Tuesday, November 30, 2021 

Oh Right I Gotta Do This

    Hey friends!  Last day of the month.  You know what that means!  SEVERAL things.  And different things for You and for Me.  But for me the main thing I'm thinking of is check my weight tomorrow for first time in a month.  Scary!  What if it's a number that's a let down.  As The Beatles say in their first main song they play in documentary Don't Let Me Down.  SEE I was paying attention.  I get it.  Also I'm about 75% into the first of three portions of documentary and NOT IMPRESSED SO FAR.  Yes the Beatles show A LOT of potential-- they got the pieces.  But the songs so far aren't AMAZING.  And I doubt they ever will be.  Also it made me realize oh right I could never be in a band.  I'm about 2% as good as they are on guitar and/or singing.  But when it comes to lyrics I'm a solid FIFTEEN Percent as good as them so I got that going for me at least.
    Wait a second.  I'm not as good as The Beatles?  HOW WILL I EVER SUCCEED AT ANYTHING.  What else is going on.  Enjoying this DARK Cherry soda.  I feel Black Cherry is a little iffy.  Safer to say DARK Cherry.  I dunno that might be making it worse.  I guess we'll see if I get any Anger E-mails based on this.  What else is going on.  Probably should start eating bigger breakfasts even before entirely adjusting diet.  I've been snacking a lot after breakfasts because I'm still hungry!  So just eat bigger breakfasts from now on is my impression.  Bigger breakfasts can be more healthy.  I bump up from a Pop Tart to a healthy frozen egg sandwich-- bigger breakfast-- but a lot healthier--!!! ---New Sentence.  The Mets didn't re-sign Friend Of The Franchise Javier Baez!  What are they dumb or something.  Yep must be.  Only explanation I can come up with.  A bunch of them sitting around a table and they're like should we give Javy Baez some money to play for us and then everyone else is like DUHHHH I'M AN IDIOT and then the first guy is like THEN IT'S SETTLED WE'RE DUMB.
     Ugh.  I dunno.  Gonna experiment with putting in half the cream in my coffee today.  TO PARTLY MAKE UP FOR BONUS SNACKING.  I'm checking MY WEIGHT tomorrow I don't wanna be going into that with a Relatively Too Much Calorie Day!  Maybe I do!  That'll give me an excuse if it's higher than I want!  Well clearly I'm 2 and a half pounds heavier than I would be otherwise because I ate 150 calories more yesterday than I was aiming for.  Makes sense to me.  Anyway so far not impressed with Ringo Starr.  He thinks he's above everyone.  Just because he's physically above everyone for some reason.  He and his drums are on a platform.  I think?  Maybe I was imagining that.  Trick photography to give that illusion.  Either way GET IN THERE RINGO You're part of this band too BE PART OF THE CONVERSATION.
     Anyway.  Maybe that's what Don't Let Me Down was about.  Keep Ringo up on that drum platform.  Don't even let him down if he wants to come down.  Rest of The Beatles don't want him as part of the conversation.  CRACKED THAT CODE.  NEXT.  Anyway.  Mets team is pretty good right now.  I think if they make 1 or 2 great signings I'm SUPER on board.  And you want me on board.  I'm a good guy to have in your corner!  Which I believe is a boxing reference.  Yeah it probably is.  But really what difference does it make who you have in your corner.  Wow this one guy is saying some REALLY INSPIRING WORDS mid-boxing match.  Now I REALLY wanna win at boxing.  C'mon.  You're halfway through the match.  How much are some words gonna mean.  Just squirt some water into my mouth which anybody can do and let me move on with this boxing match.  Somewhere in that paragraph I went from third person to first person.  Amazing!
     Cool.  BOY ALL THIS BOXING IS MAKING ME THIRSTY.  That's what people are constantly thinking while boxing.  If I'm 2% as good as Beatles at music what percent am I as good as Boxers at boxing.  Probably about a third of a percent.  I DO have all the required limbs.  I got that part down pretty good.  But that's about it.  Also my right arm might fall off at some point this or next week.  So I better get into that boxing match QUICK before that happens.  Anyway.  I think the Beatles care too much about chords.  They're always like OKAY D now we're going into G.  Just go with the flow, man!  The chords will work themselves out.  You just concentrate on making that music!  Huh.  HMM interesting.  D going into G.  That's what's in my head.  I could see that chord progression being fun.  Hey time for half as fun coffee!
    HEY that's not bad!  I successfully put in as much cream as I wanted-- just about half as normal-- and put in one bonus Artificial Sweetener (AS) and it tastes just fine!  I can do this FROM NOW ON.  WOW THIS IS A GAME CHANGER.  For the better!  This game just got a little changed!  Anyway what's going on in the wide world of sports.  I can't wait to see Max Scherzer have to say nice things about the Mets.  Because apparently during trade deadline a few months ago he was anti-Going To Mets.  And now HE HAS TO be like YEAH THE METS ARE GREAT LET'S DO THIS I LOVE METS.  NOW WHOSE THE IDIOT.  And all we had to do was pay him ONE HUNDRED AND THIRTY MILLION DOLLARS.  Sounds like a fair deal.  He looks The Fool for now having to be pro-Mets so that alone is worth the money.
    Sure.  Maybe he never gives that statement.  Maybe he says I still hate The Mets but I'm gonna pitch every fifth day because that's my job.  In which case I KIND OF LIKE THAT?  It's INTERESTING.  I like interesting dynamics.  Like Yoko Ono just sitting with the band for some reason.  Not in the background.  Just right up in their little circle.  Good for her!  She's an inspiration to us all.  And by Us All I mean We The Beatles.  And by We The Beatles I mean Jonathon Lennon.  And by Jonathon Lennon I mean Yoko Ono.  And by Yoko Ono I mean Chairs.  Hey great what is this the seventh paragraph.  Based on enjoying this diet wild cherry pepsi I might go back to regular diet pepsi instead of coke zero Week In Week Out.  It's good to have options is the point.  No it's not.  Confusing!  Give me a life with no options and I'll have a life with no confusion.
    Huh.  The point is is there anyway by watching this documentary we can go back in time and warn John Lennon not to provoke someone into shooting him?  Just tell him BE NICER TO THIS ONE GUY TRUST US IT'LL WORK OUT FOR YOU.  Not sure if the guy who shot John Lennon had a problem with him specifically.  He had good reasons to kill him SURE.  But it's entirely possible he was like well John Lennon himself is okay but I got good OTHER reasons for doing what I'm doing.  Sounds reasonable.  What else sounds reasonable.  Lots of things.  Probably 70% of things in the universe sound pretty reasonable.  Maybe even more.  But you won't hear about THAT in the news these days.  Maybe you will.  The point is do I like Paul McCartney more because he's a lefty?  Yes of course!  I think Ringo is a lefty too.  Better LTURQ.  YEP.  But McCartney plays GUITAR.  Left Handed Guitar.  THAT'S WHAT I DO. So basically we're Brothers. 
    I'm 2% as good as him but that's Brothers For Ya.  Also got a nice beard going this documentary.  I LIKE it.  He's the one with the beard, right.  I can't 100% picture it from last night.  Oh well no way of knowing.  Unless I google Paul McCartney Beard Documentary.  Also Spoiler Alert I just spelled Documentary right consciously for the first time Possibly EVER.  Okay now time to Google that.  YEP I think it's him.  Great.  What else is going on.  I thought me snacking too much this morning was a terrible thing.  If it inspires me to drink half as much cream per day that ends up being a HUGE thing in my favor!  AMAZING.  Life throws you lemons then you make coke with lemon.  Use that lemon as a garnish is a point.  Possibly THE point!  Delicious!  Also the Beatles are smoking all the time.  Good for them.  I hope they enjoy themselves.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Looks like the Consensus of Sports Headlines for The Mets signing Max Scherzer was Meet The Max.  Not loving it!  I guess it's kind of fun.  More fun than NOTHING.  But I think they could have done better.  Off the top of my head what could I come up with?  Hmm.  THE METS ARE... METS... MAX SCHER... HERE COMES MAX SCHERZER TO PLAY FOR THE METS!  This is harder than it looks!  Just like playing music.  The Beatles REALLY know what they're doing.  They just go for it and it sounds great.  The point is the contract Baez got I feel The Mets could have easily done better.  But what do I know.  Maybe they got their eyes set on an even better player.  PAUL MCCARTNEY MAYBE???  He's left handed.  That's valuable in baseball sometimes!  What else is going on.  I feel like this is it for Act I!  And to accomplish it all I had to do was write NOTHING interesting or funny or new.  Be back in a bit.

No One Else Is Gonna

    Hey!  This works out great.  I wanted a slightly bigger breakfast.  The calories saved on coffee creamer DIRECTLY CORRESPOND with what I want out of a bigger breakfast.  LIFE IS GOOD.  As long as this lasts.  Gotta imagine pretty soon I will lose enthusiasm for this new development.  VERY soon.  But for now LIFE IS GOOD.  Anyway what else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Phone crapped out on me 2/3rds into my recent walk.  I had to walk 10 minutes without listening to music LIKE A CHUMP.  How do other people do it.  Relatively easily.  It was easy for me!  IN FACT I LIKED IT.  We all need a break from things once in a while.  I think that's the song coming up in the next half hour of Beatles Documentary.  We All Need A Break [From Things (Once In A While)].  Also when it comes to titles?  27.5% as good as The Beatles.  I mean that as a brag, too.  A big brag!
    Wonderful.  I think I still have a Raspberry Snapple from last week mixed among my newer Lemon Snapples.  Should I look fir it consciously or just be surprised when I come across it and start drinking it.  Let's go with Surprise.  Sounds fun.  Not sure why Stephen Spielberg directed A The Westside Story.  Seems kind of beneath him.  Also I don't like it.  Maybe he'll make me like it.  He's a good film maker per my understanding.  Also I assume in 4 years we will be treated to a The East Side Story: The Lost World.  What else is going on.  For some reason I thought that joke was The Tops.  I was like I'm getting A LOT out of this, "The Lost World," joke.  Other people are probably getting SOME out of it.  In retrospect I was barely getting anything out of it and other people are actively disliking it.  Hey that's life!
     Anyway.  Wonder when I see the next movie in theater will be.  And what'll it be.  Gotta be something good.  Here's hoping they re-release Jurassic Park II: The Lost World.  I'd watch that in the theater!  FUN movie.  Fun movie to see in theater!  What else is going on.  No good Health Frozen Breakfast Sandwiches on normal Super Market Delivery.  Would have to go with Amazon Fresh for those.  I can do that!  Not for upcoming week probably.  But in the short-mid-term-future!  Amazing.  I think I have a single breakfast sandwich loose in the freezer right now.  Not sure what brand or what flavor or how healthy.  But I'll eat that because it's there.  That's what the guy who ate Mount Everest said.  Why did I eat it?  BECAUSE IT WAS THERE.  That sort of thing.  HEY I'm three paragraphs into this act already?  AMAZING.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  This is going swimmingly.  Which is good!  Everyone likes swimming because the alternative is drowning.  So clearly swimming is the best of the two.  That could be an Olympic Event.  How long can you stay underwater Alive.  They might have a lot of deaths on their hands, particularly in the qualifying matches where people don't know what they're doing, but in the end it's kind of worth it to see participants at the top of their fields compete with one another.  Hmm.  The point is I think the people associated with The Beatles in various jobs and roles are kind of idiots?  I woulda guessed that without seeing the documentary but now I know for sure!  Oh well they're doing their best.  Probably.  If I was them I'd be trying to do my best.  Probably.  Maybe not!  I can't put myself in their shoes exactly.  Probably thrown out at this point.  Those shoes from 50 years ago are LONG gone.
      Last paragraph before Shower Circumstance which will actually be Bathing Experience.  I like how George Harrison is talking about Eric Clapton a lot.  I read a book about Eric Clapton and I REMEMBER George Harrison was a big fan and friend.  So now I know for sure AND it makes me feel like some sort of big shot Music Super Fan.  Music Super Fans are Big Shots right.  As long as this documentary is in the cultural groove its in being a big fan is a big shot!  Alright Music Super Fans ya got a week at most left to enjoy your status.  I don't consider myself a Music Super Fan but I do consider myself a Super Music Fan.  I am a fan of Super Music.  What I consider Super Music at least.  Which turns out amazingly is 100% Accurate.  What divine providence!  HEY this act is over.  I'll be back in a little bit.

Not On My Watch

    Hello friends.  Five more paragraphs.  Then the day is wide open!  Presumably make some progress watching The Beatles beatle it up.  Let's get Ringo engaged.  I wanna hear more from Ringo!  He controls the drums so you definitely want him on your side.  The point is I'm gonna pour delicious second cup of coffee after this paragraph.  Probably will be delicious with half the cream as I've used to use!  GAME CHANGER.  Couldn't have come at a better time.  The end of the month.  Perfect time to mix things up.  Now I can say for future reference yeah I started using less creamer exactly December 2021.  Which I imagine will come up all the time.  When I'm talking to imaginary people.  Because I don't see myself talking to real people.  And if I am I'm gonna have to work very hard to make this come up naturally.  Imagine having that conversation with someone.  How much fun would that be.
    What else is going on.  Coffee is delicious even with slightly less cream than the first cup!  GAME CHANGER.  That's three times I've called attention to the fact that it's a game changer.  At this point it's just The New Game.  We gotta get used to it!  At this point I need to write four more paragraphs.  That's just The Game We Live In.  CAN'T get used to it.  Gotta make progress!  Getting used to it is Accepting Defeat!  What else is going on.  NATIONAL FOOD OF THE DAY DAY.  National Mason Jar Day and National Mousse Day.  Well Mousse is like cake.  Chocolate cake.  I like everyone else am on board with chocolate cake.  Mason Jar?  Not sure we're supposed to be eating those!  Made of glass!  9 times out of 10 you should NOT be eating glass.  Better LTURQ.  YEP DON'T EAT GLASS.  ALMOST NEVER.
    Sure.  Great.  What else is going on.  Wish I had more to look forward to today other than Beatles Doc.  Beatles Doc is GREAT don't get me wrong.  But it's a REALLY GREAT B thing to do during the day.  I need an A thing.  Hmm.  Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- It is not possible to tickle yourself.  Stop Saying That!  I proved you wrong the first time.  I'd have thought after that humiliating defeat you'd Recall all Snapple bottles to make sure nobody ever has to see that, "FACT," again!  Anyway what else is going on.  I RARELY have an, "A," thing to get me through the day.  Yeah but I manage somehow.  Not sure how.  But I guess I'll figure it out all over again somehow today.  There's like eight Marvel TV Mini Series I can watch.  I like the Marvel Universe just fine.  It's one of my favorite universes after ours of course.  REALLY pot committed to Our Universe.  I feel VERY MUCH invested in it.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Least favorite universe?  LEGO EXTENDED UNIVERSE.  Just don't like it!  Sue me.  I DARE YA.  I'LL COUNTER SUE YOU FOR ALL YOUR MARBLES.  YOU JUST FELL RIGHT INTO MY TRAP.  Huh.  Gonna take a walk soon after this is done.  Because I'm already behind schedule slightly!  I guess that's a fun thing to do.  I get to walk around the neighborhood and listen to the music on the phone.  Better than doing nothing.  Kind of IS doing nothing.  That's what Nothing is to me the last 8 months.  Walking and Music.  Sorta Baseline of my life.  GOOD Baseline.  I get kicks out of it and whatnot!  Anyway this is a nice Sunday Lackadaisical Entry.  It's the weekend!  Relax a little!  Get off my back about it.  What do you mean today is Tuesday.  Fine.  So it's Tuesday.  Tuesday isn't so far of from being the Weekend.  ALMOST AS FAR OFF AS YOU CAN BE.  Yeah ALMOST.  But not quite.  Tuesday and Thursday are practically the weekend.  The only day that isn't the Weekend is Wednesday.  Every other day you can make a case for!
      Last paragraph of the day.  Amazing!  What's the good news about what kind of breakfasts I will have moving forward.  Ultimately I think healthy Egg Based Frozen Sandwiches are the answer for maybe 50% of the time.  But that's not in the cards FOR NOW.  HMM.  This is gonna be a tough one but I anticipate having A BLAST figuring it out.  Perhaps even A BLAST AND A HALF.  Anyway great just great.  Wait a second.  This entry has been NOT GOOD.  I was gonna say Terrible but I think NOT GOOD covers it slightly better.  In aw ay it's worse!  Terribleness is a little subjective-ly as an adjective.  NOT GOOD is more concrete and universally understood.  DAMNIT.  I hate when my mediocrity is concrete and universally understood.  And the worst part is IT HAPPENS ALL THE TIME.  Anyway.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-2:12 P.M.

Monday, November 29, 2021 

I'm Open To Ideas

    Hello friends.  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  PEOPLE IN THE NEWS are very concerned about new Covid Strain.  Now I don't know what to think!  Roughly 60% of the time we should trust people in the news.  I LIKE THOSE ODDS.  Not for bad things.  Like this.  In those case I like those odds in terms of Prediction but I dislike those odds in terms of them determining the outcome of a negative thing.  That sort of thing.  Anyway the point is at some point I'm gonna need to learn how to spell Omicron and maybe I just did it correctly on my first try ever and maybe I didn't!  Better LTURQ.  HEY I DID IT.  Why was I in my head about it.  I was worried about nothing!  It was pretty easy and intuitive to spell in the end.  So at least we have that going for us.  Also OH MY CRON.  Is that anything.  We'll have to figure that out over the coming weeks. 
    Chyron.  Lots of cable news Chyrons about Ohmycron.  Is that anything.  That's even less something than just, "Oh My Cron."  That ain't good.  Anyway expecting Amazon Fresh delivery within a few hours re-upping with some soda.  We're talkin Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi.  We're talkin brand I never heard of Black Cherry 6 pack of cans.  We're talkin miscellaneous other items that aren't beverages and will not be consumed imminently.  Also I didn't realize it at the time but I'm really leaning into the Cherry.  Guess there's some deep rooted psychological subconscious reason for that.  It was available on Amazon Fresh.  OH that's the hidden reason.  Fascinating stuff!  When I used to go to regular super market they had diet pepsi and diet wild cherry pepsi.  And my Mom would drink wild cherry but not regular.  It was a big deal!  C'mon you can't even tell the difference.  You're just being difficult.  Is how I felt.  I put it in italics because it was a feeling.  Oh okay.
     Amazing.  Hey I've been worried subconsciously the last two paragraphs about Chyron.  Wait no.  Omicron.  I can't start calling it Chyron.  OR CAN I.  That might be just the thing-em-up that gets people goin'!  Huh.  WAIT A SECOND.  If you spell Omicron backwards it's NORCIMO.  WHAT'S THAT ALL ABOUT.  Huh.  WAIT I JUST FIGURED IT OUT.  That's how we solve Omicron.  GIVE IT TO PEOPLE BACKWARDS.  It negates the virus!  Anyway.  Started watching The The Beatles Documentary.  We're talkin' I watched the first 7 minutes which was an introductory Crash Course into The Beatles.  Before the crux of the documentary started.  INTERESTING.  SO you're saying Them Beatles WERE A BAND OF SOME SORT?  VERY interesting.  Anyway I like it a lot so far and I've barely gotten started!  So far my least favorite Beatle is RINGO STARR.  They call attention to the fact he appears in a non-Beatles movie when none of the rest of them does.  STICK TO MUSIC.  Also USE STICKS TO MAKE MUSIC.  That's YOUR JOB.
     Penultimate paragraph before coffee.  Hmm that's one way to start talking about 4th overall paragraphs.  Anyway.  I'm just kidding about Ringo Starr.  He's one of the 50% of Beatles who could theoretically at some point read this entry.  That being said my least favorite Beatle is GEORGE HARRISON.  What's he gonna do about it.  NOTHIN'.  Can't do a thing.  He's busy being dead!  HEY GEORGE HARRISON IS ONE OF MY FAVORITE BEATLES WHERE DO YOU GET OFF.  I dunno.  What else is going on.  I successfully Actually Shaved last night.  Did it totally proficiently and everything.  Felt like I nicked my upper lip but there was no blood or anything so looks like I'm Doing Great.  Also The Beatles PROBABLY ARE bigger than Jesus.  He was from 2000 years ago.  Probably was 5'5, 5'6 TOPS.  People were still short back then!  Hmm how tall are the Beatles.  Probably taller than that.
    The point is Am I Bigger Than Jesus?  I haven't seen any scholarly debate over that subject but there is a slight possibility I am.  "It's not the size of the man it's the motion of his ocean"-- Jesus Christ.  That's from the Bible.  One of them.  Probably.  I gotta stop checking twitter.  I feel like their news/tweets-they're-pushing-on-me algorithm has caught up with me and is very well designed to make me angry.  Is there a way I can reset this algorithm.  And/or correct it to make me happy?  My guess?  NOPE.  It is what it is.  Well they clearly went too far.  Made me TOO angry!  Now I wanna log off completely.  Let that be a lesson for ya.  You being Twitter.  Twitter is among the 50% of Social Media Websites designed to make us angry that are still alive and may be reading this entry.  What's the ones that are dead.  Social Media websites can't die.  WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.
    Look I tried logging off of twitter but I logged right back in!  If I'm not on twitter how will I read UPDATES on things.  Also there's SPORTS NEWS going on.  Mets are waiting to see if Top Baseball Pitcher will accept their Contract Offer.  I MUST KNOW TEN MINUTES BEFORE I WOULD KNOW BY CHECKING METS WEBSITE.  Also just gives me something to do.  I can Refresh Twitter ALL DAY LONG.  Without that what am I supposed to do.  Refresh other websites that don't have Anger Algorithms.  What's a website without anger algorithms.  No website at all!  This website doesn't have anger algorithms.  It may make you angry.  But there's no algorithms involved.  So there's that.  Why would it make you angry.  Hmm.  I'm sure there's plenty of good reasons to get angry based on this website.  I just don't know them off the top of my head.
     Anyway.  Seventh paragraph!  Amazing.  The good news is I'm gonna take a walk relatively soon and I'm pretty confident OMICRON isn't here yet.  I'm gonna get DOZENS of walks in without being concerned about Omicron personally.  Make em count that's what I say.  Well I'm saying it now at least.  Anyway.  THE METS MAY SIGN A GREAT PLAYER.  This is the most exciting thing since Last Night when it was first reported The Mets May Sign A Great Player.  I'm excited.  I think it's pretty impressive that Twitter Anger Algorithm works both on my phone and on my website.  They do it based on accounts not based on devices.  Good for them.  They've got it all figured out I guess.  Except for how one day I will log off and that'll be it!  Maybe go back to MySpace.  I don't think MySpace ever had an anger algorithm.  How would that work.  WHAT THE HELL THESE TOP 6 SPACES OF MY FRIENDS AREN'T THE ONES I INTENDED.  INFURIATING.  BETTER CLICK ON THEM A LOT BECAUSE I'M ANGRY.
     Eighth paragraph!  Anyway.  Right arm below the shoulder still hurts a bit.  Mostly when I do push-ups.  But I still do 'em!  No pain no gain.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Pretty sure a bunch of time You Gain you don't have to go through Pain.  Amazing.  I like how if you're looking at Most Recent posts on a trending topic such as Mets Signing Baseball Player Or Not every 8 seconds someone posts a fake tweet trying to trick people that they made the signing.  What the Hell is wrong with people.  I'M GONNA GET PEOPLE GOOD.  Look I can get SOME dumb people thinking that's fun and/or clever and/or will be effective.  But NOT THIS MANY.  OH NO I'M GETTING ANGRY AGAIN.  Now it's at dumb people and not at algorithms!  Also it's not so much Anger as it is Pity.  These people need help.  And I can't help them.  No Pain No Gain.  Huh?
     Ninth paragraph.  What else is going on NOT in the wide world of sports.  New month in a couple of days.  HEY that reminds me.  What's the Patriotism National Food Day Of The Day.  National Lemon Cream Pie Day.  Never knew Lemon Cream Pie was such an important thing.  Never even heard of that exact combination of words.  Either way I can see myself trying that I guess.  I don't like pie but THEORETICALLY I would like pie.  I like the Pie part of Pie but most of the time probably not the innards.  I like Lemon Flavored Things.  I like some Creams and I don't like other Creams!  I'm gonna have to look into this further to really make an informed impression on it.  Which I WILL NOT.  So I will never make an informed impression on it.  EVER!  What's going on again.  I lost track of what was going on.  That hardly ever happens.  I'm usually laser focused on what's going on and good at sticking with it from sentence to sentence.
     Last paragraph of the act!  LOOKS LIKE THE METS OFFER TO GREAT BASEBALL PLAYER IS A THREE YEAR DEAL.  That's what I like to see.  Four years would be too much!  Two years is good theoretically because he's very old and old people are unreliable, but I like the idea of getting this player for exactly three years.  Now I'm REALLY on board.  I'd like to be signed to a FOUR YEAR DEAL personally.  You'd think I'd rather be signed even longer but maybe I want to retire after four years.  Have you considered that?  I can retire halfway through a contract.  Whose gonna stop me.  Maybe the terms of the contract.  Interesting counterpoint.  Maybe Twitter isn't doing an Anger Algorithm.  Maybe THE NEWS is really just amping up it's headlines and framings to make me personally angry.  Hmm.  Seems plausible.  Anyway I'm gonna take a walk now.  Be back soon!
 

What Have You Got

    Hey I'm back.  Anything new to be angry about.  Amazon Fresh delivery should be here sometime this act.  Before shower circumstance.  That's a new way to describe Cleansing Experience.  Shower Circumstance!  I like it.  Even if I take a bath.  I feel like even a bath is a Shower Circumstance.  Oh no that might make some of you angry.  Now I see how this website could be enraging.  I get it!  Wonderful.  Gotta get something.  Hmm get a Diet Lemon Iced Tea Snapple Experience.  Lemme go do that.  In the meantime though what's going on.  Looks like Mets forming a partnership deal with Baseball Pitcher is imminent.  That's good news.  Everyone wins.  THAT'S IMPOSSIBLE.  There must be losers somewhere.  Probably multiple losers!  My guess is somehow the Mets end up losing.  Yes but WHO ARE The Mets.  Franchise ownership money?  The players?  The fans?  THE STADIUM?  My guess is it's THE STADIUM that ends up losing.
    Interesting.  Lemon Iced Tea Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- A group of goats is called a trip.  Been there done that.  If you know what I mean!  I think you do.  It was a very strange way to phrase it but I think you can intuitively crack the code of more or less what I was trying to get across.  Anyway this stadium ain't so great.  I've talked time and time again about how it's a death trap.  Sober people can easily trip on the stairs and fall down to the stadium grounds below, let alone people filled up with beer and/or hot dogs.  Hot dogs especially.  Their full bellies will upset their equilibrium balance and then BOOM you're falling off Stadium Balconies before you know it.  HEY that's one of the Miscellaneous I'm getting from Amazon Fresh.  Reduced Fat Hot Dogs!  They don't sell 'em at regular Super Market Delivery.  I CAN HAVE ONE AND A HALF REDUCED FAT HOT DOGS WHERE I WOULD NORMALLY JUST HAVE ONE.  Delicious AND Practical.
     Anyway.  What else is going on.  LOOK that means a normal meal would now be three hot dogs and two pieces of bread PLUS SIDES.  Delicious AND VERY Practical.  What was I talking about.  How many times do I have to talk about falling off the CitField Balconies.  AS MANY TIMES AS IT TAKES to get that death trap closed down for good.  Build a stadium with more pronounced steps.  I want BIGGER STEPS.  It's because the steps are so close together and tiny that makes them hard for your feet to get a good grip.  We need to go back to the drawing board and build another 600 million dollar stadium.  Figure that's on the low end these days for how much a stadium costs.  Don't worry the city will pay for it for dumb reason.  Oh whew that's a relief.  So it's for free.  Nobody pays anything.  Well the city does.  Yeah but in the end what does that really mean.  Nothing.
     Sure.  Penultimate paragraph before Shower Circumstance.  Gotta imagine in New Mets Stadium there'll be showers for fans.  You get all worked up and sweaty during the game, you can't return home in those conditions.  Gotta Group Shower!  Can't we set up individual shower cubicles.  Nope it's gotta be a group shower.  That's part of The Baseball Experience!  The main part.  LOOK am I a little concerned my arm is gonna come off while doing a push-up?  Yes.  A VERY LITTLE concerned.  Almost 100% it won't happen.  But in the end is that such a bad thing.  The world has many great opportunities for those with one arm and one stump at the shoulder.  Possibly MORE opportunities than the Two Armed.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  LOOKS LIKE THE DEAL will be made AND IT'S FOR 3 YEARS.  Who cares how much he's getting paid per year.  IT'S THREE YEARS just like EVERYONE wanted.
    Huh.  What else is going on.  I have a good feeling the next act will be better.  I feel like this act I COULD have written better-- I had it in me-- I just didn't.  But I think I still have that same thing in me for NEXT act.  Feelin' good about it.  Wonderful.  Also if you have one arm you can wear a t-shirt that says Armed And Dangerous.  Sure the two armed are also armed but if you have one arm people would really hone in on the pun and be like well he's having fun with his disability that's good for him AND me.  Now I'M more comfortable with it.  What a great t-shirt.  His AND MINE life is better now thanks to t-shirts.  That sort of thing.  HEY just accepted Amazon Fresh delivery.  Went pretty good!  I got BREAD STICKS and they were smaller than I anticipated but also less calories.  But MORE CALORIES PER AMOUNT OF BREADSTICK that I anticipated.  Oh well you take what you can get.  Time for A Shower Circumstance.  By which I mean a Cleansing Experience.  By which I mean a Bathing Exercise.

That's A New One

    Hey!  Mets signed their player.  Now he belongs to them!  He just made a deal with the Devil.  Huh.  Either way I'm trying this off brand Black Cherry soda and it's delicious!  Also I assume Black Cherry is like Black Irish.  In that I Don't Know What Either One Means.  The point is been snacking too much these first few hours of the day.  I'll survive because Too Much means like 100 calories more than I want and in the end NEGLIGIBLE.  But for now I Don't Like It!  Anyway.  Mets gotta put Max Scherzer on a STRICT low animal cracker diet.  Also it's time Once And For All to determine how to spell Scherzer.  Lemme LTURQ.  SCHERZER.  That shouldn't be so hard.  IT WILL BE for a while.  But it shouldn't be.  Oh well that's life.  You want the pitcher you gotta take the name that he goes by too.  Doesn't seem fair but life isn't fair.
     Hey great what else is going on.  Also I kinda knew going into this Drama that Max Scherzer KIND OF looks like a jerk.  And I saw a picture of him just now which confirmed my suspicions.  I'm not saying he IS a jerk.  I'm saying PHYSICAL APPEARENCEWISE.  Something kinda jerky about him.  Maybe because of his pitching motion.  Looks jerky when he throws the ball.  That's common amongst pitchers!  They all look like jerks mid-pitch.  Anyway what else is going on.  Look if God didn't want me to eat so many Mini Animal Cancer Crackers he wouldn't have made them so delicious and easy to snack upon.  So basically God wants me to lose slightly less weight today than I do on normal days.  DAMNIT.  By vaguely signing up with God I MADE A DEAL WITH THE DEVIL.  Hmm.  Sounds like an interesting theological debate there.  I'll get started on preparing for the debate tomorrow.  First thing I need to do is pick a side.  I can't pick a side without preliminary research.  Then I pick a side.  Then POSTlimainary research.  I have concrete plans on how to live my life is the point.
     Hey great what else.  I dunno.  The rest of today can't be that bad.  Already got most of my Omicron Worrying out of the way.  The Mets Got Their Man.  Max Scherzer Got Paid.  I got my Amazon Fresh Delivery.  EVERYBODY WINS.  Except about that Omicron stuff.  Well per this paragraph I AM Winning re: Omicron.  Not worrying about it much more for the rest of the day!  Chalk that up AS A WIN for today at least.  Amazing!  Oh, Mic Ron.  Some guy named Ron wants to be put on a vocal amplification system.  And we are supporting it.  Is that something?  I guess it depends on the Ron. Omicron has gotta be SOMETHING.  It's more interesting a word than Delta.  I think that's throwing people for a loop.  Delta is a fine word and has some interesting connotations but OMICRON is a real jolt to the system.  WHAT THE HELL IS THAT WORD ALL ABOUT.  What the Hell am I talking all about.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Amazing.  I think part of the reason I think Scherzer looks like a jerk is he LOOKS like a slightly older man.  He's 37!  He looks closer to 40 than to 25 lets put it that way.  I WANT HIM TO PERFORM LIKE A YOUTH PLAYER.  But sure AS A PERSON being looking like you're 40 isn't inherently bad.  So I can't really fault him there.  Besides that's his body his choice.  He wants to look like an old man HIS BUSINESS NOT MINE.  Well now that he signed with the team I Root For it kind of IS my business.  I PAY HIS SALARY.  I watch parts of Mets games and parts of those viewings are advertisements.  Thus I'M PUTTING MY MONEY IN HIS POCKET.  GET IT TOGETHER.  Huh.  What else is going on.  I'm gonna be honest-- after years of not having it-- I can DEFINITELY taste the Wild Cherry part of Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi.  And I'm gonna be honest-- I have absolutely no motive not to be-- DELICIOUS AND PRACTICAL.
     Last paragraph of the day.  I'm worried there won't be enough focus on Other Bands in the Beatles documentary.  In the first seven minutes VERY little attention paid to other bands at all.  Doesn't seem fair!  What else is going on.  I'm gonna be honest, I don't know how to spell documentry.  Comes up all the time for some reason.  It rings a bell that every spell check I do every day I'm ALWAYS having to correct documentry.  Not sure why I don't know how to spell a relatively simple word.  Also don't know why that word comes up 4 times every day.  Watch a lot of documentaries I guess.  I don't really!  No more than your average dumb guy who watches TV all day.  Oh well that's life I guess.  Hey great that's the entry for today.  I'll be back tomorrow with more dumb stuff!

-2:00 P.M.

Sunday, November 28, 2021 

Take A Look At This

    Hey friends!  What's going on.  Some bad news on my end.  Not having as much success chewing less gum than I would have hoped!  I blame getting Spearmint for first time in months.  Too exciting!  I can't get enough of this stuff!  The good news is who cares the situation will resolve itself one way or another.  I know it doesn't feel that way but I do have bigger problems than how much gum I am chewing.  Gum is small!  Just look at it.  Tiny little thing.  Sure if you make a ball of gum every week of all he gum I chewed throughout the week that'd be a big ball.  How big?  Not sure!  Maybe I gotta actually do it to properly visualize it!  I'll get started on that I guess later today.  GREAT now I have something to do!  Wonderful.  What else is going on in the wide world of sports that will resolve itself in one more sentence.  Because that's all the space I have left in this paragraph!  Hmm.
     Yeah.  Today is Sunday!  Gonna shave today.  No two ways about it.  Gotta do it!  FINE LETS GET INTO SOME GOOD STUFF.  What you didn't like me forming big balls of gum?  How can we like it.  NONE OF US can properly imagine how big a weekly gum ball would be.  Off the top of my head maybe two thirds the size of a baseball?  Maybe slightly bigger?  Or slightly smaller?  Or significantly smaller?  I don't think it'd be significantly bigger!  WOW THIS BLED INTO A WHOLE NEW PARAGRAPH.  WHAT LUCK WE HAVE.  Anyway looking forward to getting started on Beatles Footage Documentary.  I get the sense that it LOOKS like more recent video as opposed to grainy black and white silent film video from the late 1960's.  COOL.  They're just like me.  They look the same on TV!  Sure.  Arm still hurts a bit where they shot it.  However I'm starting to suspect it hurts because that's where I'm putting pressure on when I'm doing push-ups.  HMM.
     Hey by the end of Recent Walk it was snowing tiny specks!  OF SNOW PRESUMABLY.  Eskimos have 37 words for snow.  And at least 2 words for Eskimo!  They got Eskimo and Inuit.  Gotta imagine EVEN MORE.  What else is going on.  Will correct my No Coke Zero situation today or tomorrow.  Not sure HOW but it will be done.  Maybe get Diet Pepsi this time around as a treat to mix things up.  Been a while Since Pepsi!  Anyway my brother was over most of the day yesterday.  Good to see him.  Nice company!  Makes me feel like I'd like to be in the company of other people more often.  Maybe not every day.  Once or twice a week seems about right.  Anyway.  I've noticed that on cans and bottles and packaging diet sodas always make a big deal to say ZERO SUGAR.  I feel like they USED to say ZERO CALORIES.  I guess now they wanna highlight the sugar and not the calories.  Interesting Story.  VERY interesting.
     Anyway.  Not a fan of how half of diet sodas have no caffeine.  LOOK what's wrong with caffeine.  I'd like caffeine all things being equal!  Not sure why I feel that way.  I just feel like Hey Anything Bonus Is Better.  Caffeine couldn't hurt!  SURE IT CAN.  Oh well what can ya do.  OH NO KAMALA HARRIS BOUGHT A POT.  I CARE A LOT ABOUT THIS STORY.  I think it should be front page news ALL THE TIME EVERYWHERE.  Whether you're Pro-Kamala Harris buying a pot or Anti, it doesn't matter.  It's a good scholarly debate and I think we as a country SHOULD be having that conversation at this moment in American history.  Anyway.  Has she had to answer for what she might use the pot for yet?  Let's get her on the record saying why she needs a pot and what she'll make with it!  That's INTEGRAL to this situation.
    What else is going on.  I think Joe Biden should buy a pot in solidarity.  Show everyone he stands with his Vice President.  Anyway.  Sunday today.  I can, "Dig," that!  Solid three weeks since we changed the clocks.  Wow!  Time flies by.  Well it flew by roughly an hour quicker than usual.  So that's relatively flying by all things considered.  What do I got in store for the rest of the day.  I don't think I'm in the middle of any TV Series To Watch And Remember right now.  Gonna have to start one at some point.  TV isn't gonna watch itself!  It probably could though.  I could see getting 2 TVs and setting them up facing each other and then having one on for 8 hours and then turning it off and then turning the other one on.  So they watch each other.  Can't have em both on at the same time.  They'd be busy playing themselves and not paying attention to the other one.  Coffee time!
    Anyway.  Before arm started hurting, I think I was doing too much push-ups/shit-ups.  Think I'm gonna cut it by a third.  Do roughly 2/3rds of what I was up to for a couple of weeks.  YEAH.  GOOD STUFF.  Got coffee going.  Hmm.  I'm a little concerned that The Beatles: Get Back will ACTUALLY GET US BACK to then and create a time loop that we are unable to get out of!  UNABLE TO GET OUT OF?  THAT'S NO GOOD.  A time loop we are able to get out of is okay!  Perhaps even pleasant!  But I INSIST we be able to get out of it before I can recommend participating in a time loop.  Anyway.  I wonder what kind of facial hair they got going on in this DocuSeries.  My best guess?  SOME BUT NOT ALL.  Hmm.  One of the scrubs I was complaining about that The Mets signed was on the freakin' All Star Team last year.  One of the two of them at least.  YEAH BUT I DON'T TRUST IT.  Seems like a scam.  He had a decent year just to trick the Mets into signing him.  Obviously.
     Seventh paragraph!  Wonderful.  Maybe my Mom's right.  Maybe I do need t-shirts.  And if I do need t-shirts, she's probably also right about I need them to advertise bands I like.  And/or want to PRETEND I like.  I don't know what to think to be honest.  I don't think I have a Beatles T-Shirt.  Wait yes I do.  It's the one t-shirt I made myself.  Designed it on some T-Shirt Website Enterprise back in 2007.  Just says All You Need Is Love.  Figure they could easily sue me if they caught onto this situation but so far I've received no legal threats or anything!  No threats of any kind!  So I'm sitting pretty is the point.  Also I'm estimating I should be roughly done dieting by the end of the year!  Maybe do some Fine Tuning the first 2 or 3 months of the next year.  Lose a bonus 1 or 2 pounds.  But mostly done by the end of the year I hope and partly think!
     YEAH.  That's one month.  I can do this for one more month.  What's a month in the end.  Four weeks plus a couple of days usually.   Yep that checks out!  Wonderful.  Still not sure how concerned about New Covid I should be.  My guess is let it play out.  Doesn't ultimately matter how worried I am right now.  I'm gonna take the same precautions either way.  So I'll wait and see I guess.  Eighth paragraph.  Not sure how I'm ever gonna get to the Ninth paragraph.  Guess I'll just have to wait and see.  Hmm.  I'd watch Beatles DocuSeries in theaters if there was no pandemic.  If it was just a regular life and they were playing this sucker in the theater I'd go watch it.  Wouldn't it be seven hours long.  I guess.  They'd have to figure out what to do with that.  But either way OH So THAT'S how I ended up getting to the Ninth paragraph.  INTERESTING.
     Wonderful.  Anyway.  I assume the meaning of the title of the song Get Back was in the spirit of GET BACK I'VE GOT A GUN AND I'M NOT AFRAID TO USE IT.  Why would you be afraid to use a gun.  You're gonna be okay!  Other people should be afraid you'll use the gun.  Yeah sure whatever.  Also are conservatives afraid Kamala Harris will use Pot as a weapon?  I feel like I've seen women in kitchens hit their husbands over the head with pots and there's an epidemic of domestic violence like that.  Not sure where I'm getting that from.  Possibly black and white sitcoms.  Possibly nowhere.  I've narrowed it down to those two places.  Anyway what else is going on.  Kind of interesting in going back out in the snow.  If it's still snowing VERY LIGHTLY Snow Specks.  That's fun.  If it's more snow that's no fun.  If it's less snow that's kind of fun?
     Last paragraph of the act!  There's an article on ESPN / MLB about The Mets signing players lately but it's behind a paywall!  What the HELL.  I wanna read that article.  How hard is it to just make that one article available to everyone.  EASY.  Most of your articles are free.  Why not that one.  WHAT'S THE PROBLEM HERE.  Also the headline seems to imply they're impressed with what The Mets did.  WOW GOOD NEWS?  I GOTTA READ THAT.  Somebody Sponsor Me an ESPN Insider subscription.  Somethin' like that.  This Starling Star Dude is gonna steal a lot of bases.  He's gonna be on first base for one reason or another and then more often than you'd expected at first he's gonna be like ya know what I'd rather be on second base and then HE MAKES THAT HAPPEN.  I can't wait to see that play out TWENTY FIVE OR THIRTY OR MORE TIMES over the course of the year.  Anyway hey Act One is over.  I'll be back in a little bit!

Are You Still There

    For some reason when I was talking about making a big ball of gum every week I was 50% thinking yeah I could do that I guess.  I shouldn't take myself so seriously.  At 50% seriously.  Is the glass Half Serious or Half Unserious.  Half Unserious that's the point I'm trying to make.  Oh Okay.  Anyway hey time for some more paragraphs.  How many times have I bragged about making a t-shirt.  Thirty times?  A HUNDRED TIMES?  The point is I'm a creative genius.  I took a standard shirt.  Made the color BLACK.  Then put ONE LINE OF TEXT on the Upper Part Of It.  A MASTERPIECE.  Wonderful.  No snow on 2nd walk just now.  Great!  Who cares.  Not me.  Also in the 37 words for Snow that the Inuits have is one of them No Snow.  Or maybe even SEVERAL of them.  Four of the words invoking the concept of Snow could generally be meant to mean There's No Snow.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Maybe later.
     Cool!  Inuits have 37 words for Snow but not one word for Love.  How sad.  What else is going on.  Gotta figure out a way to live a semi-productive life without dieting.  My best guess is tricking myself into knowing how to make music again and doing that combined with entrying.  Those things TOGETHER combine to form a semi-productive life.  It's gonna be TOUGH.  But if I could figure it out HEY SEMI PRODUCTIVE LIFE I CAN DIG THAT REAL WELL.  Entry in the morning.  Music in the evening.  Absolutely Nothing in the day.  Sounds like a routine!  I like routines.  Good, bad, whatever, doesn't matter!  If it's good enough that it's settled into a routine I'm having fun with it.  Also real wild card is if I can buy legalized marijuana-- and enjoy it-- and smoke that in the eveninings while working on music.  WILD CARDS?  I LOVE WILD CARDS.  They may turn out to be GOOD.  The point is People have 37 different words for marijuana but no one seems to care about that.  It's a scam!
     Anyway.  I think we kind of generously imagine the premise of 37 words for snow is that each word represents a distinct kind of snow or some special feature or something.  Maybe they're all just bland synononmys that mean exactly the same thing.  Seems like a bit of let down.  I wanted there to literally be 37 different kinds of snow we're talkin' about!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also kind of imagined Inuits talking about snow ALL THE TIME.  If you had 37 words for something you'd be using those words in every conversation.  Maybe they rarely use any of these words.  They're THERE but Inuits have better things to have conversations about.  Have you heard about the vice president BUYING A POT?  Everyone knows A Pot is a gateway to Spaghetti!  SOUNDS RISKY.  That sort of thing.  Do Inuits know about spaghetti?  THEY DO NOW.  Huh?  Oh okay great.
    I'm not proud of it but I think I have some sort of inherent cultural bias against Inuits.  In the background I'm kind of like well I wouldn't live there in the snow.  Seems kind of dumb.  They probably should find somewhere easier to live.  But they know what they're doing!  I should be more welcoming of different cultural lifestyles and whatnot.  HEY let's see what the National Food Day Of The Day is.  NATIONAL FRENCH TOAST DAY?!?!!  First National Food Day I'm 100% on board with.  I love me some Freedom Toast.  Sign me up for some of that!  If I didn't already have meals or today I'd be like Hey I want that RIGHT NOW.  But I do.  So I guess I have to settle for being like Hey I want that MAYBE IN A FEW DAYS.  The point is I forget.  My favorite part of French Toast is the part where you eat it.  Making it or watching it be made and then looking at the final product is fun.  Bu eating it is where I get my kicks!
     Last paragraph of the act.  Wonderful.  Is it just me or do I not know who Stephen Sondheim is.  Hmm.  Strange way to phrase that sentence.  Works for me!  What else is going on.  Too ka shower yesterday to impress my brother.  I didn't want him thinking I'm some sort of BATH Guy.  I'm a SHOWER Guy.  As far as he knows.  You and I both know that the truth lies in the middle but closer to being a Bath Guy.  Sadaam Hussein was a Ba'ath Guy.  Not great company to be in!  Then again what did he really ever do to anybody.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Probably Lots Of Negative Things.  What else is going on.  Actually.  Maybe take a shower again today.  I had a positive experience yesterday!  And I WANT to be a shower guy.  That's my main aspiration in life.  That and Continuing Not Dying.  Whatever I'll be back in a little bit.

I Hope There's Somebody

    Look maybe Just Living is productive enough a life.  Maybe it isn't!  Gonna have to look into that.  The point is my Mom made coffee this morning and there's just enough so that my second cup is about 60% full.  GONNA SETTLE FOR THAT.  Rather than make more.  And I'm having it now rather than saving it!  Get of my back about it and whatnot.  Also new Snapple I got was BACK TO LEMON.  So let's see what the Lemon Iced Tea Patriotism Fact Of The Day Is.  Baby Bunnies are called kittens.  BEEN THERE DONE THAT.  NEXT.  Oh I gotta drink this snapple before I can go to the next one.  NEXT.  What else is going on.  Now that I finished my Root Beer Cans I have no savory soda.  Some Diet Dr Pepper but I can't drink that every other soda drink because it's for my Mom!  Gonna have to wait a couple of days before I re-up with Amazon Fresh.  DAMNIT.
    I have 37 different words for DAMNIT.  We all do!  Pretty common words in all of our lexicons.  What else is going on.  Maybe take a walk while my Dad is taking his walk from now on.  Mom turns out to be okay with it!  For months we were operating under the premise she wanted one of us home at all times.  Turns out that might have been the case on a temporary basis and the restriction was just never explicitly lifted!  WHAT JOY MY LIFE IS BETTER NOW.  Except for worrying about if my Mom falls down the stairs or something while neither of us are there.  WHAT ARE THE ODDS THOUGH.  One in ten!  NEVER GONNA HAPPEN.  What else is going on.  Also if she falls down the stairs what can I do but offer moral support.  Help her back up.  I have enough Strength Now to do it.  BEEN WORKING OUT.  Also I can call the hospital.  I KNOW THEIR NUMBER IT'S THE SAME AS OTHER EMERGENCY NUMBERS PER MY UNDERSTANDING.  The point is I could help a lot!  Good for me.
     Third paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Based on Politician Tweets I get the sense the Channukah has started or is starting imminently.  ALRIGHT.  Do I have a lighter in my room somewhere.  Off the top of my head that's all I can think to do to celebrate it.  Play with a lighter.  Get some GELT.  I'd eat me some gelt.  I'd cheat on my diet It's CHANNUKAH let's go crazy.  What else is going on.  Also there's several accepted spellings of Channukah and then there's several spellings I'M on board with that I don't think anyone else is.  Channukah.  That's how I'm spelling it.  Microsoft Front Page doesn't accept it.  Maybe the internet does.  Let's look up that spelling on the internet.  Nope.  Internet doesn't accept that exact spelling.  It's MY BODY MY CHOICE.  I say Channukah.  GOOD FOR ME.
     Penultimate paragraph of the day.  What's a good Savory entertainment choice I can watch during the day time today.  Not a citrus flavor or something.  Just your standard cola-esque TV/Film Choice.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into what that means before I can look into what my options are based on that criteria.  Ya know what?  If I had a choice?  Go back to Raspberry next week.  Wonderful.  Snapple I mean.  Should have been more clear about that.  Oh well too late now.  What else.  Maybe Mets Owner Steve Cohen was right to tweet that he didn't like the way a players agent was acting.  My first impression was Cohen is just being a child.  He didn't get to sign the player he wanted and now he's throwing a tantrum.  Maybe In Baseball that agent is KNOWN for being a jerk.  And everyone In Baseball is like YEAH HE'S SAYING WHAT WE'RE ALL SCARED TO SAY.  Not impossible it's the case.  VERY UNLIKELY SURE.
     Last paragraph of the day.  Whattado with the rest of the day.  No colas to drink IN REAL LIFE.  No cola-esque TV/Film to Consume off the top of my head!  Ugh.  This is gonna be a chore.  The point is I still got Same Routine As Usual for at least another month.  So I got some time to work out the kinks of what the next thing I can do will be.  I don't know HOW I'll work out the kinks.  Been trying to work out some kinks about it today and yesterday and I'm still overwhelmed by Kinks.  That's life I guess.  Also I assume the crux of The Beatles: Get Back is like THE KINKS ARE MAKING US LOOK BAD SOMEHOW.  WE MUST MAKE THIS ALBUM TO SHOW UP THE KINKS OR SOMETHING.  As good a thing as any to assume.  I could make more coffee later.  That's Savory.  Something to think about.  Thought about it.  Probably not gonna do it.  DAMNIT I had something to think about and I just blew through it.  Back to Nothing To Think About!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:18 P.M.

Saturday, November 27, 2021 

Hey You're Reading This Great

    Hello friends.  Good chance Act I will be interrupted by Super Market delivery.  We'll just have to wait and see.  Well if we're busy waiting and seeing OF COURSE it will be interrupted.  I need to GET IT DONE if I wanna avoid being interrupted.  Hmm.  Probably made that point 3-6 times in the past when talking about being interrupted by Super Market Deliveries.  Sounds like the kind of thing I'd say every week!  Anyway, my brother is coming over this late morning.  Entry might also be interrupted by that!  Gotta be a congenial host and entertain him for part of the time.  That's how I roll!  Also haven't just had A ROLL in 20 years.  Used to just eat Kaiser Rolls or something as a snack.  Then, when I got older, moved on to Challah Rolls.  The point is yes we all know rolls are delicious for sandwiches but have you heard the good news about just eating rolls?
     Whatever.  Who cares!  Not me!  But it gets us CLOSER to writing/reading something we do care about.  Everyone knows what a Kaiser Roll is.  As much as I do.  Probably.  If not lemme psychically translate an image of it to you... NOW.  OR just go to google and google image it.  That sounds easier.  I haven't quite cracked how to psychically translate images ACROSS TIME yet.  If you were literally reading this as I was writing it, no problem!  Can't do it across time!  What am I some sort of SUPER man?  Anyway.  Upcoming snapple for the week is back to lemon.  Let's have a Raspberry right now!  ALSO this will lead to Raspberry Patriotism Day Fact Of The Patriotism Day.  Which will be a SOLID way to end this paragraph.  Bamboo makes up 99% of a panda's diet.  I'm not surprised about that.  Pandas love bamboo.  You ain't telling me anything new with that!  Are humans allowed to eat Bamboo.  Or do we have to save it all for pandas.  Also what is bamboo.
    I think it's like branches of trees?  Maybe just sticks?  DELICIOUS.  And nutritious!  What else is going on.  My mom is ordering me a new hat.  Ya know.  Like a winter hat.  Skull cap.  Beanie hat.  All that stuff combined makes you realize what I am actually talking about.  Either way I'm fine with it as long as it's not too tight or too loose.  That's where I draw some line!  Hey the Mets made THREE signings yesterday.  Two bench players that are being paid over 10 million dollars a season each!  One GOOD player that is worth being pumped up about!  I think their motivation for signing bench players and over paying them was just to be like SEE WE CAN SIGN PLAYERS.  PLAYERS STILL LOVE THE METS.  LOOK AT ALL THESE PLAYERS WE'RE GETTING.  Makes sense to me!  The more the merrier.  Except if it's the Grinch.  He stole Christmas!  Tried to at least.  I forget if he was ultimately successful.  Never was invested in the story!  I don't believe in Christmas!
     Yeah!  What I wanna know is what's the other 1% of Panda Diet.  My guess?  Pork Rinds.  Someone's sneaking in these pandas American Pork Rinds.  Also not enough 1990's movies about kids who are friends with pandas.  We get other animals where kids and/or adults are friends with.  No pandas off the top of my head!  Pandas are too dangerous.  They'll Maul Ya!  Just like any other bear!  I think we assume that hey they LOOK cuter than other bears they must ACT cuter, too!  No!  They're just as much bear as anyone else, right?  Gotta be!  Unless they've been bred over thousands of years to Act Cute.  In which case WELL DONE.  I'M CONCERNED what this new GOOD Mets Signing will do the line-up construction.  It's a problem!  Someone's gonna get the short straw and have to be in the back-er part of the lineup compared to where they should be!  OH NO I'M SCARED HOLD ME.
     I guess if The Mets don't sign any more good players they can make it work.  So they have that motivation I guess.  Anyway.  Website wouldn't load for about an hour and a half after I tried to publish it yesterday.  Dunno what the problem was exactly.  It was fixed, though!  Maybe too much traffic.  You AND THE OTHER GUY who reads this were all trying to load up the website at once and it couldn't handle it!  TAKE TURNS how hard is that.  Figure it out amongst yourselves.  Seems like the good player the Mets got was at too good a price.  Makes me think he's actually not that good!  Oh no.  OH RIGHT now I know the other 1% of Panda's Diet.  Humans!  They're bears they'll eat ya without thinking twice.  They're bears they don't think at all.  If you can't think once you certainly can't think twice.  Coffee time!
     Anyway.  Got an update on Super Market delivery and it might be on the later side of things.  DAMNIT.  Gonna have to waste an hour or two just doin' NOTHIN.  I got THINGS to do in the morning.  There's THIS.  There's THAT.  There's ENTERTAINING GUESTS.  Oh well that's life.  Maybe I could take 30 minute Do Nothing Break and then write Act II.  I DUNNO.  Sounds kind of RISKY.  Not sure if I'd be comfortable doing that.  Not sure if I'm comfortable doing ANYTHING.  I'm pretty comfortable most of the time.  Probably.  Anyway cans of soda let me comfortably last until re-upping today with Super Market.  What's Going On Though That's Relevant to THE PEOPLE.  You nice people wanna read something relevant to you!  Starling Marte is The Good Guy the Mets signed.  He's a STAR.  Says so in his name.  Also MARTE.  Not sure what that's all about but ya know what I THINK I LIKE IT.  HE STEALS BASES?  HOW EXCITING.  Some guy RUNNING FAST every now and then.  From base to base!  SIGN ME UP FOR WATCHING THAT.
     Wonderful.  On THE INTERNET they're implying that the deal Starling Marte got was fair and possibly even a slight overpay.  NOT FROM WHERE I SIT.  Which is IN MY HOUSE.  That's where I do ALMOST ALL of my sitting.  Get off my back about where and when I sit okay!  That's the point I was trying to make as far as I can remember.  HEY Haven't been scared of new Covid Variant yet today.  Probably could do that during Potential Nothin-To-Do-Break after Act and before Super Market Delivery.  Sounds fun AND productive.  I feel like I've probably gotten small pieces of Bamboo in some Chinese Take Out.  And immediately quarantined them to throw them out because they look weird.  Lemme LTURQ.  Hmm.  Not sure if I ever actually came across Bamboo Shoots!  Definitely SEEN 'em in Menu Descriptions of meals.  I may have successfully avoided them up till now!
     Sure.  Great.  Whatever!  How many pandas are there.  I feel like they're endangered.  Probably because Not Enough Bamboo.  Lemme LTURQ.  World Wild Life Foundation said there's 1,864 pandas as of 2020.  That's not good but not TERRIBLE.  They have SOME wiggle room to work with.  But still Definitely Not Good.  Oh well.  Ya get what ya deserve!  Hmm.  I'm assuming Humans are responsible for killing off the pandas.  But HOW.  My guess is destroying their habitats.  Lemme LTURQ.  YEP HABITAT DESTRUCTION.  Just as I suspected.  Oh well what can ya do.  They live on the other side of the world from me.  Maybe if they were closer I'd help them out but they're way too far away for me to personally do anything!  Anyway.  Seems like if we're making an animal extinct it should At LEAST be because we're eating all of them.  That's my opinion at least.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Small chance I DO take a short break and then start writing Act II before Super Market delivery gets here.  Probably won't but it might feel right when the time comes!  LOOK MARTE IS A DEAL because HE STEALS BASES.  It might not be Statistically Analytically as valuable as other aspects of the game but I LIKE WATCHING THEM PEOPLE STEAL BASES.  It's all the fun of RUNNING combined with all the fun of STEALING THINGS.  Gets me off boy does it.  Anyway what else is going on.  HEY they updated Super Market Delivery Time Estimate so it's a little bit sooner.  GREAT.  A little bit sooner?  That's A WHOLE LOTTA BETTER.  Cool.  Anyway.  Vaccine side effect wise we're down to just a little bit sore where they shot me.  Cool.
     Last paragraph for now!  My Mom let me take her bottle of PEPSID into my room!  Totally half full.  Probably around 20 Pepsids in there!  AMAZING.  Now I don't need to let everyone know when and where I'm taking Pepsids.  It's PRIVATE now as it should be.  My body my business!  Still got The Beatles Footage Documentary Experience to watch.  I'm saving it for when I'll REALLY appreciate it.  Some Time In The Near Future.  Sounds good to me.  It'd help if I knew who the protagonist was going into it.  I guess I'll just have to find out like the rest of you by watching it.  Anyway.  Also by the end are we rooting for the Beatles to break up, too?  Gotta imagine that'd be a nice twist surprise ending.  The point is I'll be back in a little bit.

