROTHER DOCUMENTARY off the top of my head.
    Sure!  SURE.  All that makes a ton of sense.  Only four more paragraphs left to write.  What an achievable task!  Watch some more HACKS tonight.  It's a pleasant enough show!  I always get a kick out of it when there's shows with Comedy Writing within the plot of show that sucks that's supposed to pass for good!  Cause I'm always like I can write better than that!  So I can briefly pretend That Means I Can Actually Write TV Level Comedy!  That's not what it means!  TOO BAD I DRAW THAT CONCLUSION NONETHELESS.  What is TV Level Comedy.  I dunno.  Sounds bad though.  Probably achievable but not something you'd necessarily wanna aim for.  I wouldn't wanna deal with TV Level Comedy unless it was absolutely necessary.  Alright.  Maybe I got that completely backwards.  I don't care.  Pretty cool year we got going on DIGITWISE.  /24!  IT'S GREAT.  SOLID EIGHT MONTHS LEFT.  GET YER 24 TIME IN.  Not too late to appreciate!  What else is good.  25 might be fun as well.  Nah.  Could be.  I don't know.
   Eighth paragraph!  I still got most of the beer I started earlier!  I think I'll finish that!  Good deal!  Anyway.  Wish I knew what I was talking about.  Just smoked some more marijuana.  So now I'm High Again!  That seems like a title of a song from a couple of years ago that was on the ALT ROCK new song playlist.  And if it wasn't the title IT DAMN WELL COULD HAVE BEEN.  Anyway.  Maybe I can work on some music tonight!  I said I was living in the key of A AND A Flat yesterday BUT that was based on me assuming my guitar was in standard tuning.  I MAY BE IN SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT KEYS.  Could be A FLAT AND G.  Wouldn't that be something.  Ah.  I guess.  Maybe I'm gonna go check right now.  Could be the move to make of the moment.  OKAY UPDATE.  It was A and A Flat ALL ALONG.  Standard Tuning Folks.  Good deal!  What the Hell.  Why am I saying A Flat.  I forget.  It may be called G SHARP.  I USED TO KNOW THIS.  MY MEMORY BETRAYS ME.
    Penultimate paragraph.  Now I think it's G#.  Let's go with that.  YEAH Ab looks weird.  OKAY.  I'm not happy with how I'm Suddenly DUMBER Than I Just Was but WHO AM I TO COMPLAIN.  Whatever!  What else do I got going on for two whole paragraphs.  Words.  That says it all, man.  Not happy about that.  I was hoping More Than Words would be said.  You mean like AI IMAGES.   I haven't done A SINGLE AI thing.  I'M HOLDING OUT.  NOT ME MAN.  Huh.  Maybe I'm being LEFT BEHIND in society by not EXPERIMENTING WITH AI.  Everyone's going on about oh my AI made me the prettiest pictures today.  my AI told me the funniest joke.  And whose getting left in the dust?  MICHAEL.  I forget what's going on!  OH RIGHT.  I'm almost up to Being Done With The Entry.  OH NO.  I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S GOING ON ANYMORE.  I forgot AGAIN.  I just realized people may read what I write in a way I DON'T APPROVE. And NOW I just realize 99% people read it in a way I don't sign off on.  WOW.
    Last paragraph.  Almost done.  Most of you are right though.  Now that I think about it yeah that 2/3rds of you are right on target.  Hmm.  Then again I DON'T KNOW!  Let's see.  This really did not go as I had hoped.  BUT A PARAGRAPH IS A PARAGRAPH and I wrote a decahedron of them.  Maybe I should try some AI tonight.  WHY SHUOLD I DO THAT.  I DON'T LIKE IMAGES. I'm more of a sound guy to be honest!  Maybe I should try some audio AI.  Not tonight!  Sounds good!  Don't Do That?  I can do that! Hey!  AI Steak Sauce.  There ya go.  THE, "I," RESEMBLES A, "ONE," DIGIT.  Interesting.  The universe is FINALLY starting to show something interesting!  THIS AI STEAK SAUCE BIT IS RESTORING MY FASCINATION WITH THE GALAXY.  Makes sense.  So what else is going on.  Nothin'!  I'll see ya tomorrow!  I THINK IT'S A FLAT.  Just to set the record straight!

-6:06 P.M.    
           
