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Tuesday, September 21, 2021

Maybe I Could Try Harder

    Hello friends.  Here to write some more pharagraphs.  That's great news!  I was worried I was Dead and couldn't do anything ever again.  Not sure where I got that impression.  Not even sure I did get that impression!  I could easily be lying!  The point is I woke up today to a house all by myself.  Dad took Mom to Eye Doctor Check Up!  Good news!  She can see Great Just Great now!  Way more great than before.  Also FINALLY I get some time to myself.  I've been waiting to masturbate in the kitchen FOR YEARS.  I guess.  Hmm.  Last time I masturbated in the house not in my room or bathroom.  GO.  When I was very young I had masturbated in Den watching TV while everyone was asleep.  We're talkin' 20 years ago.  Dunno if I've Broke That Record at any point in the last two decades, though.  Seems like kind of  a big oversight.  Especially because kitchen really gets me off.
     Anyway.
  Drank enough water over the last two days that I MAY DEFINITELY make this soda last all this week!  I just need to drink A LITTLE BIT MORE water over the next three days.  Hardly any!  Easy!  What else.  Been taking 7 walks a day the last half a week or more.  Possibly as much as 2/3rds of a week!  Either way it's wonderful.  Now's not the time In Diet to slow down now's the time to speed up!  I'm reaching a second wind or something!  I don't know what winds mean but they sound like a positive thing re: when you're running for a while.  Oh I get it it helps you run.  You're running and it's hard.  But then there's WIND going in your direction and you can keep moving with hardly any effort.  Wind is blowing you along by itself.  Sounds amazing to me.  Sounds better than amazing.  Sounds great!  Great isn't better than amazing.  Depends on the circumstance!  Sure why not. 
     What else.  Canada held their elections.  No spoilers but the guy I had heard of won.  That's a pretty big spoiler.  Oh well serves you right for putting off Knowing Who Won Canada Elections for too long.  What did you expect?!  Anyway.  Elections?  IN SEPTEMBER?  Now I've heard of everything!  That's not true. Even with this, I've heard of VERY FEW things.  Of all things in the world, I'm lucky if I've heard of 5% of them.  Let's talk about it!  And that's the way I like it.  Most things are none of my business!  Keep me out of it.  I live close to Canada.  This is my business!  I believe Niagara Falls starts in Canada on the high part and then after the waterfall that's where America starts.  I don't actually believe that but I do believe that SHOULD be accurate.  Sounds fun to me.  Waterfall.  I can't get enough of waterfalls!  Why do we need a word for water fall.  How often is that gonna come up.  It just came up JUST NOW.  Yeah but nobody cares.
     Fourth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Tomorrow is the first day of Fall.  The month!  Not the second part of the word Waterfall!  Either way amazing.  Gotta imagine I'll start wearing Sweatshirt Jacket within the next couple of weeks for walks.  AMAZING.  IT HAS POCKETS.  I dunno about that.  Putting hands in pockets is FUN but then I'm burning less calories.  Instead of shuffling my arms back and forth they are now STATIONARY.  SO there's ups and downs to everything.  Except for plateaus.  Let's talk about it.  Also with jacket I get to put hood up over my head.  That'll show people I mean business!  Also if it rains now we're really talkin!  My head ain't gonna be getting wet AT ALL.  Maybe A LITTLE BIT.  But SIGNIFANTLY LESS.  That sort of thing.  Anyway.  For some reason I don't wear glasses when I take my walk.  Oh wait I know why.  I was taking a walk in the evening back when I first started taking walks this year and I had glasses on and I was looking at the lights of traffic lights and whatnot and they appeared blurry and confusing.  Something with the lenses made it weird.  I DON'T NEED WEIRD LIGHTS DISTRACTING ME.  I GOT PLACES TO BE.
     Cool.
  Gonna pour some coffee after this paragraph.  Roughly a cupsworth.  I guess.  I don't know what a cup is.  Wait yes I do.  Moving on!  What if there were hoods that you could wear that aren't attached to jackets.  You mean HATS?  No I mean hoods you idiot.  It's a hood!  Not a hat!  How would it stay on.  That's for THEM to figure out.  Either way I'm full of great ideas.  Like that one!  And presumably one day I'll come up with a second and third one!  What about a jacket without a hood.  What's the point in that?  That makes no sense.  What the Hell, that's the dumbest thing I've ever heard in my life.  Which is KIND OF accurate.  What I just said IS one of the dumbest things I've ever heard in my life.  Just not in the way I meant it!  There I go again!  Whatever. 
    Let's say ONE worthwhile thing.  This paragraph.  Albright.  Let's do it.  Maybe later.  I'm not giving up completely on writing a worthwhile thing.  I'm just saying NOT RIGHT THIS VERY MOMENT.  What else is going on.  I got coffee.  I got snapple.  That's all I got going on for me.  That and I'm 5 paragraphs into the entry.  That's not bad!  I mean, the paragraphs are bad.  But the idea of me only having to write 3 more of what I already did is pretty good!  Because I like being done with doing stuff!  That sort of thing!  Ugh.  I feel like I'd be playing Rocksmith twice as much if it didn't take a solid 45 seconds to load.  From the time I turn on console to the time I reach main menu-- roughly 45 seconds.  I GOT THINGS TO DO I CAN'T WASTE TIME HERE.  What if I just leave it on all the time when I'm not using it.  THAT'S A WASTE OF ENERGY.  ELECTRICAL ENERGY.  And I don't play that game!  Maybe I do sometimes!  It's a fun game!
     Wow.  Also Xbox 360 emits a HUM I believe.  I can't live my life with a hum going on.  I don't play that game!  Hmm maybe that's why I'm bad at this game.  Can't focus on playing the right guitar notes because of that HUM going on distracting me.  Hmm.  Am I POSITIVE that the hum isn't just part of the songs.  And that all the songs on the game HAPPEN to have the exact same hum in the background of them?  No that's not possible.  The hum comes from the console itself not the TV Speakers.  Oh okay.  For a while I thought that might be the explanation.  Now I realize it can't be.  OR COULD IT.  No it can't be.  OH OKAY.  What else is going on.  HMM.  HUM.  I don't play the HUM game but I play the HMM game All The Time!  One of my favorite games!  What else is going on.  Lots of stuff.  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.
     Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it!  I think The Mets are dumb because if they had just won 3 or 5 more games this season that they actually lost they'd be in the thick of playoff contention.  How hard is that?  Pretty hard.  Oh Okay.  What else is going on.  I was watching a The Twilight Zone episode yesterday where the guy wanted to go back in time to prevent certain atrocities or catastrophes or whatever and one of them was I MUST STOP PRESIDENT GARFIELD FROM BEING ASSASSINATED.  Look I barely knew there was a President Garfield.  And even less than that did I know he was assassinated.  The point is I think there's better ways to spend your time than on President Garfield.  Also am I exaggerating his determination to save Garfield?  A little bit!  I'm fudging the plot a little bit but it's, I dunno, 80% accurate.  If only people in President Garfield's time had the same indifference to him as I do.  Then no one would want to kill him.  Who cares!  Not Us!
     Ninth paragraph.  I guess.  Gotta write the next two paragraphs in 13 minutes.  I made arrangements with My Dad Re: when we will be taking walks.  And he needs me to hurry this up for some reason I don't fully understand.  I guess he has some place to go later on in the day.  Sounds about right.  I remember him saying something about that earlier.  I forget what.  Probably That.  What he said wasn't About What He Said but rather What He Said.  That makes no sense to anyone.  I get it a little bit but there's no way anyone else can make sense of that.  That's probably a recurring theme of this website!  I happened to be reading a paragraph yesterday from yesterday's entry and I came upon a few sentences that I was like I don't remember what this means!  And without knowing it because I wrote it there's no way I can know it from an outside perspective because there's no logic to these sentences.  So there's that.
     Last paragraph of the act!   Wonderful.  I guess.  Finishing up coffee #1.  That's great.  I like the taste of it and presumably I like the kick it gives me.  I can't say for sure I get a kick out of it but that's the assumption I've been operating under.  What else is going on.  Gonna go to Endocrinologist in a week and a half or so.  Get some endocrine stuff checked out.  Probably.  Gotta figure they'll do something while I'm there to justify the excursion.  Might as well check out my endocrine!  Anyway.  Maybe I can get Flu Shot!  Is it too early for Flu Shot.  I'll get a Flu Shot if I can sure why not.  All things being equal I like getting shots.  Even if all things aren't equal I like getting shots.  ESPECIALLY if they're unequal in the direction of Me Liking Getting... Shots?  I lost track of what I was saying.  That's life I guess.  I'll be back later!

 

 

 

I've Had Just About Enough Of You

    Maybe the easiest way to try hard is to write worse but quicker.  The quicker I write the MORE I can write in the same amount of time.  And writing quicker takes some extra effort!  And the final product might be worse but it's MORE.  That's accomplishing something.  Anyway.  I feel like if I had to guess, most of what could be gotten out of reading this website is being like HEY I CAN FOLLOW THIS LOGIC A SOLID 85% OF THE TIME!!!  It's not funny or interesting or anything but maybe you get a real kick out of being able to understand me at least as well as I understand myself.  Uh oh.  You probably understand me MORE than I understand myself! I'm scared now.  Then again if you e-mail me Who I Am that might be something I'm interested in!  VERY interested.  What else is going on.  Write four more paragraphs.  Cleansing Process.  Write five more paragraphs.  Walk.  RECALIBRATION TIME.  Amazing.
     Cool!  Another day without explicitly telling you my meals and another day where I'm gonna get a nice PRIVATE kick out of my meals!  Presumably.  I haven't had them yet but that's been my experience the last half of a week or so.  Man these entries just keep getting worse and worse.  At least before you were finding out what I was eating for lunch and/or dinner.  Now you don't even get that!  What exactly is keeping you here.  Pot committed at this point one would imagine.  Anyway.  Dad is going to Dentist today.  That's why he had to fit in walk a little earlier than usual.  I feel like I went to the dentist a few months ago.  Hmm.  Maybe I gotta go through all past entries to see whether I did or did not.  I must have mentioned it on website!  Well that would take several months.  Unless I search for the word DENTIST.  But what if I mention the activity but don't use the word DENTIST.  Maybe I just use the word DENTISTRY.  Then searching DENTIST would get me nowhere!
     What else is going on.  I dunno.  It's hard to believe it's only been four days since I first had New Coke Zero.  It's also hard to believe I only have to wait another three days before I get to have New New Coke Zeroes.  Hard to believe but FUN.  I get a real kick out of that belief.  Makes me feel good inside!  What else is going on.  I dunno.  I wonder if I can get a pack of six 2 liter Coke Zeroes for a very slightly discounted price.  I can do that with diet pepsis!  I don't know how much I save but if I had to guess it's gotta be roughly 15 cents less as opposed to getting six bottles separately.  Hmm better LTURQ.  HEY with Coke Zero it's an EIGHT PACK.  NOW WE'RE TALKING.  I WOULD HAVE WANTED MORE THAN SIX ANYWAY AND JUST BEEN RESIGNED TO SETTLE.  This is the best news I've had all day specifically in the last 15 seconds.  Also, let's face it-- All Day.
    
Oh well such is life.  Anyway can Twilight Zone Man stop Garfield from being assassinated?  I dunno!  You'll have to see the episode for yourself!  Also if Garfield The Cat was assassinated would a plurality of people be like GOOD I'M GLAD?  I feel like it would be close, yeah!  Anyway. What does Garfield sound like.  And DON'T SAY BILL MURRAY.  I can't picture his non-Bill Murray voice at all! Also yes I know Bill Murray played him at one point, but I never saw that either so I don't imagine that anyway, but even if I did, that doesn't count!  I don't know what Garfield actually sounds like.  In real life.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine there were thousands of people who found out they were making a Garfield movie who were REALLY excited about it.  Gotta imagine roughly 10,000 people were OVERJOYED.  That's People for ya.
    
Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Do Garfield fans have cats and are they resentful that their cats never talk to them?  My guess?  I dunno sure maybe.  What else is going on.  I usually take my pants off after getting back from second walk and writing second act.  Because I'm gonna take a bath or shower after the second act of entry!  Might as well get taking my pants off out of the way.  That's one less thing I'm gonna have to do later!  Why put off until later today what I can do 20 minutes ago.  Hmm.  Sure I still wear whatever kind of underwear I have on.  Gotta keep things respectable!  One would imagine.  Ugh.  Coke Zero 8 pack saves 92 cents than if you were getting 8 separate bottles for individual rate.  Diet Pepsi 6 pack saves... Wait A Second... it's $4.58 MORE?!?!  That can't be right.  Lemme double check that.  I think it's accurate!  Man oh man have I been getting scammed.  Oh well that's life.  I'll be back later.

 

 

 

Oh No They're Getting Away

    Hello friends.  Here we are near the end of the entry.  Another day down more or less.  I'm going with LESS.  Anyway.  I feel like my Dad would be interested in this Soda Scam but it might INFURIATE HIM.  And he'd BEAT ME.  So maybe just keep it to myself and change my soda buying habits on my own.  That sounds like fun.  Anyway.  I've been scammed out of hundreds of dollars over the last year!  And by hundreds of dollars I mean more than one hundred dollars!  Fascinating.  I feel like I have to get the message out there that FreshDirect.com is doing a Soda Scam.  Imagine how many other people might be effected!  Maybe almost as much of people that are excited about Garfield!  Well let's not push it.  Anyway.  Anyway I JUST SAID IT ON WEBSITE.  I am getting the message out there!  Now each of you tell three people and we'll Pay It Forward all the way to the bank!  What bank.  I dunno.  I was hoping you knew!
     Coffee!  Amazing.  What else is going on.  More The Sampsons today.  If I had to guess?  Between two and six episodes.  Including two and six.  Sounds GREAT JUST GREAT.  Also LOOKS FINE TOO.  The voice actors get a lot of credit but I get a kick out of these designs of people.  Look at Seymour Skinner!  Just look at him!  WHAT A JERK!  I dunno about that.  How many Simpsons characters have initials of the same letter.  Seymour Skinner.  Lisa Simpson.  Wait a second scratch that.  Anyway I lost interest in this even before I was done typing the first sentence of it.  What else is going on.  You could easily argue I never had interest in it.  You'd probably win that argument.  Not just because it's accurate but because I'm guessing you have pretty good arguing skills.  You'd win any argument you participate in, regardless of accuracy!  Hmm I'm giving you a lot of credit based on nothing.  Oh well enjoy!
     Penpenultimate paragraph.  I guess.  Better make the most of this Diet Pepsi I have left over for the rest of the week.  After this it's Coke Zeroes!  So anything I wanna get out of pepsi NOW'S THE TIME.  Jeez.  HMM now would be a good time to kick it into overdrive and write two and a half paragraphs BADLY but QUICKLY.  I don't know if I have it in me, though!  If I did I probably would have already settled for doing that before explicitly suggesting it to myself.  The good news is what else is going on.  I may even watch a The Sampsons before my next walk.  Why is that a, "May Even."  I dunno.  I may not do it.  And it would be kind of surprising and/or out character TO DO it.  I can't explain further but just take my word for it.  Anyway.  How's my goal of Getting Deodorant going.  So far no progress!  Gotta imagine that'll pick up soon. Wonderful.
    
Anyway.  Between Coke Zero and Sprite Zero I'm LEANING HEAVILY into the Coca Cola Corporation Brand Carbonated Beverages.  Hey whatever gets the job done!  Sprite is Coke, right?  Better LTURQ.  Them using the same Zero premise is a dead giveaway.  Google IS SPRITE COKE.  Yes Sprite Is Coke.  We settled that once and for all and I think we're all better people because of it.  Also for other reasons.  We're all better people than other people, let's be honest.  Well done.  What else is going on.  I haven't put pants back on after bath yet.  I take em off in advance of bath.  Then I leave 'em off after bath for the same amount of time after the fact!  This is good stuff lets keep it going.  I'm not supposed to take walks while My Dad is taking a walk but I think I'm allowed to take walks while My Dad is at the dentist.  Go figure.
    
Last paragraph of the day AND PERHAPS EVER.  Let's get it over with!  Amazing.  I find it odd when I see spiders for the first time and they already got some sort of web going.  How has this been going on under my nose without me knowing it!  Then again I don't know how long it takes to start a web.  I was always kind of picturing weeks.  Maybe DAYS at the least.  Maybe they can start a respectable web within hours, though.  No way of knowing!  Is there anyway we can farm spiders to make webs for us and then once we've gotten the webs we want we get rid of the spiders?  I dunno!  First I'd have to think hard about what we'd want webs for.  I'm sure we can figure something out!  YEAH I GET that spider webs are good to catch other insects so we don't have to deal with them.  But WITHOUT SPIDERS they'll escape the web after several hours.  You get trapped in a web, you're a sitting duck for spider!  But if there's no spider you'll EVENTUALLY struggle out of the web, right?  That's what I would do!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:14 P.M.

 

 

 

Monday, September 20, 2021

What Do You Think This Is

    Hello friends.  I'm back!  I saw that coming a mile away.  Maybe you did too.  That's your business!  Not mine!  Kind of my business!  Maybe I want to go out of my way to either verify or disprove what you think you see coming a single mile away.  I don't care that much but some people might!  Anyway checked my weight and I'm down another 1.5 pounds in the last 9 days.  AMAZING.  At this rate I WILL CONTINUE LOSING MORE POUNDS AT A RATE I HAVE NO WAY OF DETERMINING.  So I got that going on for me.  Drank my fair share of water yesterday!  Not all the water I'd have to drink over the week to ration soda, but a respectable amount nonetheless.  Ya know what?  Water isn't bad!  For some reason I was imagining drinking water would be a chore.  But let's talk about it-- if you're thirsty-- water gets the job done!  Why should we talk about it.  Nothing more to say.  I guess.  Hey the movie The Water Boy.  Remember that?!  All boys are made out of 80% water.  That's how boys work.  And how water works.  Also Water Works. 
     Ugh.  Was watching my uncle play High Stakes Poker Tournament last night on my computer.  Got really unlucky at the end to lose!  Great!  I went through the whole thing wishing I could be playing poker and then I realized at the end oh well if you get really unlucky when it counts at the end then Not Playing It Is Worth It In The End.  So I got that going for me.  Also I felt shittily for him for 30 seconds!  Then I realized OH RIGHT THAT ISN'T ME and I slept like a baby.  Also I GOT something out of it.  I don't wanna play more poker!  I benefited from the experience so basically everything is working out for me great.  I wonder if there's any weird kind of poker where it's the same rules as regular texas hold em but whichever hand is in the lead at the time you flip the cards over WINS.  I could see that being fun.  And confusing!  Mostly confusing.  Partly fun.  Lotta confusing!
     How about poker where you share cards with all your opponents to WORK TOGETHER to make the best hand possible.  That way everyone wins and/or loses.  But you're in it AS A TEAM is the point.  Good Interpersonal Coworking Skills developed.  Anyway.  Lost 35 pounds in Oh I Don't Know half a year.  Gotta lost another 15 pounds in Oh I Don't Know however long it takes me Presumably A Quarter Of A Year.  AMAZING.  I can't wait to find out if my body looks weird or normal at ideal weight.  Do I have some weird saggy skin and/or fat deposits or not.  And if so WHERE.  And HOW BAD.  I feel like I got a good shot at Not Having Weird Remnants Of Overweightness.  It's gonna come down to the wire!  What wire.  Why are things coming down to the wire!  I don't know what that means!  Better LTURQ.  Horse racing.  They used to Hang A Wire at the end of race to determine who won.  Amazing.
    
Great now I'm endorsing Horse Racing.  That's not the kind of thing I wanna encourage!  Unless the horses decide to work together and do a relay race so they can get as far as possible so they can carry the torch presumably hundreds of miles possibly.  Depends on how many horses!  And how many hundreds of miles!  Ughh.  Carry the torch.  I assume that's An Olympics Reference.  No way of knowing though.  Such is life!  They should have enough events in Olympics where Everyone In The World has to/gets to compete in something.  And obviously they come up with events where any random person HAS to be in something he's relatively competitive in.  Hmm.  What event would I be good in.  Connect Four off the top of my head. ...Might need to practice a bit, I'm a bit rusty.  But I could see that.
     Hmm I haven't played connect four in a while!  What a great game.  Maybe connect FIVE.  Maybe connect four but you work together to make a pretty picture.  Sounds fun.  Some people play connect four to make four, some people play connect four to stop the other person from connecting four.  You gotta ask yourself what kind of person are you.  I dunno.  Tic Tac Toe.  I feel like I sometimes played that in High School during class with person in front of me.  Passing back the paper.  Gotta imagine people in Stuyvesant should be playing more complex games than Tic Tac Toe with each other.  Oh well.  It's safe to assume we were two of the, "Dumber," people in the school!  That's life I guess.  Being dumber than people.  Sounds about right.  Whatever.  I diet every day, but the day or two before I know I'll check my weight I go the extra mile!  How horrible.
    
Coffee time.  How horrible.  Wait a second no.  I like coffee!  It makes me happy.  Hmm poker would be annoying pointless lose-money-with disrupt my daily schedule hard-to-cash out but THEN AGAIN HOW EXCITING.  Maybe I should play it!  I won't though.  Not today!  Not ever!  Maybe one day!  Probably not today though!  I'm putting my foot down.  Wonder where that phrase comes from.  Some guy putting his feet down when he's had it up to here with things.  Better LTURQ.  It just means Stomping Your Feet to get someone's attention.  Because you're like I've had it up to here with this, I NEED ATTENTION, STOMP!  What a strange world we live in.  I dunno if I've ever stomped my feet for attention.  I've done lots of other stuff for attention!  Dunno about stomping.  Also let's face it your foot was ALREADY down.  You're just reiterating your foot being down.  Well maybe you were reclining.  I don't know how you live your life. 
    Jeez.  The Mets still have a .3-.4% chance of making playoffs!  GET OUT OF THE WAY HERE COME THEM METS.  Can someone calculate their odds of making 2022 playoffs as of now?  Gotta be SOME kind of very inexact generalized odds you can calculate.  Oh well.  I feel like The Mets should somehow ruin the playoffs for everyone.  If they can't be in it why should anyone?  I don't know exactly what they could do but I'm sure they could think of something.  Anyway.  When there are teams in August and September that have no chance of making playoffs, Commentators are calling them spoilers.  Boy this team would like a chance to SPOIL the odds for this other team they're playing by beating them.  And then they cycle through the other teams.  Let's say the spoiler team wins each series!  THEY'VE SPOILED NOTHING.  EVERYONE IS BACK TO WHERE THEY WERE BEFORE FACING YOU.  Congratulations YOU'VE ACHIEVED ABSOLUTELY NOTHING.  Makes my blood boil!
    
Seventh pharagraph?  Maybe eighth?  Boy oh boy would Eighth be exciting.  IT'S EIGHTH HOW EXCITING.  I think I'm gonna keep that spelled, "pharagraph."  Sounds fun to me!  Anyway.  Also even if you just look at it as One Series Spoiler Isolated.  You spoil THEIR OPPONENT'S chance by losing to them.  You lose to a team in contention, you're making it harder for the team IN PLAYOFF SPOT COMPETITION with the team you just lost to.  WELL DONE YOU'RE THROWING GUM IN THE WORKS.  Huh.  I remember when The Mets were 5 games over .500 in May or June and I was just like well this is great.  All the need to do is break even for the rest of the season and they could make the playoffs!  JUST DON'T LOSE MORE THAN THEY WIN.  Which it turns out was easier said than done!  VERY easily said.  I had no problems at all saying it!  Presumably I said it here at some point.  I wouldn't have said it anywhere else!  Hmm.
    
Ninth paragraph!  I'd like to read AN ARTICLE where they quickly go through all 30 MLB Sports Teams and detail the main injuries they've suffered this year.  Because if Mets had no injuries they'd probably be a playoff team!  BUT maybe each other team had key injuries too.  So if we're discounting injuries we'd have to discount them for every team.  Now the ball is in YOUR court.  Gotta imagine that phrase comes from a King in Middle Ages who would pass the time by throwing a handball against the wall.  In his court.  Kind of like The Shining!  Anyway gotta imagine Kings are bored as fuck.  In movies and whatnot they're always just sitting around and every now and then someone shows up and he talks to them.  But mostly just sitting around!  In their throne presumably.  Great.
    
Last pharagraph of the act.  Wonderful.  I could work Poker around Walking.  Just play it in short bursts instead of long slogs.  Then again I'm better off with out.  THEN AGAIN ON THE FIRST HAND... no!  It's not happening.  Maybe play some freerolls.  But that's as far as I go!  And even that is too far!  Also who cares what else is going on.  The Act just flew by.  I owe it all to not thinking about what I'm writing.  It hasn't let me down yet!  I feel like I've written a lot in my life and not thinking about what I'm writing has served me well for the most part.  At least in terms of effort expended.  If I was thinking that'd be twice or THREE TIMES as much effort and who needs to put all that effort into something.  Not me!  Not on one!  Maybe some people!  Not me!  Amazing.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

You're Actually Pretty Close

    How long would it take a World Class Chess Master to figure out 100% how to play Connect Four.  Not just general strategies but literally 100% of possible ways the game can go and how to win and/or force a draw.  Half a day?  As much as week?  My guess is probably a good working day.  Eight to ten hours.  I envy them.  Maybe it takes an entire week if they're fine tuning TRAPPING skills and whatnot.  Making DECOY plays to get the opponent to trip up.  The point is they could figure out Connect Four 100% in no more than a week!  That's how I feel.  Anyway I got some water.  How long would it take a World Class Chess Master to figure out 100% when to drink water and went to drink Soda Pop.  Trick question HE ALREADY KNOWS ALWAYS BE DRINKING SODA POP.  Gotta imagine at Grandmaster Chess Games they're serving free alcoholic beverages to loosen inhibitions to make the game go faster.  As soon as one grandmaster chess game is over they can start a new one.  Keep things moving!
     Anyway.  What else is going on. I got some water myself just like I said.  What kind of stuff have I been watching on The Television lately.  Who CARES.  Let's GET THINGS GOING.  Can't wait until Constitution Day next year.  We didn't celebrate it this year because we missed it but I feel like looking forward to next year and preparing and making sure we do it right next time is a worthwhile thing.  Take this loss and turn it into a victory!  LEARN from our failures.  I dunno I don't like the sound of that.  If we learn from our failures we're just gonna want to fail all the time.  So we can learn!  And then our lives would deteriorate rapidly on account of Losing Everything All The Time.  Sure we'll learn a lot BUT AT WHAT COST.  I dunno.  Anyway.  Gonna take a bath or shower after this act.  Anyway.
     Why did I have to say that!  To make pharagraph slightly longer.  Oh I get it now.  Anyway.  Pharaoh Graph.  Egyptian Hieroglyphics.  What are those called again.  Hieroglyphics.  Well I nailed that right out of the gate didn't I.  What else is going on.  I feel like it would take Zero minutes for a Chess Grandmaster to figure out Tic Tac Toe.  He would just look at a blank Hashtag AS THEY'RE CALLED NOW and think okay three in a row and it would come to him in less than 5 seconds.  I envy them.  No I don't.  Brain is working too hard!  Who needs that.  Maybe they do.  They get off on thinking intensely and fast.  How sad.  I dunno.  What else is going on.  What kind of board games did they play in Ancient Egypt.  Trick questions Boards weren't invented until the Byzantine Empire.  Gotcha! 
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Dad is teaching tonight.  I'll eavesdrop IN PASSING a bit, sure!  I'm not gonna go out of my way to listen in.  But when I'm in transit from upstairs to downstairs and/or downstairs to outside SURE I'll focus in on what's being said through my ear canal.  I'm not gonna block it out!  Anyway.  It's hard to not listen to things unless you use your hands.  Fingers.  I feel like you gotta stick fingers in your ear-holes.  Just covering the ears with your hands will only get you half there.  And if you have no hands or fingers then you're gonna have a hard time doing anything about hearing.  Also you're gonna have a hard time with other parts of life.  But mainly the Not Hearing Things When You Don't Want To thing.  Anyway.
     Amazing.  Should we be able to fold our ears shut?  By just exercising the Folding Muscles in our ear?  Yeah sure I'll write an angry letter to God about that one day.  What's that nonsense.  God.  Gotta write an angry letter to CHARLES DARWIN.  THIS IS ALL HIS FAULT!  Anyway what else.  Is it possible Charles Darwin drank the nectar of Tortoises and is still living on Galapagos Island?  My guess?  Sure why not that's his prerogative.  If anyone can do it he can.  It's kind of a Hitler-In-Brazil thing.  And/or a Celebrity-Faking-Own-Death thing.  Either way the point is Who Cares.  Wait a second.  The BOYS were from Brazil.  Hitler HIMSELF might have moved to Argentina??  I don't have all the details in front of me.  The good news is Great Just Great I'm gonna take a shower and/or a bath now.  Be back soon! 

 

 

 

 

 

How Lucky Can Ya Get

    I think a Chess Master could figure out Connect Four in 5-30 minutes probably.  ESPECIALLY since they probably already know the rules and have just never really thought about it.  And if they have thought about it, even quicker!  Especially if they've thought about it 100% and already figured it out.  Then all they need is THREE SECONDS to remember what they already figured it out.  Also yes it takes everyone three seconds to remember things they already know.  That's standard.  Anyway Re-Calibrate time is creeping up!  And ya know what?  Pre-Re-Calibration is a pretty good time on its own merit!  I'm doing THE LAST OF THINGS that haven't been calibrated again.  Fun!  Fun to get stuff out of the way.  Presumably.  What else is going on presumably.  Lots of things!  We can presume a bunch of things that may never come to be factual at all!
     Great.  Not gonna be able to take a walk for maybe half an hour after the entry is over.  Whatta.. jip?  Maybe its a positive things.  Jips can be positive things.  I've never seen an exact definition of A Jip so we can only speculate (or PRESUME) what it may or may not mean.  Hmm Internet says it's spelled GYP.  I DON'T PLAY THAT GAME.  That's a slur against Gypsies one would imagine.  And I don't do racial slurs UNLESS IT'S AGAINST THE IRISH.  That's where I draw the line!  What else is going on.  Someone IN THE LAST CENTURY AND A HALF came up with how many ___ does it take to screw in a light bulb.  Hmm.  Gotta imagine before light bulbs they had the exact same joke but with some other technology reference.  How many Polish people does it take to have indoor plumbing.  That's directly preceding light bulbs.  How many people does it take to create Hieroglyphics.  I dunno.  I just don't know!  What else is going on.  Also gotta imagine indoor plumbing didn't come That Far Off after outdoor plumbing.  Pretty sure as soon as they developed outdoor plumbing they figured hey you know where this would be great?  IN DOORS.
    