A Lot Of Good That Does Me

    Hey!  Took a 20 minute break.  Now they pushed back Super Market Delivery Estimate so that it's not supposed to be here for another half hour or an hour.  So I figured I'll sneak in an Act II.  And if I don't finish it Great I'll finish it afterwards.  So the point is let's talk about it what's going on in the wide world of sports.  I noticed the player I think is Great, Starling Marte, doesn't play full seasons all the time?  Maybe he's injured every year?  That's why he might have diminished value.  If you're injured you're not stealing bases.  That's Rule 1 of Baseball.  Also I got some Diet Dr Pepper I was saving for my Mom.  That's Rule 2 of Baseball.  Hmm that's a surprise.  I don't make the Rules I just recite them.  Some of them.  Those are the only Rules of Baseball I know off the top of my head.
     Cool!  Maybe some players like the Mets Owner acting like a dummy on Twitter and presumably in real life.  HEY he's a jerk.  I LIKE jerks.  This kind of jerk at least.  This kind of jerk is a jerk I can do business with!  That's what I'm banking on at least.  Anyway.  Mets signing high priced utility players last night, too!  I get the sense that the new GM was like HEY I'M A GM NOW!  CHECK ME OUT I'M SIGNING PLAYERS LIKE A REAL GM.  I'M A BIG BOY GM.  The point is I project Jerkiness onto everybody I see!  Maybe cause everyone I see is a jerk.  Ever think of that.  No but I am now!  And BOY AM I.  If you're not a jerk WHAT ARE YOU DOING FOR THE PANDAS.  Oh you're doing nothing for the pandas?  JERK.  That includes me.  I'm raising Panda Awareness.  That's something for the pandas.  UN-JERKED.
     Yeah.  I like how a lot of Chinese Restaurants have the word Panda in them.  Isn't that the standard Chinese Chain at Malls.  Panda Express.  They're really leaning into Something with the Pandas and I don't know what it is exactly but I do know I Don't Think I Like It.  Maybe I do like it what do I know.  Anyway.  I like how baseball players are on twitter.  And then the Mets sign a player and they're like I'm going to The Mets! and I'm like WOW you're excited now I'M excited.  This is great fun!  Also my impression is ALL THREE of the new Mets are Straight Up Guys.  No one has said so explicitly but I've seen no evidence to the contrary as of yet.  So we got that going for us!  The point is starting this Act II has already justified itself.  Made it deep enough that it was worth it!  Wonderful.
    Maybe not worth it for you.  Not sure I said anything worthwhile.  Off the top of my head Wondering Why Chinese Food leans into talking about Pandas.  That's an interesting think-em-up.  Oh.  The 2 main rules of Baseball.  Can't steal bases while you're injured and gotta save enough diet dr pepper for your mother.  That's... not funny or interesting.  But it WAS said.  By ME!  Sounds good to me.  What nationality is Starling Marte.  My best guess?  Hmm I dunno.  I have no idea.  Let's LTURQ. FUCK HE'S DOMINICAN.  I was gonna guess Dominican!  But I was like look maybe it's 15% chance he's Dominican.  It's my first guess but I'd still probably be wrong.  Now I look like an idiot SEVERAL TIMES OVER.  I didn't guess it, I THOUGHT OF IT but didn't guess it, I TALKED ABOUT IT TOO MUCH that people don't care, and all that combined makes me a compounded idiot.  The point is great Dominican Republic love it.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Nice thing about writing Act II now is I only have to write Act III later.  No Other Act II needs to be written at all!  Fascinating.  Rule 3 of Baseball-- make your best guess of what country baseball players originally hail from known even if the odds are you're wrong.  That should really be Rule 1.  So far that's the most important rule I've talked about.  What else is going on.  Might take one less walk today to entertain brother.  Depends on what kind of circumstances develop while he's here!  Not sure what it's gonna be like exactly.  Anyway I'm back doing push-ups and sit-ups more or less at will.  Still A BIT of pain where they shot me in Right Arm but manageable.  Gotta play through the pain!  I feel like commercials have told me to do that.  Sounds about right to me.  Anyway I'll be back soon presumably.

Sorry Let Me Start Over

    Look was I a little too dismissive of the two Mets signings that weren't Starling Marte of Dominican Republic?  YES!  They could easily be solid major league regulars.  But they can also easily be busts!  Let's pay them 12 million dollars a year to find out.  Sounds fair.  IT IS FAIR.  That's what I said.  OH RIGHT.  Anyway Super Market delivery came just as my brother came.  They forgot the Coke Zero!  Both the Super Market and My Brother.  NEITHER brang me my precious Coke Zero.  Gonna have to figure out how to deal with that problem.  LATER DOWN THE ROAD.  I'm okay for first half of the week!  Anyway got coffee going on now.  Because that's how things work.  Gonna shower when this is over.  That's also how things work!  What else is how things work.  Hmm.  Brother didn't seem so concerned about New Variant of Covid.  And he was the one who got Me And Mine concerned about Covid-19 at the start last year.  So I VALUE his first impressions.  Also IT'S WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR.  So I value it TEN TIMES MORE.
    Yeah!  Looks like most likely result of not getting Coke Zeroes is to get bonus cans of soda from Amazon Fresh again.  Wait.  No.  Let Me Try That again.  Amazon Fresh.  Yeah I like that better.  Glad we settled that.  Hmm maybe I should learn the names of the new Mets.  They might both be regulars in LINE UP.  One of them is an Escobar.  The other one is a Canha.  That much I know.  Sounds good.  Sounds real good now that I think about it.  Then again maybe over the last year and a half My Brother Just Stopped Caring To Worry About Things.  Not so much that we're safer now but that he's given up giving a shit.  Sounds good.  Sounds real good.  I could see that working out for him really well.  Not sure what a Cahna is.  Better LTURQ.  It's a white guy.  Saw his picture before I could see any written details about him.  Some white guy!  I guess I don't have a problem with that.
     Third paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  I'll entertain my brother a little bit later.  He's gonna be here for a few hours.  Might cut one walk from Midday out to make room.  I can do that!  Whose gonna stop me YOU?  Hmm.  Maybe you should try.  You could be looking out for my best interests in trying to stop me.  You're not just trying to make things hard for me, you want me to take that walk because YOU CARE.  In which case THANK YOU but I'm gonna go with my own gut on this one!  Hmm.  My brother complimented me on my appearance!  FINALLY SOME VALIDATION.  I've been waiting FOREVER to be complimented.  He complimented my weight.  My GREAT SHIRT.  My haircut.  All the key points he Should Have Noticed he did.  So apparently I'm doing something right!  Or my brother was being polite.  Either way I WIN.
     Penultimate paragraph.  What else is going on.  We're solidly into the weekend.  It's Saturday!  GET REAL it was the weekend yesterday.  Yeah but for me weekend doesn't start until I get Super Market Delivery Order.  Which is usually Friday mornings but this time was Saturday.  MY WEEKEND has just begun!  Does that mean I get Monday too as part of my weekend.  SURE WHY NOT.  There's no RULES.  I can call anything my weekend!  Ugh.  Looks like I have until March to get my new phone as opposed to The Changing Of The Years.  Great!  Another couple of months I can Not Do Something.  Now my life is really getting better for the better!  Wonderful.  My Mom asked me who Peter Jackson was and I told her he directed Lord of The Rings and Epic Movies like that.  Because I didn't know how to tell her he directed The Frighteners. 
     Last paragraph!  It's gonna be a good one.  Probably not.  That's accurate too!  Thinking about experimenting with New Meal Times once I'm done dieting.  Instead of lunch/dinner at 4:30/9:30 push 'em back 2 hours.  2:30/7:30.  More NORMAL.  Maybe more HEALTHY.  And I can have a decent sized snack at around 9:30 instead so I get something out of the deal that way too.  It's good to have THOUGHTS and PLANS.  Probably.  If your intent overall is For Good.  If you're planning something evil or bad for people your thoughts and plans are no good.  I'M AGAINST YOUR WHOLE DEAL HERE.  Huh.  Told you this paragraph probably wouldn't be good!  So I was accurate if nothing else.  Also-- Nothing Else.  Hey the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow presumably.

-1:08 P.M.

Friday, November 26, 2021 

You Actually Want To Read This

    Hey!  Took a day off yesterday.  80% because I was feeling under the weather due to vaccine, and 20% because it was Thanksgiving and it felt appropriate to take the day off.  Anyway what's new.  NEW COVID STRAIN?  What the Hell?  Why is that happening.  Nobody wants it to happen.  Doesn't add up!  Must be some people out there who want it to happen and they're just keeping quiet.  Anyway if we're all suddenly not vaccined that will make all of our lives worse again.  That's MY hot take.  Also I was joking with it being suspicious people who want New Covid being the reason.  The real reason is covid itself.  But I don't get THAT either.  Doesn't it know nobody wants it?  It's not gonna win any new friends by becoming a new irresistible strain.  We're just gonna like it less!  NOBODY WINS in this scenario.  Except for FAUCI.  HE'S LIVING LARGE.
     What else is going on.  Maybe if I talk about it in Introductory Paragraph it won't happen.  Don't see why that would be the case.  Couldn't hurt.  Maybe it could.  If it could help there's roughly an equal chance it could hurt.  Luckily PROBABLY won't have any impact one way or another.  Anyway enjoying some cans of soda.  Mainly the beverage contained within the cans.  Anyway if you check the ESPN / MLB homepage there's still no updates on New Covid Strain being vaccine resistant so that's good news so far.  Once it becomes too big a deal that it's on the ESPN / MLB page we know it's time to worry.  Until then We're Okay!  Anyway.  What did I do with Vacation Day yesterday.  Watched Expendables II and III!  NOT GREAT MOVIES.  Also if they're so expendable how come none of them ever die.  That doesn't line up with the definition of Expendable that I assume is correct!  Hey great what else.
    Hey I'm an idiot.  I've been reading New Variant is from South Africa and until just now I was like okay a country in the southern part of Africa I gotcha.  It took me until JUST NOW to be like OH RIGHT SOUTH AFRICA IS A COUNTRY.  It's from THE COUNTRY of South Africa.  Whatta idiot.  Maybe there'll be a middle area where vaccines are like 70% effective.  HMM THAT'S INTERESTING.  Could be less effective but effective enough I personally won't switch up lifestyle that much from now.  The point is WHAT WOULD NELSON MANDELA SAY.  Probably would be against it.  That's my first guess.  Doesn't seem like one of those suspicious people who would be for it.  But then again I never met the man what do I know.  Don't even know if he is a man.  Never checked!  Or ASKED HIM.  That's UP TO HIM not his genitalia.  Point is Nelson Mandela won't stand for this.
    Of course he's a man.  It's right in his name.  MAN-DELLA.  Then again in languages words that end in, "A," are feminine.  So we still don't know for sure.  What else is going on.  I figure we got a good week or two before Southern Africa variant makes its way to my neighborhood.  TIME TO LIVE LARGE.  Really make the most of the time I have left with current lifestyle.  Hmm.  Guess that just means walking all day and ordering from diners all day.  That's mostly what I've been getting out of life that I wasn't during Total Quarantine.  Amazing.  Maybe variant is here and we don't know it.  DAMNIT.  Then again there's that adage what you don't know can't hurt you.  So there's that.  I may have made up that adage.  Someone's gotta make up adages.  Why not me?  I could make up some adages if I really wanted to try.  Also I think that's 90% a real adage.  Someone's gotta slightly bastardize real adages.  And If Not Me Who.
     Fifth paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Maybe they should give people in Southern Africa the vaccine just for fun and see how that turns out.  That'd be my first instinct.  Anyway.  Is South Africa relatively high vaccinated?  It's unlikely because of Africa but somewhat likely because of White People.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  South Africa is 8% white people.  Hmm.  I guess I was FOOLED by them being in power for so long.  Kinda imagined there were more of them.  My Mistake!  Either way maybe they're relatively high vaccinated because Like Me people mistook them for a country with lots of White People.  So they gave them vaccines by accident.  I guess that's possible.  Anything's possible.  That's what I've been led to believe.  The point is if we're so bad at containing Covids we're gonna stand no chance when Zombies show up.  Can't even control a disease that DOESN'T bring back the dead.  Hey coffee time. 
    We're not gonna know how serious new Covid Strain is for another week or two apparently.  So it's gonna be AT LEAST that long till we get an update from ESPN / MLB.  Anyway Vacation Day yesterday I took 5 walks instead of 7.  And did one set of push ups and sit ups instead of fifty.  Amazing.  The point is we all made fun of Trump and Republicans for wanting to build a wall but now that New Covid Strain is coming I bet we all wish that wall was finished don't we.  We sure seem dumb now!  Anyway.  This is easy to beat.  Just NOBODY GO ANYWHERE.  PLAY IT SAFE.  NOBODY DO ANYTHING.  ESPECIALLY IN SOUTH AFRICA.  How hard is that.  It's easy! Doing nothing is easier than doing anything!  This shouldn't be so complicated.  Anyway I know all about South Africa from Trevor Noah's autobiography.  Except how many white people there are apparently.
     Seventh paragraph.  Also JUST MAKE STRONGER VACCINES.  Easy.  Do what you're doing already and just add an extra ZIP to it.  Anyway what else is going on in the news.  97% better from Vaccine Side Effects.  I got that going for me.  Haven't shaved this week.  Arm isn't strong enough!  At this point I'll just shave on Routine Day but having skipped a week.  FASCINATING.  Does shaving protect from Covid?  Gotta imagine covid is CAUGHT in our facial hairs and that's how we get it.  Like some STDS.  Don't they live in pubic hairs.  And that's how they're spread.  Sounds about right.  I took, "HEALTH," in high school.  I feel like some STDS make themselves at home in pubic hairs.  How come there's no POSITIVE things spread by Sex.  We should be able to spread Covid Relative Immunity by sex.  That way people might want to have sex with me.  CAUSE I GOT THAT. 
     Eighth paragraph.  Not sure why I feel pain where they stuck me with Covid Vaccine.  Just spread across my body such that it's not even noticeable.  Why stay localized and thus more pronounced?  Just DILUTE yourself by mixing in with the rest of my body.  Easy!  This time around I know what to expect by spending 9 months at home with my family.  I GET HOW TO MAKE SPAGHETTI YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME TWICE.  That's about it.  Also we know now that we don't need to wipe down every single piece of grocery we get from Delivery Super Market.  Maybe we do with new variant.  Nah I don't think so.  We don't know much about this new variant BUT I think we can safely say I won't need to wipe down every single grocery because I don't feel like it either way.  So we got that going for us.  What else.  DAMN I'd have to do A LOT of circle walking in my room every day.  I don't like the sound of that.  Then again after Going Crazy From It for several weeks I'd settle into it and it'd be second nature again!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Anyway.  For a while my life was revolving around Walking And Meals.  Entries in the morning, sure, but after that was Walkings And Meals.  NOW it's revolving around eating mini Animal Cancer Crackers.  They're half the size of animal crackers.  They TASTE better and more.  And they're made by a company that causes cancer with other products.  But the point is I EAT THESE SUCKERS ALL THE TIME and I DON'T LIKE IT.  They're delicious but IT'S TOO MUCH STIMULATION EACH TIME.  I can't quite handle it!  What else is going on.  WAIT A SECOND.  How sure am I that I don't live in South Africa.  I clearly don't know much about it.  What if it's Where I Am?  Oh No I'm Scared Hold Me. WAIT A SECOND.  GET OFF ME.  I gotta stay away from people THERE'S A NEW VARIANT.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  I feel like we should make a rule that everyone gets One Day Outside By Themselves during All-Out Pandemic Quarantining.  One day where one person is allowed to go out and nobody else.  That way I can get some walks in At Least Once.
     Hmm.  What else is going on.  Solid chance Vaccines work against New Strain!  I dunno if it's 50/50 of 98/2.  But either way AT WORST 50/50.  I don't know why I'm comfortable saying that but for some reason I am.  Go figure.  Also if it IS vaccine irresistible is there ANY chance we get our act together and contain it to Where I'm Not?  Gotta imagine there's some small possibility we can do that, too!  Also what's important is keeping it away from Where I Am.  That's where I draw the line!  What else is going on.  Gonna take another walk soon.  I can do that.  It's pretty easy!  Also Terrible News Starbucks installed the Keypad Lock on their bathroom.  Gotta know the four digit code to use it!  Presumably I can ask them ONCE and then I can use it in perpetuity for the rest of my life.  Yeah but I'd still have to ask them ONCE.  They might remember me from several years ago.  I don't wanna talk to people who remember me!  Not sure why.  Now that I think about it who cares.  Hmm.  Walk Time!  Be back soon.

That's Not What I Meant

    I READ ON TWITTER ONE GUY SAID while the new variant is very concerning for many reasons, it's unlikely to be vaccine resistant.  Which is good news for Me and Mine.  Also this guy MUST be right because it was the first short twitter thread I came across.  Anyway what else is going on.  Now that I've spent the first few hours of the day worrying about New Covid what can I do with the rest of the day.  There's no more Expendable Movies Yet.  THANK GOD.  Those were pretty shitty.  I like the parts where Sylvester Stallone and Jason Statham fist bump with wrists.  That's about it!  It's like a fist bump but they're bumping wrists.  I probably have seen it before but it never really registered.  Now I wanna do it all the time?  Anyone out there wanna be Wrist Bump Buddies?
     Yeah!  If this guy on twitter wasn't for real I don't think he would be able to write a 7 tweet thread on the subject.  At that point we HAVE to take this guy seriously.  Anyway what else is going on.  Cans of Soda = 7 Up and A &/V W Root Beer.  Delicious.  What else is going on.  I saw airlines ARE KEEPING AN EYE ON IT.  I feel safer already.  Hmm new covid strain very transistable.  LETS MONITOR THE SITUATION FOR A FEW MONTHS.  Anyway.  What does it matter Covid is AIRBORNE.  Doesn't need a plane to fly it from place to play.  It can Fly Itself!  Gotta imagine New Strain is SUPER SMART and can infect people at will.  And fly across long distances at will.  Look maybe this strain isn't there yet.  But in a couple of hundred strains from now we'll be facing an intelligent virus!  You heard it here first.
     I hope so.  If you heard it somewhere first LEAVE THAT GUY ALONE.  You don't wanna be listening to that kind of person.  Unless it's me.  I'm the exception that proves the rule!  Anyway.  Arm where they shot me full of vaccine is mostly better now.  Still a bit of pain but I'm able to do Them Push Ups What Which I Do.  Amazing.  Also I must be doing push-ups really badly because the slight muscle definition I'm accumulating is more pronounced on my right arm than my left.  Trying to Course Correct the last week and put more weight on left arm than I was doing naturally.  May or may not be helping!  We don't know yet!  It's all speculation!  Will take another week or two to see for sure!  Anyway Great.  If Vaccine is Mostly Effective But Not Quite As Much against new strain, I think my parents MAY let me continue to take walks.  Which for me is the main thing that would make my life better if I was quarantining more otherwise.  FASCINATING.  ALSO very good sentence structure.  I clearly know am what I doing.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  FASCINATING.  Successfully chewing less gum!  Half the walks over the last few days have been 1 piece of gum and the other half have been 0.  WHAT PROGRESS.  WHAT FASCINATING PROGRESS.  Still re-upping with gum for tomorrow's Super Market Order.  If I decide I want it I need to have it available!  That's just common sense.  The point is what else.  When was the last time I took a day off from Entrying.  Either April or May.  Whatta streak.  Now I gotta start all over if I wanna build a better streak.  I don't CARE about building a better streak.  It means nothing.  Interesting counterpoint.  I like looking up calories for Meat Products because half of the websites are from Big Meat Industry and they always lowball it by a lot.  Not sure why I like that.  I don't like it.  I don't hate it!  I just notice it.  Now you know about it, too.  Look I'm AGAINST IT.  I think lying should be wrong!  But it personally doesn't effect me that much one way or the other.  I CAN SEE THEIR POINT OF VIEW.  They want more people to buy and eat meat.  Which they will if they think it's slightly healthier.  I GET IT.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing!  LOOK maybe Big Meat Industry knows something the rest o us don't and their calorie estimates are actually accurate.  Probably not.  Anyway gotta imagine that should be the next thing congress should hold hearings about.  IS BIG MEAT LYING TO US re: Calories Of Meats.  LET'S GET SOME ANSWERS ONCE AND FOR ALL.  Or at least ONCE.  Maybe not For All.  That's asking too much!  Ugh.  I'm starting to really hate this new Mets Owner.  He's an idiot who is turning off people from wanting to work with the Mets.  SURE he says he'll spend a lot of money on Payroll which is good.  But if no one wants to play for The Mets because of this jerk what's the difference.  Guess I gotta find a new franchise to root for.  I root for franchises based on how much I like the owner.  Hmm.  Gonna have to do some deep research into which Baseball Franchise Owner is the best.  Anyway the point is it's time for me to take a Cleansing Experience.  Be back soon.

It's Your Loss

    Hey!  Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Lizards Communicate by doing push-ups.  LOOK I didn't believe it the first time you told me that and I don't believe it the second time.  Get it together!  Either way if we're vaccinating lizards from Covid they might have to take a day or two off from communicating.  Their arm shoulder area might hurt!  Also are we vaccinating animals?  BATS at least.  We know bats can get it.  I guess nobody cares about the bats.  Fair enough!  I don't care about them bats.  Why should anyone else.  I think we should purposely give Bats the new covid variants that we made ourselves.  See how THEY like it.  Hmm.  What do I have in store for the rest of the day.  Be Thanksful I can take walks and get food deliveries.  DAMNIT Thanksgiving was ONE DAY too soon.  Had no reason to be thankful yesterday.  Maybe I do today.  Maybe I don't!  Get of my back about it!
     Sure.  Did I eat anything special for Thanksgiving.  OH.  I had a sandwich.  Not turkey!  But deli meat for sure.  Roast Beef.  I feel like having a deli meat sandwich for lunch is Thanksgiving Enough.  Prove me wrong!  HEY I got Those Beatles Docs to watch.  I can't wait to see what Them Beatles were all about.  I bet they're great guys making great music.  That's the impression I've been operating under but I guess we'll see for sure now.  I think Peter Jackson put together the Beatles doc so I'm assuming Andy Serkis is playing all the Beatles.  TOPICAL HUMOR.  I feel like I don't need to do 50 sets of push ups and sit ups a day.  20-30 is probably much more than enough.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  What else is going on.  Right now my favorite Beatle is.. hmm.  Let's go with Paul McCartney.  Not sure what I'm basing it on.  I think it's PARTLY that he's still alive.  I LIKE that.  But after watching this I'll be much much better informed about who and why to like the most.  AND OR HATE THE MOST.  Coffee time.
     Anyway.  Hah!  I just returned to my computer and looked at google chrome and saw I had googled Andy Serkis and was reminded of the joke I just made all over again.  Is it amusing?  NO.  Is it a joke?  YES.  So basically I'm halfway there is the point I'm trying to make.  I'm a little concerned I won't like watching The Beatles doing things that isn't Just Music.  Hey they're talking at each other and whatnot.  Why aren't they playing some Classic Song.  I like the Beatles music.  They should be doing that All The Time.  One way to think about things I guess.  Also will I be able to relate to their facial hair?  I dunno!  Might be scary and confusing to me.  I haven't watched in detail the trailers.  I've seen them once or twice but I didn't focus in that much.  What else is going on.  If they're Wrist Bumping each other all the time I say this movie gets Picture Of The Year from all them award shows.  That's just the touch that would put this film over the edge!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Jeez.  Gonna have to figure out stuff to do today.  That sounds Hard and/or Uncomfortable.  Look even if I'm lucky enough to think of ONE thing to do, that'll last half an hour or an hour maybe.  An hour and a half if we're really lucky.  And then we're back to nothing.  And thinking of One Thing is basically a best case scenario already.  Oh right Beatles Doc.  I just spent a paragraph talking about it.  I forget things when the paragraph is over.  I like a nice clean slate.  Get off my back about it.  Anyway.  Watched HOME ALONE a few nights ago.  Am about 15 minutes into HOME ALONE II.  I can finish that.  I like the part where Things Happen.  My favorite part of any movie!  Mostly.  Maybe not always.  Lots of movies you enjoy when nothing happens.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Fascinating.  Yesterday was good because I had a blast just lying in bed doing nothing half the time.  Really enjoyed that.  Now I feel even if I tried doing that today I wouldn't get as much out of it.  That's life I guess!  HEY let's check out the National Day of the Food Day.  MAIZE DAY, NATIONAL CAKE DAY, and SINKIE DAY.  Maize is corn.  We know this much.  FINE.  Not a fan but it's my name so that part I like.  Cake?  Cake is Great!  Not sure about NATIONAL Cake.  Depends on the nation I guess.  And the way they choose to make their National Cake.  Sinkie?  Let's see what that means Once And For All.  National Dine over your Sink day.  Not liking it guys.  I think you've given up too much on life.  You can do better.  Don't celebrate this c'mon.  Let's see of National Cake is actually a specific cake.  NOPE.  Just cake in general.  Well great that's it.  I'll be back tomorrow probably.

-1:43 P.M.

Wednesday, November 24, 2021 

Get To The Point

    Hello friends.  Ya Boy Michael ain't feelin' too good.  Kinda flu-ish and weak.  Arm hurts where they shot me.  Hurts just to lift up my arm!  PLUS it hurts just to lift DOWN my arm!  I can't win!  Unless I don't move my arm.  But that's not always practical!  The point is I still have it in me do to my Neighborhood Patrols but I cannot do push-ups.  I could theoretically do sit-ups but I dunno we'll have to see how that pans out.  The point is Not sure what I was thinking when I said I wanted to feel sick.  I thought it'd be FUN.  And the weak flu-ishness is KIND OF Fun?  But the arm stuff is a hassle and a half!  Anyway normal Friday Super Market order is pushed back to Saturday.  Because of Thanksgiving Shenanigans.  So I have too little beverages among other things to last me!  THANKS A LOT GOD.  WAY TO BLOW.
    Also now I wanna drink the beverages I do have EVEN QUICKER.  I feel the stress and worry and it just makes me want to drink delicious flavored water all the more!  Anyway Cranberry Patriotism Fact #1 Of The Day... A group of Goats is called a trip.  I disagree.  It's called Goats.  See-- you jus did it in that sentence!  Don't try to deny it WE ALL SAW IT.  Also I Don't like all these goats congregating.  What are they up to.  It can only be trouble!  Anyway.  I assume when I am able to start doing push-ups again I don't have to start at Zero.  And can start at 20.  Huh.  What does that mean.  It means the day I start doing pushups the first one I do I say silently to myself TWENTY and then the next one is TWENTY ONE.  Not sure what the practical point of that would be.  Not sure of any impractical points, either!  Totally clueless on what this means.
     Sure!  Got coffee cooking.  That might provide me the spark I need.  To do stuff.  Presumably there's stuff to be done and there needs to be sparks to achieve doing them.  Down to my penultimate clean shirt.  My mom said she's doing laundry today.  I hope she's right!  She has NO margin of error.  It's either today or too late.  PRESSURE'S ON.  Wait a second I have a shirt for tomorrow.  She has SOME margin of error.  Well this is great news for her.  Not so great for me.  Means I might have to wear another Reject Shirt that I put off for good reasons.  Button down shirt!  Looks nice but too many buttons!  I can't put all that work into a shirt connecting buttons into holes.  I got places to be.  Neighborhood needs patrolling!  Also at what point do I buy a gun.  I figure if you're patrolling a neighborhood you might as well keep that option in your back pocket if I feel like it I should have the choice to kill someone.
     Maybe that only works in neighborhoods you don't live in.  Gonna have to look into that one.  You can't kill people in the neighborhood you live in.  The neighborhood would revolt and kill you.  If you don't live there it's too long a trip (Group Of Goats) so why would they even bother.  GOAT Means Greatest of all time.  If you get a group together of the greatest of all times suddenly they're a Trip.  You can't have multiple greatest of all times.  There can be only one.  Maybe it's Greatest Of All Times At Different Things.  Ever think of that?  I probably would have had I been given enough time.  You kinda sprung it on me so I didn't even have a chance.  Quit your complaining you idiot.  Maybe don't do all the walks today.  Makes sense.  Normally I'd do seven.  Instead maybe do less than seven.  Not sure what the magic number is.  Oh.  I know.  SEVEN.
     Last paragraph before coffee!  These entries go way to quickly without taking Shit-Up/Push-Up Breaks every paragraph.  Also with Writing Crap.  I'm the greatest of all time at writing crap.  Depending on your definition of crap.  There is a very very unique specific definition of crap in which I am in the discussion for greatest of all time.  I feel like that's accurate.  I didn't shave last night.  Can't do it tonight!  My arm wouldn't allow it.  Unless arm feels better by tonight.  We'll have to see how that, "Shakes Out."  What else is going on.  The point is in all my walks the last 7 or 8 months I somehow can't think of A SINGLE person I came across that I wanted to kill.  I must not have been paying close enough attention.  What else is going on.  I wonder how many people walked by me and wanted to kill me.  Gotta imagine there's been several.  Lots of weirdoes out there!  And I wonder how many people wanted to kill Specifically Me and not just anybody.  Gotta know what I did or how I appeared that made them single me out for wanting to end my life.  Maybe it's something I can change and/or accentuate!  Coffee time. 
    I could check what National Day Of The Food Day it is.  But that would just be rubbing it in.  It could be something I would want and even if it was within reach to me I wouldn't be able to grab it!  Arm hurts too much!  What about the other arm.   This thing takes two arms.  I could do it if I really had to.  Well let's see what the food is anyway. DrinksGiving and National Sardine Day.  Sardines are like anchovies!  There was a day a week ago that SPECIFICALLY went out of its way to say NO ANCHOVIES.  Good to see Sardines pick up the ball and make things right.  Anyway what's DrinksGiving.  Thanksgiving but you drink alcohol is my best guess.  YEP.  Night before Thanksgiving where people come into Home Town and drink with each other.  Amazing.  I live where I live already.  Everyday is a drinksgiving at my house!  Except for the drinks.  And also the givings.
     Seventh paragraph.  What else is going on.  Not doing anything for Thanksgiving.  I'm DISABLED what can I do.  I got an arm that's doing me no good except pain.  Probably should consider amputating it.  Short term solution with long term ramifications, sure.  But I'd be in less pain for the next few hours so it's something to consider.  Might have phantom Arm Pain.  It could happen!  Then I'm in pain AND without an arm.  I'm really coming out of that situation worse for wear.  Anyway.  I've never had phantom pain of any kind I don't think.  But where would I have it.  Off the top of my head only things I've lost in life are baby teeth and foreskin.  And I haven't had pain where those things used to be.  Not off the top of my head.  As of now I think I'm gonna aim for taking All Walks.  That way I... uh... that way... who cares.  It's my life and it's my choice!  Presumably.
     Eighth paragraph.  Now the real question is Shit-Ups.  Think I'll do them but maybe half as much as I would normally do.  Yeah!  Not doing anything for Thanksgiving tomorrow but Brother is coming on Saturday.  That's FAMILY.  We won't have special meal most likely but Bonus Family Member Day is a decent Thanksgiving showing for a family.  ALSO complicating taking walks today is IT'S COLD.  I don't like the cold.  What if I freeze to death?  Then I'd be dead!  Which is THE OPPOSITE of what I'm trying to accomplish.  HEY I'm also running low on GUM.  I think I could get my parents' approval to buy some 2 liter bottles of soda and some gum on one of my walks.  Or maybe get them delivered from some convenience store.  I've got a pretty good case I could make!  YEAH.  Anything else I need that I would have gotten on Friday but now won't have that I need on Friday or before Friday that getting on Saturday wouldn't be enough to get this week.  What a wonderful sentence.  Let's never forget it.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  HMM this is a tough one.  Raspberry Snapple or Lemon snapple for next week.  I think I'm gonna go back to Lemon but Raspberry has impressed me!  I WILL get it again just maybe not this week.  GOOD STUFF.  What a wonderful story.  Let's never forget it.  I'm getting to a point where I don't feel that flu-ish or weak much at all.  Maybe a bit!  A little bit!  But not debilitating really at all.  ARM still causing me problems.  But the point is Walking should be okay.  IF NOT FOR THIS DAMN COLD.  I don't remember signing up for it being cold.  No one thought to consult me!  Maybe they did but they never acted on that thought!  Which is what counts!  Thoughts are nice but ACTIONS are what matter.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Oh No it's gonna be cold outside for walks MOST DAYS over the next several months.  This is the worst news I ever heard since 15 minutes ago when I heard some bad news somewhere.  Don't remember where it was or what it was.  But it was probably worse news then this Cold Walking Thing.
    Yeah!  Gonna take a walk after this paragraph.  It's what I would do standardly and I don't feel like I have to avoid doing it for health or comfort reasons.  What a wonderful life.  I'm a little concerned if I go into a convenience store to buy soda they might give me another booster shot.  I've had my fair share already!  No Thank You!  THEN AGAIN I'd be some sort of SUPER MAN with 4 shots.  I don't wanna be Super Man.  I'm okay with just being Man.  Based on mostly being Boy.  Man alone is a step up that I aspire to!  What else is going on.  Sleeping was a hassle last night.  Kept waking up in some sort of pain or weakness or flu-ishness or it was Too Cold or Too Hot.  I don't remember all the details apparently.  But there were problems!  HEY it may be several degrees warmer than it was over an hour ago.  Great.  I'll be back in a little bit.

I Think You're In The Wrong Place

    Hi friends.  Took a walk.  Did a round of Push-em-ups!  It went okay.  Now my arm is broken but that's the price you pay when you do things.  HEY time to write some more paragraphs.  Found a nice grocery type store to order from door dash.  We're talkin SODA.  We're talkin GUM.  We're talkin maybe try a box of GRANOLA BARS.  The granola bars contained within.  I will not consume the box!  That's where I draw the line.  I feel like I've eaten paper as a goof when I was a kid.  That made people laugh.  Not with me but hey you take what you can get!  Also delicious.  Also not a RECURRING thing.  Every lunch wasn't hey Michael's gonna eat some paper again!  NO.  ONE AND DONE.  Got it out of my system and that was that.  Also it can't be BAD for you.  It's paper. If it was bad for you they wouldn't let you get near it.
     Wonderful.  Bathing Experience coming up in a few paragraphs.  I like that!  It's okay!  I'll drink some bath water.  That will make people laugh.  Not WITH ME.  Solidly AGAINST ME.  But this is the life I chose.  What's today.  Wednesday.  Big deal!  It's Wednesday all the time.  I get nothing out of Wednesdays.  Get to watch Previous Night's CHUCKY Episode.  That's the exception that proves the rule.  Now maybe if I was at a DrinksGiving party that'd be a different story.  Maybe a better story.  Maybe a worse story.  I might be shy and reserved and get drunk and sitting at a table and everyone else is talking and I am not participating at all.  That's no fun!  Also accurate description of what would happen at a DrinksGiving exercise!  This isn't MY fault.  It's on THEM to engage ME.  They're not doing their job and I blame them for everything wrong about my life.
     Anyway.  The fun part about sitting at a table in a bar with other people having fun is When AND HOW do I make my leave.  I can't stay there indefinitely.  But I gotta pick a time to leave that doesn't call attention to myself and bother and/or upset other people.  Also lemme sit here a little while longer I NEED SOME TIME TO PROCESS what's going wrong with my life.  That sort of thing.  Also I'm too drunk to wanna get up and leave.  Not only do I need to process what's going wrong with my life I CAN'T THINK WELL I'M SOMEWHAT TOO DRUNK.  So basically YES I'd like to participate in DrinksGiving.  What else is going on.  It's RELEVANT because I don't know what to say NOW.  Everyone else in the world is talking to each other at a table in a bar and I'm at the table not talking to anyone.  I'm not drunk though.  I took a klonopin!  Well that's something I guess.  Getting FIBER ONE PRODUCTS I never get because it's from Amazon Fresh instead of normal Super Market.  THIS IS THE BEST NEWS SINCE the last piece of news that was slightly better than this!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  What else is going on.  Maybe I should be drunk.  I've been DRUNK ON POWER for months.  The power of doing all the exercising my little heart desires.  Power over my life and control of my routines.  Now I have to do slightly less and am in slight discomfort too.  I DON'T LIKE IT.  I NEED ALCOHOL TO COURSE CORRECT.  No I don't.  It couldn't hurt.  But I won't.  Hey that's life I guess.  Maybe I ain't in a good mood because I Woke up half thinking hmm maybe take it easy today.  Don't do anything really.  And then I ended up doing EVERYTHING.  There was brief hope I could have a break from life.  Oh well what can ya do.  Life will break when it's really necessary.  That's my impression.  What was the other thing besides DrinksGiving.  Oh.  Sardines.  Not sure I've ever had a sardine!  But sure hook me up with a sardine.  I'd eat sardines like it was nobody's business!  Because IT IS Nobody's Business.  This is a private moment between Me and A Sardine.
     Last paragraph before Cleansing Exercise!  Pretty sure Sardine is the name of a magician either in real life or fiction.  That's not the kind of Sardine I'm interested in.  I could do without magicians.  LEAVE ME OUT OF IT.  Anyway.  What's the next holiday people celebrate after Thanksgiving.  First thought is My Birthday.  But not sure how widely celebrated that is beyond Me.  It's not even a big deal for my immediate family.  They know about it but do they Really Care?  Probably not!  But that's my fault I haven't built up a compelling case for them to care.  Sure great.  But the point is there's no My Birthday Themed Movies on TV starting after Thanksgiving.  There wasn't last year at least.  Anyway I'm gonna take a bath now.  Be back soon!

Thank You For Your Concern

    Think I'm gonna try to quite gum!  What do I get out of gum really.  I feel like after a few days I won't even notice it's gone.  Also I was watching TWO adaptations of Charlie And That Chocolate Factory and here's a girl who chews too much gum and it DOES NOT work out well for her.  Well in the end she's back to normal.  But she learnt a valuable lesson.  Don't chew so much gum.  Especially gum you're not familiar with.  Gotta be careful out there.  So the point is that's one Life Advancement Opportunity I'm putting into practice today.  Today was suddenly WORTH something.  The day I got off gum!  Now we're talking!  Anyway getting some cans of soda from Amazon Fresh.  Not happy about it.  Amazon annoys me lately.  Their Logo.  The thing that kinda looks like a smiling mouth underneath text or whatever that I guess is the rest of the face.  ENRAGES me.  Oh well what can ya do.  Stay inside all day?  Well that's one option but an extreme one.
     What else is going on.  Coffee after this paragraph!  I guess.  Settling into a normal day more or less.  DAMNIT.  I've been enjoying normal days sure but ENOUGH'S ENOUGH.  Probably.  Lots of Fiber One Products I'm getting that I haven't had in a long time.  That's probably the best thing to come out of today.  That and All The Good That Occurred Around The World To Hundreds Of Millions Of People.  I was gonna say Billions of people, but I'm not convinced that Good Occurred Today To That Much More than 10, 15% of people across the globe.  Pretty shitty world we live in!  That's my rough estimation off the top of my head at least.  Mets owner is apparently a baby.  A player he wanted to sign signed with another team and the Mets Owner threw a big stink about it.  Well that'll get people to want to play and participate in The Mets Organization.  A Baby Owner.  Couldn't hurt.  Wait.  Wait.  OF COURSE IT CAN.
     Coffee time.  Think of all the other food I could accomplish if I wasn't chewing gum.  Hmm.  Off the top of my head?  Hmm.  Maybe slightly more creamer/milk in coffee.  That's a good one.  I like that.  The point is what else is going on.  Anyway I feel like my family definitely isn't doing anything for Thanksgiving but I can be a Family Rebel by doing something personal.  I don't know WHAT though.  Order Boston Chicken on Door Dash is my first thought.  That would make my therapist proud of me.  Each appointment she grades me on what purchases I've made based on her suggestions.  So if I make more purchases based on her guidelines I will have Higher Mental Health.  So it's a Double Win basically.  Except for how I don't need to get food for tomorrow.  Already got food!  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.
     Penultimate paragraph of the day!  Great.  Am I looking forward to drinking cans of soda for two days?  I WASN'T but now that I'm explicitly thinking about I STILL AREN'T but the more I explicitly think about it the more I come to terms with AT SOME POINT IT WILL REGISTER AND I WILL BE VERY EXCITED ABOUT IT.  Soda cans are the best.  You can cut your finger on them if you're playing with them!  Don't play with them.  Unless it's twisting the thing that Pops the top off off.  You can twist that off with LITTLE RISK if you know what you're doing.  Then you're having fun!  Hmm.  Gum that went wrong for girl who chews too much gum In Chocolate Factory was SAVORY Gum.  Of course that's gonna go wrong.  Gum can't and SHAN'T be savory.  You get what you deserve trying to make and/or chew a savory gum.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  Been doing some push-em-ups.  No PAIN is gonna tell ME what and whatnot to do that might further the pain.  Also if I don't do enough today then by tomorrow I'll have to start over AT ZERO WE DISCUSSED THIS.  I feel like I've played with soda cans more than my fair share in life and probably NEVER cut myself.  Maybe 3 or 4 times.  But possibly NEVER.  I live on the edge that's just the kind of guy I am.  What else is going on.  Should I continue to chew gum today?  I dunno!  No time like the present to make a major life change.  Well there's also The Future.  The PAST if you could figure out how to arrange that.  But mainly the point I'm trying to make is I forget.  I could WEAN myself off.  Chew one piece at a time instead of two during walks for a couple of days.  I dunno maybe this calls for a clean break.  Hey the entry is over!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:38 P.M.

Tuesday, November 23, 2021 

What Do We Have Here

    Hello friends.  Just got my booster shot.  So far I MAY feel some fluish symptoms coming on.  Which is great because it's fun to do new things.  I've done flusih symptoms before but it's been a while so it FEELS new to me.  Anyway watched That Exorcist III last night and it was pretty scary!  I liked the part where it was spooky.  But that's just me!  Maybe you liked the opening credits or the Star Wipe Cuts.  Also it's scary because III is the sign of the devil.  It's one of them.  The Devil's got a lot of signs.  Too much!  Pick one and move on with your life.  Anyway was suffering from crippling gas last night with no way to expel it.  Was very uncomfortable On Walk so I canceled next two walks to walk in circle in my room.  DUMB GAS.   Doesn't it know how to be Farted Away!  How hard is that! 
    I hate it when Phone Battery charge goes down quicker than usual.  HEY phone is at 85% this is great news it's gonna last me a couple of hours.  And then suddenly it's ticking down 4 percent every minute.  WHAT THE HELL WHY COULDN'T YOU JUST BE HONEST WITH ME FROM THE START.  I wouldn't have been MAD if you said you were at 35%.  I'd have UNDERSTOOD.  Just BE HONEST.  Anyway.  I didn't shave last night.  Maybe I will tonight!  Maybe I'll suffer from flu-ish symptoms and/or debilitating gas.  Can't hurt to dream.  Anyway waited a solid 13 minutes after shot to leave.  I'm no idiot I'm not gonna sit around for 15 minutes.  I got places to be!  13 minutes is a lot to get out of me and you should be happy with that!  Also maybe I felt sick 120 seconds after I left CVS MAYBE I DIDN'T get off my back about it.
     Sure.  The Exorcist III is an interesting movie because it was made in the 1990's but feels and looks like it was made in the 1970's.  Oh I get it.  Spooky time period mix up.  I understand.  Started watching Charlie &/Or The Chocolate Factory.  Been a while since I had a candy bar.  Forget fun sized bars.  When was the last full sized candy bar I had. My guess?  Maybe a Hershey bar from old Physical Super Market.  Maybe in 2018 or 2019.  Might have gotten a six pack a couple weeks in a row because My Mom felt like it and I had one or two.  DAMNIT THAT'S TOO LONG.  I need a candy bar AND I NEED IT NOW.  Also one with some CRUNCH to it.  Not crunch like a crunch bar.  More like a crunch like you're just regular biting a HARD Piece of chocolate.  YEAH CANDY BARS ARE DELICIOUS WHAT A PARAGRAPH.  This was only half the paragraph.  The other half discussed the time period of The Exorcist III.  Oh okay now I see how it's worth reading.  Hmm what was the first 2 paragraphs Saving Grace.  Uh oh.  NOTHING.  Three paragraphs in with NOTHING.  What can I do to turn things around.  TELL ME WHAT TO DO!!!
     Hmm.  No one is telling me what to do.  Seems like a pretty big oversight.  Anyway brought in Laundromat Laundry today.  Gonna pick it up later today.  WHAT A STORY.  I WANNA HEAR IT AGAIN.  Let's do it!  Had to get my shot today.  Before I did I brought in laundry to laundromat across the street from shot.  After they're done Laundromatting it I will pick it up and take it home.  WHAT A STORY.  LET'S HEAR IT AGAIN.  NO TWICE IS ENOUGH.  FINE.  Hey guess what I'm Going Crazier Than Usual!  FUN.  I looked up Hershey Bar on Super Market.  They have the standard six pack.  I could have a Hershey bar for breakfast.  WHAT WOULD PEOPLE SAY.  Probably negative things.  So that's one reason not to do it.  Also if you put Hershey Bar in fridge then you get a decent CRUNCH from it.  The kind of Crunch I'm talking about.  Where crunch isn't the best word but I can't think of a good one.  You know when you bite it and it SNAPS OFF the chocolate.  That's a good way to put it SNAPPING OFF.
    That's what teachers told me in 5th grade.  QUIT SNAPPING OFF MICHAEL WE'RE TRYING TO LEARN.  Anyway.  Just kidding.  Teachers in 5th grade LOVED when I Snapped Off.  They got as much of a kick out of me snapping off as the rest of the class And Myself.  Also only one teacher in 5th grade.  In elementary school you have single teacher.  But you get the idea.  I saw even if they pass Universal Pre-K states could just Opt Out.  GOD DAMNIT.  Dumb States.  I think we should be able to opt out of states opting out.  From other states.  I don't really think that but maybe I should.  It's Dumb Nonsense so I didn't put much thought into it but if I did I may or may not reach some sort of conclusion.  Huh?  Oh okay.  Maybe that would reflect poorly on State Leadership if they opt out.  Gotta imagine plurality of people even in red states would be on board for Pre-K.  Or as I call it to save time PREAK.  One syllable.  Saves time!  Let's get that trending.
    If three year olds could vote, would they want to go to Nursery School?  My best guess?  Can't fully understand the consequences one way or another.  I'm a smart guy now and presumably earlier in life, but a three, I don't think I'd be able to make an informed decision whether I want to go to pre-school AND/OR it being universally free.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Now that I've had 20 years to think about it I'm in favor of going to nursery school.  But it took me A LONG TIME to get to that conclusion.  Hey great amazing what else.  Not 100% sure the pain I was in last night was Gas Which Could Not Escape.  That was my best guess but it coulda been something else.  The point is it all worked out because after a couple of hours it went away.  YEAH!  TIME WINS AGAIN.  Any foe I face, I give it some time, and I end up winning!
     Seventh paragraph.  I remember at the time people being INFURIATED that in Charlie And/or The Chocolate Factory there was one oompa loompah who was digitally recreated to be all of them.  It was a big scandal for some reason.  Upon further introspection why do people care exactly.  Anyway.  Anyway I'm not sure Oompa Loompahs are all out slaves but they're definitely on the spectrum.  That's how I feel.  I know the Gene Wilder version was Willy Wonka and Chocolate Factory and Johnny Depp version was Charlie and Chocolate Factory but what was THE BOOK originally called.  Too bad we have no way of knowing.  My best guess is Charlie.  WAIT A SECOND.  I just had a crazy idea.  I could check the Internet.  Internet says it was Charlie.  Amazing.  Also I forget why exactly but I'm pretty sure Roald Dahl ended up being problematic.  Racism or Sexism or something like that.  Better LTURQ.  Anti-Semitism, racism, and misogyny.  All subset topics of his Wikipedia Page.  Oh well no one is perfect.  Except for Some Perfect Guy.  Not sure who it is.  Gotta be several of them at some point here and there.
     Eighth paragraph!  Perfect Guy OR LADY.  And it could be A JEW.  Or ANOTHER sufferer of Racism.  Anyway.  Also Roald Dahl?  Can't be happy with that name.  Maybe that's why he takes his anger out on other people.  Really ashamed of his dumb name.  Poor misguided soul.  Anyway.  Gotta do Chore of picking up laundry today.  Shouldn't be a big deal.  Think I'll actually shave tonight.  Last night my heart wasn't in it.  Tonight Let's Go For It.  YEAH.  What else is going on.  Are we supposed to identify with Charlie Bucket in The Chocolate Factory Story.  I mean, on the surface, sure.  He's an everyman.  Not a wealthy kid, is a very decent guy, just does his thing.  HOWEVER his last name is Bucket and I don't know about you but I cannot relate to someone named Charlie Bucket.  Almost as dumb a name as Roald Dahl.  YA LOST ME AT THE, "BUCKET," PART.  What else is going on.  Oh the end of paragraph I see.
    Also if a state opts out of universal pre-k then a state that wants it should absorb their universal Pre K.  Which means DOUBLE THE PREAK for that state's kid!  Not sure what that means.  Either they stay in school twice as long per day OR maybe they get universal pre-pre-K.  I haven't worked out the kinks yet.  Also education is a lifelong pursuit let's have some universal post-college.  No we need those people in THE WORK FORCE.  Oh okay that makes sense too.  How about universal POST-K.  We have that.  It's called School.  Okay but we need to further train teachers to accept and encourage Snap Backs from kids.  Amazing.  What else is going on.  Also Pre-K and Post-K doesn't cover K.  Which we also have.  Hmm.  Maybe they can write law in such a way you can't opt out of Preak.  I hope so!  I want the best for our nation's children even if they're the children of dumb people.  That's how great a guy I am!
     Last paragraph of the act.  The point is Priority One with Universal Pre-K is get them started on Critical Race Theory.  Gotta get to them while they're still malleable and impressionable.  Makes sense to me.  Anyway.  LOOK could Exorcist III been made in the 1980's?  Maybe.  It was released in 1990.  Oh well that's life.  I feel like there's too many problematic children book authors.  And also too many problematic artists and entertainers in general.  I know we should be able to separate the art from the artist but why do we have to do it so often.  Hmm.  I'm a, "Writer," and I'm not sure I'm very problematic.  That's EXACTLY what a problematic person would say.  Oh well.  You could probably phrase a Preak Law to make all states have to sign on.  Pretty sure states can't opt out of K-12.  Kids legally need to go to K-12 everywhere in he country!  Just apply that to Preak.  EASY.  Cracked that code.  I'll be back in a little bit.

I'll Give It My Best Shot

    Hey!  Time for the Second Act.  What do I got going on for me.  No side effects from shot yet.  Whatta gyp!  I guess there's still time to turn it around.  Look I don't wanna feel REALLY sick.  That would be a hassle!  But a little sick?  Couldn't hurt!  What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.  Except for how most illnesses and debilitations work.  They tangibly make you weaker even after the fact.  But BESIDES those things.  Hey I had lung cancer but I beat it.  STRONGER THAN EVER.  Not true!  Point is I made that point roughly seven times over the years.  It's a good point.  I'll probably make it 20 more times over the next few decades.  So far I've been successfully walking today without feeling pain.  Not bad stuff!  Let's see what the National Food Day Of The Day is Today. ... "Eat a Cranberry Day, "National Cashew Day," and, "National Espresso Day."  OKAY.  ESPRESSO.  I'm not sure I've ever had it but it sounds delicious!  Shows up in TIRAMISU.  And that's The Cake Of Cakes!  The other stuff is a Hard Pass.  By which I mean an Easy Pass. 
     What else is going on.  That's what you text to a lover whose going away for a mid-length amount of time.  TEAR, I MISS U.  You heard it hear first.  They say, "Tear," because they're crying.  Then they say, "I Miss You," because they're just about starting to miss you.   What else is going on.  Doesn't have to be a lover.  You can be crying that you miss a family member.  Sometimes a family member is a lover.  I don't recommend those sorts of arrangements.  What else is going on.  HMM maybe I wanna have a Birthday Espresso instead of an Iced Coffee.  I'm A MAN NOW.  Men drink ESPRESSO. I  dunno about that.  I feel like espresso is for the ladies.  Then again I feel like George Clooney is a spokesperson for Espresso.  He's a man.  But that campaign might be for the ladies because he's attractive to them.  Now I don't know what to think.  I didn't know what to think before, either.  Now I just Still Don't Know.
    Oh right.  Espressos are the MINI Drinks.  I'm combining Espressos and Cappuccinos in my mind.  I can COMBINE THEM for my birthday.  Not just in my mind but in reality.  SOUNDS LIKE A BIRTHDAY MIRACLE.  What else is going on.  The point is I'm triple vaxxed I should be able to get an iced coffee whenever I want at this point.  Gonna have to look into that one.  If anything iced coffee will make me safer.  I don't have the facts that would lead one to believe that but just trust me that I assume those facts exist somehow for humor.  Anyway.  Bath coming up!  That's fun.  I guess!  Is it my birthday Today.  I feel like I've talked about my birthday for the last few days.  This leads me to believe that by today it must be my birthday.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Feels like IT MIGHT be my birthday.
     Penultimate paragraph.  I wanted to browse around the CVS while waiting 13 minutes to leave.  See of they have any Fiber One products I'm interested in.  But I felt some slight pressure to SIT THERE IN THAT SEAT AND WAIT.  They never explicitly said I can't wander the store.  But the way they phrased it I got the sense that Oh Shit I Better Sit In This Seat.  Anyway.  THEY JUST LOST THEMSELVES A CUSTOMER.  I might have bought a box of granola bars.  Now that's never gonna happen!  Maybe later.  In a few years.  But it's gonna be A LONG TIME is the point.  They're gonna have to stay in business that entire time which will be Just Slightly Harder because they never sold that box of granola bars.  That might be the difference maker whether they last another 3-5 years!  Anyway it's also my loss because I don't get delicious granola bars.  But I'll survive.  Presumably.  What doesn't kill me makes me stronger!  INCORRECT.  I'd be SLIGHTLY WEAKER without the six granola bars to spread out over several weeks.
    Sure.  Anyway what else is going on.  Running out of days for there to be National Food Days Of The day.  After December 31st THAT'S IT! What do you mean it wraps back around and they start back at January 1st.  That doesn't make sense.  EXPLAIN YOURSELF.  Ugh.  Let's make an exception and skip ahead to see National Food Day Of The Day for my birthday.  "Gingerbread Decorating Day," "National Ambrosia Day," and, "Gingerbread House Day."  Well 67% of those things AREN'T FOOD.  And the other 33% I don't know what it is exactly BUT I DON'T LIKE IT.  Let's LURQ what it is exactly.  Creamy Fruit Salad.  You lost me at ALL THREE OF THOSE WORDS.  Anyway.  I mean, are we supposed to eat the Gingerbread Decorations after we're done making them?  Seems like a lot of work for nothing!  Same thing with the house.  Anyway.  I'll be back in a bit!

Here's Looking At You

    Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- One with Bears in Hammocks.  Dangit.  The point is lets move on with our lives.  The fact may be no good but the tea is delicious.  Sometimes I forget the premise of snapple is its iced tea.  I just think it's lightly flavored juice.  NOPE.  Iced Tea!  Tea is good for you.  AND FANCY.  I'm drinking a Fancy Health Drink right now.  And it being Raspberry only SWEETENS the deal.  No side effects from shot yet.  I had this shout over three and a half hours ago!  WHAT THE HELL.  I'm starting to doubt I'll feel anything ever.  Because I'm Dead Inside mostly.  But ALSO because this vaccine shot isn't giving me side effects!  I don't think I'm dead inside.  I'm actually pretty lively inside!  Mostly dead OUTSIDE though.  What a wonderful life I lead.
     Hey great what else.  Gettin' some LAUNDRY back today.  I gave it to them, then they give it back!  THAT'S THE DEAL.  Also I give them money for holding onto it for me for a while.  Sounds fair.  Look am I REALLY gonna get Hershey Bars?  No.  Not this week.  Not this month.  Not this year!  Possibly Next Year!  That's where I draw the line.   The thing I like about chocolate bars that are just chocolate is They Ain't Fuckin' Around.  You get a chocolate chip cookie or something, guess what?  90% of that IS JUST COOKIE.  Only 10% is chocolate.  Chocolate bar?  NO WASTED SPACE.  Just chocolate!  What about a chocolate chip cookie that's double chocolate and the cookie part is chocolate too.  GET OFF MY WEBSITE.  What you think coming to my website and making me look like a fool IS FUN?  IT'S NOT FUN FOR ME.  SEE YA.  Coffee time.
    Chocolate based cookie matter is still DILUTED.  It's not PURE, CONCENTRATED CHOCOLATE like a chocolate chip or a chocolate bar is.  NOW WHOSE THE FOOL?  Oh.  You already left.  Well for everyone else whose still here-- THAT GUY IS THE FOOL NOW.  Ugh.  Anyway.  IS IT POSSIBLE I've said absolutely nothing new or interesting this entry?  No.  Not possible.  IS IT POSSIBLE 75% of what I've said this entry is nothing new or interesting?  Yes.  Very Possible.  I LIKE THOSE ODDS.  1 out of 4 things is new and/or interesting?  It's like a treasure hunt!  Not sure people like treasure hunts.  Sounds like a lot of hard work.  And gotta imagine most treasure hunts DO NOT end in finding treasure but rather in failure to find treasure.  Gotta be demoralizing.  Anyway what else is going on.  If treasures were easy to find everyone would be a treasure hunter.
    Also why is that a thing.  People have treasures and then go you know what I'm gonna do with this amazing valuable stuff?  BURY IT SOMEWHERE.  Why not KEEP IT or USE IT or SPEND IT.  Nope!  GONNA BURY IT.  YOU KNOW FOR FUN.  Anyway what else is going on.  Sure I GET that the premise is usually I'ma bury it here and come back later to retrieve it.  Maybe because they're being chased or something and/or about to be apprehended so they need to stash their valuables somewhere.  Sure I GET things.  What else is going on.  Not in pain from Shot.  Not in pain from gas that's stuck in various parts of my body you wouldn't guess gas would get stuck in.  KIND OF in pain from thinking wrote an entire entry that I feel is entirely not good.  But at the same time I feel probably could move on with the rest of my day Forgetting That Fact for the most part.  So I got a lot going for me is the point!
     Last paragraph of the day.  Look maybe people who are burying treasure are just Great Guys.  Hey people will have a blast trying to find the treasure I like to do nice things for people because that's who I am.  In which case Good On 'Em!  What else is going on.  Also the people who FIND the treasure will have a TEN TIMES BLAST.  It's fun JUST TO LOOK.  Imagine how fun it would be TO FIND.  And then TO POSSESS.  That's how Devil gets off in The Exorcist Franchise.  He looks for people to possess.  HE FINDS someone he wants to possess.  THEN HE POSSESSES THEM.  10x better than just looking.  Anyway what else is going on.  I had to specify that's how the Devil Gets Off in The Exorcist Franchise.  And not just imply it's how he gets off in real life.  Because In Real Life we know VERY LITTLE about how the devil gets off!  Anyway.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:24 P.M.