     
     
       

Monday, May 6, 2024

Don't Remind Me

    What's up!  I wanted to take some time off from the website to work on MUSIC until I realized I AM IN NO CONDITION TO WORK ON MUSIC.  Mentally or physically.  You gotta have a Young Man's Inquisitive Nature to write new songs AND a Young's Get Up And Go!  I don't have enough of either!  I have a small amount of both, though!  I did make some progress on music this weekend.  Played some Guitar Into Bass Emulator on my 8 Track Recorder.  Did figure some LIFE STUFF OUT THOUGH.  Figured out I was living in BOTH THE KEY OF A and THE KEY OF A FLAT AT ONCE.  So that's good.  That explained a lot of my Confusion!  WELL I WAS living in both those keys at once and once I figured that out CROSSED TAHT OFF MY LIST and Now I progressed into Living Into Some Other Thing Presumably.  Wonder what music I'm living in now!  HMM.  Why do I need to write new songs that I probably can't write when ALL THE WHILE I'm probably LIVING IN A COMPLETE SONG THAT ALREADY EXISTS.  Huh.  WHOSE TO SAY the complete song I'm living in has been written yet.  MAYBE IT'S ONE THAT I'VE YET TO WRITE.  Ah, that's nice.  That makes sense.  Gotta write the songs That I'm Living In.  Sure.
    Went to Improv Class today!  Went as well as any other class goes!  Mediocrely!  What's something I got a laugh for.  Doing what I had to do.  I DID MY JOB and people LAUGHED AT ME.  WHAT IS THIS.  NOW I KNOW HOW TRUMP FEELS.  HE'S JUST TRYING TO DO HIS JOB AND EVERYONE LAUGHS AT HIM FOR IT.  WHY.  DO the other people in the class realize I'm some sort of Idiot in the classical sense.  I think they must.  Gotta be obvious that I'm some sort of Dumb Person.  The only question is do they laugh AT ME behind my back or do they laugh WITH ME behind my back.  My guess is Neither.  They don't ACTIVELY think or talk about me behind my back but they PASSIVELY do.  They THINK about me behind my back WITH EACH OTHER.  No words are stated but it's implied in looks and glances that they agree that I'm Retarded.  Trump MAY not Just Be, "Trying to do his job."  NOT SURE what he's trying to do.  Whatever it is though... GOOD FOR HIM.
    Started watching Hacks.  For some reason I had thought this was about Political Reporters.  It's possible there was a book called Hacks about Political Reporters or something.  EITHER WAY it's a pretty good show!  Not a LAUGH RIOT but it has DRAMA in it as well as humour.  Also CHARACTERS.  Settings.  What else does it have.  THE HEROES' JOURNEY.  Brother is presumably coming over this weekend for Mama's Day and preusmably will be shooting some footage with me for THE DOCUMENTRY.  I think it's about LONELINESS.  That's one key word he gave me at some point about what it might be about.  Hmm.  Loneliness.  What do I got on Loneliness.  I'm not that lonely.  I got lots of voices in my head.  If there's one thing I'm NOT it's lonely.  I do long for Physical Intimacy.  Should I tell The Camera about that?  SEEMS REASONABLE TO GO ON ABOUT TO MY BROTHER ABOUT THAT SUBJECT.  I think we're all lonely these days!  INTERNET.  Social Commentary.  Alright sounds like I'm prepared for the documentary then!  Good deal!
    Hmm.  I guess I should talk about my own experience.  Not just give Social Commentary.  Good deal!  Wilco -- The Lonely One.  Is that relevant to this discussion?  I feel like it might be!  I can play that song on guitar!  Not to brag!  This is good stuff Brother is gonna love this.  Anyway.  I remember listening to that song a lot while in the THROES OF HEARTACHE.  In the midst of my biggest not-so-requited-est Crush I was listening to/playing that song a lot!  Hmm.  Brother might want footage of me playing the song.  WHY NOT.  See, I really don't think my Brother is prepared for these kinds of filmmaking decisions.  WHAT DOES HE KNOW about deciding whether to include THAT or NOT include THAT. IT'S ALL GONNA BE CRAP ANYWAY.  If the end product is Going To Be Crap HOW DO YOU DECIDE THE THRESHOLD OF CRAPPITUDE.  Hmm.  Actually that makes it simple.  Just include it.  It's crap! CRAP IS CRAP.  Unless he takes copyright law seriously.  Huh.
    Fifth paragraph.  Presumably if there's footage of me playing guitar I'LL BE PLAYIN' SOME ORIGS.  Some FRESHS.  Good.  Anyway.  Maybe order some SUBWAY tonight.  I like sandwiches.  Let's see.  Got another therapist appointment tomorrow morning.  Great!  Which one is this one.  This one is DOCTOR Therapist.  One of them is Social Worker Therapist and this one is Straight up Psychiatrist Therapist.  They cover Exact Same Therapy Ground.  But this one is presumably paid more!  Not by me.  Health Insurance covers both!  And I think they get paid the same amount!  But OVERALL I'm guessing Psychiatrist Therapist gets paid more IN GENERAL OVERALL than Social Worker Therapist.  NO DUH.  Anyway I watched Jerry Seinfeld Presents: Unfrosted and I didn't think it was terrible!  It wasn't the greatest thing ever but I MAY HAVE laughed a few times.  I can't say FOR SURE I laughed but I was brought to the verge of laughter plenty of moments!  WHY NOT.  NOT SURE WHY JANUARY SIXTH STUFF HAPPENED but I guess it's time that WE AS A COUNTRY HEALED.  Did we heal?  I dunno.  I FEEL A LITTLE BIT HEALED.