I don't know what words or concepts mean, though, so that's something to keep in mind while trying to follow my logic.  Anyway.  Third paragraph of the act.  That's the middle paragraph!  No arguing that.  Hmm some sort of 1980 Horror TV Show Anthology on Shutter The Screaming Service.  I'll give that a shot!  Episodes are 50 minutes long?  That's a long time!  Almost TOO long.  Possibly Actually Too Long!  Maybe too short.  Or just right.  Or MUCH too short.  Yep I think that covers all of it.  Does Never Should Have Existed At All fit into one of those categories?  Because sure that's another way for it to be received.  Ugh.  Anyway what else is going on.  I dunno.  Drinking coffee.  I may or may not have explicitly said that this Act.  That I have coffee.  Well I said it now.  Definitely.  Almost 100% sure.  I guess it could be a Total Recall false memory that I said it several sentences ago.
    
Anyway.  I hope not!  That'd be weird!  What else is going on.  Another day without explicitly saying what I'm having for meals.  Another successful day!  If that's the measure of success for days then I'm knocking some days out of the park!  And I don't see why it shouldn't be the measure of success.  Lots of reasons why it should, NONE why it shouldn't be!  Maybe SEVERAL reasons why it shouldn't be.  But several rounds down to none.  Wonderful!  Watch some Sampsons today.  I get a kick out of those!  Makes me laugh out of my chucklehole.  What else is going on.  Ultimate Weight Loss goal would require me to lose another 13-19 pounds.  I'm ESTIMATING it at 15.  But how I feel when I get there will determine exactly where I wanna stop.  YEAH.  MAKES SENSE TO ME.  A LOT OF SENSE.  A LOT OF TOO MUCH SENSE.
    
Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  What language did they speak in Byzantine Empire.  Roman?  Better LTURQ.  KOINE GREEK, MEDIEVAL GREEK, AND LATE LATIN.  Oh NOW I get it.  Koine!  Makes all the sense in the world.  I think Koine Greek is just standard Ancient Greek.  That's the impression I got from clicking on the hyper link attached to the phrase and reading a solid 2-5 words on the page that ensued.  Amazing.  What else is going on.  I got a lot of fun stuff coming up for the rest of the day.  Like watching The Television Set and whatnot.  I get a lot out of doing that.  It amuses me temporarily!  And then makes me ANGRY.  And then amuses me again!  The point is what else is going on.  The entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:38 P.M.

 

 

 

 

 

Sunday, September 19, 2021

That Brings Me Back

    Hey friends.  Here I am!  To write more and whatnot.  What do I got going on today in the wide world of sports.  Wearing a nice shirt.  Let's hear it for shirts!  They keep our torso warm and/or respectable.  A bare torso has no place in polite society!  Also All Society Is Polite!  If it's impolite that ain't no society!  Making more progress with The Sampsons.  I like the part where Bart pulls pranks!  This kid is out of control AND I LOVE IT!  Also-- let's talk about it-- MARGE BE MARGE am I right?!  I don't know what that means.  You probably do, though!  I presumably knew what it meant at one point when I was first inspired to write it.  Thus you probably know what it means at one point-- this point!  You've eclipsed me in terms of knowing what I mean when I say things.  Well Done!
    
Cool.  What else is going on?  Presumably Bad Things.  I feel like ~75% of things that are going on are bad things.  With only ~25% being good things.  Also ALL THINGS must be either good or bad.  This is no time for sitting on the fence!  CHOOSE A SIDE.  Hmm I'll have a baked potato.  CHOOSE A MORE FUN SIDE.  Okay I'll have popcorn shrimp.  WELL DONE THAT'S ONE OF THE FUNNEST SIDES OUT THERE.  I haven't had popcorn shrimp in over 20 years.  But boy oh boy did I have it at some point over 20 years ago!  Delicious.  I like popcorn shrimp and chicken.  They are VERY CLEARLY not popped like popcorn.  They are fried.  Clearly!  I see you're attempting some clever misdirection but I'M ON TO YOUR TRICKS.   What else is going on.  Maybe play some Call Of Duty II today.  I have the call of duty.  Duty to play video game.  Call to call.  Huh.
    
I hope the Mets get a SUPTER STAR General Manager in the off season.  Like a Billy Beane and/or a ...Theo... Epstein!  Is his name Theo?  I'm drawing a blank.  Could be Theo!  Hey it is Theo good for him what a dumb name but then again IT'S GOT CHARACTER.  Either way a superstar GM will fix our team.  Gotta imagine something would fix The Mets.  This seems as good a place as any to start!  Oh so now it's "OUR," Team.  Yeah!  I'M A FAN.  I contribute to their franchise by WATCHING LOTS OF COMMERCIALS over the course of the year.  Gotta imagine all the commercials I've watched is the equivalent of 2,000 dollars in their pocket.  Hmm I feel like I should be seeing some of that money.  At least 40 or 50 dollars I got coming to me.  Now we play the waiting game.  Which is interesting because being a Met fan is playing the waiting game these days.  Waiting until next season.  To start over again!  Maybe then we'll be good enough!
     That sort of thing.  DAMNIT not only do we have to wait until next season now, but we have to wait until next AUGUST OR SO until the season gets interesting.  That's almost an entire year we have to wait until baseball is interesting again!  WHATTA JIP.  Then again that will give us time to move on with our lives and do better more worthwhile things.  Hmm.  Off the top of my head listen to Led Zeppelin.  I don't know why that was off the top of my head, either!  It just popped in!  Anyway hey you could do worse than listen to Led Zeppelin.  You might wanna wait until August or September to REALLY get into it but that's life or something I forget what's going on.  You could do a lot worse than having Led Zeppelin be your walk up music to Baseball At Bat.  You could do better, though.  AC/DC off the top of my head.
     Led Zeppelin is notoriously guarded about letting places play their music.  Good luck trying to get them to agree to you using their music 4 times a day every other day of the year!  Really good luck.  I hope it works out for you.  What else is going on.  Off the top of my head I don't know what else is going on.  Got coffee coming my way after this paragraph!  HMM maybe my walk up music would be something of my own creation.  That's a good way to get exposure for my side hustle music!  When my main hustle is baseball!  Hmm this would require me to be good at baseball.  AND it would require me to be good at music.  AND I'd have to be walking up to plates at least 3 or 4 times a day.  WALKING?  I don't remember signing up for this!  Then again this paragraph is almost over such hat I should just write nonsense for a sentence or two to get it done with so I can drink coffee imminently.  Hey I just accomplished that While Talking About That.  It's a reallll onomatopoeia.
    
Yeah!  So I got that going for me.  The older I get the more into Marge I get.  I mean she was always attractive as a teenager.  WAIT NO LET ME AMEND THAT.  When I was younger she was attractive as a teenager.  But now that I'm older I find her more attractive as a WOMAN.  That's the kind of Lady for me!  Look there's All Kinds Of Ladies and she's just ONE kind of lady for me.  I'm okay with All Kinds Of Ladies.  Well maybe 30, 40% of the kinds of ladies are kinds of ladies I'd be happy with!  Amazing.  What day is today.  Sunday.  That's great just great.  Also, look, I said Maggie is the ideal kid and that Bart and Lisa are jerks.  Bart and Lisa would be FINE kids.  They've each got a lot going for them.  I just feel Maggie would be a BETTER kid.  It takes all kinds though.  That's great just great.  Huh.
     Seventh paragraph.  MOSTaways through Act I.  And Act I is by far the biggest Act.  So thusly I AM ALMOST DONE WITH THE ENTRY.  You can't argue with that math!  Because it's wrong!  Not math at all!  Just nonsense!  Whoever came up with Math must have been pretty smart.  I feel like they're smarter than 90% of people to come up with Math.  AMAZING.  Then again they're somewhat dumb that they wasted all their time Coming Up With Math.  They should have spent it on more fun activities.  Like... hmm.. looking around my room to come up with a good fun activity... I know there's not likely to be information on that in my room but I don't know where else to look around for inspiration... OH RIGHT Writing In Notebooks!  They could have been writing in notebooks!  They probably were to come up with math.  You're coming up with math?  Best way of doing it is writing in notebooks.  Lots of notebooks!  SO there's that.
    
Eighth paragraph.  I feel like in my entire life I haven't come up with ONE thing in Math that's new.  Whatta letdown.  Anyway.  Finished my coffee.  That was relatively quick! Oh well I got what I wanted to get out of it.  Drinking it.  More or less.  Dad has a virtual class tomorrow night!  I can eavesdrop.  Get somethin' out of that.  Not sure what!  I guess a greater appreciation for my Dad.  It's every boy's dream to see their Dad work!  I guess.  It's every Dad's dream to see their boy see them work!  Maybe.  It's every work's dream to see Dad And Boy Come Together Somehow While The Work Is Going On.  Sounds about right.  Anyway I only have to write less than 2 and a half paragraphs until I get to take Nice Break To Remember.  It's time to decide what teams I want to root for in playoffs.  NEVER!  I REFUSE.  Fine I guess I'm not gonna be invested in playoff series at all.  THAT'S RIGHT!
    
What else is going on.  The Mets still have a ~.3% chance to make the playoffs?  .3%?  THAT'S ONLY ONE HUNDREDTH OF 30%.  And 30% is only 30% of THEM MAKING THE PLAYOFFS.  Ya Gotta Believe!  That's The Mets slogan I believe dating back to the 1960's.  Ya Gotta Believe.  Don't tell me what I gotta do.  This is ON YOU.  It's up to you idiots to do good in baseball, not me and how much I may or may not believe.  TAKE SOME RESPONSIBILITY YOU JERKS.  Anyway what else is going on.  It comes from 1973 not all the way back to the 60's.  THIS CHANGES NOTHING.  What else is going on.  Been taking seven walks the last 2 or 3 days.  WONDERFUL.  I get a kick out of bonus nighttime walk.  It's real... well.. it's real... gives me a kick.  That sort of thing GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Man oh man we're slowly creeping up to Recalibration Time Of Day To Remember.  Still several hours away but much closer now than when I first woke up!  Cool.  YES I finished my coke zero supply for the week, but now I know to get more for next week.  Anyway.  This year Mets Minor League Prospects seemed to be making some progress.  So that's good!  Gotta imagine that pays off somewhat in the long run.  Looks like by the end of the season in 2 weeks, I'll have placed between 4th and 6th out of 12 in my Fantasy Baseball 2021 League To Remember.  Pretty bad!  Not something to be proud of at all!  Oh well I know never to do anything again.  What if I fail?  Where's the fun in that.  Anyway hey now its time to take a Walking Break.  WALKING?  I don't remember signing up for this!  Wait a second I like walking.  I'll sign up for it right now!  Great.  Be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

Why Didn't You Say So

    Hey!  Got some water going.  I figure if I drink water 3 times a day instead of soda, that might be enough to make my soda last all week!  SURE I could have predicted I'd need more soda this week based on running out of soda the last few weeks and getting the same amount this week.  But I wasn't thinking clearly!  I've got some mental problems still and chief concern number one is Super marketers delivery orders.  Not making logical decisions all the time!  It's upsetting to those nearest to me!  Including me.  I'm VERY close to myself.  Practically overlapping!  What else is going on.  Shower or bath after this act.  Then Act III!  Amazing.  Hmm better consult Patriotism Calendar, I feel like today or a day soon may be another Patriotism Day.  OH NO it was Friday!  Constitution Day!  I missed it! Does that mean the constitution is now expired?  We forgot to re-up with the constitution!  Now we're back to NOTHIN'!
     Oh well such is life.  Constant Tuition.  The kids in college out there know what I'm talking about!  That they have to pay tuition.  Constantly!  Well that's to be expected I guess.  What else is going on.  Another day more than half down without talking about what delicious meals I'm eating.  I pity you.  Being in the dark completely.  Gotta be upsetting!  Oh well that's life I guess.  What else is going on.  I wonder what adventures The Sampsons are gonna be getting into today.  Gotta imagine 95% of them are adventures that will ring some sort of bell to me.  This is season 14 I'm up to!  I still remember most of these!  Even more than most!  95% Like I Said.  Oh okay.  Anyway I'm gonna have to take off my shirt, among other clothing, to take my bath or shower.  I was really enjoying this shirt.  Then again it'll make putting it on again later All The Sweeter.  Gotta look at the bright side of things.  Otherwise you might not be able to make it out and distinguish it's profile.  Other side is too dark!
     Anyway.  I blame Covid Pandemic for Mets woes this year.  Mets fans aren't at the stadium to root on their team!  How are The Mets supposed to know to do good if they're not getting encouragement in real time.  They're only people!  They forget to do good time and again.  Need to be reminded!  I know that's how it is for me.  If I don't get constant reminders to do good I will easily start doing bad.  In fact I'll do bad either way!  That's how much I need affirmation!  Huh.  At this rate I can take a bath timewise.  It wouldn't be holding up my schedule by spending the extra 4-10 minutes.  Hmm.  Well, I guess it would be.  By 4-10 minutes.  But that's negligible per what I want to accomplish and in what order of time.  The point is what else is going on.  I think it's pretty impressive that The Simpsons' Springfield has a minor league baseball team.  That's not bad for a city-state like Springfield!  Good for them I wish them the best of luck.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I think it's odd I remember episodes of The Simpsons from 2002 as well as I do.  Doesn't check out!  How many times could I have s een this!  Maybe Simpsons engrains itself on our memory gland somehow.  You see it once and it's permanent.  I blame the bright colors.  It CONFUSES our innards into activating Memory Catcher.  I don't know what that means.  Sounds more or less right, though!  Anyway.  Hmm I haven't gotten a sticker since NY Mayor Primary.  That was back in June!  I'm running low on stickers!  Well I'm not LOSING stickers.  Maybe I am gradually!  It's reasonable to guess that the stickers I have will have completely lost their stick 40 years from now.  So over the past year I'm that much closer to losing my stickers.  Oh no this is getting serious!  Anyway.  Huh.
    
Last paragraph before Cleansing Process!  Anyway.  I feel like I'm gonna cut my hair with my Dad's help in a few weeks.  And shave myself.  Mostly by myself!  Maybe my Dad helps somehow by standing off to the side and supervising.  I don't need supervision but I guess it couldn't hurt!  It could easily hurt.  Distract me!  But it could also easily help.  I NEED CONSTANT AFFIRMATION I already told you.  Supervision isn't affirmation.  I guess it could be.  Maybe.  Amazing.  Gonna give you a little inside info-- not gonna need a food delivery until TUESDAY.  You know what that means!  VERY easy to understand that sentence.  I'm definitely gonna go with assuming you know what it means.  That's how much faith I have in you!  Wonderful what else is going on.  Gonna take a bath now.  Be back soon!

 

 

 

Oh Well Too Late Now

    Hello friends.  Time to wrap up this entry.  Got water going on right now.  Got coffee in a paragraph.  Maybe replace water with snapple.  Snapple Will Not Replace Us.  Maybe they will.  I can't predict what Snapple will do and frankly no one can.  The good news is what else is going on.  Wanna start listening to different music!  Been listening to The Latest In Rock N Roll Music More Or Less the last month or two.  Over and over!  Now its time to find some Real Good Music.  Stuff I haven't heard before!  Hmm that would require me to determine what to listen to.  I don't know if I feel comfortable with Having To Do Something.  Sure it'll pay off in the intermediate run but for that one period of 5-10 minutes where I quickly go okay this band, that band, and that third band, gonna go through those next would be TORTURE.  Not literally.
     Amazing.  Got coffee going.  Still stuck with water!  I poured it and now I have to drink it.  How terrible!  That's where that saying comes from.  You poured your water now drink it.  Which means if you do something stupid you have to accept the terrible consequences of it.  Anyway.  Gotta imagine water is the most nutritious thing you can drink.  I know other stuff has POSITIVE things in it.  Vitamins and positive sugar and calories and VITAMINS.  But all in all I feel like water is probably your safest bet.  I CALL.  I have vitamin water zero Energy Flavored.  That's Lemon for you newbies.  Hey I win!  Amazing.  I haven't had vitamin water in YEARS of living.  If you can even call that living.  Anyway what else is going on.  Can't argue with other flavors of Vitamin Water, either.  They're ALL good.  Maybe Black is one of the not as great flavors but even that is good!  Black Vitamin water is called XXX.  I think that means it's made out of Venom.  That'd be my first guess.
     Not snake venom.  Spiderman venom!  Get with the program.  Gotta imagine drinking Spiderman Venom wouldn't be good for your innards.  Well.  Maybe it WOULD be good for your innards.  Certainly won't be good FOR YOU though.  What else is going on.  Probably part blueberry and part ACAI.  I feel like ACAI rings some sort of bell.  ACAI BLUEBERRY AND POMEGRANATE.  How could I forget about pomegranate!  It's been there for me through thick and thin.  When I used to drink Juice Water from Supermarket it was often Cranberry-Pomegranate..  Also sure I don't know what ACAI is and to be honest I don't really want to know!  Some things are better left to the imagination.  Or, even better, don't imagine it!  Just move on with your live not caring at all about Acai and what it may or may not be!
     Penultimate paragraph!  Great.  Also don't you go buying vitamin water zero XXX's at the store and think you're getting pornography.  No pornography in the bottle at all!  Well at least none that I've noticed.  Maybe there's tiny pornography not seen by the naked eye or even your standard microscope.  We can't say for sure!  All we know is that no one has noticed it or else it would have been in the news.  What else is going on.  Last day of the weekend.  Unless today is a three day weekend.  And the third day is tomorrow.  Which it isn't.  The point is I forget.  Pretty sure I went into this with a point, though.  It doesn't sound like me to say things without their being some sort of point.  Hmm.  There's a point to everything.  We just don't know what it is!  That's what life is all about.  Maybe.  I dunno.  Sounds plausible I guess.
    
Last paragraph!  Wonderful.  Watch some Horror Movies today.  By which I mean a single horror movie.  By which I mean maybe a third of a horror movie.  By which I mean I'll spend the day doing something else.  Anyway.  The scariest horror movie of all is the one you never see.  There's nothing to fear but fear itself.  And one day there will be a movie called Fear Itself.  And we can rightly fear that it will be a bad movie.  Yep all that checks out.  What else checks out.  I'm checking out!-- at the end of this paragraph!!!  Well you could argue I Checked Out a couple of months ago and you would win that argument but we're not here to argue we're here to finish entries.  And that's just what I've done!  I'll be back tomorrow with more wonderful words.  See ya.

-1:37 P.M.

 

 

 

Saturday, September 18, 2021

Look No Further

    What's up friends.  Hmm an entry that doesn't start with the letter, "H."  Gotta wonder if that's gonna pay off in the long run.  Anyway the important thing is that Coke Zero really grew on me!  By which I mean I have formed a tumor.  And also coincidently I also mean I enjoy the taste now!  While I was drinking it I was like this is amazing this is way better than the diet pepsi crap I've been drinking.  Then I drank some diet pepsi and I was like ON THE OTHER HAND THIS IS PRACTICALLY THE EXACT SAME THING.  Ups and downs to both of em!  Coke Zero tastes good but Pepsi is The Cola Of The People!  Coke fans are OUT OF TOUCH.  I don't like it!  Not one bit!  Maybe one or two bits!  But not MOST bits!  Made some more progress with The Sampsons and the Tweelightzone.  Amazing.  I'm entertained enough!
     I still have another Coke Zero bottle for this week.  Gotta make the most of it.  By which I mean getting my Mom to try it.  Spread the joy around, that's what I say!  Presumably I heard it in a commercial for Almond Joy Candy Bar.  But the commercial was probably more like you're NOT gonna wanna spread the joy around you want this candy bar all to yourself.  Delicious!  That's the impression we're under!  That's commercials for ya.  There's a candy called Almond Joy, right?  I didn't just imagine that?  YES there is.  The coconut candy bar!  Hmm here's a candy bar where the main difference from other candy bars is COCONUT.  I know what we should call it to emphasize that ALMOND Joy.  Where do they come up with this stuff.  The JOY part implies coconut.  Joy makes people think of coconut!  Well maybe NOW it does but before this candy bar it wouldn't have.
    
Anyway.  Was there a time in history where the premise of candy bar was that it was either good for nutrition or it gave you energy.  I feel like people probably were like Hmm gotta do some strenuous work better power up with a chocolate bar.  I envy them.  Imagine eating candy bars and thinking in your head ALSO this is good for me.  That sounds like the best possible way to live your life ever.  Well one of the best ways at least.  In the top 30 percentile, let's leave it at that.  What kind of sociopath eats candy bars NOWadays.  Full sized candy bars.  Just for fun.  WHO ARE these people.  Oh right regular people who treat themselves now and again.  I dunno I don't like the sound of that.  These regular people seem PRETTY suspicious to me.  I don't think they're regular at all!  I feel they're SLIGHTLY IRREGULAR and you can't argue with a feeling!  HMM I could have candy bars for breakfast.  Once I stop dieting to lose weight and have slightly bigger breakfasts, Candy Bar makes A LOT of sense for breakfast.  Oh no now I'm a slightly irregular person.  And I had been going my entire life being VERY Regular.  Oh well everything ends eventually.
     Cool!  Off the top of my head maybe some sort of Kit Kat.  Kit kat isn't your standard 4x1 Candy Bar.  Shapewise.  But it's delicious!  I like the part where it's candy.  That's what I get out of it!  Also YEAH candy bar probably gives you a very short term energy boost.  From the sugar!  I know physiologically sugar supposed to give you short term energy boost but I personally have never experienced it!  I get long term AND short term immediate lethargy.  I guess I'm just A LITTLE DIFFERENT from the status quo.  I'm an INDIVIDUAL.  I can't tolerate sugar re: getting energy or not.  That's the way God made me.  Wow what an asshole.  I dunno.  It doesn't come up that often so it's not that big a deal!  Anyway.  Some sort of election going on in Canada.  Interesting!  I thought they were a dictatorship for some reason.  Turns out they have elections.  SHAM elections most likely, yes, but at least they're TRYING.
     Amazing!  Coffee after this paragraph.  I support whoever is the most progressive.  Because that's the kind of guy I am!  Anyway gotta imagine that person is gonna see a bump in the polls because of my endorsement.  What endorsement.  I said no one's name at all.  You know who I'm talkin' about.  That guy whose better than the other guys.  Why should I have to say his name when you ALREADY know his name more than I do.  That settles that.  I feel like the Mets loss last night was more or less the final nail in the coffin.  Also is that expression a reference to being buried alive.  Until the final nail in the coffin, you can regain consciousness and escape your doom.  Once they're done nailing up the coffin though, you can yell your heart out but what can they do to help you, coffin is nailed shut, nothing to be done.  Hmm.  Why are they nailing coffins anyway.  I feel like you're not gonna be opening up your coffins if they're not nailed shut.  On account of being dead.  What exactly does nailing it shut accomplish?
     HMM.  Keeping people from going INTO the coffin.  Anyway here comes coffee.  Amazing!  I like the character of HOMER in The Sampsons.  He gets the most laughs as far as I'm concerned.  Maybe even a MAJORITY of laughs, and not even just a plurality.  Which is very impressive considering there's 60 main characters.  So for one of them to get over 50% of laughs?  He's doing pretty good for himselves!  Huh.  Only character that I don't like is MAGGIE.  Well she's okay.  I feel like I've grown to appreciate The Baby more as time goes on.  Also if I ever have kids Maggie is the best role model for them.  Bart and Lisa are jerks.  I want my kids to be like Maggie!  Hmm that makes sense.  THEN AGAIN...  I dunno what else is going on.  Also Homer is a great role model for men.  He's an idiot and no one cares.  He doesn't care.  Other people don't care!  Everyone just accepts how Dumb he is.  That's the dream right?
    
Seventh paragraph.  Roll Model.  Hmm.  Been a while since I ate a roll.  Used to get some good KAISER rolls from Somewhere.  Maybe Bagel Shop?  Maybe Bakery?  Either way this goes back AT LEAST 10-15 years.  Bakery is gone completely.  Bagel Store has become obsolete somehow which I forget.  Either way delicious.  Used to just eat Bread as a snack.  Often in the form of rolls!  That's the life, too, right?  That and candy bars and being accepted for being dumb.  And not just accepted.  ENCOURAGED.  I feel like people are 100% on board with ENGAGING with Homer's stupidity.  Anyway what else is going on.  It's a good thing The Simpsons wasn't a live action sitcom because everyone would be 33 years older than they started off.  And having the children still live in the house in their 30's and 40's would be a hassle and a half to explain.
     Hmm.  I live in the same house as my original family and I'm in my 30's and 40's.  Yeah but that's easy to explain.  Crazy and/or dumb and/or lazy.  Oh Now I Get It.  Fascinating.   I feel like I'm a solid 2 out of 3 of those things.  I don't know WHICH ones but 2 out of 3 sounds about right.  Eighth paragraph!  I guess.  Hey it's Saturday today.  That happens all the time.  More or less.  I haven't made much progress in Rocksmith IT SEEMED but then I was just playing regular guitar and suddenly I'm a little bit better!  I guess practicing songs makes you better in general!  How come no one told me this.  Seems like a pretty big oversight.  I am SO OVER sight.  Hearing is where it's at!  Also can't forget about TOUCH.  I would imagine.  I forgot about Touch for the most part but maybe you can't.  Hey get a load of this.  I find it odd that to see we have BONUS things (eyeballs) but to hear we have HOLES (ears).  I know that doesn't check out.  Gotta imagine that Inside Ears we got some stuff that accept vibrations or something and that's how we hear.  Hmm.  What do we hear with exactly.  Gonna have to look into that one.  Google HOW DO WE HEAR.  Oh.  Eardrum.  That rings a bell.
    
Penultimate paragraph of the Act!  Wonderful.  Explain SMELL then.  We smell with HOLES in our face and there's no EARDRUMS there.  Gotcha.  I got ya there!  Anyway.  At a point in my life I guess I could hang up newly cleaned shirts on hangers.  And then hang them over either My Door or My File Cabinet.  I can't fit all shirts on either one to hang.  So I split them between both hanging spots.  At random!  There's no, "A," hanging spot and, "B."  And where certain shirts belong one way or the other.  It's RANDOM get off my back about it.  I don't see how people can take the shirt off your back.  That doesn't sound like a normal shirt.  Shirts gotta be taken off your head.  Or maybe through your torso and down your legs if the neck part of your shirt is really loose.  But NOT off your back.  Unless they rip it off.  But if they're keeping the shirt intact NO WAY.
     Unless it's a Stripper Shirt.  We're talking about REGULAR shirts though.  What else is going on.  When I was a kid I preferred a Charleston Chew and now that I'm adult I realize WHAT WAS I THINKING.  Yeah that's a good candy bar but let's be honest it's a bit too complicated with this chewiness.  Candy bars could be slightly chewy!  Or slightly crunchy!  But TOO chewy or TOO crunchy is too complicated!  Keep it simple!  Then again what's going on.  I forget.  I don't have a problem with too chewy or too crunchy candy bars.  It's a candy bar!  Who cares!  Delicious!  Then again what else is going on.  What kind of chores do I have to do today.  Off the top of my head watch 1 or 2 Twilight Zone episodes.  I don't have to do it!  But I WILL do it and I WILL NOT be 100% happy about it.  That's life.  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

I Don't Feel So Good

    Hello friends.  Time to write some more paragraphs.  I've been calling the blobs of words, "Paragraphs," for years.  Not sure if that's technically correct.  Perhaps Paragraphs need to be more focused and/or sensical!  SENSICAL ISN'T A WORD?  THAT'S NONSENSICAL.  Nonsensical, by the way, IS a word.  I'm gonna write an angry letter to someone as soon as I figure out Which Letter Is The Angriest.  Off the top of my head maybe, "T."  Capital, "T."  YEAH.  Anyway.  Ya know what?  I liked coke zero.  But then I liked pepsi EVEN MORE.  Mixing it up re: Colas & Their Flavors makes ya appreciate what you got NO MATTER which cola.  So basically it's been a good 24 hours.  Really taking stock in what's important.  Anyway.  If you need to repel a vampire, write the letter, "T," for a good makeshift Cross.  Especially lower case.  But uppercase is close enough too!
     Anyway.  Is it possible vampires aren't real?  I feel like there's a solid chance that vampires don't exist.  Well sure not with all these, "t's," floating around.  They'd never have a moment's rest if they're reading something.  Also what do Vampire have to do with Jesus.  Nothin'!  Vampires should be like Hmm Jesus Signal WHO CARES WE'RE VAMPIRES we don't believe in Christianity You Idiots.  That's life I guess.  What else is Life which I Might Guess.  Probably gonna take a bath today.  Don't throw the baby out with the bathwater.  In fact probably don't throw the baby out at all.  You're pot committed to taking care o this baby through adulthood.  Or maybe Up To Adulthood.  But if you really wanna go the extra mile, be invested in him even when he's a grown up!  Feel like I've done that before.  Baby with Bathwater.  Interesting.  Most of the times I've done stuff before I don't realize until an hour or two later!  So this is great news! ...?
    