Monday, November 22, 2021 

What's Going On Now

    Hi friends!  Monday time.  Gonna be a good one.  I have no specific responsibilities.  I didn't shave last night but I'm not gonna tonight either!  NEW ROUTINE TIME.  Tuesday Nights!  Feels right.  I dunno what I was thinking with Sunday Nights.  That's just dumb.  I don't know what I'm talking about.  I know kind of what I'm talking about.  I am trying IN EARNEST to figure out what the best night of the week is to shave weekly.  I don't know why I have to make this decision Now or Ever.  But I do!  I just don't have THE TOOLS at my disposal.  It's all guesswork.  Hmm guesswork sounds like easywork.  If my job was guessing I'd be sitting pretty!  Anyway my Dad was on phone trying to get him and I new phones for another few hours last night and now he's failed, too!  Gotta imagine at some point they'll relent and give us new phones.  Until then, Maximum Frustration.
     Jeez.  Booster shot tomorrow.  That sounds fun except for how my Dad is driving me to and from there.  I can walk to and from there!  I like walking!  It's My Thing!  But I need to bring LAUNDROMAT LAUNDRY too.  Can't walk all the way with that.  Too heavy!  And more than being heavy, too hard to get a comfortable grip on it for 20 minutes!  Hard to do it for 20 seconds!  OH NO.  The point is we've covered A LOT already this entry and it's only the second paragraph.  This is gonna be one for the ages!  Also I'm not comfortable that I'm carrying around 20 pounds worth of My Dad's Underwear.  I dunno where he gets all this underwear but he does get it and he needs it all washed at once.  Also he gets off on me having to carry it around.  That's his deal.  One would assume.  That's why we're in this situation in the first place.  No other logical explanation!  Amazing.
     Got some stuff to do today.  Same stuff as yesterday mostly but Slightly Different.  The sight and sound coming from my television set will be a slightly different output than it was yesterday.  Hmm sounds interesting.  Anyway.  Watched The Expendables One.  My thoughts?  Not great!  I did like the part where for the first act every 4 minutes it's like HOLY SHIT IT'S THAT GUY NOW.  Those were the main good parts of the movie.  Then it became kinda Nothin'.  Anyway.  There's two more of them.  Maybe there'll be NEW Holy Shit It's That Guys.  Or more likely less.  We've already been exposed to most if not all Those Guys.  Anyway.  Let's get National Food Day Of The Day out of the way.  Today it is... National Cranberry Relish Day.  You lost me at Cranberry.  Then you lost me even more at Relish.  Then you found me a bit at Day.  Then I returned to the beginning and re-discovered National and was on board with that word, too.
     Huh.  I feel like I have sliced turkey from the supermarket I will eat at some point from Tuesday to Thursday in Sandwich Form.  That's the closest I will get to celebrating Thanksgiving.  Hey closer than a lot of people.  I should be proud of my participation in America Holiday.  In sandwich form!  I can't believe onions are still no good to eat.  What's a Thanksgiving without onions.  A normal Thanksgiving.  Oh right yeah.  Last few times we did private Mini-Thanksgiving at house with me, my parents, and my brother, I would eat Big Turkey Drumstick as my main turkey.  Which is good because it's delicious.  But I felt GUILTY because I should be HELPING and PARTICIPATING in eating the main part f the turkey with my family.  I'm letting them down going off on my own working on this drumstick when I should be working together with them on regular communal parts of turkey.  Well that's in the past now we can't go back and change it.  I don't think so at least.
     Yeah!  Hey coffee coming up soon.  I've done nothing to earn it!  But I've also done nothing to punish myself by depriving myself of it, either.  Maybe I have.  I've been a bad boy this entry.  Writing boring that I know is worthless.  Oh well what can ya do.  DELETE the worthlessness?  TRY HARDER to write worthfulness?  That doesn't sound right.  Anyway.  Article on Mets Main Page ALONSO MEETS POPE ON HIS HONEYMOON.  I have several thoughts.  One-- didn't know the Pope was allowed to get married.  Two-- what do I care that Alonso met the Pope.  Quit rubbing it in.  Maybe I wanna meet the pope and now I'm just super jealous of this Alonso character.  Also Of Course Pope can get Married.  Pope is married to Jesus.  That's the impression I'm under.  Have I said anything interesting this entry.  That's a good question.  I'm gonna have to think about that one.  Coffee time.
     Sure.  Had to cough a little bit the last 60 seconds.  What's that about.  I shouldn't have to cough.  I've done nothing to deserve this!  What else is going on.  Feel like I wanna do something today.  Be ACTIVE.  Off the top of my head Play A Video Game.  That's TOO Active.  Isn't there something in the middle I can do between Not Engaging At All and Having To Play A Video Game.  Hmm.  Oh I know.  Watch someone else play a video game on The Youtube.  That's good because it can be any video game I can dream of!  Hmm what about some sort of sports game.  That might be fun to watch.  Anyway.  Could watch people play Online Poker Main Event Final Tables where I can see everyone's hole cards.  That's something I actually do like watching.  But then again What Else Is Going On.  THIS FINAL TABLE PAYOUT STRUCTURE ISN'T HIGH ENOUGH TO BE INTERESTING TO ME.  First place makes 200 thousand dollars?  LET ME KNOW WHEN FIRST PLACE IS MAKING 440 THOUSAND DOLLARS.  I have STANDARDS.
     Seventh paragraph.  Why is sports betting legal but not online poker.  Politics and Lobbying.  Oh okay that makes sense.  Anyway.  Keep refreshing Mets Page to see if Alonso is divorced yet.  Not sure why.  Been three weeks since new phase of Diet.  Probably will start Next New Phase at end of the year/beginning of next year.  And that will be last phase.  Until maintenance diet!  AMAZING.  I'm gonna look so good it'll make people uncomfortable!  Hey that guy is an appropriate weight.  Now I don't know how to feel comfortable anymore.  This is terrible.  That's what people who see me will say!  Also why do I want to make people uncomfortable.  SOMEONE'S gotta be uncomfortable in any social interaction.  That's what I've been led to believe by Always Being The Uncomfortable One.  I assume if I'm comfortable that means they have to be uncomfortable.  It's an assumption and I stand by it!
     Eighth paragraph.  I don't get the process of pardoning turkeys for Thanksgiving.  You're implying that turkeys are inherently guilty of something.  Sure it's in the bible.  Original Sin.  Turkeys did something wrong in Garden Of Eden.  We don't know what exactly.  Maybe we'll find out soon.  Probably lots of Bible Stories we never heard of but one day God will tell us and we'll be like OH MAN how have you been sitting on that one all this time that's GREAT.  Like the one where Turkeys do something bad.  Anyway.  I dunno about all that.  Maybe Turkeys SAW snake tricking Eve into eating Apple and SAID NOTHING.  Their silence made them COMPLICIT.  Sounds about right.  Anyway.  Then again only Male Turkey's Gobble.  So if it was a female turkey, they can't gobble, which is how they talk, so they can't say anything.  Hmm. 
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Maybe that's why female turkey's can't gobble.  God was like YOU SAW SNAKE TRICKING EVE AND SAID NOTHING.  NOW YOU WILL NEVER GOBBLE AGAIN.  Makes sense.  Too much sense!  I used to think people who believe in bible stories were dumb but now that I made one up myself I can see how they might make a lot of sense to people.  Anyway what else is going on.  I feel like I will celebrate Thanksgiving by Continuing To Live.  Solidly no plan of dying this Holiday Weekend.  Sounds good to me.  As a baseline that's certainly one thing we can try to get out of life.  Having it continue.  What else is going on.  Maybe I wanna meet the Pope. Has anyone ever thought of that.  Why would I wanna hear about other people meeting the pope. Just makes me feel sorry for myself.  Also what exactly is meeting the pope.  You seeing him?  Maybe shaking his hand?  Is that a meeting?  I think for a real meeting you need to have a 15 second or more conversation with him.  That's how I feel.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I'd rather meet the Dalai Lama.  He seems like a fun guy.  Based on nothing.  Well, I feel like I've seen A Dalai Lama being cool and funny but it may not have been the current one.  But either way probably pretty chill.  What else is going on.  Has there been any Thanksgiving Ceremony where it comes down to the 11th hour and they finally decide THERE WILL BE NO PARDONING TONIGHT. THIS TURKEY WILL BE PUT TO DEATH.  Gotta imagine once in a while that's the way they decide to go.  Maybe the turkey was just being a jerk throughout the whole process.  Maybe the turkey was just clearly guilty and there was absolutely no doubt about it.  Maybe the person in charge of Pardoning was suffering from bloodlust that 11th hour.  We don't know all the details because I don't think it ever happened!  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.

Everybody Doing Okay

    Hello friends.  Time to write some more paragraphs.  I can do that because I do it all the time.  Sometimes I feel like it's easier for me to write paragraphs than Live Life.  As long as the paragraphs don't have to be good.  Then Living Life is WAY easier.  Anyway.  I often come up with titles that I'm sure I must have used before, but I'm not gonna browse through 200 months and Search & Find those phrases each time.  Half a dozen months!  I go back to the spring of this year to see if I used these titles before.  If they haven't been used that lately GOOD ENOUGH FOR ME.  Also a lot of times I forget to do that and I'm using titles I used 2 months ago.  But that's not my problem!  That's your problem!  And WHAT A PROBLEM IT IS.  Anyway.  Chewing gum has had the ancillary effect of making me bite my nails less.  So that's one negative effect.
     Yeah!  Everyone should bite their nails it's called GROOMING and EVEN THE ANIMALS DO IT.  You're not worse than an animal are you?  Anyway.  I bet there's a huge scandal where they're publicly pardoning turkeys and then in the dead of night killing and eating them anyway.  That would be a HUGE scoop if it were true and some reporter caught wind of it.  Also is it necessary to the process to make the turkey think he's about to die.  So he FEELS the pardon.  Cause if he's just walking around thinking it's an average day what does he care about this pardon.  We need to put the fear of God in this turkey so he GETS what a big deal this is.  Might have said that before.  Why not say it again.  It's a real C+ piece of business!  Which is WAY higher than what I'm averaging on average.  Turkeys can't be happy about evolving from dinosaurs.  I think they imply that in Jurassic Park.  Turkeys gotta be like WE COME FROM A GREAT LINEAGE OF DINOSAURS AND NOW LOOK AT US. WE'RE A JOKE.  NOBODY RESPECTS TURKEYS ANYMORE.  But they can't do anything about it.  They're turkeys!  Totally useless!
     Anyway.  I think we should all have evolved from dinosaurs.  That way everyone wins.  What's the big deal about dinosaurs.  WHAT'S THE BIG DEAL ABOUT DINOSAURS?  WHAT PLANET DO YOU LIVE ON.  Dinosaurs are the greatest thing that ever happened to anyone anywhere!  I feel like this is nearly universally acknowledged.  I don't like dinosaurs that much.  I didn't think I did, at least.  I never CONSCIOUSLY liked dinosaurs.  But now that I'm going out of my way to think about it dinosaurs are the tops.  What else is going on.  I feel like I'm swallowing Pro-Dinosaur Propaganda.  Dunno where it comes from and why it is.  But part of me is like WHY, PRACTICALLY, do I like dinosaurs.  THEY'RE JUST SOME DUMB ANIMALS.  WHO THE HELL CARES.  I blame FILMS and CHILDREN'S EDUCATION BOOKS and SCIENCE.  It's ALWAYS those three that are leading us astray.  The dastardly combination of Film, Children Education Books, and Science.  Also why we like Rocketships.  IT'S A SCAM.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  I think we should shoot some dinosaur bones to Mars.  So that when we're long gone in 500 million years some other alien race will show and be like WAIT A SECOND.  THIS IS ODD.  DINOSAURS ON MARS.  WE'RE GONNA HAVE TO RETHINK EVERYTHING WE KNOW ABOUT THIS SOLAR SYSTEM.  So we may be gone but through practical jokes our spirit lives on.  One way to go about things as The Human Race.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna take a bath soon.  I like it because it's like taking a shower but without all the hard work of standing up.  I've had it up to here with standing up!  I feel like I already do it way too much.  Well laying down in bath is kind of like standing up horizontally.  Or standing up vertically on my back.  It's still vertical but sideways.  Hmm.  That makes sense to me.  Not sure why.  Pretty sure it shouldn't.  But it does and there's nothing I can do about that.
     Cool!  I think Jurassic Park was pro-dinosaur propaganda.  I think if we brought back dinosaurs it wouldn't be scary or a hassle to stay alive from them.  We'd kick their asses!  Wouldn't even be close.  Dinosaurs are not as worthy a foe as Films would have us believe.  That's my hot take.  Unless they team up with other animals.  ALL The other animals.  EVERY SINGLE ANIMAL against us led by dinosaurs?  Okay now that's gonna be a problem.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  You'd think if somehow you could explain Global Warming to animals they'd be against us.  If they understood we're destroying the planet then they'd definitely fight back!  And they'd be right!  I'm on the animal's side in this scenario!  Assuming they're using ORGANIZING and POLITICAL power and not We're Gonna Eat You Power.  I don't wanna eat heavy polluters because two wrongs don't make a right.  Also being around polluting all the time makes their meat less safe to consume.  The point is the act is over.  I'll be back soon.

Make Yourself At Home

    The frozen chicken nuggets I've gotten sporadically over the last few years are in Dinosaur Shapes.  Is that relevant?  It's DELICIOUS.  And now I'm wondering why haven't I gotten those lately.  Better LTURQ to see if they're available from Super Market Delivery.  HELL YEAH THEY'RE AVAILABLE.  My life just changed-- for the better!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also it IS relevant because turkey/dinosaur and then chicken/dinosaur.  Both poultry.  That's what I've been led to believe.  Anyway what else is going on.  Frozen Dinosaur Chicken Nuggets are a reasonable amount of calories.  I'm not, "Breaking the bank," by eating a lunch of these with some sort of side perhaps kettle chips.  Hmm.  I think I just figured out what I want to do for my birthday!  Chicken nuggets for lunch.  Already planning on getting Iced Coffee and donut for breakfast.  Now we figured out a lunch.  That's halfway the entire day.  It's gonna be one to remember!
     What else is going on.  Raspberry Snapple Time!  Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day... Plants, like humans, can run a fever if they are sick.  Interesting.  I don't know what that means.  What would a Fever Plant look like.  Not sure about that.  The point is Great I didn't get anything out of that Raspberry Patriotism Fact but maybe you did.  In which case I envy you.  What else is going on.  Maybe BEER for birthday dinner.  Chicken Nuggets in lunchtime and beer in dinnertime represents the Growing Adulthood that I am undertaking during birthday.  And the iced coffee and donut for breakfast represent I like delicious food and beverages.  I normally like Day Drinking if it's by myself.  I do stuff during the day!  Now I'm buzzed while I'm doing it!  What do I do in the evening anyway.  I'm getting buzzed doing nothing?  It means nothing!  Time for Patriotism Coffee #2.
     Hey!  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  Having a nice Food Delivery for lunch.  That happens about once a week!  Always a pleasure.  It's all on me what I'm getting!  No sharing with parents.  What I say goes!  AS opposed to whenever we get dinner.  Where 95% of the time what I say we end up getting BUT they presumably are okay with it too.  NO GOOD.  I don't want anyone else to be okay with where I'm getting food from!  ONLY I may enjoy this meal enterprise.  Anyway.  If plants are getting fevers is it on us to help treat them?  I feel like plants can't help themselves but at the same time who put it on us to take care of plants.  They're just gonna have to ride it out is my feeling!  Best of luck but I can't be fighting your Fever Battles for you every time you get sick!
     Penultimate paragraph!  Cool.  What have I accomplished today.  Laying down = Standing on your back.  That's about all I got out of today's entry off the top of my head.  Sure great what else.  I could shave tonight.  Makes sense.  But Tuesday just makes MORE sense.  It's TUESDAY you wouldn't understand.  Maybe it's because elections are Tuesday.  And I'm voting for no and/or significantly less facial hair.  That's one idea.  What else are Tuesdays known for.  Not much.  Well NOW they're known as The Day To Shave.  Let's get that, "Trending."  Imagine how great your life would be permanently if you got something trending at some point.  That'd be something you could go back to forever to validate your dumb life.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Anyway.  Is it illegal to give someone a gift on Thanksgiving.  I feel like they'd be like You Can't Do THAT Save it for Christmas.  Let's never even MENTION IT AGAIN.  Okay.  One more paragraph to go!
    You should be able to give gifts on Thanksgiving.  HALF OF THE HOLIDAY NAME IS CALLED GIVING.  Oh well what can ya do.  Not much!  This is the world we live in.  For NOW.  Huh.  There haven't been 200 months of crazysheet dot net.  Hasn't even been 120 months.  That'd be 10 years.  Roughly.  Every four years we get an extra month but you get the idea.  Closing IN on ten years.  Only a few more months!  Gotta imagine the first 7 years don't count though.  Gotta HOPE the first 7 years don't count.  If they count they're dragging down my average one would imagine!  Hey great that's wonderful what else is going on.  A little bit behind schedule today but not so much it'll effect the rest of my day.  So I got that going for me.  The day will be similar to the last day!  Worked out GREAT then.  I solidly am still alive since yesterday and that's the main thing I was going for.  Yeah we talked about that kinda stuff before.  Now I'm closing the entry with it.  It's called writing a conclusion.  The End!  Be back tomorrow.

-1:37 P.M.

Sunday, November 21, 2021 

Maybe This Will Be Alright

    Hello friends.  Today is Sunday.  Sunday Entry!  Nice relaxful one.  Everyone relaxes on Sunday.  Except for God.  It's his busy day.  Gotta make the rounds at all the churches.  Except for the False Ones.  So basically he's gotta go to around half a dozen.  Gotta imagine there's 6 or 8 churches in the world that are right on the money.  Also we're presuming they're ones that Special Celebrate Sunday.  I guess so.  Anyway got some company in store for today.  Dad's Blood Infusion Nurse.  Hopefully it's a sexy lady.  So I feel uncomfortable around her.  FUN uncomfortable.  This is uncomfortable but I'm getting a lot out of it.  That sort of thing.  Oh No she'll be seeing me at my least shaven!  Anyway what else.  Not happy with the clean shirts I'm down to.  Last three shirts are shirts I do not want to ear.  But I'm wearing one now.  Gotta wear SOME shirt.  Any shirt is better than no shirt.  Hmm.
     Yeah!  Are there other kinds of Male Tops other than shirts.  Gotta imagine I can wear a jacket as a shirt.  No one's gonna specifically go out of their way to stop me.  Not in most circumstances.  I feel like that's a corollary to wearing shoes without socks while out and about.  I've worn sweatshirt jacket without a shirt underneath a few times.  The point is I'm a clothes exhibitionist pervert but it's not sexual.  Maybe it's sexual.  What do I know.  I could be getting off without even realizing it!  Amazing.  Any new basketball documentaries.  Like the history of basketball.  I dunno if I'd wanna watch a History Of Basketball.  It'd be interesting I GUESS but it'd be all white people.  I don't wanna see all white people playing basketball.  It'd be like watching the Washington Generals facing the Washington Generals.  Which makes them EVEN WORSE because their best players are divided between two teams instead of on one team.
     What else is going on.  Gotta imagine the hoop started out as a basket.  But then it must have been a hassle every time someone scored a basket and they needed to get a ladder to retrieve the ball.  That would take forever.  Also originally it was melons they were throwing.  Tried to think of a fruit or vegetable about the size of a basketball.  Maybe a pumpkin.  Could have easily been throwing pumpkins into baskets on a pole.  I guess we'll never know.  You can't dribble a pumpkin.  Dribbling wasn't invented until the 1980's.  Oh okay.  Where do these poles come from.  Poles don't grow on trees.  Oh of course they attached the basket to a tree!  I see.  Okay.  That makes sense.  They had to grow trees exactly where they wanted them on the basketball court.  So it was a process that took several decades to make a basketball court.  But in the end it paid off IN DIVIDENDS.
     Okay.  Fourth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Also originally basketball was a way to ward off evil spirits.  I don't have any further details so you'll just have to take my word for it.  Ugh.  I should have more shirts available to me.  Ideally t-shirts.  And they might as well advertise bands I like.  HOW COME NO ONE IS ENCOURAGING ME TO GET BAND T-SHIRTS.  Seems like a pretty big oversight from the people who care about me.  Anyway.  Maybe some casual button down shirts.  Not a fan of button down shirts but we all gotta grow up sometime.  Probably.  Unless we're dead before it's time to grow up.  Then we beat the system!  Never have to grow up!  Fascinating.  Nurse doesn't have to be a sexy lady.  Just be a lady.  That's sexy enough for me!  Probably 75% chance she'll be a lady.  Based on past experience with nurses coming and the hypothetical gender breakdown in general of people who do this job.  I'm Gender Stereotyping GET OVER IT.
     But also mainly past experience GET OVER IT.  Anyway last paragraph without coffee.  Delicious!  Is what I will say and how I will feel Soon.  Today is Thanksgiving Week.  I am thankful for it being a week.  I wouldn't know what to do if there was a week that wasn't a week.  I'd be UPSET and then CONCERNED.  Ugh.  I think I'll make a point to wear mask around nurse.  I'm a good guy!  I'd rather avoid killing people if given the chance.  HEY I know what to do.  National Food Of The Day.  National Food Of The Day Is... National Gingerbread Cookie Day, National Stuffing Day, And Stir-up Sunday.  I guess the Stir Up thing is the third Sunday of the month or something.  Anyway I have nothing to say about those!  If it was only one thing I'd talk about it till the cows come home.  But I can't talk about three things!  WHAT A BRILLIANT RIFF.  Coffee time!
    Gingerbread cookie-- sounds good, not sure if I actually had it.  Stuffing-- great if its made right.  Stir-up-- not sure what that means and there's no way to find out other than clicking on it for it to reveal more details about the National Stir Up Sunday Day.  I don't have time to click hyperlinks.  I've got places to be!  FINE I'LL CLICK IT will that make you idiots happy.  No Us Idiots couldn't care less.  We'd be happier without it.  TOO LATE I'M CLICKING IT.  Some sort of Religious Pudding.  Didn't see that coming and I DON'T LIKE IT.  What else is going on.  WHERE IN THE BIBLE IS PUDDING.  It's sacrilege!  I dunno maybe there's plenty of pudding in the bible.  Never read it.  Also there's lots of them.  I wouldn't know where to begin!  Probably the one with the most followers worldwide.  Then work my way down.  So I think the first Bible To Read is Chinese Folklore Collections.  Hmm.
     Seventh paragraph!  Wonderful.  Lots of Chinese people.  And they love their amalgamations of folklore or something.  I don't have all the details!  The point is if it's a male nurse maybe I don't wear a mask because he's my main competition for Sexy Females??  Gonna have to think about that one.  Anyway.  People are gonna go crazy for Covid-20.  You heard it here first!  Maybe there already is a covid-20 and it's not a big deal.  Gonna have to look into that one.  RIGHT NOW.  No Covid-20 yet.  But once there is everyone is gonna throw out their Covid-19 and go to the store to buy the covid-20.  That's how the world works!  What else is going on.  I must have had gingerbread at some point.  I'm imagining like a cinnamon graham cracker.  Delicious.  I like me some solid stuffing.  The more solid the better.  Loose stuffing isn't for me SORRY.  Ya lost me as a customer and consumer.  Better luck next time with Stuffing-20.  MAKE IT SOLID.
     Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Anyway.  I was hoping Stir Up would be like Stir Fry.  Damnit!  Why does it matter.  I'm not eating these foods.  Yes but I want the foods I like to be celebrated!  And the foods I don't like to be thrown by the wayside!  I don't see what's wrong with that.  What else do I not see what's wrong with... that.  Hmm.  At what point after cyborgs are popularized do we start thinking about how okay is it to be sexually attracted to a cyborg.  Because cyborgs are half robot half human, right?  That's what a cyborg is?  Half humans need to feel attractive and be attracted at!  So we're gonna have to come to terms with this pretty soon.  I talk about cyborgs a lot.  Not sure why.  It's my one of my mail life goals to be a cyborg before I'm dead I guess.  I feel like that would work out to my advantage!
    Also if you're playing basketball with a pumpkin winning team gets to eat the pumpkin.  That's just obvious.  That's what you're playing for!  Then you'll need a new pumpkin for the next game.  What, do you think pumpkins grow on trees?  NO!  I'm pretty sure they don't!  They might.  I think they grow in pumpkin patches though.  I've heard that phrase somewhere so it must be what I imagine it means.  Huh.  I think when they first invented Jack-o-Lanterns it must have FREAKED PEOPLE THE FUCK OUT.  HOLY SHIT THAT PUMPKIN HAS A FACE WHAT THE FUCKIGN FUCK.  Also this is before TV and everything.  We're desensitized to horror.  In the 1800's a pumpkin with a face WITH A CANDLE LIT INSIDE?  That's the scariest thing that ever happened to someone in their life!  Anyway what else is going on.  Oh right the paragraph is over.  Whew.
     Yeah!  Can we make cyborgs with other species.  Why not.  I'd want a half robot dog.  The part that would pee and poop is now robot.  So it's just dog without any responsibilities to it.  Yes there's the show Robot Chicken that starts the conversation on this very issue.  I've never seen it.  Leave me out of it is how I feel about Robot Chicken.  HEY what else is going on.  You have to give Cyborg Dog LOVE.  That's a responsibility.  I feel like that would come naturally.  Hopefully.  And if it doesn't what do I care.  I apparently care little about this dog if I don't love it and thus I wouldn't care if I'm neglecting it.  I win either way!  Anyway.  I feel like when I see dogs on walks half the time they like me and half the time they don't.  And I'm always like hey this isn't how the LAST dog felt about me.  INTERESTING.  I'll be back in a little bit.

I've Seen Worse Titles

    Hey!  Nurse came.  I figured out why I felt like the nurse is almost always a lady.  Because it's almost always the same person.  Who appears to be a lady.  Cracked that code!  Anyway time to write some more paragraphs.  My birthday is in three weeks from today.  WOW.  Three weeks.  A month or two ago we discussed how Three Weeks should be some sort of standard period of time.  I have nothing new to add other than with further time to let that percolate inside my brain I feel it just as strongly as ever.  Maybe stronglier.  The point is WOW.  It's hard to tell that the nurse is a same person because she wears masks.  Most of the way I immediately identify someone is the lower half of their face.  This is what we've biologically evolved to do.  And now that's all being thrown out the window!  I don't like it.  Littering!
     Cool.  Also I'm not gonna look directly at this person.  I don't wanna make anyone feel uncomfortable by acknowledging their presence appropriately.  Better to direct my eyes away to show respect.  That's my first instinct.  Anyway.  Another 18 hours since I last checked and no one had officially disputed that new Mets GM is a Straight Up Guy.  At this point people have been given a chance to protest and make their contradictory feelings known and no one has stepped up!  I gotta believe this person IS A Straight Up Guy and if that's the case we got a STEAL.  Ugh.  Not sure how I feel about his last name.  Eppler.  Wait.  I am sure how I feel about it.  I don't like it.  But I'm not sure WHY.  Doppler Effect.  That's a weather thing.  But I don't mind the Doppler Effect so that can't be it.  Hmm gonna have to give a lot of careful thought into this Me Not Liking His Name.
     Yeah!  What is the Doppler Effect.  Let's LTURQ.  I DON'T GET IT.  I spent more time than I wanted to trying to get it (15 seconds) and I got no closer to getting it than I would have if I spent the amount of time I WANTED to spend (4 seconds).  And at this point I gave up.  Also it might be an Astronomy thing, not a weather thing.  Or a RADAR PLANE thing, not a weather thing.  It's hard to say because I Have No Idea What It Is.  NOW I know why I don't like Eppler.  Reminds me of Doppler and it turns out I HATE Doppler.  Oh okay now it's all coming together.  What a great paragraph.  I'm annoyed that I don't understand things.  Kind of the story of my life.  Except I've grown accustomed to not understanding things.  Doesn't annoy me as much as it used to!  Not understanding things is the nature of my life and I accept that.
     Penultimate paragraph.  The point is, Good or Bad, if Eppler becomes known for SOMETHING we can say The Eppler Effect.  For his sake I hope it's a positive story.  But it's more likely to be a negative story.  I told you I don't trust this guy so I am giving him the opposite of the benefit of the doubt.  I'm doubting his benefits.  That sort of thing.  Also his name I feel should be Mike.  Mike Eppler.  I'm okay with that.  His name is Billy.  Could be worse but definitely could be better, too.  Huh?  Oh, right.  Fourth paragraph of the act.  Maybe take a shower instead of a bath today to impress Nurse.  She would have no idea whether I'm taking a bath or a shower.  Not CONSCIOUSLY.  But she might pick it up unconsciously with special superpowers.  I don't know what kind of superpowers this person may or may not have.  In all honesty SHE probably doesn't even know either!  Better just to play it safe and take a shower.
     Last paragraph of the act.  Anyway.  Two thirds into Fall.  That's okay.  I feel comfortable with that.  It HAS been Fall for a while!  But there SHOULD be another four or so more weeks per my general feelings.  Amazing.  Whatta great riff.  Inside I believe and feel that time passes at the rate it is passing.  What else is going on.  Gonna have a Raspberry Patriotism Fact next act!  I can't wait to see what it is and whether or not I believe it.  Gotta imagine Raspberry's aren't happy with being a family friendly term for Farting.  They gotta be like WHAT THE HELL HOW DID WE GET ROPED INTO THIS DISGUSTING CONNOTATION.  We have NOTHING to do with farting HOW THE HELL ARE YOU PUTTING THIS ON US.  That's how I would feel is I was a Raspberry.  THAT and Nothing.  They don't feel things.  Probably.  My best guess is they feel nothing.  Hey great time for a Cleansing Exercise.

That's One Way To Put It

    Hey!  Took a bath and no one is the wiser.  Except for you.  And me.  And maybe some other people.  The point is whatta joy to write last five paragraphs.  IT'S HARD.  I've already accomplished 15 paragraphs.  Why isn't that enough for you people.  What difference is another 5 paragraphs gonna make to anyone.  Other than giving me problems.  Gives you four more minutes to read stuff.  Five paragraphs = 4 minutes.  Let's talk about it!  Anyway Hey another week starts tomorrow.  Wonder what will happen this week.  It could be anything!  The same stuff as LAST WEEK.  The same stuff as NEXT WEEK.  Those are my main two best guesses.  Not bad guesses at all!  Also when I say NEXT WEEK I mean the week after upcoming week.  Of COURSE what happens upcoming week will be the same as what happens upcoming week.  They are the same thing!  WHAT A PARAGRAPH.  I'm glad I spent .8 of a minute on it or so.  I don't know math that well.
     Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- There are more chickens than people in the world.  So what.  That doesn't shock me.  I woulda guessed there's lots of chickens out there!  Now if you told me there were more RACCOONS than people that might surprise me.  Chickens?  Especially the way we mass produce them?  Sure makes tons of sense.  We don't eat Raccoons.  Maybe we should.  I feel like Raccoons are our enemies.  Just got some deja vu.  I was about to launch into a 4 sentence bit about how I don't trust raccoons and feel that they are actively against us.  But maybe I wrote that before?  That's a tough one.  It FEELS like I wrote Raccoons Being Enemies Before but also when would that have come up.  Either way the point remains!  Raccoons aren't indifferent with us they're against us and we're against them and that's just how it is!  Hey coffee time.
     Coffee Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- No such thing.  Only thing I can think of is Coffee continues to be delicious.  There's a scoop for ya!  Guess I'll shave tonight.  I like the part where I feel like I accomplished something at the end.  You'd be surprised how rare it is that I feel I accomplished something.  Mostly based on the rarity of me accomplishing anything.  The point is Great.  I was assuming it'd be a given that next week I go back to Lemon Tea Snapple after experimenting with Raspberry, even if I liked the Raspberry just fine.  Ya know what?  NOT A GIVEN.  Raspberry is GOOD.  Look in an ideal world I'd get both.  But I can't justify it to my parents!  My birthday is not for another 3 weeks.  Maybe then I can say it's my birthday present.  But I gotta just keep that in my back pocket for now.  Always was told don't keep things in your back pocket.  Easier for them to be stolen.  I keep things in my back pockets all the time.  Never been stolen from!  Shows how much they know.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Amazing.  Could make sitting less comfortable but that's a whole different issue.  I just realized I haven't taken public transportation in over 18 months.  What The Hell.  I wanna ride the bus sure.  But REALLY get me on the Long Island Rail Road.  Now THAT'S something I wanna be doing for my birthday.  Can't do it not safe.  DAMNIT.  Also imagine if I was going TO AND FROM some place worthwhile.  That not only am I riding the train but I can justify it with yeah I'm actually doing this FOR ANOTHER REASON TOO.  That's the dream!  Amazing.  Non-LIRR Train?  If we're talking Standard Subway Train?  Depends on the line.  Some lines I'd be into, some lines I can do without.  Amazing.  TV keeps showing Christmas Movies now.  My impression is at some point they decided people spend more money all year round when they always think it's a Special Holiday.  Not sure how or why.  But if it's always a holiday people are primed to watch commercials and buy the products and services of the commercials.  Go figure.
     Last paragraph of the day.  I WAS A FOOL for falling for it for Halloween.  I like Horror themed entertainment so I bought in hook line and/or sinker!  But now I see they're up to no good!  What else is going on.  Well maybe this is just that there's a lot of Fun Special Holidays grouped up these months.  What are they gonna do in January that's Holiday Themed.  I DUNNO MARTIN LUTHER KING DAY.  EVER THINK OF THAT.  Maybe you have.  I don't know what you think about.  HAH.  I googled Martin Luther King Day to confirm it's in January (it is) but one of the questions that Google has answered is, "What day is Martin Luther King's birthday in 2022?"  I'm gonna make a wild guess and say the same day as last year.  Wonderful.  Hey the entry is over!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:21 P.M.

Saturday, November 20, 2021 

Keep Doing What You're Doing

    Hi friends!  Saturday entry.  You know what that means.  Tell me what it means.  I don't know.  I'd like to know!  I know you can't tell me RIGHT NOW it's too soon.  But if I can know by Next Week that'll be fine.  The point is my regular glass glasses for beverages are unclean!  Gotta use glasses from the same set but that are taller.  DISGUSTING.  Also the point is White Teenager Murderer is allowed to keep murdering.  Will he keep murdering?  Will he call it quits after one successful murder rampage?  Only time will tell.  The important thing is IT'S PROVOCATIVE.  I really dunno what to say about it.  I wanna protest about it but I feel White Privilege because there's less a chance I'd get killed by doing it.  Also don't know where and when.  Also today's not good for me.  Also I'M SO SORRY. 
    The thing I feel is that yes it's a huge dangerous step backwards that will have immediate ramifications.  BUT I feel if Trump was president this week that alone would be 10x worse immediate ramifications.  A world with No court case but Trump being president would inspire 10x as much violence!  So let's keep up Him Not Being President.  So far so good!  Anyway TIME FOR SOME LAUGHS.  Have you heard the deal with.. uh... you know.  The thing everyone's talking about that is funny.  OH RIGHT.  That audio clip of the word where some people hear one thing and other people hear the other thing.  That was from this week, right?  I HEARD THE SECOND THING.  Get off my back about it!  I feel like that technology could be used for evil.  Figure out a way to broadcast the exact same audio but some people hear one thing and others hear another.  Maybe it could be used For Good, too!  My mind goes straight to Evil.  Oh well.  I don't know if it was technology that caused the disputation.  Just the nature of sound and the human processing of sound.  Oh well I'm sure we can still use those base elements for evil.
     Yeah!  Kinda feel like someone should Jack Ruby White Teenage Murderer?  Not me.  I have too much to live for.  Maybe someone who doesn't care as much about their upcoming life prospects.  Also I don't know how to kill someone.  Buy a gun and use it is the first thing that comes to mind.  But I'm not sure I wanna do that.  No good alternatives, though.  Hit him really hard in the gut.  That's what killed Houdini.  I don't possess that much natural strength.  Not yet at least.  Hmm.  Anyway.  Thanksgiving weekend is coming up.  I will celebrate by Continuing To Live.  That's the plan at least.  No guarantees though.  Maybe we can get White Teenager Murder on his taxes.  That's how we got Al Capone.  This guy is doing tax evasions or cheats or SOMETHIN'.  Hey great idea lets look into that one.
     What else is going on.  Started coffee before walk #1 instead of after because my mom wanted some.  Amazing.  What a story!  What a scoop!  I scooped coffee grounds into coffee filter 8 times.  So many scoops.  What else is going on.  My mom wants me to order more T-Shirts.  Specifically T-Shirts advertising bands I like.  She was very clear about that.  I've got lots of t-shirts.  I don't know what her preoccupation is with me getting more t-shirts.  And is she right that I'd like to advertise bands I'd like with my clothing?  YES.  But that's just a lucky guess.  Anyway.  Gotta imagine licensed band t-shirts get some money to the bands.  That's good for them.  I root for them as people because I like the music they made for me.  More money = better life for them as people.  Crunched the numbers and everything.  Also do the bands I like have to wear Michael Shirts?  No.  But it couldn't hurt!
     Yeah!  What else.  Gotta license some Michael Shirts.  Otherwise I'm getting nothing out of the deal.  Anyway.  White privilege in protesting will only get you so far.  If I'm protesting with minorities I'm Clearly A Threat To People Stalking Us Also.  ALRIGHT I got some skin in the game!  Sounds like fun.  From the safety of Not Actually Protesting.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine if this inspires 10 more similar cases over the next month a solid HALF OF THEM will result in guilty verdicts.  So it's not all that bad!  I HAVE FAITH sometimes murderers will be held accountable for murder.  Wow whatta deal.  What else is going on.  Coffee in a minute.  Hey great I like that.  It'll feel good going down my gullet.  Anyway.  I think Trump caught a lot of unfair flack with that There were good people on both sides quote about Nazi protestors and Non Nazi protestors.  He could have easily said There Were Good People On ONE Side.  Hey coffee time.
     Hey what's going on.  More paragraphs time!  The Man From The Ten Rings is hosting Saturday Night Live tonight!  Wonderful.  I hope he brought his prop rings.  I don't think the rings were his in the movie.  At least not most of the time.  Gotta imagine he gets them rings at some point he's the star.  Rings belong with the star.  Rings aren't on stars they're on planets like SATURN.  Maybe some stars have rings.  They're stars they can do whatever they want.  The point is LIU?  I've known people with that last name before in my life.  Also I know of the word LIEUTENANT.  That's when he's in an apartment building.  What else is going on.  Are people in America allowed to feel threatened and kill Asian people.  Gonna have to look into that one.  I don't think there's precedent one way or another on that specifically yet.
     Sure.  I have enough t-shirts.  I want some Adult Shirts.  I don't think that's too much to ask.  Hmm better explicitly ask it.  If I don't make my feelings known then no one will know how I really feel.  Yep.  If I were a Guns Person I'd be against guns rights.  I'd be like okay the rule should be everyone who has a gun can keep them but then no one else can get new guns.  Because then they'd have all the guns and we'd be locked out.  Which I'm guessing will come into play heavily over the upcoming years.  It's good to have plans.  What else is going on.  Seventh paragraph.  There must be some gun laying around somewhere.  If not in my house then maybe within a 50 feet radius.  Someone left a gun laying around somewhere.  I just gotta go out there and retrieve it.  Great.  Anyway.  Or I can build a weapon more powerful than a gun.  Off the top of my head some sort of bayonet that only acts as a Sticking Thing and not a gun.  Good luck avoiding getting stuck that's all I can say.
     I must talk about my Mom wanting me to get new t-shirts advertising bands every two months.  Because she brings it up every two months.  And it's always a story for some reason.  Hmm.  I guess that's some Baseline in her thinking.  Every now and then she defaults towards MICHAEL NEEDS T-SHIRTS.  HE LIKES MUSIC.  MICHAEL NEEDS BAND T-SHIRTS.  In which case I dunno but I don't think I like what's going on in her head exactly.  Oh well that's her problem.  What else is going on.  Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Amazing!  Also I'm a pussy but gotta imagine that if people keep killing people the people being killed will fight back at some point?  So we got that to look forward to.  Alright!  What else is going on.  CAN'T WE JUST GET EVERYONE T-SHIRTS.  That will unite everyone.  T-Shirts!  Of bands Michael Likes.  Or maybe Michael T-Shirts.  Better license some Michael T-Shirts QUICK before everyone starts getting them.  I can be coming out of this scenario WAY ON TOP with everyone wearing a Michael T-Shirt.
     Ninth paragraph.  What else is going on.  Not sure anybody wants t-shirts.  We've already established even I-- the target demographic for t-shirts-- don't want any more t-shirts.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  Anyway.  Get everyone regular adult shirts.  It's more expensive but I think everyone would be very happy with that.  Whose paying for this.  I think it's part of Build Back Better.  Oh okay.  I don't want to unite everyone.  I don't want Teenage White Murderers to get free shirts.  FUCK them.  Anyway what else is going on.  Nurse coming into house tomorrow to give my Dad blood infusion.  Great.  I'll think about wearing my mask every time I come downstairs, sure.  I'm a considerate guy half the time.  They don't infuse blood into him.  They infuse antibodies or something.  To COMPLIMENT his blood.  I don't have all the details.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful I guess.  New Mets GM was INTRODUCED in a video press conference.  I watched some of it.  He was all like hey my philosophy GET the good players.  Then I turned it off.  And moved on with my life!  Then I read the synopsis later.  Then I moved on with my life again.  Then I read more detailed synopsis.  Then moved on more with lives.  Huh.  What else is going on.  T-shirt that says Build Back Better on the back.  Some sort of pun.  That t-shirt will get you killed.  Oh well it was worth it!  What else is going on.  Getting to the end of November!  If I made a big deal about November 10 being the middle of November then I can make an equally big deal about November 20th being the end.  I dunno.  November 21st might be the analogous date.  The point is this paragraph is over.  I'll be back in a little bit.

What A Nice Thing To Say

    Hello friends.  Time to write some more!  Any more updates on New Mets G.M.  I started tuning out when they said he was a, "Straight Up Guy."  That's all I needed to hear!  Anyway what else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Olympics is going on soon.  I feel like America has a pretty good track record of beating competing world powers in Olympics.  We beat Germany with Jesse Owens.  We beat Russia with The Miracle On Ice.  Now we have to beat OURSELVES BECAUSE WE'RE OUR OWN WORST ENEMY.  Hmm that's gonna be tough.  I guess just be a no show for every event.  If we don't play we cannot win!  And if we don't win WE WIN.  Also gotta imagine in Germany they were like hey we won these OTHER events in 1936 so WE'RE THE BEST.  And Russia feels the same way in 1080.  We focus on the ones we win like they were the ones that matter.  There were SEVERAL other events that the other side won!
     Probably.  That'd be my guess.  I'm gonna go out of my way to start the process of getting New Adult Shirts.  What a great idea. Why didn't I think of this sooner.  Too busy being a child.  You wear the shirts of a teenager you think like a teenager.  My mom got me an adult shirt last week?  Starting to think like an adult!  And my first thought is GET MORE ADULT SHIRTS so I'll think like an adult EVEN MORE.  Then look at the lay of the land from there and play it how I see fit.  Hmm.  Are there adult pants I should be wearing.  I'm gonna have to look into that one.   Maybe some sort of Adult Headband.  Hmm.  I was saying it idly without thinking before, but really, what are the odds this White Teenager Murderer kills more people.  10-20% off the top of my head.  Why not!  Worked out for him great.  And then maybe this time he doesn't get away with it!  That's still not a good scenario.  Yeah he may face consequences the second time but it also means MORE PEOPLE DEAD.  Forgot about that.  That's the main part!
     Third paragraph of the act.  Is new Mets GM STILL a straight up guy?  I'm checking the official Mets website every 15 minutes for an update.  I need either confirmation or a disputing account.  What else is going on.  Gonna take a bath in maybe half an hour.  Might have to wait a little bit of time between Act and Bath if I'm not done by then.  Dad just finished his shower!  WATER MUST WAIT TO GET HOT.  Something along those lines.  Anyway looking forward to Raspberry Snapple with Act III.  It's going to, "Hit," the, "Spot."  I feel like if I get socks that are any more adult they'd be elderly people socks.  Not interested in that.  I'm okay with a Young Man's Socks.  TODAY IS JOE BIDEN'S BIRTHDAY.  I don't have his address but if I did I'd gift him some Young Men's Socks.  Either for practical reasons because he might like them or as some sort of Gag Gift.  I know his address.  It's THE WHITE HOUSE.
     Penultimate paragraph.  Whether it's practical gift or gag gift I think he might GET A KICK OUT OF THEM.  Pun.  Socks go on feet.  Feet kick things.  That's their primary directive!  Moving on.  Gotta imagine there's such a thing as Presidential Socks.  And presidents wear some sort of special socks that we don't even know about because we never see presidents without their shoes on.  Hmm gotta know more about these socks.  Do some sort of Da Vinci Code adventure to get to the bottom of President Socks.  Anyway what else is going on.  I feel like when I was younger, as a kid, teenager, and even in my 20's, I enjoyed wearing shoes with no socks.  I don't know what I was getting out of it.  I just felt like I was getting away with something by going out and about in the world each day sockless.  These days that doesn't appeal to me.  Haven't even thought about the possibility lately to be honest.  But IN THE PAST it was definitely a thing.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  What else is going on.  Chewing some gum now!  Not sure why I had the impulse.  But I am and I'm enjoying it.  I don't CARE that 2 pieces is roughly 5 calories.  I CAN AFFORD IT.  The benefits are outweighing the... non-benefits.  Hmm.  I told my Mom how I felt about Shirts and she said okay pick out one or two shirts.  I don't know what that means.  Pick the mout WHERE.  We're not at THE GAP.  I'm in my house that doesn't sell any shirts at all.  Look maybe she knows some great Shirt Website that she's talking about, sure, I get it.  But I DON'T know the website.  She can't assume I know where to get shirts from.  That's asking FAR TOO MUCH from me.  What else is going on.  Also I need her help picking out good Adult Shirts.  I know nothing about shirts at all and wouldn't know where to begin.  Anyway that's it for this act.  Be back soon.

Right Back At Ya

    Hello friends.  National Food Day Of The Day-- National Peanut Butter Fudge Day.  Leave me out of it!  I don't want peanut butter.  If you're celebrating this day by enjoying some peanut butter fudge DON'T INVITE ME.  I don't even wanna hear the words Peanut Butter.  I can type them because I can't hear what I type.  My senses don't work that way!  But the point is what else is going on.  For some reason the only thing more gross to me than peanut butter is peanut butter combined with anything else.  I think it's because I would want fudge under other circumstances.  Now peanut butter isn't just gross by itself but IT'S RUINING THINGS I WOULD WANT.  It's ACTIVELY making my life worse and I don't like it!  Also can we blame George Washington Carver for Peanut Butter.  Gonna have to LTURQ.  HEY SOME GUY NAMED JOHN HARVEY KELLOGG invented peanut butter.  I wonder if he's Kellogg of Cereal Fame.  Let's LTURQ!  YEP.  So he did a negative thing with peanut butter but is that cancelled out with doing a positive thing with breakfast cereal?  That's a tough one.  Moving on.
     Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Some bears build nests in trees to sunbathe and rest.  Wonderful!  Hilarious image!  Bear in a hammock.  That's not what a hammock is.  Close enough!  I'm imagining a bear in a hammock and nobody can take that away from me ever.  Anyway what else is going on.  Apparently Kellogg was some religious fanatic and racist.  Should I have put Racist before Religious Fanatic.  Which one is more important to who he is.  He'd probably prefer being known for his religious fanaticism.  But what he would prefer isn't our problem!  Anyway what else is going on.  I'm sure at the time people would describe Kellogg as, "A Straight Up Guy."  Anyway what else is going on.  I've said, "What Else Is Going On," seventeen times this paragraph alone.  I mean it!  That's the theme of the paragraph.  What Else Is Going On.  I got coffee on the mind.  It's coming in POSSIBLY THE END OF THIS SENTENCE.  Do I feel that Corn Flakes and Milk should be separate but equal?  Yeah!  Kind of!  But not equal.  Milk is separate and UNEQUAL.  Don't want milk PERSONAL PREFERENCE.
     Am I implying that the new Mets GM is a racist and religious fanatic?  NO OF COURSE NOT.  I'm just saying WE DON'T KNOW and he easily MIGHT BE.  What else is going on.  What do I got in store for the rest of the day.  Pretty decent sized break between Entry and Next Walk.  I can accomplish a lot with that.  Like calibrating what to do with the day after that.  That calibration should take up a lot of time.  HEY I can watch All The Expendables.  Recorded them from Live TV this week.  Gotta imagine I'll either enjoy those or not enjoy them.  I've narrowed it down to those two things.  It's a TRUE Narrow down though.  Other things I can REALLY enjoy or REALLY not enjoy.  I think with this franchise I will either not enjoy them or enjoy them.  I feel somewhat strongly about this!  Strong enough that I don't really feel strongly about it but I apparently felt strongly enough about it that it occurred to me enough to say it in this paragraph.
     Penultimate paragraph of the day!  I don't believe it.  I accomplished As Of Now 18 paragraphs.  Cool!  Down to the last episode of Tales From That Crypt in current binge-watching-it-in-order.  Don't wanna watch it!  The only one that truly scares me.  It's animated retelling of The Three Little Pigs and No Spoilers but let's just say the way things turn out over the course of the episode upset me!  Then again what else is going on.  Why the pigs gotta be little.  What does that add to the story.  Why you gotta kick a pig when he's down.  Anyway.  Also these pigs are industrious building their own houses.  Good for them.  I bet it works out for a solid At Least 33% Of Them.  Ugh.  Having a racist GM would be TERRIBLE.  Lots of baseball players aren't white.  We're stuck with an all white team we are gonna lose a solid At Least 33% of The Time.  Huh.  Time for only one more paragraph to go! 
     Great.  What else is going on.  Maybe shave tomorrow night.  I wanted to set a routine to do it every week standard.  Maybe I wanna stick with that routine, maybe I don't!  More like I DO want to stick with that routine but maybe FOR BAD REASONS I DON'T FULLY UNDERSTAND I will end up NOT sticking with that routine.  That sums my life up for now.  The house passed Build Back Better!  I assume the next thing they'll work on is Build Front Better.  And then work their way to the Sides.  Hmm.  Did I already make that joke with the t-shirt thing where I said the back of the t-shirt was Build Back Better.  Might have made a I bet the t-shirt says Build Front Better on the front! clever witticism.  Either way hey the entry is just about over.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-1:01 P.M.

Friday, November 19, 2021 

Some Of This Is New

    Hello friends.  Friday morning.  Act I can be interrupted by Super Market Delivery arriving!  Which is good news because I get to get the things I asked for from Super Market.  That'll solidly be 60% of what I eat this week. 95% if we include soda.  Let's include soda.  It's fun!  Anyway down to Just Water to drink today before Super Market order arrives.  Other than coffee.  And a tiny bit amount of artificial sweetener cranberry juice.  To mix with water!  Okay I think we got all the important and funny stuff out of the way.  Now the rest of the entry is gonna be a snooze.  Did some CircleWalking last night.  My stomach was cramping up on me and I didn't wanna get halfway across the neighborhood and unable to walk completely.  So I made an Executive Decision to just walk in my room.  Finish that Chinese American Marvel Movie.  Good stuff!  I presume.  It got good reviews so it must have been good.  Personally I found it kind of boring!
   Yeah there's ten rings.  WE GET IT.  Enough with these ten rings!  It's funny because the ten rings aren't that big a deal in the movie.  That's not funny.  You gotta see the movie to get it.  No you don't.  Leave me alone stop saying I'm not funny IT'S RUDE.  What else is going on.  Another week in the books.  History books presumably.  Not math textbooks.  I didn't accomplish that much math this week.  Sure we did.  95% with soda.  That's true.  Didn't think of that.  Also Ten rings kinda not the biggest story in the movie.  Math!  10 is a number.  I guess.  I think all textbooks are a scam because they're hard covered.  Make em light covered and save money!  Some textbooks are light covered.  Yeah but those are the exception that prove the rules.  Some textbooks are just photocopied pages stapled with Super Professional Stapler.  I wanna get me one of those staplers.  That can staple like 80 pages.  I feel I'd be Unstoppable with that powerful a stapler.
     My dad may have one of those staplers.  I feel like if he did I would have seen it around by now.  But he's a teacher.  And used to be a Live In Person Teacher.  Who may or may not give made up 80 page textbooks.  Hmm.  Also not sure why we need staple removers.  God intended these things to be stapled.  If he didn't want them stapled he wouldn't of had us staple them.  You're messing with nature!  Also it's fun to undo staples yourself with your fingers.  You're missing out on a lot of fun.  Then again Is It Fun to use staple remover?  Yes, possibly.  It's been a while.  What else is going on.  I can have whatever I want for lunch from Super Market.  That rarely happens.  For some reason I usually have a lunch leftover from the day before.  Not today!  I can have A SANDWICH.  I can have A DIFFERENT SANDWICH. I can have SOME SORT OF CHICKEN DISH.  No spoilers.  That's all lunch talk you're getting out of me!
    I feel like I've relaxed my anti-meal talk rules lately and the quality of my work has been thusly suffering.  Oh well there's always tomorrow to turn it all around.  Until the last day.  Then there's no tomorrow.  Unless we loop back to the first day.  Not a fan of that.  It takes PLENTY of days after The First Day for me to show up at all.  I'd be really bored Being Nothing And Nowhere for quite a long time!  Hey that's life I guess.  Trying out Raspberry Snapple.  One thing I thought of is maybe they have all brand new facts.  Maybe they're divided by Snapple Flavor.  One can only hope.  Also this time around NO ANIMAL FACTS.  Bored of 'em!  I want another subject to learn about you idiots.  Also the more we know about animals the harder it is to assert Dominion over them.  I don't wanna be second guessing my Dominion Assertion over the rest of nature!
     Then again, a lot of these facts make me like the animals even less.  So it's easier for me to not care about the Health, Safety, and Preservation of their species.  Sounds good to me.  HEY looks like I got Booster Shot Appointment Tuesday Morning.  Within walking distance!  I'm gonna WALK THERE.  Be there for a while.  WALK BACK.  Unless my Dad wants to drive me.  I think he does.  Combine it with Laundromat Drop Off.  Oh well there goes my walking plans.  What else is going on.  My favorite parts of Ten Rings movie is when it reminds us we're still in Marvel Universe.  OH RIGHT THIS IS LIKE THE THING FROM THE OTHER MOVIES.  WONDERFUL.  I LIKE BEING REMINDED OF THINGS I KNOW.  Wonderful.  A lot more convenient than being reminded of things I don't know.  Easier to Know About It.  Hey here comes coffee.
     Yeah!  Got coffee going but no good complimentary cold beverage.  Am I using the word complimentary right?  Possibly!  I know one definition of it that means I'm using it WRONG.  But it might have another definition that means I'm also using it RIGHT.  No way of knowing.  Let's ask The Guy With The Ten Rings.  The rings give him power.  That's about as much as I got.  Oh super powers or something.  Or maybe not quite super powers but definitely MUCH MORE POWER than without them.  Anyway what else is going on.  I think the rings go over this guy's wrists.  Not his fingers.  Not really rings then.  More like wrist bands.  Also they all say WWLAD.  What Would Lance Armstrong Do.  It's a wristband joke you wouldn't understand.  Also Lance Armstrong would either bicycle race, get cancer, or do steroids.  I feel like I don't know if Any Of Those Three are accurate 100%, but I'm PRETTY SURE 2 out of 3 are accurate.
     Wonderful.  Looks like President Biden is getting a colonoscopy.  I think technically if someone is sticking a camera up the president's butt, that person technically becomes president for that period of time.  It's in the constitution somehow.  They didn't know about cameras.  Ben Franklin did.  He saw 'em coming.  Just didn't tell anyone.  Ben Franklin didn't write the constitution.  Neither did you get off his case about it.  What else is going on.  Seventh paragraph.  Based on updates, it looks like we'll be getting Super Market delivery on the early end of the estimated time.  Which is good!  Means I don't have to waste so much time waiting around for it to get here.  I WIN in this scenario.  Also many other scenarios.  I feel like in all the scenarios I'm going through over the next few weeks I WIN in roughly 65, 70% of them.  Because I tend to go into scenarios I'm more likely to win.  That's why it's significantly more than 50%.  STRATEGY.
     Eighth paragraph.  Not sure I did the right thing with this Snapple Mix-em-up.  They might surprise me and it turns out great.  We'll see!  Looks like Teenager Murderer Trial Jury is still deliberating.  Good!  That means there's at least one guy whose like Actually Kinda MAYBE This guy is guilty???  Or they're just shooing the breeze for four days.  Maybe that's the case.  I wanna shoot The Breeze.  Sounds like a nice casual drug.  That you inject.  Most injection drugs aren't casual but Serious.  I want a casual Injection Drug.  I think I'm entitled to as much!  Also if I wanna share needles that's MY business.  It could work out to my advantage!  Maybe last guy who used the needle somehow left over some of his drug in it.  Now I'm getting BONUS drug.  See I thought this through and I know what I'm doing.  I may not know how drug needles work.  That's okay I don't know how non-drug needles work either. 
     Ninth paragraph.  I defeated Stomach Cramps pretty well.  They don't exist anymore!  Looks like I'm coming out on top in this scenario.  Good 1 for 1 in scenarios since I started talking about them 2 or 3 paragraphs ago.  Starting off pretty good!  What else is going on.  I have thoughts on today's lunch and reflections on yesterday's lunch.  But NOPE!  I'm done with lunch talk.  That's just how it is.  The Mets signed their GM to a four year contract.  That's a lot of years!  The highest length contract I was ever signed to was let's just see how it goes.  What else is going on.  I like when you're in 5th grade and writing 2 page essays and you have to staple them.  Lots of stapling 2 page papers in 4th-6th grade.  It's IMPORTANT.  Otherwise these papers would get mixed up!  That sort of thing.  Also they're one page and a fifth maybe.  You don't even hit a third of filling up the second page.  That adds to the egregiousness!
    Wonderful.  Looks like Building Back Betterish just passed the house!  Wonderful.  That's way more times than I've ever passed the house.  NEVER.  Maybe I have.  They've passed lots of things in their history.  I know a tiny fraction of a fraction of a fraction of things they've passed.  Anyway what else is going on.  Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Also I'm assuming the House big room amphitheater doubles as a planetarium.  That's what I would do.  Trippy.  A lot of parts of that sentence might be wrong.  Hmm.  Is it assigned seating In House or can you sit wherever you want.  And if it is assigned seating do you have input on your seat.  My guess is Standard Seats For Everyone but maybe you can request to sit next to your friends.  That's how I would do things.  Anyway I'll be back later.

I See How It Is

    Hey!  Super Market delivered 85% of the order!  The other 15%, one bagsworth, got separated At Plant and will be here within a few hours hopefully.  But I can accept that at my leisure because nothing there has to be immediately Fridgerated or 'Reezered.  I couldn't say the, "F," in, "Freezer."  Takes too much time.  Anyway I'm drinking Raspberry Snapple and it's delicious!  Didn't even to think to look At Fact because I enjoy it so much.  And I don't wanna ruin these good vibes.  Oh well I HAVE TO check it out.  Let's see.  Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Tennis was originally played with bare hands.  Hmm.  Good!  GOOD!  I LIKE THAT FACT.  I have good feelings about it.  Not animal related.  Not a repeat.  Makes ya THINK.  Makes ya LAUGH.  Makes ya feel good about life.  THERE'S A PARAGRAPH FOR YA.
     Wonderful.  I assume they mean that they were bouncing a tennis-esque ball back and forth by swatting it with their hands.  And not hitting a disembodied hand back and forth with tennis rackets.  No bounce to a disembodied hand.  How would that work.  MAKE their bounce to it.  Load it up with springs or something, I dunno!  You're the Sports Physicist!  What else is going on.  No stomach cramps today yet!  I WIN AGAIN.  Movie about Tennis SuperStar Father of tennis superstar ladies Their Dad.  Behind every great woman is a great man.  .5 Of a great man.  One great man behind 2 great women on average.  Wonderful.  Will Smith is a good guy in fact and fiction but I wonder if this movie shows that the father pushed them too far.  Probably!  I wouldn't wanna be pushed that far such that I become the best person in the world at something.  WAY too far to be pushed.  Oh well that's life.
     Yeah!  What I got out of this Fact is that the tennis racket business is a racket.  We could be doing all this without buying rackets.  Scam!  It's all a scam.  Gotta figure 40-60% of life Is A Scam.  Whether you think it's 40% or whether you think it's 60% says a lot about you and the differences between us.  Hmm.  Not sure where I fall.  I JUST TOLD YOU where I fall.  I Figure it's between 40-60%.  That's what I said and I'm gonna stick with it.  I'm estimating that and not narrowing it down.  GET ON BOARD.  I think being a GM for a big market sports team is EASY.  Hmm should I throw money at this exciting marquee free agent player?  YEAH SURE WHY NOT.  Couldn't HURT.  GREAT G.M. is the coverage he'll get in the newspaper the next day.  Easy.  What an easy job.  Just sign as many people as possible and see what happens.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Didn't have to wait very long between Act I and Super Market delivery.  Maybe 30, 35 minutes.  Wasn't so bad.  Got to read up on Building Back Better act.  Good for people who use insulin!  Damn it!  Now I wanna use some insulin.  What's good for the geese is good for the gander.  Hook me up with that discounted insulin!  Anyway it just occurred to me I'm relatively exposed to Covid-19 for the next several days until Booster Shot.  OH NO.  Gotta be extra careful.  No open mouth kissing strangers on the street.  Only CLOSED mouth kissing.  WE gotta play it safe!  Only quick respectful Hello how are you doing nice day isn't it pecks.  What else is going on.  HEY Missing Bag just arrived from Super Market.  Delicious!
     Last paragraph before Bathing Exercise.  So I got that going for me.  Look this snapple taste berryish but it's not STRONG and IN YOUR FACE about it.  Light berry taste.  Somewhat subtle.  I enjoy it!  What else is delicious.  Maybe that's why I find life pretty tolerable these days.  I eat the same amount of times as anyone else and I'm always feeling hey this is delicious!  Way more than the rest of you idiots who just shove food down your gullet without even thinking about it.  Probably thinking about your REAL Life instead.  What a chump!  Not only are you Having A Real Life but you're wasting all your time THINKING about it.  I pity you.  Hmm it's gonna take a lot of watching TV over the course of the weekend to build up a Real Life Of My Own.  Gonna have to put in THE TIME to get there.  Anyway.  Bath time.  Be back soon.