   Why is it called UNFROSTED.  NEVER in the film did they impress upon me the IMPORTANTANCE that they're talking SPECIFICALLY about The Pop Tarts That Aren't Frosted.  HMM.  NOT LIKE THIS MOVIE TO HAVE SOMETHING IN IT THAT DOESN'T QUITE MAKE SENSE.  Anyway.  SURE I'm saying nice things so Jerry Seinfeld will put me in the sequel EGGOS.  SOMEONE'S gotta do it!  Does Jerry Seinfeld have strong feelings on the Mathematics of Sine and Cosine?  Probably cares SLIGHTLY more about the subject than most people.  Not A LOT.  Just A TINY bit more.  I just talked my way out of a role of Side Of Banana: The Movie.  People can have a banana with their breakfast.  Maybe it's not the most obvious breakfast now that I think about it.  But nothing's specifically stopping them.  I gotta be REALLY FUNNY in my Brother's Loneliness DOC.  Dunno who might see this.  THIS COULD BE MY BIG BREAK.  Well I gotta be REALLY SOMETHING at least.  Whatever tone I wanna hit I GOTTA KNOCK IT OUT OF THE PARK.  Settle on SOME adjective to hit at 10 out of 10 at least!  Commit to something!  Doesn't matter what!
    Seventh paragraph.  IS THIS WEBSITE why I don't feel lonely?  Could be!  Hmm.  Kinda lonely AT THE TOP though.  King Of Website.  Hmm.  Anyway.  Kind of a ceremonial position though.  No real power.  I dunno.  Probably leaning towards taking Writing For Late Knight Class after Improvement 201 ends I think.  I THINK Stand Up would be interesting BUT I just think MY LIFE is more attuned towards a Writing Lifestyle than a Performing One!  I'd like to see what I can do with a Stand Up Comedy Work Life BUT I JUST DON'T THINK IT'S IN TEH CARDS.  What's in the cards.  I HAVE SOME CARDS SOMEWHERE.  NOT A FULL DECK.  PROBABLY ROUGHLY 38-42 CARDS.  LEMME TAKE A QUICK LOOK.  Nope put 'em away somewhere.  OH WELL.  WHY SAVE THE CARDS?  FOR FUN.  What if I wanna draw a card randomly.  Pick the Jack of Spades.  What fun!  Figure out what that means and whatknot.  Doesn't matter if it's not from a full deck!  STILL tons of fun.
    Three paragraphs to go.  Hmm.  JUST REALIZED today's entry sucks.  DAMNIT.  Probably better off just not posting it.  Hmm.  Interesting.  What a conunderum.  OH.  RIGHT.  Cause I'm thinking more Seriously And Straight Forwardly For Music.  That's why!  You don't wanna be thinking Creatively and Off The Cuff when doing Music.  That's why today's entry is a piece of shit!  Cause OVER THE WEEKEND I was trying to get IN TUNE WITH MYSELF.  And NOW I AM.  And HERE WE ARE.  SORRY.  Don't worry by tomorrow I'll be a complete mess again.  Pretty sure I'm still as fucked up as I've ever been.  Hmm.  Well, sure.  More so, even!  Just in different ways!  What else is up. What is the allure for actors or comedians to become directors.  WHY did Jerry Seinfeld be like MAN I WISH I WAS THE GUY WHO WAS LIKE ACTION.  CUT.  I WANNA BE THE GUY WHO DIRECTS THE MOVEMENTS AND WHATKNOT.  I'LL TELL YOU Cause he's A MORON THAT'S WHY.  That checks out. 
   Penultimate paragraph.  This weekend I started smoking weed in Middles Of The Day!  Instead of just before bed!  Now I also get some nice Fun Time Chill Out Sessions in the Day Times!  Could be a gamechanger!  Hmm.  I like the part where you ingest it and your body is like Oh Right This Is Good.  Makes sense!  I don't like this entry.  Possibly THE ENTRY THAT WILL RUIN THE WEBSITE.  Might have been building up some MOMENTUM with other entries even though Now That I Think About It I kind of remember not liking Other Recent Entries Now That I Think About It.  Hmm.  I dunno!  Tomorrow might be a GREAT entry.  That'll SHOW EM.  That'll Show ALL OF EM.  I probably will write another great entry or two BEFORE I DIE.  WOW.  I LIKE THOSE ODDS!  Now I feel good again!  Tomorrow is another day!  Anyway.  What else.  Gonna have Subway for dinner.  Watch some more HACKS tonight.  Write a GOOD ENTRY FROM TEH GROUND UP TOMORROW.  One more paragraph tonight.  All in all IT ALL LOOKS FINE.
   Yeah!  My brother is lonely.  I think that's the moral of the story!  Hmm.  What else is up.  I deduced that with my powers of reasoning, not through him confessing to me, so I think it's okay for me to say it on my website.  Anyway.  INTERNET.  AM I RIGHT.  Transitioning from THREADS back to X.  Not a COMPLETE transition.  I'm not gonna be Browsing THE X all day.  But I'll go on X two dozen times a day for news updates, sure!  I JUST GOT BORED WITH THREADS. I DIDN'T LIKE TEH QUALITY OF THE POSTERS.  I DON'T KNOW WHY.  NOT A FAN.  I DON'T like how X is curated by An Asshole but MAYBE I can put that out of my mind!  MAYBE I CAN'T.  We'll see how this situation plays out IN REAL TIME.  I guess only TIME WILL TELL.  Anyway.  I guess that's about it for today.  I'm sorry if you read this entire thing thinking I bet this picks up at some point.  Because it didn't!  BUT it will WITH FUTURE ENTRIES.  So in a sense IT WILL.  So there's THAT.  See ya later.