Wonderful.  I guess!  It gets me closer to finishing the entry, that's for sure.  But then not only does it feel bad NOW but it'll feel bad LATER.  That's the worst thing I can recollect From Entry.  Spending the rest of the day knowing I did all my favorite bits before.  I'd rather think NOTHING was worthwhile this past entry than think SOME WORTHWHILE THINGS were done before!  How terrible.  I'm wasting all of our times.  Either way I guess.  But the point is repeating yourself is the worst thing you can ever do in life and you can take that to some bank.  I think maybe part of it isn't so much the entry but that I think things over and over again and I don't realize it until later.  Just knowing my brain is just cycling through the same crap year after year is kind of upsetting!  Oh well that's life. 
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  No coffee with act II!  You know what that means!  Coffee with act III!  Hey great.  Maybe you didn't know what that means.  You sure do know it now!  I was VERY explicit about that which that means and whatnot.  Anyway.  Watched 30 seconds of 1976 King Kong.  I LIKE it.  This King Kong special effects is the best out of the 18 iterations of King Kong.  Not the most realistic but the most FUN.  Maybe 10% of the 290 King Kongs were more fun but I haven't seen all of the 900,000 versions of King Kong yet.  What else is going on.  Also who elected Kong King.  NO ONE!  THAT'S NOT HOW KINGS WORK.  TRICK QUESTION.  Fine then how did Kong's lineage become royalty in the first place.  Well clearly Kong's great great great great grandfather just asserted power.  Ya gotta want it!  It's up for grabs for anyone whose got the gumption!
     Last paragraph of the act.  There's King Kongs, Spidermen, and Stars Being Born.  They happen all the time!  Hmm what would happen if there was a threeway crossover.  Well King Kong and Star Being Born are already pretty similar.  King Kong becomes a hit on broadway at the end of some King Kongs.  I don't think he really likes it that much, though.  He always starts running amuck after his big debut.  Doesn't seem to even WANT to be a successful Broadway actor.  Ya gotta want it!  What else is going on.  Spiderman becomes A Star but a Super Hero star not an Entertainment Star.  Although I guess he's part entertainment.  Shows up at trade shows and helps sell newspapers and whatnot.  Certainly there's some aspect to what he does which is just flat out entertainment.  Anyway, I dunno.  HEY it's time to take a bath.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

Hey It's Been A While

    Wonderful.  Time to finish up this entry.  Got some orange soda going.  Gonna have coffee going after this paragraph.  That's about all I will have going for the very immediate future.  Well I'd probably be refilling orange soda.  Bu that's just more orange soda.  So more or less the same thing.  Amazing.  Another day down without telling you explicitly what I'm having For Meals!  I don't think I even told you implicitly.  Or inexplicitly.  Whatever words are in real life.  Maybe King Kong is more of a passive title and doesn't mean he's actually king of anything.  Just a nickname he accumulated and/or gave himself.  And/or accumulated.  What else is going on.  How could King Kong love a Human-sized woman.  That'd be like me looking at an ant and being like GIVE ME SOME OF THAT!!!  Except it's a person and not an ant.  But an ant sized person.  Also maybe a little bigger than an ant.  Maybe more like being attracted to Let's Say A Mouse Or Rat.  Which COULD happen but not often.
    
Coffee time!  Also KING KONG ISN'T HUMAN.  It'd be like ME being attracted to A RAT SIZED APE.  Which, let's face it, isn't in the cards at all!  I'm sorry to say!  I'd barely be attracted to a rat sized human!  Well I guess that depends on the qualities of the human.  Some miniature humans are more attractive than others!  Anyway what else is going on.  I dunno.  Man oh man am I getting close to Recalibration Time Of The Day.  Maybe an hour from this very moment.  Maybe a little bit more.  NOT MUCH LESS THOUGH.  Okay jeez calm down.  Put 2nd of 2 Coke Zeroes in the fridge.  I did it for my Mom more than myself.  I'm encouraging her to give it a try.  She seems less enthusiastic than she should be but I think she's open to giving it a shot.  She only drinks DIET DR PEPPER lately.  And very little at that!  Not much soda at all!  So that's why she's not pumped up that much about a new cola.  Still though like I said SHE'S WRONG.
    
Anyway.  She doesn't even finish A SINGLE 2 LITER BOTTLE A WEEK.  What the HELL is wrong with this person.  Oh, right.  Probably has stuff wrong with her internally.  She's elderly.  Maybe she can't tolerate flavored carbonated beverages as much as a Young Man Like Me can.  Oh well I pity her.  Mostly for this.  Maybe for some other stuff, too!  That's her business not mine.  Cool.  HMMM what other stuff am I enthusiastic that takes place in the door of my refrigerator.  That's about it.  Some cranberry juice in there that I don't drink.  I used to drink it sometimes!  When it was 100% diet flavored!  Now it's just Half Diet and I don't drink it!  What else is in that nook.  I dunno.  I can't even PICTURE it.  I can sort of picture Other Stuff Being There.  But I can't figure it out!  Not milk!  That's ELSEWHERE.
     Wonderful.  Penultimate paragraph.  Sometimes some orange juice in there.  But more often there's not!  I feel like right now There's Not.  Amazing.  Haven't had Milk in a long, long time.  I used to have it often with iced coffee.  NOW I drink HOT coffee.  And use Cream!  MILK has gone the way of the dodo bird.  Wait a second there's a bird called Dodo?  I'm gonna have to look that one up that can't be right.  Also I know there was dodo bird BUT I wanna look it up anyway to see what it looked like and was all about.  I bet it's kind of weird!  Some sort of chicken or duck flightless bird.  And it went extinct IN THE 17th CENTURY.  Oh no we used to be able to interact with it and now we can't.  What a jip!  Now we'll NEVER be able to taste it.  We being Us.  Back then they presumably tasted it.  DAMNIT.  Wikipedia says people preferred to eat parrots and pigeons to dodo.  So we're not missing out on much! ... Re: eating dodos.  But NOW I feel we're missing out on much by Not Eating Parrots and Pigeons.  Oh well there's still time to correct that!
     Last paragraph.  I don't believe it.  HAH. DOO DOO.  Really makes ya think.  Anyway let's wrap this entry up once and for all.  Probably gonna watch some The Sampsons today.  Been getting my fair share out of watching those!  Maybe some Tales From Them Crypts, too.  I feel like I could get a kick out of that once or twice today!  Maybe some OTHER STUFF.  Well sure but I guess it depends on What The Other Stuff May Or May Not Be Or Not.  Anyway.  My first thought was I'd eat a parrot before a pigeon but I dunno!  Parrots can sound like they're talking.  I dunno if I wanna eat an animal that mimics human voice and/or language!  Rather eat a Disease Bird.  Gotta imagine pigeons inherently are diseased.  Not just sometimes.  Always!  Just LOOK AT EM they look diseased as a BASELINE.  Anyway what else is going on.  Oh, the entry is over!  Wonderful.  I'll see ya tomorrow.

-1:37 P.M.

 

 

 

Friday, September 17, 2021

I See Things A Little Differently

    Hi!  Got some coffee going early on in the entry.  We're talkin I felt like it.  Waiting for Super market delivery!  Could come at any time!  Starting NOW.  Can't come earlier than now!  I would have noticed.  Anyway what's new in the wide world of sports.  Just had a flash thought of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles II: Return Of The Ooze.  Something about the guy who delivers pizza on a motorcycle.  A bike motorcycle.  It was a bike that was partially electric but not a full fledged motorcycle.  And he had a nice little nook to hold The Pizza Pie.  Hmm why did I think of that.  I just read a headline about someone who got flushed down into the sewer during Hurricane a week or two ago.  TMNT live in sewer on purpose.  Yep that must be it.  Oh, right.  Delivery!  That could be it too.  Those two things combined into My Flash Thought.
     Fascinating.  I don't have flash thoughts often at all!  Usually there's a build up and then a build down to my thoughts.  And that's the way I like it!  Also MOVIE.  My life is a movie so it only makes sense that I'd have a flash thought of Another Movie.  Anyway I accepted laundromatted clothes yesterday!  All folded up and whatnot.  Not gonna unfold the shirts to put them on hangers-- not just yet!  Instead I'll stuff 'em in a drawer.  By which I mean I Already Stuffed Them In A Drawer.  I used to be confused by the word Drawer because I always pronounced it Draw and when I was young I wondered where this ER stuff was coming from.  I don't like it!  Not now, not then, not ever!  Maybe later!  I reserve the right to start liking it at some point in the future if I feel like it!  Why box myself in when I don't necessarily have to!
     Cool.  Hmm nothing happened in that paragraph.  I feel like something barely happened in the first paragraph.  But absolutely nothing in the second paragraph!  Also third paragraph AIN'T OFF TO A GREAT START.  Making some progress in The Simpsons and The Twilight Zone.  At this point I'll be done with the shows sometime after I'm dead.  Well great now I have something to look forward to in the afterlife.  Watch some The Simpsons.  Before I thought of that the afterlife seemed like it was gonna be one big chore.  Now I know I CAN WATCH TV.  I'm not sure if that's Heaven or Hell.  Sounds like Purgatory.  Watching TV is One Big Purgatory.  Also I'm under the impression Purgatory is SLIGHTLY negative.  Not exactly neutral.  On the slightly crappy side of things.  Maybe specifically boring.  That's the best way to sum up the experience.  Because you're like jeez nothing ever happens AND it's taking forever!  Sounds about right.
     Hey someone left a paperback bible in front of my front door this morning.  Like a full book!  100 or 120 pages!  I've gotten religion pamphlets before, sure.  But this was a whole book!  Anyway I threw it out because I've Had It Up To Here With Christianity Bibles.  Who needs it!  Hmm wonder what kinda stuff is in there.  Maybe I want to change religions.  They went through the trouble of producing an entire book, the last I can do is Worship Their God.  Sounds about right.    HEY Yom Kippur is over and I FORGOT COMPLETELY to apologize to God.  I was really considering doing that for a solid 90 seconds!  Oh well there's always next year.  Assuming God doesn't kill me this year for my sins.  Which he might!  That's his prerogative!   I can't really argue one way or another.
     Anyway.  I dunno.  I'd order some pizza from this guy who befriends the Teenage Ninja Mutant Turtles.  He seems like he knows what he's doing re: delivering pizza.  Also how can mutant turtles hold things.  They have no opposable thumbs!  They barely have thumbs at all!  That's the ONE part of this movie that doesn't make sense.  They covered ALL the other bases.  Anyway what else is going on.  Is April O Neil supposed to be INTO the turtles.  Because I think the turtles are definitely INTO HER.  Oh well that's life.  Donatello uses a stick to hurt people.  What do you call Stick Fighters in real life.  I feel like that's fallen out of favor but I feel like there was a time and place in history where there were Stick Fighters.  I'd look that up right quick but I wouldn't know where to start.  Stick Fighters wouldn't accomplish much per my assumptions.
     Sixth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Now we're into the time of the day where Super market SAID they'd deliver.  Sometimes it's a bit early or late.  But now we're into the exact time they promised!  Wonderful.  Also I've always heard Donatello is good with machines or technology but I can't remember him ever actually using that skill.  Sure I've only had limited exposure to the turtles adventures and what I have seen I don't remember but if you don't count any of those qualifiers my point is a good point!  What else is going on.  Hmm.  Teenage Mutant Turtles must be horny all the time.  On account of being teenagers.  What the Hell are they gonna do re: finding mates.  No female mutant turtles!  What the Hell can they do.  HEY I just accepted Super Market Delivery.  They came right on time for the earliest they could which was in the time they specified.  AMAZING how convenient.
    
Seventh paragraph!  I put stuff away Like It Was Nothin'!  Took me no more than 10 minutes.  Hmm if It Was Nothin' it would have taken me no more than No Minutes.  That's life I guess.  Hmm.  I have flash thoughts every now and again.  I get my fair share!  Oh well.  Sure I prefer thoughts where there's a build up and a build down.  But ya take what you can get re: thoughts.  Anything is better than nothing!  I dunno I might enjoy some time with No Thoughts.  That sounds fun and productive too!  Websites give Mets a 1-2% chance of making playoffs as of now.  I think it's lower!  Prove me wrong!  You can't.  They may or may not make the playoffs but I don't see how you can successfully prove I was wrong re: estimating their odds right now.  Unless you have some sort of SUPER Odds Calculator that somehow is the End All Be All that can't be argued with.  Which YOU DON'T. ...Probably not at least!
    
Oh well.  Hmm wonder what happened in the Bible.  It was the King James version!  Wow King James?  Now we're talking!  Started watching the three part documentary on the 1986 Mets Baseball Team To Remember.  I enjoy it!  I'm a Mets fan for some reason no one is really sure of and I ENJOY seeing them do stuff!  Anyway.  Now that Super market delivery is out of the way, what do I have in store for the rest of the day?  Same stuff as every day.  But I get to live with the pleasure of having Non-Every-Day-Chore taken care of.  Then again that chore is KIND OF FUN when it's only 10 minutes.  I can get, "Into," transferring things from Bag to putting them on Oak Tag on floor to putting stuff away in fridge and/or freezer and/or cabinets!  It's like a real life game of TETRIS but you can't lose!  Well you can.  But you have all the time in the world to correct your mistakes.  Unlike Tetris!  Hmm Tetris should have a Do-Over option.  I feel like I fail a lot in life and I need do-overs!
     Ninth paragraph!  Mets have a baseball game tonight.  That's one thing I can do later on.  Watch them play that baseball game.  That sort of thing.  Guinness book of world records for Longest Game Of Human Tetris Ever Played.  Seems easy to get that record.  Just play Any Amount Of Time Of Human Tetris.  Sounds fun to me.  Fun AND productive.  Hmm a lot of those shapes might be inconvenient to make.  Might need to get some gymnasts or body contortionists.  The 4x1 pieces, though, I feel like a lot of people could accomplish that.  After all what is the human body if not a 4x1 tetris piece.  Hmm.  I don't like the sound of Accomplishing A Tetris, though.  With the 4x1 piece.  Wiping out 4 lines at once.  Those people will disappear into thin air!  Doesn't sound good for them.  Maybe it is!  They might re-appear in a BETTER dimension than the one we're in.  I envy them.  What else is going on.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it!  Pretty far ahead of time today because of waking up early and whatnot.  Great!  If you're playing human tetris you definitely wanna be the guy who for all intents and purposes is The Guy Playing The Game Of Human Tetris.  Directing the pieces where to go one by one.  That way you can accumulate high scores while everyone else is just part of the game.  What else is going on.  Is there any real competition to Guinness Book Of World Records.  They don't own the patent on Keeping Track Of Records.  Gotta imagine some other company (rival beer company?) wants to keep track of records!  Better look into that.  Google ALTERNATE RECORDS OF RECORDS.  HEY Google offered me NOTHIN relevant based on that search.  What the Hell!  What a let down.  Anyway I'll be back a little bit later.

 

 

That Sounds Delicious

    Got some Coke Zero going on!  It's okay.  I prefer other colas, sure, but I don't hate it!  Maybe I'll get used to it to the extent that I Just Don't Care.  As of now though I care a lot.  Anyway gonna write this act, take a shower, write act II, take a walk and then YOU GUESSED IT RECALL time.  I mean RECALIBRATION time.  I do get to recall myself for governor of my life though, too.  Hmm this is a tough one.  If I'm recalled who will replace me.  That's the key question when we get down to it.  Larry Elder?!?! That hardly seems fair.  I assume if Larry Elder has campaign signs his slogan would be RESPECT YOUR ELDERS.  I assume that'd be his slogan even if he didn't have campaign signs!  In fact I'm sure it was his slogan even before he ever thought of running for office at all!
    Hmm.  What else is going on.  Got delicious meals in store for today Don't You Worry About Me.  Well sure you can worry about me.  I take it as a compliment.  But I got Meals down so you can focus your worrying on something else.  You heard it here first.  Also I feel like You should be allowed to vote in the recall election of whether I will continue to be Governor of myself.  Why not.  The more people participating in Democracy the better!  That's my general feeling more or less.  Sure it's up for debate whether you should have a vote for this while you're generally not a citizen Of Me for the most part.  But I feel you're close enough that you have a stake in Myself!  What was I talking about.  Oh.  Whether I should crowdsource an opinion of whether I should continue to drink Coke Zero.  THAT'S what I was talking about.  Sounds about right.
    
Hmm I'll drink some more Coke Zero.  Lemme at it!  Anyway.  I dunno.  Gonna put these clean shirts on hangers just as soon as I finish wearing the clean shirts from LAST CLEANSING that are already on hangers.  Why mix em up.  No reason!  That's how I feel.  Anyway I should probably clean my pants at some time.  Been wearing these pants every day for roughly half a year.  At this point they gotta be pretty smelly!  Anyway.  Haven't worn de-oderant in maybe a decade.  Armpits gotta be pretty smelly!  Maybe get AXE deoderant.  Big fan of their ad campaign.  They know what they're doing!  Also they're made by MAXIM: THE MEN'S MAGAZINE.  THEY HAVE SEXUAL PICTURES OF WOMEN IN THE PAGES PER MY UNDERSTANDING.  Maybe if I wear their deoderant sexual women will be attracted to me!  SEXUALLY!  I'm sold sign me up.
    
Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wait a second internet is showing NOTHING re: Maxim being related to Axe.  Hmm.  Where the Hell did I get that idea from.  Is it possible I just saw a commercial for Axe in a Maxim Magazine and was like Well Clearly They're In Cahoots!  I don't think so!  But then again I have no clue where else I got this idea.  I mean sure they're marketed to more or less the same market.  But that can't be it!  That can't be it!!!  Oh well that's life time to move on.  Looking forward to a nice shower today.  No bath!  Wanna get this cleansing process over and done with so I can fit in a walk before my Dad's walk later.  I got TIME CONSTRAINTS I can't be taking a bath you idiot.  SURE I could probably fit it in almost definitely BUT WHY RISK IT.  That's my hot take.
     Hmm.  I don't think I've ever BOUGHT and/or USED Axe.  Because I'm a SMART GUY resistant to their ad campaign!  Hmm what brand of deoderant did I used to use.  Better look up brands of de-oderant.  And then I'll see the correct answer and be like oh right that.  LMLTURQ!  Hmm maybe DEGREE?  That's a possibility.  THIS IS GOOD STUFF LETS KEEP IT GOING.  Anyway.  Gonna ask my Mom to get me some de-odorant.  It couldn't hurt!  Unless I Huff It a lot.  That might hurt!  Huffing is a thing, right?  Huffing de-oderant?  Why shouldn't it be.  Anyway great just great.  Got coffee lined up for the last act of the day!  Now we're talking!  We were talking before, too!  But the important thing is we're still talking!  I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

I Don't Play That Game

    Hello.  Got coffee going and coke zero.  Delicious.  And nutritious!  Well coffee has some nutritional value at least.  And gotta imagine Coke Zero has some negative nutritional value.  So there's that!  Told my Mom to get me some deoderant next time she's getting Amazon Delivery.  We're going with GEL not SPRAY.  Look is spray MUCH MORE FUN?  Yeah!  But gel is SAFER and more ADULT.  Spraying is for kids.  MEN GEL.  Anyway.  Didn't know what brand to ask for so I went with Degree!  Seems about right.  All the Mets need to do is sweep the three game series with Philadelphia and THEY'LL BE TIED FOR SECOND PLACE.  See they've got the division right where the ywant them.  Also the wild card.  They've got the wild card right where they want... it.  Makes sense.  Who came up with the term wild card for sports.  Where a team doesn't win a division but makes the playoff anyway.  And couldn't they have taken their job more seriously.  HEY THIS TEAM IS A WILD CARD IN PLAYOFFS.  Let's call the playoff berth THE WILD CARD.  Seems DUMB to me.
    And trust me I KNOW DUMB.  Not really.  To me everything is dumb.  And thusly nothing is dumb.  That's how things work in my head unfortunately.  Hmm.  Is deoderant one word?  Yes.  Yes it is.  WAIT A SECOND.  NO!  NO IT ISN'T.  Wait a minute.  Maybe it is.  THEN AGAIN IT COULD BE NOT.  YES IT IS.  FOR REAL THIS TIME.  IT'S RECOGNIZED AS A WORD BY THE COMPUTER.  We settled that once and for all.  Now all we need to do is figure out how to spell it.  Damnit the work keeps piling up and up.  Odor is easy.  We know how to spell odor.  ANT?  ENT?  Deodorant.  There we go that's it.  Deodorant!  Now we know.  I keep trying to picture a deoderant can and/or gel to see if I can see in my mind's eye the brand.  The closest I get to is imagining the can of shaving cream I used to have collecting dust on my bathroom sink. RED.  Nice red can.  But that's shaving cream not deodorant!  I dunno RED rings some sort of bell.  Was RED involved in this somewhat?
    
Cool.  Three more paragraphs to go!  I don't believe it.  Way ahead of schedule today.  A solid hour!  I can do whatever I want with that hour.  Watch TV!  Watch Something ELSE ON TV!  Have TV on in the background and do Literally Nothing In The Foreground But We Still Can't Say I'm Fully Watching TV Either?  I think that last one has a lot going for it.  Let's do that.  Anyway.  Rookie of the year.  Pretty sure they should have an award for Old Timer Of The Year.  And the only people who qualify are the people retiring at the end of the year.  SURE they'd need to formalize their upcoming retirement ahead of time.  But if it means they Might Win A Nice Award then they'd be tripping over themselves trying to qualify!  People LOVE prizes.  Anyway it would make people appreciate older sports players more which I think is too uncommon.  People always on board with the young phenoms!  They don't care about the old mediocre players!  Doesn't seem right!
     Anyway what else is going on.  The point is I've reached an age in life where if I were in sports I'd be solidly over the hill.  That happened quickly.  Barely even appreciated when I was in my prime!  Oh well that's life.  Hey I got half a decade to think about retiring and/or qualifying for Old Timer Of The Year.  So it's not all bad.  Also then at the end of my sports career I get to RECALIBRATE.  Everyone loves a nice recalibration!  Hmm can't go back to playing sports, though.  I can choose from several things to do but playing professional sports is suddenly completely out of the question.  DAMNIT.  Hey at this rate I'll take my walk roughly 15 minutes from now.  What rate.  Rate I've been going at. Oh.  That makes sense.  What else is going on.  What I really should have done was get a Coke Zero Bottle before they phased out old flavor.  I can't rightly remember what it used to taste like, so how the Hell am I supposed to judge New Taste in relation to Old Taste?  I BLEW IT.
     Final paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  Maybe I can buy some old coke zero on amazon.  Gotta imagine that'll cost a pretty penny, though.  But presumably someone out there stock piled old coke zero to sell at jacked rates.  I would have done it but I didn't think of it!  But now that I do I could have made TENS OF DOLLARS presumably.  Oh well another money making scheme I missed out on.  What else is going on.  Been enjoying binging some The Simpsons the last day or two.  Really getting into it as opposed to just slightly positively tolerating it while I couldn't think of something better to do.  I like The Laughs it provides.  That's what I get out of it.  Then again it's a little too bright.  Colorwise.  I'm getting a headache looking at all these bright colors!  That sort of thing.  Anyway hey the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow because that's what I do every day!

-12:22 P.M. 

 

 

 

Thursday, September 16, 2021

What's That You're Reading

    Hello enemies.  And friends!  But mainly enemies.  I'm here to turn our relationship upside down and inside out!  Maybe one day we will be friends.  Maybe TODAY.  No time like the present!  TRUE STORY.  There is The Past and The Future but neither of them are exactly like The Present at all.  Also The Present is the best.  I'm always 100% more pot committed to The Present than The Past and The Future.  After the Present, The Past is best.  I know what happened in the past.  I dunno what's gonna happen in the future!  Who gives a fig about the future.  I like The Present and then The Past.  Wonderful.  Brought stuff to laundromat this morning.  I wanna say clothes.  Mostly clothes.  True story!  Anyway what else is going on in THE PRESENT.  This.  That's about it!
    
Oh well.  The last two days I've had delicious and nutritious meals and you're none the wiser!  It's my own private thing get used to it!  You may never hear all about my meals EVER AGAIN.  Man are you missing out!  And am I missing... IN!  Oh no am I missing?  Where have I gone!  When will someone find me.  Maybe never!  Had a nice cough drop last night and I was like man I'm getting a lot out of this for a minimal amount of calories.  Then I found out it was FIFTEEN CALORIES.  I thought it would be like 3 or 5.  But then while I was tasting it I had a sneaking suspicion it might be more.  Anyway it was delicious because CHERRY.  Because it lasted long.  And mostly because MENTHOL.  I used to drink these menthol cigarettes now menthol has been reintroduced to my palate?  DELICIOUS.  So I could have those now and again.  Worth it!  That's how I feel.
     What are the odds I never smoke another tobacco cigarette in life.  I'd say off the top of my head close to 50/50!  Maybe 40/60.  BUT WHICH WAY?  I'll Never Tell!  I'll tell eventually.  I'll forget that I was keeping it a secret and then let it slip maybe in a decade or two.  Now we play the waiting game.  Making very slow progress through Them Simpsons and That Twilight Zone.  On average I watch one every other day for the last 2 or 3 weeks.  Which is better than nothing!  I totally am either entertained slightly or bored mostly during those activities!  Simpsons are usually entertaining slightly!  Twilight Zone is usually bored mostly!  But they both GET THE JOB DONE.  Let's come up with some amusing website fodder.  Hmm.  Have you heard the good news about the wide world of sports?  It continues to exist!  Also I feel like in 1971 they played golf on the moon.  Now we have the wide solar system of sports!  I dunno if they played a ream game and kept score.  I think they just hit a ball that resembles a golf ball with something that resembles a golf club once.  Great now they're littering.  That golf ball is up there on the moon just collecting dust.  Moon Dust.  Hey I want some moon dust.  By which I mean cocaine.
    
What else is going on.  Let's be honest I'd rather have Actual Moon Dust than cocaine.  Hmm.  Gotta have SOME moon dust accumulated around.  Gotta imagine that .00000000000000000000000000000000001% of .0000000000000001% of the air around us In Earth Atmosphere is dust from moon somehow.  Seems plausible.  Now all we have to do is figure out how to get to the moon dust particles specifically.  And then combine it with other moon dust particles.  Then put together a nice moon rock by accumulating all the particles in the world and combining them.  WOW AN EARTH MOON ROCK?  THAT WE CAN RE-BREAK APART TO PUT IN A POWDER AND SNORT?  NOW WE'RE TALKING.  Gotta imagine moon will get you high.  Sure why not.  Is it possible The Mono killed the dinosaurs.  Sure anything is possible.  Dunno about that gonna have to look into that one.  Anything being possible and whatnot.  Could be the case!  Probably not though!
     Coffee after this paragraph.  Wonderful!  Got some pepsi left over for today but not as much as I'd like!  But still I could have easily had Zero left for today.  Oh no Zero that's the lowest number there is!  Not counting negative numbers.  And Counting Zero.  Hmm.  Coke Zero has a new taste?  I don't believe it.  Coke Zero?  FINE I GET THAT IT'S COKE BUT WHY ARE YOU CALLING ME A ZERO.  THAT SEEMS RUDE AND A HALF GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.  Dunno about that.  I guess if Anything Is Possible it's possible That Was Funny.  See?  This is why I'm not sure that anything is possible.  Because it's impossible that was amusing to any positive non-zero number extent.  I lost track of what I was talking about.  Numbers and possibilities.  And getting insulted by Coke Zero.  Oh right now it's all coming back to me.  How horrible.
     Great!  Maybe laundromat sells 2 liter bottles of soda.  DIET soda.  Gotta imagine they can put those washing machines to good use by mixing their own Colas.  DIET colas.  Also they can put them to good use by washing clothes in them.  WOW WHAT A MILLION DOLLAR IDEA!  It makes almost too much sense.  HMM is it legal to mix our own colas?  Because if it is Let's Get Cracking!  Great.  What else is going on.  Also I assume it's legal to make our own alcohol.  That's what hipsters do.  Beer-wise.  Yet it was ILLEGAL when alcohol was illegal!  WHERE'S THE LOGIC IN THAT?  Also what exactly is a hipster.  I know it usually involves a guy having a beard but beyond that not 100% sure what it means.  Also having beard isn't HIP.  Hip people are cleanly shaven.  I feel pretty strongly about this!  They've got it completely backwards with this terminology!
     Amazing.  Do I have a beard?  I haven't shaven in 3 or so months.  So you'd think I would, right?  Oh well no way of knowing.  I could look in the mirror!  But what if I'm wearing a mask at the time.  Then I did all that FOR NOTHIN.  Not worth the risk!  What else is going on.  Seventh paragraph.  HMM I just rubbed the lower fifth of my face and it felt like there's some hair there.  So there's that.  HEY I added Coke Zero to Super Market order.  We're gonna settle this once and for all!  Give me a coke zero.  Hey if you want a coke you're gonna have to assign a positive integer to it!  Humor.  What else is going on.  Baez seemed open to signing with Mets in the off season!  AMAZING.  He hits home runs.  I like it when that happens-- as long as he's on The Mets!  So there's that.  I could like it when that happens half the time if he's not on the Mets.  Maybe he's playing a team I dislike more than whatever team he's on.  Hmm.
    
Cool!  I don't like it when Lindor and Baez hit back to back in the lineup.  Look they're friends we can't have 2 friends in a row.  Too repetitive.  Pitcher would get too comfortable.  Gotta put 1 or 2 people between them.  True feeling I get!  Lineup needs BALANCE.  Two friends in a row IS UNBALANCED.  Maybe they're all friends.  Maybe there's some enemies.  I DON'T KNOW.  What else is going on.  What other sports should they be playing on the moon.  Off the top of my head Tennis might be fun.  They'd need to bring their own net, though.  No nets on the moon!  I HOPE not at least.  If there are tennis nets on the moon already then I'm not sure I'm comfortable with the implications of that fact.  What's the longest Tennis that ever happened.  Where they go back and forth with the ball and no one misses it for 10 hours.  Hmm Google LONGEST TENNIS EVER.  Hmm there were some results but I got bored before I could click on them.  Such is life.
    