Let's Move On With My Lives

    Hey!  Time to write the last few paragraphs.  I can do that.  Probably!  The point is what parts of Build Back Better effect me ultra-personally.  Climate Change stuff?  That effects me!  Sounds good.  CASE CLOSED.  One day I hope to have kids and they can go to Universal Pre K if they want to.  Or they can take a year off to travel to Europe.  I'm gonna be very open minded in letting my kids make CHOICES for THEMSELVES.  What else is going on.  Also with the Climate Change Stuff there should STILL BE A EUROPE by the time I have kids.  In 200 years.  When I'm a cyborg.  Figure I'll figure out Women enough by 200 years from now.  Especially what with being a cyborg for a significant amount of that time!  Huh.  Good public transportation stuff in BBB.  YES!  Now we're talking my language.  We were before too but it didn't feel like the right time to explicitly point that out.  Snapple #2 a-comin'!  The point is in K-12 you legally have to go to school, right?  Gotta imagine Pre-K will be Parents' Choice.
    Wonderful.  Raspberry Patriotism Fact Of The Day #2-- Heat, not sunlight, ripens tomatoes.  Hmm.  Good.  I'm glad.  Wonderful.  What else is going on.  NATIONAL FOOD DAYS.  What's The National Food for today.  National Carbonated Beverage With Caffeine Day.  NOW WE'RE TALKIN.  This is the day I WAS BORN FOR.  This and my birthday.  But MAINLY THIS.  Anyway I lost enthusiasm quickly over the course of seven seconds.  Because I had a huge Crash and was like well this means nothing.  I like soda a lot but in the end Who Cares.  Life is pointless.  Might as well end it all right now.  Or, if not now, later.  At a time of the universe's choosing which doesn't rely on me participating in Ending My Life actively at all.  That's my plan for dying.  NOT ACTIVELY CAUSING IT MYSELF.  I hope that works out.  Hey coffee time.
     Hey great what else.  Not sure what to do with today.  Pretty sure I can do something.  There's literally dozens of things in the world that CAN be done.  Start working on cyborg technology so that I'm more comfortable with the ladies.  As a cyborg.  Regular ladies.  Not cyborg ladies.  Although I guess if I'm a cyborg man I can't be upset about getting with a cyborg lady-- only fair!  What else is going on.  As long as they're a cyborg WHERE IT COUNTS.  Or NOT a cyborg where it counts.  I lost track of what's good and where it counts.  Hmm.  It's a good thing we're not celebrating carbonated beverage WITHOUT caffeine today.  Why should they be celebrated.  Either caffeined or nothing!  That's what I always say.  Starting now.  Never said it before.  But there's gotta be a first time for everything!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Everyone knows one of the toughest parts with making a good cyborg is the back of the torso.  We gotta build backs better.  That was necessary to say.  VERY necessary.  What else is going on.  Not a lot of good Thanksgiving movies.  Can't even think of one off the top of my head.  Seems like a pretty big oversight.  Thanksgiving is a holiday that people get a kick out of and people also get kicks out of watching movies and they REALLY get a kick out of watching movies about holidays they get kicks out of.  The point is Die Hard 7 could be set at Thanksgiving and people can debate whether that's a Thanksgiving movie.  Everyone wins.  Holiday People.  Movie people.  NERDS.  Bruce Willis.  The Number SEVEN.  Also a portion of the gross revenue of the film goes towards American Indian Tribes.  So they get a little something out of the deal, too!  The point is that's a paragraph.
     Last paragraph of the day.  I don't believe it.  All I had to do was write 19 paragraphs up until this point.  Of which roughly 40% was relatively new stuff.  WOW.  We're talking TWO OUT OF FIVE THINGS.  When you put it that way that's a lot of relatively new stuff.  Sure.  As of today Cleveland Baseball Team are officially Cleveland Guardians.  ABOUT TIME.  WE NEED SOME GUARDIANS.  I DON'T CARE IF THEY'RE FROM CLEVELAND OR IF THEY PLAY BASEBALL OR WHAT.  That's THEIR business.  As long as they guardian us that's what's important.  What else is going on to close up this entry.  Apparently there was a roller derby team named The Cleveland Guardians and they settled in Court their differences.  But the point is they weren't guardianing us at all.  I think I would have known if a Roller Derby Team was guardining us.  So THANK GOD they're being usurped by this major league baseball team.  Anyway.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:47 P.M.

Thursday, November 18, 2021 

It's Not What You Think

    Hello friends.  Just got back from having blood work done.  Had blood pressure taken!  Low blood pressure.  Great!  My heart is saving its energy for when it really needs it.  Then when I need high blood pressure in key high stress situations I'll have it all saved up.  Anyway I'm running out of soda so both snapples for the day will happen this entry.  Snapple Patriotism Fact #1-- A Group of Jellyfish is called a smack.  Great.  I don't care.  Let's move on with our lives!  Also a group of jellyfish is called Jellyfish.  I JUST saw you do it.  Don't try to deny it!  It's all right there in black and white!  The words are in black.  The background of the Snapple Cap is in white.  Anyway that's an alternate Rick James/Charlie Murphy confrontation.  What's a group of jelly fish called.  What.  SMACK.  Someone get Dead Rick James and Dead Charlie Murphy on the phone!  Rick James may be alive.  Nope they're both dead.  Guess that smacking really took something out of BOTH of them.
     Anyway.  A bit behind schedule because of Blood Work but I'll survive.  Presumably.  All signs point to me surviving this.  Might be trying RASPBERRY Snapple next week instead of Lemon Tea.  Interesting.  RED.  I'll drink some RED Juice-Type Beverage.    Unless if it's vegetable juice.  That's disgusting.  Vegetables are disgusting and once you reduce them to juice that's ten times worse.  Who are you trying to fool into drinking this crap.  Wearing a new shirt.  Mom got it for me over internet?  Nice fancy shirt.  Nice material and whatnot.  Some sort of Prince of Persia might be caught wearing this shirt.  Got buttons at the top but THEY'RE JUST FOR SHOW.  Buttons aren't necessary at all with this shirt but there they are anyway!  Not my favorite part of the shirt.  One of my least favorite parts.  Actually?  LEAST FAVORITE PART!!!
     Little upset my Mom made coffee today before I could.  Enough for one cup for me.  Not two!  Now I'm gonna have to make it later.  I like doing it myself from the start.  I HAVE A SYSTEM.  Thinking about getting a Subway Sandwich instead of a bagel.  It's delicious too because of the bread.  But instead of butter it's some sort of gross Subway Meat.  MMM.  Snapple talk in FIRST paragraph.  Lunch talk AT ALL.  This entry isn't great!  The good news is I forget everything is bad news.  Nice fancy blue shirt.  Is it blue?  Is it turquoise?  Only Anyone Who Looks At The Shirt knows for sure!  And not Anyone.  I looked at it and I don't know.  I'm no color expert.  I know the basics sure.  But that's about it.  My crayon box limit was maybe 16.  And I don't remember 16 colors anymore anyway.
     Whatever.  I assume it's called Turquoise because it was the Ottoman Empire's favorite color.  Why would Ottoman Empire like Turkey.  Turkey replaced Ottoman Empire?  I don't have all the details?  Either way I stand by what I said even though we just clarified that it makes no sense.  If I don't stand by my Incorrect Nonsense who will?  Hopefully no one.  That would by my expectation.  Anyway.  Look into setting up Booster Shot appointment today.  What with my low blood pressure I coulda gotten it done a month or two ago.  Gotta imagine that's a condition that qualifies ya.  You don't have to imagine it no one's FORCING you.  Maybe I will arrange that in the future to force you to imagine things but AS OF NOW I don't have that power.  Hmm.  Finished Snapple.  I guess I'll waste some of the precious Soda I have left.
     I think The Ottoman Empire is gonna come back in a big way sometime soon.  They're due for a reboot!  Wait.  Ottoman Empire May HAVE BEEN Turkey.  And they replaced The Holy Roman Empire?  Gonna have to look into this.  Later.  I'll let the confusion and misinformation settle for both of us and then once we don't know what's going on and what we do know is wrong THEN I'll hit you with some facts.  And by, "Then," I mean, "Never."  I'm never gonna come back to this.  Oh well ya win some ya lose some.  What else is going on.  Also I've only seen Jellyfish in group.  Ya rarely see just one jellyfish.  INCORRECT.  You see lone jellyfish all the time.  Get off my back about it.  So far the theme of this entry is Me Saying Incorrect Information.  Also at the same time it's the theme of every entry Not Very Good.  Gotta have a consistent theme!  That's mine!  I picked it out of a hat and now I'm stuck with it!
    I feel like I've literally picked things out of a hat at some point.  Not sure what.  Not sure why!  But we heard the expression and RAN WITH IT.  Also favorite thing to pick out of a hat?  Head lice.  Doesn't belong there.  It'll just get back in your head.  Gotta get rid of it completely.  Hey I got coffee going on delicious.  What else is going on delicious.  Thursday?  How about that.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Feels more like a Wednesday or even a Tuesday.  Let's say Wednesday.  Good compromise?  Can we agree to satisfy all parties that Today Is Wednesday?  Great.  I think it's great that in that definition of the word I AM A PARTY.  Love it.  We're each individually parties!  Sounds like fun.  The point is what else.  I hope there's ice cream cake at Me.  That's the standard party activity right.  Across all ages and circumstances.  Party = You're gonna want some Ice Cream Cake.
     Anyway.  I think we can all agree Ice Cream Cake is Cake.  And not Ice Cream.  But it's not really as open and shut as that.  Maybe if you adjust the proportions just a little bit it CAN BE Ice Cream with Cake inside of it.  I wanna try THAT.  Gimme some of THAT.  Sure why not.  Also?  Probably only available in Canada.  DAMN CANADA.  I'm sure there's birthday cake flavored ice cream.  That's not what I'm talking about!  I think you know what I'm talking about.  I've made myself abundantly clear.  Also Ice Cream Bundt Cake.  Let's do it.  Hey let's check out National Food Meal Of The Day.  Apple Cider Day-- don't care.  Don't like it, don't care enough to actively dislike it!  National vichyssoise Day.  I don't wanna know what that is.  I gotta look it up but I'm not happy about it.  I think something's are better left alone.  Some sort of Dumb Soup.  Has onions in it.  WHAT ARE THEY TRYING TO KILL US?
     Eighth paragraph!  Amazing.  Thinking about getting Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki sandwich from Subway.  I think the word Onion is just for show.  I'm not convinced I'm actually getting onions in it.  Oh right.  I think Sweet Onion is THE DRESSING.  So that's not real onions.  It's just onion flavor.  Presumably derived from something else.  Maybe some sort of turnip or something.  Which are safe!  FOR NOW.  What else is going on.  The point is I have mixed feelings about trying Raspberry Snapple because it's a big commitment.  An entire week's worth of snapple.  But what's the worst that could happen.  It can't be BAD.  It could only be NOT AS GOOD.  It's still Artificial Sweetener Water.  That's pretty much it.  What else is going on.  Writing these paragraphs very quickly.  Gotta get back on schedule.  Also easier than writing them slowly.
     Wonderful.  Now I'm gonna hit a rough patch and slow down.  I spoke too soon!  I'm always speaking too soon.  People are talking to me and then I start responding before they're done talking.  Really annoying!  But you can't blame me.  Kind of your fault!  Taking too long to finish talking.  That's not my problem that's your problem.  What else is going on.  Kinda feel subconsciously hey I'm writing fast I must have something great I'm looking forward to when this is over and done with.  Nope!  Got absolutely nothing to look forward to.  Hmm.  I can CHEW GUM on upcoming walk.  That's good.  Get some Gum Juices going.  I may be low on beverages but chewing gum is halfway there I guess.  Another joke for Rick James to Charlie Murphy HEY CHARLIE what do you say when you're tasting something and it sort of Reminds You of Some Other Flavor.  And you're like Hmm this, "INSERT WORD HERE," of this flavor it tastes like.  That's another Historical Fan Fiction Alternate History Universe that could have happened.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  I accomplished what I set out to do and everything.  No I didn't.  I went into this thinking I'd make something worthwhile.  I'm coming out of it pretty confident it was terrible.  But on the other hand STILL TIME TO TURN IT AROUND.  Sure what else is going on.  I was happy with this shirt and everything.  I thought it would make my life better.  Better Shirt, Better Life, as they say.  NOPE.  If anything it's the complete opposite.  Anyway Thanksgiving is a week from today I believe.  If I believe it hard enough it might come true.  And then I'm The Boy Who Saved Thanksgiving.  YEAH.  Anyway.  I'd eat some turkey.  That's where the word Turquoise comes from.  Because its Turkey: The Animal's favorite color.  You show them some turquoise and they go crazy.  Crazy with JOY.  Hey great I'm gonna take a break now.  Be back soon.

I'm Going Somewhere With This

    Hello friends.  Gonna get a bottle of soda with Subway Purchase.  What a brilliant idea.  They probably sell Diet Coke and That's It.  I'll take it!  Anyway gonna try set up Booster Shot when this entry is over.  That way the day isn't a total loss.  It already isn't.  Confirmation I have low blood pressure.  That's something to Toast To.  Anyway.  I was thinking I might celebrate upcoming birthday with 2 or 3 beers.  Now I'm thinking celebrate upcoming birthday with largest serving of Iced Coffee.  My parent's don't want me going into a Starbucks because It's Not Safe but, being the birthday boy, I think I have a strong case to make a one day exception free pass conjugal visit.  That sounds even more delicious than beer.  Not even close!  Beer tastes okay a lot o the time but that's not the main part.  Not FOR ME.  Maybe for SOME JERKS.
    What else is the Main Part for Some Jerks.  Getting myself a white bread so I can make two sandwiches over the week.  I feel like Kevin McAllister ordering a whole cheese pizza just for himself.  I'm getting a whole loaf of Wonderbread all for myself!  ALSO I might get two sandwiches out of it NEXT week.  So basically that's... lemme crunch the numbers... EIGHT slices of bread being consumed.  That makes it worth it.  Worth it A LOT.  Also whoever came up with the name Wonderbread?  WONDER-FUL.  I really wanna eat some White Bread called Wonderbread.  I've wanted to my whole life!  Maybe that's part o the appeal.  When I was a kid we would get Home Pride Whole Wheat Bread.  Wonderbread White Bread was The American Dream that I was being deprived of with this nonsense.  Now I can have it and I can't get enough of it!  Well I can get enough of it.  I'll eat about half of it and throw the other half out.  But the half I eat I'll eat sure it's bread why not I can make sandwiches with it.
     Hmm.  Oh.  Right.  Birthday Iced Coffee.  Delicious.  Also if I tell them it's my birthday I think they have to give it to me for free?  Maybe.  Sure.  Why not!  Anyway what else is going on.  Drinking soda unapologetically.  Should be mixing in water but I'm not.  Just gonna go with soda until there's none less.  Prove me wrong!  What else is going on.  KIND OF apologetically.  I haven't specifically apologized to anyone but I feel some remorse, shame, and disgust with myself that I'm doing it.  So there's that!  What else is going on.  First idea was Starbucks Iced Coffee.  Until now it was the only idea!  Now I realize I can get Dunkin Donuts.  That way I can get a birthday Donut too.  Starbucks has pastries.  Yeah but I'm not, "Comfortable," with their pastries.  Serving size is too large!  Or possibly too small.  I trust Dunkin Donuts more when it comes to a Birthday Snack.  They Got SPRINKLES on donuts.  I've been fantastasizing about sprinkles for months!  This could be my big opportunity to eat some sprinkles!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Wonderful!  It's good because there's less of it to go.  That way we can all move on with our lives.  To the next thing.  Whatever that may be.  Whatever it is I wish you the best.  I'm not sure if that's true.  I wish me the best.  Whatever positive mojo is left over you can share amongst yourselves.  Anyway what else is going on.  It's POSSIBLE my Mom made enough coffee that I have enough left for a full 2nd cup.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Soon! Can't wait until I Need It.  Gonna have to pour it in ahead of time to see if its enough.  And then let it sit for a while and microwave it when I'm ready.  Best course of action I can think of!  Wonderful.  LOOK does McDonald's also make passable iced coffee?  Sure!  But there's none within walking distance of my house so why the Hell would I go there YOU IDIOT?  Get out of my face with that idiotic suggestion YOU SIMPLETON.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Cool!  LOOK would I consider getting two or EVEN THREE personal sized bottles of diet soda from Subway under other conditions?  Sure!  But I don't wanna justify that to my parents.  Not worth the hassle.  They're already being understanding about me getting a loaf of bread to throw out half the loaf.  Still an amazing deal.  Two dollars and 30 cents for whole loaf so I can personally eat 8 slices?  I'd make that deal IN A MILLISECOND.  Which is exactly what I did.  Didn't even take the millisecond.  I took the deal without thinking about it at all!  But now that I'm thinking about it Nothing Has Changed!  Wonderful.  Hmm.  Loaf contains 18 slices.  I'm almost eating an entire Half Of That!  WOW TALK ABOUT MAKING THE MOST OF THE BUFFALO.  It's an American Indian reference you wouldn't understand.  Hey time to take a bath.  Be back soon.

Now I'm Making Sense

    Got some water going on.  I'm not A MONSTER.  Maybe I am.  But for different reasons!  Oh well that's life.  I think today is gonna shape up to be pretty good.  I get to eat a sandwich.  OTHER STUFF.  But basically the sandwich.  Just poured myself some soda.  I'M A MONSTER DON'T LOOK AT ME.  The point is Subway Trip will be maybe an hour, an hour and a half after school lets out.  Will it be packed with teenagers?  I dunno!  I think Teenagers are too, "Hip," for Subway.  But there might be some counter-culture Teenagers who go the other way and enjoy Subway, "Ironically."  In which case I'd be HONORED to share standing in line with them I think they've got things figured out.  Hmm what's the most ironic sandwich you can get.  Off the top of my head The American Club.  But that's just the first sandwich that came to mind.  Any sandwich that came to mind would have been the first Ironic Sandwich Potential Possibility.  Gonna have coffee now with Paragraph II Act III.
     I don't think teenagers are Ironic To Be Cool anymore.  Now THAT'S uncool.  They'd have to ironically be ironic somehow to be cool.  Good luck to them figuring it out!  But if anyone has the ingenuity to be cool it's teenagers.  Wait a second.  That's not right.  As an adult I think teenagers are the furthest thing from cool any age group can be.  They don't know what they're doing at all!  Except for irony.  If and when they're ironic I GET THAT.  YA KNOW WHAT?  I think I'm gonna get 2 bottles of soda from Subway.  Assuming they have any flavor of diet soda.  Let's go nuts It's MY BIRTHDAY SOON.  Also YA KNOW WHAT?  If they're offering some sort of nuts as a topping for my Sweet Onion Chicken Teriyaki Sandwich?  NO THANK YOU.  I don't like nuts and I don't like nuts in sandwich.  Used to have peanut butter sandwiches as a kid and that grosses me the Hell out now.  I think it did then, too.  I tolerated it for a good time and ate it but I can't remember ever Not Being Grossed Out By It.  CASE CLOSED.
     What else is going on.  Got some nice Cancer Animal Crackers coming to me upcoming Super Market order.  They're sold out 6 out of 7 days the last few weeks.  Btu checking every hour has paid off and I'm usually able to sneak in a few boxes while they're available.  Gotta be persistent!  When you wanna eat mini animal crackers!  And that's the main thing I wanna do these days!  And I've been pretty successful all things considered!  Anyway.  Gonna try to set up Booster Appointment in a little bit.  Hopefully for some morning time next week.  At local CVS I can walk to.  I assume I can walk home after shot.  And not be decapacitated.   I assume a lot of things.  It's fun.  Most of what I assume turns out to be accurate!  That was the premise I had going into the whole deal.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Wonderful.  Look could I get a diet Vitamin Water or something from Subway?  Maybe.  I'm HOPING I can get Diet Soda though.  That's what I want from this endeavor.  I could always go next door to convenience shop and buy soda there.  I don't wanna spend CASH.  I haven't used cash in 18 months.  And if I make it to 24 months I GET A PRIZE.  Wow!  This is news to me!  GOOD NEWS.  What else is going on.  I DID have to end up making my own coffee.  Not a big deal!  In the end it worked out because I didn't have to microwave second cup of coffee.  It was still hot in pot from being freshly brewed!  AMAZING STORY.  THAT'S ONE FOR THE AGES.  ALL THE AGES.  EVEN TEENAGERS.  THEY'RE NOT COOL NOW BUT MAYBE ONE DAY.  Looks like I may be discussing Getting New Phone tonight.  Like around 9 PM.  Dad was talking about his new phone with some guy and he's gonna call back then.  And I will participate on that conversation about my own phone.  GREAT.  That will interrupt my dinner plans.  THE BEST LAID PLANS and whatnot.  And whatnot what.  BEST LAID PLANS interrupted by telephone calls about telephones.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Amazing.  Haven't had Snapple #2 yet.  That's one saving grace about drinking soda.  I still got the snapple saved!  When's my birthday.  Three and a half weeks or so.  Let's LTURQ.  Three weeks and three days.  So basically I WAS EXACTLY CORRECT.  I feel like I should get A Bonus Birthday Prize because of this successful estimation.  I should be rewarded every time I do something accurately.  Otherwise what would be my motivation to continue doing and saying accurate things?  No one, that's who!  What else is going on.  Any possibility they say, "Can't make sweet onion chicken teriyaki, there's an onion problem."  My guess is What Do They Care.  And also like I said no actual onion in the sweet onion chicken teriyaki.  It's all Artificial Onion Sweeteners.  The point is the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-1:21 P.M.

Wednesday, November 17, 2021 

You Are Reading This

    Hey!  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  Just had Zoom appointment I had forgotten about.  FUN STORY #1 DOWN.  Was on phone for 2 hours over 3 phone calls trying to get new phone and I FAILED.  But now I think I know what to do to succeed next time I call in a few days or next week.  FUN STORY #2 DOWN.  Those are all the fun stories I have accumulated.  Oh no.  Next week is a few days.  A LONG few days.  The point is I'm fairly confident while they were trying to get me a new phone they weren't looking at my pornography viewership.  They never gave indication that the ywere like Oh... OH... I see... now I know what you're all about... then again they're probably used to looking at pornography on people's phones remotely so they know how to not give any verbal indications they're absorbing it.  Anyway stuck with this phone for another bit.  DAMNIT.
     Now I get to think harder about what color I want.  They asked me yesterday Black Silver or a third thing and I didn't think about it!  Just said Black!  Sounded the safest generic color.  Maybe I want silver though.  Maybe I want The Third Thing.  Whatever it is.  The mystery color.  Let's go with the mystery color!  I want what's behind door three.  Also these doors lead to nowhere.  There's no separate rooms behind these doors.  Totally arbitrary doors!  What else is going on.  I feel like the guy who invented doors was an idiot.  Doesn't he know we can just open the doors?  What he wants to build is A WALL.  That'll keep people out!  Hmm something's wrong with my mind.  I'll get to the bottom of it later.  In the meantime I have to write a few more paragraphs.  Anyway.  Being on phone led to Late Lunch yesterday.  We're talking dinner time.  5:40 PM.  However it was DELICIOUS.
     Fun story #3 down!  Everything in the entry after Fun Story #2 WAS ACTUALLY Fun Story #3.  What a twist!  Didn't see that surprise coming.  What else is going on.  Maybe do Booster Shot Find Out Where And When To Get It Chore today.  Sounds like it shouldn't be too hard.  And if it is great solution for that-- don't do it.  Put it off for another day!  Works for me.  Anyway.  Was a little behind schedule today BEFORE re-calibrating for Therapist Appointment.  That's another 10 minutes I lost!  Oh well that's life.  Losing minutes.  We gained 60 minutes a week and a half ago.  That's OLD NEWS.  I ALREADY SPENT THOSE MINUTES.  DOESN'T MATTER ANYMORE BY NOW.  Oh well.  Therapist talked to me about Boston Market again.  She does that every thanksgiving.  And probably on average 2 or 3 times a year NON-Thanksgiving.  I GET IT.  YOU GET MONEY FROM BOSTON MARKET TO RECOMMEND THEM TO YOUR IMPRESSIONABLE PATIENTS.  MESSAGE RECEIVED.
     Maybe I should get Boston Market.  I got it back when I was a kid a few times.  Then it was called Boston Chicken.  I guess they had to change their name because people were confused somehow for some reason.  Hmm.  You can't be getting Boston Chicken for Thanksgiving.  We eat Turkey thanksgiving!  Better to go to a Market than to a Chicken.  Hmm.  I feel like Boston Market is supposed to be classier than KFC.  KFC is for the kids and fast food junkies looking for a quick fix.  Chicken CONNOISSEURS go to Boston Market to get it done PROFESSIONALLY.  Sounds good to me.  I can eat chicken today.  Almost definitely will!  No spoilers on what the meal is.  But chicken is the main part of it!  Kinda too much of a spoiler already.  Forget what I just said.  I said nothing about eating chicken today.  And if I did it was clever misdirection and it may actually not be true.  False Flag!  Yeah.  Sure.
     Fifth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  All I had to do was write nothing entertaining so of course it was written very quickly.  Alright!  Works for me.  Pizza with the works.  Without anchovies.  Works for me without anchovies.  Hmm want some anchovies now.  Oh well it's not in the cards right now.  Hmm could go out and get pizza for lunch.  Pick it up on a walk.  Eat some anchovies.  Throw out the pizza.  Pizza is like chicken.  When I was talking about eating chicken I was actually talking about eating pizza which I am actually throwing out and just eating the anchovies.  Oh okay now all the pieces are coming together and it makes a lot of sense.  I feel like Pizza With The Works should unionize.  Something like that.  Not really.  Huh.  Not sure I've ever had pizza with chicken on it.  That's a tough one.  Not really.  Huh.  Time for coffee.  That will make my life and/or the entry better.  What's the difference.  Hmm gonna have to think about that one.
     Entry is Dumb but Entertains Me Somehow.  Life is Smart but Somehow Doesn't Entertain Me.  Off the top of my head.  Thought could be a False Flag.  Man I wish I believed in False Flags.  Every time something happens that doesn't please me NOPE FALSE FLAG.  Didn't really happen.  What else is going on.  Not sure what a False Flag is.  Once a flag exists kind of True To Itself.  No such this as a false flag!  If it's a flag guess what IT'S A FLAG THERE'S NO DENYING IT.  Maybe something that Isn't A Flag At All is a false flag.  Hey this cup of coffee is a false flag.  Not a flag!  False!  Ok that makes some sense.  I like taking care of business on the phone because it makes me feel like A Big Man by knowing what to say and what questions to ask.  I know the topic we're talking about well enough I Think I Got A Handle Of What We're Conversating About!  Alright!
     Anyway.  Sorry.  Conserving About.  Got the word wrong.  Anyway.  I like putting people on Speaker phone and then when they start talking I go STOP YELLING Why are you talking so loud.  But Phone people get it.  They can see they're on speaker phone and they laugh along with the clever joke.  Amazing.  Any thought into an anti-speaker phone?  Button to press to make them micro-speak?  Yeah it's called Adjusting The Volume.  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.  I don't think my phone works that way!  Anyway.  Maybe I should get a silver phone.  Silver is more valuable than black.  You can look up Trading Silver and the prices ever-changing.  No looking up Trading Black.  Not since the early 1800's at least.  HISTORY.  I feel like that's an accurate guess of when they un-legalized multinational selling people.  It happened a little bit before outlawing slavery entirely right?  The point is SORRY.
     What else.  Any black people at the first Thanksgiving.  Better LTURQ.  Not seeing any scholarly discussion on it immediately.  Oh well.  Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day #1-- "There were black people at the first Thanksgiving."  Wait no. That was a false flag.  I lied.  Not true.  Let's LTURQ for real.  Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day #1-- "The Basenji is the only type of dog that does not bark."  Hmm.  I have some thoughts.  1) It's either a lie or inadvertently wrong.  2) what's a basenji.  3)Bark?  Like on a tree?  4) THIS WAS FUN STORY #4 THANK YOU VERY MUCH.  What else is going on.  5) Bark?  Like Peppermint Bark?  Which is A National Food Day I wanna say June 30th?  Better LTURQ.  December 1st.  SO CLOSE.  I said the 30th and many times that's the DAY BEFORE the 1st.  Wow how lucky can ya be.  Anyway now that I'm there Patriotism Meal Of The Day Is... National Baklava Day AND National Homemade Bread Day.  I'd have some homemade bread.  Not my home.  Unless someone else comes in my home to make it.  I'm not making the bread but if someone else is I'll have some of their bread.  Also Baklava sure I have no problem with Baklava why not I support all Eastern European Countries.  Maybe not all of them.  Probably would have to take it on a case-by-case basis.
     Ninth paragraph.  What was the fact again.  Some dog doesn't bark.  Wonderful.  Do they make other kind of noises.  Or just stay silent.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Maybe later.  Let's say in 30 years.  I'll put it off for 30 years and then when I'm 62 I'll think OH RIGHT GOTTA CHECK IF THIS DOG MAKES ANY OTHER SOUNDS.  So now I've got something to look forward to is the point.  I don't look forward to that.  It's WORK.  I don't wanna do it.  Me looking forward to it was a False Flag!  GOTCHA!  Anyway jeez.  Honest question-- has QANON given any NON False Flags yet?  I feel like everything so far has been a False Flag.  Has there been ONE flag that panned out and delivered on what was promised?  My guess?  I dunno leave me out of it.  I shouldn't even leave QANON as a word on my website.  Then google will deliver crazy people here and they'd wanna kill me for mocking all their inaccurate flags.  Oh well too late to go back now.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  It'd be pretty cool to be 62.  I could easily be dead by then.  Anyway.  What's the name of the dog I have to look up? Basenji.  No way am I gonna remember that for 30 years.  I couldn't remember it for 10 minutes.  Guess I'll have to make it my safe word or something.  So I say it a lot.  That's how sex works.  Constantly saying your safe word.  Sounds like you're not coordinating this sexual experience so well if you're saying your safe word over and over.  That's not your fault that's your partner's fault.  They gotta get their act together!  Anyway.  Solid chance entry takes a turn FOR THE BETTER in the next act.  Can't really get much worse.  I LIKE those odds.  Anyway.  Are we in the midst of Fun Story #5?  Hard to say exactly.  We'll have to see how the rest of this entry/My Life shakes out!  Be back soon.

Where Did You Get That Idea

    Hello friends.  Gotta write another 5 paragraphs.  Fun Story #6.  Wonderful.  I looked up Boston Market and I'm not a fan of their sides.  Most of he side dishes tha comes with meals aren't appealing to me!  NEXT.  I like talking to people on Zoom.  I can make eye contact with them without it being scary.  Because it doesn't register as heavily as if we were making eye contact with each other exactly.  Because I'm looking at one part of the screen and her at another so we both could be making eye contact BUT our eyes are never actually meeting.  WONDERFUL.  I'd like to expand this eye contact system to Real Life.  Who can I talk to so I could get the ball rolling on this.  Elon Musk?  He's in charge now, right?  That's the impression I've been getting.  Anyway.  Entry is dumb AND doesn't entertain me.  Life is dumb and doesn't entertain me.  I dunno what I was talking about before.  Life is pretty dumb and pretty unentertaining!  But it's a Fun Story #7 All The Same.
    Yeah!  What other things can we learn from Zoom that we should apply to Non-Zoom Life.  Don't need to wear pants all the time.  The time in human history where pants should be necessary is long gone.  In the 21st century we don't need 'em!  I'd wear boxer shorts out and about.  Why not.  No one is seeing anything they shouldn't see.  And I'm comfortable!  Also it will make the women I pass think about sex.  And then they're gonna wanna have sex immediately.  And guess who just happens to be walking by at that exact moment?  ME!  This is working out great for me is the point.  Oh man and I get to see ladies in underwear.  Didn't even think of that!  I thought the premise would be we don't need pants because We're All Adults Here and aren't gonna turn this into a sex thing.  Nope!  It's still a sex thing!
    What else is going on.  I like how Boston market gives you the option of jus getting Dark Chicken.  I think I like dark chicken.  Because I'm a free thinker.  Then again what do I know.  I believe they prefer to be called African American Chicken.  I feel like I made that joke in 2014.  Not sure exactly but Making It Before comes to mind and 2014 comes to mind as well.  Oh well that's life.  All jokes aside I'd like to walk around in socks.  I know shoes are for our own benefit and safety but I don't care.  I'll take my chances!  Being out and about in socks sounds like the ONLY way to be out and about around town.  Hmm.  I think this is based on True Life Experience.  Maybe being in Dormitory and walking around dormitory outside my room in socks.  And being like THIS IS SCANDALOUS I'M PRACTICALLY NAKED.  But in a good way.  Being naked is a good way.  I'm comfortable with my body.  A solid 30% o the time.   Fun Story #8!
    Sure.  What else is going on.  Probably talked about that in 2014, too.  Let's be honest 80% of this is from 2014.  The more things change the more they stay the same.  Wouldn't wanna walk around without socks though.  That's a bit too dangerous.  Also I don't need people seeing my feet.  Private!  You wanna see my feet you gotta pay the toll.  What toll.  That will be determined if and when someone wants to see my feet.  Haven't had the need to set up the toll process yet!  Anyway what else is going on.  THEN AGAIN walking around without shoes decreases my height by a quarter or half of an inch.  But that could be a GOOD thing.  I might have Positive Feelings Inside!  Hey I'm so comfortable with myself I don't mind being even shorter.  Good for me.  I'm having a blast being self satisfied with my appearance.  Sounds good to me!
     Last paragraph of the act.  I don't believe it!  Also if other people are walking around in their socks I can wear their shoes so with double shoes I'm taller than I would be normally.  So basically people walking around in their socks works out for EVERYONE but ESPECIALLY me.  Huh.  Maybe take a shower today.  I can see myself enjoying a nice shower.  Get to stand up and everything.  Yep that's the main part of taking a shower.  Especially compared to taking a bath.  Whatever.  Gonna watch that Chinese Themed Marvel movie today.  It's a movie, it's got Chinese People, and I don't know what else you need.  They're 2 for 2 in terms of getting my attention!  Guy's name is Shang Chi.  I'm a little worried people will confuse him with Chiang Kai-shek.  Who was some guy.  Probably a Communist.  Better LTURQ.  More like some sort of Chinese Nationalist Dictator type person.  That could be only 30% accurate.  That's as close as we're gonna get for now!  FUN STORY #9 DOWN.  Shower time.  I'll be back soon.

What's The Deal With That

    Ended up taking a bath.  Got to the bathtub and called an audible!  Which is a football term.  And an Audio Book term.  And also a Bathtub term apparently.  Huh.  I only have to write five more paragraphs.  That should be easy.  Then I have the whole day ahead of me.  That should be easy, too!  Then I have nighttime.  No too difficult!  I barely have to put in any effort into life at all while I'm asleep.  Not as far as I can tell, at least.  Anyway let's learn more about Chian Kay Shek.  On our own time.  We'll all read the Wikipedia Article and Meet Back Here Tomorrow!  And not talk about it!  Just read whatever dumb stuff I think about writing for tomorrow.  BUT even if it's not said it will be unspoken knowledge that we all know a little bit more about history and whatnot. And the inspiration for this Chinese Themed Marvel Movie.  TEN Rings?  Too many rings to keep track of.  Maybe try four or five rings.
     What else is going on.  Ten rings is a ring for each finger.  Feels like at that point the rings are kinda superfluous.  I don't think I've ever worn a ring.  A ring pop maybe.  But I've never had a ring in life that I wore as a ring.  Hmm.  Might have had some fingers in SPLINTS at one time or another.  That's like a ring.  I like ring pops.  FINALLY CANDY I CAN WEAR.  Also I dunno how they figured it out but It Tastes Good to raise up your finger to your mouth and suck on candy from that angle.  I don't know why but It Just Works!  Hmm gotta look into where I can get some ring pops.  Maybe later.  First priority is still Chiang Kay Shek.  Huh.  I'm not sure if I've worn splints or just seen them in movies.  Sounds fun though.  FUN STORY #10.  What was.  ME FINISHING THIS PARAGRAPH.
    Amazing.  Coffee #2.  Resuming Snapple #1.  Three more paragraphs!  I don't believe it.  I think the best part of my days the last couple of week is when there's granulated artificial sweetener on the otherwise empty coffee mug that I can stick to my finger and eat.  And it tastes and feels like eating sugar.  WOW.  What a charmed life I live.  Tried putting Artificial Sweetener on Belgian Waffle before putting it into the oven last night?  Results?  Kind of worked!  It didn't completely backfire, I can say that.  No explosions or anything.  So the point is I'll try that again for sure.  The point is today Therapist really broke through with suggesting Boston Market.  This is the 20th time she's brought it up without exaggerating.  FINALLY it hit me.  Hey maybe I SHOULD try Boston Market.  Not for Thanksgiving necessarily.  But just in general.  OKAY YOU WIN.  Took 12 years of therapy.  But YOU FINALLY GOT ME.
     Penultimate paragraph.  Chinese Marvel Movie would be a good thing to watch during CircleWalking.  The last DisneyPlus Movie I watched was also when I was circlewalking.  So there's that.  Then again some of it is in Chinese.  I gotta read subtitles.  Hard to read subtitles when half the time you're walking in the other direction.  I think I'm past the point of subtitles.  Movie started out with subtitles but now I think they've worked their way around to mostly English.  Wonderful.  Also I think this movie is a SCAM.  Because China is a huge market and making a film about China would presumably do well in China.  WHATTA SCAM.  TRYING TO MAKE MOVIES THAT APPEAL TO PEOPLE WHO WILL PAY TO WATCH THE MOVIE.  I'm onto their game.  Also China is OUR ENEMY.  They have MONEY.  WE'RE supposed to have all the money.  HERE COME A COLD WAR.
     Last paragraph.  Great.  Fun Story #12.  Me saying, "Great," just then.  Wonderful.  I don't mean to brag but I'm wearing a clean fresh pair of underwear today.  Totally different from what I wore yesterday!  I got this from a drawer and it was put in the drawer directly from being washed and dried in some sort of machine (and/or machines).  So I got all that going for me is the point.  Also of course I mean to brag.  This reflects greatly on me.  I come out of this story looking wonderful.  What else is going on.  Good news/bad News.  Bad News--- just finished Coffee #2.  Good News-- lots of granulated artificial sweetener to scoop up with my finger.  And then deposit into my mouth.  That sort of thing.  HEY the point is the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow I guess!

-1:25 P.M.

Tuesday, November 16, 2021 

I Don't Know What To Say

    Hey!  What happened to Halloween Candy.  I haven't heard from it since November 1st.  My first guess is Mom ate it but she was leaving over Twixes.  What happened to the Twixes?  I guess we'll never know.  The point is it's November 16th so according to my Dad it's the end of November.  He didn't say that specifically.  Kind of extrapolating what he said to make that point.  Inaccurately!  I'm putting words in his mouth I'm pretty sure he wouldn't say.  Dunno why.  Makes me feel like a big man making him sound dumb.  Now I'M the alpha male in the house.  Cause I don't think it's the end of the month on the 16th.  That's life I guess.  Anyway.  Gotta imagine we share Alpha Male duties.  No reason for one person to be more than the other.  We can share being Top Dawg!  Also my Mom is alpha female by default.  So she's gotta be happy with that.
     Anyway.  A little bit behind schedule today.  I'll catch up probably.  Got nothin' better to do!  Maybe look into getting new phone later in the afternoon.  It's something I have to do and Today Is A Day so you put those together and Today Is A Day I can do What I Have To Do.  Anyway I just asked my Mom about the candy.  She ate all the Non-Twix Candy.  Guess the Twix are going on the garbage.  Also is the plural of Twix Twix.  My guess is they never thought about it and it never came up until Just Now.  So I guess I get to decide.  Alright.  Plural of Twix is Twixeses.  There ya go have fun with that.  It never came up because no one ever wanted another Twix after one.  Hey you want a multiple Twix.  No Thanks I'm Good!  That'll show them for making adequate candy.  The point is we can send all these Twix to a starving family somewhere so they could die from malnutrition instead of undernutrition.  I feel like malnutrition is a solid SEVERAL steps up from undernutrition.  Definitely progress in the right direction!
     What else is going on.  Look eating Twix every day for a couple of weeks isn't going to kill you.  Probably.  Less than 5% chance it'll kill you immediately!  Look my Mom apparently had 3x as many Twix as we're talking about But Other Candies over a week or two and she's alive.  As far as I know.  If she's not alive she's doing a pretty good imitation of being alive!  But she was eating THREE candies.  They cancel each other one.  Just Twix is no good.  That's where the phrase Just Twix, Please Resist comes from.  Hmm always wondered where it came from.  Now I know!  Hershey Bar, Stay Far (away).  Three Musketeers, Ends In Tears.  Alright I'm done.  What else is going on.  HEY coffee is coming up relatively soon.  That'll make my life better slightly.  Great!  What National Food Day we got going on today.  National Fast Food Day.  You're gonna have to be A LOT more specific with that.  Not really sure what I'm supposed to celebrate at all with this.  No good!
    Sure.  What kind of day of the week do we got going on today.  Tuesday.  That's great.  I have no problems with Tuesday.  Could be better but that's life.  Man setting up getting a new phone might take TIME.  That's what I've been dreading.  I dunno how much time.  Could be 10 minutes.  Could be 3 hours.  Either way if it's more than 3 minutes I'm not happy with it.  3 minutes and up is Bad so it doesn't really matter how long it does take.  But it'd be nice to get it out of the way.  DAMNIT once that's out of the way something else will just replace it In The Way.  There's always something to do!  Such are the responsibilities of a co-alpha male.  You wanna be co-top-dawg you're gonna have to do things for 10 minutes to 3 hours All The Time!  Doesn't sound right.  Co-alpha male should be able to intimidate others into doing their busy work for them.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.
    Sure.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  Hey!  Should I/Could I think of more Candy Slogans that tell you not to eat the candy?  Maybe.  Maybe not.  There's really no way of knowing for sure.  I'm gonna err on the side of probably not unless something good happens to come to me without me really trying.  Starburst, Makes Heart Hurt.  This time it specifically hurts your heart.  Makes sense.  York Peppermint Patties, Will Make You A Fatty.  Charleston Chew, Oh No What Did You Do.  Ok time to move on again.  Anyway.  Apparently The Mets found one other guy who was a candidate for GM and were like GOOD ENOUGH HERE'S THE JOB.  And the headline on Mets Blog/Official Page to tell us about the new GM is "Some Guy Says he is a 'Straight-Up Guy."  WOW.  A STRAIGHT UP GUY FOR GM.  That means a lot to me.  It's about time we're getting a straight up guy.  All these past GMS have been Whatever The Opposite Of That Is!
     Stuck on Snickers.  Hmm.  Snickers, Hurts Your Figures.  See it's harder than it looks.  The point is I have coffee going on so everything else that I'm mildly complaining about is cancelled out.  Delicious!  Any coffee flavored candy bars.  Sure The Coffee Bar.  Better LTURQ.  Looks like there was a Canadian Nestle bar Coffee Crisp that doesn't exist anymore.  Dumb Canada.  Why can't they still make it and then export it to America.  That way I would try it once and then regret it.  Not a huge fan of this kind of crisp!  Was hoping for a better crisp.  That's what my imaginary hot take would be.  Hmm.  After Phone, next thing I need to do is set up Booster Shot Appointment.  GREAT.  That could possibly take 10 minutes to 3 hours, too!  WHAT THE HELL.  What if I canceled each other out.  Called the people who give me new phone but instead tell them to set up my Booster Shot Appointment.  Two problems solved with one stone.
     DAMNIT still need to throw one stone though.  I wanna throw NO stones to kill two birds.  Is that possible.  That's the dream!  The point is should I eat 22 Big Fun Size Twix in a row and keep repeating I'M DOING A GOOD THING.  My guess?  That's one way to go with my life.  Not my first choice or the most obvious course of action but it IS something I CAN do and it'd be interesting to see what kind of alternate universe that leads me down.  Hmm.  I like interesting alternate universes.  Maybe I should do it!  Also I get to eat 22 candy in a row which sounds like an experience I'll never forget.  Hmm gonna have to consider this more than I thought I would.  I don't like the phrase Alternate Universe.  Kind of implies that out of Infinity Universe there's ONE permutation that's like Actually This One Is The Standard One.  The other trillions and trillions and trillions are alternate but THIS ONE is the main one for some reason. 
    Hmm.  I wanna be in the main universe!  Sounds special.  Then again what else is going on.  Eighth paragraph!  Trillion is the biggest word number that I know what it means.  Quintillion or something might be the one after Trillion.  Let's LTURQ.  Oh.  Quadrillion is after Trillion.  THEN Quintillion.  The point is See I'm Just Like You.  We all know Trillion but not the next thing but we do know the thing after the next thing which is Quadrillion.  Makes sense.  The point is with the way inflation is going we're gonna have to get used to Quintillions AND FAST. YEAH.  Because we'll need to use That Much Money to buy things!  Not sure what's going on with inflation exactly.  Gonna have to look into that one at some point.  I think I'm supposed to get my new phone for free but if inflation goes up enough does Free Things start to cost A little Bit?  My guess?  No.  Very confident in that guess!  Then again maybe I'm TOO confident.  Need some hubris.  Or less hubris.  I kind of know what hubris is talking about but I forget if I'm supposed to be Pro-Hubris or Anti-Hubris.  Less hubris.  I need less hubris in this scenario.  I LTURQ and now I know!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Been using de-odor-ant every day.  A little bit more than I started off!  Started off rolling each armpit up and down 4 times.  With each up and each down being a single thing and not a half thing.  Now I'm up to 8!  I want this de-odor-ant to be pronounced.  Everyone's gotta know to associate me with Smelling Good.  Otherwise what's the point.  The point is I don't get why global, multi-national food corporations make products just for Canada.  Other countries want Coffee Crisp, too!  What the Hell is wrong with you.  I guess now Nobody wants it.  Otherwise they'd still be making it.  What the Hell is wrong with you WE NEVER EVEN HAD A CHANCE TO TRY IT.  What are you dumb or something.  Anyway.  Air Quality is Excellent again today.  Wow!  So the news isn't all bad.  Gotta imagine they're overselling the air quality quality.  I bet it's a cover up.  Air Quality is actually bad.  Hmm.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Then I get to take a walk or something.  I don't have all the details.  Anyway I know I was making fun of my Dad for presumably thinking it's the end of the month 45 minutes ago but NOW, AT THIS POINT, kind of is the end of the month.  That 45 minutes makes a world of difference!  Not sure why I bothered with saying that.  Not sure of a lot of things these days.  I like coffee flavored ice cream.  It's brown like chocolate but coffee like coffee.  Why.  I dunno.  I thought it out and then typed it.  I knew what I was doing the entire time.  And I still did it.  Go figure!  Haven't had chocolate ice cream in a while.  Yes I have.  I had a chocolate fudge pop just last night.  Yeah but that's different.  That's a Fudge and a POP.  Fudge isn't Chocolate.  Pop isn't Ice Cream!  I dunno I think fudge IS chocolate and Pop IS Ice Cream.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  I'll be back soon.

I'm Sorry You Feel That Way

    Hello friends.  Gotta write some more paragraphs now.  Maybe try to make them good.  Nah I'm not gonna do that.  Maybe hope they turn out good somehow.  There we go that's more in my wheelhouse.  Tires are houses for wheels.  Right?  I don't know how cars work.  ALRIGHT WROTE FOUR OR FIVE SENTENCES TIME TO TAKE A BREAK.  Hmm.  What can I do as a break reward.  Hmm.  The reward is worse than... the thing... that earned me the reward!  Anyway full disclosure-- I thought about it some more and I realized I had the fudge pop two nights ago-- not last night!  Last night I had a Fiber One Brownie before falling asleep.  USUALLY I go with a Frozen Snack before bed but I felt like something different last night.  Possibly on account of it being cold.  It was cold in my room last night.  Probably on account of it being cold outside!  Gotta balance that out with a room temperature snack!
     Makes sense.  Also let's be honest this fudge pop wasn't frozen.  I could easily bite into it.  Didn't hurt my teeth like I was biting into ice.  YEAH.  LET'S TALK ABOUT IT.  We just did.  OH.  OKAY.  The fun part about having a frozen snack before bed is when I wake up there's a stick on my night table that I get to throw out in the garbage after the fact.  It's kind of fun.  I don't mind it.  Whatta joy.  I've talked about all this before.  And I'll talk about it again.  Because my life never changes.  Great.  I know I'm not supposed to do meal talk but I can't contain my excitement-- I think I might have A BAGEL later this week.  HOLY CRAP.  I forgot all about bagels.  Delicious!  Also are Bagels Bundt Cakes?  My guess?  YES.  ABSOLUTELY.  But that doesn't matter right now.  What matters is should I use cream cheese or butter.  Leaning towards butter!  Almost always regret cream cheese.  Rarely regret butter.  Butter is harder to spread.  More work.  Gotta do it more carefully.  But it pays off in the end!
    Sure.  I could have that bagel today but NO THE TIME ISN'T RIGHT.  What else is going on.  Today is National Fast Food Day.  Bagel isn't a fast food.  I JUST TOLD YOU it takes time to spread your spreading on it.  Takes time to toast it as you're gonna wanna do.  Then again bagels can be fast food if you go to a deli type bodega place.  They do it quickly.  Hmm maybe I should do that.  Waste of money when I could make it myself but they know what they're doing!  Gonna be more delicious because Someone Else Did It For Me.  That's the plus of being a co-alpha male.  Other people make your bagels for you and you get to enjoy the fruits of THEIR labor.  Delicious.  Unless they spit in your cream cheese.  Which you have coming if you're being a jerk with your status.  What else is going on. 
     Hey Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Octopuses think with their tentacles.  Wow.  Never heard that before!  Also the more I get repeat facts the less I believe them.  Maybe you'd believe something more if you keep hearing it.  I believe it less!  If it was true they wouldn't feel the need to be so pushy with it.  It's kinda suspect that they keep going out of their way to insist it's true!  Anyway what else is going on.  I'm not lying when I'd say I'd enjoy these snapples a lot more if these facts just didn't exist.  I'd enjoy them roughly equally if there were No Facts or if there were New Facts Each Time.  About a wash.  But there being repeat facts makes my enjoyment level PLUMMET.  Also, honestly?  Probably would enjoy Just Snapple slightly more than Snapple With Original Facts Each Time.  I want to focus on the snapple and now I'm focusing on Reading and Thinking.  NOT GOOD.  Anyway.
     Hey that was the fourth paragraph?  I was thinking it was the third!  Now I only have to write one more this act.  And all I had to do was spend 3 paragraphs talking about how I like bagels.  Hmm works out great for me in the end.  Culminating in When I Actually Have That Bagel.  Hmm.  Only bad thing about bagel for a meal is it's slightly less hunger-satisfying than most of your other standard meals.  Unless it's really packed with cream cheese.  Or some other sort of spread.  Oh well this is the life we chose.  What else is going on.  You get a bagel with cream cheese from a deli you're not getting a bagel with a layer of cream cheese.  You're getting a cream cheese sandwich on a bagel.  Which is good if that's what you're comfortable consuming healthwise!  Delicious!  Anyway.  Time to take a bath.  I guess I'll be back soon.

Now I Don't Know What To Think

    Hey!  Time to write the last several paragraphs of the day.  Got a bit of snapple left.  Got orange soda.  Got coffee coming up halfway into the act.  Let's Go!  Pretty sure if they're accessing my phone remotely for some reason to prepare me for New Phone they'll be able to see my browser history.  Very embarrassing!  I go to pornography websites and I don't know if anyone else does this but I do and I don't want anyone to know about it!  But then again if they don't access my phone I won't be able to duplicate my contacts.  And there's probably several phone numbers that I need!  Then again it'd be nice to have a fresh start.  All this clutter in my phone clutters up the mind as well!  Clean Phone, Clean Mind.  That's what I always say.  Also gotta keep my new phone from getting smudged!  Smudged phone, smudged mind.  That's what I always say.  Also bits of rubber shouldn't come off the new case I'd presumably be getting!  Whole case, whole mind.  Always said!  By me!
     Sure.  Is there a cool Indie Phone I can get.  I feel Apple and Microsoft are too conformist for me.  I'd like to go with a brand that I could brag about to my friends that I'm Into.  Hmm is Linux still a thing.  Gonna have to look into whether Linux was ever a thing.  Also am I bragging about a brand I'm into towards  my friends.  Or am I bragging about a brand to Friends Whom I'm Into.  I like the second one.  Suggests there's sexual attraction going on.  Might be a one way street but that still sounds good to me!  Wonderful.  Also any One Way Street is potentially a Two Way Street if one of you is comfortable breaking the law.  Hmm.  Gonna have to think about that one.  One of WHO exactly.  I dunno.  Either you or some other jerk in a car.  Anyway what else is going on.  Got Coffee #2.  Got Snapple #2.  Snapple #2 Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- "Ketchup was once sold as a medicine."
    That's how confident I was that I was gonna get a Repeat Fact that I would have nothing to comment on with.  If I thought I was gonna get a new fact to talk about, I'd have started the next paragraph with it!  I knew a Repeat was coming so I ended the last paragraph with it.  YEAH.  I definitely got this one once before but maybe it was one you didn't see???  I dunno.  The point is who cares.  What kinda stuff do I got in store for the rest of the day.  Gunna do At Least The Bare Minimum of looking into getting a new phone.  That's what I'm comfortable committing to as of now!  Hopefully and Probably I'll go a step or two beyond the bare minimum.  No guarantees though!  Anyway.  I think they say you can get booster shots that are different from your first shots.  But I'm sticking with Pfizer.  I have BRAND LOYALTY.  I'm a Pfizer Fella through and through.  Don't hold me to that.
    I dunno why I had to say that.  I don't think you were actually gonna hold me to that.  But I figured it couldn't hurt to make my feelings known more explicitly.  Anyway.  Penultimate paragraph.  Also I'd buy ketchup as a medicine.  It tastes disgusting.  So it can't be a Pleasure Food.  Must be a Health Medicine.  Think where it's like a parody of The Sacklers and opiod crisis but with John Kerry's Wife.  There we go.  That's a joke.  ONE JOKE DOWN.  I was wondering when I would get to a joke this month.  November 16th.  Also I didn't make no joke.  I supplied the components for you to do it yourself.  This is an IKEA type scenario.  The point is what else is going on.  Got six British Episodes left of Tales From That Crypt current cycle through.  Great.  Glad we covered that.  It's important for History to remember.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  Gonna take my next walk more or less when I would take it even if I wasn't behind schedule a bit.  Which will give me plenty of time to do the bare minimum of working on getting new phone.  But at some point I the bare minimum is taking too long I might have to just cut what I was doing halfway through.  I could be making good progress and talking to someone and working it out but if it crosses a certain amount of time I might have to go ACTUALLY SORRY FORGET IT.  I'LL START OVER AGAIN NEXT WEEK.  That's life I guess.  How do you make a fortune selling ketchup.  Who needs it.  It's just tomato innards and sugar, right?  What's the big deal.  Anyway the point is the entry is over.  I'll see you tomorrow.

-1:41 P.M.

Monday, November 15, 2021 

I've Got Lots Of Thoughts

    Hello friends.  What's going on in the wide word of sports.  Another week of New Phase Of Diet down.  Great!  Weeks are one of the best ways to measure time.  Can't argue with A Nice Week.  Possibly I was brainwashed by Barenaked Ladies to feel this way.  Probably was brainwashed by Barenaked Ladies to feel every way that I feel about every thing.  Sounds about right.  Anyway pretty cold day today!  I like it!  I dunno whose calling the shots re: The Weather but today being cold works out great.  Also is it possible God could just blow on us to cool us down from global warming.  That should do the trick.  Sometimes when people blow it's hot air.  Not God!  He blows cool air 24/7!  Fair enough.  Look just build more refrigerators.  How hard is that.  Anyway.  Shaved yesterday!  Went okay.  Feel like it wasn't as close a shave as last week even though I did everything the same.  Still not bad!
     Anyway.  That's where the expression close shave comes from.  Because you were close to cutting your throat.  Anyway.  I think it's pretty impressive that Shaving may or may not cut my lip slightly but knows never to slit my throat.  It knows where it's not a big deal to cut me and where it would be a big deal.  Good stuff!  I don't mind getting tiny bits of hair on my shirt and/or other clothes.  I can leave the house with that and people would be like hey he just got his haircut or something.  What a great guy.  Never been more impressed by anyone ever in my life.  That sort of thing.  The point is today is the middle of the month and no one can argue with that.  Maybe you can.  I'd like to hear that argument!  Sounds interesting.  E-mail it to me somehow.  I forget my e-mail but maybe you know it.  Hmm.
     HEY gotta get my new phone this week.  Must be done before New Years!  Take care of it once and for all.  Maybe not for all.  ONCE at least, though.  Cool.  Nice to have a tiny bit of stubble for facial hair.  Hey this guy's facial hair isn't offending me BUT I can see that he CAN grow facial hair so good for him.  Everybody wins in this scenario.  So says me-- the guy observing.  What else.  Anyway.  Beard and moustache toupees.  Thoughts?  Gonna have to see if I could copyright that idea.   Maybe take it to Shark Tank.  It's called Shark Tank because a Shark Tank was a Great Idea.  Before that all these sharks were loose.  Finally we got them contained.  In a tank.  Anyway.  Sharks can't drive tanks.  Maybe they can.  I don't know that much about sharks!  Or tanks.
     Hey great wonderful.  Sharks never scared me because I don't go into the ocean.  Problem solved.  Also dunno how people in movie theaters can get scared by Jaws.  Look you're clearly safe in a grounded movie theater.  You are in no danger from sharks right now.  It's just moving pictures on a screen.  Unlike all those other horror movies where you ARE in danger.  The Exorcist.  Maybe you're about to be possessed by the Devil it could happen!  No reason he can't go into crowded movie theaters.  JAWS though Cannot.  Is it possible Jaws was possessed by the Devil and that's why he was evil?  My guess?  PROBABLY not but of course we cannot say for certain.  What else is going on.  Devil possesses animals.  Devil possessed snake.  I read a history story about it.  Hmm.  Gotta watch out for That Devil he's quite a trickster!  Who knows what he'll think of next!
     Fifth paragraph!  Also I thought of that not the Devil.  Maybe he thought of it too.  But I got it FROM ME and NOT from the devil.  NOT a great entry so far.  But then again when is it.  Sometimes.  I figure somewhere between 30-50% of entries in 30-50% entries aren't so bad.  Hard to say for sure.  If I could just know one thing in life it'd be where each entry ranks on the A through F scale.  Also probably other things are more important.  But that's still one thing I'd really like to know each day.  Just gotta estimate it myself and that's no good.  Maybe ask the Devil.  NO that'd be a great opening for him to possess me.  He does me ONE favor-- grades my entries-- and then I'm ripe for the picking!  Possession Picking!  And I'm not falling for THAT TRICK again!  Maybe God'll grade my entries.  Do me a real solid.  Why not he's God he likes doing people favors.  Hey great time for coffee.
     Also it would be a real kicker if I ask the Devil how the last entry was and he goes It Was a, "D."  Now he's got my soul AND I feel shitty about my entry.  What a terrible scenario that would be!  How come Devil possesses people but God never possesses people.  Maybe he does what do I know.  Not a lot.  HEY I got coffee going on delicious.    I bet Devil has tried to possess God and then God has tried to counter-possesses Devil.  Sounds like fun.  Do God and Devil consider themselves equally powerful.  Or is God like yeah The Devil is a worthy foe but lets be honest I'm a step or two above him.  And the Devil might feel the same way or the opposite.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Either way I forget.  Anyway.  If Nietzsche is right and God is Dead I really hope the Devil died before him.  Otherwise we're stuck with Only The Devil and that's no good!
     What a shitty paragraph.  I blame THE DEVIL.  He didn't possess me to write a crappy paragraph but he was the subject matter and it was boring because he's boring!  Moving on!  Monday huh.  I can, "Dig," that.  I don't much choice in the matter so I might as well get on board with it.  More like on BORED with it.  No.  Wait.  Sorry.  More like On Board with it.  That's what I meant to say.  Apologies all around!  Huh.  Up to the last season of Tales From That Crypt current time around.  The British season!  This time I'm paying more attention to it and it's not so bad.  Also all these episodes are kind of new to me because except for one or two I never paid much attention to them.  Too BRITISH.  I can't relate to these stories.  Their sensibilities are different than mine!  Also that's a British novel.  Sense and Sensibilities.  Better look into that one.  YEP checks out.  Kinda sounds like a weird dumb joke name for a British Novel.  That's what I was hoping for.  But nope it was real.  Oh well such is life.
     Eighth paragraph!  It was written by Stone Cold Jane Austin.  What else is going on.  Austin is in Texas.  What was she doing in Britain.  Hmm.  What does The Devil do with souls he's acquired.  Just put them in the bank?  What can he really accomplish or get out of A Soul.  Is it just currency to him.  And if so what's he buying with souls.  Maybe he's trying to buy his way back to Heaven.  Once he gets 500 million souls he can be like to God okay you can have their souls now JUST LET ME BACK IN.  And God is like Hmm that's a lotta souls gonna have to think about this one.  FINE IT'S A DEAL.  And then those people who sold their soul to the devil are back in Good Graces!  PLUS they got the benefit of whatever they got out of selling their souls originally.  So basically them who sold their souls to the devil are coming out of this Better Off Than Anyone!  Amazing. 
    Well they had to go through part of eternity with the Devil owning their soul.  Gotta imagine that was unpleasant while it lasted.  What else is going on.  How's the AIR QUALITY today.  EXCELLENT again.  Sounds good to me!  Not sure what the scale is exactly but Excellent sounds pretty close to the top!  Had another breakfastcentric meal last night for dinner.  I have no regrets!  It was delicious!  I have some regrets!  Could have been healthier!  I have mostly Not Regretting It over Regretting It!  Excellent.  How's voting rights going.  Oh they're not doing it.  Because they don't care.  Gotcha.  Good update!  They should Gotta Care About Something.  Lots of stuff going on in the world.  Too much!  Just pick at least SOMETHING to care about.  Plenty of good choices!  Also lets pick SEVEN OR EIGHT things to care about.  It's fun!  Because that way we can accomplish nothing by being overwhelmed by everything.  Sounds vaguely fun I guess.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I choose to care about ASTROWORLD.  Wait no I don't.  That's one of the things I care least about!  Look we gotta rank things and that's near the bottom SORRY.  Other issues are trampling all over Astroworld Issue.  SORRY.  How is that an issue.  What are we gonna do, raise Trampling Awareness?  YES.  FINE that's a worthy cause I guess.  Not my priority though!  Holding people responsibility is an issue.  Maybe there's people who should be held responsible for Astroworld.  FINE.  Astroworld is the primary issue.  But once we're done with that WE'RE GETTING TO SOMETHING MORE IMPORTANT.  That's the deal!  What else is going on.  Is it possible Astroworld Trampling was instigated by Astros losing in the world series.  And that upset people.  And led them to feel at concert tomorrow night I'M GONNA TRAMPLE MY BAD FEELINGS AWAY.  In which case kind of major league baseball's fault?  Anyway.  I'll be back in a little bit.