-6:51 P.M.       
 

Thursday, May 2, 2024

I Forget Why It Matters

    Hey, friends!  Time to wrap up the Crazy Sheet Week!  IF you got something good out of this week, drop me a lie and let me know!  Because my impression was that It Was The Pits.  "DROP ME A, 'LIE?"  Fruedish Slip!  Anyway.  I want to take next week off.  But it's hard to let go sometimes.  We'll see what happens.  Either way sure I had two halves of hamburgers for lunch!  First I had one half.  Then I had another half twenty minutes later.  That's how we do it in my house.  No it isn't.  It's how we did it ONCE!  This time.  Right Now!  Good.  Started watching The Holdovers.  It's a good movie.  Every now and then you watch a movie and go HEY.  GOOD MOVIE.  THAT REMINDS ME... ALL THOSE OTHER MOVIES I'VE BEEN WATCHING? ...NOT GOOD MOVIES.  THAT'S MY MAIN TAKE AWAY FROM THIS GOOD MOVIE.  THAT I DON'T LIKE OTEHR MOVIES.  GOOD TIMES.  What's so good about it.  I can live vicariously through it.  I wish I was a boarding school!  Or something.  I don't know!  You can live vicariously through any movie.  YES BUT WHEN ELSE DO I GET TO VICARIOUSLY MATCH WITS WITH THE LIKES OF A PAUL GIAMATTI.
    Huh.  Gonna shave this weekend, one way or another!  Probably The Main One Way.  With razor.  Seems to be the consensus Among Me's in terms of The Way To Shave!  Weird to be setting my alarm clock for 8 AM and getting up at 12:30 PM.  I have nothing to do in the morning other than hopefully get a couple of walks in!  The earlier I get up the better, presumably, for my health!  AND YES it's okay to leave myself some leeway in terms of getting up in the morning.  BUT FOUR AND A HALF HOURS IS PUSHING IT.  I WANT TO PUSH ME AROUND, WELL I WILL WELL I WILL.  Hmm.  Has ANYONE ever listened to or seen the band Matchbox 20 and thought Now There's a COOL Band.  They have LISTENABLE songs.  TOP FOURTY Modern Rock songs.  From 25 years ago, at least.  But no one is like HOLY SHIT NOW TEHRE'S A CULTURALLY COOL AND HIP HARDCORE ROCK N ROLL BAND.  Maybe some people do.  Maybe Matchbox 20 Gaslit American Culture somehow WHAT WITH their PUSHINGS and their THREE A.M.ers'S and their REAL WORLDS'S.  Seemed like straightforward dumb songs but THEY HAD HIDDEN COOL Rock N Roll INDOCTRINATION MESSAGES.  Hmm.  Score one for The Match Box Twenties then!
     I'm upset about watching The Holdovers. It's a pleasant film to watch but I know it will be over after another hour and a half of watching it!  Then there might NEVER BE ANOTHER good pleasant film to watch EVER AGAIN.  THIS MAY BE IT FOLKS.  Anyway.  I never went to boarding school.  I imagine it's a lot like This Current Movie I'm Watching for now.  "Boarding School?  More Like Boring School!" that might be my ice breaker on the first day of class if I were drafted into boarding school.  Anyawy.  DID Matchbox 20 GO OUT OF THEIR WAY to Be Uncool?  Was it a CONSCIOUS DECISION on the part of the band or the label to LEAN INTO a Lame Image?  Cause IT WORKED.  Their HITS just HIT DIFFERENT because of us Knowing We're Not To Like The Band Publically.  OR EVEN PRIVATELY. Being Cool isn't the same as, Having Permission To Like Them.  The point is I DIDN'T LIKE THEM PUBLICLY, THEY'RE NOT COOL, AND I LIKED THEIR HITS.  I think ALL REASONABLE PEOPLE CAN AGREE ON MATCHBOX 20.  Not really.  Maybe only people who were nine years old when their hits came out like them.  Gotta have a pre-developed brain for that sort of thing maybe!  YES.