Ninth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Surprising that no astronauts never developed Moon Madness and refused to get back on the rocket ship and wanted to stay on the moon.  I feel like that'd be a pretty common reaction to being on the moon.  Maybe that did happen and we just don't know about it.  Anyway.  I kind of want to develop moon madness.  It sounds like fun!  I may have to be on the moon to do it, though.  DAMNIT there's always a catch.  Was there ever a time in history where they caution people from staring at the moon.  I know you're not supposed to stare at sun!  But I feel like in ancient civilizations they were also like don't stare at moon either just to play it safe.  That'll give you Moon Madness for sure!  If you stare at it all night!  Well if you're staring at moon all night lets face it you may already have Moon Madness.  What else is going on.
    I dunno.  Gotta stare at something.  That's true.  What else is going on.  HMM Mayor election must be coming up soon.  I'll vote for that!  Well, I'll vote In that.  I'm not gonna cast a vote either in favor or not in favor of there being a mayor election soon.  There definitely will be!  They're not holding a vote on it at all!  Hmm seems like a scam.  Oh well such is life.  Maybe some nice PROPOSITIONS this year.  GOOGLE NY PROPOSITIONS 2021.  Hey there are propositions!  Well my interest is satisfied.  Moving on!  Is there a way I can vote to not recall California Governor Gavin Newsome?  I know he's already been rescued from recollection but I'd like to formally offer my support and approval as well.  Hmm.  If I lived in California but lived in New York could I vote in California elections?  If I'm a citizen of California I mean.  I dunno.  Some rich people live in multiple places.  And they truly do split the time evenly.  Can they vote in one state?  None?  TWO?  I'd look into this but I don't care.  I'll be back soon!

 

 

 

 

Oh You Don't Say

    Hey friends.  I'm back!  And it's been Roughly Soon so it's all going according to plan.  Gonna write Act II, take shower, Act III, Walk, Laundry, RECALIBRATE!!!  Recalibrate is arguably the most anticipated part of the day.  It rarely is That Great-- a positive experience, sure, but not the best part of the day by any means-- but for the first 40% of the day that's what I'm looking forward to!  Fascinating.  Looks like Newsom survived his Recalibration Election by a longslide!  A real landshot!  I imagine it's a Wonderful Life scenario and he runs around town saying Merry Christmas to Buildings.  Now that he sees what life would have been like without being recollected.  Sure.  I never saw that movie.  I feel like I get the gist of it though.  It's possible Jimmy Stewart also wishes merry Christmas to people but as far as I know it's mainly Buildings And Business Enterprises.  Go figure!
    
Cool.  Laundromat gave us a single Baby Sock 2-3 weeks ago when we went there last.  We kept it this entire time!  Then DIDN'T bring it into them today.  Gotta wonder what we're saving it for if we're not giving it back.  I'd ask my parents about it but that's their business not mine.  Just like how my life is my business not theirs.  In fact we are both incorporated with specific guidelines to forbid one another from participating or even engaging with each others' enterprise.  Go figure.  Been reading about people who get Covid 19 even though vaccinated and wearing masks all the time.  Uh oh.  That's what I DO.  I don't wanna get Covid anyway!  Doesn't seem fair.  And I hope we've established that as far as I'm concerned I'm going to continue assuming life is more or less fair even though there's so much evidence to the contrary.  It makes life EASIER to assume as much!  Hey today is Yom Kippur.  Hmm maybe I'll pray to God in a little bit.  And by Pray I just mean Open A Dialogue.  Not so much kissing his ass but just havin' a nice back and forth.  Well there's no back and forth.  A nice Forth.  There we go.
     Penpenultimate paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it.  The main thing is we're supposed to atone for our sins of previous year, I think.  Hmm.  Gonna have to think about which of my actions and thoughts were sinful.  Off the top of my head I can't distinguish between Good And Bad.  Well if I do it it must be good, right?  Otherwise why did I do it.  I don't wanna be bad!  Anyway what else is going on.  Hmm.  I didn't go OUT OF MY WAY to get Covid last year and prevent someone else from getting it.  That's how it works.  If you get it then that stops another person from getting it.  Either because There's A Finite Amount Of Covid so by it JUMPING to you it LEAVES someone else.  OR because it's a Final Destination scenario where Death/Fate has it in for Someone To Die Of Covid and if you do it then obviously Death/Fate is gonna let someone else go.  So basically me not getting covid seems like a real dick move either way it works!
     I STILL HAVE SEVEN HOURS TO GET COVID.  Oh boy oh boy what's the easiest way to get covid.  Interesting thought experiment.  If you wanted to get covid IMMEDIATELY-- as immediately as possible-- what exactly is your best course of action.  Figure out the nearest place of mostly unvaccinated and unmasked indoor people.  But WHICH PLACE is that!  Hmm gonna have to think about this one.  As a thought experiment!  I can't be wasting time Thinking About This One if I really wanted to do it.  Just pick a place and go there-- quick!  Anyway what else is going on.  OH WAIT THE HOSPITAL.  Duh!  People there DEFINITELY have it in certain wings. Oop but they won't just let me into people's hospital rooms.  I need a place where I could get inside!  Hmm that adds a new wrinkle to this equation.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  How long do bodies carry Covid after being dead.  Well that's no good anyway.  If I can't get into a hospital wing how am I gonna get into a buried person's casket at the cemetery.  WITH INGENUITY!  Yep maybe that checks out I dunno.  What else is going on.  Think I'm gonna take a bath today.  There's no reason not to!  Maybe there are a few small reasons not to.  Timewise, overall water use and effect on environment, ultimate personal cleansliness-- but these differences are SLIGHT.  So there's that.  Gettin REGULAR animal crackers for upcoming super market order AS WELL AS mini animal crackers.  Variety is the spice of life!  Also let's face it the mini animal crackers are better PLUS I can have them more often and theoretically more at once.  Okay let's face that sure I don't have a problem facing that.  I'll be back in a little bit. 

 

 

 

 

Get Out Of My House

    Hello neutrals.  Here to write another 5 paragraphs!  Then the Recalibration Process is one step closer to coming true.  Anyway.  Baby sock.  That's like that short story about baby shoes.  Except for the sock part.  And not the shoe part.  Who wrote that.  Was it Walt Whitman?  Better LTURQ.  It was attributed to Earnest Hemmingway but possible ERRONEOUSLY!  WOW!  I GET TO USE THE WORD ERRONEOUS?  This is shaping up to be a GREAT day.  Anyway if a story about baby shoes is great we can only imagine baby socks is even better!  Slightly better!  Maybe slightly worse!  Depends on your point of view I guess.  Here's the best six word story I could come up with-- BABY SHOES BABY SOCKS SIX WORDS.  Also it's kind of five words because I expertly use the same word twice.  Fascinating.  Anyway. 
    Cool.
  Without giving anything away, lunch will occur in roughly three and a half hours.  Slightly less!  But it'll probably still be GOING ON in three and a half hours.  Wonderful.  Delicious!  Almost as delicious as the bath I just took!  I don't think I swallowed any bathwater but lets be honest I probably swallowed about .00001% of bathwater accidentally.  If you're not swallowing SOME bathwater in your bath You're Doing It Wrong!  Gonna have to look into that one.  Also is it possible we can put Chlorine in Drinks?  I like how it tastes in pool water!  But I can't go around drinking pool water!  Too much piss in it!  So lets put chlorine in Water Sports Drinks.  There's no reason not to!  There might be SEVERAL very good reasons not to.  But I don't care it's worth it!  Is there anywhere in the world-- now or in history-- or maybe even in future-- where they bottle and sell urine.  My guess?  DEFINITELY.  Not human urine though.  That's probably not going on.  But gotta imagine there are countries where they sell urine.  Hmm but just HOW mass produced is it.  Sure there's country where you can get urine in Specialty Shops.  That goes without saying.  But are there places where it's made by a Derivative of The Coca Cola Corporation and whatnot.  My guess is NOT QUITE YET.
    
Wonderful.  After human urine what would be the urine most in demand.  RHINO URINE.  Off the top of my head.  That's the first thing that comes to mind.  Wait a second why would human urine be in demand at all.  DIY.  You urinate ALL THE TIME FOR FREE.  Yeah but you want someone else's urine.  I can see that.  If you want urine you probably are gonna want someone else's urine.  What else is going on.  In Jurassic Park III the kid uses T-Rex Pee to scare off other dinosaurs.  Because they assume the T-Rex must be near.  And peeing.  Gotta imagine that's an extension of Reality that exists In The Real World.  Use predator pee to scare off lesser predators.  I don't think JOE DANTE came up with it himself.  No way Joe Dante directed Jurassic Park III.  That'd be too Great A Recall.  Let's see the guy who did direct it.  JOE JOHNSTON.  See I knew it was a Joe.  I told you all along it was Definitely A Joe!
     Anyway what else is going on.  Also another reason to have T-Rex pee is that it's delicious!  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one!  Hey we reached the penultimate paragraph.  Maybe take a 20-30 minute break after Entry before taking walk.  And then go to laundromat directly after walk.  Then THE BEST PART OF THE DAY RECALIBRATION.  Also why don't they call Recall elections Recalibration Elections.  Because they're dumb?  Yep!  That's the only reason I can think of!  Directors don't come up with extraneous parts of the plot in movies.  Unless they're also the screenwriters.  I dunno.  Maybe sometimes Directors come up with extraneous parts of the screenplay without being CREDITED as a screenwriter.  I guess that could happen.  As far as I know!  So basically yes Joe Dante came up with parts of Jurassic Park III.  I think that's a relatively safe assumption.  Hey great what else ya got.
    
Last paragraph!  Wonderful.  HMM what to do with newly clean clothes from laundromat later today.  Normally I'ma prefer shirts on hangers.  But maybe leave em unhanged for a while until I'm through with CURRENTLY HANGED CLEAN SHIRTS.  So I don't get confused and wear newly cleaned shirts before slightly older cleaned shirts.  It's IMPORTANT and it's IMPORTANT I tell you about it.  That sort of thing!  Wonderful.  Mets are pretty much out of playoff contention.  They have 15 games left.  They pretty much need to win all of them!  I don't think they're gonna do that!  UNLESS... I got nothin'.  Either with Covid Spreading or Predator Pee.  Those are the only dumb things I can think of.  Anyway hey the entry is over.  I'll see you again tomorrow.  Or for the first time tomorrow.  We will be seeing each other again tomorrow but FOR TOMORROW IT WILL BE THE FIRST TIME.  Tomorrow specifically!  YEAH.

-1:25 P.M.

 

 

 

 

Wednesday, September 15, 2021

Sorry I Got Distracted

    Hey friends!  Here again to write some Dumb nonsense.  Well there's is Some Sense.  Dumb though we can't argue with.  The point is I ate two meals yesterday and guess what that's my business not yours.  I'm gonna do the same thing again today!  Deal with it!  The point is hey I got a new day to enjoy.  Played some ROCKSMITH yesterday.  I'm getting the hang of it!  Well, not really, but I'm getting the hang of ACCEPTING and STILL ENJOYING my mediocrity.  I haven't improved much over the last 2 weeks but boy oh boy am I growing Okay with not being great at it!  I like it when the sound of the guitar changes midsong!  We're talkin maybe a clean tone during the verse.  Then it changes on its own to distortion for the chorus!  I don't have to do a thing!  It knows to do it by itself!  WOW talk about convenience.  Now all I need to do is for them to play the guitar themselves.  Then I'm listening to music and having a blast and a half doing it!
     Cool.  I think the guy they hired to be the narrator is GREAT.  After practicing songs he has a dozen or two things he says based on how well you did like NICE PERFORMANCE or SUPERB JOB.  Not only are the phrases encouraging and great but this guy really seems like he knows what he's doing, encouraging me and whatnot, and I consider him not just a teacher but a friend!  Also, 92% accuracy and a longest streak of 72 correct note hits?  I'M KNOCKING THIS OUT OF THE PARK.  Anyway.  What else is there to talk about.  Movies!  TV!  Mets!  Meals are now out of the picture.  Maybe I should start taking Mets &/or Movies &/or TV out of the picture.  But then nothing remains.  The picture is completely blank.  There's No Life At All without those four things.  Oh wait Walks.  But what's to be said about walks anyway.  Nothing!  Also what I'm supposed to come up with Real Stuff to say?  What kind of website do you think you're reading?
    Hey what's in the news get a load of this Newsom survived his Recall Election.  Newsom, more like... GRUESOME.  See that's the kind of topical humour you're gonna get if we eliminate other topics I talk about.  Hmm let's come up with a Recall Joke.  Hey have you heard about this what's in the news California Governor Navin Gruesome survived his Recall Election.  I guess more people voted to not recall him than to recall him!  Also wouldn't recalling him be keeping him and NOT recalling him be getting rid of him.  YES.  We'd like to RE: CALL ON HIM TO BE OUR LEADER.  He's RECALLED.  Words are WRONG they're the opposite of what they should be.  Anyway.  Not enough soda to last me the next 2 days!  Not a fan!  That's not meal talk.  That's beverage talk.  Beverage talk is allowed because it's hilarious. 
    Norm Macdonald died.  I can't say for certain that I had Dirty Work on VHS but I can say I saw it my fair share of times! And liked it!  Also if I did have it on VHS it would have been for only a year or two but I still watched it my fair share of times!  Also SCREWED.  Probably not considered a great movie but it's a sleeper!  Lots of laughs!  In both of them.  So that's sad is my impression.  But I think he saw it coming because it's cancer.  So that gave him time to get his affairs in order which is good news if not for him then for his affairs.  The point is was Dirty Work truly inspired by AC/DC?  Dirty Deeds Done Dirt Cheap?  We can't say for sure but certainly that song shows up on the soundtrack of the movie one would imagine.  YEP IMDB SAYS AS MUCH.
    
Cool.  Coffee after this paragraph!  Have I Seen Norm Macdonald do stand up comedy?  Maybe!  I could probably look that up at some point today.  Sounds like a good use of my time.  I guess.  My guess is Norm is short for Norman.  I can't think of any other reasonable possibility.  Hmm seems like a pretty big coincidence that Norm Macdonald dies on THE EXACT SAME DAY that Newsom faced his recall election.  A little TOO coincidental I feel.  Dunno what that means!  Went into it KNOWING it wouldn't mean anything but I still felt like going through saying it anyway.  Norm Macdonald probably lived in California.  Better LTURQ.  Let's hope he had voted by mail.  Or in person.  Hours before he died.  He died in a hospital in Los Angeles.  So either he lived there or they airlifted him to Los Angeles for some reason.  Wonderful.  Also I assume your vote counts if you vote by mail but die before election day.  Right?  No reason it wouldn't.  Hmm.  What if I started chewing one piece of gum at a time instead of two.  I'd cut my gum consumption by roughly half!
    
I got coffee going on now.  True story.  Anyway.  Maybe Norm Macdonald voted for Larry Elder.  How much do we really know about Norm Macdonald.  Next to nothing!  He was probably friends with Kevin Pollack.  I feel like I saw Norm Macdonald on a podcast and it was probably Kevin Pollack's.  So that's the extent of what I know about Norm Macdonald.  He could be on his podcast without being his friend.  In fact the closer you are to Kevin Pollack, the less likely you are to be his friend!  He has disgusting personality traits!  That'd be my first guess.  What else is going on.  Kevin POLE-OCK.  Gotta imagine he was taunted with that RUDE RUDE slur time and again.  I'm not saying he SHOULD be.  Just that he WAS.  And/or IS.  IT'S WRONG THOUGH.  Let me make that abundantly clear. 
     Cool.  Kevin Pollack likes playing poker.  NORM liked playing poker.  It's a natural fit!  We can only speculate.  What else is going on.  I don't like the Caesar's Online Sportsbook commercials with JB Smoove and Patton Oswalt.  This is BAD NEWS they're participating in.  Gonna make compulsive gamblers!  They must have been paid a pretty penny though for this ad campaign is my guess.  So good for them but bad for the rest of us!  Unless they share their Earnings with the rest of us.  Are they doing that?  Gonna have to look into that one.  Maybe we need to sign up for Caesars to claim our portion of their earnings.  And it's in the form of a free 5 dollar bet.  WOW FIVE DOLLARS?  NOW WE'RE TALKING.  HERE PLEASE TAKE MY CREDIT CARD AND SOCIAL SECURITY NUMBERS.  Anyway.  Seventh paragraph!  And it's almost done!  Amazing.
     Cool!  Gonna give myself a solid D for the entry so far.  I was gonna say D/D+ but then I was like well let's not push it.  Let's be honest about it.  If we're not gonna be funny then at least we can be entertaining and if we're not gonna be funny or entertaining then we can at least be honest about it.  So THERE.  Cool!  Looks like California Democrats ain't the dummies we thought they were!  They solidly stood behind Democrat Governor  instead of allowing Republican to become Governor.  WELL DONE.  YOU KNOCKED THAT ONE OUT OF THE PARK.  Great performance!  That's another thing Virtual Rocksmith Teacher says.  Great Performance!  That's one of the things he says when you do a mediocre job.  He wants to be POSITIVE get off his back about it.  Basically it means Well could have been worse I guess.  Theoretically.  THEN AGAIN...  That would be too long for him to say.  They can't afford to pay him to say that entire phrase!  They'd go over budget!
     Ninth paragraph.  Wonderful.  I guess!  Every time there's an update of how far I am into the entry it's good news.  Because it's ALWAYS slightly more than it I was before.  NEVER is it slightly less.  I never finish the 8th paragraph and then go well you're not gonna believe this but suddenly it's THE SEVENTH paragraph.  So basically it's good news because we all look forward to the end.  Not of life.  Of the entry!  Maybe of life.  That's your problem!  Anyway.  I feel like both Dirty Work and Screwed probably have bad reputations.  But you'd be more likely to believe me if I say Dirty Work is good.  But Screwed is good, too!  Kind of slightly more, "PG," but they're both good nonetheless!  Also let's talk about it IT'S PRETTY SOLIDLY PG-13.  I dunno where this PG stuff is coming from.  The point is great just great.
     Last paragraph of the act!
  I don't believe it.  Is the Website PG.  This website I mean.  I dunno seems pretty PG-13 to me.  Moments of Extreme Stupidity.  Where's this moments stuff coming from.  I'd say It's PRETTY CONSTANT Extreme Stupidity.  What else is going on.  Unfortunately in my Dad's eyes all Norm Macdonald was was Billy Madison's Tall Friend.  I assume.  That's how I described him to my Dad because I assumed that'd be the main reference he'd get.  AND I WAS RIGHT.  Oh well could be worse.  My Dad could not know him at all!  And then where would we be!  Nowhere that's who.  If I wanted to I could PROBABLY figure out what to buy to make the Rocksmith Guitar Not Lag At All.  The right kind of TV Speakers.  And how to attach them.  I COULD do it.  I just have been ASSUMING I'm eternally too lazy to do it so why bother.  But now that I think about it.. it COULD be done.  Hmm.  I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

I'll Drink To That

    Theoretically!  Sure!  Here I am to write some more paragraphs.  Gonna be a blast and a half to Be Done With Them.  So we got that to look forward to.  I've decided to drink soda at will even if it means I'll have to go a day plus without any.  Easier than trying to ration.  Much easier!  Also more immediately delicious!  ORANGE flavored soda?  Now you've got my attention!  I feel like when I was a kid we'd have Diet Coke.  That's it.  Any bonus flavor was like HOLY SHIT WHAT A TREAT A MIX-EM-UP FLAVOR.  The point is when I Was a kid I was easily enthused about things.  And lets face it Orange might have been the biggest treat of all.  Hmm.  We might have had Sprite or Ginger Ale in stock.  I feel my Dad used to drink Sprite when he sued to drink soda.  And my Mom may have used to drink ginger ale!  EITHER WAY THIS IS FASCINATING WEBSITE DOFFER.
    
Cool.  Hmm.  Cool.  At this point I don't know if I'm ever gonna try New Coke Zero.  I feel like the window has closed for me to be a trendsetter either in favor of it or not in favor of it.  Also are influencers ever ANTI something.  They try to get a sponsorship from something and they're denied and they're like I'LL MAKE YA PAY ONE WAY OR ANOTHER.  Gotta imagine influencers have to be Anti-Things once in a while just to have some balance to Their Web Show.  Might as well make those negative reviews Out Of Spite.  Seems the most logical way to do it all things considered.  The point is Patton Oswalt and JB Smoove must be getting paid A FORTUNE to be influencers in the Caesar's SPortsbook App TV Commercial To Remember.  We know we're supposed to remember it because of the credibility lent by Patton Oswalt and JB Smoove.  THEY'VE GOT MY ATTENTION!  Amazing.
     Third paragraph of the act!  BOTH FROM THE START AND FROM THE FINISH.  Really makes ya think.  Presumably.  Maybe today I finally take that shower I've been anticipating taking for the last week.  I feel like today has a good shot.  THEN AGAIN...  Wonderful.  Haven't worn my non-bathrobe robe or my pajamas in a long time.  Since Pandemic Quarantine was semi-lifted!  DANGIT.  I bet they'd fit much more loosely on account of being less weight than I Was at Onset of Pandemic Semi-Quarantine Lifted.  Semi-pandemic.  That sort of thing.  I remember when people started getting shots I was like hmm we reached 550,000 America Deaths that's pretty bad.  Very too bad we reached that.  Now I realize oh right it keeps going up more and more at a pretty steady pace.  GOTCHA.  So that's life.  For most of us.  For some of us it's death!  I don't like the sound of that!
    
Anyway.  Is it possible Norm Macdonald got COVID and is giving us this bogus cancer story to throw us off track?  Well no not really.  I don't see immediately what the reasons for that would be.  Then again what do I know.  I haven't given too much thought to it, maybe if I think about it some more I'll figure out Possible Reasons.  What else is going on.  He was ASHAMED for some reason of getting/dying from Covid.  But WHY.  He wasn't taking proper precautions.  He was embarrassed or he thought it would lose him fans.  Hmm.  I'm gonna get to the bottom of this IF IT KILLS ME.  Wait, no.  Not that last part.  It doesn't seem worth it if I end up dead!  Jeez.  What else.  Gotta go get blood work done next week.  Fun stuff!  Nice prick in my arm.  Who doesn't get a blast and a half out of that.  What?  Most people.  That sounds inaccurate.
    
Cool!  Acupuncture is an onomatopoeia.  ACK, YOU PUNCTURE?  That's the sound you make when it's about to happen to you.  And you need to confirm what's about to happen to you.  And it's the sound in the form of words.  That sort of thing.  Next is shower.  I can look forward to that.  Why shouldn't I.  Even if I don't want it to happen it helps to look forward to it.  So I REMEMBER to do it in the first place.  If I don't look forward to it, in 15 minutes I'll forget completely to do it!  I dunno about that.  Not sure.  Oh well.  I can't wait to see the next comedian to participate in Caesar's Sportsbook App Ad Campaign.  I bet it's someone else who I respect!  MAN these commercials are gonna be a blast and a half to enjoy.  I might as well use this product since it wouldn't be fair to get all this entertainment out of these commercials for free!  It's not a product.  It's a SERVICE.  Kind of a product.  More of a service!  Hmm.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

Who's Doing What Now

    Hey here we are with more.  Took a shower just now!  A blast and a half.  I was totally done with it in a fraction of the time it takes for bath!  I need to just lay around WAITING for water to accumulate.  I don't have time to wait for water to accumulate!  Maybe I do but I still would rather not!  Do some people just sit in baths.  I think that's what children do.  But there's no reason we as adults cannot sit in baths.  Less risk of us drowning!  Unless we breathe with our butts.  Then it's exactly the same amount of risk of drowning.  VERY HIGH.  I feel like for a while in the mid-term recent past I would sit in bath until water accumulates some and THEN lie down.  But solidly be sitting for a couple of minutes.  I think that's reasonable  VERY REASONABLE.
    
Coffee time.  Wonderful!  Dunno what kind of stuff I'm gonna watch today.  Maybe some Dirty Work or Screwed in honor of that guy who died.  If they're available to me!  Even if they are maybe not.  I watch HORROR movies that's just the kind of guy I am these days.  Anyway I've been THINKING about meals a lot this morning and early afternoon.  But no explicit talk about it!  Does this count as talking about it?  NO!  As long as you don't know the specific meals I may or may not be having on a day to day basis then I'm doing my job.  Hmm seems I could accomplish that by Not Writing At All Each Day.  That WOULD be doing my job yes.  But then I'd.. uh... hmm.  I've given myself a lot to think about.  THAT'S why I need to write each day.  I give myself a lot to think about in the process of writing!  WOW THINGS TO THINK ABOUT?  Now I've Got My Attention!
    
Cool.  Mostly the titles.  Think about the titles all day.  Dunno if I'm happy with these titles is mainly the recurring thought.  Also it's easier to remember the titles than things in the entry.  That explains that!  What else is going on.  Sure I'll get some acupuncture.  I'm just concerned I'll get hooked just by doing it once.  I'm gonna want needles in my face ALL the time.  It's a gateway drug!  But it's just a gateway to the same drug.  But I'd want to do it A LOT.  It's a gateway between Doing It Once and Doing It A Lot.  Anyway sure I'd watch The Gate II.  I haven't seen it in 25 years!  I'd watch The Gate I, too, but that I've seen more recently!  Hmm did I watch The Gate II when I was seven AND that was the last time I saw it?  Yes!  Very possibly.  The Gate Is a horror movie franchise.  Gate To Hell or something.  Not really Hell as in Heaven And Hell.  I don't think so at least.  Just some sort of alternate dimension where Evil And Demons live.  Wonderful.
     I mean I guess evil and demons live in OUR dimension.  But this alternate dimension they're REALLY running amuck.  What else is going on.  Finished orange soda this morning.  Finished snapple!  Now I'm down to 3/4ths of a 2 liter bottle of diet pepsi AND My Mom has most of a Diet Dr Pepper that I could drink.  She won't like it!  But thems the breaks!  If she didn't want me to drink it she'd have explicitly told me not to.  She has told me not to drink her Dr Pepper many times in the past.  Yeah but she hasn't said it TODAY.  NOT YET AT LEAST.  At least not to me.  She might have said it at some point when I was not around.  Maybe!  Can't say for sure she didn't!  Anyway what else is going on.  Apparently Norm Macdonald wrote a book.  A memoir book?  Or some sort of half truth memoir book.  And half LIES.  Better LTURQ.  I might wanna read this sucker!  HMM I can't tell the proportion between Real And Falsehoods in this book but either way it appears it should be read by me.
     In the meantime though let's write a paragraph.  To be read by you!  Probably shouldn't be but apparently that's the circumstance we've reached right now.  Oh well that's life!  Anyway let's wrap this up.  Gonna take a walk roughly 10 minutes from right now.  That's the estimation I'm making and I'm pretty comfortable with it all things considered.  Then again sooner would be even greater.  And later would be a huge disappointment.  So there's that.  Maybe Norm Macdonald would have voted to recall Newsom.  I think he'd pick someone other than LARRY ELDER to replace him, though!  Based on my limited understanding of Norm Macdonald, California, Governor Nominations, And People's Names.  Wait a second his name really is exactly Larry Elder?  I was SURE I was oversimplifying it and/or getting a couple of syllables completely wrong.  Oh well.  Now I know the name Larry Elder. For permanent. That's life.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:55 P.M.

 

 

 

Tuesday, September 14, 2021

I Have Something Better To Do

    Hello friends.  I'm back here again.  For some reason I suppose.  Wearing a nice purple shirt.  I don't wear this shirt that often!  It's kind of a dumb shirt but as a mix-em-up I don't mind wearing a dumb shirt today.  Drinking some SNAPPLE.  Diet snapple!  Oh no is that Meal Talk.  I'm gonna say NO.  Beverage talk!  Beverage talk is NOT off limits.  If I couldn't talk about beverages I'm drinking you'd have no CONTEXT for the things I'm saying.  WHY did I capitalize context.  It serves it's purpose BETTER without being emphasized!  Great.  What kind of fillums can I watch today.  I watched a film of the Mets losing 7-0 yesterday!  Well I watched the majority of it!  Well I watched roughly half of it!  I took BREAKS because I needed to refresh myself.  Anyway.  I get very upset every time the umpire makes the wrong call for a ball or strike and that call hurts the Mets.  THIS ISN'T FAIR.  THIS IS A MICROCHASM OF LIFE.  LIFE ISN'T FAIR.  THIS IS TERRIBLE NEWS.
     Anyway.
  Hey my parents were somewhere this morning too when I woke up.  Maybe a surgery check up.  Reunion.  They celebrate the fun they had 24 hours ago with a Catching Up Session.  Either way they're home now.  Which is good news!  They could have EASILY died in a car accident either to there or away from there.  Or perhaps while there.  We can't rule out completely that they rode go karts for fun for an hour or two.  Hmm I don't think I've ever droven a go kart.  Seems like a pretty big oversight.  I've never driven anything!  EXCEPT FOR A CRUISIN' USA.  Okay great CALM DOWN.   Drove go karts for fun.  Is there another reason to drive go karts.  Well sure for transportation!  That's just obvious.  POSSIBLE I drove a bumper car once or twice.  I MAY have a sense memory of being in a bumper car.  It's possible I just got in the car for fun and then got out before any bumping could happen. 
     Cool!  Who the hell came up with bumper cars.  HEY you know what people would get a kick out of?  DRIVING INTO EACH OTHER.  What a visionary!  Anyway.  I feel like 50% of people in bumper cars go out of the way to hit people while 50% of people in bumper cars kind of are trying to just drive around and avoid people.  That's a good way to measure your personality.  In bumper cars do you drive at people or away from people?  Hmm.  I think I'm a Drive Around People.  LOOK I'm gonna get bumped in the natural course of things, so why force it?  Let the bumping COME TO YOU.  That sort of thing.  Are there SOMEWHERE bumper cars where there's room for passengers.  They figure they can cut the lines wait time in half by having people sit behind the driver of the bumper car.  HEY you're still gonna get Just As Bumped!  And now you don't even have to drive you can just sit back and enjoy yourself!
     Sure.  Sign me up for some Bumper Bikes.  Now there's greater steaks!  You get bumped you're gonna fall down and hurt yourself.  But on the other hand, you bump someone else, they're gonna fall down and hurt themselves.  So it evens out in the end.  You suffer some but you also CAUSE some suffering!  So in the end it's a fair deal.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  Do you need to balance on Motorcycle as much as you would on regular 2 wheel bike?  Or is it easier.  Because I can't balance on bike.  But MAYBE just MAYBE I can balance on a Motorized Bike.  Seems more sturdy!  What else is going on.  Also I don't get the point of bikes.  Let's all just ride Tricycles.  Why make things more complicated than they need to be?  Doesn't check out!  So there's that.
     Coffee after this paragraph!  Wonderful.  Why not have four wheels.  Let's really play it safe!  I call it A CAR.  Anyway what else is going on.  Are there non-motorized car-like four wheel vehicles?  My guess?  Sure why not I don't care.  Anyway.  I HAVE used Exercise Bike a couple dozen times in my life.  Not a huge fan!  Feels like a lot of work AND apparently it doesn't burn off that many calories compared to other stuff.  MORE WORK and LESS RESULTS?  Sign me up for NOT doing that.  However it feels like a lot of work!  So maybe there are more results!  That makes sense more than wherever I got the idea that the opposite was the case.  Either way I forget what's going on.  Neighborhood Exercise Room is opening back up!  But I'm not going there.  Gotta play it safe!  Also that would involve physical strenuous work.  Gotta play it safe and not perform physical strenuous work!
     I was just downstairs pouring my coffee and I almost idly asked my Mom so did you do Go Karts today?  True story!  I didn't, though.  Which is a relief because that'd sound pretty dumb!  And all things being equal I'd rather not sound dumb.  Then why do I write these entries.  I said All Things Being Equal.  All things ARE NOT EQUAL in reality.  So with the reality equation of inequality I am unfortunately forced to write these dumb entries.  I don't like it either but that's life!  Cool.  Got ZOOM appointment with psychiatrist this afternoon.  I can live with that!  It'll ideally last 5 minutes.  Because I got THINGS to do.  One would imagine.  Maybe we can talk about my feelings about the shirt I'm wearing today.  We don't' talk about my feelings at all.  Seems like kind of a rip off!
     Now I have no one to talk to about things!  NO ONE AND NO WHERE.  Seventh paragraph.  Jeez.  My Mom has indeed finished The Wire.  Now I'm encouraging her to re-watch other shows that I'd like to hear here and there throughout the day.  I've suggested The Sopranos and she balked at that.  Next I'm gonna try to trick her into watching DEADWOOD.  That's even better than The Sopranos!  Man oh man I'd listen to some Deadwood Dialogue here and there over the course of several days.  I'm getting hot and bothered just thinking about it!  Anyway.  Looking forward to ending Act I.  Always a key part of my day.  Hey in a way I'm more than halfway done with the entry which is main chore for the day.  Paragraphwise I'm exactly halfway through.  HOWEVER in terms of writing 10 paragraph acts I'm 100% done!  From here on it's no more than 5 paragraph acts!  AMAZING.
    