Finally The Middle

    Hello friends.  Have one sipsworth of cold coffee left over.  Gonna have it SOON.  Not right now.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  Anyway.  Just drank it.  Anyway.  I think I'm happy with How Shaved I Am upon further introspection.  Anyway.  Worst part of shaving is when you're just starting.  I Don't Know Where To Start!  I got hair ALL OVER MY FACE.  the chin.  The sides.  The moustache.  The neck.  WHERE DO YA START THIS IS IMPOSSIBLE.  Just gotta start somewhere and keep going!  That's what I've learned.  Also the hair is SEMI LONG HAIR.  You might need to go over it several times.  SO you don't know where to start and you don't know how long to stay in the same place.  This is tough stuff.  HEY National Food Day Today.  Let's check it out.  National Bundt Day and National Raisin Bran Cereal Day.  I'd eat some Raisin Bran.  Probably have had it a dozen times in my life.  That's all I got.  Also they specify Cereal. Not just ANY sort of Raisin Bran.  Gotta be in CEREAL form.
    Sure.  I don't know what Bundt is and I don't care to find out!  Kinda feel like I wouldn't like it.  Best to remain silent and thought an idiot than to find out the food is something you don't want and remove all doubt.  Hmm.  Maybe I should look up what Bundt is.  That way I can get another three paragraphs out of this.  It's just some sort of cake shape.  From what I gather it's just the shape of the cake.  It's like a ring.  Anything else is up to interpretation.  In which case delicious I don't know what I was thinking I'm on board with Cakes.  HMM when was the last time I Had Cakes.  That's a tough one.  I'll have a cupcake at some point. They're like cakes but in the form of cups.  It's like a cup you can pour water in but you eat it.  And its made out of cake.  And there's no reservoir for water.  I guess you could hollow it out.  Good luck with that.
    See we got a paragraph out of it.  Which is good and bad.  Good-- one less paragraph to write.  Bad-- Devil Told Me It Was a, "D-."  Devil doesn't like bundt cake.  Only likes Devil Foods Cake.  He gets off on it being named after him.  Sounds fair.  Also solid 75% chance Bundt cake is a kind of cake and not just a shape of cake.  But I don't wanna hear about it.  I like imagining WOW ANY CAKE I CAN IMAGINE.  Don't narrow my imagination down.  You JERK.  What else is going on.  Any Savory Cakes.  Not sure how that would work.  Sure there's savory cakes but they're not real cakes.  You got Crab Cakes for example.  Yeah but I want a savory cake that tastes and looks like and is made up of the same ingredients as dessert cake.  So basically I want to eat cake as a main course.  YES FINALLY SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS ME.  Me!  It's always the person you'd least expect.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  I can, "Dig," that.  Maybe.  HEY BREAKING NEWS it looks like I'm eligible for booster show.  ABOUT TIME.  I'm gonna be LIVING LARGE soon.  Hmm.  Hope I feel sick for a day or so afterwards.  Nice mini-vacation from feeling healthy.  Anyway gonna have to look into setting that up or finding a walk in or whatever they do these days with shots.  In MY Day we had to set up appointments at places that were 40 minutes away.  Kids these days have WALK INS in neighborhood stores and they can get as many as they want and they probably get stickers as rewards.  So basically I'm gonna look into getting a shot somewhere that will give me a sticker as well.  A shot could be called a Sticker.  Stick you with the needle.  Just got my booster sticker.  That sort of thing.  Rather would have a real Sticker than the shot.  But if I can get both that's even better!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Where's that Raisin Bran I ordered.  Too late now anyway I already had breakfast.  Yeah but I can eat tomorrow's breakfast now.  No rule that says I can't!  What else is going on.  I don't know how or why my parents watch White Teenage Murderer Trial all day for weeks.  Why would you want to see Injustice Happen.  Do they think that at some point there will be glimpses of Justice?  Maybe if they were watching MONEYBALL like I was they would see it!  David Justice shows up in a couple of scenes.  But they're not!  They're watching Injustice Trial where Judge Is Impartial.  Anyway what else is going on.  Wait.  He's PARTIAL.  Impartial is what he's not.  Oh that makes sense.  Anyway guess I'll take a bath today.  No motivation to mix it up with a shower.  Just go with the standard bathing experience.  Be back soon.

No Way Am I Reading This

    Hey!  Watched most of Willy Wonka &/V the Chocolate Factory yesterday.  Feel bad for the actors who played the Oompa-Loompas.  The audience is like HOLY SHIT THAT'S CRAZY WEIRD LOOKING.  OUT OF THIS WORLD!!!!  They're just dwarfs with wigs and face paint on.  Oh well that's life.  At least they got a job I guess was my main impression.  The actors.  Not the characters.  I don't feel much about the characters because I'm pretty sure they're not actually human.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  Charlie breaks the rules too!  Every other kid breaks the rule and is punished and disqualified from inheriting the factory.  Charlie breaks the rules but gets away with it!  GIVE THE FACTORY TO THE TV KID.  What's wrong with him.  So he likes TV a lot.  Who cares. 
   Also Charlie's last name is BUCKET.  Dumb name!  Dumb name, dumb kid!  DISQUALIFIED.  Anyway Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- A rhinoceros horn is made of compacted hair.  Great.  Why are these all about animals.  Mix it up a bit.  If you want it to all be about animals at least be up front and honest about it.  Say Real Animal Facts.  Now you just look lazy that you can't think of any other things.  How about some Philosophy Facts.  Snapple "Real Fact #769," GOD IS DEAD.  That's one way to go is the point.  Anyway do I have any thoughts on this rhino fact.  Hmm.  Compacted hair.  Great.  Sounds kind of gross.  Also rhinoceros don't have horn.  That's dumb.  Well they do.  But they don't have HAIR.  THAT'S dumb.  Well they do.  But their horns aren't made of hair.  That's DUMB.  Well.  Hey time for some coffee.
     Sure.  What else is going on.  Entry might have been a bust BUT I get to have TWO MEALS today.  Already had a decent micro breakfast.  Now we got not one but two REAL MEALS.  Get to do some other stuff.  Watch some Curb That Enthusiasm.  Maybe take a klonopin.  The point is I forget.  Man oh man would I like to know exactly what grade this entry was.  But the only person who could tell me is The Devil.  No Deal!  NO DEAL DO YOU HEAR ME.  Probably.  Devil probably reads this.  Gets some good ideas for how to torture people.  What kinda stuff to say.  That sort of thing.  The point is maybe I should make a Pay Wall so the Devil has to pay me to read this.  Hmm maybe he can pay me in souls.  I'd take some people's souls.  Dunno what I'd do with them.  First instinct is to Free Them or something.  But then again that's the ONLY thing I can think of.  I'd have to look into what my other options are exactly.
     Penultimate paragraph.  What's the big deal about going to a chocolate factory.  You might get to eat chocolate?  Guess what!  You want some chocolate, just go out there and buy a chocolate bar.  What if you want MORE chocolate.  Buy another chocolate bar!  You can even get a different kind of chocolate bar the second time!  This isn't that complicated.  Anyway I'd eat a chocolate bar.  When's National Chocolate Bar day.  Better LTURQ.  Looks like DOZENS of Chocolate SOMETHING days.  But no Chocolate Bar day.  Hmm.  What National Food is February 29th.  Let's LTURQ.  NONE.  Let's make that Chocolate Bar Day.  You heard it here first.  Also what gives me the right to make a National Food Day?  FIRST COME FIRST SERVE.  No one else claimed February 29th?  I'm doing it RIGHT HERE RIGHT NOW.  Chocolate Bar Day.  BOOM.
     Last paragraph of the day.  Also I get royalties every time it's February 29th.  Sounds fair.  Maybe there was a Candy Bar day.  Better LTURQ.  NOPE.  I searched just, "BAR," and there were five hits but they were all Barbeque Related.  Wonderful.  I guess.  One was National Dive Bar Day.  One was Peppermint Bark.  I don't know why I lied and said they were all Barbeque related.  It seemed easier than going into further detail.  Sorry about that.  Anyway.  Can bundt cake be a chocolate bar in the shape of a ring?  My guess? YES ABSOLUTELY.  Hmm.  That seems like a terrible guess.  Oh well too late to change it now!  What else is going on.  At some point I'm going to coincidently and/or semi-coincidently eat the food that is the National Meal Food Day Food.  It may not even be the next 365 days.  But at some point in my life odds are it's gonna happen!  Amazing.  Unless I die soon.  Then the odds DECREASE DRAMATICALLY.  Amazing.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:10 P.M.

Sunday, November 14, 2021 

I Gotta Think Of Something And Fast

    Hi friends!  Back here for another fun filled day filled with fun.  What kind of stories do I have accumulated of Today.  Thought it would be colder for my Walk!  Turned out to be several degrees warmer than I thought.  Either Scientifically or In Feel.  So that SUCKED.  Too warm!  Then again it means I definitely won't need my winter jacket for rest of the day which is great.  Winter jacket sucks.  I like sweatshirt jackets!  I like the part with the hood.  I put my hood on, people around the neighborhood know I mean business.  I'm not someone to be taken lightly with my hood on!  Then again I don't wanna go too far and make anyone feel uncomfortable.  They can know I mean business without being upset about it.  That's the sweet spot I'm aiming for!  Huh.  Watched Jungle Cruise last night.  I liked the part where I watched the entire thing.  That took up some time.  Well done!
     Anyway.  Also has Dwayne Johnson EVER had to answer for What The Rock means.  Look Rock can mean dozens of things.  AS WELL AS, "THE."  We need to know his personal intention!  Also has... lemme LURQ who his female co-star was... calibrating...  calibrating...  has Emily Blunt EVER had to answer for what Emily Blunt means.  Off the top of my head some sort of marijuana reference.  That would make The Rock a crack-cocaine reference?  I guess so.  The point is what else is going on.  Going without onions another day.  Doesn't seem right!  Can someone figure out a way that we can eat onions AND QUICK?  Thanksgiving is coming up!  Everyone knows Onions are a classic Thanksgiving side dish.  We eat these Onions on Thanksgiving because they're bitter herbs to remind us of the suffering the Israelites did in the desert.  Something along those lines rings some sort of bell.
     What else.  I feel like every Judeo-Christian should celebrate Passover.  What, Christians, you don't like Moses?  You gotta be a fan of Moses too!  CELEBRATE IT you idiots it's fun.  Wasn't the last supper a Passover Cedar.  I'd look into that but I don't wanna end up on a list somewhere.  Hmm.  Probably on lots of lists already.  Algorithm lists.  I don't think I'm on too many People-Put-Together lists.  But I gotta be on thousands of algorithm lists!  So I got that going for me.  Maybe being on lists will work to my benefit.  Also did the movie make me want to go to Disney World and ride the Jungle Cruise ride?  YOU BET.  I bet there's parts of it where you get SPLASHED with water.  I'd travel to the ends of the Earth to be on a log flume type situation and get splashed with water.  That sounds like the best thing that could happen to me ever.  Hmm something must be wrong with me that I feel that way.  Yep that checks out there's probably lots of things wrong with me at the same time to make me feel the way.
     Anyway.  National Food Day.  Let's look at it early in the entry!  NEVERMIND.  There were four National Food Days listed on the website.  Four!  TOO MUCH NEVERMIND.  You just cancelled each other out I hope you're happy with yourselves.  Anyway what else is going on.  Wait lemme double check if one is Onions.  NOPE.  Four foods and not a single one of them is onion based.  Whatta gyp!  What else is going on.  Gonna shave tonight.  Great.  Dunno why I set it up to do it at night.  So I got something to look forward to during the day or something.  I don't have all the details!  Hmm maybe one of the meals today is National Shaving Day To Eat.  Probably not.  I'd be very very surprised if that were the case.  Partly because it's not food and partly because I read it 2 or 3 times already and didn't absorb it completely but I'd remember if one of them was Eating Shaving Yourself.
     Fifth paragraph!  Amazing.  HEY had a new Snapple Patriotism Fact with Snapple #2 yesterday.  It was something along the lines of Bullfrogs are the only animals that never sleep.  Good.  I'm happy for them.  Well I'm not happy they feel the need to stay awake all the time.  But I'm sure they're used to it and don't mind that much.  Now show me the animal that's ALWAYS asleep.  Gotta be some animal that is never awake.  Well maybe The Queen or something.  Obviously some of the species needs to be awake to accomplish stuff to keep them alive.  But a small subset of the animal can survive without being awake ever.  WOW.  Whatta deal!  In this imaginary scenario.  Do animals dream.  My guess?  Yeah probably.  I'm sure science has looked into that.  Science has nothing better to do!  We put a man on the moon and isn't that enough.  Coffee time!
     Have we put a woman on the moon yet?  I don't think we have!  Lemme LTURQ.  Nope.  No woman on the moon.  Sorry ladies!  Had ZERO problems bringing coffee up to my room While Walking.  Wasn't even a concern.  Amazing.  The point is if I write to snapple complaining about turkey's/turkeys do you think they'd give me some sort of reward?  My guess?  Nope.  If anything they're gonna give me a PUNISHMENT.  "How dare you question us We're Coming For You," is the sort of thing I would expect.  Anyway what else is going on.  Anyway did a triple circle walk in my room last night instead of 2 separate OutsdieWalks.  Dunno why!  Just didn't feel like having to go to the bathroom and deciding whether I wanted to stop off in Starbucks or not.  It's a hassle!  I can't make it a habit though.  Walking outside is the only way to walk is my opinion!
     Sure.  Maybe googling woman on the moon put me on a Space Algorithm.  And now they're gonna want me to be an astronaut.  Sure why not.  I'd be an astronaut.  It's a lot of hard work but it'd keep me busy and feeling productive.  Also presumably I get to move to Houston and help effect positive change politically from the inside.  Everyone listens when astronauts talk!  They've been to/are going to/know people who have been to or are going to space!  WOW SPACE?  NOW You've got my attention!  What crappy paragraph is this.  Crappy seventh paragraph?  Yep!  Amazing.  The point is at what point do we Gerrymander Space.  I guess we first have to colonize Space.  Then once we've got people living there, first thing we do is gerrymander districts.  Makes sense. 
     What's going on.  Else.  What's going on Or Else.  Without going into too much detail, I got just the one BreakfastCentric meal last night.  WHEW GLAD WE CIRCLED BACK TO THAT.  The point is GREAT!  Instead of having 2 in a row last dinner and today's lunch I can have a NORMAL MEAL for lunch and have that second breakfastcentric meal for dinner tonight!  HEALTHY.  I thought I wasn't gonna go into too much detail.  Look it was too much detail from the start.  We're already past the point of no return.  That's life I guess.  Used to get omelets a lot.  Maybe have had one omelet in the last 6 months!  Go figure.  I can't get an omelet tonight.  Healthiest best option is Lox Eggs and Onion.  ONION NO GOOD.  Then again I don't want that anyway who cares this is dumb.  I said I wasn't gonna go into too much detail and now it's the entire paragraph.  GOD DAMNIT.
     Ninth paragraph!  Wonderful.  THIS IS GOOD STUFF.  SOME GUY'S OMELET FREQUENCY.  NOW MY LIFE IS BETTER FOR READING THIS.  That's you.  Also  THIS IS GOOD STUFF.  THE GUY SAID THE THIS IS GOOD STUFF THING.  WHERE IT WAS ME TALKING.  THIS IS EVEN BETTER STUFF THAN THE IMAGINARY ME WAS SAYING.  That's YOU.  Anyway.  What's the best meat omelet.  My Mom used to make me salami omelets.  That's a classic for me.  Can't go wrong with things you ate as a child.  Because it reminds you of being a child.  And when you were a child your life was better as far as you know.  Children don't have troubles.  That's how I feel.  Sounds about right.  Also the best meats to eat with eggs are better separated and not combined in omelet.  Bacon, sausage.  HAM could be combined with egg properly I don't have a problem with that.  WOW.  NOW THIS HAS BLED OVER INTO A 2nd PARAGRAPH.  This is why I stopped doing MealTalk.  I gotta re-apply myself.  I've been getting sloppy!  Recommit myself to NO MORE MEALTALK.
     Last paragraph of the act.  What else is going on.  Hmm I happened to notice the weather website said the air quality today was EXCELLENT.  I've never noticed this variable before.  I dunno if Excellent is Every Day or relatively novel.  Either way I'M PUMPED.  I WISH I could really breathe it all in way more than necessary BUT COVID.  Still unsafe!  Gotta be reserved with my breathing no matter how high the air quality.  GOD DAMN COVID.  Anyway.  Easter is around Passover.  That's evidence I was right about Last Supper being Passover.  Looks like I was right about at least once thing these 10 paragraphs.  I LIKE those odds.  Also are North Easters: The Storms related to Easter.  My guess?  SHUT UP I DON'T LIKE IT.  What else is going on.  I wonder if I'll live long enough to enjoy taking walks in the park in the evening next year.  My guess is it doesn't FEEL like that will happen but I probably WILL make it.  NO reason to think I'll be dead.  But I can't particularly easily imagine being alive, either!  Anyway I'll be back soon.

This Is Working Out Great

    I've talked about what does The Rock mean before.  Probably several times!  But I haven't received an answer yet so I guess I have to keep bringing it up.  Hey anyway the point is Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day.  Maybe it's what The Rock means.  Let's see.  Octopuses think with their tentacles.  I already knew that.  You already told me that.  This isn't new information to me at all.  Great.  Also  I was always led to believe it was octopi.  I guess I was led wro... wait a second octopi is accepted as a word too.  Guess you can choose your own adventure with plural octopus.  Sounds too good to be true.  I'm suspicious of this!  Anyway THAT'D be a better fact than this tentacles thing.  That's how I feel!  Also Merriam Webster Through Google says THERE IS A THIRD ACCEPTED SPELLING Octopodes.  I think they're lying but what do I know.
     What else is going on.  Have a little bit of cold coffee left over from First Act!  That hardly ever happens.  Delicious!  Just finished it.  Delicious!  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Maybe Snapple thinks people are buying snapples for the facts.  So if they get a repeat fact all that means is they're gonna buy another snapple in desperate search for a new fact.  Makes sense.  People ARE Dumb I'll give them that.  What else.  It's the last day of the weekend.  Oh no!  Tomorrow is Monday!  I, like everyone, hate Mondays!  Now daytime TV is Different.  I don't watch Daytime TV at all but it's there weather I like it or not.  That's my first thought about Why Mondays Are Bad.  Makes sense.  Re-watched Moneyball yesterday.  Makes sense.  I think when I first saw the movie 10 years ago I was like well yeah of course the Analytics people are right.  They're the protagonists.  Protagonists must be right.  Now I realize hey half OR MORE of Baseball People probably watch this movie and are half-like THOSE IDIOTS.  And I'm not a baseball person but I value their input so I'll have to consider that for myself.
     Anyway.  ANALYTICS is MATH.  Math is SMART.  SMART PEOPLE BELIEVE IN ANALYTICS.  Case closed.  Open and shut.  Check Mate.  The point is what else.  I get to have another cup of coffee soon.  Coffee has CREAM in it.  ARTIFICIAL SWEETENER.  Gonna be SWEET.  Sounds about right.  Not saying anything controversial or disputable there.  Anyway today is November 14th.  I feel like the 14th of the Months is something.  I might just be thinking 14 days is a fortnight.  Could easily be what I'm thinking of.  OR maybe the 14th of November is something and/or the 14th of other month and/or months.  Gonna have to look into that one.  No I don't.  I don't have to do that at all.  Fair enough.  Hey great what else.  14 is half of 28.  That's what February is sometimes.  Great I think we figured that one out.  That's what I was thinking of.  Of course.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Gotta imagine there's been something worthwhile this entry.  I don't know what it is but there is SOMETHING I said SOMEWHERE that was like hey that was pretty good.  I like those odds!  Let's check out Patriotism Calendar.  Any Patriotism Days coming up.  Hey Chanukah is on the 29th!  I assume the first day.  That's great.  I'll celebrate by Trying To Remember Celebrating It As A Kid.  It was fun!  You think it's fun to get presents in Christmas MORNING you don't know the true joy of getting presents IN THE EVENING when the sun goes down.  Way better!  You IDIOTS.  Anyway.  We did the whole thing with the menorah!  For my entire childhood!  Maybe up until I was 12 or 13.  Then my parents sat me down and said we don't actually believe in God and neither should you.  And I was like oh okay gotcha.  But the point is it's fun when you're a kid!  What, Chanukah or Believing In God.  Both of them!
     Last paragraph of the act.  My impression is My Mom doesn't believe in God, and my Dad kinda does!  Good for them.  I hope it works out for the best for each of 'em.  Probably mentioned that before, too.  Anyway.  I don't gotta bother thinking about whether I believe in God.  Who cares.  I just hope other people are getting what they want out of believing and/or not believing.  What else is going on.  OH HEY I just remembered the Snapple Fact from 2 days ago I forgot.  It is impossible to tickle yourself.  So of course I immediately tried AND SUCCEEDED.  Bottom of my foot.  That's my ticklish area.  And I tickled myself IMMEDIATELY with no special effort.  I guess there's degrees of being tickled?  I'm not going out of my mind being tickled by myself.  But there's SOMETHING going on I can say that much.  Anyway time to take a Cleansing Experience Break.  Be back soon!

Chew On This For A While

    Gum.  Hey what's going on time for the third act of the entry.  CLOSE to drinking coffee but still 2 paragraphs away.  What do I got going on for these two paragraphs.  Thinking about Chanukah.  Miss it!  I was a kid then and we've already established that kids only have positive experiences.  Gotta imagine I had some shitty Chanukahs.  Getting home from school waiting a few hours lighting menorah getting presents but for some reason I Feel Crappy the entire time.  I dunno what made me feel crappy when I was a kid!  I'm sure I had lots of reasons.  Even on Present Holiday Days.  Maybe I got a shitty gift and or gifts the day before.  Pissed off about that!  Also what was the proportion of Gifts I Knew I Was Getting and/or Picked Out Myself to Gifts That Were Surprises.  I feel like after being six or seven I was picking out my own gifts maybe 80, 85% of the time.  Great!  Makes sense.  I know what I want better than these idiots (my parents).
     What else is going on.  Surprise gifts could be good too!  Sometimes you don't know what you want.  You can't even imagine certain gifts off the top of your head but your Gift Giver might be aware of them.  So there's that.  What else is going on.  I feel like since there's no Santa Claus for Chanukah we should just say GOD gave you these gifts.  God went to Toy's R Us to buy you NBA JAM 97 for Nintendo 64.  Then God wrapped it up and hid it behind the couch.  Sounds about right.  Now I like God!  Before I was on the fence but if he's buying me video games then he sounds like a pretty good entity.  What else is going on.  Also there's no explicit premise for Chanukah where it's like if you're bad Santa won't  bring you anything.  I mean, look, if you're a shitty enough kid your parents may not get you anything.  But no one bothers to make a point of it is the point.
    Hey got coffee and Snapple #2.  Snapple #2 Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- "Lizards communicate by doing push-ups."  That's a new one!  It makes no sense and I don't believe it but at least it's new.  I don't buy the communicate.  I don't buy the push-ups.  I don't buy the lizards!  You put them all together and I literally don't believe a word you're saying.  Oh well that's life.  At least I get to enjoy the snapple juice-water.  And the coffee I poured!  And the last of the glass of Ginger-Ale I had from before.  Delicious Delicious and Sufficiently Tastes Good.  What else.  I don't think religious people take Chanukah that seriously.  It's mostly for the kiddies is the point.  I mean sure they'll go to temple and they talk about the Maccabees sufficiently and Hey Great It's As Good As Any Other Sermon.  But it's not a huge holiday that's a big deal.
     What else is going on.  I know when you shave you're supposed to shave opposite the way the facial hair is growing (I THINK I know that) but I get bored and start shaving in all directions.  This isn't going fast enough maybe if I mix it up I'll get the hair shaved quicker.  I have very little patience is the point and if something isn't working for me the right way I'm gonna do it the wrong way!  Makes sense.  No it doesn't.  People shouldn't live their lives that way.  Stick with the right way!  Makes sense.  Anyway.  Getting close to being done with the entry.  Then I have a whole day before me.  It's not before me it's after me.  That makes sense too.  The point is I forget.  Maybe if I think with my tentacles I'll remember.  Hmm.  Gotta grow some tentacles.  I got fingers and toes.  Those are the closest things I have off the top of my head.
     Last paragraph.  Imagine if Octopi had tentacles with opposable thumbs.  Then they'd really be in business.  What else is going on.  Gonna lay in bed and watch TV for an hour to an hour and a half!  Watch the Saturday NL episode.  That's exciting!  They do different sketches within the same broadcast.  Sounds accurate.  Also I don't have to watch the commercials.  By which I mean when they do commercial parodies I don't have to watch them.  Whose gonna make me YOU?  I hope not.  I enjoy my freedom in terms of watching what I want to watch.  You start telling me with authority what I have to watch and suddenly I'm in a position I'm not comfortable with!  Anyway time to wrap up the entry.  I accomplished a lot today!  I might have said 5-6 things worthwhile by accidental luck.  Amazing!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:26 P.M.

Saturday, November 13, 2021 

Hello Welcome To My Website

    What's going on friends.  Time to write another entry.  The Morning!  The point is I caught a glimpse of last entry when starting this one and how many times do I need to say, "If I was Hitler I'd Be A Better Person Than The Real Hitler."  I've said it at least twice this month.  What's going on in my mind.  Hmm gonna have to look into that one.  Anyway what else is going on.  Got a nice Regular Day planned for today.  Yesterday was irregular!  First half of day was lots of CircleWalk.  Then later in the day during OutsideWalk it was way too warm!  Upsettingly warm!  It was comfortable sure but at the same time I felt THIS IS WRONG.  That's life for ya.  Comfortable Sure but also This Is Wrong.  What do I got going for me today.  I feel like my facial hair is starting to grow quicker.  Great!  I feel more like a man!  Which is a good thing.  I've been a Boy most of my life and the last few years it hasn't reflected well on me!
     Sure.  Was a toddler for too long, too.  Didn't go from Toddler to Boy until I was 11!  Go figure.  Anyway you'd think logically it's in my head that I'm growing facial hair faster.  You may be right.  You may be wrong!  You may not have thought that in the first place.  You probably don't think about anything while reading this other than PLEASE GET ME TO THE END ALREADY.  That's kind of what I'm constantly thinking about during this!  About 60% what's going on in my mind the entire time.  Anyway I don't care what my Dad says about the middle of the month only being the 15th.  The 13th is the middle of the month.  See now I'm a man because I'm Challenging My Father.  A Boy would just shut his mouth and accept his Dad's impression of how much of the month is in the middle.  NOT ME.  I'm standing up for what I believe in even if it means going up against my Father.
     Okay.  I'd be a good Hitler.  Disagreeing with my Dad over month middles.  Playing all the latest greatest hits this entry.  Today is Saturday.  Love it!  That means during afternoon walk I don't have to walk through dozens of teenagers from nearby high school.  I don't mind them personally, I just don't like knowing they must think I'm one of them.  But at the same time I'm self conscious to wear my NYU Sweatshirt/Sweatshirt Jacket because they might think I'm showing off.  HEY this guy is in college what he thinks he's better than me?  And/or HEY this guy is PRETENDING he's in college what he thinks he's better than me?  I don't want to offend anyone!  Anyway.  These teenagers from this high school this year are okay!  I've seen jerkier teenagers.  I can maneuver around these teenagers easily and they're not rude or anything.  I don't like the COPS stationed at the street though.  HEY teenagers are around LET'S STALK THEM.  Don't like the cops!
    In teenagers versus cops I'm always on the teenagers side even if they're jerky teenagers.  Unless the teenagers are committing crimes.  Then I guess we need the cops to step in and put an end to that.  Ugh.  Hey it's the fourth paragraph!  Amazing.  Also I was a weird quiet kid in high school.  Now's my chance to redeem myself!  APPEAR to be a COOL TALKATIVE (Just Not Right Now At This Moment) fake kid in fake high school on the street.  There Fixed My Past it's about time.  Now I can move on with my life.  About time!  I've been sitting around for fifteen years waiting to move on with my life.  Anyway.  Also everyone knows Quiet Kids are the Coolest Kids.  I was SO COOL I was keeping it all to myself.  Can't share this with anyone else I need all of it for me!  I can't get enough of myself and whatnot!  Sounds about right.
    Specialized High School is different because I think most people go into it with the premise None Of Us Are Cool.  But of course there's still the same levels and tiers and groupings of cool/popular sets as in every high school.  That was my impression at least!  NEVER TALKED TO ANYONE.  Dunno for sure what social life was like beyond my 6 foot radius!  I was socially distancing before it was cool is the point.  Also now that it's cool not social distancing enough.  I want high school kids to think I'm cool and a rebel.  I'm gonna walk by people a foot and a half away from me!  NOW I've got their attention!  Also I know how far six feet is.  It's about 6/5 Of Me's.  That's the kind of math you learn when you go to Specialized High School.  Being able to GENERALLY ESTIMATE off the top of your head.  I don't like this entry so far.  I don't think I've earned coffee.  Oh well what can ya do.  Use coffee to write BETTER second half of act. 
    Makes sense to me.  Lots of  things make sense to me.  Even things that don't make sense.  I have a pretty high tolerance level for Things That Don't Make Sense.  Hmm.  Sounds like I don't mind walking around teenagers in the afternoon at all.  Sounds like I kind of enjoy it.  Look we're all friends at this point so it's nice to be with friends.  I'm sure if I spend enough time on the street I'll make some enemies but that's a problem for later!  Oh right the cops.  They're my enemies.  Leave these kids alone they've done nothing wrong.  Maybe they have.  Maybe there's crimes being committed every day and I don't know about it.  Could be.  The point is the cops should be arrested for loitering.  Is it legal to arrest a cop.  I'm gonna have to look into that one.  Pretty sure that's a tricky gray area of the law.  Also is it legal to Teenage a Teenager.  Of course.  It's even encouraged.  I think teenagers should teenage each other all the time!
   I've talked about this all before.  And it was Nothing then.  Now it's Double Nothing.  Which is a double negative for a negative so it's a positive.  Wait no.  Double negative for a negative is still a negative I think.  Hmm.  SAVE ME SPECIALIZED HIGH SCHOOL.  Is, "Nothing," inherently a negative.  It's No Thing.  That's zero.  Zero isn't negative.  Hmm.  SAVE ME SPECIALIZED TEENAGERS.  What else is going on.  It's SATURDAY.  I gotta write a crappy entry.  You wanna get through it quickly and move on with your day.  Do crappy entries go quicker?  Probably.  You get the sense it's crappy at some point and it isn't gonna get any better and then you Speed Read.  Maybe.  Why not.  Maybe crappy entries take much longer.  You focus real hard sentence to sentence I MUST FIGURE OUT HOW TO MAKE THESE WORDS WORTHWHILE.  IF I SPEND ENOUGH TIME ON THEM IT WILL ALL MAKE SENSE.  Good luck with that is the point.  Thanks For Trying!  Really!
     Eighth paragraph.  I guess.  HEY I got an entire Over Half The Entry left.  Let's go.  I feel like Kids should be hanging on the street on Saturday afternoons too.  It's fun!  Lots of stores on this street.  You may wanna go into one and get a snack.  Go into another and get a coffee.  Lots of options.  Then hang out on the street and enjoy what you've acquired.  Also Cops aren't around on the weekend!  You can get away with God Knows What.  Also when cops are hanging out around streets near high schools on week day afternoons that means they're taking cops away from some other posting.  So all the kids need to do is to find out where these cops would have been otherwise and hang out there!  Unsupervised!  Cracked that code.  Anyway.  What else is going on.  Maybe the reason these kids aren't jerks is because cops are there.  Without cops the teenagers would feel more free to be the jerks they are in real life.  Nah.  I think these teenagers are just Good People.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Maybe these teenagers are jerks and I'm just seeing the best in them because I WANT TO BELIEVE.  Or maybe they're jerks and I'm just talking them up because I wanna get on their good side so they'll be my friend.  Maybe they're jerks and I'm just completely desensitized to jerks that I can't tell a jerk when I see one.  The point is what else is going on.  LOOK one negative is if I have to use bathroom at Starbucks on Afternoon Weekday walk.  Probably packed with teenagers.  The store AND the bathrooms.  For some reason I usually need to use the bathroom halfway through walk on evening walks though.  Every single evening walk I do.  Rarely during afternoon walks.  I guess there's reasons for that.  All that drinking I was doing throughout the day really accumulates by night time.  Something like that.
     Wonderful.  Is it time to set the clocks the other way yet.  No of course not it hasn't even been a week.  It'll be at least one full week until it's time.  Okay but it'll be a week in less than 24 hours.  Well we'll re-calibrate then to see if it's time.  Okay fair enough.  Wonderful.  I feel like people should make up their own time zones as they please.  If I want this week to be three hours behind last week then that's my business!  I mean SURE people CAN already do that.  No one is stopping them.  I can set my clocks however I want.  Hmm.  Gonna have to think carefully about What I Want To Accomplish with Making My Own Time.  In the meantime what else is going on.  Also I think time zones should be divided Horizontal on the map not vertical.  Thoughts?  Anyway.  What part of South America is in Eastern Standard Time.  Let's LTURQ.  Looks like we got some Columbia.  Ecuador.  Peru.  Nice sounds like good company to me.  I'll be back in a little bit.

Now I'm Talking To You

    Great.  Time to write some more paragraphs.  Thinking about getting 2 separate BreakfastCentric meals to eat in a row tonight dinner and tomorrow lunch.  It's not healthy but it's delicious.  Also it's kind of healthy.  Gotta eat something!  Otherwise your health will evaporate over days.  I don't think we give enough credit to unhealthy food.  We literally could survive with it but not without it!  Anyway.   Is it too late to register metaverse dot org.  Gotta imagine they got the .com and the .net but they might not have thought of the .org yet.  Hmm should look into that as soon as possible.  Also is it a pun because of the word MET.  And you're MEETING people-- digitally?  My guess?  Sure they can lean into that if they felt like it.  They can do whatever they want.  They have more money than almost anyone.
     Makes sense.  Look, I'm spending all my energy trying to mentally talk myself out of getting two breakfastcentric meals in a row.  I'm probably gonna succeed in not doing it.  But boy would that hit the spot.  What spot.  The main one.  The one for hitting.  Anyway.  Still not save o have onions!  Whatta gyp.  I want some onions and I WANT THEM NOW. And by NOW I Mean FOR TOMORROW'S LUNCH.  Also, no telling how I'll adjust my clocks over the early morning tomorrow.  Now might END UP BEING Tomorrow's Lunch!  So there's that.  Anyway if no one is getting onions that means there's gonna be a surplus of Relatively Healthy onions.  Because no one is getting even the healthy onions.  So it's safe for me to get onions because they'll use up the relatively healthy onions first.  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.
     Sure.  Also maybe I'm being served onions from last year.  Ever think of that?  Then I'm totally safe!  Anyway what else is going on.  Got a nice Cleansing Experience coming up.  I'll totally be cleaner afterwards than I was going into it!  Probably.  That's the premise I'm operating under.  Watched Kevin Garnett documentary last night.  I like watching documentaries about Basketball!  It's a fun sport and when I watch documentary they really hold my hand through it in terms of being able to get a sense of what's going on.  Yeah I get it THE HOOP is the enemy and you want to attack it with the ball.  I NEED MORE CONTEXT THAN THAT.  What else is going on.  I'd like to see some Football Documentaries.  Maybe a hockey documentary-- that'd be weird!  Baseball I don't need.  I already know about baseball!  I could MAKE a documentary about baseball and show it to others that's how much I know about baseball.  Hmm that sounds liek a challenge.  I'M ON.
     Whatever.  Not only should I only get one breakfastcentric meal, but I challenge myself to get THE SLIGHTLY HEALTHIER ONE.  Hmm.  Sounds like I'm coming out on top in that scenario.  I'm eating slightly healthier AND I'm Winning A Challenge.  Perfect.  Maybe I can make my own onion from home.  Do I have the ingredients and/or the tools.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  What do I got in store for the rest of the day that isn't food or walking.  Waiting for food.  Waiting for walking.  Cooling off after food.  Cooling off after walking.  Sounds great.  Doing American Psycho exercises all the time.  Can't forget about that.  Also the Original Film Psycho was American.  Sounds like you're not differentiating yourself enough by calling yourself American Psycho.  Maybe 1980's Stock Broker Type Person Psycho.  Not sure what his job is exactly.  Better LTURQ.  Investment Banker.  That's a Stock Broker type person.  He invests in banks or something.  I don't have all the details.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Maybe Investment Bankers are more American than Hotel Operators.  Sounds dumb to me.  Hotel Operators are the bread and butter of American Life!  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Gotta different brand of gum this week because my brand wasn't available.  EXCITING.  It's fun to try new things!  Flavor is the same Word but obviously each brand is gonna make it slightly differently.  Different texture before it turns into Just Gum.  I dunno why I don't mix it up every week.  Didn't occur to me!  Now it does!  Gonna have to remember this.  DAMNIT I dunno if I can remember things.  It's been a while since I had to remember something.  Can't remember the last time!  But then again I wouldn't, would I.  Anyway what else is going on.  Time for bath!  Be back soon. 
  

I Talk To Lots Of People

    Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- "Only Male Turkey's Gobble."  WOW YOU DON'T SAY.  What else is going on.  National Food Day of the Day-- "National Indian Pudding Day."  Not sure what Indian Pudding is.  Better LTURQ.  At first I thought that sounds bad then I thought hey that might be good then I thought actually no it sounds DISGUSTING.  Now let's see what it is Once And For All!  Molasses and Cornmeal.  It's a dessert pudding!  I was imagining a savory pudding.  ALSO NATIVE AMERICAN Indian.  Didn't see that plot twist coming!  Pretty sure we don't call them Indians anymore!  I guess no one has thought about This Food Day in 50 years so they haven't gotten around to updating it.  Anyway kind of want a savory pudding now.  What else is going on.  Are there savory puddings.  There must be.  I didn't invent it this paragraph.  I'm not that clever.
     Yeah!  Coffee after this paragraph.  It's all coming together.  What is.  Today.  Oh, okay.  What else.  I was talking a few days ago about how one day I'm gonna take a bath and my hair will be long enough that I need more shampoo or something.  That day was TODAY.  Today compared to yesterday my hair is just longer enough that Shampooing is a somewhat new endeavor.  Compared to yesterday.  Today!  Amazing.  I had a new-to-me Snapple Patriotism Fact with my 2nd Snapple last night.  What was it again.  Hmm.  Something about an Animal or something.  Maybe I saved the cap.  Lemme LTURQ.  Nope!  Didn't save it!  I considered going through my garbage to look for it bu--- ACTUALLY YES I did go through my garbage to look for it.  I was gonna cover that up so you don't think I'm an Animal or something.  I just moved a few food wrappers on the top around!  Anyway I didn't see it and I felt alright I'm not going any further with this.  I've done what I'm comfortable with and now I just consider the Snapple Cap lost forever.  Hey coffee time.
    Poured coffee right up to the top of the mug so I was transporting it carefully not to spill it.  And I actually had the thought I'm Walking Pretty Well right now not to spill it.  Pretty cool I'm this good At Walking.  So there's that.  Decent at being a walker!  Look I figured walking out by the time I was SEVEN.  I've had this down pat for a good while now!  ALSO amazing I have slightly more coffee than normal.  Negligible amount, sure.  But NOT THAT negligible.  When it comes to something being negligible this is on the significant side of negligible.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Gonna have a nice break between Entry and Walk.  Also this upcoming walk is EASY STREET.  No balancing act at all.  Just do what I do all the time.  Barely gonna have to think about it at all!  What else is going on.  Any American Indian Meal I know and enjoy.  Not including just food that was indigenous to America and now we eat all the time.  Hmm.  I'd eat some American Indian bread.  Not sure if I ever have or not.  But it sounds like it would be great.
     Penultimate paragraph!  I believe They Call It, "Naan."  Wonderful.  Watched JAWS II yesterday.  It was okay!  I was able to follow the movie And Not Hate It.  Also this Jaws looks just like the last Jaws.  Maybe it was the same Jaws.  I wasn't paying attention enough!  I thought they killed Jaws in Jaws I but what do I know.  Not a lot!  I know only Mal Turkey's gobble.  WAIT THAT'S NOT TRUE.  I could gobble!  I'm not a Male Turkey.  Hmm but CAN I REALLY?  I might be able to Mock Gobble.  But can I technically actually physically gobble?  Now I'm not so sure.  Not 100% sure what a gobble is.  Some sort of Mouth Sound.  That's as far as my knowledge extends.  I probably can't gobble.  Oh well.  Lots of things I can't do!  Lots of things I can do.  It all balances out in the end.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Amazing.  I would have called Jaws II, "JAWS II: BACK IN ACTION."  That's all I got.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Also parody anti-Semitism movie JEWS.  Maybe it's not anti-Semitism.  Maybe it's made by and for Jews!  And it's Pro-Semitism!  Gonna have to look into that one.  Do sharks really rise up out of the water to bite things.  Seems like a lie.  Fish can't leave the water!  Let's LTURQ.  YEP SOME SHARKS CAN.  Good for them.  The point is the shark can just bite the bottom of the boat to destroy it and then the delicious people on top of the boat will sink into the water.  Easy!  Not sure if I can watch Jaws III anywhere.  Also I assume The Jaws Franchise is like The Rocky Franchise.  Sometimes Jaws loses, sometimes Jaws wins.  But even if he loses it's usually a moral victory.  Hmm.  Hey the entry is over!  Be back tomorrow.

-12:19 P.M.

Friday, November 12, 2021 

I'm Looking Forward To This

    Friday morning!  Decent chance I'ma have to pause Act I to accept Super Market Delivery.  But it's worth it in the end because I Get To Get Things From Super Market.  Also what's going on.  Kyle Rittenhous still on trial.  His name sounds German.  Like Nazis.  He's like a Nazi.  To be fair he's a Nazi YOUTH.  Get off his back about it!  Gotta imagine once you've killed minorities they promote you to Just A Nazi.  In which case I'm sure he's very proud of himself.  So he's got that going for him!  Also KYLE?  Rhymes with HEIL.  This kid doesn't know when to quit.  If I were him and people were chanting Heil Hitler to me I'd be like That's MISTER HITLER to you.  Also I'd stop being the Hitler Hitler was being.  Do some good things instead.  That'd be my first instinct.  Also kinda feel like Hitler was all about Critical Race Theory.  He just approached it from the other way?
     What else is going on.  Down to my last glass of soda for the week!  Still have enough Snapple to last me the next hour or two though if needed.  So I MADE IT.  Whew.  Anyway what kind of great shirt am I wearing today.  Similar to yesterday's shirt but not quite!  The point is I enjoyed Master & Commander.  Not sure who the Master was and who the Commander was.  WAIT A SECOND.  Maybe the Master IS The Commander.  The same guy is both!  Either way I liked the shipboating.  It was fun because it made me realize these guys are common laborers and they all know how to do much more things than I do.  I couldn't shipboat if my life depended on it!  Maybe if I was given enough time to learn!  If you said a year from now you gotta know how to shipboat And Your Life Will Depend On It I feel like I could use that time to get shipboating down.  The point is Wonderful.
     Anyway.  Not 100% believable movie though.  I don't buy that boats could float that well in water.  Doesn't seem true.  What else is going on.  I'm also halfway through another Nautical Themed Movie The Abyss.  I like it okay!  I liked the first third where nothing crazy happens.  Now it appears that some crazy stuff is happening and I'm not sure I'm On Board with that!  Also On Board is a shipboating phrase.  If you're on board that means You're Alive On The Ship and if you're not on board it means you're in the water about to drown.  Sure, makes sense.  One of 20 books I was supposed to read that I didn't over the Queens College English Major Years was the Edgar Allen Poe book about The Sea.  Adventures of Pym Or Something.  Not sure what happens but it does take place at sea.  Also not sure why he put Or Something in the title.  I mean I Love It but I doubt most people in the world would get it.
     What else is going on.  Pretty sure Edgar Allan Poe invented being spooky.  Before him it never occurred to someone to do that.  Now everyone does it!  I don't.  Well it's about time I started!  Maybe you find this website spooky.  It's CREEPY because he's WEIRD and KIND OF DOESN'T EVEN KNOW IT.  He kind of does kind of doesn't!  Makes it even spookier!  Yep I could see how that might be the case.  The point is what else is going on.  I shouldn't have bragged about taking Klonopin soon after entries and it helping me.  Now it doesn't help me as much!  I got in my head too much about it!  Thanks a lot.  Thanks for nothing!  Now I have to take TWO.  DAMNIT WHY DID I SAY THAT.  Now I'm gonna have to take Thre-- FUCK NOW I'LL HAVE TO TAKE FOUR.  This keeps getting worse and worse.  The entry I mean.  And my life.  Many things in the world are getting worse and worse.  Sounds fair.
     Yeah!  My parents are upset I took their hand-soap-dispenser for my bathroom sink.  Apparently we have two tiers of soap dispensers.  The ones they use and the ones I'm allowed to use.  And I'm not entitled to their slightly better soap.  TOO LATE I ALREADY TOOK IT.  Now whose the idiot!  Some other guy, not me!  What else is going on.  Not 100% buying that they could sail from Europe to America in as early as 1492.  I'm a 1492 Truther.  I dunno what the truth is.  I just know What The Lie Is.  What they're telling us!  Sounds about right.  LOOK I've played the video game Civilization II.  Your ship goes beyond land by 1 or 2 squares it's gonna get lost at sea.  And that's just 1 or 2 squares!  We're talking about a whole ocean!  Hmm.  I hate losing ships at sea!  I was really hoping to sail across the sea until I find more land.  That was my idea! 
    What else was my idea.  Lots of ideas I thought I had this entry were repeats.  I have that idea a lot.  Knowing something is a repeat is the biggest repeat of them all!  Anyway I got coffee now.  Halfway through the act without having to pause!  Also still got most of my glass of soda left.  Basically I'M DOING OKAY IN LIFE.  Sure.  Patriotism Fact from 2nd Snapple yesterday was another repeat.  I don't know what's going on.  It doesn't surprise or upset me anymore.  Well, it upsets me a little.  But at this point I'm mainly just CONCERNED.  What's going on and is there anyway I can help.  I'm not GOING to help.  But knowing I COULD would be nice.  Because that means someone else can as well.  And maybe they'll take care of it for me.  Whew that's a relief.  What else is going on.  Maybe it's a Monopoly Game At McDonalds scenario.  The Nothin' Wins are way more common than the Super Wins that actually get you something.  I'm getting the Dumb Facts that everyone gets and I need to keep buying Snapple to get to the Good Facts.
    Sure.  That makes sense.  As much sense as anything these days am I right. Nope!  Wrong!  Most things even these days make more sense than that.  Oh okay great.  Look I like Commanders and Masters as much as anyone but that was a terrible title for the movie.  Never in the 16 or so years since it was released was I ever like hey I wanna see that movie based on that title.  The EXACT opposite.  I was completely turned off!  No wonder it only made over 200 million dollars.  Bad title!  What else is going on.  I'd like to make over 200 million dollars.  All in all I think it would have a positive effect on my life.  Sure great what else.  I know it's a common thing for them to hire people to punch up the scripts of movies.  Can I be a guy who punches up titles?  My guess?  No.  Actually I dunno! Maybe a very rare thing but possible once in a blue moon.  Gotta get my name out there if I want that job.  And my name BETTER BE THE BEST NAME THEY EVER HEARD.  This is the title their basing my entire titling abilities on.  If I get this one wrong they'll NEVER hire me!
     Wonderful.  I guess!  Was raining lightly halfway through walk.  Hopefully that goes away for next walk!  Or at least doesn't intensify.  I like taking walks when it's not raining too hard!  TOO is where I draw the line!  Which is a shipboating expression.  People always drawing lines on ships for various reasons I can't get into right now.  The point is these ships are getting hit by cannon balls all the time and they can just brush it off and keep going?  I don't get it.  If your ship can survive 40 cannon balls than I gotta wonder what the purpose of those parts of the ships that got cannon balled were in the first place.  Either it all matters to the shipboating enterprise or none of it matters!  Or apparently some of it matters more than others. And some but not all things you can survive being damaged or even destroyed.  GET OFF MY WEBSITE.  Anyway that sounds like fun but DON'T DO IT.  I'm gonna write more so you better read more OR ELSE.
    Cool.  The only way to stop a bad guy with a cannon ball is a good guy with a cannon ball.  Or maybe a neutral guy with a cannon ball.  I feel like if you're truly neutral you might err on the side of law and order and use your cannon ball to stop the bad guy.  Sounds fair to me.  I think it looks like The Mets found a guy who was like sure I'd be your GM and they were like THIS IS THE GUY.  First person who didn't turn 'em down.  Sounds good to me.  That's how my dating life might go if it ever begins.  Except instead of GMS it's significant others.  Anyway.  Kinda cruel term.  What, everyone else is an INSIGNIFICANT Other?  What makes you and your significant other so high and mighty.  WE MATTER TOO YOU JERKS.  That sort of thing.  Also the movie about me and my future significant other's relationship will be called Master and Commander.  We'll have to wait to find out how that applies exactly! 
     Last paragraph of the act!  Looks like I'll make it before accepting Super Market delivery.  Raining harder now.  May have to do some CircleWalking today.  Don't anticipate liking that!  But maybe I'll get a kick out of it if I can find the right thing to play on the Television Set at the time.  Oh well that's life.  CircleWalking was originally a Shipboating exercise.  They couldn't walk that far otherwise they'd be bothering the first and second mates.  So they had to walk in a small circle if they wanted to walk at all.  And Boy Did They.  Huh.  Maybe just walk in the moderately hard rain.  It's not gonna kill me.  It might!  Probably won't though!  I Like Those Odds!  Anyway I was wondering what I would do in however long the period of time it is between Act I and Super Market Delivery.  Now I know!  CircleWalk!  I'll be back in a little bit.

I Don't Know What It Is

    Hey!  Been a while.  LONG while.  I got in a lot of CircleWalking just now and I feel like my mind is mixed up a bit.  Positively mixed up!  Neutrally mixed up!  Kind of negative!  The point is it took a long time for Super Market order to get here so in the mean time I did a Triple CircleWalk (which counts as a Double RegularWalk).  Which works out because of Rain.  When Rain is done later in the day I can resume Normal Walks and it all evens out.  The point is I covered everything That's The Point.  Let's see what Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day is.  Hawaiian Alphabet one again.  This is just sad.  I'm embarrassed for Snapple?  They look TERRIBLE based on my whistleblower campaign exposing their Much Less Amount Of Facts Than Advertises.  Are we entitled to some class action lawsuit settlement?  My guess?  Probably not!
     Oh well that's life.  Gotta be entitled to something.  A free snapple or something.  I WANT A FREE 12 PACK OF SNAPPLE.  EITHER THAT OR I'M GONNA KEEP FIGHTIN' YA ON THIS.  We'll see how that negotiation threat goes.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  Had a lot of time to Think On Things during long CircleWalk.  Forget most of what I thought about.  I remember watching the last third of The Martian at some point.  Kinda was thinking about that movie.  Hey check this out plot is going on good for them.  Those kinds of thoughts.  Also gave me some time to really think about what I wanted for lunch.  Right now I'm going in a completely different direction than I thought I was going in before the CircleWalk.  I feel like it's a change for the better.  Healthier and potentially more delicious!  So I accomplished something.  Still writing the same old crap but my lunch will be better.
     Okay.  I feel like it's a mixed bag of when I say thank you to people who are delivering me things and then just about to go on their way and them acknowledging me.  But Super Market deliverers I feel uniformly don't respond to me.  Maybe they think I'm being sarcastic or something.  They don't believe I'm really thanking them and I'm being a jerk somehow.  Maybe they're the jerks.  Maybe they're doing Silence Fast for some reason.  Either way maybe it's on me to be more aggressive.  If they don't respond within three seconds I should go HEY ASSHOLE LISTEN I SAID THANK YOU.  THANK YOU.  YOU HEAR ME?  THANK YOU.  I can't let people walk all over me.  In the form of not accepting my thanks.  Maybe I should try being jerks to them.  Someone delivers me something and turns around to leave, I go hey fuck you buddy.  And then they go not a problem have a good night!  Maybe that's how the world works.
   Not a great act so far!  Also not a great month so far!  Still got the majority of the month to turn things around.  Gonna have to do A LOT of Circle Walking to get into a new and better headspace to turn things around!  And I'm probably gonna do No Circle Walking in the immediate future.  So it's not looking very promising!  The point is I will have a bathing experience relatively soon.  That looks very promising!  In terms of it's almost definite that it's an accurate prediction.  The QUALITY of the bath is anyone's guess.  All that matters is that I rightly called it ahead of time.  Amazing.  Thinking about Issues that bother me during CircleWalk.  WHY THE HELL CAN'T THEY PASS VOTING RIGHTS BILLS.  IT'S ALMOST AS IF SOME OF THEM DON'T CARE IF OR EVEN DON'T WANT DEMOCRATS TO WIN ELECTIONS.  It's funny cause it's true.  And it's true cause it's funny!  Wait not that last part.
     Last paragraph of the act.  I don't believe it!  Also today I know ahead of time nothing great will come of finishing the act.  I know what I got in store for me when I'm in my room and not writing Acts.  Lotta nothing!  Still though it'd be nice to Do Something.  Something isn't done until it's completed.  So I have Done Nothing yet today.  Sounds about right.  Anyway.  The Martian isn't very realistic because it takes place in the future.  How do we know the future will even exist?  I'm not convinced!  I'll need to see more evidence and then once I've seen that evidence I'll need to see even more evidence.  Not buying what they're selling!  Also what are the odds that one of the first astronauts on Mars will be the actor Matt Damon.  VERY low.  Very unlikely.  Anyway hey the act is over.  Be back soon!  Also it used to bother me that there's s Matt Damon and a Matt Dillon.  Okay NOW the act is over.  Be back soon!  Hmm apparently based on my phrasing It Doesn't Bother Me Anymore.  Yep that checks out I've accepted it by now.  Okay NOW the act is over.  Be back soon!

It Could Be Nothing

    Wonderful.  Time to write the last few paragraphs.  Then take a nice break.  Then take first OutsideWalk in a while.  Today is Friday.  What do I got in terms of weekend plans.  Plans?  WEEKEND?  Terms?  GOT?  The point is I got nothing going on.  Oh Hey let's LURQ what National Food Day it is.  HAH.  Two of 'em.  One is boring-- National French Dip day.  Great I don't care.  Other one-- "National Pizza With The Works Except Anchovies Day."  I have questions.  MANY questions.  Well not that many questions.  The standard 5, "W's," and the, "H."  Who what where when and why.  And how.  So great that's all I got.  Gotta look into WHO right.  At the very least.  It's origins are a mystery.  Not just to me Right Now.  I already implied that.  The webpage says it's a mystery, too!  But apparently it caught on and people love it.  Well they're dumb but what do I know.  I kinda feel like if you get a Supreme Pizza from Fast Food Pizza they might be leaving off anchovies.  Maybe it's a widely accepted practice that Supreme Pizzas are like ya know what hold the anchovies.  Makes sense.  Anchovies would overpower everything else!
    So the point is I like anchovies so in that respect FUCK THIS DAY.  Bu also can KIND OF see where they're coming from now that I think about it.  So wonderful.  I grew as a person today!  Anti National Meal Day into Accepting National Meal Day.  Also French Dip?  Not 100% sure it is but from what I do know (roughly 60%) I don't think I like it.  Anyway.  Is French Dip some sort of Swimming Pool or Beach Sex Act.  French means sex.  Dip means pool!  Makes sense.  Also how can FRENCH Dip be one of OUR National Food Days?  What The Hell.  Someone messed this one up real bad.  What else is going on.  Also it can be some sort of insult.  If someone is dumb.  You French Dip means You Idiot!  Sounds about right.  Also I am obliged to say the phrase Freedom Dip in this paragraph.  If I never brought it up you would be confused and upset.  Hey great time for some coffee.
     What's going on in the wide world of sports.  Olympics coming up.  Winter I think.  I can't remember what the last one was.  That was MONTHS ago.  Also why no Fall or Spring Olympics.  I feel like track and field should be a fall competition.  I can imagine you doing it over LEAVES.  That FELL from the tree.  Because it was FALL.  Great.  Running on leaves.  Good stuff!  Also you can Run when you're LEAVING a place.  If you wanna leave in a hurry!  Wonderful.  Also maybe you wanna Luge when its warm out.  That's your choice!  Don't let anyone tell you when and where you can Luge.  Ugh.  What's the last Sport I did.  Hmm.  Possibly football.  Football in 2008 with friends in park.  NO.  Personal Basketball.  When I was hospitalized.  Get to throw a deflated basketball up at the hoop.  Almost make it to the hoop!  Forget getting in the hoop, my goal is to get this deflated basketball up to the height of the hoop!
     Anyway.  I played some major league baseball!  On the video game console!  I walked 12 people in a row including 7 hit batsmen but I feel like I did my best and what's what counted.  Anyway.  Getting close to the end of the entry.  That's good.  I think we can all agree that entries are terrible so if we're stuck reading/writing them then getting to the end is the best thing we can hope for.  I don't agree that entries are terrible.  I think they all average into a C-.  And a POSITIVE C-.  I'm happy with the C-!  I feel like it's graded on a curve but a POSITIVE Curve that one should strive to do poorly on!  Huh.  Skiing is just running down a snowy hill on stilts.  Did I need to say that.  Who really needs to do anything these days.  Good counter-point.  The point is hey one more paragraph I can do that easy.
     Let's go.  What else is going on.  Not sure what I'll figure out to settle for putting on the television set for upcoming one hour break.  Maybe an hour long episode of a Television Set Program.  Well Yeah OBVIOUSLY but where would I find a program that has an episode that's exactly one hour?  I dunno on the TV Guide?  Makes sense.  What else is going on.  I took a sneak peak at one of the National Foods for Tomorrow and this is gonna upset some people.  Maybe make other people happy.  Certain to be a source of contention though that's all I can say.  I forget what the food is.  I remember part of the title of the food though.  That's enough to make me feel the way I feel!  Hey if you don't wanna wait until tomorrow you can look it up yourself.  I wouldn't recommend it.  Stay on pace with me!  But hey it's your life I'm not gonna tell you how to live it.  The point is that's it.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-1:56 P.M.