    Fourth paragraph.  MATXHBOX TWENTY RULED THE DAY for a time.  That's what people were listening to for a while.  DON'T TAKE MY WORD FOR IT.  Either Know It Yourself or Don't Care About It!  THAT'S HOW THAT GOES.  Huh.  May Second?  May Second makes me think of 5/2 which makes me think of The B 52's which makes me think of Love Shack.  And that's my Monologue for THAT suggestion.  That's a terrible monologue.  I should tell A STORY about Love Shack.  Hmm.  I've listened to the song EIGHT TIMES in the last several weeks.  It came up on a playlist once, I enjoyed it This Time Around and told myself, MICHAEL, YOU LISTEN TO TAHT SONG SOME MORE UNTIL YUO STOP LIKING IT, and THAT'S WHAT I'VE BEEN DOING.  And that's what May Second makes me think of.  B-52's.  Wonder waht that's a reference to.  Sounds like a BAND from the 70's and 80's!  NO BUT WHAT DID THEY NAME TEMSELVES THAT FOR.  AND DON'T SAY SUPER BATTLESHIP.
   Hmm.  Wikipedia SAYS it comes from the name of a HAIRDO which was named after AN AIRCRAFT.  Wonderful.  I think I knew the Aircraft part in the past. Then I forgot it!  I used to know LOTS of things in the past that I forgot.  MOST OF IT I will reremember at some point.  Lots of which WILL NEVER OCCUR TO ME AGAIN.  You'd think The Female in the scenario would be upset about The Love Shack.  MEN ARE HAPPY ABOUT GETTIN SOME LOVIN' ANYWHERE AM I RIGHT.  But women are particular.  They want ROMANCE.  Makin' sex in BEDROOMS and whatknot.  Men happy to get it on in shacks out back sure.  Either way I'm happy that it appears to be working out for everyone involved in the song!  SO that's good.  Maybe it's a lot of women's secret sex wish to make love in The Shack Out Back.  Hmm.  Lots of discourse on social media about IF A WOMAN was alone in the woods, WHO would she feel more safe with-- if she was confronted with A MAN or with a BEAR.  And lots of women say BEAR.  Hmm.  GUESS WHAT THEN.  I'M JUST GONNA DRESS UP AS A BEAR.  DIDN'T COUNT ON THAT ONE.  MAN DRESSED UP AS A BEAR TO TRICK YOU.  NOW WHO LOOKS STUPID.
    Halfway through the entry!  If I could choose between meeting A Man, A Woman, or A Bear in the woods... I guess I'd pick a man!  I like women and would obviously be happy to just work together with her appropriately but BASED ON THIS SOCIAL MEDIA DISCUSSION seems like the woman wouldn't be very comfortable in this scenario WITH ME!  Also now that I think about it also Based On Every Single Interaction I've Had With Woman In My Life.  So let's cross that off the list IN CONSIDERATION OF HER.  Anyway.  Hmm.  WOULD I prefer a bear over man?  Nah.  I don't think a man is gonna take advantage of me or anything!  WHEREAS A BEAR JUST MIGHT.  Anyway.  What if the bear wants out of the woods too!  Then we're really in for some cooperation and working together!  Hmm.  If the show SURVIVOR didn't have cameras would it just be RapeVille USA?  Hmm.  I don't think so! I don't know what goes on behind closed doors though.  Behind Closed Doors Of Forests.  Cuold be lots of raping.  Oh no.  THAT AIN'T GOOD.  Can we train Bears to actively PROTECT WOMEN from Woods Threateners?  I'd like to see some research done on the subject!
    Ugh.  Seventh paragraph.  Anyway.  I'd like to THINK that if a woman sees me in Woods she'd think ah he's one of the good ones.  HE'S, "Better Than Bear," Material!  But she wouldn't!  NOTHING IN MY APPEARANCE instantly makes a random person instantly 100% more comfortable with me I don't think.  I DON'T THINK.  Right?  Maybe!  I DON'T KNOW.  I REALLY DON'T.  If the average man is less safe than a bear... DO I appear safer than the average man?  PROBABLY NOT!  Why would I assume I would!  Huh.  DO WOMEN TRUST ME IN THE WOODS.  