Cool!  No Meal Talk yet today.  So far so good!  I'm gettin' there.  There being a whole day without specific meal talk.  The journey of a thousand steps begins with a single step!  Hmm that's a pretty short journey.  A thousand steps?  That's gotta be like half a mile.  Better LTURQ.  HOLY SHIT Internet says a mile is 2,000 steps.  I AM A GENIUS IT TURNS OUT.  I always SUSPECTED I might be a genius and now here's the proof for one and all to see.  Anyway that takes some OOMPH away from the joke.  I lost enthusiasm for A Journey Of A Thousand Steps and became more invested in whether my estimations were accurate.  Anyway journey of a thousand steps that's a laugh and a half.  It amused me!  That's halfway there all things considered.  What else is going on.  How about Bumper Walking.  Get some protective gear on and run into people.  WELL WHICH ONE IS IT, WALKING OR RUNNING.  That's up to you!  Go at whatever speed YOU feel comfortable with!
     Ninth paragraph!  I guess!  Had a nice nighttime walk last night.  Good to mix things up!  Maybe I should do it again tonight!  I probably won't but maybe I should have!  In the future.  My life could be better if I Do but I Probably Won't.  So there's that.  Anyway was watching DRAFT DAY recently.  Seen it a few times.  This guy is THE WORST GENERAL MANAGER I'VE EVER SEEN.  He makes NONSENSE trades and Draft Pick Decisions.  Not even like Fun Taking Chances Or Something.  Just TERRIBLE strategy.  So basically that's a very upsetting movie.  Also before I watched it I thought it was gonna be about A Windy Day.  Now I get that it's about a Sports Draft.  Oh well live and learn.  Maybe it could also have been about an essay that hasn't been edited and finalized yet.  But that didn't occur to me at the time.  Still though I guess it MIGHT be able to be about that.  No I saw it and it has nothing to do with essays.  OR DOES IT.
     Tenth paragraph!
  Final paragraph of the act!  I'd write a five paragraph essay.  Give me a topic and I'll knock that out of the park.  Ya know what I'm at a point in my student career where five paragraphs is too short!  I'll write a 12 paragraph essay.  Still short all things being equal but a lot more meaty than a 5 paragrapher.  No I won't.  I can imagine Finishing the essay and getting something out of it.  Putting the finishing touches on a 12 paragraph essay, the topic of which you decided, that sounds like fun!  The bulk of the essay doesn't sound fun though!  And even LESS fun is the research and critical thinking involved for PRE-ESSAY.  Ugh now I don't wanna do this at all.  PLEASE CALL IT OFF.  Anyway.  Hey it's time to take a break.  I'll be back in a little bit!

 

 

It's This

    Sure it is.  I'm back here with some more stuff to write.  Well, I've currently got Nothing to write.  But stuff Will Be Written, of this we can be sure.  Well depends on what your definition of, "Stuff," is.  I guess.  That's my Bill Clinton moment!  He wonders what definitions mean.  That's how that goes.  Definitions mean What A Word Means.  He was wondering what a word means.  What the definition WAS.  What the definition of Is Was.  Sure that makes sense.  I follow myself, that's for sure.  And that's halfway there all things being equal.  Maybe ge... WAIT NO.  I was about to speculate on what I may or may not get for dinner.  I feel like I stopped myself in time.  It's a Halfswing.  A baseball halfswing!  OH NO UMPIRE IS SAYING I SWANG AND TALKED ABOUT MEALS?  THIS IS HARDLY FAIR.  JUST LIKE LIFE.  GOD DAMNIT I WAS REALLY COUNTING ON THE IDEA OF LIFE BEING MORE OR LESS FAIR.  This is TERRIBLE news.
     Sure it is.
  What else is going on.  Then again Life Not Being Fair works to the advantage of some people.  No reason I can't be one of those people!  It'll take some getting used to living an unfairly privileged life but ya know what I Think I Have It In Me!  So that's on way my life can shake out, sure.  I hope not.  But that's life I guess.  Anyway.  Act II --> Shower --> Walk --> Act III.  Then re-calibrate.  Or maybe it's just Calibrate.  I dunno if I've done any prior calibrating today.  THIS is calibrating.  Right?  Sure it is.  I Guess.  I'm not sure what words mean exactly, we've already touched on that sad fact a little bit last paragraph.  Anyway.  Halfway into September more or less.  I'm gonna say LESS.  But still pretty close all things considered.  I guess.  Today's a Friday right?  Tuesday?  WHAT THE HELL?
    
Anyway.  Two's Day.  Romantic Comedy about really ugly people.  HEY FINALLY A MOVIE THAT SPEAKS TO ME.  They're, "Two's."  Out of Ten.  People don't like them as much as other people re: Romance because they look weird.  At 2 you don't just look unattractive.  You look WEIRD at 2.  Something specific is wrong with you somehow.  So you got that going for you.  The point is if you're a two you have your PICK OF ONES.  AND there's a 50/50 chance you can Net a 2 yourself!  Gotta look at the bright side of things.  Most things are bright on any side.  Really depends on where the light is hitting them EXTERNALLY, not on any aspect of the object within itself!  I dunno gonna have to look into that one.  A shiny new penny.  I feel like we should develop a system in financiality that accepts coins and bills from the future as legal tender.  Someone comes back in time with Future Pennies?  Sure why not accept that!  No reason to deny that guy using Future Pennies AS LONG AS THEY'RE THE SAME MORE OR LESS. 
     Hmm.  Okay!  Better get cracking on that future soon because pennies could be phased out ANY MOMENT NOW.  Right?  Gotta imagine by 20 years from now No More Pennies.  I don't feel like this is too controversial a fact!  Although I'm sure they'll MAKE IT controversial somehow.  HEY PENNIES ARE PART OF OUR HERITAGE YOU GET RID OF PENNIES YOU'RE GETTING RID OF US.  Anyway.  Bad news for beggars, I can say that!  WAIT NO MAYBE GOOD NEWS.  Presumably with less pennies you MAY have more other coins?  But then again people are DESPERATE to get rid of pennies and not other coins.  Overall I feel this will HURT beggars more than it will help them. W ell great now I feel everyone will be on board with it.  If it HURTS needy and desperate people then surely we as a society can implement that change pretty quickly!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Got plenty of time to take a nice shower or bath before Walk.  Presumably.  This paragraph's length notwithstanding.  Hmm.  Also pennies are more or less useless HERE but in other areas of the world pennies can be worthwhile.  But do they use American currency in those areas of the world.  I don't know!  I don't think anyone knows for sure!  That's just the kind of thing you can't check out!  I'm sure they have their own currency most places but they MAY ACCEPT American currency.  I don't see why they wouldn't!  It's the best currency out there!  USA USA USA.  Anyway what else is going on.  Also what kind of person who isn't desperate and needy TAKES a penny.  Take a penny leave a penny.  Are there people who are there to buy beef jerky, HAVE money on them, and are just like ya know what I'm gonna take that eight cents.  If not ME then SOME OTHER JERK so WHY NOT ME.  Anyway great.  I'll be back a little bit later.

 

 

 

Now We're Back To Nothing

    Hey!  Time to wrap this up.  Got snapple going.  Gonna have coffee going starting after this paragraph.  All in all it's a pretty good period of 20-45 minutes writing these 5 paragraphs.  Could it be less?  Probably not!  Could it be more?  Probably not!  So what you're trying to tell me is it'll probably take within 20 and 45 minutes.  YES EXACTLY YOU CRACKED THE CODE.  I took a bath again!  I keep telling myself I'm gonna take a shower but then I'm always like well taking a bath is EASIER.  I don't have to STAND or anything!  Also I don't need to spend the effort to have Water Drip Down Me to get in every nook and cranny.  In bath water gets everywhere by itself!  Less work for me!  Hmm PHYSIOLOGICALLY exactly how many nooks and crannies do I actually have in my body.  I can think of a few off the top of my head!  Well I can think of one main one at least.
    
Great!  Got coffee going just as I predicted.  Also in the shower the water is coming off the top of my head.  That's the general point I've been trying to make entirely!  What else is going on.  So far I haven't talked about meals at all this entry.  Very close to succeeding entirely!  Look I have been thinking about meals.  Maybe not as much as if I were talking about them.  Also it's all very positive thinking.  Almost all Looking Forward and very little Uncertainty In Good Stuff To Get and/or How Much I Anticipate Enjoying It.  It's pretty much working out to all of our advantages, not talking about it!  Especially Yours!  You don't care at all!  But also Especially MINE.  Now it's more Special and if meals aren't special then we're doing dieting wrong.  Wait no I'm gonna have to look into that one.  UH OH is this paragraph meal talk?  No!  I mean YES.  But then again NO.  But lets be honest YES.  But tangibly NO.  But in essence OF COURSE.  But I want to believe NO.  Let's move on.
    Sure!  Gotta look over my medication inventory to see if I need to re-up with anything with physiatrist.  My guess?  Nope!  I got plenty thanks for asking.  Also could I start selling Klonopins to people?  Sure I could but I WON'T.  I don't break the law that egregiously, thanks for asking!  I might break the law by selling them to people but it would be TOO EGREGIOUS to incite speculation about whether I'm doing it IN PUBLIC.  On THE PUBLIC INTERNET.  Especially if I AM doing it.  Which I am NOT.  But I would say that either way.  But I'm NOT.  I dunno.  I'm sure you believe me.  This guy doesn't have it in him to Interact With People Enough to be a drug dealer.  Also-- the Hand Offs.  I'm not athletic enough to multi task Handing Drugs To Someone While Walking so that there's no obvious drug interaction for people looking.  I don't have soft enough hands!  Then again hands are pretty soft.  That's how they feel... to themselves... huh?
    
Penultimate paragraph.  THE FIRST DAY OF FALL IS IN EIGHT DAYS.  Okay jeez calm down.  Anyway.  HEY I just cracked this code-- it's called Fall because leaves FALL DOWN during it.  And it's called Spring because plants and flowers are SPRINGING UP.  Now all we need to do is figure out Summer and Winter and I've got all the seasons down!  Amazing.  GOOGLE WHAT DOES SUMMER MEAN.  ALSO, GOOGLE, I'LL LOOK UP WINTER AFTER THIS ONE, DON'T THINK I'M JUST INTERESTED IN SUMMER.  OK ANYWAY GOOGLE GOGoogle doesn't know.  GOOGLE DOESN'T KNOW SHIT.  Google WHAT'S SHIT.  Anyway what else is going on.  I forget when I started this Act and was speculating on how long it might take.  I know what time it is now.  I WILL know what time it is when it's done.  But I won't be able to say for sure how long it ended up taking!  DAMNIT.
    
Great.  I dunno.  Maybe write a worthwhile final paragraph.  I feel like The Worthwhile Final Paragraph is pretty rare.  I'm already pretty committed to just typing dumbness with the goal to just end things as relatively quickly as possible.  Hmm So Far NOT A GREAT START.  Here's a time period I know-- I'll have about half an hour between Entry Ending and Next Walk.  These activities are SO IMPORTANT I had to capitalize the first letter of each word of them.  Now you know I mean business with these Activities!  I mean business getting through these activities.  After these activities I have to do Zoom Appointment and then FINALLY it's time to re-calibrate and see what I'm gonna do with my Free The Rest Of The Day.  There's another activity we know is important.  I guess!  Hey I'm done here.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-2:10 P.M.

 

 

 

Monday, September 13, 2021

Are You Sure You Want To Read This

    Hey!   Lets start the entry off right.  Write some stuff worthwhile.  I dunno I don't remember signing up for this.  20 Paragraphs of Worthwhile a day?  That doesn't sound possible.  No one could accomplish that, let alone lil' ol' me!  Maybe Stephen King could.  He's the master of horror!  One would imagine.  I read a stephen King book when I was 10.  I also read Jurassic Park which I feel may or may not have been written by Stephen king.  Has Stephen King written a Choose Your Own Adventure?  My guess?  No of course not.  But then again if I know Stephen King as well as I think I do he sometimes likes to Mix It Up.  And what's more of a Mix-em-Up than a Chose That Own Adventure.  Anyway.  Did Stephen King write The Shining.  Or did The Shining WRITE HIM.
    
Cool!  My parents aren't home right now.  Mom is having eye surgery on 2nd eye.  Dad is there for support.  Tangible support!  Driving her around and whatnot.  Not just emotional support.  In fact not emotional support at all.  Gotta imagine he wishes her the worst and is going to try to make things less comfortable for her all things considered.  Anyway.  Maybe I can get contact lenses at some point!  That sounds great.  I'll be able to see without my glasses on.  YEP that's exactly how it works!  You heard it here first.  Mr. Smiles had a 3 homerun game last night!  Now that's what I like to see!  Even if I had to see the third homerun this morning because it was past my bedtime last night!  Even if I had to wear my glasses to see it!  Anyway I think Lindor should wear some nerd glasses.  I think they'd give him CHARACTER. 
     Jeez.  OKAY FINE what else is going on.  I think Stephen King is so scary because people are scared to read books.  Not just because they're boring but because the written word is horrifying.  WHAT THE HELL LOOK AT THESE WORDS.  I'M TERRIFIED OF IT AND WHATNOT.  I dunno what that means.  It makes sense to me!  Probably not to you.  But boy oh boy does it make sense to me!  I DON'T LIKE THESE WORDS BETTER KEEP READING.  OH NO THE FOLLOWING WORDS ARE EVEN MORE UPSETTING.  BUT I CAN'T STOP NOW I'M POT COMMITTED TO THIS SENTENCE AND oh no OH NO THE NEXT WORDS ARE EVEN WORSE.  That sort of thing.  That may or may not be why I don't read as much as I should!  It's either that or no that's nonsense I'm just too lazy to read.  I read TV and movies.  Got captions on!  Listening to audio is too difficult to me!  I need a BACK UP in case I get tired of listening halfway through some dialogue. 
     Cool.  Hmm.  Three paragraphs out of 20 down.  Sounds like 15% to me!  Hmm sounds like 85% is left.  Makes sense.  A little TOO MUCH sense.  Wait no.  Appropriate amount of sense.  There we go.  Look have I been thinking about recent and upcoming meals a bit?  Yes.  But I think I am going to make an effort not just for today but for all time to stop writing about meals.  I could say okay I'll devote a few sentences to it each entry and that's it.  But, NO!  I need a clean break!  No meal talk!  This doesn't count as meal talk.  Meal talk is SPECIFICALLY saying what I have for meals.  This is META MEAL talk.  Hmm I'd like to eat a META MEAL.  That sounds delicious AND/OR nutritious!  Wait no just delicious.  It sounds not nutritious at all!  Kinda feels like I'd get Zero nutrients from a Meta Meal.  Then again if we change how I'm imagining a meta meal a bit, move some pieces around, sure a Meta Meal could potentially have nutrients.
    
Amazing.  Coffee after this paragraph!  Delicious.  Oh no is coffee a meal.  I dunno.  Could be!  But that's not speculating on meal.  It's just a quick notification.  So there's that.  Anyway.  There's a few books from NYU that I found interesting that every year or two I try to start reading them but never make any progress!  In fact each time I start I make less progress than the time before!  Start at page zero.  Maybe one year I make it 20 pages.  Then two years from that I pick it up again and have to start at Ground Zero and only make is seven pages.  Either way INTERESTING BOOKS.  Not novels.  Other kinds of books!  That sort of thing.  Either way gotta imagine I'll get around to reading them at some point.  Anyway.  Half of these books are from the class or two I never finished and/or failed.  So it'd be nice to get something out of those classes.  Oh well too late now. 
    
I suppose.  Parents just came back!  Coffee time, too!  WHAT AN UPDATE TWO FOR TWO.  HEY I'm back.  My Mom's surgery went okay.  But she was too AWAKE and/or AWARE during surgery.  Very upsetting!  For her!  Not for me!  I wasn't impacted by it at all.  Maybe transitorily through her.  She told me about it!  I didn't have much sympathy for her because I can't relate!  I've never had conscious surgery per my understanding.  Sixth paragraph!  And only LIMITED discussion about meals.  Hmm.  Meals huh.  Can't wait.  I know I'm not supposed to talk about it but let's just be honest Meals Are Great.  Ugh.  My Dad starts teaching his fall semester tonight!  It effects me because he's tellin me he doesn't want me to take walk during Class Time in case my Mom needs something.  WORKS FOR ME!  It effects my final walk of the day but I can take that LATER after his class which is an interesting mix-em-up I might get a kick out of!
     So there's that.  Hmm a mix em up?  An INTERESTING mix em up?  That's what life is all about!  Presumably.  I don't know what I'm basing that on.  Could be accurate, though!  Seventh paragraph.  I'm allowed to keep a running tally of what paragraph we're up to and share that explicitly with you.  I'm allowed to do anything I want!  That's life!  I haven't had surgery in a while.  Kind of jealous!  I dunno if I've ever had surgery.  Now that I think about it, I don't think I've had surgery!  I've had procedures I suppose.  No surgery!  DAMNIT.  If I had to choose an organ to be removed which one would be good.  Maybe some sort of kidney.  I feel I'd get a blast and a half without one of my kidneys.  We got two kidneys right.  That's why it's Kidneys.  YEP WE GOT TWO.  I feel that's wasteful!  We only really need one!  We should be having ELECTIVE surgeries to remove a kidney for SIMPLICITY'S SAKE.
    Okay Fine CALM DOWN.  Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  I also feel we should be getting organ implants.  I could use a second liver!  Why not it couldn't hurt!  Hmm gotta figure out where to get a second liver from.  You guys know anyone interested in selling a liver?  Anyway.  I feel like in some countries it's legal to sell your organs if you're down on your luck.  Why not!  If that's what you wanna do, go for it!  Then again it would widen the life quality gap between rich and poor.  Because rich will be buying poor's organs.  And that's not great for society OVER ALL.  On a person by person basis it might make sense but OVERALL it just feels WRONG.  What else is going on.  Oh.  Right.  I got MEALS coming up today.  No spoilers!  But let's just say I will have A LUNCH AND A DINNER.
     Oh no that could be meal talk all by itself.  I could have just BLOWN IT completely!  let's say I didn't.  Let's say if I stop RIGHT NOW the meal talk will have successfully been kept to a minimum!  Wonderful.  Ninth paragraph!  I could always trade livers to make money.  Sell my liver for some cash, buy a worse liver.  Now I still have a liver AND I made a nice profit!  Or the other way.  Trade up for a better liver.  I've given myself a lot to think about!  The point is what else.  Also I've been talking about liver because I've drank my fair share over my lifetime but gotta imagine some better lungs would be even better!  I haven't smoked tobacco cigarette in two and a half years but STILL I feel like lungs could be more valuable to me overall.  Hmm this is tough it's a real Sophie's Choice.  Except for The Name Part.  It's a real Michael's Choice.  That makes more sense.  Because that's my name!  GREAT now people googling, "Michael," in search for Me On The Internet will find this website.  I hate it when that happens!
     Last paragraph of the act.  Wonderful.  I don't have a problem at all with that!  Maybe I do.  I forget what I was talking about so I can't say for sure.  Normally last walk of day is walk in the park.  Can't do that tonight!  It'll be after dark!  It's be FUN and GREAT to take an after dark walk in the park but it'd be too dark to see my way around!  I can do it AFTER SUNSET but before COMPLETE SUNSET-- that's a blast and a half-- but for today I'd have to start after complete sunset.  Just can't be done!  OH NO.  Anyway that's life I guess!  Part of life at least!  A very small part.  Even smaller if we're counting All Of Our Lives.  It's a small part of my life and odds are not a part of your lives at all!  Not even a little bit!  Anyway great.  I'll be back in a little bit!

 

 

 

Scroll Down For More

    Hey!  Here to write some more paragraphs.  As of the last sentence I am officially over halfway through the entry!  Amazing.  Looking forward to taking a nice shower after this Act.  No bath!  Shower time!  MC Shower Time!  Not a bad MC name.  MC Shower.  I don't know what it means but it feels right to me.  What does MC stand for. Oh.  Emcee.  It doesn't stand for anything it's just an alternate spelling.  Well then what does Emcee stand for.  Nothing.  It's just a word.  Fascinating.  OH WAIT.  "A Master of Ceremonies."  MC.  Emcee.  It was an abbreviation BEFORE it was a word.  Interesting!  VERY Interesting.  I dunno about VERY.  I DO know about very It's VERY.  This is a hill I'm willing to die on.  Seems kind of extreme.  But either way I Said It So It Must Be True!
     Cool.  Nice evening walk tonight!  It might not be in the park but an after dark walk is a blat and a half wherever you take it!  This is when The Fun Stuff Happens.  After dark.  I dunno what that means.  Raccoons running around.  That's the most fun thing I can imagine that specifically happens after dark in my neighborhood.  Interesting I'd look at some raccoons from afar.  What else is going on.  I feel like stores are closed by 8 PM in my neighborhood.  I don't get it!  I feel like people will want to get products and services after 8 PM!  And if not people then at least Raccoons.  Whatever.  I think rodents get a bad rap.  Doesn't seem right they're the most hated animal subgenres there are.  Just because they're diseased and/or will bite you and/or will invade your Home Territory and/or are creepy in Sight And Sound.  Once you take all that out of the equation they're just like any other animal LIVE AND LET LIVE.
     That's a good slogan!  It's EXACTLY what I was gonna do anyway!  So there's that.  Just put in phone call to Endocrinologist about refilling a prescription.  Hmm.  That's not a Life Update I give you every day.  Although I do frequently have to maneuver medications and whatnot.  Getting them, GIVING THEM... wait no not that last part.  Well I give them to myself.  Gotta get them in the house.  Then there's the process of giving them to myself!  Sure I guess that checks out pretty well.  No it doesn't.  Oh well what are ya gonna do.  Whatever.  Hmm.  Finish this act.  Take a shower.  Write next act.  Take a walk.  RECALIBRATE FROM THERE.  Okay jeez recalibrate fine just stop yelling at myself!  I deserve better than to be constantly Yelled At By Myself.  What else is going on.  Nice regular nighttime Mets game tonight.  No WEST COAST 10:00 PM Night game.  A regular 7:00 game!  I'd say an Evening Game but evening would be a 6:40 game.  7:00 is a night game!  EVERYONE KNOWS 7 PM is the cutoff between evening and night.  Then again I DUNNO there's MANY other ways to look at it.
    
Fascinating.  VERY fascinating.  Jeez.  Maybe sundown is cutoff.  Complete sundown!  Regular sundown while it gets dark for 20 or 30 minutes is part of evening.  Only when it's completely dark has Night Come Into Play.  Hmm.  This is dumb.  Too dumb!  I'm not happy with myself but oh well what are ya gonna do.  That's life!    UNFORTUNATELY.  LOOK the later your night goes the later you can have an evening.  If you're goin' deep into the A.M.'s then sure why can't 8:00 or 9:00 be Evening.  It CAN that's why it can't!  Anyway.  If the Mets go 14-4 over their last 18 games they can probably make the playoffs!  That's totally reasonable.  Just DO IT.  Win a lot more than you lose over JUST A PRETTY SHORT TIME PERIOD how hard is that what are you idiots or something?  My feeling is they may be idiots because they DO lose half the time.  Seems dumb to me but that's just my perspective as a fan!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Look I get you wanna lose sometimes just to keep things fair and interesting.  But keep it in perspective!  HMM as of now you don't know what I have coming up for Meals. Or what I had for Meals since last entry.  It feels ODD to keep this information from you.  Then again I kind of like it!  It should be private!  If I'm sharing meals with you then it loses some of it's specialness.  I don't know why exactly.  It's just something I should be enjoying privately to fully appreciate!  Hmm I've given myself a lot to think about.  No I haven't.  It wasn't really any thing worth thinking about at all, and I've already went above and beyond how much I should think about it by Thinking About It At All.  So there's that.  Anyway time to take a shower!

 

 

 

You Made It To The End

    Hey!  I got coffee going on.  That's fun.  It's a real, "Blast," and, "A Half!"  The exclamation mark is theoretically for the entire sentence and not just the mini-phrase, "A Half."  Wait.  No.  Maybe it's the other way around.  Either way, whichever way it's intended, there's only one way to write it correctly grammarwise.  So basically who cares is the point that's just the way it is!  I know what meals I'm having for today.  Keeping it to myself!  Got a good idea of he order I'm gonna have them in!  Playing that pretty close to the vest, too.  FINE Let's just say I'm going to have the smaller meal for lunch and the bigger meal for dinner... AS OF NOW.  DAMNIT I had the entire entry without giving a Specific Detail about meals.  Per my recollection.  This BROKE that streak.  Oh well now it's time for a new streak to start.
     Speaking of the word STREAK the bigger meal for today is based around STEAK.
  Okay I GUESS NOW'S the time for the new Streak to start.  What else is going on.  Hmm I could probably Beat The System and take my Dad's math class for free!  I could just sit off camera his entire lesson.  I can trick him into giving me all the homeworks and tests for myself.  I can't get him to GRADE THEM or individually instruct me in anyway because he's not getting paid to do that so why would he.  So I can get half of what I wanna get out of the class for free.  Well if it's only halfway why bother at all.  I guess at this point I'm pot committed to taking the course myself.  Wait, no, that's not right!  It's too late now!  Probably.  I think if I was already a Patient at Kingsborough Community College I could sneak in there for the week probably.  But first I'd need to enroll in the college completely and THEN get into this class late.  Can't be done!  Probably could be done!  I don't feel like it though!
     Penpenultimate paragraph.  Wonderful!  Gonna have some fun watching The Television Set after walk.  That's my prediction for the result of my re-calibration.  Mostly watching the Television Set!  See what kind of dumb stuff shows up on there.  I've got semi-control over what dumb stuff shows up!  I theoretically have Total Control but I'm being influenced by outside forces as well as what's specifically available to me on Live TV and/or Streamers.  It's already narrowed down for me AND I'm unconsciously shaped from external ways that could determine what I pick specifically from that narrowed down selection.  Oh no how terrible.  What else is going on.  No break between finishing entry and walk!  I could take a small break but I wouldn't be able to accomplish much in it so why bother.  Save that small amount of time for after walk where it can be a supplemental amount of time to a longer period of time which could theoretically accomplish even more with the augmented time.  Huh.
    
Yeah!  Might as well talk more about meal today.  At least the one you already got some inside information on.  Steak is part of STEAK AND EGGS.  I will have HALF OF IT for one meal today.  Eggs are scrambled.  Potato side is Frenched Fries-- first time I'm having them in months!  It's all Very Exciting and I can't wait for it to manifest itself in reality.  Well now not as much as 10 minutes ago.  It was SPECIAL while it was just for me.  Now WHO CARES.  Might as well throw it out in the trash it's worthless to me.  Then again I'd be spoiling the trash can by serving it Full Meals.  STEAK Full Meals at that.  Once you start feeding trash can full meals it's gonna want full meals all the time.  And I can't AFFORD that.  And even if I could I wouldn't WANT to.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  Are trash cans only what they're called if they're some sort of metal bin.  If you have a wooden or plastic trash bin is that Not A Trash Can?  We all know soda cans are aluminum.  Do we.  I don't know if I Know That.  Anyway one more paragraph.
     The point is what else is going on.  I'm NOT going to tell you what the other meal is for today.  Just so I could look back at this entry and still think I kept SOMETHING to myself.  Because in the end it doesn't matter that I lasted until the very end to tell you about the first meal.  I still said it!  So just so this entry can go down as A Half Win the other meal is Unknown for now!  Although if you look at the clues you can figure it out.  What clues.  Hmm I dunno that's for you to figure out!  What else is going on.  I dunno!  That's why I asked you!  Anyway.  I don't like it when the Mets play the Yankees at home but 25-50% of the crowd is Yankee Fans.  THIS IS WHERE WE LIVE.  HOW DARE YOU INVADE OUR HOME SPACE WITH YOUR DUMB YANKEE FAN NONSENSE.  Also are Yankee fans dumb?  I don't know-- I'm just raising that question.  All fans are dumb.  All people are dumb!  Except for Oh I Don't Know Tampa Bay Devil Rays and their fans.  Hmm good team name it rhymes.  Wow.  I'll see ya later!