Thursday, November 11, 2021 

Ready To Entry

    Hello friends.  It's that time of day again.  Now.  It's always that time of day!  Except for at night.  Then it's that time of night.  Night ain't day!  We could argue about that sure but why bother.  Today is Thursday.  What a great day!  It's all the fun of the weekend with all he fun of the workweek.  I assume workweek is fun for other people.  Also I assume weekend is fun for other people.  Every day is a party for me!  Anyway my mom is trying to force me to accept a Bed Mat Or Something along with fresh sheets.  It's a package deal!  I don't want a bed mat.  Who cares.  That'll just complicate things.  I don't even know what it's called so how could I want it.  Just gimme them sheets!  Anyway based on presidents talking about it on twitter I'm guessing today is Veterans Day.  OR presidents are just getting a head start.  Let's LTURQ on Patriotism Calendar.  YEP and also Today is Remembrance Day in Canada.  Probably Remembering Our Veterans.  Good for them.  They know what's important.
     Whatever.  Got days for dead troops.  Got days for retired troops.  Any days for Current Troops?  My guess?  Sure.  Any days for improv troupes?  I hope not.  Let's see what the Patriotism Food To Celebrate of the day is.  NATIONAL SUNDAE DAY?  Well I don't like it but what's important is do VETERANS like it.  They gotta share their day with Sundaes every year in perpetuity!  Personally I think it cheapens it and is an insult to Veterans everywhere.  Also personally never had a Sundae, don't WANT a Sundae, not SURE what a Sundae is.  Some sort ice cream but Not The Good Kind I Like.  Oh well what's life.  I mean that's life.  But what's life fits even better!  Gotta remember to start saying that as a transitional phrase.  Oh well what's life.  Makes sense.  Also I assume It's A Horror Movie when National Sundae Day falls on a Sunday.  And if not there ya go great idea.  Just give me one dollar everyone says the title and we're even.
    Yeah!  Why should you give me a dollar every time someone says the title I'VE OFFERED NO TITLES.  Hmm gotta think of a title.  And QUICK.  The Sunday Sundae.  Hmm this is harder than I thought.  Ok NEW IDEA I pay you a dollar every time someone says the title.  Anyway.  What else is going on!  Man oh man is this White Teenager Who Kills People trial upsetting.  My best course of action is Try Unsuccessfully Ignore It.  Or actually Unsuccessfully Try To Figure not.  I'm not TRYING to fail at ignoring it.  Maybe I am.  I dunno what's going on with me subconsciously.  No one does.  If they did it'd be conscious.  CHECK AND MATE.  Speaking of CHECK AND MATE I recorded Master & Commander: The Sea Epic about Boats to watch.  Check and Mate reminded me of it because it has the same cadence as Master and Commander.  And also MATES are on Ships.  They're the name of crew members.  Gotta imagine there's Checks in Shipboating, too!
    Cool.  I assume the protagonist is either Master or Commander and the antagonist is the other one.  I know very little about this movie.  But I like epics!  They take a lot of time to watch and they took a lot of time to make.  We're all wasting a lot of time with this enterprise and I think that's great.  Hey I'm into the fourth paragraph!  That's pretty good.  Solidly better than the 2nd paragraph!  What else is life.  I gotta know what Canada is trying to remember today.  My guess is 80% chance it's their troops.  And they just copied our day because they're stupid.  YEP I WAS RIGHT.  So 95% chance Canada is cramping our style and 5% chance we stole it from Canada.  Hmm.  Stealing things from countries sounds up our alley.  Maybe higher than 5%.  Also very likely we did it at around the same time semi-independently.  Either way Fine Whatever Who Cares.
     Yeah!  All special days are Remembrance Days.  What you mean those other Holidays I was supposed to Forget?  C'mon!!!  Yeah.  I feel like Master may be higher up on the food chain than Commander but personally maybe I'd rather be a Commander.  It's close, though!  Not sure what that means.  I kind of am sure what it means but I don't know what I'm basing it on or whether it's accurate OR whether it's a Real Thought Any Person Should Have.  What else is life.  How's Canada doing.  Hope they're doing well.  Lotta countries been doing pretty crappy lately!  Oh well what's life.  I didn't realize Canada bothered fighting in wars.  Look it's good that they're getting some skin in the game but I don't think Canada is gonna make or break many wars.  But I guess it's the thought that counts.  Also those who died.  Today we Remembrance Them.  Thanks!  I assume Canada has been on our side of wars since the 19th century at least.  Could be wrong.  Canada could easily have been part of the Axis Powers in World War II we don't know for sure and we'll never know for sure.
     Got coffee!  Means I have to put a little more thought whether I wanna take a quick sit-up/push-up break.  That's 30-45 seconds of coffee getting colder!  I do 16 of each at a time.  Takes maybe a minute at most.  I feel kind of like American Psycho doing all these push-ups and sit ups but hey What's Life.  I never saw that movie.  Kinda think there's a thing where he does a lot of push ups or sit ups.  Also Kills People.  I don't do that yet.  Probably never will.  My coffee would get REALLY cold if I'm busy killing people.  Not worth it!  Also if there's not both Masters AND Commanders in your movie I have no interest in seeing it.  Look will I consider it if you have JUST a Commander?  Yes.  Not just a Master though.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  The point is I'm not sure if I'm losing weight, gaining weight, or staying the same with all the push-ups/sit-ups.  Maybe I'll never know!  More likely I'll know based on the next 2 or 3 times I check my weight! 
     Makes sense.  Anyway.  Is there some sort of portable handheld bulletproof shield we can buy to protect our families.  I don't wanna gun to protect my family.  What are the odds that I can intercept the bullet being shot at my family with my own bullet.  Low!  Now if I had a piece of glass I could use as a shield that'd work just fine.  GREAT idea.  Also we can see through the glass so we know our assailant is still there or whether he or she gave up and left!  So if they leave we can sigh and move on with our days.  That sort of thing.  Maybe bullet proof glass weighs a lot more than regular glass.  Hard to carry around.  Who knows for sure.  Some people.  I envy them.  Also don't throw stones with glass houses.  Why not.  Just get some stone proof glass.  Easy.  What else is going on.
    GLASS HOUSES?  Where did this phrase come from.  There's no such thing as glass houses ever in history!  Okay ONE CASE.  In the 2001 film Thirteen Ghosts.  They live in a glass house.  And the phrase pre-dates the movie!  Let's LTURQ if I got the year right.  Could be 2000.  2001 I was right.  Also what a wonderful movie.  I like the part with the ghosts!  Might have talked about Glass Houses before.  Talked about Thirteen Ghosts before.  Solid 50% chance the reason I got to it was Glass Houses.  Anyway what else is life.  I had a conversation with my Dad on whether it's the middle of the month that HE INITIATED.  It was on my mind yesterday and then he brought it up today!  So we had a scholarly debate over what constitutes the middle of the month and neither of us learned anything!  He went away with his initial perspective and Me Mine.  GREAT DEBATE.  Everyone Wins!  Everyone goes home happy.
     Amazing!  Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Anyway today I am faced with the same question I am faced with many days these days-- Kinda know what I'm gonna have for my 2 meals of the day.  But IN WHICH ORDER will I have them.  It's a tough one!  Every day!  And I think I make the wrong decision more often than the right one.  But the important thing is I Feed Myself and Gain Nutrition.  What else is going on.  Had my second Snapple yesterday and it was another Repeat Patriotism Fact.  I think the Mint one.  Too many repeats!  Universe is off kilter!  To whom can I file a complaint about this!  Gotta get universe back ON Kilter.  Hmm maybe I can pass this on to Master and he'll pass it on to Commander.  Sounds about right.  Also I assume that's the source of conflict in the movie.  Master wishes he was commander.  Or just resents the commander without wishing he was him.  Guess I'll have to watch it to find out.  Or read a plot synopsis.  Or settle for Never Knowing.  Those are a lot of my main options.
    I talked about being American Psycho with these exercises before.  It's an accurate representation I guess.  Hmm what horror movie villain can I emulate next.  Kinda wanna kill kids in their dreams.  I could see myself getting into that.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Anyway.  What's today.  Is today the 11/11.  YEP.  Oh right it's the day World War I ended.  That's why Canada and America celebrate maybe?  Also I'm no genius for knowing world war I ended today.  My dad brought it up a week ago for some reason.  Because he was doing something with the days and was like hey when 11/11 comes up that's a lot of ones.  ALSO it was Day world war one ended.  So we settled lots of questions with this paragraph!  Except for how we're gonna title that movie.  What was it again?  Lemme LTURQ.  OH The horror movie where National Sundae Day falls on a Sunday.  Gonna have to think about that some more.  I'll be back soon.

Continuing To Continue

    Hey what's up.  Here we go with some more paragraphs.  Kind of like the ones from before but hopefully slightly different.  I THINK I know what I'm gonna have for lunch and/or dinner.  Cracked the code!  I'm happy with it as of now.  The point is we got plenty of ones in the date and I don't see how anyone can be unhappy about that.  Don't see how anyone can be happy about it either.  If you're enthusiastic about today being 11/11 in regards to the numbers specifically then I don't know what to tell ya.  Also My Dad is enthusiastic about the date because of the numbers specifically.  I dunno how enthusiastic he is deep down.  It's the kind of stuff he likes talking about!  Maybe it's just making conversation.  And inside it means nothing to him.  I have no way of knowing.  Also, 11/11?  EQUALS ONE.  The slash is A Division.  I learnt that in math and so have you I bet.
     What else is going on.  Today is VERDES.  I learnt that in Spanish.  Verdes either means THURSDAY or GREEN.  Let's LTURQ.  Green!  Let's see what Thursday is.  JUEVES.  Both have some of the same letters.  So you could see why I got confused.  I WISH today was Green.  Hey Green Day.  How about that.  I guess subconsciously I knew this riff would end with Green Day.  It wasn't conscious though!  I can assure you of that.  Boy oh boy is it conscious now though!  I can't stop thinking about it!  Because I keep typing about it!  Once I start typing about something else I'll start thinking about something else, too!  Hopefully what I'll be typing about!  That would make the most sense!  Also at what point Do We Reach Green Day.  If we haven't already.  I get the sense that Green Day is something that will happen at some point even if we don't know when or what it is.  Makes sense to me.  Kinda why I said it in the first place!
     Probably talked about Approaching Green Day before.  Probably talked about everything before!  I've written way too many paragraphs over the years such that everything has to be a repeat.  What about New News.  I AVOID that topic.  Too new!  Makes people uncomfortable!  Also you'd think that I'd be repeating the best stuff so it'd be fine to read again.  Nope!  Can't remember the best stuff!  Too original.  Can't think of those things again!  I'm repeating the worst stuff!  Because it's easy to come to mind!  What else is going on.  HEY lets write something entertaining.  Been a while since I've done that.  Here we go.  HMM.  What's the good word on... hmm.  My Dad doesn't think it's the middle of the month until the 15th.  What he thinks there's ONLY ONE DAY in the middle of the month?  Maybe two?  What kind of idiot is he.  That's not FUNNY but now you know my Dad is a Estimation Dummy and You're On MY SIDE.  I hope so.  Maybe you're an estimation dummy, too.  YOU IDIOT.
     Look you don't need to think 10-20 is the middle of the month.  That might be too liberal for you!  But WORK WITH ME HERE.  12-18.  Even 13-17 or something.  We can find common ground if we're being reasonable and acting in good faith.  Not Really.  I'M RIGHT AND I'M NOT BUDGING.  I'll find common ground to get YOU to accept a number closer to my liking than where you originally were. But I'M sticking with 10-20 either way!  YOU IDIOT.  Also 10-20 is kind of wishful thinking.  Is 20 really the middle of the month?  I don't know.  I WANT it to be though.  I WANT 10 to be the middle of the month.  That's how I feel for real inside.  The point is I forget.  I might feel entirely different next month.  Me wanting a wide middle might be specific to RIGHT NOW.  Either way I think I've made my points known.  WAY too known.  Too many points to begin with, too!  Also hey great what else is going on.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Great!  This entry isn't good so far and will probably get no better.  But it's a good reminder hey sometimes things ain't no good.  I feel like I'm reminded of that by 98% of life.  But a little more reassurance couldn't hurt either!  I wonder when the next world war will end.  Hopefully at some point!  If the next world war never ends that doesn't sound good for us at all!  Then again at least we're not Losing.  As long as War Goes On we still could win!  If war ends WE MAY HAVE LOST.  Yes, we got a GREAT track record in world wars (America & Canada) but no guarantee that'll last in perpetuity!  Oh No I'm Scared.  Anyway what else is going on.  Not sure something else can be going on.  Pretty sure there wasn't a first thing that went on.  Hey what's life am I right.  I'll be back soon.

Sure This Will End Soon

    Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- WELL You're gonna be angry about this as I am-- Only Male Turkey's Gobble.  I've seen Real Fact #'s as high as 1500.  THEY LIE.  THEY HAVE TWELVE FACTS.  This is crazy.  Pardon the pun but I'm gonna BLOW THE LID off of this scam.  Don't pardon the pun.  APPRECIATE IT. It's the best thing that's come out of this entry so far!  In fact let's move on from this topic completely so that the last thing we think about it is The Pun.  What else is going on.  Kinda don't even wanna drink the snapple now.  This whole enterprise is tainted as far as I'm concerned.  I'll drink it anyway but I'm not 100% happy about it.  I'm not 100% happy about anything.  It'd have to be insanely great for it to be 100%.  I don't think it's even possible!  At least it means I can't be 0% happy about something.  Probably not.  If I was 0% happy about something That Sounds NOT GREAT AT ALL.
     New paragraph!  Amazing.  Coffee after this one!  Delicious.  Dunno what I'm gonna do exactly with the rest of the day.  Not much obvious things that I would enjoy watching on The Television Set.  I watched Back To The future DVD with commentary a couple of weeks ago.  I can watch Part II with commentary.  Didn't really like the commentary.  Kinda made the movie worse.  They just talked about technical production aspects!  And not even FUN ones.  Either way maybe they were saving all their exciting bits for Back To The Future Episode II Revenge Of Biff commentary.  Only one way to find out.  RESEARCH IT ONLINE.  I'm up to a fine Tales From That Crypt episode.  I watch it a lot!  Not much happens but I like THE AMBIANCE.  Better Look Up Right Quick that that's a word.  Wait.  No.  I'm thinking of AMBULANCE.  I like The Ambulance.
     Getting ginger ale upcoming Super Market Week instead of Sprite.  They were sold out of Sprite!  And honestly I could use a Ginger Ale vacation.  Gonna be good.  The point is what else is going on.  Wearing the same clothes I was wearing before I Took my bath!  Minus my pants and socks.  Those will be put on in a little bit-- same ones I was wearing before.  The point is I started off the day happy with my new fresh clothes and they're still fresh and new enough that I have absolutely no problem going back to them once again.  Also I feel like my neighborhood hasn't seen enough of me in this shirt today.  They got A TASTE but I really gotta drive the point home over the rest of the day this is who I am and this is the shirt I'm wearing today.  And they'll like it!  It's a positive appearance I'm putting out there and it's gonna work out for everyone just fine.  Penultimate paragraph.  Is what will happen.....
     Now.  Amazing.  What else is going on.  Not enough Fiber One Snack Bar and Cookie and Brownies available from this Super Market.  Those are good reasonable snacks and I'm in the market for good reasonable snacks.  Very limited selection now though!  Gonna have to look into other options I have open to me.  This is a reminder.  One day I will return to this entry and this paragraph and be like oh yeah I gotta do that.  This will happen After I'm Dead.  I don't anticipate getting around to it before my death.  So I guess I'll have to do it afterward!  Wonderful.  The good news is I'll have LOADS of time after I'm dead.  Before my death we're talking Decades if I'm lucky.  Afterwards?  So much time!  Too much even!  Might wanna die again further deeper just to pass the time.
     Last paragraph of the day.  Wonderful!  Hey my birthday is coming up.  I don't know if it's getting older or just the nature of the numbers I'm at, but I feel this one year I'm increasing isn't a huge life changing shift.  Almost every year I tend to feel uncomfortable that it's kind of a relevant turn-over.  I turn 27 from 26 THIS SUCKS AND IS A BIG DEAL.  This year?  32 into 33?  Yeah pretty much the same thing I don't anticipate giving too much of a fig about this one.  So I got that going for me I guess.  What else is life.  Now we can easily have a fair and principled debate over whether 33 is early thirties or mid 30's.  I'M NOT PREPARED YET THOUGH.  Gimme some time to put together a case one way or another.  I don't even know where my opinion falls as of now, let alone being able to defend it.  Huh.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:36 P.M.

Wednesday, November 10, 2021 

I Don't Know Why It Matters

    Hi friends.  Brand new day compared to yesterday.  We're talking WEDNESDAY.  People think Wednesday is the middle of the week but have they considered Tuesday or Thursday?  My guess?  Perhaps briefly.  The point is what have I got going on in my life so far.  Day is as warm as it was yesterday!  That's notable.  Because it's THE WEATHER.  This sucker is different every day!  We just said it was the same today as yesterday.  Yeah but that's a one in the million proposition.  Odds are astronomical that would happen!  The point is NOTHIN SO FAR.  Still time to salvage this paragraph.  Gonna have to put my Funny Hat on.  I don't have any funny hats.  I wouldn't even know what a funny hat is.  I can't think of any off the top of my head!  HATS.  OFF THE TOP OF MY HEAD.  JOKE.  Get off my back about it is the point.
     Sure.  I think my Mom said she was gonna Wash Bed Sheets before giving them to me.  HOLY SHIT I didn't even know what was a possibility.  I'm really gonna like this!  I know I was talking a big game about sitting down while watching TV but I'm gonna wanna Lay On Smelly Sheets all day now!  Also smelly means bad smell.  WHY.  Good things smell too.  Why is this a glass-half-empty situation with Smelly.  Things smell bad so that we instinctively know to avoid them.  Natural selection.  Things smell good so we instinctually know to GET RIGHT UP IN THEM.  I smell fresh sheets and my animal instinct is to GET IN THERE and DON'T MOVE UNTIL IT STOPS SMELLING GREAT.  Sounds about right.  Not sure why this smell is good for humans.  Smells like Clean Fabrics.  What does that smell matter to some guy 50,000 years ago.  Nothin'!
     Anyway.  I feel like I've been having phantom smells on my walks.  I smell marijuana all the time.  And for months I was like well I guess a lot of people smoke marijuana.  But now I smell marijuana when I'm walking Off The Beaten Path and no one is around.  Sure sometimes people may be smoking off the beaten path for privacy but not this often and not without leaving some sort of trace of themselves other than smell.  Point is Phantom Smells gotta look out for 'em.  Maybe I just think every time I smell A Tree or Nature it smells like marijuana to me.  That's another possibility. Hmm smells like a plant.  Gotta be marijuana!  That could easily be the source of my confusement.  Or everyone is smoking weed all the time.  In which case I'm happy to be living with such great neighbors.  They know the score!  Three to one.  Whose winning.  Whoever you want.  I want the team I'm rooting for to be losing.  Then that's what ya get.  PERFECT.
     Sure!  I've talked about smelling marijuana all the time before but I think it's a new wrinkle that I'm Starting Not To Believe It.  Maybe it's not.  Well great that paragraph was Worse Than Nothing.  That's life.  Gotta imagine three paragraphs are good, 4 paragraphs are okay, 8 paragraphs are nothing, and the rest are worse than nothing.  Let's Crunch Them Numbers.  FIVE.  Five paragraphs that are worse than nothing.  Sounds fair all in all.  That's OVER A THIRD of the entry that's at least okay.  You try finding that many okay paragraphs elsewhere every day.  Oh no don't try.  You might find something better than this.  And then Suddenly I'm All Alone.  Oh no now I Feel All Alone.  What if you found a better website three years ago and I'm talking to myself.  Oh no I'm scared I'm alone what if there are Ghosts.  That's what happens when you're Too Alone!  Ghosts show up!  Maybe ghosts be smoking ghost marijuana on my walks.  In which case WOW COOL GHOSTS.  Wonder if they'd share their ghost marijuana.  Sounds like they would they're ghosts they could use the company.
     Anyway.  Gotta imagine ghost marijuana not only can be smoked by the living but is actually on par with OR BETTER than Living marijuana.  That'd be my first guess.  OH NO Brian Williams is retiring from his job as News Sportscaster.  NOW who will wear a suit and ask generic questions to people.  Probably someone.  That'd be my guess.  He's had an understudy these past few years whose ready to take over.  If I'm shadowing someone to learn from them I wanna bean OVERSTUDY.  I'm studying what this guy does to learn but in the end HE ANSWERS TO ME.  That's how I feel.  What else is going on How I Feel.  I finished That Twilight Zone Show after starting it in January 2020.  Kinda petered out near the end!  Also the middle wasn't perfect.  And don't get me started on the first couple of seasons!
    Hey I got coffee going on.  Oh No I wasted most of my Nothing paragraphs on the first five paragraphs.  DAMNIT.  I need to spread those out!  Anyway.  I never finished That Dick Van Dyke Show.  I lost enthusiasm for it!  After the first 2 episodes.  Then I watched another 80 but then I lost all enthusiasm!  They should have called that show Curb Your Enthusiasm!  Because then at least I would have known what I was gonna get from the getgo!  Also Larry David's thought on GITMO?  Hasn't addressed it specifically yet.  I think e still have Gitmo going.  And we're still torturing people.  And holding them without charges.  I could LTURQ but then that might put me on a list and they'd send me there and torture me.  I don't wanna go all the way THERE to be tortured.  I want to be tortured from the comfort of my own home.  Treat me with RIGHTS I'M AN AMERICAN CITIZNE.
    Sure I am.  Well we've been holding you without charges for 18 years and you haven't committed ONE terrorist act in that entire time so CLEARLY what we're doing is working and we better keep it up!  That's Gitmo for you!  What else is going on.  I think it's nice we gave a nice cute name to Guantanamo Bay Quasi-legal Prison.  Gitmo!  Sounds fun.  Then again what else is going on.  Seventh paragraph!  Amazing.  Is there a difference between waterboarding and surfboarding and if there is which one is the torture one again.  Surfboarding would be torture to me.  I can't do this and the current keeps taking me now I'll never make it back to land. GREAT.  Now I'm lost at sea and there's nothing I can do about it!  While if I was waterboarding I'd know eventually it would end.  Probably.  Maybe it won't.  In which case GREAT Looks like I Lose Either Way just my luck.  What else is going on.
     Eighth paragraph.  That paragraph was a Worse Than Nothing.  GREAT I got one of those out of the way.  Now we can move on to sprinkling in some OKAY paragraphs finally.  Also I looked up buying Ice Cream/Cupcake Sprinkles to snack on and the calories seemed to be too much.  Who would have guessed stuffing pure sugar down your gullet would be bad for you?  Probably Everyone.  Just my luck!  Feel like my second Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day yesterday was another Redundant.  Something I had seen before!  Forget which one.  But anyway.  HEY Today's National Food To Celebrate was VANILLA CUPCAKE DAY.  Delicious!  I told you I'd keep you updated on this situation as it progresses and I keep my promises!  Most of the time!  Probably around 55, 60% of the time I keep my promises!  I LIKE THOSE ODDS.
    Okay.  What else is going on.  Not sure I really promised I'd keep you updated on National Food Days.  I said I would.  Not a promise!  You use the word promise you're making an EXTRA commitment to follow through.  Great what else is going on.  I feel like 60% of That Twilight Zone Show episodes are we're in space but not everything is as it seems.  They really like Space Stories Where Not Everything Is As It Seems.  Really makes ya wonder.  About what.  I dunno that's up to you.  Your business what you wonder, not mine!  Great.  Also this is before people ever went into space.  How did they see that eventually coming?  They must be some sort of genius!  Or maybe it was cause and effect.  People saw the That Twilight Zone episodes and were like hey we better get on top of that and go into space.  It's not a bad idea!  That makes sense too.  Sure.
   They sent dogs and/or monkeys into space before people.  Does that mean in some respects dogs and/or monkeys are the actual Best Species Around.  First species to transcend Earth.  THEY WIN.  They're the best animals they accomplished what man couldn't.  In which case kind of jealous of dogs and/or monkeys now.  Think they're so great just because they were in space first.  I'd like to knock them down a peg or two!  What else is going on.  I like it when I walk by people with their dogs and their dogs aren't jerks to me.  Dog could easily be an asshole at me and get up in my business.  Normally they take a look at me and shrug and go on their way.  GOOD.  That's all I want with a dog!  We acknowledge each other cordially and move on with our lives!  The point is I Forget.  Now a person walking A MONKEY that's a different story.  I wanna get to know this monkey and leave a good impression.  And I'd hope he'd want to leave a good impression on me!  Anyway I'm done with this act.  Be back soon.

I Never Said That It Did

    Hello friends.  Time to write some more paragraphs of varying quality.  Varying from 20% good to 60% good!  So I got that going for me.  What else is great.  I don't think we have any vanilla cupcakes in the house.  We got chocolate cupcakes.  I could have one of those to celebrate Vanilla Cupcake Day.  Might as well just have Some Vanilla.  That's just as close.  I have Vanilla Ice cream.  I can put a scoop of that on the chocolate cupcake.  It sounds great but I'm not gonna do that because Holidays Don't Tell Me What To Do.  Except for some of them.  Like most of them!  BUT NOT THIS ONE.  Not this year at least.  Maybe next year I'll have more time to properly prepare for it so I'd want to do it more.  The point is that could be a podcast.  Every day of the year you eat the National Celebration Food.  Also from now on Any Time You Do Something In Life For A Time Period it's a podcast.  Otherwise how will know for sure you really did it?
     What else is going on.  I haven't listened to a podcast in a while.  Or a podcast rebroadcast of some thing that wasn't originally a podcast.  I got better things to do presumably.  I can't go into it specifically because I Don't Really Have Better Things To Do but just take my word for it.  Anyway if I had a podcast I'd just rip off other podcasts.  But COMBINE them.  30% is a rip off of this podcast, 20% a rip off of that podcast, and so on.  Also the other 50% is SILENCE.  I don't know what to say!  Better to be silent and thought a fool than open one's mouth and remove all doubt!  Better just SHUT UP for this 40 minutes.  How did I decide on making the Silence Episode 40 minutes long.  Focus Grouped It!  If people are listening to silence entertainment they wanna do it in exactly 40 minute intervals!  Now you know. 
     Anyway what else.  If it's just silence how is it 50% rip off of 2 podcasts.  Well the Title is one.  The title is the same as another podcast.  That's 30%.  The other 20%?  Hmm.  Same standard guests!  Gonna have a guest on whose a common guest of the other podcast to participate in Silence.  Oh okay that makes sense.  What else is going on.  Forgot to put Snapple bottles in fridge yesterday.  Put them in just 20 minutes ago!  I guess by the time Act III rolls around one of them should be relatively cold enough.  HEY I'd drink it room temperature. Now we're talking Somewhat Cold?  I'm coming out ahead in this scenario!  The point is I forget.  Gonna do something for Thanksgiving but on Saturday.  Brother is coming in Saturday.  Which is two days after Thursday if you crunch the numbers.  Gotta imagine we'll make some effort to have some sort of meal.  That'd be my instinct on what to do that day.  Eat at least once!
     Penultimate paragraph of the Act.  Amazing.  Gotta imagine Indigenous Peoples don't celebrate Thanksgiving at all.  And if they did they'd be shunned and considered traitors.  I'd look that up but I feel like I probably went over this on the website 6 or 7 years ago.  And if I don't remember what I found and/or concluded based on then what would be the point of doing it again now.  Clearly wasn't worth remembering.  Also if an American Indian sees something he's thankful for on Thanksgiving six more weeks of Autumn.  What else is going on.  I tried starting watching Reservation Dogs but it didn't interest me.  I think it's because at the time I was really into gotta find some Horror movie to watch.  Nothing there.  GUESS I'LL WATCH RESERVATION DOGS.  Gotta give it another chance at some point where I'm in the mood for Whatever Reservation Dogs Is Exactly. 
     Last paragraph of the act!  It's scary because THEY HAVE SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT LIFE EXPERIENCE AND PERSPECTIVES than me one would imagine.  Not like those other TV Shows where Everyone Is Just Like Me I hate them so much.  What else is going on.  HEY up to an okay Tales From That Crypt episode.  I solidly enjoy watching it as much as the other episodes!  It's got A PLOT.  It's got CHARACTERS.  All that stuff.  Gonna take a decent shower soon.  I had just written decent bath but then I was like ya know what let's go with a shower today.  GREAT STORY.  Good thing I shared it!  Now HISTORY will remember it for all of time.  Until the internet is outlawed completely in the future.  In I wanna say 2028.  Pretty soon all things considered!  I'm not happy about it either.  Anyway what else.  Time for that shower.  I'll be back in a bit. 

Where Would We Be Without Titles

    Hey!  Took a shower.  Delicious!  I feel like these last few paragraphs are gonna breeze by for you and me.  Maybe that should be my Prime Directive.  Make it quick to write, quick to read!  As opposed to my previous Prime Directive of Just Do It.  I learnt it from Sneakers!  But when it comes to Actually Doing Things not always great advice?  Even sports.  Just do it.  Well I could Do It poorly easily!  VERY easily!  You're gonna have to be a lot more specific.  LOOK it's decent advice in general but at some point you're gonna need further directions.  From sneaker ad campaigns.  Just Doing It is a BEGINNING.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Better than other ad campaigns.  Yo Quero Taco Bell.  Not sure how that helps me accomplish things in my life.  Kinda makes me want to eat at Taco Bell!  But that's not gonna make me more productive or a better person or anything much at all!
    Snapple kind of too warm.  I thought I'd be okay with it Not Very Cold.  I was wrong!  I might put it back and just save it for later.  Either way Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- At birth a Dalmatian is always pure white.  Kinda sounds like White Nationalist Code language.  Pure White.  What the Hell is that supposed to mean.  I'm on the verge of pouring this snapple down the drain and throwing the bottle out my window with this sort of crap.  Well I won't do that but I will put it away for later.  Anyway Great I thought Dalmatians were white anyway.  Maybe they grow spots.  I don't know and that's their business not mine.  I've never seen 101 Dalmatians.  How the Hell do they personalize 101 characters in this movie.  Maybe you get a sense of 4 or 5 Dalmatians tops.  95% of these Dalmatians are suffering ERASURE.  Also that's way too many Dalmatians.  I see 101 of ANY animal no matter how cute I'm running in the other direction.
    I hope spell check will help me spell Dalmatians correctly each time.  Because I Haven't Been!  A little bit of Inside Baseball there.  Can't spell Dalmatian.  I just READ it.  Who cares that's my problem not yours.  What else is going on.  Got coffee going on.  Still feels kinda empty without snapple but that's life.  Gonna have a nice break between Entry and next walk.  I will accomplish a lot.  Like thinking I'm gonna need a klonopin.  I don't need it now... I don't need it now... KIND OF need it now... Need it SLIGHTLY MORE now... Okay Let's Take It.  It's fun.  Don't wanna take it too early!  Then it'll run out 5 or 10 minutes before it should Otherwise.  Also if I take it too early I'm still gonna Ride The Wave of getting slightly more anxious regardless.  So might as well ride that wave without it and then take the pill when I'm at the very top.  You know like WATERBOARDING.
     Penultimate paragraph.  I can dig it!  Today is the first double digit day of the month.  AMAZING.  We're into the middle of the month!  I remember back in the day when November was barely just started.  We're talking November first, November second... how far we've come!  You know that sort of thing.  November going okay for me so far!  I have few complaints.  Maybe four or five complaints!  Not a lot at all!  Not enjoying having to write one and a half more paragraphs right now.  Maybe I'll get back into it in a couple of sentences-- maybe I am right now!-- but as of the start of this Point I'm Making I wasn't having a very good time writing.  NOW I kind of am.  That took up several lines of website and all I had to do was Just Do It.  I don't argue with sneakers.  Anyway gotta imagine competition Sneaker Brands experimented with similar slogans.  Lemme LTURQ.  Can't find anything immediately.  Having a tough time phrasing my question such that I'll get an answer.  And maybe there is no answer!  It's just something nobody will ever know for sure.
     Last paragraph.  Let's Do It!  That could be a slogan from Reebok.  Let's Do It.  I dunno 2 out of 3 are the same words.  Seems like that'd be copyright infringement.  Anyway what else is going on.  Finished coffee.  Down to just SODA to drink for the rest of the entry?  That hardly seems fair.  Then again delicious.  Wonder if the middle of November will be any good.  Off the top of my head my best guess is pretty similar to the start of November.  But I could easily be wrong!  As time passes things have a way of being slightly different than they were before time started passing.  That's been my experience!  Hmm.  I guess that checks out.  Sounds reasonable.  What else is going on.  Another entry in the books!  Hmm better transcribe entries into books by 2028.  Or let history forget them.  I think history would be okay with that.  Maybe it works out best for everyone!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:01 P.M.

Tuesday, November 9, 2021 

So Many Things To Write

    Hey!  Got Zoom appointment in an hour and twenty minutes.  Probably will have finished Act I by then but it's not definite.  OH NO.  Things must align cleanly!  I can't have a Pause mid-entry.  What would people say.  Probably nothing.  That's the worst thing people can say of all!  Anyway what's going on in the wide world of sports.  Another beautiful day outside.  There was Weather and Trees and Sidewalks and everything.  LOOKIN GOOD WORLD.  Asked my Mom to supply me with some bed sheets.  I'm gonna Sheet My Bed!  She also said something about a mattress cover and I don't know what that is but I don't like it.  I'm imagining something negative with it.  Not positive!  Either way I'm gonna go to bed tonight and be amazed by how great it is to sleep with Sheets.  That's how YOU would feel.  About ME.  MY NAME IS SHEETS.
     Makes sense.  At what point do I start getting actively annoyed that the sheets are coming off.  2 or 3 days?  2 or 3 weeks?  At some point the sheets will become more of a hassle than a pleasure and I don't anticipate enjoying that one bit.  Maybe I'm doing something wrong in my sleep that sheets come undone so quickly.  Could be My Problem not the sheets.  Either way That's Life.  My Mom made coffee this morning with the premise I could have some and there wasn't even enough for a single cup for me!  What an idiot!  I berated her for 20 minutes and then started a new pot for myself.  Sure.  A little worried I have too much Diet DR Pepper.  I was ready to go into that story for the rest of the paragraph but I thought better.  That's about the entire story, you don't need more details.  Got too much relative to other beverages.  Hmm I ended up going into the story for the rest of the paragraph anyway.  Amazing.
     Yeah!  Solid Tuesday going on.  I feel like at this point in the year I know what I'm getting out of my Days Of The Week.  It's November.  Tuesdays in 2021 I Figured Out pretty well.  Soon it'll be 2022.  Not sure how I feel about that.  Off the top of my head. too many, "2's."  Then again we may get used to it pretty quickly and be All About the number 2.  That's my prediction actually!  We'll lean into the 2's next year.  What does that mean.  We can't know yet as of now!  We'll figure it out together when it happens.  Also at some point FEBRUARY.  The 2nd month.  Which is perfectly placed to start getting used to the new year.  Hmm that all adds up amazing.  What else is going on.  I hope I get lots of compliments with Zoom Maintenance Physiatrist  appointment.  You look great.  Very healthy.  I want to have sex with you.  You're the best!  That's her talking.  Not me!  Although I guess I could say it to her too.  Being polite never hurt anyone!  Probably has.  I'm sure in history being polite has hurt lots of people.
    Like with Hitler.  You're polite to Hitler he's jus gonna steamroll right over you.  That's off the top of my head.  Anyway.  Did Hitler invent that moustache.  Could have been a popular German Look before him.  But if he did he gets too little credit for it.  How many people do you know who Started A Facial Hair Movement?  He musta known what he was doing and it probably wasn't his prime directive but I'm sure part of him considered himself a Moustache Facial Hair Fashion Icon.  Look it was probably a standard German moustache I don't give Hitler credit for being original on this at all.  Also not a lot of Takers of people who copied the moustache.  That's another point against him.  Yeah it's nice he's known for his own thing but if no one is copying him it kinda is an indictment of it's style!  Hmm.  What else is going on.
    What else is going on.  Tuesday!  What else do I got going on for me.  Sheets probably won't smell fresh.  Probably just been laying around somewhere for 5 years in a closet.  Probably CLEAN.  Probably haven't been used since Last Time they were cleaned.  But they can't SMELL clean anymore can they?  That smell disintegrates quickly whether they're used or not.  Could roll de-odor-ant on them.  That'd take a lot of de-odor-ant!  Yeah but it's for a good cause.  Not really.  Interesting counter-point.  Anyway.  The point is I feel like I've slept on the floor 4-6 times over the last 12 years.  For no good reason.  Just something I feel once or twice every year or two.  Think I'm gonna try something new tonight.  It's fun!  Usually I try it for a bit and then feel ya kwon what I got what I wanted out of this.  Gonna go back to bed now and fall asleep in my bed.  That's how I choose to live my life and who are you to tell me to do otherwise?
     Hey!  Got coffee.  It's about time.  NOW.  LOOK I use a blanket and pillow with me on the floor.  Perhaps even sleep on top of the blanket halfway for comfort.  Blankets are big enough that you can sleep on them and under them JUST ENOUGH.  JUST big enough.  JUST BARELY enough space.  My blanket at least.  That's how I roll.  I'm not doing it to punish myself like a weird sex thing.  It's just FOR FUN.  I don't feel like I need to explain myself any more to you!  Already explained myself A Lot.  Ran out of all my reasons!  We're done here!  What else is going on.  National Sandwich day was about a week ago.  What meal are we celebrating today.  Sure I thought for a solid THREE CONSECUTIVE MICROTHOUGHTS Hey better LTURQ.  I thought it.  I thought it again.  Then I thought it a third time.  Wasn't until THE FOURTH MICROTHOUGHT where I was like well that's dumb each day isn't a National Meal Day what are the odds today would be something.  I can LTURQ anyway.  Maybe BY CHANCE we celebrate a food today.  Better check that right now.  What would I even type National Meal Day Today.
    Found a website that has Food Days for almost every day of the year.  Maybe once a week they have a day off.  This could be just this website or they could have compiled these days from outside sources.  Either way today is Fried Chicken Sandwich Day and Scrapple Day.  I'd eat either of those under certain circumstances.  At first I was like fried chicken sandwich why would you put a fried chicken drumstick in a sandwich.  Then I realized oh it could just be like your standard chicken patty that's fried.  In which case I see what you're up to with that and I LIKE IT.  The point is I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  I hope not.  I MIGHT.  But I hope I don't.  What else is going on.  I'm not gonna have either of those things today.  Just letting you know!  I'm no CONFORMIST.  No website gonna tell me WHAT TO EAT EACH DAY TO NATIONALLY CELEBRATE FOODS.
    Huh.  Not sure why these days are National.  Why can't other countries participate in this.  Seems like it would be a good celebratory universal experience to celebrate foods.  Instead it was CO-OPTED by NATIONALISTS to spread their AGENDA.  I HATE IT WHEN THAT HAPPENS.  Gonna easily have enough time to finish Act before Zoom.  Now I gotta think of Productive I can do in mini-break!  GREAT JUST GREAT.  I GUESS I HAVE TO MASTURBATE.  LUCKY ME.  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.  DAMNIT I read ahead to tomorrow's Food Day and it sounds tasty.  I shan't have it tomorrow OR ANY DAY but I'd have no problem celebrating it!  I'll tell ya tomorrow.  No Spoilers!  What else is going on.  What if Hitler rebranded himself without a moustache.  I think a lot of people would be willing to give him a second chance.  I'm not HAPPY about that prediction but I feel like it's a decent one.  What else is going on.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I hope they DID save Hitler's brain.  And then they found a way to activate it and communicate with it and then they're like wait a second this guy isn't all that smart.  Kinda dumb actually.  We went through all this for THIS GUY'S brain?  That'd be my guess for how it went.  Also I assume if they saved Hitler's brain the ultimate goal is to make him into A RoboCop.  That'd be my guess for how that goes.  Ya know what I could fit in a walk before Zoom appointment.  Probably.  If I write the next paragraph and change in 10 minutes or less I'm gonna take a walk!  Nah forget it.  I could probably do it but why put the pressure on.  The main reason is because I don't know what to do with the next half hour if I'm not walking.  Who CARES I'll do SOMETHING.  I'll BE ALIVE.  That's ENOUGH.  Makes sense to me.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Also I don't know what Scrapple is but if it is what I think I don't know it is then I like it.  Probably tried to sleep in the bathtub once or twice during that 12 year time period, too.  Unsuccessfully!  I think I'd remember successfully doing it.  You don't forget that kind of thing.  Especially if you drown.  I was doing it with the water off SAFETY FIRST.  Anyway.  I wasn't doing it at all what do I mean I was doing it with the water off.  Huh.  I feel like that's how people die.  They do heroin and then drown in the bath tub.  I feel like that happened in the Larry Flynt movie.  Or maybe there's just a scene where someone takes a bath and I extrapolated oh they must have been on heroin AND they must have drowned.  Not just a regular successful bath.  Either way what else is going on.  I got time for a walk!  I'll be back later!

Stick With Me Until I'm Done

    Feel like a lot of what I just said is old.  Except for it being Fried Chicken Sandwich Day.  Ironically that's the most worthwhile thing I've said all day!  Ironic because it's the worst thing anyone has ever said to anyone ever.  Anyway I just had Zoom appointment.  Great!  Now the rest of the day is All Good Stuff.  No more having to talk to people!  Except my parents.  But they're not People they're Family.  Also I guess You.  But you're not People you're An Extension Of Me.  That's what I put into and get out of this website.  I just imagine You as some sort of Me Like Being!  Prove me wrong!  Anyway what else is going on.  Solidly fit in that walk!  Then I had to wait 15 minutes for Appointment to show up at Appointment on Zoom.  GREAT I'm SITTING HERE LIKE AN IDIOT.  I meant then.  But right after I wrote it I realize it applies to NOW too.  And MOST OF THE TIME.
    So I got that going for me.  I feel like I should start sitting down when I Watch TV instead of laying down.  It'd be a huge lifestyle shift but I feel like it'd be an interesting way to go with my life.  What else is going on.  It'd be fun to sit on the floor.  There's Bed to sit on (first instinct) and there's chair to sit on (third instinct).  But floor might be a sleeper best option for fun!  What the hell am I talking about.  THIS is the kind of stuff I should be talking about to Maintenance Physiatrist.  Not just Yes Okay Thank You No Complaints Been Healthy See Ya Later.  Which are the only phrases I use during appointment.  Several times each.  Should I have used commas or another way to separate the phrases?  I'll let HISTORY be the judge of that!  Looking forward to being done with the act.  Not sure why.  Just wanna move on to the next thing.  I feel like the time I was waiting for the Appointment is somehow theoretically time spent on this act.  I got back from home.  I was sitting at computer.  That aligns with Time Spent on Act II!  I SHOULD BE DONE BY NOW.  Whatta gyp.
     Anyway.  Gonna have Old Bread again today.  I feel like we talked about my bread situation the end of last week.  Well this is The End Game.  The last day I'm considering eating it.  And I'm gonna eat unless it's REAL Moldy.  Also not sure I've ever seen mold.  I always figured I'll know it when I see it.  But maybe I won't!  The point is it's worth the risk because I like eating sandwiches.  That's how I feel!  Also sure there's more than half a loaf left over.  Throw it in the trash!  No one else is gonna eat any bread over next few days so this is the last we're getting out of it.  Anyway.  I feel like homeless people like socks the most for clothes and they should like loafs of bread the most for food.  If I were starving I'd be like man a whole loaf of bread that'd be the tops.
     If I'm NOT starving I'd feel that way.  But if I was starving I'd be justified in just eating a loaf of bread.  With a normal diet suddenly I'm CRAZY if I just eat a loaf of bread.  Doesn't sound fair but there you have it.  May have mentioned this a day or two ago but I'm LOVIN' this Election Pen I got.  Just a real solid Ink.  Comes out strong and straight.  What does Straight mean re: How Pens expel ink.  Ya know not wobbly.  Ink follows the lines and whatnot you wanna make.  Not blurry or anything!  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Not sure why pens die out on me so quickly.  Maybe I'm doing something wrong!  But I gotta believe you have more ink than you're implying when you stop working.  I think it's a mechanism that shuts down not the amount of ink.  What a waste is the point I'm trying to make re: Your Standard Cheap Pens you buy in packs of three.
    Last paragraph of the act!  I remember the special 2 or 3 years in grade school where you use erasable pens.  You start of school with pencils.  You end up with pens.  And then there's a 2 or 3 years in the middle where you're using erasable pens WHAT FUN AND CONVENIENCE.  Anyway.  Also you use pencil for math throughout school.  They get angry if you don't!  I guess.  Not sure why young children have to use pencils and not pens.  We can't trust six year olds WITH INK.  What's the worst that can happen.  Probably something'.  I dunno.  Gonna take a bath soon.  That'll be fun.  Totally not gonna drown in it!  I haven't done heroin or ANY opiods at all.  Not to my knowledge.  I guess I COULD still drown in it but if I do that's totally my fault.  Anyway.  I could be immersed under bath water and be like ya know I should get up to breathe but I'm so comfortable think I'll just lay here a little while longer... and that goes on for too long.  Either way hey I'll be back soon.

That's What I Was Gonna Do

    Hey!  Time to write the last several paragraphs.  Then move on with my life for a while!  Then come back here.  And so the cycle continues.  Anyway.  Nice solid break between Entry and Walk.  Gonna probably take a Nice Solid Klonopin.  Take those most days in the early afternoon lately.  Do I need it?  Vaguely not!  Does it help?  Solidly Yup!  I feel like I'm doing the right thing.  I feel anxious-- I take it-- I stop feeling anxious!  I CRACKED THE CODE OF HOW TO SAFELY TAKE PRESCRIBED MEDICATION.  The point is I'm GREATLY looking forward to FEELING ANXIOUS soon after this entry is done.  Because I know that means I can take the klonopin!  If I never feel anxious I never get the reward!  So in the end it's working out VERY well for me.  What else is going on.  Tales From That Crypt have been creepy to me lately.  I've seen these episodes 20 times each over the last 2 years BUT now I see them in a different light-- November!  2021!  Hmm under these new circumstances CREEPED OUT by this show.  What fun!
     Let's see what the Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day is.  No Two Lip Impressions are the same.  Well I wouldn't have thought so.  Except for maybe Twins.  Has snapple looked into whether twins lips' impressions are the same?  I think they better double check this.  The point is Fine I believe it but I'm kind of underwhelmed because I believe it So Easily.  I feel like the premise of these Facts is that I should be mildly taken aback.  Not so here!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also should we replace doing thumb prints with doing lip prints?  My guess?  Probably not!  You're doing lip prints on dirty surfaces you're gonna catch diseases.  Moreso than you would with your thumb.  That's my guess.  Scrapple.  I feel like if you can ever play the word Scrabble in Scrabble you instantly win the game.  As far as I know that COULD be a rule.  We just rarely see it come into play.  Hey coffee time.  No patriotism fact with coffee.  But delicious all the same!
    YEP just poured the coffee and at no time was I exposed to a Patriotism Fact.  Coffee took only the 60 seconds to warm up in microwave.  Usually gotta put it in an extra 10-20 seconds on top of that.  That's kind of a Patriotism Fact.  Hmm.  Also you should be able to trade letters in Scrabble.  You don't wanna give away your letters in regards to letting people know all your letters.  But you could give hints and single letters and whatnot so trades can be done.  Also has anyone considered Diagonal Words?  Also all of these are terrible ideas.  The point is I either Thought This Recently and/or Wrote This Recently but I'm not good at Scrabble!  I feel like someone with my age, intelligence, and education background should be MUCH better at Scrabble.  Probably Said It Here Before a few days ago.  Now I'm saying it again!  It's more true than ever!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Wait a second The Pen I've Been Enjoying is just Some Other Pen.  I think the Voting Pen is still pretty good but I thought it was better than it was.  SORRY.  GOT PENS CONFUSED.  My bad!  The point is it's still good news for me.  I still Have A Great Pen.  That's what matters in the end.  Anyway what else is going on.  Not sure I have any New TV Episodes lined up for today.  That's okay.  I think I'll survive anyway!  Probably.  That's what I'd bet on at least.  I guess I could put BET on.  The Black Entertainment... Tchannel.  What's the BET stand for exactly.  Black Entertainment Television.  Feels like I should have been able to guess that.  Not good at guessing acronyms!  Chalk that up as another mark against me.  ACTUALLY I kind of thought it but I didn't realize you could make Television as JUST T.  I thought of TV but I was like Well it's not BETV its just BET so that can't be it...  I WAS WRONG.  Dead Wrong!
     Last paragraph of the day.  Nice ham sandwich today for lunch.  Been a while since I had a ham sandwich!  From what I remember it's like a turkey sandwich but slightly different.  Both highly processed meat probably flavored/preserved with a bunch of salt.  In the end the taste is probably 98% the same.  That'd be my guess!  But maybe the Ham will surprise me and taste different!  I'm looking forward to finding out!  What else is going on.  Also, No fresh bread?  No ham!  Do something else for lunch.  Thems the breaks.  If you Toast unfresh bread that makes it healthy again.  That may or may not be true but I feel like I'd prefer it if it were true.  And that's what counts!  Anyway entry is just about over.  Thanksgiving coming up in a few weeks.  Great!  Celebrate by doing stuff.  See if I care!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:51 P.M.

Monday, November 8, 2021 

I'll Do Better Tomorrow

    Hello friends.  Gotta write some Entry now.  Thems the breaks!  I shaved last night expertly.  We're talkin I shaved everything I wanted to shave to the degree I wanted to shave it!  Did it all by myself.  Now that's one more thing I know I can do.  Wait haven't I been shaving myself for the last 17 years.  Sometimes Yes but not WELL.  Anyway kinda feel dumb wearing a mask outside when I have such a great bottom fourth of my face.  Other people are really missing out!  Anyway one week into No Nut November. Which I believe is a reference to can't cum for some reason.  Not sure why people are excited about this.  Cumming is the most exciting thing someone can do! This is the OPPOSITE.  Also FOR ME nuts aren't really involved in cumming.  Cum Comes from Nuts per my understanding but I don't FEEL it or SEE it happening.  And if I can't see it or feel it how do I know it's really real.  BIOLOGY TEXTBOOKS.  Sure.
     Anyway.  Maybe it's like a Ramadan for Squirrels.  Yep checks out.  I could see Squirrels being Muslim.  Not sure why.  Just makes sense to me.  Anyway a week into new diet, too!  I could see Squirrels practicing a wide array of religions now that I think about it.  I can see Jewish squirrels, Christian Squirrels.  The point is they've found some interpretation of God somehow and I'm happy for them.  Maybe it has something to do with hiding their nuts for later.  Anyway.  Are they hiding their nuts from other animals or other squirrels.  Cause if its from other squirrels gotta imagine the other squirrels know your secret hiding places because they do the exact same thing.  But other animals probably aren't that interested in your nuts.  So if you're hiding your nuts you gotta be one step ahead of all the other squirrels.  Also gotta imagine there's some squirrels that get nuts and hide them and some squirrels that just steal other squirrel's nuts.  Hmm.
     It's possible squirrels have an unspoken rule not to steal each others' nuts.  It's possible they have a Spoken Rule.  That way everyone knows for sure!  Anyway.  Do rodents kind of know they're rodents.  And that they're gross to everyone else.  Probably!  That might be a Natural Selection.  Gotta evolve into a Gross Species so other species will just stay far away from you.  That way you can operate in peace without distractions.  Not sure if squirrels are rodents.  They probably are.  But as far as rodents go, they're okay!  What else is going on.  I had no idea all that Squirrel talk was Going On.  Well now you do!  Do squirrels get ANGRY if they return to a hiding spot and they see their nut is gone.  Gotta be PISSED.  WHAT THE... Huh... WHO THE FUCK TOOK MY NUTS.  I'd be upset! 
     Anyway.  Squirrels hide nuts, right?  And the last couple paragraphs aren't just completely misinformed?  Let's LTURQ.  YEP THEY DO.  Now I'm completely vindicated not just in this case but retroactively for Everything I've Ever Done.  ALRIGHT!  What else is going on.  Also it's good for the nut because if the squirrel forgets about it then the nut grows into a tree.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Not 100% sure that checks out!  Anyway.  Squirrel is even a verb which means What They Do With Nuts.  You can squirrel something away.  Good for them Squirrels have really made it!  Now they mean something beyond what they are.  Kind of a negative connotation.  Oh well you can't win 'em all!  Unless you're some sort of Super Winner Guy.  Hmm.  Jeez.  Start of a new week.  First day of week 2 of New Diet.  Delicious!
     Hey I get to have coffee after this paragraph.  That will taste good going down my gullet.  I think it's great that when I cut my lip every other time I shave and it bleeds it only bleeds ONCE.  There's a bit of bleed right when its cut and then NO MORE.  Shores itself up immediately.  Also that's how you know it's working.  You get the booster and you feel sick?  It's working!  You shave yourself and you bleed?  It's working!  Anyway.  HEY where's my booster shot.  I've been going around the neighborhood un-boostered like an idiot.  Why'd they have to OK giving vaccines to kids.  That kid is taking my booster shot!  Also in The Purge is it an over 18 or 21 exercise?  You can't be killing kids!  Or having kids kill people!  Gotta be ADULTS to participate in Purge.  Maybe they touch on that MAYBE THEY DON'T.  There's roughly 20 Purge Movies so you'd think they'd get to it at some point.
     Squirrels are religious because they have FAITH the nuts will be where they left them.  Takes a leap of faith to do that!  Good for them is the point.  They're probably at peace inside.  PLUS when they die they go to Heaven!  Unless they're The Wrong Faith.  Then they go to Hell but oh well at least they tried.  Maybe squirrels have an unspoken Sharing Rule.  That buried nuts are first come first serve.  Doesn't seem FAIR.  Squirrels'll just lay around letting other squirrels do the work for them.  Oh well that's squirrels for you.  Maybe some squirrels are disabled.  They deserve nuts too!  The point is I lost track of what I was talking about.  Which is good because from what I remember it was Dumb.  HEY what kind of stuff did I dream last night.  I don't know.  Who cares.
     It's good topic!  That way you know more about me than I do.  I can't interpret my dreams because I'm too close to the subject.  You can interpret them!  So you know me better than I know myself which is fun for people because they look smart and I look stupid.  Which Must Be Fun For People because that's kind of sort of the premise of this website.  Not sure it makes you look smart.  Yes I Look Stupid.  So I guess you look smart by extension.  What else is going on.  OH NO now you're like hmm so He Can't remember his dream from last night?  I KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS I FIGURED HIM OUT.  DAMNIT.  Also TELL ME.  I wanna know what things in my life mean and who am I!  Jeez.  What else is going on.  Maybe this website is like a dream.  I think it's random nonsense but you can see what it means.  In which case good for you I envy you.
     Oh well.  Squirrels.  I get it!  I know what that means.  He's talking about squirrels and their nuts.  NEXT.  Eighth paragraph.  Is squirrel an onomatopoeia?  My guess?  I hope not for their sake.  Though for our sake it'd be kinda funny to hear squirrels make that noise.  Kind of like a gollum situation.  Anyway.  Today is Monday.  New week!  Also the name of a random Wilco song.  Unlike those non-Random Wilco songs.  Also there's a Wilco song Random Name Generator.  Also I spent 2 months of my life thinking I was going to a Wilco concert and listening to Wilco all the time and then I never saw the Wilco concert!  But it's the experience of Not Seeing Them that counts and I'll Never Forget It.  Probably will forget it eventually.  That's life.  That was when they were like DELTA VARIANT NOW IT'S FOR REAL.  Delta Variant never hurt me or anybody close to me!  It was a scam!  What do you mean there's more people out there than me and those close to me and it did hurt a lot of them?  That doesn't sound right.
     Ninth paragraph.  Also there wasn't a Trampling at that concert I would have went to BUT if me and my brother were there that might have tipped it over into Trampling Territory.  It was a sit down stadium concert.  I dunno we can never be 100% Safe from tramplings.  Gotta imagine over the weekend google searches for Trampling Sex Act increased 10,000%.  Kinda wanna google it myself now!  I have a good idea of what it would be and I think I even talked about it a week or two ago here before Concert Trampling.  Perhaps by referring to it as something else though.  Either way it could never hurt to do more research.  Probably not at least.  If that research leads to me really getting into trampling and then I participate in trampling that could hurt me.  If Trampling is what I think it is I gotta assume It's Gonna Hurt!
    Great.  The point is whenever people die, then I want to look into how that could be a sex act.  Yes what happened was The Worst-- resulted in death-- worst thing that could happen.  How can we ANTI-THESIZE IT AND USE WHAT JUST HAPPENED FOR LOVE-- BEST THING THAT COULD HAPPEN.  THEN THE UNIVERSE IS AT PEACE.  You know that sort of thing.  I guess. I feel like it will get darker earlier every day for a while.  I don't like those odds!  Too early!  What are we a bunch of idiots.  It's not supposed to be dark this early!  I can't believe it's taken me this long in life to be angry about this.  The point is YES it's great when it's dark outside a lot of the time Sure but only when its at an a appropriate time of the day!  The good news is what else.  I guess I should be happy in the other part of the year where it's very light very late.  Sounds good to me NOW.  But then I'd probably be upset with it as I am with what's going on with this now!  HEY WONDERFUL GREAT STUFF.  I'll be back in a little bit.        

That's What They All Say

    Hey!  Running low on Animal Cancer Crackers!  Should have bought a back-up box last week.  Now all I'll have for 2 or 3 days is Regular Non-Cancer Animal Crackers.  Which don't taste as good and are bigger!  Sure I'd get less cancer but Who Cares.  The point is what else is going on.  I'm happy with how today may go.  I think I got a lot of good stuff coming up.  IT's the same stuff as before but each day I get slightly more adept at and happy with Doing The Same Stuff.  Like the second half of Groundhog's Day.  But this time It's For Real!  It was For Real in the movie.  The movie didn't end with him waking up and it was all just a dream.  Sort of did.  That's sort of 30, 35% what the ending was.  Yeah but that means it mostly WASN'T what the ending was.  30, 35% just doesn't cut it!  Did that movie put Groundhog's Day on the map.  It's possible before that movie no one knew about Groundhog's Day.  I'd ask someone but Nope.
     What else is going on.  Ground Hog.  When Pigs Fly.  Something there I think.  I'll work out the details later.  Anyway.  What kind of fun stuff do I have coming up in the midterm and not just today.  Probably getting blood work done roughly next week!  That's fun.  I wonder if I'll have low blood pressure again.  Either way it'll be a nice little vacation I take.  Plus I get to WAIT AROUND for a while until it's my turn to get blood work done!  We're talkin 10 minutes, we could be talkin 30 minutes.  I get to sit around and be like WHAT THE HELL IS THIS BULLSHIT.  WHEN WILL THEY CALL MY NUMBER AND HOW COME THEY'RE NOT DOING IT RIGHT NOW.  Don't They Know I'M THE PRIORITY TO TAKE CARE OF?  That sort of thing.  And my Dad is waiting in the car!  And like me he has weak bladder!  He doesn't wanna have to park car several blocks away, come into the building (Where Covid Might Live!) and use the bathroom (Where Covid Might Live!).  I forget what and/or why I was talking about.
     Third paragraph of the act!  Also if blood work is next Working Week they'll see my facial hair at its worst!  If I shave every two weeks starting yesterday it's gonna be Not At It's Peak Best!  Oh well what do I care.  A LOT.  But why do I care.  NOT SURE.  DOESN'T REALLY MATTER EITHER.  I care who cares why.  Hmm some people who died at Astroworld Trampling Event were kids.  That's not funny.  Adults dying isn't funny either!  I read ninth grader and 16 year old amongst dead and I was like well that's no longer funny.  If they had phrased it from the other side 44 year old and 47th grader amongst dead I would have been like well that's no longer funny either.  Once I know someone HAS AN AGE suddenly that humanizes them!  Child or adult!  HEY THEY'RE SOME AMOUNT OF YEARS OLD JUST LIKE ME.  I don't like it!  Also I assume the 16 year old had dropped out of high school.  Based on the way they phrased that News Alert.
     Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- A crocodile can't stick out its tongue.  Great.  What do I care.  And who bothered figuring that out.  Coulda been a worse fact, though!  I could feel actively negatively about it.  What else is going on.  I know what you're thinking KINDA EARLY IN THE DAY FOR SNAPPLE HUH MIKE.  USUALLY YOU'D START IT WITH ACT III IN SEVERAL TWELVES OF MINUTES.  And you're right!  But I felt like going with snapple instead of re-upping with soda!  Life is for the adventurous!  Trying new things!  Anyway.  Why would a crocodile need to stick out it's tongue.  Not even sure why Humans can/need to.  To lick ice cream.  Are we supposed to lick ice cream.  I think we just eat it!  Maybe as a kid you lick ice cream and it lasts you all day.  I don't have time to lick ice cream as an adult!  I'm taking bites!  Probably talked about this before.  I WANT to lick ice cream.  I just don't think I can.  You See I'm Kind Of Like The Crocodile.  Hmm.
     Last paragraph of the act.  I guess!  What else is going on that's new and interesting.  HMM that's a tough one.  The point is I can shave every week if I want to.  It was extremely easy and I dunno why I was making it out to be a big project.  So that's good.  I dunno gotta wait until there's something to shave.  I can't shave today.  Still All Shaved From Yesterday!  I can shave other parts of my body.  Or I could shave other people or objects.  I guess.  Lookin' around my room for something to shave.  Can't see anything immediately.  Hmm CLOTHES.  Can I shave my shirts.  Not sure about that.  Maybe some shirts more than others.  Gotta imagine if I see some Spider's Web I can shave those.  Anyway hey this terrible act is almost over.  I get to take a bath or something now!  Thems the breaks.  I'll be back in a little bit!