In the end I do have higher priorities on my Life Of Life.  Like what.  Seeing to it that women find me trustworthy in MALL PARKING LOTS and stuff.   Huh.  It'd be NICE if women found me trustworthy but I can't do much about it either way!  Guess I can groom myself properly and whatknot.  Buy nice clothes.  Talk in an erudite manner.  BUT I DON'T WANNA PUT ON AN ACT just for women to Trust Me Over Bears.  That defeats the whole purpose!  IT NEEDS TO BE REAL.  COME FROM A TRUE PLACE.  If women wanna trust me over bears or not IT MUST COME NATURALLY.  So that's something to keep in mind?  Anyway.  Bears are scary.  They can run FIVE THOUSAND MILES PER HOUR with the force of over TEN MILLION HORSES.
    Three paragraphs to go.  Anyway.  What to do for dinner tonight.  One thought is Get Pizza!  Another thought is Do Some Other Crap!  Does a bear shit in the woods.  If a bear shits in the woods and only you are around to hear it does it make a sound.  Yes. YOU are around to hear it.  Also the bear heard it, too.  LOTS OF PEOPLE HEARD IT.  Huh.  What IS the sound of shitting.  Well for humans the Plop in the water in the toilet is the most commonly associated sound.  But that's not the sound bears make.  Bears might make some big shits though.  Might make some noise just through the process of Pushing or Dropping on the ground.  WHEN IT COMES TO CRAP Bears probably know what they're doing.  Of all the species in all the world, BEARS JUST SEEM LIKE THEY GOT SHITTING DOWN TO A SCIENCE.  I've probably been brainwashed by those commercials where bears use toilet paper.  That's where that comes from.  Huh.
   Penultimate paragraph.  We should take This Social Media Exercise as a RALLYING CALL to improve HUMAN RELATIONS such that we reach a point where we can work together in the woods in the future, right?  Let's AIM FOR A TIME in the future where we HOPE women will feel comfortable meeting men in the woods alone.  Let's say TEN YEARS.  It's a MOONSHOT.  BY 2034, WE AS A SOCIETY aim to REACH A POINT where women will feel comfortable meeting men in the woods such that they can work together to get out of the woods without fear or pause or hesitation.  YES.  What's STEP ONE.  Step one is admitting we have a problem.  OK WE GOT A PROBLEM.  What's step two.  Step two is admitting it's mostly YOUR FAULT.  Hmm.  That's not a good step two.  I CAME UP WITH STEP ONE.  YOUR TURN TO COME UP WITH STEP TWO.  Hmm.  Step two is START A PETITION.  Get EVERY MAN TO SIGN IT.  PLEDGE we'll be perfectly courteous to women in the woods.  SIGN OUR NAMES.  OUR WORD IS OUR BOND.
    Whatever!  Last paragraph!  OH SO YOU'LL GIVE IT UP FOR THE BEAR BUT NOT FOR THE MAN?  I SEE HOW IT IS.  What?  Last paragraph!  Let's see.  I know there's one Ruffles I like and one Ruffles I don't like.  Sour Cream and Onion or Cheddar and Sour Cream.  I'm getting Cheddar and Sour Cream.  Wish me luck.  It MATTERS. The more wishes I get, the better luck I get!  The better luck I get, the more likely it is that It's The Flavor I Like Somehow.  Huh.  Anyway.  Three day weekend after this paragraph is over!  Or four day weekend.  Or INFINITE weekend if there's no more entries next week.  I DON'T KNOW EXACTLY how it's all gonna play out!  The important thing is I Keep Busy Doing Things Halfway Productive!  There's two or three books I got my eye on coming out in the next couple of weeks.  Good deal!  If I work on music, should I use a backing track of DRUM LOOP or NO backing track of DRUM LOOP.  Huh.  Flip a coin on it or something.  I dunno.  Either way, that's it for now!  I'll see ya later!