-1:32 P.M. 

 

 

Sunday, September 12, 2021

Sounds Good To Me

    Hey friends.  Back here again!  That happens roughly every day.  I took roughly one day off when my routine changed from Quarantine Routine to Non Quarantine Routine.  That's life I guess!  I guess I can look forward to taking another day off when Quarantine Starts Up Again!  Oh no that might happen.  I don't want that to happen!  I like walking around outside.  Ya never know what you're gonna get!  Anyway.  I feel like when I first started taking walks I seriously considered okay but don't walk NEAR other people.  Someone starts walking in your general direction YOU CROSS THE STREET.  I don't do that at all anymore!  I don't think about being near other people one bit!  Maybe I'm wrong but that's how I feel.  I still think about going INSIDE places.  But in terms of walking near other walking people it just happens without me being concerned about it.
     Oh no!  I'm gonna die!  Wait a second that checks out.  I AM gonna die.  Oh well I've lived a long and fulfilling life one would imagine.  The good news is I have pastrami sandwich lined up for lunch.  Delicious!  I will potentially be using Old White Bread.  It's healthy because I can't immediately see any mold!  Not yesterday at least.  Maybe by today I can see mold.  Oh well if the mold is less than a day old then it's still fine to eat.  I feel like I heard that somewhere.  If the mold is old and you've kept it cold go ahead and eat it.  Also I've kept bread loaf cold in fridge.  That's an important part of this equation!  Plus it rhymes with mold and old!  Amazing.  OH RIGHT I'm writing this entry.  Just spaced out for a second.  Changed light bulb in bathroom a few days ago!  We're talkin I did it with my Dad supervising.  We're talkin I probably coulda did it myself!  Was simple enough.  Some screwing and/or unscrewing.  Steppin' on a stool.  I feel like the last half dozen times I've had to do chores which involve stepping on stools I Was Half Drunk.  And I remember being like well this isn't WISE of me and I feel kinda uneasy on this stool and doing stuff where I can fall but then again I THINK I GOT THIS.  Anyway when I'm not drunk I REALLY got this.  I'll stand on a stool and reach up all day long if I have to!
     Anyway.  Wonderful!  Coffee Time is slowly creeping up.  I can pour that sucker after next paragraph.  Sometimes it's before paragraph 5, sometimes after!  It's totally up to me!  No one's gonna say shit either way!  Had a nice small black and white cookie for breakfast.  Delicious!  I like the part where it's icing.  Black icing?  White icing?  I'm happy with both!  Also the part where it's cookie?  LOVE IT!  I'm on board with these cookies 100%!  Also keep them black and whites in the fridge!  Slightly harder and more cold then leaving them out!  ALSO THEY LAST LONGER YOU IDIOTS why aren't you putting your cookies in the fridge?  You don't buy cookies all the time?  BUT WHAT DO YOU EAT FOR BREAKFAST?  Your story isn't adding up at all and I'm starting to get the sense you're some sort of idiot.  Anyway.  Time I can relax diet because I don't wanna lose more weight is slowly creeping up!  You know what that means!  I can eat black and whites for breakfast BUT 2-3 TIMES THE AMOUNT.  HOLY SHIT that's a lot of cookie!  By which I mean Carlos Carrasco.  Great now this page is gonna show up when people google Carlos Carassco.  I don't need that kind of hassle!
     Maybe I do.  Gotta have some sort of hassle!  That's life.  A collection of hassles!  Still have 2/3rds of a chocolate chip pancake.  I could make a strange meal of combining that with a cup of noodles.  Sounds fairly reasonable.  I don't particularly like having thirds of pancakes for breakfast.  SOMETIMES I do but not ALL THE TIME.  I'd like it better as part of a meal!  And cup of noodles is the only thing I can think of that would go with it appropriately SIZE-WISE.  So there's that.  Then again I gotta eat this pastrami!  So you can see the kind of predicament I'm in.  Maybe you can't.  You have no imagination.  I said it pretty explicitly and you STILL can't see it.  In which case I get the sense you're some sort of idiot.  The good news is I'm going to save coffee until after next paragraph.
    Got something to look forward to!  A BREAKFAST BEVERAGE.  I feel like if I were having an adult sleep over, in the morning they'd offer me breakfast and coffee.  Like a family sleepover or something.  Maybe not a friend.  I could get used to this!  I'll eat a FULL breakfast for a special occasion.  Some EGGS and toast and some ORANGED JUICE.  DELICIOUS!  What's going on.  Where am I.  Oh, right.  HMM when I am done with diet maybe I can make myself eggs and toast on occasion for breakfast!  I was imagining just Big Cookies!  Also frozen breakfast sandwiches which is reasonable.  But at this point I know how to make eggs and it doesn't take so long!  I CAN DO IT.  FRESH BREAKFASTS.  I don't believe it.  HMM would I need a third component.  Eggs, toast, and...  HMM.  Eggs and toast might just have to do it themselves!  DOES ORANGED JUICE COUNT AS THIRD COMPONENT.  Yes.  Yes it does!  I'm gonna take a MicroBreak to get coffee!  WAIT A SECOND HOW ABOUT JUST A BAGEL FOR BREAKFAST.  OH MY GOD THERE'S MANY WONDERFUL BREAKFASTS.
    Look sure I'm not saying anything new here.  You know what things people have for breakfast!  But it's FUN for ME.  Imagining it all for myself!  Also I could have Single Pancakes or Frenched Toast.  SO MANY OPTIONS.  I'm going crazy just thinking about it.  Overstimulated!  I don't know how to turn off my excitement!  Oh right that switch in the back of my head.  Okay now I'm feeling better.  What else is going on.  Sixth paragraph!  Got coffee just like I said I would.  Mets still hanging in there.  Odds are very low they make playoffs but it's statistically relatively possible.  The good news is they're playing better which is a blast and a half to watch even if they lose.  Then again SOMETIMES THEY DO POORLY IN INDIVIDUAL AT BATS.  I don't know how I feel about that.  Pete Alonso STRIKES OUT?!?!  But he's supposed to be GOOD.  Hit some homeruns!  WHAT THE HELL IS THIS BULLSHIT.  That's how I feel.  
     Also Lindor may be a superstar but he just LOOKS like a Good Scrappy Player To Me.  I like that generally!  Scrappy players are fun and I imagine him to be THE BEST SCRAPPIEST PLAYER THERE IS.  But he's getting paid SUPERSTAR money and his stats are that he should perform at Superstar levels!  He just LOOKS SCRAPPY.  Which is good in some respects.  Anyway what else is going on.  No reason superstars can't be scrappy.  TRUE but Scrappy Players can't be superstars.  I dunno if those two ideas can co-exist.  Sure they can.  I just wrote them back to back.  In the same paragraph!  They co-exist pretty explicitly.  Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe have frozen potato pancake as side with pastrami sandwich.  I can get on board with that!  I can get on board with lots of things.  Not surfboard though.  That seems too difficult!
     I feel like I owned a surfboard for the pool?  I guess it's not a surfboard.  You can't surf in swimming pool... right?  But I guess it was a board you're supposed to stand on top of and balance.  So that's a surf board!  You can Surf In Place, right?  Without waves?  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.  The point is I had that but I don't remember utilizing it.  Fascinating.  I'd go swimming one day, sure.  When there's no pandemic afoot.  What else is going on.  Eighth paragraph!  Wonderful.  I got that going for me!  I DID IN FACT watch a few #TalesFromTheCryptTheSummerToRememberSavingsEvent yesterday.  I'd watch more today if I have to!  HOWEVER I feel my first primary directive is to watch a film or two on The Shutter Screaming Service that I haven't seen yet.  Potentially GOOD ENOUGH movies!
     Ninth paragraph.  Jeez.  Mets lost yesterday but they put together some quality at bats and what more can you ask for.  Them to win.  Yeah but... uh... sure.  Anyway.  I don't like watching baseball games on FOX.  They're INSANE/CORRUPT/REPUBLICAN.  I'm basing this on Fox News.  FOX is related to Fox News.  The word FOX is a dead giveaway!  Dead giveaway.  That's where they auction off corpses.  Is that a thing.  I'd buy a corpse if I could.  Gotta imagine once you own a corpse anything you do with the corpse in the privacy of your own home is your own business and no one else's.  Hmm.  If you own a corpse you can dress up like them and kill people and people will think it's the corpse.  That's one way to live your life I guess.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it!  Wonderful.  As of now decent chance I take a walk after Act II instead of a shower.  That's just the way today's schedule seems to work out ideally!  Get off my back about it is the point!  Anyway.  Javy Baez continuing to do good for The Mets.  I hope he sticks with the Mets for upcoming seasons.  I don't think he will because he presumably doesn't like the fans because they're jerks to him and then he had to apologize to THEM.  So why would he re-up with that.  But I think he's a good player and balances out the team!  Also he's friends with Lindor and will bring out the superstar in him.  And I like the idea of FRIENDS playing baseball and bringing out the superstars in each other!  Oh well that's life I guess.  Is it?  I dunno.  It's someone's life.  Either mine or theirs.  I forget what I was talking about exactly so it's hard for me to say for sure Whose Life It Is.  Yeah.  I'll be back in a little bit.   

 

 

 

 

Either Way I Don't Care

    Did I just spend 10 paragraphs talking about breakfasts... the same stuff I talked about breakfasts 20 times before in the past year?  YES YES I DID.  It's FUN because you get to imagine how dumb my life must be while you read this.  Then return to your own Not-Quite-As-Dumb life!  So I make you feel good about yourself I hope.  Then it's all worthwhile.  Also it's worthwhile anyway.  I waste my own time.  And what is time for if not to be wasted.  Anyway probably gonna take a shower after act II, then walk, then act III!  Wonderful.  Hmm.  Maybe your life is even DUMBER than mine.  And seeing someone approach your dumbness makes you feel good.  I like the sound of that!  Because now YOU'VE got more problems than me.  Suddenly my life seems great.  Thanks for that!
     Cool.  Shower today!  I think I took a shower yesterday.  Could have been a bath!  Who knows at this point.  Who cares at this point!  No one even cared at THAT point.  Surely don't care at THIS point!  Anyway.  Dunno what kind of Delicious I'll have for dinner.  Right now thinking many a delicious omelet.  Meat omelet would be delicious but Lox omelet would be healthier!  And there'd be presumably more mercury so I'd have that going for me, too!  Anyway.  Just changed light bulb!  Think there's mercury in there!  So hopefully I'm getting my weekly dose of mercury between those two things.  Anyway.  Changing lightbulbs is a part of life where being short does NOT pay off.  Just like all other parts of life now that I think about it!  Except for being trapped in a room and you can crawl through the air duct vents to get out.  That's the only thing off the top of my head that's good.
     What else is going on.  Hmm.  I guess in those Japanese Hotels where you sleep in a drawer, you can reserve a Smaller Drawer.  Which is presumably a fraction of the price!  That's good.  Also I'm sure those Drawer Hotels are cheaper for those tightly strapped for cash, but I'd GO OUT OF MY WAY to sleep in a drawer!  Seems like something everyone should experience at least once.  That's how I feel.  Being dead in casket is like sleeping in a drawer.  Yeah but you never really get to enjoy it.  Unless you have feelings when you're dead.  Which I hope you don't.  Because things are gonna get PRETTY BORING for ya.  Anyway what else is going on.  HMM.  That's a good reason to be a corpse propped up in someone's home.  Just in case you can still experience things, there's STUFF going on that engages you.  Instead of lying in casket for hundreds of years.  You may not be able to participate in life but at least you can see SOMETHIN' going on!
     Something to consider.  No it isn't.  Fine I don't want to argue you.  Sure I do.  But I can't.  You have no avenue of engaging me in argument!  Oh well that's life.  Gonna have coffee #2 with act #3 later on.  Gonna be great!  I guess!  In first third of the day when I write entry I usually feel like hey I'd enjoy some video games.  Either rocksmith or call of duty.  I NEVER feel like it after the entry is done, though!  I guess during entry I feel like video game would be a nice break but then during break I feel like video game would be boring.  I like a break where I don't have to do anything.  And pressing buttons is doing things!  Too much work.  Also if I remember anything about where I left off at Call Of Duty it's that... uh.. I DON'T remember anything about where I left off at Call Of Duty.  I know I was playing as Americans in current Mission.  Which is too much pressure!  I'm playing as Russians fighting Germans no stakes at all!  I could care less if I die because Russians are chumps.  America?  Now the pressure's on to stay alive and keep my America Army Friends alive too!
     Too much pressure!  What else is going on.  Gonna enjoy nice shower today.  That's how I feel!  Then again a nice bath is not without its charms.  I dunno.  Gotta write another paragraph before I can move on with my life to next step.  Reach the next Checkpoint so to speak.  Once I'm done with this paragraph and am up to taking a cleansing experience I can Save The Game And Quit.  And do something else!  Like Shut Down for several hours.  Hmm that doesn't sound good at all.  What else is going on.  It sounds kind of good!  But MOSTLY not good.  Cool.  Better look up Japanese Drawer Hotels.  Make sure I didn't just dream it.  Or see it in a TV show as a spoof but its not real.  CAPSULE Hotels they're called.  And I looked at the picture--  Not quite a drawer but pretty close!  Actually, ya know what?  QUITE A DRAWER.  Just a VERY BIG Drawer.  Wow now we're talking THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS!  It is still solidly a drawer but there's space to roll around and stuff?  SIGN ME UP!  I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

 

Fine Have It Your Way

    Hey!  Gonna write a One Paragraph Unit and then give myself coffee to augment the next Four Paragraph Unit for myself.  So I got that going for me!  Anyway I took a bath.  It was okay!  Pretty much what I expected!  Gotta be conscious of not letting it fill up too much because there's lint and stuff accumulating near the top of the bath tub.  And if the water reaches that level then it will TAKE OVER THE LINT and then when I empty the bathtub the lint will go down the drain.  Causing a clog!  What do you mean I could wipe off the lint from the bathtub before taking the bath.  That sounds like work and I am VERY suspicious of doing anything that resembles work.  Just doesn't feel right!  Also not sure where all this lint is coming from.  SOCKS is my best guess.
     Thinking about having a delicious omelet tonight.  Half of one, at least.  Delicious.  The amount of delicious is inversely proportional to the size of omelet!  Half the omelet is twice as delicious.  This is NOT a hard and fast rule.  JUST FOR TONIGHT.  Maybe stretching into tomorrow for 2nd half of omelet.  But DON'T take this to be a general rule because you'll just get burned.  What else is going on.  Ya know what?  Maybe have a meat omelet!  Western Omelet if it's Diner.  Some other meat if it's Deli.  I Don't KNOW for sure.  What else is going on.  Got coffee going on just as I predicted.  I'm some sort of soothsayer.  Which means something presumably.  Dunno what a Sooth is.  But this guy is saying it, there's no question!  Anyway.  I have a memory of making this joke 6 years ago.  Which is ODD.  Because when I have memories of making jokes USUALLY it's from within the last year or two.  This memory is goin' back aways!  Also by this joke I mean just using the word Soothsayer and then being like What's up with that?!  That's considered a joke now!
    Sorry.  You heard it here first.  Three paragraphs to go.  Delicious!  HEY there was a period of time I would have donuts from Dunkin Donuts for breakfast.  That sounds, well, Delicious!  But I don't want to have to go into a building.  You know what lives in building!  Why it's only Covid Pandemic!  I'm trying to steer clear of that.  For Health Safety reasons!  That's me at least.  Anyway.  How come no one has taken sole responsibility for a vaccine.  Seems like there'd be someone who wants attention and praise.  Even if it was a team of people!  That TEAM could announce responsibility!  Sure they'd have to share appreciation with the other team members but any adoration is better than nothing!  That's been my experience.  What else.  I think saving coffee for paragraph II is really paying off.  Yep.
     Anyway.  I dunno.  I guess.  What kind of stuff am I gonna watch when this entry is done.  Maybe some sort of I DON'T KNOW the same crap as yesterday generally?  I mean it'll be SLIGHTLY different crap.  But more or less the same crap.  It's Things On TV!  Every day that's what I watch.  Never stuff out the window.  HEY that's a good idea for caskets.  Equip em with a TV JUST IN CASE.  Then you can enjoy eternity in a casket because TV.  OH NO YOU WON'T BE ABLE TO CHANGE THE CHANNEL.  How about every six months it cycles through the channels.  So you get a taste automatically of the different kind of stuff that's out there.  Over time.  A long time for us.  But for you it'll be like the blink of an eye!  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Gotta imagine at some point TV becomes obsolete.  I don't like the sound of that!  Because whatever replaces TV has got to be EVEN WORSE.
    
Oh no.  Last paragraph!  Oh yes.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Finished the coffee.  I'm okay with that!  I got what I needed to get out of it and now its time to move on with my life.  The Met game tonight is on ESPN.  I dunno if I have a big problem with The ESPN Corporation.  I think they're owned by Disney.  Which I think has some stuff against it but off the top of my head isn't as bad.  So there's that.  What else is So There's That.  Maybe watch a #TheTalesFromTheCryptTheSummerToRememberSavingsEvent.  I'm FAMILIAR with all these episodes.  I know what to expect!  They won't let me down!  OH NO TV in Casket is a real TALES TO THE CRYPT.  Wonderful.  Also when you're buried in cemetery can you communicate psychically with your neighbors.  Gotta imagine over thousands of years you'd develop that skill.  You've got nothing else to do!  Anyway I'm done here.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-2:32 P.M.

 

 

 

 

Saturday, September 11, 2021

This Is A Combination Of Words

    Hello friends.  Another day!  Another dollar.  Not sure what that means.  I don't want another dollar!  I want the same dollar as last time.  At least that dollar I know for sure is legal tender!  Anyway I'm wearing tight shirt today.  Because I didn't realize how tight it would be.  Slightly tight!  I thought it would be Barely Tight.  Now I feel like an idiot!  Anyway I checked my weight and I'm down another 1.5 pounds in the last 9 days!  And you all doubted me!  And you were right to doubt me for 95% of things but NOT THIS.  Shows how much you know!  Got delicious bison burger for lunch.  With the jalepeno peppers!  So sure I got stuff to look forward to.  I could have delicious super market pasta for dinner!  Or get something with my Dad.  DELICIOUS stuff to look forward to.  That's my favorite genre of things to look forward to!  Delicious Stuff!
     Also FILLUMS.  Anyway I watched that horror movie yesterday and it was scary and good!  I don't know why it got mediocre reviews.  Probably because the critics are some sort of idiot!  I was thoroughly SPOOKED on occasion while watching the fillum.  Great!  And it was fun dividing it into 3-4 sessions of watching it.  Without pandemic quarantine I would have seen this in the Major Motion Picture Theaters To Remember and I'd have gotten bored.  Breaks, though?  I'm on board with Breaks!  Give me a break, that's what I say!  LOOK did one of my Freedom Chip Pancakes from last night have very little Freedom (Chocolate) chips?  YES but the other one had the normal amount so you gotta look at the positive side of things.  The pancake is half full.  With chocolate chips.  On average.  Hmm.
    
Cool!  At what point did we start letting France off the hook for being against the Iraq War.  I know we don't say Freedom Fries ANYMORE.  So how long did that last?  Oh.  Never?  Or maybe one week at the most in the most dumb parts of the country?  Gotta imagine there's a town out there that's like The Village and they're completely out of the loop and they're still calling french fries Freedom Fries.  Wow scary.  I haven't had Frenched Fries in a long time!  Probably not since April!  Which is strange because they're delicious.  Anyway.  Today is 9/11.  I remember that!  I was explicitly told to do so!  20 years.  Long time.  Short time!  Intermediate time.  Let's agree on that.  Split the difference!  It's been an intermediate amount of time.  I can't full recall how big a deal the World Trade Center was before 9/11.  I mean I know For A Pair Of Buildings it was PRETTY well known and important.  Maybe the most well known 20th century buildings in the world, and if not then in the top 5!  But then again they were buildings.  Office buildings.  Good For Them.
    
So there's that.  Anyway.  I know they were the TALLEST buildings.  Or at least IN THE CONVERSATION.  Wow a Tall Building?  NOW YOU'VE GOT MY ATTENTION.  Anyway I'm gonna re-up with soda and then after next paragraph start-up with coffee!  I was just talking to my Dad about it and I may have been to the world trade center at some point when I was very young!  We were there for some reason.  My Dad is hazy on the details!  But we went to a diner nearby.  That's what he remembers.  Hmm that's one thing my Dad and I have in common.  We're both more prone to Remember The Diner Nearby than Whatever Place Was Primary Place We Went To.  Was it primary place we went to?  What did we do just TOUR the office building?  I dunno.  My Dad is hazy about it I told you!  Hmm a diner nearby?  I'd go to a diner RIGHT NOW.  I don't even CARE what it's nearby or not.  THEN AGAIN being nearby a place is GREAT ATMOSPHERE.
    
Whatever.  What else is going on.  My mom was halfway through season III of That Wire last night.  Gotta imagine she's into season IV by now.  Wonderful.  Also World Trade Center has Brother Buildings.  Why!  I don't know.  Also I assume it's a Twix Commercial Situation.  Each building is actually the same but there's a fake competition about which one is better because they're supposedly slightly different.  Oh well I guess we'll never know.  What we do know for sure is that when standing the WTC was as delicious as a Twix.  I'd eat a Twix.  Especially in a diner.  Nearby Ground Zero.  I feel like it's not Ground Zero anymore.  Now it's just where Freedom Tower is.  What's the new building there called.  Freedom Something.  "One World Trade Center."  That's dumb.  Should be called The Freedom Tower!  HMM it USED to be called The Freedom Tower.  Now it's called One World Trade Center.  Well we've learnt a lot these past few sentences haven't we.
     HEY
these mini animal crackers would make a GREAT terribly unhealthy cereal.  It just occurred to me!  Alright now I get royalties once THEY realize it'd be a good selling cereal.  Now we play the waiting game!  Anyway.  Got coffee now!  I don't believe it!  Think I'd rather have Super market meal for dinner tonight.  Right now thinking about Wide Al Fredo!  Wonderful.  How deep into the entry are we.  5 paragraphs out of 20.  Hmm this is a real head scratcher.  I wanna say approximately 25% in off the top of my head!  Fascinating.  Gotta imagine there's a Tower Of Terror either in Old WTC or New one.  That's the main tourist attraction!  Wait a second the REAL Tower Of Terror, I don't think they ACTUALLY drop you several floors quickly in an elevator.  It's all A FAKE MOTION SIMULATOR.  So I GUESS they could have that in the WTC.  But they could have that anywhere!  Yeah but in the WTC it REALLY SELLS the idea you're in an elevator.  Also it takes 10 minutes for you to drop completely because it's just that tall!
     Anyway so there's that.  How big is each floor.  15 feet?  Times 100?  That's 1500 Feet.  That's NOTHIN'.  I thought these buildings were supposed to be high up in the air?  1500 feet?  You can practically SEE THE GROUND from what height.  Not impressed!  Looks like floors were around 13 feet.  Not impressed!  Sorry.  Oh well what else is going on.  Seventh paragraph!  SOLIDLY in Average BMI territory.  Impressed!  Very impressed with myself.  So the tally is Not Impressed with WTC Floors, Yes Impressed with Personal BMI Territory.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  I feel like if you were doing weekly polls of George W Bush his approval rating would have spiked YET AGAIN these last few weeks.  People have learned NOTHING.  Dunno about that.  Maybe it's just me.  And when I say that I DON'T mean maybe it's just me who spiked his approval for George W Bush.  I mean maybe it's just me that I would even think of that.  Also now that I think about it In Most Situations It Is Just Me.
     Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  What's the new Best Building.  I feel like people must have been underwhelmed by new WTC Building because no one talks about it.  Maybe THE SEATTLE SPACE NEEDLE.  I dunno about that.  Is that just a decoration?  Or do people really live and/or work in the needle.  Better LTURQ.  I think it's just a tourist attraction.  A STRANGE waste of money tourist attraction.  Well clearly they're making money otherwise they wouldn't be doing it.  Not necessarily!  They spent a lot of money to make it in the first place because they ANTICIPATED making lots of money.  But people were undhwelmed by it and now they're stuck with it making Note Enough Money To Cover Their Original Investment.  Sounds about right.  Also what else is going on.  Gotta be some better 20th century buildings out there.  Actually SHHHHH KEEP IT ON THE DOWN LOW.  Once we anoint a successor to WTC as Best Building then that building is in the Target Seat!  Huh.
    
Penultimate paragraph of Act I!  GOOD IDEA we choose Seattle Space Needle.  VERY HARD to hit it with a plane.  It being a needle is REALLY working out to its advantage!  Well that's perfect this works out great.  Hijacked plane would have to double back several times until it finally hits it.  And by that time we can shoot it out of the sky.  Safely!  I dunno what else is going on.  UH OH here's an idea for terrorists-- just build your own damn plane.  How hard can that be.  Hmm that checks out a little too well.  Gotta imagine we treat Plane Making Materials like Nuclear Bomb making materials.  WE MUST KEEP THE PLANE MAKING MATERIALS OUT OF THE HANDS OF THOSE WHO WOULD USE IT FOR HARM.  Dunno how that would work but I guess that's what we have to do now!  DAMNIT.  Well if there's no innocents on plane we can shoot it out of the sky no problem.  Yeah if we can HIT IT.  Haven't you ever played Space Invaders?  THIS IS TOUGH STUFF!
     Last paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it.  Wonderful.  Maybe we can fly planes into their planes kamikaze style.  The only way to stop a bad guy with a plane is a good guy with a plane.  What else is going on.  Or build force fields!  How hard is that.  Just surround everything with a force field.  Easy!  What else is going on.  I got some stuff in store for today.  Play some ROCKSMITH.  Maybe some CALL OF DUTY II haven't done that in a while.  Call of Duty II.  Sounds like a repetition.  DOODY and NUMBER TWO.  You heard it here first.  Also I wonder why I haven't heard that before as a euphemism.  Someone has to take a shit so they have to take their Call Of Duty.  Maybe Call Of Duty isn't really a phrase Outside Of Video Game Titles.  Better LTURQ.  YEP.  Not really a common phrase outside of video game.  Oh well that's life.  I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

I Have Nothing Better To Do

    Hello friends.  Time to write act ii!  Then shower then act III then walk then Same Stuff As Yesterday.  The stuff before The Same Stuff As Yesterday was ALSO the same stuff as yesterday.  Yeah but I decided to stop saying them explicitly.  Because I lost interest!  Wonderful.  HEY will I take a bath instead of a shower?  I'll never tell!  Sure I will.  I'll tell you first thing in act III.  Gotta keep you updated on the important issues of the day.  Watched Paranormal Activity I last night!  POSSIBLY for the first time and POSSIBLY for the second time.  Either way that sure was one way to spend 80 minutes.  Could have been worse!  Presumably.  LOOK can I think of anything worthwhile to say?  NO.  But gotta imagine something'll come to me soon.  VERY soon.  I'm due is the point!
     Hmm.  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  I might need to get a new phone or something.  My current one is becoming obsolete.  I don't have the details.  YES I DO.  I just haven't bothered reading them.  The details are in an e-mail my Dad got from Sprint and forwarded it to me.  The details are there!  Gotta imagine I'll never read that but ask my Dad to summarize.  I got THINGS to do.  Also the devil is in the details!  I don't wanna engage the Devil!  He's bad news has been my understanding.  Then again if I engage the Devil then GOD might come to help me.  I wanna get in touch with God.  Seems like a good guy based on my limited understanding!  The point is better to just not get involved with supernatural entities in the first place.  I learned that lesson THE HARD WAY by watching Paranormal Activity!  It was THE HARD WAY because I wasted 80 minutes on a not so great movie!
    I could have used that 80 minute doing SOMETHING BETTER.  PRESUMABLY.  Maybe some sort of Mario Kart playing.  I don't have the ability to play it right now but I could have used that time to PURCHASE the ability to play it IN THE FUTURE.  Anyway I just had FOUR mini animal crackers at once and it was just like eating a cookie!  Small cookie!  But GOOD one.  Also the texture of having separate cookies at once is much better than having a single continuous cookie!  Delicious!  Also do they still make cookie crisp and should I try it because I like small cookies?  The answers are Yes YES and YES!  Wait, no.  I don't know!  I don't know, I don't know, and PROBABLY.  Lemme LTURQ.  They still make it but super market I order from doesn't sell it!  They sell other dumb sweet cookies.  So that's something to consider!
   Dumb sweet CEREAL.  Talk about a Freudian Slip!  It's an interesting conversation topic!  Anyway what else is going on.  Bathing Experience To Remember is coming up pretty soon.  Gonna be a blast and a half either way, that's how I feel.  What's today.  Saturday.  ABOUT TIME.  Something along those lines.  I definitely watched a Scary Movie Spoof of Paranormal Investigations.  Paranormal Experiences.  Paranormal Encounters.  PARANORMAL ACTIVITY THERE WE GO.  Anyway it involved Marlon Wayans.  Probably playing a character other than himself.  That's about as far as I remember.  The point is I almost never ate breakfast as a kid and I feel like my parents should have bought me all the unhealthy cereals as a way to get me to eat breakfast?  Bad parenting!  Hopefully they lose custody of me sometime soon because of this.  I might could just benefit from new parents at this point in my life!
     Last paragraph before Cleansing Myself Of Dirt, Etc. Activity soon.  My mom was asking me to give her spoilers about certain things that may or may not happen later on in The Wire and I was ambiguous about the answers as I could be because I'm a GOOD SON.  I don't wanna give away ANYTHING other than the SPECIFIC EXACT INFO SHE WANTED.  The point is I deserve some sort of Nobel Award because of this.  She never gave me Cinnamon Toast Crunch except for maybe half a dozen times and I STILL give her ambiguous spoiler alerts?  Great Son Number One.  I didn't give her spoiler alerts.  I gave her spoilers.  But she asked for them.  So not even that.  The point is I've given us a lot to think about.  Sure.  I guess.  What else.  That's IT.  Great!  I'll be back soon.
 