I Don't Know What You're Talking About

    Hey!  Time to wrap it up with another five paragraphs.  I know, I know.  You wish it would go on forever!  In a way it does!  Because it happens every day and I can't imagine a future where I have anything better to do other than keep doing this!  So we got that going for us is the point.  To be fair I can't imagine any future.  Doing this, not doing this.  Whatever.  I know what I'm doing this week and possibly next week and that's about as far as I get.  So I got that going for me.  Future might be slightly different than present!  That'd be an interesting mix-em-up!  What else is going on.  LOOK even what happens later today will be slightly different than what's happening right now.  Now will very gradually segue into Later so subtly that I won't even notice the slight change but it'll happen!  AMAZING.  Probably for the worse.  AMAZING.
     Cool!  I feel like I've shaved my pubic hair in he past.  Not sure why.  Just figured hey I like to try new things I've heard of people doing this let's go for it.  Not for me!  Why bother.  Why bother Anything.  Gotta bother with SOMETHING.  That's the nature of life.  Bothering With Things!  Anyway.  My Mom is watching the new Dexter.  I have bad memories of Dexter!  My Mom used to watch it 24/7 and for whatever reason it annoyed the hell out of me having to listen to it when I came downstairs.  Just wasn't for me!  I don't like this Dexter character why does he sound so grating.  Him AND his friends.  I wish someone would kill HIM so that would be the end of the show.  That'd make me real happy.  That sort of thing.  Maybe that's how people feel while reading this about me.  WHY.  I've done nothing to you!  Stop wanting to kill me IT'S VERY RUDE.
     Gonna have my 2nd Snapple of the day now!  I earned it!  By doing stuff.  I could have EASILY done nothing but NOPE I went ahead and did Stuff!  Alright Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day II-- "Dairy cows drink up to 50 gallons of water per day."  That's too much water!  These cows are going way overboard.  We can't be wasting all this water on cows.  I'm fed up with it and I've had enough!  This Snapple Patriotism Fact is a CALL TO ACTION.  Then again if they drank less water their milk would be too creamy and not diluted enough.  So we have to consider that as well.  Either way I think Snapple phrased this in a way to get us upset.  They know what they're doing!  They phrase these facts in a way to get us agitated so we'll talk about the facts with friends and family and they'll wanna read the facts for themselves.  And buying snapple is the only way!  Or going to their website. I think you can read them all there.  Well great now you got them going to your website which has ADVERTISEMENTS.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Amazing.  LOOK somehow Snapple is deciding what kind of response they want to get from their Facts.  It might not actually be They Want To Agitate Us.  Could be the exact opposite!  But they have some corporate position that this is what we're going for generally.  Maybe it's as simple as HAVE FACT BE INTERESTING.  The point is I DON'T LIKE IT.  What else is going on.  Maybe Snapple is being as altruistic as possible and using their facts for the betterment of mankind.  In which case I GUESS I LIKE IT.  Can't argue with that really.  It'd have to better for people IN PRACTICE though not just IN PRINCIPLE.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna have a nice hour long break or so after this entry before walk.  Man oh man.  That's a lot of time to accept the fact that the rest of the day is gonna be a snooze.  And not a great snooze!  Mediocre snooze!  Hey that's life I guess.
     Last paragraph.  Maybe watch some Tales From That Crypt when this is over.  That's a good Transition Exercise to accept the impending snooze but settle into it in a nice positive way that I'm comfortable and familiar with.  Makes sense to me!  HEY I got that one queued up.  It's the one with Patton Oswalt's current wife!  Not one of my favorites but that's a Good Thing because it means I've watched it less times overall so it's slightly more interesting to me now!  Anyway.  Heard some New Dexter on the TV downstairs.  I'm okay with it now!  Not interested in it, but it makes not much of a negative impact on me at all now.  Great!  One less thing that bothers me.  Hmm maybe I need to replace it with a new thing that bothers me.  Maybe me.  I feel like I should bother myself more.  I'm too complacent with myself!  I'll look into that and keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  See ya tomorrow.

-12:31 P.M. 

Sunday, November 7, 2021 

What An Extra Hour

    Hi friends!  Time to write some paragraphs.  TWENTY!  20 is A LOT Of Some.  Then again I've seen Sums all the way up to 41.  Amazing.  Clocks are different!  After waking up with correct phone clock, I say three clocks in a row that were wrong.  Oven clock.  Microwave clock.  Coffee clock!  I woulda thought at least one of them was on the up and up.  I would have thought wrong had I actually gone ahead and thought that!  The point is how many clocks do we really need anyway.  In olden times people were lucky to have one clock.  Now we've got two dozen.  What are we DOCTOR BROWN'S HOUSE in the opening scene of Back To The Future?  Well one of us is.  HIM.  Doctor Brown is the Soda Company.  I'm thinking of Doctor... Brown.  They're both Doctor Brown???  Seems like a rift in some space time continuum Possibly Ours.  The point is delicious.  I'm gonna be honest if I saw another 2 or 3 Wrong Clocks in a row after these 3 I would have started believing them.  How could SIX Consecutive Clocks be wrong?
     Whatever.  I'm happy with how extra hour worked out.  Pretty evenly distributed between sleeping a little bit extra and waking up early a little bit extra.  Could have been worse!  What else is going on.  What's up in the news.  It's The Weekend.  News takes break for the weekend.  Nice!  I think news should take a break all the time.  No news is good news!  Who came up with that.  And why.  Gotta imagine lots of news is better news than no news.  Maybe as high as 40%!  I'd say roughly 38% of News is Better Than No News depending on where you're getting your news from.  And what the news is.  Huh.  WAIT A SECOND.  They're not saying News is always bad. They're just saying, regardless of what good or bad news may be, that no news is generally good.  I'm repeating myself but the more I repeat myself the more I understand what I'm repeating! Hmm good practice.  Repeat things you don't understand until you do understand.  It will infuriate the people being forced to listen to you repeat things to yourself but that's their problem.  Look this whole thing was just one paragraph.  The next one will be better okay?
     Sure!  When it comes to CRISES no news is bad news.  No news on CLIMATE CRISIS. Bad news!  We need News on this because status quo ain't good.  That sort of thing.  Didn't I promise I would leave News Stuff behind after the end of the last paragraph?  Sure I promise lots of things it's fun.  Travis Scott trampling case.  I feel like Led Zeppelin had a song about Trampling.  Trampled Under Foot or something.  Let's LTURQ.  YEP GOT IT EXACTLY.  I feel like that was one of a dozen or so Led Zeppelin songs that I just skipped over.  Better listen to a clip of it now to see what it was exactly.  Let's load that up.  Oh okay that.  It's been 17 years since I've listened to Led Zeppelin so it sounds mostly new to me.  But I could see myself being like yeah I'd listen to another song over this.  The point is I hope those who died at Trampling Concert aren't Trampling Over Each Other on the stairway to heaven.  They'll just tumble right back down into Hell!
    That's what you get for Trampling.  You should have learnt the first time when it killed you!  Some people never learn.  Like me!  With the No News Good News Saying!  I thought I figured it out after repeating it seven times but now I forget again!  Oh well that's life.  You take the time to learn things and then quickly forget them.  Sounds about right!  The pint is this whole ordeal was a wake up call and we must do more to address Trampling in our country.  Ugh.  Why do I keep talking about this.  Trampling is a funny word and concept to me.  That's my deal!  It's not funny that people died.  It's not funny that I make bad jokes about it.  No one ever said this was supposed to be funny!  I don't know where you got that idea.  This is for providing me a space for repeating things until I understand them.  Anyway I assume the coffee I'm making will be ready on time and fresh and not actually being an hour ahead in making the coffee.  I assume that because Reality Logic.
    Yeah!  I'll be drinking that coffee after one more quick paragraph.  Hopefully.  Paragraph might be slow!  We'll find out I guess.  Gonna shave today.  Been a month since haircut too exactly!  Maybe cut my hair in Oh I Don't Know 2 or 3 more months?  Every 3 months AND Every 4 months are GREAT.  Both divisible into a year perfectly.  Which is important!  If things aren't perfectly divisible then why even bother.  Shaving every 2 weeks.  DIVISIBLE INTO A MONTH.  Look I know what I'm doing when it comes to Doing Things Divisible Like.  HEY today is last day of first week of New Diet.  It's been going great.  So many Pop Tarts!  I wanna say possibly as many as FIVE.  Thought about Toastering it today but decided not to mess with success.  How come Toaster doesn't have a clock.  Why does Coffee need to tell us what time it is but not a toaster.  Coffee Machine thinks it's so great?  Doesn't make sense!  
     What else should I repeat so I understand it.  Hmm I Dunno!  If I knew I had to repeat it to understand it that might already be understanding it too much!  Sure great what else.  Had a dream we were suddenly into the next MLB Season about a week and I was like hey that was fast.  DAMNIT Didn't sign up for fantasy league before season started.  I can do it now but its just not the same.  So that was fun.  Also the Mets were FOUR AND TWO at the time of the dream.  And I was like HEY THEY'RE ON PACE FOR A SEASON FOR THE AGES.  That sort of thing.  Jeez.  Time to adjust my walking in park/walking down street schedules.  What time it get dark now today.  Sunset be at 4:44!  Sounds like a Jay Z album.  I guess that's what the album was about.  Today's Sunset in my Zip Code.  Didn't see that twist coming when I listened to it several moons ago.
     Sure.  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Solidly not April yet in reality.  Still November!  April'll come quick though.  Gotta imagine the next 5 months will fly by.  Not sure what we'll accomplish over those months.  Probably negative things would be my guess off the top of my head?  Sure.  Dad set the Kitchen Clocks during the half hour between me starting coffee machine and then coming down to retrieve coffee from coffee machine.  Good for him.  Everything back in working order.  Kinda miss the wrong clocks.  When clocks are wrong anything can happen. W e live in a world with no rules when clocks disagree!  And no rules means we can do all the stuff we wanted to do that were against the rules!  Like THE PURGE or something.  Off the top of my head that's the first thing I can think of.  Anyway.  I'd probably stay home for The Purge.  That'd be my first instinct.  Never saw the movie but from what I gather I Think I'll Sit This One Out.
    Okay.  Maybe I should see those movies.  I like horror movies.  Makes sense.  Dunno what I'll shave over yet!  Maybe sink.  Place some paper towels over the sink because facial hair is a little too long to go down the drain.  Then throw out those hairy paper towels in the garbage!  Dunno if people do that routine but my Dad suggested it to me and he's usually on the up and up about things.  What else is going on.  Man oh man is my face gonna be less hairy after tonight.  Now my life will be different-- for the better!  What else is going on.  Probably made 2 good jokes this entry.  Not sure what though.  Off the top of my head Coffee Machine Being High On Itself And Thinking Its Better Than It Is isn't entertaining to you but I kinda liked it.  It's funny because it's true!  What a kick.  Anyway.  I liked talking about Led Zeppelin.  Hey this guy listened to Led Zeppelin a lot Must Have Been A Cool Kid.  That's what I got out of that subject.
    Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Whose the most important person who died in Trampling Concert.  They said 8 people died.  Which of them is the biggest loss and why?  The people demand answers!  Anyway.  Most Important and Biggest Loss aren't analogous.  Who cares I'm done talking about that THAT'S IN THE PAST NOW.  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine if I died at a Trampling Event I'd consider myself the biggest loss.  Pot committed to caring about myself slightly more than everyone else at this point.  More than slightly!  Relatively considerably!  Anyway.  WAIT A SECOND THIS IS A TRAGEDY.  I've gone to concerts before and trampling CAN HAPPEN TO ME.  This issue must be addressed before it happens again!  Hmm.  Has anyone considered that there was one person instigating the trampling and he knew what he was doing?  That person MAY STILL BE OUT THERE.  And he may be coming to a concert NEAR YOU.  I'm scared now.
     Last paragraph of the act.  There are lots of concerts near me I live in a major metropolitan city.  Hmm.  Maybe I've been Fight Clubbing it and it was me.  That would explain a lot.  I thought I was dreaming about Mets Season Starting but IN REALITY I was starting Tramplings around the world.  Sorry I'll stop now.  I'll try to at least.  No guarantees!  What else is going on.  The point is I had AN ENTIRE EXTRA HOUR last night to Do Tramplings.  That's not good-- for other people!  Hmm.  Wait a second.  ASTROWORLD.  And it was IN HOUSTON.  I see what's going on there!  Is Astroworld an oxymoron?  No not really.  Oh well I tried.  Jeez.  Maybe I'm an oxymoron have I ever thought about that?  Yes several times.  Hmm.  Gonna finally look into getting new phone tomorrow.  Gotta do it at some point.  Tomorrow is a great time to do things!  It's Soon but Not Now.  PERFECT.  I'll be back in a little bit.

I Can't Get Over It

    Hey!  Back to write some more paragraphs.  Solidly ahead of schedule today.  Good!  I get to do more stuff like Oh I Don't Know Refresh Web Pages.  Off the top of my head that's the only thing I'm 100% sure I will accomplish.  I don't even LIKE these web pages.  They're just the only web pages I KNOW.  Gotta find some better web pages!  Hmm.  Maybe I could read THIS.  I'm not that desperate!  I've tried reading this and NOT FOR ME.  Writing it though is a joy.  So I got that going for me.  The way I see it is as long as I'm finishing the entry and Time Stamping It after Noon O' Clock it's more or less Not THAT early.  Still a P.M. at the end and not an A.M.?  More or less regular time!  Also for some reason my instinct is I GOTTA AVOID THE A.M.  I'm used to it being a P.M. and an A.M. sounds scary and unfamiliar to me.  YES I think these thoughts every day it's relatively close.  Not really thoughts.  More of a single thought.  And also not even much of a single thought.  Kind Of Nothin' At All!
     Sure.  I get why Microwave has a clock on it.  We need the clock countdown for when we're microwaving things!  Might as well have a regular clock during it's Off Time.  We don't have clock countdown for toaster.  Why microwave.  Microwave has to be more precise than toaster!  I dunno about that have you ever toasted something?  You could argue it needs to be precise too.  Look we can argue whether toaster needs to be more precise or not BUT that doesn't change the fact that microwave still really needs to be precise either way.  I dunno.  The point is I think we as a society have accepted without thinking impreciseness from toasting things.  I don't get why we put up with it!  What else is going on.  It's called a microwave because you can see what's being cooked through the clear glass and wave to your food.  Sure.
     What else is going on.  I like worrying that things are going to explode in the microwave.  For example when you get frozen or so single serving meals and you put them in microwave with cover on.  You know there's SOME EXACT TIME where it will explode if you leave it in too long.  You just gotta hope each time that it's not gonna happen in the time you've allotted.  Also a lot of times you need to leave it in longer than they say you should.  So now you really know you're tempting fate!  Anyway I feel like at some point in my younger years I've had things explode in the microwave.  Not lately, though!  But it could happen any day I Just Don't Know!  Maybe some things are supposed to be cooked in the microwave with a CONTROLLED Explosion.  Yeah that's popcorn.  Yes exactly.  I know sometimes people shorthand cooking in microwave as nuking something but that's not really it, right?  We're not ACTUALLY dropping a small controlled nuclear bomb on our food, right?  No of course not.  Then countries trying to figure out nuclear bombs would have a pretty easy template right in front of them.
    Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Then again I'd try eating something that was cooked by a microscopic nuclear bomb.  Why Not I Like Trying New Things.  Anyway.  Gotta think of some stuff to do today.  Got Day of The Dead: The TV Show Experience to watch.  Got SNL: Also A TV Show Experience to watch.  I feel like I wanna work in some Video Games but I don't have any that strike my fancy!  I could buy a new video game for the X-box 360.  That wouldn't arrive today though!  I could go get it from a GAMESTOP.  But they might be closed for the Sabbath.  One of The Sabbaths.  Not MY Sabbath but there's Plenty Of Other Sabbaths going on for Sundays.  GAME STOP?  I WANT GAME TO CONTINUE.  ACTUALLY GAME HASN'T EVEN STARTED YET IN FIRST PLACE.  That sort of thing.  Hmm just checked ESPN slash MLB and it looks like the Braves STILL have won the world series.  Wonderful.
     Last paragraph of the act.  The point is dream reminded me I gotta be ready in MARCH to sign up for a public fantasy baseball league.  Get that draft in before the season starts!  Also this time around I'M PICKING THE BEST PLAYERS POSSIBLE.  Hmm.  Maybe do TWO leagues.  Maybe do FOUR.  FOUR IS TOO MUCH.  Maybe do TWO.  SOUNDS OKAY.  What else is going on.  Is it possible that Travis Scott has had songs in his discography that encourage trampling.  I haven't looked into that yet.  Probably not.  I feel like at this point people would have brought that up.  Unless no one else checked either.  Anyway.  Really makes ya think.  I forget about what.  And what it was that made us think about something.  The point is I am very close to being done with this act.  Gonna take two walks in the park in a row for walks 3 and 4 from now on.  Because I can't take walk 5 (Or any later walks) in the park anymore IT'S TOO DARK.  Whew now we're all on the same page re: my walking routes.  Glad I could finally get that off my chest.

That's All For Today

    Hey!  Time to wrap the entry up.  I get to have coffee during it.  I get to have snapple during it.  I get to Have It During It.  Amazing!  What other music should I brag about listening to when I was 14.  Hmm.  That's a tough one!  Lots of good options.  Lots of BAD options.  Lots and lots of INCORRECT options.  The point is at what point am I gonna shampoo my hair during Cleansing Experience and be like hey now my hair is relatively long that it needs more shampoo.  So far every day I still feel its short enough that I don't need to shampoo That Much OR That Hard.  One day it'll be different!  And for some reason I'm Dreading That Day?  It's more work and uses more resources!  But mostly the work part.  I really gotta get in there with this I Don't Like It.  TOO MUCH WORK.  That sort of thing.
    Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Only male turkey's gobble.  WHAT THE HELL.  Two #111 "Real Facts," in a row.  I don't like it!  Not one bit!  Anyway.  I feel like Snapple is like Fortune Cookie.  Gotta eat the cookie before you can read the fortune.  Gotta take a sip of snapple before I can read the fact.  Also I WANT to take a sip of Snapple.  That's 75% why I started this bottle in the first place!  The point is I guess at some point we were bound to get 2 in a row.  I didn't think it would happen this quickly!  But I was wrong.  DEAD WRONG.  Anyway what else is going on.  NOON right now.  Amazing.  Now you'll see exactly how long it takes me to write the last 3 paragraphs and change today.  I hope it reflects well on me!  Don't want it too be too short a period-- you'd think I'm not trying hard enough.  Don't want it to be too long-- you'd be like it takes him THAT LONG to write THIS SHITTILY?  We'll see how it pans out!
    Amazing.  Oh hey time for The Coffee #2 To Remember.  Look it just took me a long time to microwave my coffee.  That's why The Time Is What It Is.  Blame it on the coffee! How long could it have taken.  I'm not saying!  What else is going on.  Kinda upset there's no Patriotism Fact to go along with this coffee.  At this point I kind of expect it from all my beverages.  What else is going on.  Every time I go a round of sit-ups/push-ups I feel like wait a second now that I think about it Last Time I wasn't really doing it 100%.  Kind of just 80%.  THIS TIME I'm really doing it 100%.  And then I feel the same way the next time.  I guess at this point I'm doing sit-ups/push-ups 600,000% more fully than I was when I started out.  AT LEAST.  That number still seems kind of low.  Anyway.  
    Cool!  I feel like I remember a Burrito from Chipotle blowing up in my microwave.  Probably from around 2009-2010.  So that's good.  I accomplished something in 2009-2010 at least!  Also that was LOOSE.  Not in a closed package or anything that blew up.  Just food itself!  Interesting Very Interesting.  HMM I could get burritos from Chipotle instead of burrito bowls and just have half of them as a meal.  INTERESTING VERY INTERESTING.  Much more interesting than the first thing I said was interesting.  This is REALLY interesting.  So the point is I'll try to remember to think about that.  I have to get at least two meals from Chipotle to justify an order.  That's four meals I'd have to eat in a row.  Spread over a week at most.  DAMNIT now I have to remember to COUNTER-THINK about this.  That's a lot to remember.  I don't think I can remember that much!  Oh well that's life I guess.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Also remember I'm taking sit-up/push-up breaks while writing.  That could add another several weeks to how long these 3 & Change paragraphs are going!  I could have started this entry in August!  Wonderful.  What if I got one burrito and one burrito bowl.  Could that be fit into three meals instead of four?  Hmm.  Gonna have to do some math with that one.  Later!  And by later I mean Possibly Never.  And by Possibly Never I mean I just kind of did it vaguely in my head over the past 10 seconds but that's probably the extent of it.  What else is going on.  I could just lie about when this entry ends.  WHY.  WHO CARES.  AND IF SOMEONE CARED WHAT DIRECTION WOULD THEY CARE IN.  I don't know.  I'm not gonna lie about it though!  I have too much integrity-- Some!  Hey the entry is over now anyway.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:21 P.M.

Saturday, November 6, 2021 

That Doesn't Sound Right

    Hello friends.  What's going on in the wide word of sports.  Shenanigans going on in the house of representatives of the united states of america!  Trying to pass bills separately when they said they would pass them together.  Now one bill's passage is in jeopardy!  That's my understanding of the situation.  About as far as I understand it!  So let's move on to things I DO understand-- uh... hmm... HEY THERE's... no... HMM.  The good news is I hope they know what they're doing.  The bad news is they either Don't Know What They're Doing OR They Know What They're Doing And It's Bad.  Wide world of sports.  Some guy is in trouble for saying he was vaccinated and then he wasn't and then he killed a few people???  I don't have all the details but I think it's an American Football player.  Wonder how popular American Football is in other countries.  Not really wonder it.  I don't actively care.  Just wonder it enough to type out that sentence and then move on with my life.
     Yeah!  Saturday going on.  It's the weekend now!  Let's have fun with it and whatnot.  Enjoying The Black Wonder Years.  I like the characters AND I like the setting.  They live in SOMEWHERE IN AMERICA.  AT SOME POINT IN TIME.  Just like me!  It's called The Wonder Years because when you're a kid you wonder about things.  After you turn 22 you start thinking oh I get the gist of it okay.  Stop wondering!  I'm not sure if the main character in this show is supposed to be a nerd or not.  He wears glasses so you'd think he's on the Nerd Spectrum.  Plus he's always WONDERING things.  But at school he's treated more or less like an average social guy.  I DEMAND ANSWERS.  What else is going on.  Same stuff as every day.  Is it possible that Don Cheadle narrating his life From The Future is actually The Wonder Years.  And now he's wondering about his past.  No that's not possible.  Sorry.  Crunched the numbers.  Total impossibility!
     Oh well that's life.  Also are we supposed to assume/imagine that this kid literally turns into Don Cheadle.  I don't mean REAL Don Cheadle. I  don't think he changes his name to Don Cheadle and becomes an actor.  I mean does this kid grow up to LOOK like Don Cheadle.  Because apparently he grows up to SOUND like Don Cheadle.  Hmm.  Now that I Think about it Don Cheadle's voice doesn't sound that much like this kid's voice!  PLOT HOLE.  Watch out when you're driving down this street there's a PLOT HOLE there!  Maybe he has Voice Modification Surgery what do I know.  Also maybe Voice Modification Surgery is a real thing what do I know. I'd have that surgery!  Just as a goof.  For fun!  I like my voice but let's roll the dice to see if I can get something better!  Maybe all VMS turns our voices into Don Cheadle.  Not sure a Don Cheadle would work for me.  Hmm.
     Fourth paragraph!  Already halfway through the Child's Play TV Show.  I like that show!  Soon I'm gonna need a new show to be halfway through though.  DANGIT.  Why can't they make TV seasons 48 episodes long like they did in the past.  You get a month off to regroup each year THAT'S MORE MONTHS THAN MOST PEOPLE GET.  Also maybe you get half a year to regroup and just work at a rate where you're making TV Episodes faster than they can be released on TV.  Maybe lots of things!  Anyway.  Don't I Hate TV.  I talk about that every entry.  Yeah I hate it but I Wish There Was More Of It!  I don't see what's so complicated about that.  Parody of Eternals-- E.T. URINALS.  Not sure what it means.  Places where E.T. The Extra Terrestrial can relieve himself?  Does ET have relatively normal genitalia?  We should know because I don't think he's ever wearing pants.  Maybe he is.  Never saw the movie!  Had to google, "Genitalia," to see how its spelled because Microsoft FrontPage wasn't giving me any good answers.  That's how a Crazy Person searches for porn.  Hmm gonna have to keep that in my back pocket.
     All I know about E.T. is that he can't ride a bike and needs someone to do it for him.  I learnt about it in Production Company Logos at the beginning of other movies.  I think the gold standard for Production Company Logos is The Universal Logo with the Rotating Earth.  That's Rotating right?  Earth Rotates itself and Revolutions around the sun.  I dunno, could be Rotating around the sun too.  Either way That Logo is A Classic.  Love it!  Also I like how every 15 years they update the graphics quality to make it more better.  Very exciting when that happens!  Anyway.  The last few sentences I've had a thought in the back of my head Hmm I Wonder What Company Universal Is A Part Of.  And then I thought well that's pretty dumb.  It's Universal.  But it might have a parent company!  Let's LTURQ.  OWNED BY COMCAST?  I don't like that!  Comcast sounds dumb to me.  Universal should own Comcast if anything!  And not even that!  Owning compcast is BENEATH Universal!
     Got coffee going on.  Not the best coffee cup, not the worst one!  Solid!  Dependable!  I'm happy with it overall.  Anyway the last few days I've upped my Artificial Sweetener count from 5 packets per coffee to 6.  TREAT MYSELF WHY NOT.  Probably not good for my liver or something.  Gotta imagine it's bad for some organs and liver comes to mind immediately.  Oh well that's life.  Some sort of Trampling Mass Death at a music festival.  Sorry!  It's terrible of course and a tragedy but I can't be the only one who has 5% of their thought process in the back of their head well that's weird.  KIND OF funny?  Getting trampled to death by a crowd listening to music?  Not sure what's wrong with me.  It just seems like a funny scenario if no one had gotten seriously hurt.  TRAMPLINGS ARE NO LAUGHING MATTER.  Unless they happen to our enemies.  BUT THESE PEOPLE AT MUSIC CONCERT WERE DECENT FINE PEOPLE WHOSE LIVES WERE CUT TOO SHORT.  Well when you put it THAT WAY SURE it sounds bad.  Hmm.
     What else is going on.  Part of it is-- incorrectly-- thinking they only have themselves to blame.  They must have been PART OF THE TRAMPLERS if they were in the middle of it.  Not true!  Not true at all!  But that's how I imagine it.  Also can't really imagine it.  That's another aspect.  Anyway I hope at all future music concerts they have anti-trampling technology deployed 24/7.  Hmm that's a long music concert.  Sure is!  The point is if I was at a Trampling Music Concert I'd get trampled in no time.  Too small a person!  Gotta imagine that'll work against me heavily in a trampling scenario.  Doesn't seem right.  Biden talking up passing his great infrastructure bill.  He does realize that most Democrats are unhappy right now with what's going on, right?  This is not making his feel good.  Just a reminder that we may not get the other bill at all!  Oh well he probably knows what he's doing.  Or he doesn't.  Or he does and it's bad!  We covered all those possibilities before when talking about Democrats in general!
     Eighth paragraph.  Is there a way we can use TRAMPLING as an analogy as what happened in House of Representatives last night re: These Bills?  My guess?  Sure if we tried hard enough.  Which we won't.  I'm not gonna try any harder than Finishing This Current Sentence Right Now.  What else is going on.  Maybe most Democrats have faith in the other bill passing and are okay with what's going on.  I envy them.  Or pity them.  Or I don't really care that much about them!  I'm gonna go with that.  Doesn't bother me one way or another that much how they feel.  What else is going on.  Can the people who instigated The Tramplings be charged with manslaughter?  My guess?  If they KNEW FOR SURE this guy is the one who started it AND PERSONALLY trampled half a dozen people YES HE CAN BE HELD RESPONSIBLE.  Good luck trying to find That One Guy!  Maybe it was me.  Ever consider that?  I'll get away with it, too!  I have a perfect cover story to throw people off my scent-- I Wasn't There and was half the country away!  No one would EVER suspect me.  Well maybe now they would.  Kinda gave away the ballgame in this paragraph.  Hey that's life.
     What else is going on.  What's the goal of starting a trampling exercise.  HEY I WANNA GET CLOSER TO THE STAGE.  WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S OTHER PEOPLE IN FRONT OF ME.  WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN.  I'M JUST GONNA PUSH ON AHEAD.  That's what I imagine.  Maybe they were trying to get away from the stage.  HEY THIS ISN'T GOING GREAT AND/OR I WANNA GET SOME REFRESHMENTS.  WHAT DO YOU MEAN THERE'S PEOPLE BEHIND ME.  I'M JUST GONNA PUSH ON BEHIND.  What else is going on.  Getting close to being done with Act I.  That's a good milestone in the day.  Most of the milestones in the day are relatively good.  And boy oh boy are there lots of mile stones.  Is Travis Scott hip hop or rock n' roll.  Black or white.  Musician or POSER.  Let's LTURQ. RAPPER BLACK AND... I dunno if he's a poser or not!  Not for me to say.  The COURTS will decide that.  Gotta imagine that's his key defense in Trampling Case.  I can't be blamed I'm A GOOD Musician.  I hope for all of our sakes that's the case.
     Last paragraph of the act.  Great!  Also if you're close enough for Tramplings you're certainly close enough to be spreading Pandemic.  Yet no one is talking about THAT.  Well maybe they are.  I haven't done enough research into the subject.  The point is I'd like to finish this paragraph so I can make it to Milestone.  Which I assume is a reference to in Olden Days when they would set a Stone every mile on a path so people could see it while walking and/or riding horses and be like oh it's been another mile gotcha thanks.  Anyway I generally think Metric System is good and American System is dumb BUT Miles are better than Kilometers. In that one case We Got It Right.  Anyway.  That's gotta be SOME STONE if we recognize it from any other stones laying around.  Sure is!  Wow.  I'll be back in a little bit.

Keep Your Head Up

    What's going on friends.  Gonna write some more paragraphs now.  Because that's what I'm good at!  I'm not good at it PERSAY.  But... uh... I'm good at Just Doing It.  In life I'm good at accomplishing paragraphs regardless of their quality one way or another.  TRUE.  Anyway.  What kind of stuff can I accomplish watching on the television set today.  Hmm.  No way of knowing yet!  That will be revealed to me throughout the course of the day.  Partly revealed TO ME and partly revealed FROM ME.  It's roughly 50/50 in terms of Me Being Told What To Watch By TV and/or Me Telling TV What To Show.  We meet somewhere in the middle and I feel that's a fair compromise.  Hmm.  PERSAY isn't recognized as a word.  I'm okay with that.  I know I said it but I still think it's dumb too.  Glad we're all on the same page!
    Sure.  Another day into November.  That's fine!  I got no problem with the calendar advancing one day at a time in the order we all expected.  Better than the alternative I guess!  I gotta think of some good stuff to Tell Television Set to play.  The more I tell TV Set and the less it tells me The Better!  I wanna be the dominant one in this relationship IF POSSIBLE.  Okay we get the point with the TV WHAT ELSE IS GOING ON.  Not much!  Enjoying diet so far  Was originally gonna cut diet in half then I cut it only by a third and at this point In Practice I'm actually only cutting it by a fourth.  But it's EASY AND FUN AND DELICIOUS.  So it's working out Well IN MY FAVOR.  I'm totally coming out on top in this scenario 100%!  No give and take where I'm compromising what I eat and what I don't eat with some external force.  It's all up to me and I enjoy that independence!
     Then again if TV tells me I should or shouldn't eat something SURE MAYBE I'd take that UNDER CONSIDERATION.  Nah.  What else is going on.  Saw an ad for The Black Wonder Years on a bus just this past walk.  Great!  I like it when public transportation tells us what to watch on TV.  I trust public transportation to be looking out for the public's best interest implicitly so if they say a show is good then it must be good!  I assume they're choosing these ads based on the qualities of the shows and not on being paid by the show.  If they were getting paid by the show what am I giving them bus fare all the time for.  I'm busy paying with my eyeballs absorbing their advertisements.  Sounds like they're getting me coming and going in this ALBEIT UNLIKELY Scenario where they're getting paid to advertise The Black Wonder Years.  Sure great what else is going on.
     Sure great what else is going on.  I already said that.  And I Meant It!  Jeez.  Maybe The Bus and The Wonder Years have a symbiotic relationship where in the plot on The Wonder Years they make the case for public transportation.  You scratch your back and I'll scratch mine!  They each get something out of the deal.  Maybe!  What else is going on.  Not sure if I ever had an itchy back in my life.  I guess I'm just lucky that way.  Not sure what I'd do if I did, though.  Maybe hammer a nail into the wall and then rub Where It Itches on the nail.  Off the top of my head that's one way to go.  Maybe we should just Evolve a way to scratch our backs.  More pliable arms or something off the top of my head.  I dunno, I'm not Natural Selection!  Let Survival Of The Fittest figure it out.  New Mayor Eric Adams is taking his first few paychecks in Bitcoin.  So either he's crazy or he's corrupt and wants to make money on Bitcoin or a little bit of both.  My guess is a little bit of both!  That's the best case scenario.  I don't want him ALL Crazy or ALL Out To Enrich Himself Financially.  If he's a little crazy and a little out to enrich himself financially that's something I can work with!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  We should have known he'd be a little crazy.  His name is Eric Adams.  Don't trust a guy with two first names!  That's rule number one!  Anyway.  What's rules number 2 through 5.  I dunno gotta keep reading to find that out!  What else is going on.  At what point during Trampling did Travis Scott (another person with two names) stop singing.  And be like no wait a second STOP YOU GUYS.  THIS AIN'T RIGHT!  Probably At Some Point one would imagine.  Also he can't blame himself for what happened.  Sure it only happened because he was doing such a great job at rapping that the crowd got TOO Excited but we can't blame him for that completely.  What else is going on.  Gonna take a nice bath right about now.  Come back with some more paragraphs.  Possibly as High Quality as C+ Paragraphs!!! 

That's All I Got

    Hey!  Time to wrap up the entry.  Relatively.  Five paragraphs could Go Quick or it could Go Slow.  It's all up to me!  Well it'll go about the same amount of time as always.  But it's up to me whether I interpret it as quick or slow.  So I got that going for me.  I get to interpret things however I want!  About time!  HEY I'm up to a nice Tales From That Crypt episode next.  I could watch that easily.  It's the one with Ghost Buster Ernie Hudson.  He plays a character different than one who is a Ghost Buster though.  Not sure why.  But that's the direction they decided to go in!  Also I'm sure people have went there before but what are the ethical considerations about just taking ghosts and TRAPPING AND ENSLAVING THEM in a box?  I've got some concerns!  Doesn't seem right to me!  It's for OUR good they might HAUNT us.  So what they're ghosts!  That's what they do if they feel like it!  We'd want the same freedoms when we're ghosts!  Not only have other people went there but its entirely possible I've went there.  Great just great.
     Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- Only male turkey's gobble.  WELL I'VE GOT A BIG PROBLEM WITH THAT.  I don't think the apostrophe is correct.  The male turkey doesn't possess the gobble!  Solid 75% chance I'm Right and Snapple Is Wrong.  I'd LTURQ but I feel like I'm happy settling for being Pretty Sure I'm Right.  The point is how am I supposed to trust these FACTS if I can't even trust the GRAMMAR.  I thought I was being cute about doubting the Patriotism Facts in the past but now I don't know!  Like I said solid 25% chance I'm Wrong.  Oh well that's the life I chose.  IS gobble a noun.  It wouldn't make sense though.  That'd be a Sentence Fragment if it were a noun.  Only Male Turkey's Gobble.  Only male turkey's gobble WHAT.  Alright I think we can Call This A Paragraph.  It should have been two sentences.  But I decided differently!
    Hey great got coffee #2 doing.  I meant to say going at first.  But ya know what?  I'm happier with Doing!  Got coffee doing.  I like it.  Now I'm happy!  I was upset before In Life but somehow this turned it all around.  Gotta wonder how long that will last.  ...Actually you don't have to wonder.  ALREADY OVER.  The point is I had a great time while it lasted.  What else is going on.  Gonna have a nice break between Entry and next walk.  Those are fun and at this point standard!  Apparently Bipartisan Infrastructure Bill has lots of money for public transportation.  GREAT.  That's one of my favorite things!  Maybe now they won't have to advertise TV shows on busses.  They won't have to but they still may CHOOSE to.  I guess I'm okay with that.  I'd need to know what kind of board is choosing what to put on busses and whether they're representing what's truly best for the people.  Huh.
     Penultimate paragraph.  Unsafe to advertise things on busses!  All the other cars and transportation devices in the street will be like HEY LOOK AT THAT BUS ADVERTISEMENT WHAT DOES IT SAY and then they crash into each other.  Seems like a pretty obvious result from this practice.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  The transportation decides won't say that.  The people driving them will say it.  They're not KITT from Knight Rider.  Maybe ONE of them is.  They can't ALL Be though.  There's only one!  I assume.  Never saw the show.  Nor am I familiar with the true story it was based on.  The point is hey we're getting pretty close to being done with the entry.  That's something everybody can enjoy!  Everyone who makes it to the end, at least!  If you bailed out halfway through you don't get the pleasure of Seeing It Actually Ending!
     Last paragraph.  Other cars talk.  Like the cars from that film about cars that was called Cars.  Never saw that movie either.  I assume its about talking cars.  Huh.  YEAH but that wasn't a REAL movie like Knight Rider it was animated.  Oh.  Okay.  Good point.  Except for the fact that KNIGHT RIDER WAS A TV SHOW NOT A MOVIE.  Anyway what else is going on.  Guess I'll put on the Tales From That Crypt episode I was thinking about when I'm done with this paragraph.  That'd be a fun 26 minutes or so.  And I am in the mood for a fun 26 minutes.  Much rather have that than the alternative.  Which is I DON'T KNOW.  I can't imagine having Any More NOR Any Less fun than watching that The Tales From That Crypt episode right now.  That's presumably what's gonna happen so it's all I could imagine!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:54 P.M.

Friday, November 5, 2021 

I Believe In Me

    Hey!  Got a Super Market delivery coming this morning.  Could interrupt this Act at any time!  Including never. Never is a time!  One of the main times.  Most common time is Never, then Always, then At Some Point(s).  So we got that going for us.  Looking forward to Putting Things Away.  It's like a game of tetris but this time it's for real.  Also EASY.  Easier than Tetris!  I feel like when you're doing good in tetris it should start getting slower not faster.  They should REWARD you for being good not punishing you.  Makes sense!  Made that same joke 20 times with Other Things Besides Tetris.  It's a good joke!  By which I mean takes 2 or 3 sentences to go through.  Takes up space.  Things that take up space are good!  Without them there'd be way too much space.
     Sure.  What do I got in store for today.  Maybe take a Klonopin!  Those are fun.  I'm totally more relaxed after taking them!  Anyway I realized that when I was doing Music Open Mics I would regularly like 2-3 Klonopins AND/OR Ritalins throughout the night.  And I never really thought of it.  Just felt like hmm this makes sense couldn't hurt.  Now, looking back, people must have SEEN the effects of that in me.  Hey this guy looks overly relaxed and/or Ritalin'd wonder what that's all about.  Cool!  Music people think I do drugs and/or am Cool and/or hopped up on ADD Drugs!  No matter how they interpret it I'm Coming Out On Top!  Either that or no one cares.  That's good for me too!  Think of all I could get away with in life with No One Caring!  Hmm.  Nothing much I Wanna get away with.  Oh well.
     Sure.  Drank plenty of beer and smoked many cigarettes too!  Now they really think I'm one cool customer.  Customers aren't cool.  The people who are servicing the customers have all the power.  They're the cool ones!  Then again if we stop believing Customers Are Cool our entire economy will collapse.  And then where would we be.  Somewhere, I guess.  Probably same place as before.  I'm not going anywhere!  Dunno where else I would go.  Maybe the movie theater.  They've got very comfortable seats which could double as beds.  I'd have to work out an arrangement with the manager and/or general manager and/or director of baseball operations but if I COULD I WOULD.  I think they should let homeless people sleep in theaters and whatnot anyway.  Good for the homeless, good for the theaters!  Maybe if you get homeless people to watch special screenings of movies at night they'd be motivated to get a job.  SO they could watch more movies.  Something along those lines.
    Sure homeless people don't have jobs because they're not motivated.  That's why I don't have a job!  More or less.  I'm not homeless.  YES but I might be once the economy collapses because of lack of cool customers-- we covered this last paragraph!  What else is going on.  Stuff I have to put away immediately is Fridge and Freezer stuff.  COOL stuff.  ALRIGHT.  I get to live vicariously through the Cold Keeping Devices and feel cool for a bit while the doors are briefly open.  Just enough for a taste!  Amazing.  Gonna probably have some bread today.  Will it be moldy?  M yguess? Not to the naked eye!  Good enough for me.  What's a dressed eye.  Eye wearing a microscope.  Oh okay.  I haven't worn eye contact lenses in a year and a half.  Seems like kind of an oversight.  Almost a pun here.  Eyes and sights.  Gonna have to look into that one.  I don't have to.  And I Don't want to.  Guess I'm not gonna do it!
     Yeah!  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Got coffee brewin'.  No potential Super Market delivery is gonna stop me from drinking coffee!  Might interrupt or delay me drinking coffee!  Bu that's as bad as it'll get.  Also SPOILER ALERT I started typing, "Super Market," before realizing OH NO I DIDN'T ITALICIZE THE, "SUPER!"  So I changed it.  Whew.  That was a close one.  Also Italics means I LIKE IT.  And if it was in Quotes it would mean I DON'T LIKE IT.  Italics means I believe it's super and I do!  They got all the products one might want except for the ones not in stock and the ones that they just generally don't offer at all!  Sure.  You know what game I'm bad at.  SCRABBLE.  I saw I was talking about Tetris before.  Reminded me of Scrabble!  No good at Scrabble!  Which is odd because I know hundreds of words.  They just don't occur to me immediately!  Also are you sure I can't use names?  I wanna use names!  It's the forbidden fruit that tastes the sweetest.  Hey great first half of Act is Over.
    Lemme clarify.  I think it's great THAT the first half of the first act is over.  I don't think The Great First Half Of The First Act is over.  It was pretty bad all in all!  Anyway I'm typing quickly because I got accepting Super market delivery on the mind!  Hmm I should have that on the mind EVERY entry.  I like going quickly.  Quality is The Same Suckiness If Not More but boy oh boy does it take me several minutes less!  Point is what else is going on.  What kind of responsibilities I gotta do.  Get phone.  PHONE?  OVER THE INTERNET?  I'm used to getting phone in person.  Now how do I worry about handing over my phone to a live person and worrying they're gonna pretty two buttons and be like Oh So THIS is the porn you were trying to cover up.  That's the kind of true human interaction I crave!  Also that's the kind of porn I was trying to cover up.  That exact scenario!  Go figure!  Seeing that would make them uncomfortable!  OR, alternatively, VERY comfortable.
     Sure.  I wouldn't mind a new phone from scratch.  Maybe I can keep my old phone so I could re-do Contact List myself.  That sounds like fun.  I get to discard half of them!  Wow HALF OF EIGHT PEOPLE?  What's that.  Roughly four.  Off the top of my head that's as good an estimate as you're getting from me.  Seventh paragraph.  Great estimate from me there.  I know for sure almost.  Anyway coffee mugs are all clean so I'm going with my #1 favorite one.  Lucky me!  What else is Lucky Me.  I got the weekend going on coming up.  I get to SHAVE Sunday night.  Routine.  Gonna be great.  Also I feel like I'm getting the hang of it!  I know how to press Shaver against my skin and move it around and all that stuff.  Took me a lot of time to figure it out but all my hard work practicing is really paying off!  No it isn't.  I still have some trouble.  I'm just trying to sound Cool by saying I got it all figured out.  Did it work?  Do you think I'm cool now?  One can only imagine YES.
     Eighth paragraph!  Amazing.  I like shaving and being like nope not sure that patch of hair should still be there.  Better shave over it some more.  And again.  And again.  LOOK I know I'm at a setting leaving SOME hair but this is too much.  And then I look at it later and am like oh okay this is pretty standard for what I got going on across the board.  So sometimes you just gotta trust your electric razor knows better than you do with your first impressions and naked eyes.  I think we should trust machines MORE All The Time.  They know what they're doing.  Let's just sit back and let machines do everything.  Makes sense.  Also I'm talking about machines WITHOUT Artificial Intelligence.  Like my electric razor.  We can't let Intelligence Machines do everything.  They'd take over in no time!  No, we need Totally Completely DUMB Machines that we can implicitly trust to do everything for us.  Hmm good compromise.
     Ninth paragraph!  Wonderful.  If Super market delivery doesn't come during Act I, I have to wait around before I can take Walk II!  Hopefully not too long.  Too long a wait could ruin my day more or less!  DAMNIT I specifically was counting on today NOT being ruined.  Eh it'll be alright.  Slightly ruined schedule, what's the worst that could happen.  I DON'T EVEN WANNA IMAGINE.  The apocalypse!  World blows up!  Probably wouldn't happen but ya never know!  Anyway enjoying a fresh pair of underwear and/or socks today.  No, "OR."  AND!  Same socks as always.  I got four or five pairs of socks and they're all the same.  I haven't worn white socks in a long time!  Kind of miss em.  Need to find me some white socks.  Either way for now these socks'll get the job done no problem.  Who wears Red Socks.  I don't think the Red Sox even wear Red Socks.  Maybe Santa Claus.  Kinda could imagine him wearing red socks.  That's about it!  Look I better LTURQ.  Red Socks.  SOME BRITISH MEN WEAR RED SOCKS.  I'm gonna need some time to process how I feel about that.
     The point is how many gifts does Santa siphon away to keep for himself.  Gotta imagine Santa's Palace is loaded with toys that, "Got Lost In The Shuffle."  I don't trust this guy one bit.  There's no oversight!  What else is going on.  Why is it good to teach little kids gifts come from some weirdo every year and not from their loving generous parents.  What do kids get out of that.  Nothing It's FUN.  I'll take your word for it.  Wait no I won't.  I'm gonna Doubt your word for it!  Deal with THAT.  Anyway.  Dunno what to do in the meantime between Entry and Super Market Delivery.  Maybe some Television Set.  But WHAT should be on it?  That's the question!  Hmm any good commercials playing this half hour.  Probably.  Could switch around some channels until I find one I like.  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.

Hey Where'd You Come From

    Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- "Dolphins are unable to smell." Who cares.  What do they need to be smelling anyway.  Nothin'!  That's all I got.  Anyway Super market delivery came right after I finished act I!  No time to even think about what I would do in the meantime while waiting.  So that worked out great for me.  I feel like a solid 30% of things work out great for me.  And 50% of things are neutral.  And then 90% of things work out against me.  Hmm.  The point is I got everything I wanted!  Both in Super Market and in life.  A corollary to lots of things going great for me-- I often get what I want for the most part! It's all due to a low threshold for satisfaction!  Works out great all the time.  Anyway today if Friday the Fifth.  I feel like that should be a thing.  Not sure why.  Probably for no good reason.  Not even any bad reasons I can think of.  Drawing a blank.
     HEY 7 days after 5 is 12.  12 is my Birthday Day.  Friday the 5th directly leads to Friday My Birthday Day!  WOW that's a VERY SOLID Bad Reason.  So I got a reason after all it turns out.  Hey my birthday day AND month are coming up.  I'm going to celebrate it by Not Dying (Presumably).  Totally try to stay alive the entire 24 hours.  As a gift to myself!  Anyway.  One guy I see a lot on my walks is this big guy whose probably in his early or mid 20's and looks like he's got Brain Developmental Problems.  And he looks weird and dumb!  I saw him today Wearing SUN GLASSES.  And my instinct was HEY THIS GUY IS LOOKING PRETTY GOOD NOW GOOD FOR HIM.  He's figured it out!  So if he could figure it out that gives hope to the rest of us.  Also is the message Sun Glasses?  Is sun glasses just what worked for him or is that what would Take Us ALL To The Next Level.  Gonna have to look into that.
     Anyway.  I like seeing people in reflective sunglasses where they're like 50% mirrors.  HEY I CAN SEE MYSELF IN THERE.  I LIKE MYSELF.  WONDERFUL.  I guess.  What else is going on.  I watched a movie last night that was 75 minutes and I can't say exactly what happened.  Something about Horror.  People were in a house and then Horror Happened To Them.  Look I need more than 75 minutes to be able to absorb a story.  I need EIGHTY FIVE minutes.  Also add 5 minutes to the beginning, 3 minutes to the middle, and 2 minutes to the end for maximum impact.  That sort of thing!  Anyway down to the last dozen or so That Twilight Zone episodes to watch.  Those are fun.  I like the part where Everyone Is Dumb Because They're From Sixty Years Ago. What idiots don't they know no one acts or talks like tat anymore.  That's what I get out of it.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Nothing new or exciting from Super market delivery.  Well, lemme change that.  Nothing new.  LOTS of Exciting things.  I'm excited about the same stuff I got last week.  The stuff I kept putting off to eat till the end of the week.  But THIS WEEK I'm REALLY into it.  Gonna be great.  Think I'll have a sandwich today.  I normally wouldn't, "Go There," but we talked about My Bread Situation yesterday and you should know I'll have some bread EARLY this week so it should be okay.  WHEW THAT'S A RELIEF FOR YOU.  You must have been worried all day long yesterday this guy is gonna eat bad bread and then that's gonna be the end of him.  Bread won't be bad today!  Now maybe it'll be bad by THE NEXT Sandwich but that's a problem for The Future.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Not sure which sandwich I should have.  I got TURKEY and I got HAM.  Normally I wouldn't Go There but what's One Time talking about sandwich meat I could have gonna do.  DESTROY THE WORLD SOMEHOW.  I don't think that'll happen.  If I thought it was a possibility I'd probably go back and erase it.  Just to play it safe!  But it's not so I won't.  Ham is slightly more calories.  Not too much more!  Turkey is slightly more what I'm used to.  THIS IS A TOUGH ONE.  And I'm gonna have the other one as a sandwich later in the week.  Assuming I don't Look At Bread and am like well CLEARLY JUST BY LOOKING AT IT I shouldn't eat this.  In which case I dunno we'll cross that bridge when we get to it.  Unless we wanna stay on this side of the bridge.  In which case we'll make that bridge decision when we get to the bridge.  I'll be back in a little bit. Are people upset I talked about possible meal today.  I'D be upset.  I'll make it up to you with next paragraphs okay?  I'll be back in a little bit.

I Don't Remember That

    Hello friends.  Gotta write a good 5 paragraphs because I promised I would because I spent at least one paragraph on Sandwich talk.  Was it lunch talk or was it dinner talk?  I'LL NEVER TELL!!!! ...It was lunch talk.  Why did I have to tell.  I like saying things.  Anyway what else is going on.  Started dieting at the beginning of the week with the premise I'd snack more and I've had more ANIMAL CRACKERS and ONE OR TWO CHIPS AT A TIME but Just Now was the first time I had a real Snack.  We're talking Fiber One Brownie Bar!  DELICIOUS and NUTRITIOUS.  And also I'm doing what I set out to do.  Eat snack.  Good for me!  Oh No now I'm talking more about food.  This is SNACK talk everyone likes SNACK talk.  It reminds them of times they've eaten and/or will eat snacks IN THEIR LIFE.
     Sure.  Gonna have a decent sized break between Entry and Walk.  AGAIN people can relate to this.  I remember times in my life and/or times in the future where I will have midsized breaks between Entries and Walking is what's going on in your b rain whether you know it or not.  What else.  Had my snapple for the entry but I still have coffee #2 coming up very soon.  Delicious!  Hey I remember drinking coffee. This Is The Best Thing I've Ever Read.  That's YOU.  Anyway.  I think I'm pretty good at turning off bath faucet quickly after I think Yeah I'm About Done With The Running Water.  Some people may take 30 seconds!  A minute!  WHAT A WASTE OF WATER.  I'm shutting that faucet off TEN SECONDS AT MOST after I think to shut it off.  The point is HERO.  Hey let's call this sandwich a Hero.  Well I'm sure it's OKAY and DOES IT'S JOB but lets not blow it of proportion.
    Got coffee going.  Delicious but lets not blow it out of proportion.  NAH let's blow it out of proportion!  This is the greatest thing that's ever happened to anybody ever!  That sort of thing.  Let's be honest though, the greatest thing that's ever happened to anybody ever will NOT be this coffee but rather Finishing This Entry.  I get to Spell Check and Post It To Internet in a 2-3 minute Cooling Down Period when it's done.  Then I get to move on to the next thing!  Which invariably is what's on TV Oh No Nothing This Is Terrible What Has Become Of My World.  Maybe should check what's on TV NOW so I'm well prepared.  Kinda know what's on TV.  Same stuff as yesterday more or less.  That'd be my hypothesis.  What else is going on.  HEY let's call this Sandwich a SUBWAY Sandwich.  Look I'm sure this sandwich operates as public transportation and gets us from place to play SOMEWHAT but Let's Not Blow It Out Of Proportion!  This is The End Result of Sandwich Talk.  That's what ya get in the end!
     Penultimate paragraph!  Musta been scary for people in the first subway trains.  We're UNDERGROUND?  WHAT IF THE CEILING FALLS APART AND GROUND LEVEL CRUSHES US.  That's how I'd feel today if I ever really thought about it.  Luckily I never really thought about it!  That's a relief.  The point is I'm not gonna get sunglasses so people will think I'm less dumb but I probably should.  Maybe Sun Eye Contact Lenses.  Same principle.  But just localized in your eyeball.  That would be convenient Sign Me Up.  Anyway.  My main strategy of wearing glasses when I'm out and about is Just Not Wearing Glasses.  Can't see clearly but who cares I'm not missing anything.  I know what's going on around me enough more or less.  Also this way glasses last longer because I use them only half the time.  It's cost effective and its called MONEYBALL you wouldn't understand.
     Last paragraph!  It's called MONEYBALL you wouldn't understand.  I'd like to see a ball that's made out of a wad of money.  Money bills.  Somehow formed into a sphere and it stays together.  Sign me up to Look At That!  Also I'm imagining it as the size of a baseball.  Because Moneyball in reality refers to Baseballs.  But it could be any size or even shape!  Basketball sized.  Football shape.  CURLING.  What's curling.  Is that the thing with the discs.  I'd look at a money disc.  What else is going on.  Also is it disc or discus.  I feel like I've seen Discus somewhere.  Let's Discuss.  HEY the entry is just about over almost.  I feel like I accomplished a lot.  It's a solid Several Hours Later than it was when I first started!  Gotta do something with these hours and that's exactly what I did!  SOMETHING!!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:36 P.M.

Thursday, November 4, 2021 

Look Who's Here

    Hello friends.  Here to write another entry.  Gonna involve Writing Many Words In A Row.  Am I up to the challenge?  Sure, why not.  Gotta be Up To Something.  Pretty cold outside!  Pretty warm inside!  I thought I was unhappy with how cold it was outside until I came inside and was even more unhappy with how warm it is inside.  If only there was something I could do about it.  Maybe if I work on it I can limit the heat difference inside to ... HEY THE HEAT JUST TURNED OFF.  I was in the middle of a terrible Global Warming joke and then I heard The Heat Which Was Going STOP GOING.  I guess it got the message that Iw as fed up with it.  Either that or it saw me making a terrible Global Warming joke and was like I GOTTA STOP THIS!  THINK HEAT, THINK!  I KNOW I'LL STOP.  So it saved the day.  Also I was ready to make a joke where I'm confused about Celsius and Fahrenheit.  That's as far as I got.  I was thinking half a sentence ahead.  I'm gonna make some sort of joke that Celsius and Fahrenheit confuse me.  So we were spared that is the point.
     Yeah!  Looks like New Jersey Governor is still Blue!  Alright!  I've always considered New Jersey to be like New York Jr.  Not 100% sure why.  There's other states that border on New York.  Yeah but not with, "NEW," in the name.  So the point is New Jersey is like a surrogate New York to me and I'm glad that some guy named Murphy is Governor it makes me think of The Departed.  That was a good movie.  HEY Good Movie that makes me think of CELSIUS AND FAHRENHEIT.  WHAT'S THE DEAL WITH THAT AM I RIGHT.  I dunno.   So far the entry has had NOTHING going for it.  Cold outside hot inside.  Great.  That's Just Wonderful.  What a genius.  Anyway.  New Asian American lady mayor of Boston.  Makes me think of The Departed.  How come there were no Asian American Lady Mayors in THAT movie.  Let alone in ANY movie.  I can't think of any more than 1 or 2 dozen movies with Asian American Female Mayors of Boston as main characters.  What about real life.  Real Life Is A Movie.  I'm gonna have to look into that.
     Huh.  A Joke with Good Will Hunting.  Man I'm knocking out these jokes EASY this entry.  Joke about Celsius and Fahrenheit.  Joke about Global Warming.  Joke about Good Will Hunting. Jokes are EASY AS FUCK when you don't have to make them.  Amazing.  Hmm.  The premise though is that the jokes would have been so bad that Not Making A Joke is Funnier than whatever the joke would have been.  Makes sense.  Had a delicious Pop Tart for breakfast today.  I love my new diet!  Gotta imagine the novelty of that won't wear off as of Tomorrow or so.  Anyway.  I think 3 out of the 5 propositions I voted for were defeated. Wait WHAT?  You're saying my vote didn't count?  Can I sue someone about this?  And if so can I pick whoever I want?  Can I also pick whether I win the suit or not?  Hmm.  Tried De-Odor-ant yesterday!  Went pretty good!  I enjoy the smell AND I enjoy the name of the flavor smell.  Everest.  Oh I get it its COOL.  Everest is snow capped.  Just like my armpits now.
     Great!  Also now I'm A Mountain Of A Man.  Compared to little children at least.  So I got that going for me.  Wait a second the De-odor-ant brand Under Armour.  I JUST GOT THAT.  It goes UNDER YOUR ARM... OUR!  Good for them.  Under Armour isn't a de-odor-ant brand.  They make lots of Other Things.  Still though gotta imagine a lot of it goes Under Your Arm.  This premise has fallen apart quickly.  Oh well what can ya do.  Can't wait to stand in the doorway to take my next walk.  Gonna be real comfortable for a period of eight seconds.  Yeah!  What else is going on.  I'm getting close to Coffee &/V being halfway done with Act I.  I like that.  Because so far it's terrible and I want it to be over.  I want The Terrible to be over, not the entire entry.  I want to Turn Entry Around!  Really!  I care so much about the quality of the entry you don't even know!  You probably were misdirected on account of how clearly I Don't Care At All about the quality of what I present based on apparently feeling comfortable presenting it to you.  But you're wrong it eats me up inside!
    Sure.  What else eats me up inside.  That's what the people wanna hear!  Well, a lot of things.  Being mediocre is one of the main ones though sure.  Watching too much TV.  I have a love hate relationship with TV.  I hate to love it!  Do I also love to hate it?  No! I hate to hate it!  Hate to hate it, hate to love it.  Hate-hate.  But 1/4th love also.  Hmm.  I'd love to not love it.  Is that different than the first few things I said.  I went a few years without TV completely and it was great! Oh well what can ya do.  TV wins in the end as long as it's there.  Damnit!  So that eats me up inside.  What's a third thing.  Looking around the room.  See Kurt Cobain Collection Of Journalings.  Does that eat me up inside or remind me of something that eats me up inside.  YEAH.  I DON'T LIKE THE COVER TO THE BOOK.  IT'S TOO RED.  EVERYONE KNOWS KURT COBAIN WASN'T A RED PERSON.  Not sure what his favorite color was.  Maybe it was red!  And not knowing eats me up inside.
    You know what doesn't eat me up inside?  What I'm eating up Outside!  New diet is delicious!  So I got that going for me.  That's important.  You might be a terrible Life Liver but if you're happy eating then at least you got that going for you.  HEY Snapple fact of the day-- A day on Venus lasts longer than a year on Venus.  I guess I'll have to take their word for it.  I could look it up.  Yeah but I'm Not Gonna Do That.  So I CHOOSE to take their word for it.  Also HOW DOES THIS HELP ME AT ALL.  I'm not going to Venus!  Give me something I CAN USE.  Who decided men are from Mars and women are from Venus.  I think they're wrong.  I have it on good authority we're all from Earth.  And even IF we were from other planets I don't think you've done enough research to say FOR CERTAIN we're from these planets or not!  ALSO "Everything I ever needed to learn I learned in Kindergarten."  WE GOT UNIVERSAL PRE K NOW (Hopefully).  GONNA HAVE TO RE-THINK THIS ENTIRE PREMISE.
     Sure.  Everything I ever had to learn I learnt on Venus.  Good compromise book.  You heard it here first.  Gonna get some six pack of cans of Diet Black Cherry Dr Browns from Super Market.  I love cans of soda!  I never get em because they're not cost-effective but what's gonna happen my Dad is gonna beat me?  Not gonna happen!  I'm gonna get away with this!  Gotta loaf of bread that expired 10/30.  In fridge they say it lasts 5-7 days extra.  I'm gonna push it to as much as 11 days extra.  I'M GONNA GET AWAY WITH THIS.  No one's gonna stop me from eating moldy bread I WIN AGAIN.  Look the point is I Really Will Get Away With This because it will probably be Fresh Enough.  I'm comfortable Rolling Them Dice!  What else is going on.  How come the first thing I always see is the Kurt Cobain book.  VERY RED.  Eye goes right to it.  Yep.  Also it's red because the cover is  like a mock-up of a Spiral Notebook Journal Cover.  Which happens to be Red.  Oh Okay.
     Eighth paragraph.  Spiral notebooks are the best.  I don't think I'm speaking out of turn when I say that.  Unless it was your turn to speak.  In which case Sorry, Go Ahead.  Hmm.  I feel like in my two years of Nursery School they combined both years at once.  There weren't separate groups for each individual year.  Gonna have to look into that.  No I don't.  And I can't!  I won't and I can't and I shan't!  Anyway.  Maybe shave again this Sunday.  I think I should.  Makes me feel like a big man.  For several reasons!  I'm a big man because I have growing facial hair.  I'm a big man because I'm responsible enough to shave said facial hair.  Well that's two reasons at least.  Oh.  Big Man because my De-odor-ant flavor is Everest.  Like the mountain!  Also I'm a big man because if I stand on my tippy-toes I'm half an inch taller!  ALRIGHT NOW WE'RE TALKIN'.
     Ninth paragraph!  Amazing.  Why do I have to say tippy-toes.  A Big Man wouldn't say tippy.  We just say TOES.  That's how WE BIG MEN do it.  Huh.  I've grown tired of all the flavors of gum I get.  But I don't think any other flavors would be any better!  I dunno what to do about this.  I don't think there's anything I can do.  Hmm.  I don't think most people from New York OR New Jersey would be happy about New Jersey being New York Jr.  But that's how I feel!  And I mean it in the most positive sense possible.  Well not THE MOST positive sense possible.  I mean it in a generally positive sense!  Sure.  What else.  Have I said anything worthwhile this entry.  Last thing I remember saying was Tired of Flavors Of Gum.  That's kind of relatable?  I'm sure one out of three people will read that and be like YEAH YA KNOW WHAT ME TOO.  THIS GUY IS SAYING WHAT I'M ALL THINKING.  Probably am overestimating the likelihood someone is gonna think that a bit.
     Last paragraph of the act.  Way more than One Out Of Three ME'S are thinking that.  A solid 80% Of Me is thinking the same thing re: Losing Satisfaction With Gum Flavors.  Huh.  I had a few Snapples later int he day over the week and I got TWO Patriotism Facts that said Frogs Never Drink Water.  What are the odds!  I dunno maybe 50% of the facts on bottle caps they distribute are the Frogs Never Drink Water one.  They REALLY wanna drive that point home.  The point is I don't like it!  I BELIEVE it.  But I don't like it!  And don't remind me again it'll just upset me!  Everything I Ever Needed To Know I Learnt From Snapple.  That's another book idea.  The truth is over 50% of the time I Don't Like what I'm learning from Snapple.  Somehow it bothers me one way or another!  Hmm.  Either something wrong with ME or something wrong with SNAPPLE.  Probably Snapple.  That'd be my first instinct.  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.
    