-4:58 P.M.  
   
     
      
   

Wednesday, May 1, 2024

Lookin' Good, Friends!

    What's good!  YOU LOOKIN.  Ah, wonderful.  Starting the month of May.  I enjoyed the Marijuana last night! It was only HALF as weak as previous strains, not THIRDLY as weak!  Might take some weeks off from Entry Writing coming up to Smoke Weed And Work On Music Instead.  Either way whatever.  I don't want to upset anyone, but I'm finishing the beer I have in the house TODAY.  And I'm re-upping with the super market on FRIDAY.  And I will need beer with tomorrow's entry (THURSDAY).  Hmm.  This sounds like a Michael Problem.  But it's going out OVER THE INTERNET.  To people who aren't Michael.  I'M A WALKING CONTRADICTION I AM.  I'm A Walking Contraception I Am.  TODAY IS MAYDAY.  Hopefully SOMEONE WILL HEAR OUR CRY FOR HELP.  Kind of doubt it, though.  Instead we'll just passover into TOMORROW, MEWTWO.  That's a pokemon.  Do people know Pokemon?  I wouldn't IF I WERE PEOPLE.         
     Went and got myself about 10, 15 minutes of Maintenance PsychoTherapy this morning.  SAT UP and everything.  No reclining at all!  This is how we do it in the 21st century.  Did she give me any important PERSPECTIVE for anything?  Sure.  The perspective is I'm A Broken Shell Of A Person Who Needs Maintenance PyschoTherapy Twice A Month.  And Don't I Forget It!  I think I'm gonna forget it.  Then remember it again in a couple weeks when it comes up again!  Seems fair.  Maybe one day I can ESCAPE from The Routine Therapy And Medication.  And on that day DRINKS ARE ON ME.  ALSO SOME WEED.  COKE.  LET'S HAVE A BLAST AND A HALF.  THIS IS MY NEW LIFE A-BEGINNING, let's go crazy!  Either way the point is I DON'T NEED DRUGS!  The only HIGH I NEED is CHILL TUNES, GOOD BUDS, AND SWEET VIBES.  Not sure how to accomplish any of those things.  Not even sure what 2/3 of them mean!  CHILL TUNES I CAN AT LEAST UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF THOUGH.  So LET'S START TEHRE.
    I like the alphabet song.  Off the top of my head that's one of my Faves.  Twinkle Twinkle is up there.  Baah Baah Black Sheep.  There's lots of good songs out there in the universe for MusicHead Aficionados like me to get a kick out of if you know where to look!  I don't know Bah Bah Black Sheep that well.  I know the first line.  BAH BAH BLACK SHEEP...  That's it.  DUNNO THE REST.  CAUSE I'M A DAMN FOOL THAT'S WHY.  Or maybe I have different priorities for knowing stuff.  I just KNOW.  SO MUCH.  OTHER THINGS.  In my brain!  I CAN'T PHYSICALLY CONTAIN ANY MORE KNOWLEDGE.  That's how that works.  I only have four more episodes off The Brady Bunch left to watch!  Then I gotta figure out another TV show to binge watch!  Should be interesting should I decide to watch a 21st century show! Totally different animal! Maybe some sort of GOAT or something.  Not the Greatest Of All Time at something.  I mean a BAAHHH goat.  Wait a minute.  Goats go BAAH, not unlike Black Sheep, don't they.  Internet says, "Bleat," or, "Maa"  Huh.  Probably should have covered this in Pre School.
    Fourth paragraph!  Every couple of months I go on a spree of Unsubscribing to Junk E-mails, Specifically Campaign Donation Emails, and I briefly get excited WAIT, DOES THIS MEAN... IS IT POSSIBLE... NO MORE SPAM Donation Emails?!!?!  And of course that gets Reset Back To Zero and I NEVER NOTICE NO CHANGE IN TE VOLUME OF SPAM the next day.  But ya know what?  Since this last round of me doing it?  HAVEN'T BEEN ANY SPAM IN E-MAILS IN TEH LAST COUPLE OF DAYS.  I WIN.  What else is up.  What's my favorite kind of e-mail to get.  Gotta be SOME sort of e-mail that I Actually Appreciate.  Hmm.  NOPE.  Now that I'm browsing through Old Ones, Not seeing ANY E-Mails that actually give me any sort of positive reactions.  AH WELL.  E-Mail Is A Bust.  SEE YA LATER E-MAIL.  Whatever.  I dunno.  Hmm.  JUST OCCURRED TO ME I haven't said anything funny IN AT LEAST Sentences.  Could easily be WEEKS.  So that's definitely something to keep an eye on!
    Fifth paragraph.  Might have to start smoking the New Marijuana out of the Regular Pipe instead of the MicroPipe that's designed to look like a Cigarette.  IT LOOKS LIKE A CIGARETTE.  And it has a little space you put the weed in that it's like you'd be spiking the cigarette with weed.  But then there's Nothing Else!  It's just all hollowed out besides that!  EITHER WAY instead of doing that a couple of times, might just have One Hit of Regular Pipe going forward.  YES.  Maybe Probably should start Break From Website next week.  This week was Shitty As Shit!  It'd be nice to REDEEM MYSELF and write a good week.  But whose to say that it would pan out like that!  I dunno.  The Intelligencia.  GOOD I TRUST EM.  GOTTA TRUST SOMEBODY.  I guess.  Haven't heard from my Brother in a few days.  POSSIBLE he realized making a film is very difficult!  Maybe he doesn't have it in him to do it!  I SHOULDA FIGURED he'd run back home, tail between his legs.  JUST GOES TO SHOW.  Show what.  YEAH.