 

 

What The Hell Are You Doing Here

    Hi friends.  Here to finish the entry!  What's going on in the wide world of sports.  I feel like my Mom hasn't thanked me explicitly enough about being as ambiguous as possible when she was asking me for spoilers.  I feel like it's not being as appreciated as it probably should be!  The good news is who cares that's not a real problem.  I got LIFE going on.  I can't let the little things upset me!  Sure I can!  It's better to let the little things upset you!  Then you're too busy to be upset by the big things!  And it's the big things that are really upsetting!  So just preoccupy yourself with the negative little things and you'll be a happy camper!  HMM I never went to sleepaway camp.  THIS UPSETS ME TO NO END.  Well here's the end.  So to SOME END I guess.
    
Cool!  Used to always go to sleep in the den while watching TV.  It's like having your own personal sleep over by yourself!  Well that WOULD BE TRUE but my Brother was always with me.  So it's like having a sleep over with my brother.  NOT SURE HOW I FEEL ABOUT THAT.  HE'S KIND OF A JERK WHEN WE WERE KIDS.  Oh well that's life.  I'd have a sleep over these days, sure.  With a girl is probably my first choice!  But with friends or family or strangers, I'd settle for those!  But sleeping over with a girl?  AMAZING.  WE CAN SWAP GHOST STORIES.  That's the first thing that comes to mind of what we can do.  Anyway.  What else is going on.  I don't know any ghost stories.  Except for ones I've read and/or seen in fillums.  Great I can tell her the story of The Exorcist.  I know enough details about that such that I can make the story last an entire minute.  Uh oh the devil is in the details.  Well the devil is part of the MAIN part of the story not the details in this case!  So not quite!
     Cool.  Relatively closing on time to eat lunch.  It's in THREE HOURS.  That could be a lot.  Or it could be a little!  It's all based on extenuating circumstances and whatnot.  What else is going on.  Girls, friends, family, and strangers.  Any other genre of person I can have a sleep over with.  People I KNOW that aren't girls friends or family.  That's true!  That's solidly another kind of sleepover I could have.  ANIMALS OR MINERALS.  OR VEGETATION.  Well sure that all checks out, too.  Except the animals are non-humans if we're being specific.  WAIT AS SECOND.  JUST MYSELF.  I can have a sleepover with myself as long as it's Somewhere Else!  We touched on this briefly a paragraph or two ago.  What else is going on.  Haven't watched a #TalesFromTheCryptTheSummerToRememberSavingsEvent in a while.  I can think of JUST THE ONE to watch next.  HOWEVER there's 2 main Youtube Videos of it and ONE OF THEM has no audio for several minutes in the middle.  WHAT IF I CHOOSE THAT ONE BY WRONGLY.  Then I'd have to SKIP those minutes.  And they're valuable entertainment minutes!  Oh no I'm scared.
    
Penultimate paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Two World Trade Centers.  Two.  My Dad ordered Tuna Fish Platter a few days ago and they accidentally gave us two of it because they heard TU and processed it as Two Tunafish.  ONLY IN AMERICA!!!  It's all coming together!  Also TWO ENTY YEARS.  WOW THIS IS CRAZY.  Anyway what else is going on.  I feel like I got stuffed filet of sole a couple of weeks ago and they gave me tunafish as a replacement for either the crab or the sole.  I tasted tuna fish!  And I DON'T LIKE IT.  Tunafish is gross.  Sure I ate it in sandwich form sometimes as a kid but it was gross then and it's gross now!  Great.  What else is going on.  Don't even get me started on TUNA SALAD.  Which I believe is tunafish plus mayonnaise.  I WILL NEVER EAT THAT.  Mayonnaise is the worst!
     Last paragraph.  About time!  I guess!  I think they set it up that The Mets are playing The Yankees during 9/11 Weekend because New York CAN'T lose.  If they were playing other teams and they lost people would be depressed.  Angry, even!  There would be riots!  But now at least one team will win.  So now there'll be ANTI-riots.  People would gather just to further enforce law and order!  That's how satisfied people would be with this outcome of a New York Team Winning A Baseball Game.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna take my next walk in 15-20 minutes I guess.  That's great, just great.  Come back and watch some TV.  Like I said, solid chance I watch some #TheTalesFromTheCryptTheSummerToRememberSavingsEvent.  I wasn't just wildly idly speculating about watching it!  When I say something I mean it!  Half the time!  Probably more like a third of the time!  The point is I sometimes mean the things I say.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:38 P.M.

 

 

 

Friday, September 10, 2021

I Don't Remember This Title

    Hello friends.  Got coffee going right now to start the entry!  Because I felt like it.  And it's delicious!  And I haven no soda or snapple so I needed something to drink.  How about water.  Yeah I got that going too but I NEED MORE.  Also I'm waiting for super market delivery, but I should be done with Act I by then!  So the good news is what's going on in the wide world of sports.  My mom is halfway through season II of The Wire!  At this point odds are she finishes it.  She's demonstrated she's serious about watching it at this point.  Also she's seein it before.  I didn't say that!  That's important to the calculation odds estimates.  VERY important.  Anyway.  Got steak and/or seafood for lunch today!  Then it's a fresh start for dinner.  I LOVE fresh starts.  So much better than rotten starts.  Then again I'd take a rotten start tonight.  Just to mix things up.
    
What else.  Up to the last and final Final Destination!  I believe this is the one where someone narrowly avoids death in the beginning, also preventing the deaths of other people, and then they die over the course of the movie, usually getting smooshed by something.  I'm not exaggerating when I say over 50% of the deaths in this movie are people rapidly getting smooshed by something in the sense that their body gets crushed completely and immediately.  SURE that would be a fine death but they literally do the same one over and over!  I DON'T GET IT.  Also most of the non-smooshed deaths are people getting impaled through the eye.  That happens 3-5 times!  And it's not like yep this is how Death gets people when they escape initially.  The premise is THIS IS A NEW CRAZY DEATH!  But it's NOT.  IT'S NOT NEW AND CRAZY AT ALL.
    
Cool.  Anyway.  After Final Destination III the next film in the franchise was called THE FINAL DESTINATION.  No number.  Because this one was the end all be all Final Destination!  Concluding chapter of the franchise!  Then a few years later there was a Final Destination V.  I hope someone got fired over that mishap!  Because I get off on people losing their jobs.  It makes me happy inside.  The point is there might be a long break between Act I and next walk because I have to stay in house to wait for delivery.  That's life I guess!  Is it?  I'm gonna have to look into that one.  Might not be life at all.  Cool.  My Dad is taking my Mom to get Covid test today!  She has SURGERY next week and needs proof of no covid!  So I'll be accepting super market delivery and putting stuff away all by my lonesome.  PERFECT.  I EXCEL AT WORKING ALONE.  I guess.  Speaking of Lonesome, Gavin Newsom recall vote is coming up!  I hope he's NOT recalled.  Because I CARE ABOUT CALIFORNIA.  As far as I'm concerned it's easily in my top 25% of states.  I dunno about EASILY.  It's most likely in my top 25% of states!
     Anyway.  My favorite part of California is the FORESTS.  Some nice Redwood Trees.  I can get on board with that!  Also California was part of the Wild Wild West!  In the sense that they made the movies about the wild wild west a century after the fact.  Fascinating.  If I were my Mom I'd watch Them Sopranos after That Wire.  I'm not my Mom, though!  That'd be pretty weird!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna check my weight tomorrow!  Again, I'd settle for losing 1.5 pounds over a week and a half.  But I'd really like 2 pounds!  And 1 pound would be a disappointment.  That's life I guess!  Anyway I'm getin' there!  I don't know where exactly but If There's A Place To Get To, then surely I Am Getting There.  Slowly!  Slow and steady wins the race!  I dunno about that.  That sounds wrong.  Very wrong.  Gonna have to look into that one.  If slow and steady wins the race then BOWSER or DONKEY KONG would win every Super Mario Kart race.  And we all know LUIGI or maybe YOSHI always wins!  Well that settles that I guess.
   
What else is going on.  I feel like some short cuts in Mario Kart were TRICKS.  You think it's a hidden alternate way to get through the track so it MUST be a short cut but they're playing TRICKS on you and it's actually slightly longer.  This is the stuff that keeps me up at night.  That thought DID occur to me, what, a few days ago.  I haven't played Mario Kart in 14 years.  Oh well better late then never.  I'd play some Mario Kart.  Also for dumb people Mario Kart is a racing game on The Nintendos where you play as characters in Mario.  Maybe other assorted characters from Nintendo Franchise.  But mostly Mario!  Anyway what else is going on.  Oh.  The characters are driving Go Karts.  More or less.  They're not just running.  Hmm.  I can't think of any Track And Field video games at all.  Seems like a pretty big oversight!
     Sixth paragraph.  I don't believe it!  I finished coffee.  Oh well!  I considered having 3 cups today instead of 2 but I think I'm gonna stick with two.  That's life I guess!  Well its PART of life.  A very small part.  That rings true.  The Mets are playing The Yankees today!  FINALLY we'll settle once and for all Whose Gonna Win The Game Tonight Between The Yankees And Mets.  That sort of thing!  Anyway my Mom made coffee early this morning so did that have an impact on when/how many Coffee I Will Drink?  Possibly!  The point is I'll probably have to re-make MORE coffee for cup #2.  Re-make more?  THAT'S AN INCORRECTITUDE.  MORE hasn't been made at all in the first place.  Let's talk about it.  We just did.  Oh right okay.  HEY there's a new horror movie out today.  I don't know the details but apparently it's not that great.  Not That Great?  YOU'VE GOT MY ATTENTION!  I'll watch that sure.  I got nothing better to do!  Well, sure I do.  But I also have LOTS of worse things to do.  So there's that.
    
Sure. 
I guess.  Wonder what kind of dumb stuff I'm gonna come up with for the next four paragraphs to finish this act.  Maybe some stuff about the stuff I've already talked about.  Always more to be mined there!  Also speaking of mines how about that DUNE film coming.  Doesn't seem good to me!  I had a video game that was roughly similar in plot to Dune and I didn't enjoy that video game a all!  It wasn't about Dune but is REMINDED me of the little I know/knew about Dune so basically that ruined Dune for me.  You heard it here first.  Also TOO SANDY.  I'm not sure I like the desert as a setting at all.  I for one don't wanna be there.  Why are THESE characters there?  Don't they know there's better environments to be in?  What are they dumb or something?  Doesn't add up!  That sort of thing.  Dune takes place in Deserts, right?  Other planet deserts.  The Wild Wild West was often in the desert.  Fascinating.
    
Eighth paragraph!  I guess!  What else.  It's odd that I like watching horror movies so much but I enjoy maybe 10-20% of the horror movies I watch.  A good amount of them I KIND OF get something out of even though they're bad.  But there's maybe 10-20% that I'm like well that was a good movie.  But I guess I like them because they're FAMILIAR.  Ya know what you're getting!  Also gotta do something!  Horror movies are as good as any other hobby.  Except for how they're routinely bad and I get nothing out of.  Yeah but BESIDES not liking what I do individually but enjoying it collectively.  BESIDES that it makes A TON of sense to continue watching horror movies all the time!  Yep that checks out.  You know Luigi and Yoshii are good at Mario Kart because they're GREEN.  GREEN MEANS GO.  Green is the best color to be in a race!
     Not sure about that.  But the good news is We're Gettin' There in terms of progressing through the entry!  At this point it looks like coffee routine from this point onward will be normal!  I just had first cup with paragraphs 1-5 instead of 6-10!  But that's all over now.  Well more or less.  Still 1.5 paragraphs to go without coffee as a mix-em-up.  OH NO guess what I DON'T CARE!!!  SURE.  Hey after super market delivery comes I can drink some soda!  That's the first immediate impact it has on my diet for the upcoming week.  Wonderful.  Got some mini black-and-whites as a breakfast cookie for upcoming week.  I'm happy with that!  That's why I set it up that way in the first place!  Because I CALCULATED and DETERMINED I'd be happy with that once it came true!  Whattado between Act I and Super Market delivery.  Maybe get started on That There Horror Movie.  Sounds like one way to live my life if I'm not trying too hard to make my life worthwhile and/or good.
     Last paragraph!  Of the act!  Yeah!  I'd still be on board with Nintendo in an alternate universe where they didn't Lean Into personal mini consoles that you can walk around with.  You give me a nice Regular For-TV Game Console that's a Nintendo?  I would have strongly considered going in that direction for when I get new system!  Now it's too late!  I'm not getting ANY new system!  Unless Nintendo comes out with a regular for TV console something in the intermediate future!  Then I'm gonna see what that's all about!  YEAH.  Hmm.  Wonder if I still have a Gameboy somewhere.  And if it would still work.  If I do I believe it's a gameboy COLOR.  Which is several years more advanced than original gameboy.  Because you can see COLOR in it not just black and white.  WOW NOW WE'RE TALKIN.  Also it's totally backwards compatible.  Same games.  Just more color!  Amazing.  Really makes ya think life is worth living with that kind of stuff.  Hey the act is over.  Be back soon!

 

 

 

 

I Don't Believe It

    Hello friends.  Super market delivery came no more than 10 minutes after I finished act I!  And I'm already enjoying the fruits of my labor by drinking Sprite Zero.  Labor?  What labor.  I Accepted the delivery products.  That was the labor.  YEP and now I'm enjoying the fruits!  Anyway took a walk after that and now I'm here!  Wonderful.  Way ahead of schedule today!  I might just kick back and relax for 5 minutes.  I probably won't, though!  I dunno what I'd be doing with myself.  Kicking back and relaxing is more complicated than it sounds!  Anyway my parents are back.  Presumably my Mom had her covid test.  That's her business, not mine!  Kind of my business.  I live with her and covid is TRANSPORTABLE between people per my understanding.  So our tests are each otherses businesses.
     I guess.  Gonna start the horror movie Oh I Don't Know after shower before act III!  Gotta make bonus coffee for then, too.  My mom didn't make enough for me to have 2 cups!  Whatta jip!  Sure.  I took bath two times in a row.  Today I think I go for a shower.  I THINK.  Solid 75% chance as of now I go with a shower.  This percentage of chance may change over time!  For example right now, 20 seconds later, it's more like 72%.  NOW it's back up to 75%.  I could keep you updated on this situation as it progresses but I feel that after a while, a long while, sure, but after a while it would start to get boring.  So there's that!  Wonderful.  Mets are BACK AGAINST THE WALL in playoff chances.  In danger of falling back out of contention as soon as TODAY.  Oh no I liked it better when they were in contention.  If they make the playoffs they might play several more baseball games this year.  That's SEVERAL HOURS OVERALL that I would be entertained by.  Without that I don't KNOW what I'll be doing with that time.  Oh no.  Might have to figure out how to kick back and relax. 
     What else!  I feel like I watch baseball poorly.  Just not good at it!  I don't know how to elaborate on that but suffice to say I'm bad at enjoying and appreciating a baseball game.  Just like horror movies.  I'll WATCH 'em.  I'll feel STRONGLY about them.  But do I really like it?  I dunno!  A little!  Somewhat, I guess!  What else is going on.  Hmm possibly Nothing.  Very possible that Nothing else is going on.  In which case I don't know what that means for the entry!  I was always counting on there being Something Else!  Without something else HOW THE HELL am I gonna write the rest of this?  Hmm.  What's the chance I take a shower vs bath right now.  Shower at 81%.  Fascinating.  Getting close to the end of the year.  SOLIDLY in the last third.  I feel like dividing the year into thirds is an underrated way to do it.  It's easy and it makes sense!  January through April.  May through August.  September through December!  I feel like I've ALWAYS kinda done this without realizing it.  WOW THIS IS GREAT.
    KIND OF
what we do for school year.  Two semesters a year and summer.  It's not 100% balanced in this context but That's That.  GREAT I thought I was a genius with dividing years into thirds.  Turns out School is way ahead of me.  Still though, solid point.  Anyway.  Chance of shower is down to 70%.  I still feel it's prevalent in my mind but I'm starting to have small doubts in which I consider maybe bath would be better than shower.  Ugh.  Anyway what else is going on.  I successfully woke up really early so I could take walk really early even compared to the earliest time super market delivery was supposed to come.  Happy I did it!  I almost Snoozed through that and didn't take any walk before delivery.  And it turns out delivery came early anyway but if it didn't I'd be WAY behind schedule.  The point is I FORGET.  I was trying to make a POINT.  Something like Don't Snooze.  It SUCKS but in the end your life will benefit or something.
     Then again snoozing is the greatest!  You can't go wrong I guess.  Nope.  You can't go RIGHT.  Snooze or  not snooze you're not happy about it one way or another.  That's MY hot take.  I turned out to be happy about this.  Yeah EVENTUALLY.  At THE MOMENT though it's not something to be happy with.  WHAT THE HELL AM I TALKING ABOUT.  Oh.  Right.  Shower up to 75% again.  That's what the last thing I was talking about was I think!  Shower up to 85%.  88%.  87%.  88%.  Well great we seem to be zeroing in on something.  The point is we're also Very Close to shower such that these estimations are more relevant than the ones 2 paragraphs ago.  That's why it's getting more sure compared to less sure.  So there's that.  Anyway hey I'm gonna take that shower now.  I'll be back soon!
 

 

 

 

 

Finally I'll See You Later

    Hello friends.  Had a half a handful of mini animal crackers!  Delicious!  Took a shower.  Wonderful!  Good chance I'll get BREAKFASTCENTRIC MEAL FOR TONIGHT!!!!  And also I'm enthusiastic about having bison burger tomorrow.  I'm gonna be a BIG proponent of making tonight's delivery Diner Delivery so I can accomplish both those meals.  I think I've got a good shot!  Anyway.  Gonna have a sizable break between Act III and Walk III.  Watch some of that HORROR movie everyone's talking about.  I haven't said the name once when talking about it.  No free rides!  They want to get the name in the entry It's Gonna Cost Ya!  Wonderful.  Also at what point will they make a 2005 Horror Movie called No Free Rides.  Which presumably would be about a teen hitchhiker (innocent good guy) and the guy who picks him up (semi-redneck truck driver) wants to kill him (to harvest his organs).  Let's get crackin' on that 16 years ago!
    YOU LOST ME AT HARVEST HIS ORGANS.  Up until then I was on board with myself!  Anyway what else is going on.  Got coffee.  Got Sprite Zero!  HEY I feel like if I get Coke Zero at this point it's GOTTA be new coke zero.  Let's see if Super Market sells 2 liter bottles of coke zero.  THEY SURE DO.  Next week I can get that!  I don't like the taste of Coke.  Any iteration of coke.  Yeah but this is SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT.  Don't knock it till you've tried it!  Then feel free to knock it.  That all depends on whether you enjoyed it or not when trying it.  Or maybe you wanna knock it even if you enjoyed it.  You're some kind of jerk in this scenario it turns out!  Oh well that's your business not mine.  Anyway.  What else.  Getting close to being done with the entry! I envy my future self.  Being able to kick back and relax.  That's presumably enjoyable once I figure out how to do it.  Probably should have figured it out at this point in my life.  Oh well live and learn. I feel I USED to know how to kick back an relax.  At some point I lost it though!
     Wonderful.  French toast would be delicious but I'm leaning towards Freedom Chip Pancakes.  Can't go wrong with chocolate!  I don't see CHOCOLATE anywhere in the title of this dish.  Where is this CHOCOLATE coming from.  All I SHOULD be able to taste is The Freedom.  Well, more accurately, the Freedom Chips.  Which sounds delicious, too!  Wonderful.  I enjoyed the jalepeno peppers on the bison burger last time!  I think I'll get that again.  In fact maybe just skip the burger and eat some jalapeno peppers.  Wait no that's too far.  Keep the burger.  Okay that sounds good too!  Freedom Peppers.  Well lets not over do it.  If you describe everything as Freedom then it eventually loses all meaning!  What else is going on.  Put Steak & Seafood Part I in oven.  Put Part II in microwave.  Part III?  Gonna go with microwave again!  Potatoe was better in oven but steak and seafood were better in microwave.  So that's where my life is at!
     Penultimate paragraph EVER of the day.  Wow amazing.  What other soda did I put in fridge for myself.  Probably diet pepsi.  So next time I pour myself soda I may go with the diet pepsi!  Delicious.  Who came up with calling Zero Calorie Versions Of Things diet.  You can't have a diet of diet things.  You'd get zero nutrition!  You'd die IMMEDIATELY.  Well not immediately.  But you'd die EVENTUALLY.  You'd die RELATIVELY QUICKLY ALL THINGS CONSIDERED.  So the point is I think I made the point pretty well.  You get it!  Diet of diet things will kill you.  Anyway.  The point is I forget.  I think some Diet Food And Drink may have a minimal amount of calories.  Like 2-5 calories per serving size.  So I guess if you just ate that stuff all day and all of the night you MIGHT be able to live for a bit longer.  So that's one thing to consider.  Huh.
    
Last paragraph!  Wonderful.  Gotta imagine there's some racing game for The Xbox where it's Go Karts but not of Mario characters.  Think I saw something in regards to SONIC Racing Game.  Better LTURQ.  YEP THAT EXISTS.  Why would I want to play that though.  I can't be LUIGI.  If you can't be Luigi what's even the point?  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta imagine Sonic wins every race.  He's KNOWN for his speed.  It's his main thing!  Then again slow and steady wins the race.  So the Slow Guy from Sega wins all the time.  Hmm.  Crash Bandicoot?  Only other sega character I can think of off the top of my head.  This game might be JUST SONIC characters.  So it's sonic, and... that guy he faces at the end of the level!  That's 15 people right there!  Anyway.  I'll see ya tomorrow.

-12:17 P.M.

 

 

 

 

Thursday, September 9, 2021

Let's Get This Out Of The Way

    Hey!  OH NO I am a little bit behind schedule today.  We're talkin WOKE UP ON THE LATER SIDE OF THINGS.  All in all though I feel I could MANEUVER around things such that my day is more or less the same.  I will not CONSCIOUSLY maneuver.  I just am banking on doing things slightly quicker naturally.  Why not!  If I were me, that's what I would do!  Anyway here we go with a new day.  What did I do yesterday that was great.  I'm 80% into Final Destination THREE!  I believe there are 5 or 6 overall.  Also the final destination is Watching The Movie.  We all take different courses in life but ultimately we end up watching Final Destination.  That's how I feel.  Mets played a nice game yesterday.  They didn't win but the course they took towards not winning was entertaining enough to watch.  HEY it's baseball.  How entertaining!  That's how I feel.  Sometimes.  NOT OFTEN.
    
Cool.  Got enough soda I feel for today.  Tomorrow I re-up.  For today I have 1.5 2 liter bottles left over!  IDEALLY I'd be drinking 2 - 2.5 2 liter bottles a day but this I CAN WORK WITH.  Anyway I had some sort of nightmare going into the morning waking up.  You'd think that would have encouraged me to wake up on time if anything and not sleep later.  Why would I want the nightmare to continue?  FUN.  It's like watching a horror movie in your head!  Except the stakes are higher!  Cause it's happening to you!  Do some people dream stuff happening to other people?  I dunno about you but I'm always the main character in my dream and it's always in the first person.  Sure First Person can REPRESENT other people and whatnot.  But as far as I'm concerned In Dream it's always stuff happening to me/I'm doing.  ALSO IN LIFE.
    
Whatever.  Got a nice Part II of Steak & Seafood for today as well as Super Market Herbed Chicken Dish.  It's GREAT because they're both You Standard Dinner.  Main Dish come with potato and vegetable.  That's NOT great.  Too repetitive!  Either way this is the life we chose.  Anyway.  Is there any sport where you peak in your 40's and 50's.  GOLF POSSIBLY.  I just feel like sports players get to have fun in 20's and 30's and then they hit Post-Sportum Depression what would imagine.  Now they can GOLF.  Golf isn't a sport.  It's an activity.  Also golf is barely even an activity.  It's just Nonsense Actions.  I feel like old people can play old sports.  Why can't we just have Sports Leagues of The Main Sports but only for people in their 50's.  THEY MIGHT FALL DOWN AND BREAK THEMSELVES.  They don't care it's worth the risk!  That's how they feel.
     Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe that's why people like golf!  They get off on people being old and doing stuff.  It's as good a reason as I can come up with.  IS there a version of golf where it's golf but instead of hitting the ball you fence with each other using your golf clubs?  My guess?  Yes.  Anyway fourth paragraph.  Gonna pour my coffee AFTER the fifth paragraph.  Just so we're both on the same page!  What kind of time is the Mets game today.  I'm gonna guess EVENING.  Let's go to the video tape!  EVENING 6:40.  Same time as last 2 or 3 games!  That's been working out well for me.  I've had some nice days the last few days per my limited understanding.  Anyway.  Mets huh.  They play baseball!  With some other teams.  Sometimes only with themselves!  I'd imagine.  Do baseball teams had Practice Days during regular season.  I'm sure they practice before games.  If I were them I'd practice after games, too!  But do they have days off where they show up anyway and practice?  My guess?  Sure that seems reasonable.
    
Dunno why that's worthwhile at all to say and/or read.  Dunno a lot of things these days!  How about these PITCHES pitchers throw.  Enough with all the pitches!  WE GET IT!  Anyway.  What am I gonna do first when entry is over in a few hours.  I dunno!  Maybe watch some TELEVISION SET.  Change some channels while I'm at it!  No reason I have to watch the channel that it's on that I was watching last.  I've got a remote!  TWO OF EM even.  I think when they first invented remote for TV it spoiled people.  Suddenly they wanted remotes for anything!  There was an immediate REMOTE industry.  Remote for this!  Remote for that!  It's TOO Excessive!  Also you don't have to say TOO Excessive!  The word Excessive GET'S THE JOB DONE ITSELF.  So there's that.  Anyway what kind of remotes I got form non TV stuff.  I feel like I had a Stereo Boom Box in the late 1990's with a remote.  Rings some sort of bell.  Also my doorbell-- can be accessed by a remote!  Yeah the good news is coffee time.
     Sure.
  What else is going on.  My mom turned on THE WIRE.  I heard the SOUNDTRACK from my room.  I guess because Michael K Williams died.  So there's that.  I don't mind listening to this in the background.  Wow get a lot of these VOICES.  This show works just as well as a Radio Play!  I like the sound effects.  You want me to know a car is driving?  Make the noise of a car being droven!  I totally get the idea just by Sound!  Amazing.  My favorite character in The Wire is That Guy.  Whom does things.  You know which one I'm thinking of!  Look they're all good.  A better discussion is who is my LEAST favorite character in The Wire.  Hmm.  That's not a great discussion, either!  Gotta think of something that's a Good Discussion.  DAMNIT thinking of something?  I don't remember signing up for this!
    
Seventh paragraph!  I guess.  It might be raining intermittently today!  Hopefully LIGHT rain.  That's my hot take.  Anyway hey what else is going on.  New HORROR movie coming on HBOMax at the end of the week.  Horror movie?  I LIKE THOSE for some reason.  Seems as good as anything a thing to be a nerd about.  I dunno about being a nerd about it.  Nerds have to be knowledgeable about it!  I know SOME stuff but not that much.  I dunno about being a Horror Geek, either!  I'm not passionate enough to be a geek.  Horror Fan.  How about that.  I dunno that sounds fair.  Also no negative connotation.  Nerd and Geek are negative things.  Being a fan?  That's THE BEST THING YOU CAN BE IN THE WORLD.  So great then it's settled.  People who golf sometimes fence with each other using their golf clubs.  Now we finally got that out of the way.
     Eighth paragraph.  Is there a version of golf where you have to throw the ball instead of hit it with a club.  Gotta imagine that's another skill set people could develop.  Both long throwing and then the putting game throwing.  That sort of thing.  It's good because it's just as fun but you can save money on golf clubs.  Also are ALL clubs legal.  I know there's special clubs and whatnot.  But can you design anything that maybe isn't motorized and use it as a club?  My guess?  I DON'T KNOW.  I could see that being more or less the case or not!  Solidly can picture it either way!  Anyway.  Wonder if I still have any Boom Box Stereo anywhere that still works.  Sounds like fun.  It's like listening to music on a computer but no one is hacking into your music listenings!  Maybe someone is.  They'd have to be REALLY good at hacking to hack into something not connected to the internet.  But I wouldn't put anything past this guy!  What guy.  The best hacker in the world guy.  Oh him.
    
Ninth paragraph.  Maybe it's Lester Freeman.  He somehow got a Wire up on my Stereo Boom Box.  Which is impressive for both Time and Space.  It's both not connected to internet AND it's from over 20 years ago.  NOT TO MENTION he's a fictional character.  All in all Lester Freamon hacking into my Stereo is VERY impressive on all fronts.  What else is going on.  I feel like the one I'm imagining played CDs.  But I surely had ones before then that played Audio Cassettes.  Surely!  What else is going on.  I dunno.  I forget!  Or I never knew.  But there is other stuff going on, I just don't know what it is!  One of two lightbulbs in my bathroom went out.  Gotta replace it today!  With help of Dad!  And/or him doing it with help of Me.  Whatever one he wants to do I'm on board with!  I feel like I know what to do to do it myself.  But if he wants to help I'm not gonna turn that down! 
     Sure!  Next walk is coming up soon.  I don't believe it!  I think it might be raining but if it is its lightly.  I can, "Live," with that!  Huh.  The median age of a golfer is 54.  But I think that includes recreational players.  I could easily figure it out but I don't feel like clicking on that link!  End up on a list somewhere.  A list of people who want to know the median age of golfers.  Look THEY TOLD ME the median age.  I just put in AVERAGE age.  GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT THIS, "MEDIAN," CRAP OKAY.  Wonderful.  Professional golfers begin to decline in quality of play in late 30's.  Like other sports.  But the difference is They Keep At It!  Oh well that's life.  I guess.  I wrote this act pretty fast.  Not so much behind schedule at all anymore!  I feel like I've been writing faster in general lately.  Gettin' the hang of it! Also gettin' the hang of not saying anything worthwhile which makes the whole ordeal go a lot quicker too!  I'll be back soon!  Sorry!