Great To See You

    Changed my mind, not gonna get those cans of soda.  They're not cost effective!  It's called MONEYBALL you wouldn't understand.  Anyway back from another walk.  Not gonna like sun going down before 5 PM in a few days!  Doesn't seem fair.  Can't take walks in the park when it's dark.  Too dark!  Can't find my way.  The point is I'll Survive but I'm not happy about it!  Not happy about surviving!  Part of me would rather die.  Not a big part.  Maybe 2% of me!  But it's still something!  Anyway what else is going on.  Still instinctively check the ESPN MLB page a dozen times a day.  Not sure what I expect to see there!  Not much new happens.  And anything new that happens isn't interesting to me!  Not sure why I started checking this web page several dozen times a day in the first place!  I don't particularly like baseball!
     Anyway.  Gotta Refresh SOMETHIN while sitting at computer.  This is as good as anything!  What else is going on.  What kind of great stuff can I do today after I'm done with the entry.  HMM.  That's a tough one!  Maybe watch some sort of Major Motion Picture on the TV.  That's what I aspire to do every day.  And sometimes I'm even successful at it!  Not a lot of Minor Motion Pictures.  I mean, I guess there are, but if you ask them they'd probably say nope we're Major too.  Not a lot of films that Identify as Minor Motion Pictures would be my guess.  What do I know I know NOTHING about the world of Relative Minor Motion Picture Production.  Anyway.  This motion picture is MAJOR.  That's how that phrase started.  What's wrong in the future where everything is Major is there something wrong with the Earth's gravitational pole.  That sort of thing.  Wait a second Gravitational Pole?  That's not a correct combination of words at all.  Also I cracked the code of what the real combination of words is, though!  Have you?  E-mail me your guesses at Email at something dot coom.
    Sure there's gravitational poles.  There's poles to the Earth and you gotta imagine they relate to the Earth's gravity somehow.  CHECK AND MATE.  What else is going on.  I wish I could get diet cream soda sometimes instead of diet root beer but Super Market doesn't sell it.  I feel like Cream Soda and Root Beer are brothers.  Not sure why exactly they go hand in hand but I'm guessing it's not just me who feels this way.  Also maybe not BROTHERS that's too close.  First cousins.  That's more accurate.  The point is delicious.  I guess.  Maybe other people don't think about soda as often as I Do.  Doesn't matter.  When they DO think about soda they think about Root Beer and Cream Soda being part of the same general premise.  The point is how often do I wear the same underwear and/r socks as the yesterday.  Often I'll just keep on what I wore to bed!  Probably have socks on 40% of the time I'm asleep and underwear on 80% of the time!  And then it's a 50/50 proposition whether I'll keep those on for the next day when I wake up.  Fascinating.
     Last paragraph before the last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I THINK about how I'm wearing the same underwear. But the thought is always look this underwear has done nothing wrong it's earned the right to go another day.  Shown it could handle itself well in action.  That sort of thing.  Guess I'll take a bath today.  Took a bath yesterday and it didn't go wrong at all.  Earned the right for a repeat bath today!  Hmm haven't had a Bath Mat in over a decade.  Is that okay.  I forget what bath mats are for.  Is it so you don't slip while taking a shower?  I don't slip anyway!  I'm great at standing without falling.  I do it all the time!  Maybe not as often as I'd like but still a good percent of the time.  Do fat people who wear shirts in public pools have to wear shirts in the shower?  No one else can see them but They'd Know How They Look.  Hmm.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Another entry Mostly Done.  Sounds good to me.  I feel like we should all wear clothes in the shower.  You don't wanna get TOO wet.  Could be unhealthy.  We're 80% water!  If we get too wet we might disintegrate into a puddle.  At some point the water overwhelms the solid is all I'm saying.  Also if we're 80% water, what percent of water is actually solid.  Gotta be Something.  Work with me water this has gotta go both ways.  What else is going on.  Not sure I'm happy about gaining an hour this weekend.  I got nothing productive to do with it.  Can't I just bank it and gain that hour some time later in the future when I'd know what to do with it?  Hmm.  Makes sense.  Also apparently there's the phrase Spring Ahead, Fall Back to remember which Daylight Savings Time Gain-or-Lose-an-Hour it is each time but I'll never remember that!  I get that other people can surely easily remember that.  Too late for me, though.  At this point in my life I have no room in my mind to start remembering that.  Hey great I'll be back in a little bit. 

Glad You Could Make It

    Hey!  Almost done with the entry.  Then I get to do whatever I want.  However there is nothing I want to do so I'll end up settling for doing the same stuff I do every day.   Hmm.  Gotta be something I wanna do if I really thought about it.  NOPE.  Not really!  I don't mind though.  Whatever the stuff I end up doing is is fine!  Wonderful.  Maybe doing drugs or something!  Drinking or smoking weed.  I don't really wanna do it right now but I can see how in life I could enjoy doing those things sometimes!  So I got that to look forward to.  OH HEY that's a fun thing to do.  Look Forward To Things!  Doesn't matter what it is.  You got something to look forward to Congratulations You Can Spend All Day Doing That.  What do I got to look forward to.  The CALENDAR YEAR ends in 2 months.  That means NOTHING tangibly but Hey It's Different Number Year Soon That'll Be Interesting.
     So that's good!  What else is going on.  De-odor-ant I got is DEGREE.  Great!  I'm familiar with that brand. Hmm something I've heard of?  Sounds good to me!  Anyway how many times am I supposed to roll this bar of deodorant under my arms.  Yesterday I think I rolled it back and forth four or five times for each under-arm.  Seemed reasonable.  Seems like I got some on it based on what I could smell without going over board.  There were no instructions on the thing, though!  There were some DO NOT DO THESE THINGS that I saw.  Didn't read them because I trust myself to know what not to do with it already!  Then again it couldn't hurt to just double check to make sure I'm not not not doing the right things.  Or wrong things.  Lost track when I was doing a triple negative.  I'm assuming one is don't eat it.  The general public can't be trusted not to eat this.  It smells delicious!  Hmm.
    Got snapple #2 going on.  Patriotism Fact II-- "Beavers were once the size of bears."  I feel like I knew that.  Kinda always imagined there were huge beavers out there at some point.  So anyway this fact made me happy because I believe it and I kinda knew it!  Also Bears Are The Size Of Once Beavers.  They could have phrased it that way.  They chose not to and I respect their decision. In fact I'd respect them less if they went with the way I just said.  Much less!  What else is going on.  Also got coffee #2 going on.  Drinking from my Bigger Cup today which I rarely do.  It was all that was clean.  And of course Bigger Cup Translates to more coffee!  I'm not gonna NOT fill up the cup just because it's bigger.  Just means that today I Have To/Get To Drink More Coffee!  Luck of the draw.
     Penultimate paragraph.  Let's see what the Eternals are up to on Rotten Tomatoes.  OH NO THEY'RE DOWN TO 52%.  They were at 57% just a day or two ago.  This is terrible news for Eternals.  Oh well what can ya do.  Make a better movie next time!  Use this as a Life Lesson.  Who the Hell is in charge of writing the Critic's Consensus on Rotten Tomatoes.  I feel like whoever it is is going a great job because I always feel like I get a lot out of that sentence or two.  But A LOT of that has got to be subjective from the guy writing the consensus.  Each critic review is totally unique!  You can't write a Consensus without putting your own spin on it HEAVILY.  But still I enjoy and trust these, "Consensuses," keep 'em coming.  What else is going on.  I gotta write but one more paragraph!  That's what's going on!
     Alright!  Gonna put de-odor-ant on SOON.  Let's say at the end of the entry.  Sure let's say that on account of it probably being accurate.  Makes sense.  Not sure who I'm trying to impress with de-odor-ant.  Myself!  I'll know what I smell like under arms and that's what counts in the end.  Possibly.  What's going on at ESPN MLB PAGE.  Nothing new.  Damnit!  I Refreshed for nothing!  I feel like that happens most of the time.  90% of my Refreshes are fruitless in terms of there being something new.  I guess that's life.  Why can't I be happy with the webpage BEFORE it being refreshed.  Give it some time to sink in!  I'll read the Update when it gets there Just Appreciate What's On The Page NOW.  Makes sense.  What else is going on.  HEY the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:25 P.M.

Wednesday, November 3, 2021 

That Was Easy

    Hi friends.  What's going on.  Lots of panic about Democrats doing poorly last night in Election Races.  I'm upset, too!  Lots of time to turn it around though for 2030.  What do you mean next elections are in only a year.  WE NEED NINE YEARS.  So there's that.  In the meantime though consider it a wake up call!  Now we know hmm maybe don't do the exact same stuff as we've been doing.  On the other hand that exact same stuff seems like fun let's do that.  This isn't a political blog though.  it's a nonsense blog!  Let's get into nonsense!  Have you heard the nonsense about politics?  YES SOME.  The point is I'm wearing a new shirt today and that's what counts!  I believe it advertises AC/DC somehow.  That's a good band.  I think one of the C's should have been a B so they'd have the first four letters of the alphabet down but I wouldn't know who to complain to.  Was listening to Current Rock 'N Roll playlist and they had a couple of songs from my youth Current Live Versions and I realized oh yeah I've been wasting so much time listening to adequate new music that I forgot all about the Really Great Music I Used To Like.  Oh Well What Can Ya Do.
    Not much!  Also the music I liked is too good!  Makes me feel bad about my own lack of quality re: Music & Other Things.  I don't need music Showing Me Up!  Maybe I do.  Gonna have to look into that.  The point is Day III into New Phase Of Diet and it's great.  I'm totally eating the same things but very slightly more!  Anyway.  I gotta look into what Critical Race Theory myself.  Sure we all have a good laugh at people who are voting because of it and can't say what it is.  But I can't either!  Off the top of my head (and probably theirs too) it's about RACE and it is CRITICAL of someone or something (White People?)  But it's probably something else.  Could be just Race Theory and it's CRITICAL we learn it!  Let's LTURQ.  Examines intersection of Race and U.S. Law and challenge traditional liberal approaches to racial justice.  Hmm.  I understand that.  As far as you know.
     Anyway.  Also they're teaching this to OUR KIDS in graduate level classes!  Presumably.  That'd be my guess.  Is Critical Race Theory being exploited as a wedge issue in politics now PART of Critical Race Theory?  My guess?  No not really But Nice Try.  Wow Whatta Guess.  The Braves won the World Series.  I'm guessing.  WHATTA GUESS.  And all I was basing it on was Being Absolutely Sure About It from having read it several times over the past hour and a half.  The point is Doesn't Seem Right.  29 Other Teams.  Why should the Braves get all the glory.  Looks like the Mets are looking at a Female Candidate for General Manager.  I like it!  She can be like the Lady Owner in Major League.  That worked out well for them.  They made the playoffs or something.  I don't have all the details.  Either way sure let's get a lady in there why not.  We'd have to employ Critical Gender Theory. Hmm could that be a thing.  Why not!  Based on me 50% understanding what Critical Race Theory, Critical Gender Theory could be a thing too!  Let's LTURQ.  Maybe it is maybe it isn't.  That's the gist I got from Google!
     What else is going on.  When Jesse Owens beat Hitler in the Olympics THAT was a Critical Race.  That's how we won World War II!  I don't have all the details in front of me.  Fourth paragraph.  Amazing!  Phone hasn't been staying charged long enough lately.  But I'm getting a new phone in a month or two anyway so let's not care.  Then again Jesse Owens winning the race might have been a catalyst that turned Hitler even more crazy.  Could have been an inflection point!  Either way Great.  How come people watch NASCAR and not track and field.  They wanna see car crashes.  So what in Track and Field you can have People Crashes.  Must happen all the time!  Track AND Field.  Pick one!  I personally think all you need is the track for People Racing.  What does A Field accomplish.  Other assorted related sporting events that aren't the People Racing.  Oh okay that makes sense.
     Yeah!  Wore winter jacket on Morning Walk.  Felt right the first half!  Felt a little warm the second half!  That's life I guess.  I have to PERSONALLY get a new phone.  No one's gonna do it for me.  Sure I'll do it later is my Main Feeling.  Also only feeling!  Maybe I'd like to have an INFLECTION POINT where a new feeling of I'm gonna do that now is born but I'm just not ready yet!  The good news is even if Democrats learn every lesson they can from This Election Season they'll still lose all over the place because they let voting rights go to putt.  So we got that going for us!  Hmm that sounds bad.  When I put it that way it sounds bad!  Also when you put it Any Other Way!  The point is We Must FORCE EVERYONE to Learn AND AGREE WITH Critical Race Theory is the lesson I learnt.  DOUBLE DOWN.  Also not just real Critical Race Theory.  You must be forced to accept WHATEVER YOU NEGATIVELY IMAGINE CRITICAL RACE THEORY IS.
     Also what you negatively imagine critical race theory is might Be Not Bad AT all.  You might imagine hey it's favorable and/or sympathetic towards black people I DON'T LIKE IT BECAUSE I DON'T LIKE THEM.  In which case I can't help you.  I can't help anyone.  Maybe I can help people on a person by person basis.  Depends on what kind of help they need.  I could make myself useful somehow one would imagine.  I'm a little worried the Republican will come out on top in New Jersey Governor.  That's RIGHT NEXT TO NEW YORK.  EWWWW We're Touching A Republican Governored State GROSS.  That sort of thing.  Also ANY state with a Republican government is gross.  Even if it's half the country away still too close for me!  What if it's THE ENTIRE country away.  Then that's decently far enough away Not Gross!  Huh good news for Republicans in Oregon.  Wait a second OREGON?  NO!  I LOVE OREGON.  LEAVE OREGON ALONE.
    What's going on again.  I lost track.  The point is there's a lot of time to turn things around for 2022 and I can't think of a better way to do it than Not Doing Anything Different And Doing The Same Thing Every Day.  Works for me!  Also what else is going on.  I think it was kind of rude for The Braves to beat The Astros in their own home ballpark.  How embarrassing for the Astros!  Totally humiliated in front of their fans that They Lost Baseball.  Oh well that's baseball for you.  One team gonna go away humiliated.  And half the time it will be the hometown team.  What else is going on.  At least they don't have to go very far.  They live there!  They can be humiliated Safely And Privately At Home sooner rather than later.  The point is the Democrat won for Mayor in NYC which is the city where I live.  YEAH!  I'm looking forward to him possibly being the same as the last mayor.
     Wonderful.  Gonna be an interesting primary race for New York State Governor Democrat Edition next year.  I hope someone I really like runs.  Hmm whose someone I really like.  Looking around my room to see any clues.  First thing I saw was book that was a collection of Kurt Cobain's diaries and private journaling.  Can't be him.  He's dead.  Also not sure he lives in New York.  What else is the next thing I see.  Clothes Hanger from Laundromat.  I guess the person at the laundromat could run for mayor.  She seems nice!  I'd have to hear her positions on things first though before committing my vote to her.  Anyway what else is going on.  When you're governor you have to spend half the time Away From The State in The Governor's Mansion.  Which I believe is considered International Waters.  Not sure what that accomplishes.
     Yeah!  The point is if the Democrats don't earn people's votes for 2022 by Doing Good Things For People what can ya do that's how things are I guess.  Also if the Democrats don't work to undo all the voting-rights-fucking-with for 2022 then what can ya do that's how things are I guess.  It's up to them!  What else is going on.  Also if I write the rest of the entry applying no effort and settling for a Generous C- then what can ya do that's how things are I guess.  DAMNIT I HATE THINGS BEING HOW THEY ARE I GUESS.  Things SUCK and I Guess Them As Such!  Huh?  Oh Okay.  What else is going on.  I don't know if what's going on these days with Climate Change is good or not!  Some of it sounds ambitious but I don't know if it's good enough!  And I don't know if it's just words or the start and/or continuation of more concrete things!  It's the most important issue to me and I have no way of knowing whether I should be relatively pleased or not!  DAMNIT.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  The point is WOW Joe Biden will be president for THREE more years.  Probably!  Imagine all he could Not Accomplish Much At All in those years with a Republican House and Senate.  Wonderful.  What else is going on.  Gotta continue listening to mediocre new music I feel.  It's EASIER to enjoy because IT'S NOT AS GOOD.  Yep that makes a lot of sense.  The point is I can accomplish a lot over the next year.  Why there's only Doing The Same Thing I've Been Doing.  NO WE CAN'T DO THAT.  GOTTA DO NEW AND BETTER STUFF.  That sounds hard and/or impossible.  Hmm.  I can get a new phone.  That's #1.  Current phone will stop working after New Years or something because it's not 5 or 6G enough.  Then new phone will be better for phone calls.  Then I can make more productive phone calls.  Better phone calls will in turn lead me to the next point of progress!  Hmm.  I'll be back in a little bit.

This Is Different

    What's going on friends.  Here to write a few more paragraphs.  Got root beer going.  I get 2 bottles a week!  HAVEN'T HAD ANY THIS WEEK UNTIL JUST NOW.  I hope that doesn't upset you.  It upset me!  I have to drink a lot in the next two days before re-upping with super market.  No I Don't.  Feels like I do though!  So the point is let's move on with our lives.  OH NO there's an article on Mets Blog/Official Website saying ADD THIS NEW GUY AS A POSSIBLE CANDIDATE FOR GM Search.  And the guy LOOKS LIKE AN ASSHOLE.  Wearing sunglasses.  I don't like it.  Who does he think he is.  I don't want him in my Franchise Organization and I'm putting my foot down!  Already kinda down!  Actually right now I'm sitting cross legged.  But it's closer to down than it is up, that's all I'm gonna say! 
    Wonderful.  Look we can't judge a man by the glasses he wears to protect his eyeballs from the sun.  We have to judge him by the Contents Of His Eyeballs' Character.  Anyway.  Also this guy is standing in front of a podium with a microphone in the picture.  What a jerk.  Yean we all just CAN'T WAIT to hear what you have to say.  We're on the edge of our seats.  REGALE US WITH YOUR PROCLAMATION KING JERKHEAD.  Not even a GM yet.  Just some sort of assistant with some other organization.  He's the guy who gets the coffee and sandwiches for the Real GMs!  Hmm now I kinda like the guy.  Could he get me a sandwich?  I'd like a sandwich.  Anyway.  What else is going on.  I can get MY OWN sandwich.  The sandwich you get yourself tastes All The Sweeter.  I don't wanna a sweet sandwich.  Unless it's BBQ.  BBQ sauce can be sweet.  Especially Honey BBQ.  Let's talk about it.  OH We Just Did.
     Amazing.  Look with my luck this guy is gonna become the Mets GM and now he's gonna think poorly of me because of This Act and we won't get along and that's the end of my influence in the Mets Franchise Organization General Manager Department.  DAMNIT why must I antagonize everyone I Find To Look Like A Jerk?  What else is going on.  Just took another look at the picture.  He could be a good guy.  I dunno.  I'll reserve my final judgment until I see several more pictures.  Also this guy is ANOTHER GM candidate who goes by Billy!  I already told you I thought that was a dumb official name for a grown man.  Apparently he didn't get the Memo!  If he's not getting THESE memos I'm a little concerned he's not gonna get memos from other GMS re: Trade Proposals.  Anyway.  What else is going on.  Hmm.  Figure I haven't said much at all this act and/or entry and/or My Life.  Hey that's life I guess.  APPARENTLY.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  THE ETERNALS will take our mind off of Crumbling Democratic Party.  Gotta take our mind off of something.  ...I dunno about Crumbling.  Maybe Stumbling is better.  Bumbling is pretty good.  Tumbling?  No not so much Tumbling.  What else is going on.  Mumbling?  Sure why not.  The point is we're pretty close to finishing this act and that's something we can all be happy about.  HEY THIS BILLY GUY WAS GM FOR ANGELS.  The baseball team.  Not Actual Angels.  So the point is he's got that going for him.  Someone was getting HIM the sandwiches.  A little concerned he's gonna Eat All The Sandwiches In New York Then.  This guy is spoiled re: Getting all the sandwiches he wants!  Won't leave any for the rest of us!  I lost track of the point I was trying to make.  I'm not sure I try to make points.  Maybe once in a while.  Probably made a point sometime this past July or so.
     Last paragraph of the act.  I guess.  LOOK I tried to play Rocksmith for 30 minutes yesterday and I got as far as 4 minutes.  And I was just not very good at it!  And I gave up!  Sounds about right.  Maybe I'll be better at Call Of Duty II I might try that tonight.  STOP PRESSURING ME re: Playing Video Games.  What's it to you anyhow.  I think you just enjoy Me Having To Do Things Because Of You.  You don't care what those things are you just get off on your power trip!  DAMN YOU.  What else is going on.  What else do I have to do because of you.  Nothing for now.  Mostly just 30 minutes of video games at night related stuff.  That's not so bad.  Especially because it isn't even really enforced.  I'll know if I'm not doing my video game call of duty so to speak but I'd get away with it is the point.  Anyway.  Gonna take a bath now!

Now It's Personal

    Wonderful.  Time to write five more paragraphs.  Today has got a lot going for it.  Without giving too much away, I WILL have a Lunch AND a Dinner which will be to my liking.  I will have... uh... Well That's About It BUT NOT BAD.  Today is national sandwich day according to twitter.  Could easily be a lie.  No one is gonna fact check that.  Also who cares.  Could just be sponsored by Subway.  Not a real national holiday.  A fake one made by The Fast Food Industry I Hate It So Much.  Except for when I eat their food without caring about calories at that point in my life.  Then DELICIOUS.  I'm more on board than you will ever know In Those Scenarios.  I feel like the main sticking point of Fast Food isn't that it's Fast, but that it's cheap.  Yes for some people they like that it's fast and easy.  But across the world possibly a plurality of their customers aren't like I NEED FOOD IN A HURRY but rather I NEED FOOD I CAN AFFORD.  Let's talk about it.  We just did.  Oh okay.
     What else is going on.  FAST FOOD?  That's an oxymoron if I ever heard one.  Can't have any food on a fast!  Must have said that six times before.  Sounds like the kind of thing I'd say maybe twice a year.  Also LOOK I'm sure there are religious traditions all over the world throughout time where there's a premise of Fasting but they do let you have certain food.  Is that a real fast though?  Who am I to say!  Anyway.  I know why it's called Fast Food it's because It Goes Right Through You heeeyyyyyy.  Sounds like a joke dumb people had made before.  Also the premise may or may not be true.  Maybe Fast Food goes right through you and maybe it doesn't!  Kinda SEEMS like it might!  I don't have all the details in front of me.  I may have made THAT joke maybe ONCE a year.  Half as much as the other joke.  Also it's a joke I always go into Not Liking and Not Trusting The Premise.  STILL THOUGH IT MUST BE MADE.  MANY TIMES.  OVER AND OVER AGAIN.
     Hey I got coffee going.  Amazing.  Coffee is delicious but it usually brings about some writers block for a while.  I get too into drinking the delicious coffee that I lose track of what's important-- writing the dumbest stuff possible as fast as possible.  Like Fast Food but Words.  Also very cheap!  Practically free!  Practically Entirely Free And Not Even Practically.  Anyway.  Just had a strange thought if this website had a Combination Meal Value Menu which burgers would I like.  I don't know what that means beyond thinking it for half a second.  The point is I gotta write some more sentences AND QUICK.  Gonna take a nice break between entry and walk.  Should I watch the new episode of Child's Play The TV Series or should I save that for later?  I dunno!  Anyway HEY I liked voting yesterday.  I dunno if they're making the ballots easier or if I'm just getting used to them but it went very smoothly.  Was a JOY to fill out them bubbles.  I'm gonna wanna do this next time again for sure! 
    Gotta sticker.  Already pasted it on my hard acoustic guitar case with the rest of my stickers.  Amazing!  Also when they gave me a ballot I had a choice of languages-- Chinese Or Korean.  And I was like Is ENGLISH AN OPTION?  Apparently both have English.  But you could choose English AND Chinese or English AND Korean.  They gave me Korean.  I was happy with that.  Probably would have been my first choice if they pressed me.  Also I got to keep the pen they gave me to fill out the ballot with.  Man they must be HEMORRHAGING pens.  But good news for the rest of us!  One Pen Richer than I was before voting!  Anyway.  SNAPPLE Patriotism Fact Of The Day--  The Hawaiian alphabet has only 12 letters.  Good!  Sounds great to me.  I wish my alphabet had only 12 letters.  It'd be easier to remember!
     What else is going on.  That fact made me happy.  I wanna learn more about the Hawaiian Alphabet but without having to LTURQ.  Maybe Ill LTURQ Later.  Could happen!  Anything's possible!  Look am I gonna go out of my way to have a sandwich today?  No.  I'm not A CHUMP.  No Subway The Restaurant Sponsored "Sandwich Day Promotion," is gonna trick ME into having a special sandwich.  In fact I was CONSIDERING getting Subway tonight but now that's off the table!  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Just about done with the entry.  Not 100% happy there were signs for supporting candidates right outside Polling Place entry.  Seems like that should be illegal.  And/or Is Illegal.  Also a little concerned about them letting me keep the pen.  You can't give people things for voting!  Sure PERSONALLY I love a new pen but it's a general principle I'm not sure I'm comfortable with!  The point is the entry is over.

-12:46 P.M. 

Tuesday, November 2, 2021 

I Gotta Write Better Titles

    What's up friends.  Time to write another entry.  Figure I'll write Introductions for several paragraphs and then get into some Observations.  SO HELLO!!!  Ugh.  Wearing a nice shirt.  When this shirt first entered my rotation a year or two ago (from where I don't know!) I was like this is a dumb shirt but over time I grew to appreciate it!  YES part of it was it was too small on me when I was heavier but the main part was LOOKS DUMB.  Striped shirt.  Thin horizontal stripes.  Brown and black.  See it just SOUNDS dumb doesn't it?  But it's not!  I enjoy it now.  Hmm looks like we skipped the introductions and got right into The Observations!  I'm OBSERVING the shirt I'm wearing and sharing my observations with the people out there in the internet!  LOOK maybe part of the reason I like it now is because hey used to be small now it ain't I'm Coming Out On Top In This Scenario.  Or maybe the horizontal lines hypnotized me over the course of a year and a half into liking them.  That sounds reasonable.
    Damn shirts always getting the better of us Mentally!  Had other flavor Pop Tart for breakfast today.  Frosted Strawberry!  Gonna be honest tasted 98% the same as Brown Sugar Cinnamon.  Delicious!  The point is what else is going on.  Major League Baseball World Series continues tonight!  I dunno why I felt compelled to, "Go There."  I have nothing to say about this.  I've talked about Major League Baseball Playoffs every day for the past month and I haven't said something new about it since maybe the 2nd day of the playoffs.  And That New Thing was Dumb To Start With.  The point is Baseball Is Dumb To Start With??  Gonna have to look into that.  I think if they wanna make baseball more interesting with more hits and whatnot you should make a rule that Pitchers Have To Pitch Badly.  Just blanket rule that however good you are you're only allowed to pitch at 90% of your highest possible quality.  Easy! 
     Also make hitters hit at 110% of their highest possible quality.  Even EASIER.  I dunno.  I'd like to play Rocksmith but I don't have the time!  I'm not at home for more than 45 minutes at a time because of Walks.  I can't get into it in such a short period of time!  Sure I can.  But I don't WANT to.  Interesting counterpoint.  What really drives the point home with how little time I spend Relaxing In House is that I can put on a movie after the entry is done and it's still not finished by the nighttime.  WOW.  Sounds like a long movie.  YEAH IT IS but still.  HEY I get to vote today.  My dad voted through the mail and I asked him if there were any propositions I should know about.  He said yeah!  He couldn't find out which to vote for.  He just voted for whichever ones sounded progressive.  Could have been A RUSE.  They make the bad ones sound good FOR TRICKS.  Either way sure I'll do the same thing let's roll the dice.
     Amazing.  All I can say is I better get a sticker out of this.  That's not All I Can Say.  That's one of many things I can say.  No one's gonna stop me from saying Pretty Much Anything I want.  The point is I woke up in the middle of the night and had some cereal and I dropped a piece on the floor and couldn't find it and went to sleep and then just now I FOUND IT.  No crumbs laying around MY floor.  No ants gonna wanna come into my room if they know what's good for them.  Being alive is good for them.  I'll KILL THEM if they come around.  I will! I know it sounds harsh but I think that's pretty standard!  It's not cruel because they're MUCH smaller than we are.  Did you know baby ants are called Kittens.  I hope not.  It's inaccurate.  If you Knew That I think you've got problems.  Probably talked about how I Like This Shirt Now before.  But I like it EVEN BETTER than before.  Couldn't have talked about that yet.  It's Brand New To Today!
    Huh.  Coffee after this paragraph.  HEY The Eternals is coming out this weekend.  Maybe I should go see it.  I won't.  But maybe I should.  I could calculate the odds that I Should Or Should Not with it being a foregone conclusion I won't.  FINE I'll get started on that later.  Could take a while.  What else is going on.  My guess is it gets a 73% Fresh on Rotten Tomatoes.  You heard it here first!  Hmm could definitely be more.  I don't think it'll be under 57%, though.  Let's say 57% and up is my prediction.  What the Hell am I talking about.  Hmm.  I could always see The Eternals On My Walks.  I'd have to buy many tickets over the course of several days so it works out properly.  See 10 minutes here and there.  Nah the transportation back and forth would take too long.  If theater was 2 blocks away FINE I can watch 20 minutes each, "walk," and no one would be the wiser.  But it's not so I can't!
   Hey great just great.  I hope The Avengers show up in The Eternals.  I like The Avengers.  Kind of.  I'm Positive-Neutral on The Avengers!  I think they spend too much time fighting with one another and not enough time on Pizza Parties though.  Hmm I'd have a pizza party.  Not a bad idea for dinner tonight.  Dunno what would make it A Party.  Making my parents have pizza too.  And before we take out first bites we Clink each other's slices like we would champagne glasses.  Okay that sounds like a pizza party.  Good.  Look ideally no one wants to be on a pizza party with their parents.  But desperate times call for desperate measures!  Not sure about that.  Desperate times still call for Well Thought Out And Considered Measured.  In fact they call for considered measures MORE THAN EVER.  Huh.
     Seventh paragraph!  The point is what walk should I vote with.  My guess is walk #5.  Amazing.  I'm a little concerned the Mets will have no one to represent them at Winter Meetings.  When General Managers get together to have pizza parties presumably.  The Mets have no general manager or equivalent position!  Maybe just send Francisco Lindor to take notes.  Doesn't have to engage much but just get an overall sense of what's going on and report back to Mets Headquarters.  The point is Winter Meetings sounds like fun.  I wish I could go to Winter Meetings.  Hmm.  Is that a thing I can do.  Spend 10 year training to become a Baseball General Manager.  Sure why not if I put my mind to it I could achieve anything.  Not sure about that.  I'm gonna have to look into that!  Sure sounds like a lie.
      Eighth paragraph!  Amazing.  Also I don't like baseball that much.  That's why I'm PERFECT for the job.  My judgment won't be clouded by Liking What I Do.  Hmm.  Not a lot worthwhile in this entry so far.  That's why I'm PERFECT for the job!  Anyway.  Who came up with Voting On Tuesdays.  And am I in favor of it or not.  Hmm.  I think voting should be National Holiday but either way it's gotta be on SOME day of the week.  Why not Tuesday.  I'm sure they put some thought into it.  But it could be NEGATIVE thought.  They might have calculated least amount of people would want to vote on Tuesday.  I don't trust them to be making these decisions with good intentions in mind!  I don't trust them at all!  Trust who.  The TUESDAY PEOPLE that's who!  I don't even have the Rocksmith CDROM in the Xbox.  So if I wanna play it there's THAT WHOLE HASSLE too.  Ugh.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Way ahead of schedule today.  I like that!  I get a nice break between Entry and Next Walk which I've grown accustomed to enjoying.  Just makes my day slightly better!  Based on the last 2 or 3 days.  WOW WHAT A STREAK.  Today is Day II of new diet.  WOW WHAT A STREAK.  My Dad is taking my Mom to get glasses in a minute.  Good for them.  I wish them all the success in the world.  Assuming they give some of their extra success to me.  They surely don't need all of it.  Hmm what should I spend the next ten years Training For.  General Manager for Sports Team is one possibility we've ruled out.  What else can we rule out.  Pizza Pie Maker.  I'd keep eating the pizzas I was making!  No good!  Hmm.  Also I wouldn't wanna deal with Really Hot Ovens.  What if I burn myself accidentally.  What if I burn myself ON PURPOSE.
    Yeah!  Seems weird we vote for judges.  Isn't the premise of a judge that they're entirely apolitical and just there to enforce law?  I mean I get in reality that's unenforceable.  But we shouldn't ADMIT it's a political position and vote for them on party lines.  YEAH.  GOOD POINT.  Then again I want Democratic judges where I live SO GIMME A VOTE.  YEAH.  GOOD POINT.  Is it possible I can combine my votes for Democratic Judges into one vote for one SUPER Democratic Judge?  My guess?  No of course not.  Would it be illegal for the voting people to give me more than one sticker.  I feel like that could get one of us in jail.  But is it worth the risk?  My guess?  No of course not.  Wonderful.  What if I make A PACT with myself to play Rocksmith.  Start small.  Thirty minutes today.  I can do that.  FINE THEN IT'S SETTLED.  A PACT WITH MYSELF HAS BEEN FORMED.  I'll be back in a little bit.     

Is This A Good Example

    I've said nothing entertaining AND I've said the same non-entertaining things as before.  Oh well that's life.  Not always entertaining!  And often The Same Thing As Before!  Good.  My parents are out of the house now.  Presumably getting glasses for my Mom and/or my Dad.  Or possibly camping out in front of Movie Theater for The Eternals to arrive.  That can't be very productive if they're just coming back home a half hour later.  They got a taste of what Camping Out For Movies is all about and maybe that's all they wanted?  I don't know what my parents want.  That's their business.  The point is I made a pact to play Video Game for 30 minutes today and I'm gonna do it!  I dunno which 30 minutes.  That's for the courts to decide!  By a politically appointed judge!  Hope he's a Democrat.  If he's a Republican he's bound to mess up this decision.  How bad could he mess this up.  So I have to play the video game a 30 minutes time that's not ideal.  Not a huge deal.  Yes but it's PART OF A PATTERN of bad decisions!
    Oh okay well when you put it that way.  Huh.  Dad said some judges were running on both the Democratic and Republican Ticket.  Not sure what that accomplishes!  But my Dad didn't vote for them.  NOT GOOD ENOUGH.  I'm with him.  Oh I Know What It Accomplishes.  Makes sure This Guy Becomes A Judge.  Good for them I guess everything is working out in their favor.  What else is going on.  I don't like feeding Voting Ballot into machine.  I know they say put it in any way any direction it'll register! but no way am I buying that.  This machine is a lot dumber than they say it is and I'm pretty sure my ballot won't be processed.  Oh well I tried that's what counts.  Also where I can get Vote Counting Machine.  What if I want to hold an election.  Has anyone ever thought of that?  Probably not.  If they have I gotta wonder what the Hell is going on in their mind in general.
     Third paragraph of the act.  This entry isn't great but MAYBE JUST MAYBE that's a sign the rest of the day will be better.  There must be balance in my day!  Gotta go through crap if you wanna get to the good stuff.  That's my impression.  That's a lyric I had in high school!  I believe in the law of averages/I go through crap to reap the benefits.  Not sure what it means in retrospect.  Pretty sure I never knew what it means!  But it does slant rhyme and that's all that counts in the end re: song lyrics.  I think I like slant rhymes more than proper rhymes.  True story!  More fun.  More engaging.  More creative and original sounding!  Get off my back about it is the point.  I wonder if there's any Halloween Themed Content on Rocksmith.  My guess is Yes Much.  What else is going on.  Not sure if I still believe in the law of averages.  Also what's the REAL law of averages.  Averages exist sometimes off the top of my head.  LMLTURQ.  HEY this pretty much IS the real law of averages.
    Turns out I knew what The Laws Of Averages Were in high school!  GENIUS!  And then I forgot at some point!  DUMBHEAD!  Is there any way I can vote for them to speed up getting Recreational Marijuana Dispenceraries going in New York?  I know they're apparently gradually working on it but I'd like to put in a good word for Them Getting It Done Now.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Dad said there were Five Propositions that could be one.  OR Maybe one of the judges running as a Democrat and a Republican is ACTUALLY a vote for Get Recreational Dispenceraries going IMMEDIATELY.  Makes sense.  Hmm then my Dad has already voted against that.  GREAT NOW IT WON'T PASS.  Thanks a lot Dad.  I mean that IRONICALLY.  I'm Not Thankful at all It's The Opposite!  Anyway what else is going on.  POOR ENTRY so far.  Man oh man is the rest of the day gonna be The Tops!
     Last paragraph of the act.  Yeah!  I feel like if I ever get recreational marijuana there's a 50% chance my Mom will want to try it with me.  And there's an 90% chance I may or may not be better doing it alone the first time jus to test it out.  90% I may or may not?  What's the other 10%?  THAT there is the question!  If we can figure out what that other 10% is we just might unlock the riddle to our existence!  Huh.  Just saw on twitter AOC says to vote Yes on all 5 Propositions.  ALRIGHT!  Now I don't need to Read Them And Think.  I was anticipating Having To Briefly Think On The Spot!  WHEW.  Now I may never have to think again after this entry.  Why wait for that?  I CAN STOP THINKING RIGHT NOW.  Uhh..  Hmm...  Huh.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Maybe take a shower right now.  Mix things up.  HEY I got the de-odor-ant in the mail a couple of days ago!  Then forgot about it!  Now I remember it and can open it and use it!  Yep that's sure how that sequence of events played out.  HEY I'll be back in a little bit.
 

My Guess Is Probably Not

    Hey!  What's going on and crap.  Took a shower successfully.  Still home alone!  So I got that going for me.  Now I have to write some crappy paragraphs.  So I got that going against me.  Haven't had any Halloween Candy yet.  We got 2 bags of the Assorteds I Told You About.  My mom finished one bag already Except For The Twix.  Look I was just Talking A Big Game when I said I'd like to eat the Twix.  I'd prefer it over the other ones but now that it comes down to it I don't want a Twix.  I can think of better ways to live my life than eating Twixeses.  The point is my Mom eats a lot of candy but she doesn't eat that much real food so in the end it's actually HEALTHIER for her.  I see her eating half toasted bagels all the time.  Stuff like that.  Good for her is the point she's living life on HER terms.
    Cool!  I haven't had a bagel in a while.  Kind of want a bagel!  Kind of don't wanna STAND AROUND waiting for it to be toasted and then Do Hard Work spreading butter and/or cream cheese.  Not to mention the worst part of all Having To Cut It In Half.  I don't have time for this I got things to do presumably!  What if I just ate a bagel. Whole bagel.  NO cutting in half, no toasting it, no adding things.  That's how I ate bagels when I was a kid.  Just GET INTO IT.  I could see myself getting a blast and a half out of that.  Something to consider.  Maybe half of one for a breakfast.  Delicious AND Reasonable Breakfast.  Hmm.  I wonder what will happen in the handful of meaningful competitive races across the country today!  I'm rooting for The DEMOCRATS.  Unless they're both Democrats & Republicans.  In which case I'm Rooting for The Potential Marijuana Dispenciaries.  You know that sort of thing.  Here come coffee. 
     Yeah!  What else is going on.  Long break coming up between Entry and Walk.  Probably could vote during that break.  Make a special trip instead of combining it with walk.  Nah I ain't gonna do that.  There's Television Set Programs I can be watching.  Possibly Internet Programs I can RE-ROUTE through my Television Set!  Let's see what Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day is.  Cows do not have upper front teeth.  Great.  What do I care.  I couldn't give a fig about cows and their teeth or not.  As long as we can eat their precious precious eggs for breakfast than who cares about the rest.  This way they'll have trouble chewing through the eggs they lay.  So that's good for us I guess.  Wonderful.  I'm glad this is all working out for us (The Humans).  Also is it safe to assume cows have LOWER front teeth and Upper BACK teeth?  My guess?  Sure I can assume what I want whose gonna stop me.
     Penultimate paragraph.  So close to the end!  And we've established the rest of the day Has To Be Good because this entry was Quite Poor!  Hmm I should be writing Quite Poor entries more often!  By which I mean going into it aiming for Quite Poor.  Instead of it just coming about through the natural course of things.  As it does!  What else is going on.  Might not work.  Only works if it happens organically.  You can't FORCE a law of averages it just doesn't work that way.  The point is I feel like this entry sucked organically.  So I got that going for me for today at least.  Looked up if they had a Critics Consensus on Rotten Tomatoes for The Eternals yet.  They do.  Know what the score was?  57% Recommended!  That's the number I said was the lowest possible.  And I was right!  Sort of!  More or less right!  It was one of two numbers I said!  Right!
     Last paragraph of the day.  Now all we have to do is make sure nobody else reviews this movie so the number can remain my second guess in perpetuity.  Okay let's do it!  Amazing.  Parents came back from Eyeglass Place.  Just so you know.  They are safe and sound.  Here at home.  HEY I haven't Read Book in a while.  I think last book I read was Carrie Brownenstein of The Sleater----Kinney halfway.  I gotta continue that book!  See if she makes it to the end Alive.  Just to be certain.  Is Alive the movie about the people in the plane crash who ate the other people in the plane crash?  Yep.  Anyway that title is really looking at it as a Glass Is Half Full type deal.  Because you could equally have called it Dead And Eaten.  LOOK I don't know how many people survived versus how many people were eaten.  Maybe it wasn't 50/50 exactly.  It doesn't matter that much!  HEY the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:07 P.M.

Monday, November 1, 2021 

You Wouldn't Wanna Read This

    Hi friends!  Here to start November off right.  Oh No.  I was hoping I could just Start It Off any way that came naturally.  Now that I'm committed to doing it right that's a whole lot of pressure!  And so far I'VE FAILED.  The point is I'm a little ahead of schedule today so I can really take my time doing things.  Really stretch things out.  What exactly am I doing with this bonus time.  I dunno ZONING OUT?  HEY I checked my weight today!  Was aiming/hoping for a 6 pound loss over the month and I lost 4.5!  Considering I might have built a pound or two of muscle from the many many sit ups and push ups I did Not So Bad!  The point is started new diet off right!  Pop Tart for breakfast.  Room Temperature!  Delicious!  I dunno what temperature this room was at.  I'd say mid 60's to mid 70's.  I really have no idea.  Pop tart might have been a few degrees warmer.  I don't know how Breakfast Pastries Work re: Standard Temperature.  The point is I'll like the way I look by the end of the year but I might not like my Mathematical Weight for another month or so.
    ALRIGHT STARTED IT OFF WRONG.  But now I can Start It Off Right Starting NOW.  Hmm.  Had four trick or treaters yesterday!  A group of 4.  Two kids and two I Wanna Say 13 Year Olds escorting them.  They took candy too!  I'm okay with that.  They were providing a public service escorting these kids.  I'm assuming they know the kids.  They didn't just latch onto these kids and were like PLAY ALONG SO WE CAN GET CANDY TOO.  OR ELSE!!!  The point is Great.  Saw lots of trick or treaters out and about on my walk.  Just not on my block!  GOOD who needs 'em.  I DO.  I felt like a good person giving out candy and being like Okay Have A Good Time!  I'm a nice man to children and/or young teenage escorts.  Wait that doesn't sound right.  I'm not a nice man to young teenage escorts the way you're thinking.  YOU FILTHY PERVERT.
     What else is going on.  I guess I'd be a nice man to young teenage escorts.  I'd be nice by NOT utilizing their escorting services.  I'd treat them with respect and concern.  Are you sure you wanna do this?  That sort of thing.  Okay if you say so carry on!  That's them saying they're sure.  Hmm.  The point is I didn't' register what the kids were wearing but the teenagers were wearing surgical masks.  The kids were WAY DOWN BELOW ME.  It never occurred to be to Look Down so I can be like oh hey they're in that costume.  Anyway.  I rarely have to look down in life because Very Little is below me BUT when I take walks I feel like I'm always looking down.  For RESPECT.  If I walk by a person I don't wanna look at him eye level that's a sign of CHALLENGING them.  If I keep my head down they know I hope for no confrontation.  Hmm.  When I have heat on in house during Cold Season it's roughly 75 degrees.  I feel like when I have cold on in house during Heat Season it's 68 or 69.  Therefore Kitchen Right Now is Somewhere Around There.
     Hmm.  I feel like it's up to Cold Season now.  I've been using Heat System last few weeks on and off!  Amazing.  Used a pillow case recently.  Somehow a spare pillowcase got thrown in with my recent batch of laundry and then it was handed to me several days later all clean and folded.  I don't care about pillowcases.  I'll use a naked pillow no problem.  BUT I put it over one of my non-cased pillows anyway because that's just the kind of guy I am.  Wait a second.  I just said it's the opposite of the kind of guy I am.  NO.  I'm the kind of guy who wouldn't' do it GENERALLY.  But since my Mom went through the trouble of cleaning it and presenting it to be nicely I WILL utilize it as a sign of RESPECT.  That I'm not CHALLENGING her into a CONFRONTATION.  Hmm.  I think I had a dream I was playing Rocksmith.  Maybe it's a sign I should play Rocksmith.  That's one interesting interpretation.
     Yeah!  I saw they were playing a Woody Allen movie on a premium channel yesterday I can only assume for Halloween.  Any other day I'd be angry and upset they're playing it but on Halloween it makes sense because Woody Allen is scary now.  Spooked me Right Good knowing they were endorsing and encouraging the watching of his film.  Hmm.  Gotta few things to watch on The Television Set today.  Amazing!  No Woody Allen.  I feel like I've seen 30% of all Woody Allen Movies and 70% of his most famous successful movies.  I DON'T LIKE THOSE ESTIMATIONS.  They strongly imply that Woody Allen movies are in multiples of ten or so.  Which may be the case but really what are the odds.  For a second I was about to be like ok let's see if I can calculate the odds.  Then I realized This Is Nonsense.  There's No Calculating These Odds.  Anyway I ain't watching a Woody Allen movie if I wanted to see a monster I'd watch... uh... the movie MONSTER... starring some lady I forget.  Never saw the movie.
     HEY I got coffee going on.  Also I had a second snapple last night but I forget the fact.  I remember thinking yeah that kinda makes sense though.  It was believable is the point.  OH HEY turn the page of Patriotism Calendar.  Maybe in a paragraph or two.  Lemme get into enjoying this coffee first.  Okay.  Gotta imagine there's some very specific generation of kids who grew up The Year They Couldn't Trick Or Treat.  That's the main thing they'll remember of this time period.  That and Woody Allen being exposed explicitly for being the monster he is.  It was known before but society as a whole didn't quite register it completely yet.  Also what else is going on.  I dunno how fast you gain muscle but I have been doing way too many push ups and sit ups.  So it's POSSIBLE I gained a pound or a pound and a half.  AMAZING.  Also for half the day yesterday My Heart Hurt.  That's the price you pay when you exercise!  Heart starts to hurt!  Great news though BACK TO NORMAL.
     Amazing.  I think it's cause I do sit ups and push ups Too Much With My Left Side.  I dunno why.  I try to do it in the middle but I just naturally put more pressure on my left side.  Where my heart is!  SO that's why heart hurt and not the opposite side of my chest.  The No Heart Area.  Anyway seventh paragraph!  WOW A Return TO Salem's Lot is on HBOMAX?!!  I don't even know what happened THE FIRST TIME In Salem's Lot.  I wanna say Vampires.  And I imagine returning to Salem's Lot would bring about Even More Vampires.  YEP VAMPIRES JUST CHECKED THE INTERNET.  Amazing.  Vampires are a snooze to me.  I like some monsters better than others and I don't like vampires!  Who cares.  Drink blood and go about at night live in coffins see if I care.  Doesn't concern me at all!  Why do they have to sleep in coffins.  They can sleep anywhere they want.  I guess coffins can be comfy.  Probably lined with comfortable sheets I guess.  Great now I Wanna sleep in a coffin.  Oh well that's life.  I can sleep in a coffin when I'm dead.  YEAH!  I probably will!  So I got that to look forward to.
     Eighth paragraph.  Amazing.  Let's turn the page on Patriotism Calendar.  The phrase is, "Undimmed by human tears!"  Not sure what that means.  A picture of some sort of monument.  Says names of states.  I see Missouri in the foreground and I can make out Alabama nearby.  Have no clue what this is.  Also there are flowers in the picture???  This picture and quote have raised more questions than they've answered.  Oh well that's life let's forget about it and move on.  Now THAT'S Life.  Let's forget about it and move on.  Sounds good to me!  Forgetting about it is good and moving on is even better!  I get to vote tomorrow. I feel like voting is complicated even for me.  I'm a relatively smart guy but this bubbling in and whatnot and the way the pages are set up and you gotta feed it into the machine It's All Too Much!  I guess that's what they want.  I could see them wanting other people's voting to be difficult sure that makes sense but MY Voting At Least should be easy!  That's how I feel.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Looks like there's going to be more baseball games this post season!  AT least one!  Possibly two!  I'm rooting for two.  The more games the more fun people have.  And I think people should have good clean wholesome fun.  Like Major League Baseball!  I feel like it'd be cool to be into Minor League Baseball.  Live in some place where you have a Minor League Baseball Team.  Be into that.  I might just be thinking of The Simpsons.  It'd be cool to be The Simpsons.  They seem to be having a blast and a half all the time.  Half of the time at least.  And sometimes a blast and all.  Huh.  How long is latest episode of Curb Your Enthusiasm.  I want to know how enraged I should be.  36 minutes.  SOMEWHAT Enraged.  Hmm.  Kinda presumptuous of Larry David to think we'd have any enthusiasm about him back in the year 2000.  Turned out he was right that ONE DAY we would.  Maybe industry types would be enthusiastic.  Because He Was Half Of Seinfeld and Seinfeld Made Much Money.  But the LAYPERSON didn't know him from Adam!  Also LAYPERSON let's talk about why that's a word.  Nah let's do something else.  That Checks Out Too!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Not sure I like calling Curb Your Enthusiasm Curb for short.  Maybe we should be calling it Enthusiasm!  Maybe Your.  Let's call it Your.  "How many minutes is the new episode of Your I wanna see how enraged I should be," would be a Common Phrase heard in this scenario.  What else is going on.  This entry ain't great.  It's something though!  Barely.  I'LL TAKE IT.  Barely something!  You said it first And I Accept.  The point is I expected Zero trick or treaters and we got Four and I don't know how to represent in Percentages how much more there were compared to my guess.  If I guessed one it'd be 400%.  With zero the only thing I can think of is Infinity.  Oh well that's life.  Let the kids pick out their own candy.  Not a great system!  I had four or five different kinds of candy and they can't stand there going through it for any more than 4 seconds.  They gotta go with first instincts.  They see something they like they grab it.  No time to really think about it!  Great I'll be back in a little bit.

What's The Big Idea

    Hi!  What's going on and crap.  So far the entry is a solid NOT GOOD.  No mater grading things from A-F!  Now things are either GOOD or NOT GOOD.  And I'm expecting A Lot Of Not Goods!  Gotta be honest!  Anyway what else is going on.  Wow do I feel satisfied from having a big single pop tart breakfast.  Also the flavor was great.  I'd do it again tomorrow if I had the opportunity.  I'm not gonna believe this but I DO HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY.  Why can't tomorrow be right now.  I don't wanna have to wait!  This hardly seems fair.  Anyway this might help me fall asleep better.  Knowing I got a better breakfast when I wake up.  I already fall asleep just fine.  Asleep 20 minutes after I start trying to sleep.  Pretty good rate all things considered!  The point is now I wanna do the next thing which leads to the next thing which leads to the next 20 things which leads to WAKING UP AND EATING A POP TART.  Keep the line moving of Things To Do!  There's pop tarts in it for me as long as I stay alive!
     Wonderful.  Look am I gonna lose enthusiasm about these pop tarts possibly as soon as tomorrow?   NO.  I SAY IT'LL LAST UNTIL THURSDAY.  Get out of here with that tomorrow crap!  Anyway what else is going on.  I may have given up on talking about lunch and dinner but boy oh boy do I make up for it talking about breakfast.  But it's RELEVANT because IT ALREADY HAPPENED.  Makes sense.  Daylight Spendings Time this weekend.  I can't wait to see which of my clocks know it and which clocks don't.  I feel like maybe Coffee Clock won't know it.  And/or Microwave Clock.  Not sure what to do about that.  I guess just wait six months.  Makes sense.  Also when a clock doesn't know it's Daylight Savings Time when most other clocks do? KIND OF lose some respect for the dumb clock.  Makes me think less of it!  Don't guilt trip me about being a jerk about that!  It's the clock's own fault.
     Huh.  What else is going on.  Getting close to halfway through the act!  No Coffee Reward this act, though.  Probably no snapple either.  Just gotta get through it without any help.  My guess is we're losing an hour this week.  Just seems like when it rains it pours.  And the first week of November is Raining Metaphorically.  Lets LTURQ.  HEY WE GAIN AN HOUR.  AMAZING.  Wait is that a good thing.  Kinda assumed Anything Extra Is Good.  Now I'm worried this hour is gonna be a chore.  Dumb hour we'd be much better off without it is possibly my thinking now.  Hmm.  I guess it's on all of us individually to decide if we see and/or make the hour half Full or half Sucky.  I'm gonna go with Half Sucky.  Sounds easier.  Also half sucky means half full too!  I don't care which Half it leans towards I'd take a general-close-to 50/50 for this extra hour.  MAKES SENSE.  MAKES TOO MUCH SENSE.
     Penultimate paragraph.  Of the act!  I hope I don't feel pressure to eat slightly less than my new phase of diet is so I could lose weight a little quicker.  The whole point of New Phase Of Diet is to loosen up a bit!  It's hard at first though.  My instinct is to Still Be Tightened Up.  This is terrible how do you go from Tightened Up to Loosened Up when Tightened Up is slightly Healthier and muchly Your Already Routine.  JUST BITE THE BULLET.  And by that I mean a bullet of salami.  Bite into it and eat half the bullet at once.  That'll get ya going!  Bullets of salami are a thing people know right.  Look it up if you don't believe me on it being a thing!  Is Salami mostly a Jewish thing.  Do Christians eat Salami.  I feel like it might be utilized in Italian food.  Christians Are Italians Sometimes.  Anyway maybe only for Jews does salami come in bullets.  Look I have very little details on this other than one may or may not snack on huge pieces of salami in the shape of giant bullets.
     Amazing!  I feel like Christians eat thin salami and Jewish People eat thicker slices.  Makes sense.  The point is I forget.  I kind of remember but I don't care anymore.  Look pillows don't need pillowcases.  What does it add?  Nothing!  If anything it takes away.  Pillow was designed for softness and comfort.  Pillowcases were designed for aesthetic reasons.  Make the pillow look nice!  Pillow is thus more comfortable than a pillow plus pillowcase scenario.  Also I don't have sheets on my bed how do you like that?  Not proud of that.  Not saying its better.  I'm just saying IT IS.  Hmm must be some bed sheets around here somewhere.  I could easily Sheet My Bed if I felt like it.  Kinda feel like it!  Maybe I'll look into that later today for sure.  Anyway in the meantime that's it for Act II.  Be back in a little bit!
    

This Can End At Any Moment

    Probably five paragraphs from now.  In the meantime though let's write those five paragraphs.  Not sure if I'm ever gonna eat a piece of Halloween Candy.  Now that I mention it I probably will/should eat 2-4 pieces over the next week.  Probably a TWIX at least one of the times.  Best option I got!  M and/or M's are fine tasting but one isn't enough to satisfy your Mouth Cravings and having multiple ones seems unhealthily guzzling down candy.  What the Hell do you do with an M N M.  Don't eat 'em Eat A Twix.  Yep that checks out.  I remember when I was a kid they had a big Promotional Item M n M MINIS.  Might have been made for only a year or two.  Either way I can't even imagine in retrospect how small they must have been.  And WHY they were at all.  I bought em though!  I remember they came in a nice cylindric canister package.  Delicious.  Coffee time!  Delicious! 
     Hey today is one of the days they're pretending to care about climate change!  PROGRESS.  Ten years ago they only half pretended to care about climate change.  At this rate sometime after the climate has changed way too much more than it already has they'll half admit that the climate has changed a little bit at that point!  In the meantime though what else is going on.  I think I should listen to my dream and learn guitar through playing video games.  It's a good Next Thing To Do.  Diet has been loosened theoretically.  Need something else to be productive.  Playing a video game can be that thing!  Then again pretty hard.  Have you ever tried playing Blitzkrieg Bop?  After playing that fast for 80 seconds it gets hard!  And I don't see how practicing would change anything!  Practicing would be a pointless exercise which just repeatedly proves I can't get any better even incrementally so why even bother trying!
     Sounds about right.  Snapple Patriotism Fact Of The Day-- "Mexican jumping beans jump to get out of the sunlight."  I guess I believe that.  I don't know what Mexican Jumping Beans are and they sound made up to begin with BUT I still believe they exist so by extension I'd believe anything you tell me about them!  The good news is I am getting relatively very close to being done with this entry.  Maybe I can write some Worthwhile in the last two and a half paragraphs.  Hmm.  How do we know Mexican Jumping Beans are really Mexican.  And when we get down to it What REALLY IS, "MEXICO."  Let's get into it.  Huh.  Haven't had a delicious breath mint in a day or two.  Huh.  OH NOW I REMEMBER THE LAST SNAPPLE PATRIOTISM FACT FROM YESTERDAY.  Something along the lines of There Are Over 30 Varieties Of Mint.  I liked that fact because it made me think boy I'd like to try ALL those varieties.  Amazing.
     Penultimate paragraph.  WHAT PROVIDENCE that I thought of not having a breath mint RIGHT AFTER Snapple Patriotism Fact which then related to Other Patriotism Snapple Fact!  Sometimes the universe works out.  Usually it doesn't!  But sometimes it does!  Those times it does are the exceptions that prove the rule that it usually doesn't!  Oh well that's life.  I could see myself cutting in half what my cutting in half diet would have been.  So really just cutting diet in a fourth or maybe a third.  Hmm.  Given myself a lot to think about.  TOO MUCH almost.  Wait no not too much.  Just one thing.  I could think about Just One Thing all day if I had to!  Easy!  Anyway the point is I already forgot what I was supposed to think about.  Fractions of how different my diet could be compared to before.  That's EXACTLY what I was supposed to think about.  I gave myself too little credit re: Remembering It!
     Last paragraph of the day!  LOOK my Mom got mid-shelf Dove Chocolate Candy which I'd rather have than Twix if I was gonna have candy.  Sometimes she's got Milk Chocolate.  Sometimes she's got Dark Chocolate.  Either way it's delicious!  What if I had to choose.  Hmm ya know what right now I'd go with Dark Chocolate.  I feel like people wanna go with dark chocolate because the ywanna appear to be connoisseurs.  Yeah let the MASSES have their Milk Chocolate I HAVE A MORE REFINED PALATE I'm Gonna Go With The Dark.  And/or they just prefer the taste of dark chocolate.  Either way what else is going on.  Gonna take a nice big break between Entry and Next Walk.  Gotta imagine I'll get something out of that.  Not sure what.  The point is the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:13 P.M.

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