   Halfway through the entry!  I realized It Would Be A Lot Of Work For Him when I was watching the credits to some film a few days ago.  The credits were rolling and they were showing still images of something to the left and right of the credits intermittedently and I was like MY BROTHER IS GOING TO DO ALL THAT CRAP BY HIMSELF?  C'MON.  I DON'T THINK SO.  Maybe he is.  Maybe that's EXACTLY WHAT'S GOING TO DO.  I guess I'm gonna have a better idea What He's Gonna Do after First Session Of Filming!  Also HOW WILL WE HAVE CREDITS FOR OUR FILM.  There's TWO credits.  Him... Me... TEH END.  Probably SPECIAL SHOUT OUTS to my parents.  TEH END.  I want to play a song over the credits!  I feel we can violate International Copyright law at least ONCE for the film.  Put in a song OVER TEH CREDITS.  But there need to BE CREDITS to play a song over the credits.  So in the end I GUESS THAT'S ROBERT'S DEPARTMENT.  That's my brother's name.  ROBERT'S DEPARTMENT.
   Seventh paragraph.  Four more to go!  Wonderful.  Why did Mike Brady design a house such that six children had to share one bathroom.  He may have designed the house for Three Children.  And also kind of none of your business?  I think when I was a kid I went through a couple of year phase where I wanted to be an architect.  WHY.  Because I wanted to DESIGN HOUSES!  WHY.  FOR FUN.  WHY.  I don't know!  I'm not a VISUAL CREATIVE TYPE GUY REALLY.  Just WAS KINDA STUPID for a 2 or 3 year phase in my childhood I guess!  WANTED TO BE SOMETHING I HAD NO RIGHT WANTING TO BE.  GO FIGURE.  On the other hand if I was an architect Right Now WE WOULDN'T BE IN THIS MESS.  We'd be in a Standard The Sims House type deal.  That's what I'm capable of building.  POOL IN THE BACKYARD.  I CAN DO IT AS WELL AS YOU. Maybe a SECOND FLOOR on top of the first one.  I think I've made my point pretty clearly.
    Three paragraphs to go!  I don't like today's entry!  But it's teaching us all a valuable lesson of HUBRIS!  So there's that.  I haven't learnt anything and neither have you.  BUT TE POINT IS if we can SALVAGE ANYTHING it's that IT'S FUNNY that I'M DOING POORLY.  We can FIND HUMOUR that I'M EMBARASSING MYSELF.  It's AMUSING to watch someone NOT ACHIEVE THEIR GOALS.  That's all I got, anyway!  That's what I'm banking on!  What else is up.  Only drinking one beer with today's entry!  Then only one with tomorrow!  Cause that's all I have left in the house!  SURE I can pick up more On A Walk instead of waiting for Super Market Beer BUT I DON'T PLAY THOSE GAMES.  I play Duck Duck GOOSE.  Or Pin The Tail On That DONKEY.  I've never played Pin The Tail On The Donkey.  Sounds dangerous!  Pretty sure we've Canceled that game in the 21st century.  Hmm.  I didn't even play it in the 1990's.  GOOD.    
    HOW is the game, "Mother May I," not just called, "Excuse Me, do I have permission For Winning The Game?"  Is it not essentially Do you give me approval to cross the finish line first?  I may not remember the rules 100%.  I think it's just Each Participant Asks The Leader if they can move forward incrementally.  And sometimes the leader says YES and sometimes they say NO.  And the first person who crosses the finish line wins!  SEEMS LIKE A DUMB GAME but then again YOU'D SEEM LIKE A DUMB PERSON TO THE GAME SO MAYBE YUO SHOULDN'T JUDGE.  Whatever.  IS, "Mother, May I?" a passive aggressive question?  YES.  I mean, sure, it depends on context.  BUT 80% of the time it sounds pretty passive aggressive.  Or just aggressive.  I DON'T LIKE IT is the point.  Anyway.  I wonder if people in my Improv Class have NOTICED I never tell monologues.  It occurred to me JUST NOW because I just remembered A MONOLOGUE I CAN TELL.  It's A GAME OF MOTHER MAY I I played.  I COULDA TOLD A MONOLOGUE ABOUT IT in Improv Class.  WOW.  It was IN ELEMENTARY SCHOOL.  It was AFTER SCHOOL.  IN TEH LUNCH ROOM.  WE PLAYED IT.... And that's what Mother May I makes me think of.
    Last paragraph of the day!  Good stuff.  I was waiting for my Mom to be done with her P.T.A. chores.  I was probably dealing with PERSONAL EMOTIONAL ISSUES at the time.  FEELING LONELY AND WHATKNOT.  Didn't have many friends at the time.  And by many I mean ANY.  Take away the, "M," in the word!  It makes it MORE accurate by using LESS letters!  Go figure!  AND THAT'S what Mother Makes May I think of!  I HAD OTHER FRIENDS IN OTHER CONTEXTS.  BUT NOT IN LUNCH ROOM AFTER SCHOOL CONTEXT.  And that's what Lunch Room makes me think of.  Ugh.  Any.  Many.  Plenty.  Seventy.  Lots of words that end with, "any..."  Ugh.  WELL THAT'S GOOD.  It's the lunch room but this isn't in lunch context.  IT'S A POST LUNCH CONTEXT.  Go figure!  Well that's about it for today.  My favorite genre going on right now is Post-Lunch.  Well sure why not.  I'll see ya tomorrow!

-5:02 P.M.   
 
   

Contact: mankindguy@gmail.com