 

 

 

That's All For Today

    Hey friends!  Here to write act II.  I don't believe it!  What's the over/under on when my Mom abandons watching The Wire.  Either in terms of episodes watched or days watching it.  My guess would be Today if we're doing it by days.  Episodes is a little bit more complicated.  Either way what else is going on.  YES it's sad that Michael K Williams died.  By not elaborating on my disappointment re: him dying I may have wrongly given the impression I don't care!  I do care.  I enjoyed his Actings and he seemed like a good person based on Not Knowing Him At All.  Also it's sad when anyone dies.  Unless they're evil.  And I have seen VERY LITTLE evidence that Michael K Williams was evil.  Hardly ANY.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna take a shower when this act is over.  Then act III!  Then walk.  Then what else.  HMM.
    
Anyway.  I took a bath yesterday!  Wait a second no I didn't!  That was two days ago!  Because I told you about it!  Wait a second no it wasn't!  It was yesterday!  And then I told you about it in act III after the bath yesterday!  Anyway it was fun but I don't wanna spoil myself by taking baths all the time.  Gotta take a shower.  Baths are for the BOURIGEAISEE.  Showers are WORKING CLASS.  And I don't really fall into any class because I don't work AND I'm not a BOUGIESEE but I'd rather be in the working class.  They've got SPUNK.  Anyway what else is going on.  Don't wanna be in poverty, though.  They've got it rough!  If I learnt anything from The Wire it's that poor people are drug addict and/or they've got it rough.  Also it's possible I haven't learned anything from The Wire.  Which is ironic because as far as Dramatic TV Shows Go I feel like The Wire is in the 99th percentile of shows that Want To Teach You Things.
     What else is going on.  CRAPS is a game that can easily be exploited by knowing odds.  I picked that up somewhere in season IV.  I still don't know how the game works but I know enough that just by knowing odds you can beat the game.  Either on a one-time basis And/Or consistently by playing it all the time so that the odds even out and you STILL come out on top.  Either way that's something to consider.  I dunno Craps seems like a zero sum game if you're playing it on the street.  There's no House, is there?  It's not like this is MY ALLEY all the rake in Craps Game Tonight Goes To Me.  I think it just gets spread around amongst the players.  So if you know odds and others don't you're SURE to win in the long run.  Then again if you're playing craps hopefully you'd know the odds well enough as anyone else playing such that it's pretty even.  I've given myself a lot to think about.
     What else is going on.  Wearin' some nice No Pants.  I'm taking a shower soon, why bother.  Took them pants off when I got home.  The shower is in less than an hour from getting home, c'mon!  Why bother with pants is my official position for this paragraph at least.  Also, possible at most!  VERY likely it will cease being my official position (or even unofficial position!) after the next few sentences.  Because also WEARING pants has a lot going for it.  There's no question!  You can't go wrong re: wearing pants or not.  I don't know what that means.  Wonderful.  The Mets are playing the Yankees this weekend!  That's interesting.  I like one of those teams as my favorite team and I dislike the other one of those teams as probably my least favorite team!  I hope the series works out in my favorite team's favor.  You heard it here first.
    
Cool!  Last paragraph of the act.  I don't believe it!  I don't want to risk exciting you too much but What The Hell THE METS HAVE HOME FIELD ADVANTAGE DURING THIS UPCOMING SERIES AGAINST THE YANKEES.  THEY WILL BE PLAYING IN THEIR STADIUM.  Wonderful.  What else is going on.  Maybe I DO take a bath again today.  I enjoyed it.  There's no real reason not to.  The idea that I should take a shower because it's more working class is nonsense.  That kind of nonsense is fine for website entry but to actually live my life based on it is more or less relatively dumb.  Anyway I got coffee #2 saved for act #3.  So I got that to look forward to.  Anyway.  Shower or bath, the room won't be as light as usual!  One bulb is gone!  I'm operating in half darkness!  Then again I got a window going on.  That adds light to the room.  So I got that going for me.  Wonderful.  Is this enough sentences to start the bathing process.  Yes.  It's enough.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

There's Always More

    Hey it's been roughly soon and now I'm back.  Took a bath.  I had a great time!  Well a reasonably positive experience time at least.  Room was totally light enough!  Anyway I was gonna watch PSYCHO yesterday because I've never actually seen the whole thing but then I DIDN'T.  I watched the shower scene.  Not so great!  Could have used more nudity.  Maybe not 100% nudity but let's say 80% there instead of 30%.  Then again the 30% There FOR THE TIME was probably 90% there.  The point is Oh Well What Can Ya Do.  Also it was REVOLUTIONARY in terms of using the Psycho Music for things.  Before Psycho they never used that music AT ALL.  Maybe they did.  It's not totally out of the realm of possibility that the music was used before somewhere else Presumably In Film.  So I got that going for me is the point.  Also who is the psycho, the guy or his mother.  Huh.  What do you mean.  OF COURSE I've seen this movie before and know what happens.  Get off my back about it!
    
Anyway.  Probably gonna have Steak &/V seafood for lunch and chicken for dinner.  That's how I feel right now!  You can't argue with a feeling.  You'd have no motive!  Getting 2 boxes of Mini Animal Cancer Crackers for upcoming week.  Me and my Dad be goin' through them like buzzsaws.  Also buzzsaws go through things quickly.  Are buzzsaws those circular saws that cut perpendicularly.  Or is that some other kind of saw.  Also buzzsaw is not a word.  I guess it's two words.  Because a, "Buzz Saw," is definitely something I've heard before In Life.  And/or Saw.  In film.  I may have seen it in the last film I was watching Why It's Only Final Destination III.   GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.  Also I assume by Final Destination they only mean the plane arriving in Paris Appropriately where all the teenagers live and then go to Paris.  What do you mean you don't think I've ever seen Final Destination I.  Of course I have.
    
Jeez.  Had a mini chips ahoy cancer cookie just now!  Chips Ahoy has no track record of causing Cancer as far as we know.  That's because Hollywood Successfully Stood Up To Cancer.  One of the first things they did with their political/social/financial capital was remove the cancer from Chips Ahoy products.  Gotta take care of them first things first and whatnot.  Anyway.  Maybe check my weight tomorrow morning.  More likely the morning after that.  Anyway there should be a film The Day After The Day After Tomorrow and it's about us curbing Global Warming to the best of our ability and it's a relatively nice and peaceful film.  That sounds like CRAZY Science Fiction.  ONLY IN THE PICTURES can ya imagine us taking care of global warming to the best of our ability!  It doesn't ring true at all!  Too big a plot hole and whatnot!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Gonna solidly have a bit of time between finishing entry and taking next walk.  What to do with that period of time.  15-30 minutes or so.  Hmm this is a tough one.  I can eat more cookies.  They're small so it's healthy to eat them.  But that doesn't take up much time at all!  Maybe 10 seconds at most in terms of getting them, eating them, and putting the rest of them away.  Gotta come up with 15-30 minutes minus 10 seconds at most MORE stuff to do besides that!  Jeez.  Watch Final Destination III: The Last 15-25 minutes!  Perfect!  That's the amount of film I have left over and it aligns pretty closely with how much time I'll have before walk.  I DUNNO ABOUT THAT.  Too much pressure!  What if I wanna take the walk and the film has 5-10 minutes left (NOT COUNTING CREDITS).  I'd feel PRESSURE to watch the rest of the film even if I wanna take a walk.  I DON'T LIKE THIS ONE BIT.
   
You heard it here first.  Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.   I probably should get three cancer animal cracker boxes just to play it safe but that would be crazy.  I'm not crazy!  Despite what my website HTML domain seems to suggest.  Also what my brain doctors seem to suggest just by existing and treating me.  They don't even need to explicitly suggest that I'm crazy.  The fact that they exist in my life alone is enough proof!  Oh well that's life.  Is it, though.  It's MY life.  So that's SOME sort of life at least.  That checks out.  I AM alive.  And thusly I Have A Life.  Roughly.  Jeez.  I dunno.  What kinda stuff can I say over the next 2-8 sentences.  My Mom is still watching The Wire.  So if you had Episode 1 or 2 as the last episode she gets to you've lost.  Sorry!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:20 P.M.

 

 

 

Wednesday, September 8, 2021

I Don't Know What I'm Doing

    Hey!  Here we go with some more.  I've been looking ALL MORNING to doing this.  In the sense that doing this will bring me closer to Not Having To Do This.  Gotta do it before I'm done doing it!  And I CAN'T WAIT to be Done Doing It!  So there's that.  Anyway.  Got some Calamari for lunch today.  You know how that goes.  It's healthy because I know how much I am eating and its a reasonable amount.  Everything is healthy when you know how much of it to eat.  Sometimes that amount is zero.  Tiramisu is healthy because I don't eat it.  Makes sense.  What kind of fun songs did I play on The Rocksmith yesterday.  Oasis!  Their song required my guitar to be out of tune so that was a hassle and a half but it's over with now.  NOT REALLY.  The consequences remain.  Now I'm gonna need to tune it BACK for next time I want to play a non-Oasis song.  What a scam.  I knew Oasis was a scam!  I just couldn't put my finger on why and/or how.  Now I know!
     Cool.  I guess!  Watched The Final Destination Film Experience To Remember and it was okay!  Also it is EERILY SIMILAR to how I remembered the movie went from past times I've watched it.  Practically as if it was THE EXACT SAME THING.  Creepy!  I like how the characters become friends over the course of the movie.  AT the beginning they know each other but aren't friends.  But as they start to die they realize they have a lot in common and become friends.  THAT'S what I like to see!  FRIENDSHIPS CREATED.  Every time someone becomes friends with someone I get off just a little bit!  Also sure ultimately They All Die but at least their last moments were with people they loved.  You could say that for all of us!  I dunno I feel like a lot of our last moments won't be with people we love.  Oh well that's OUR problem get off... their backs... about it?
    
Cool!  HEY Patriotism Day is coming up.  I know because ESPN is talking about 20 YEARS LATER: THE MIKE PIAZZA HOMERUN THAT MADE US BELIEVE AGAIN.  The entire story is hey a few weeks after 9/11 they played a baseball game and A MET (FROM THE NEW YORK CITY) HIT A HOMERUN!!!  AMAZING.  I DON'T BELIEVE IT!  Not impressed.  If they really wanted to impress me Mike Piazza would have hit a homerun that ultimately hit Bin Laden on the head causing him a concussion and eventually killing him from complications.  THAT'D be memorable.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  If 9/11 was a horror movie, I think we're due for a sequel where it turns out BIN LADEN HAD SOMEONE HIGHER UP that was REALLY planning the attack.   And now we gotta worry about killing him!  Sounds like a horror movie to me.  We'd have to do something!  I don't wanna do things.  Very Scary.
    
Also he's toying with us by giving us riddles and if we don't answer the riddles there will be another attack.  DAMNIT RIDDLES.  Actually WAIT A SECOND this could be fun.  What KIND of riddles.  Hey what else is going on.  Fourth paragraph!  Gonna get coffee AFTER next paragraph.  Yeah!  Also we all know 9/11 isn't a horror movie, it's an action movie.  I can think of at least one 9/11 movie and it was an action movie  I never saw it but it just SEEMED like an action movie.  You heard it here first.  Felt like a horror movie in real life!  But that shows how much we know.  It was actually an action movie.  What else is going on.  20 years is a pretty long time.  On the one hand I was in middle school in 2001 and in essence I am more or less STILL in middle school.  On the other hand 20 years is an entire Generation.  On the other hand I am 12 going on 13.  So there's that!  Maybe it's 9/11's fault I never grew up.  Seems as good a thing as any to blame for that!
     Anyway what else is going on.  I grew up!  In a solid 60% of ways.  The MAJORITY of me is grown compared to when I was in middle school.  I feel very strongly about this!  Anyway what else is going on.  Got some nice ice cream to eat tonight.  I eat BARS of ice cream at night right before going to bed.  DELICIOUS.  Small bars sure.  LOW CALORIE bars of course.  But BARS NONETHELESS.  Who came up with the word nonetheless and did he know he'd ultimately be successful with it catching on?  Seems like something that would have fallen out of favor centuries ago even if it was popular at some point.  Nonetheless IT'S PERSEVERED.  Well done Word.  Another EVENING Mets game tonight.  I was pretty happy with it yesterday!  Solidly felt positive about it.  Wonderful. 
     Got coffee!  Wonderful.  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Watched some VIDEO of most recent upcoming Call Of Duty Games!  It's AMAZING.  It's the exact same game but each new edition the graphics get slowly progressively better.  WAIT NO I SAW A DIFFERENCE.  There was a guy walking around on the roof of a building and then he shot a hole in the roof and dropped down into the building.  I NEVER SEEN PEOPLE SHOOT HOLES INTO THE FLOOR TO DROP INTO LOWER LEVEL.  THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING.  Anyway.  Now all they need to do is have ladders laying around that you can prop up and use anywhere you want.  AMAZING.  Also these graphics look REAL.  I really get the sense I'm shooting at people with a handheld artillery machine gun.  Feels just like it would in real life!  GREAT.
    
Okay.  I'm a solid 20-35 minutes into Final Destination II. In II you can start SHOOTING HOLES INTO THE FLOOR.  Wonderful.  Is there just me or is there plot holes in Final Destination.  Hey I'LL TELL YOU WHERE THERE'S SOME PLOT HOLES it's ON THE ROOF OF THIS BUILDING in The Call Of Duty Video Game Trailer!  What else.  I really wanted to talk about plot holes in final destination!  That wasn't just a set up for that Dumbness.  THESE FILMS DON'T MAKE SENSE COMPLETELY and I'M UPSET ABOUT IT.  What else is going on.  My Dad was VERY excited last night that he found a plot hole or blooper in Titanic.  He told me about it and I haven't seen the movie in 20 years so it seemed reasonable but I don't really remember.  But him being excited made me ANGRY.  I come up with plot holes all the time and I don't go around bragging to people.  That's just the nature of Film.  PLOT HOLES APLENTY.
    
Anyway.  NO his plot hole was not THE TITANIC WAS BUILT SO STURDY AND THEY SAID IT SANK?  DOESN'T ADD UP.  CAN'T HAPPEN IN REAL LIFE.  Although if it was that'd be an amusing anecdote!  What else is going on.  Eighth paragraph!  Some sort of Titanic/Final Destination Crossover.  Seems like there's something there.  I mean, not a REAL something.  But if we're accepting Dumb Somethings which is what this website is all about more or less exactly, then yes, there's a Real Dumb Something there potentially.  Dumb Somethings.  I like the sound of that!  What else is going on.  9/11 and Final Destination Cross Over.  Sure there's Dumb Something there too!  I'd think about it some more but That's INSENSITIVE and I don't play that game.  Gotta imagine that in 1915 people would have been like, "TOO SOON!" if I made a Final Destination/Titanic Joke then too.  People were still upset about it!
     Anyway ninth paragraph.  Also making a Final Destination joke in 1915 would have been MUCH Too Soon because it wouldn't be released for another 85 years.  So people wouldn't understand it!  Gotta hold that joke in my back pocket for EIGHTY FIVE YEARS before putting it to use.  I can't SURVIVE 85 years.  That's pushing it in terms of how long I can expect to live!  Also presumably I wasn't a newborn baby in 1915 because I Had A Joke In My Mind.  So I needed to be conscious enough to have that joke.  So I had to be AT LEAST 4 or 5!  Anyway I lost track of what I was talking about.  Wonderful.  Losing track is great!  Means I get a fresh start sooner rather than later.  Wonderful!  Wow 1500 deaths on Titanic.  That's a lot of mortalities!  What's the breakdown in regards to Class.  How many of them were the upper class and how many were the lower class.  Because IT MATTERS.  I won't say which way is more important, that's up to you to decide!  But PICK A SIDE is the point I'm trying to make.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful!  I don't remember saying a single worthwhile thing but that's life.  Most days we live just plain aren't worthwhile!  Seems fair I don't have a problem with that.  I dunno why I got the calamari.  I mean I guess at the time it seemed reasonable.  But let's face facts it was probably the wrong decision.  Hey that's life.  That's Calamari.  Huh.  I feel like there's a solid 5 Final Destination Films.  Wow FIVE?  That's one for every finger on the hand!  I can count Five TWO TIMES if I had to!  Amazing.  If thumbs are so great for us that that's why we're so advanced imagine how advanced we'd be if we have 2 or 3 thumbs per hand.  I'm just imagining all the different kind of pitches Baseball Players could make!  Probably 20 more pitches they can come up with if they had bonus thumbs.  Hmm gotta imagine there's some Freaks out there with a bonus thumb or too.  They can have pitches all their own in baseball!  FINALLY being a freak is paying off!  The point is the act is over.  I'll be back soon!

 

 

 

 

You Could Have Fooled Me

    Hello friends.  Looks like I'm gonna write act II, take shower, write act III, take walk III!  Then the rest of the day falls into place.  So I got that going for me.  I watched the HISTORIC Mike Piazza homerun from several weeks after 9/11.  The Mets were BEHIND BY ONE RUN in the eighth inning.  He hit a TWO RUN HOMERUN.  The mets take the lead.  THIS IS ONE FOR THE RECORD BOOKS.  Look I'm not impressed okay?  I think I've made my point.  Also was there ever a Sports Headline that Mike Piazza hit a game winning RBI and the headline was PIAZZA DELIVERY!!!  My guess is Yes At Least Once.  Probably several times!  They did it once and then a year later they do it again and someone is like didn't we already do this and then the other guy is like maybe who knows but that's not my problem.
    
That sort of thing.  Pizza Hut has a new promotional pizza that's Detroit Pizza.  You've got MY Attention.  I like pizza so why wouldn't I be interested in new kinds of pizza.  I'd have to be AN IDIOT.  Also it's more likely than not I have never had a Chicago Style Deep Dish Style Pizza.  NEVER!  Gotta imagine I gotta have that before I go to Detroit.  Because the order in which we do things matter for some reason.  Either way Pizza Hut Detroit Dish can't be regular Detroit Dish.  Pizza Hut IN ESSENCE is it's own thing uniformly.  So I gotta find some AUTHENTIC DETROIT DISH pizza.  Damnit!  I'm gonna have to look into this one I guess.  What's going on.  I just lost track of My Life for a solid 60 seconds.  Oh right Saying, "Detroit Dish," and halfway thinking in my mind, "That's kind of funny right?  I don't know why but I HOPE SO at least."  So that's where I'm at in life unfortunately.
    Cool!  Am I gonna take a Fun Shower?  I dunno!  Probably not!  Why bother, that's my official position.  Anyway.  Did the people who make the Titanic ever try to make a new boat afterwards.  You'd think they'd be like well we got into the business of being Prime Super Boat Makers... can't let one mess-em-up ruin that completely.  WE MUST TRY AGAIN.  Or maybe they were like wow we DID NOT do good on that.  We were way off!  Good sign we're not meant to be boat makers.  Hey how do people do that thing where they make boat models inside of wine bottles.  I never got that.  Doesn't seem possible!  Anyway what else is going on.  Oh right I'm still that boat maker guy.  How's that working out for me.  What else is going on.  I bet if we really tried we could sink the Unsinkable Molly Brown.  Sure.
    
Penultimate paragraph of the act.  You've got to survive more than JUST ONE sinking to be called unsinkable.  AT LEAST two or three, and even that really isn't enough for cementing a reputation as being unsinkable.  But just ONE certainly isn't enough!  What else is going on.  Also I assume Molly Brown was a real person but right now I'm just imagining Kathy Bates.  Every time I say Molly Brown I REALLY mean Kathy Bates.  Kathy Bates is sinkable is the point I'm trying to make.  As far as we know!  That'd be my first guess at least given the information we already have available to us.  Anyway.  It's been 2-3 months since I cleaned my bathroom and it's already at the point where it's practically unacceptably dirty.  I mean it's PRETTY acceptably dirty.  But if you were a jerk about it you COULD Make the case that it's not acceptable anyway!  IF your first instinct was to be a JERK.
     Last paragraph before shower!  I don't believe it.  Hey it might be Rosh Hasnuah RIGHT NOW.  For some reason I believe Rosh Hashunah is two days.  Why would a New Years Celebration need to be two days?  I could see for other holidays you might wanna spread it across multiple days.  But to celebrate a new year?  WELL SURE you can celebrate the last day of the year AND the first day of the year.  That's two days.  YEAH but I always imagined Rosh Hashunah was the first 2 days of the year.  I DON'T KNOW and I NEVER WILL KNOW.  The point is I DON'T CARE.  I kind of do care but I don't care AS MUCH AS I SHOULD.  Anyway what else is going on.  Right now I'm leaning towards eating Calamari Lunch COLD.  Then again MICROWAVE would be good too.  OVEN IS NOT WITHOUT ITS CHARMS.  I DON'T CARE!  Not as much as I should.  Wait yes I do!  I should care NOT AT ALL.  If anything I actually care even A LITTLE BIT TOO MUCH.  I don't like the sound of that either!  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

 

Oh Right I Already Said This

    Hello friends.  Time to write the wrest of the entry.  Sure I wrote, "Wrest," I'd do it again!  What do I got in store for upcoming rest of the day.  Take a nice walk and everything.  Then re-calibrate.  Anyway.  Took a bath today for first time in months!  It was pretty good!  It was solidly a step above neutral and into Positive Experience Territory.  Also this is the first time I've taken a bath since bathtub was cleaned as part of entire Bathroom Re-do and it's FUN taking a bath in clean tub.  More SMOOTH.  The bathtub is nice smooth PORCELAIN as opposed to lots of gunk stuck all over it.  So that's something to consider.  I forget why.  I said it, though.  If I said it it must be worth considering to some extent because You've Been Forced To Consider It.  You don't even know you're considering things by reading this but that's EXACTLY what you're doing!  Sorry About That but on the other hand You're Welcome.
    
Cool.  What kind of stuff can I watch on The Television that I would ENJOY.  Not TOLERATE.  I dunno if I'd ENJOY further going through Final Destinations.  It's OKAY enough.  Maybe a bit TOO okay.  Don't get much out of it!  I like the scenes where people DIE.  I feel like that's how we're supposed to approach watching these movies?  Then again it seems like you'd have to be a psychopath to watch films and be like MAN OH MAN SOMEONE IS GONNA DIE SOON THIS IS GONNA BE A BLAST AND A HALF.  Then again I dunno much about Films or Psychopaths and the intersection between them.  I don't know much about anything!  I know roughly 40% of things.  Overall.  All told.  Is that a plurality of things?  I dunno!  I dunno how that would work exactly!  The point is I dunno what else is going on.
     Cool.  I think in an ideal world I'd wanna go with some Steak & Seafood meals starting with Tonight.  This may or may not be an ideal world, though!  HMM kinda REALLY hope I get the Steak & Seafood tonight, then.  Because that would mean We're In An Ideal World.  And the Dinner Itself isn't that big a deal but if it DOES TURN OUT we're in an ideal world man oh man is that gonna start paying off IN A BIG WAY at some point perhaps starting even tonight if not tomorrow!  So we got that to look forward to if I get the kind of Meals I Want.  YEAH.  Cool.  Anyway.  What's the next sign that I could see that would show we're possibly in An Ideal World.  Hmm.  I dunno!  THAT'S WHAT IS IDEAL ABOUT IT.  SURPRISING.  Who doesn't love to be surprised.  It's ideal I guess for some reason!  I guess with good news.  Although being surprised with bad news is maybe better than just knowing bad news.  Wow I was spared being upset about this bad news until This Very Moment so I guess that's good kind of in essence.
    
Not sure about that.  Not sure about a lot of things these days!  Anyway.  Belgian waffle was delicious yesterday.  Chicken curry was delicious yesterday.  This is good stuff let's keep it goin'!  Maybe watch some Final Destination II as Next Thing I Put On.  There's still MORE PEOPLE THAT MUST DIE and if I don't watch it THEN THEIR LIVES WOULD HAVE BEEN FOR NOTHING.  Or their DEATHS would have been for nothing.  Either way.  The point is If I Don't See It why should it have even happened in the first place?  Doesn't add up!  Not 100% completely!  LOOK do I have any Tic Tacs left?  I DON'T KNOW.  Not in my room.  I finished the pack I had going for me for the last week or two.  There may be more in the house or there may not be I DON'T KNOW as of now!  They're called Tic Tacs because you can play tic tac toe with them.  No You Can't.  You could if you had Something Else To Work With, Too!  That is accurate.
    
Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  THEN AGAIN calamari is seafood for lunch.  Seafood for dinner?  I dunno!  One is fried and one is I Wanna Say Broiled OR Baked?  That's DIFFERENT.  I can feel comfortable having different cooked seafood in one day!  I can do whatever I want!  This is one example of something I can do.  Sounds about right.  Anyway.  Still waiting for a Modern Movie about the Hindenburg.  I'm pretty sure they made a Hindenburg movie in the olden days.  But I wanna see one for MY Generation.  I think we've earned as much!  Also I assume Molly Brown was also on the Hindenburg and that's why she's called The Unexplodable Molly Brown.  Did Hindenburg explode.  Or crash.  Or something else.  Better LTURQ.  Caught Fire.  Not sure if it was a full fledged explosion.  NO ONE is really sure as of now!  That's not true.  Yeah but if I say it without qualifying it as not true I could make you think it is true!  What would be my motive though.  Anyway.  The entry is over!  Be back tomorrow!

-1:34 P.M.

 

 

 

 

Tuesday, September 7, 2021

I'm Okay With That

    Hey!  Time to write some more crap.  It's a new day compared to the last day.  It September just like it was yesterday.  So basically some similarities and some differences off the top of my head!  Called Doctor just now because I need to re-up with a medication.  WOW WHAT A STORY.  I didn't tell you the most interesting part yet!  I LEFT A MESSAGE.  Amazing!  Nice Chicken Meal for lunch.  Dinner may be one of several things!  Well it definitely will be one of several things.  But it won't be the other of the several things.  That's the point I'm trying to make.  No it isn't.  Well it's the point I ended up making anyway.  Is any of this legible.  No way of knowing for sure.  Watched a scary horror movie last night Why It Was Only Called Ghostly Encounters.  It's scary because I DON'T LIKE THE CHARACTERS.  I'm scared of having to pretend I like them if I get transported into the movie!
     What else is going on.  There's a sequel available, too!  I can watch that today.  I can do lots of things today.  I got many hours to work with and it's gonna be fun working out what and when I do certain things.  So far one of the top songs I like playing in Rocksmith is We Are Them Champions.  It's fun to listen to and fun to play!  Also it's easy SO FAR.  As it increases in difficulty that may change.  Anyway lots of fun songs on that.  A solid DOZEN I've played and have had fun with!  And gotta imagine when I work my way around to the others those'll be fun too!  I LIKE music.  That's the point I'm trying to make.  Threw out some garbage last night!  I had TEASED that possibility yesterday in entry and lo and behold it manifested itself in reality!  Cool!  Anyway I put Tape back on Cable Box Time.  I didn't like it!  ESPECIALLY when trying to sleep.  I don't need a clock nightlight.  ALSO I don't need to open my eyes here and there and be told what time it is.  So I put the tape back on last night.  I was gonna try to go an entire 24 hours without it because that's the promise I made to myself but I just didn't feel like it!
     YES!  Huh.  Anyway how's the rest of the day lookin.  VERY good.  Because I'm anticipating being done with this entry at some point and then it's all free time after that.  Already called Doctor.  That's the chore for today!  Hmm.  Chicken curry or chicken with sweet potatoe and broccoli.  If I knew what I was gonna have for dinner that'd help me pick a lunch that's more in contrast.  But I DON'T.  Oh no what to do!  What to do.  Hey I know!  Write some more paragraphs.  First goal to aim for is 5 paragraphs down so I can get coffee.  Then, re-assess where I'm at in life!  HEY YOU IDIOTS I just re-upped with Sprite Zero so that's an Accomplishment right there!  Hey let's write some worthwhile stuff.  Have you heard about FUCK I CAN'T THINK OF ANYTHING.  Hey here's some good news what's up with DAMNIT NOTHING.
     Hmm.  Should start figuring out some new music to listen to.  New to ME.  And/or New to THE WORLD.  That sort of thing.  Me and my Dad went through Mini Animal Crackers way too quickly!  We're down to like a half dozen in the box, so basically crumbs.  After 4-5 days!  OH NO WHATTA JIP.  The good news is THERE IS NO GOOD NEWS THIS IS UNIFORMLY BAD.  What the hell kind of cookie I'm supposed to snack on if I don't wanna commit to the amount of calories A Single Regular Cookie Is.  NOWHERE THAT'S WHO.  What else is going on.  Break a regular cookie in half.  I DUNNO ABOUT THAT.  Also now that I think about it what REGULAR cookies do I got left.  Oh no.  OH NO.  OH NO.  Wonderful.  One of the top 2 options for dinner today is WAFFLE.  With EGG WHITES.  And leave over 1/4th of waffle for later and have EGG WHITES instead.  WHY AM I YELLING.  Oh.  For EMPHASIS.
    
Sure.  How are things going with you.  Still reading the entry apparently!  Sorry about that.  The good news is you will have a solid opportunity to Do Something Else quite soon!  When you're FORCED to stop reading here because it's over.  That WILL happen at a point in the relatively near future!  Wow I'm a hero by Not Writing A Never Ending Entry.  Also by doing other things.  I don't think I need to get into specifics but I'm a Hero Many Times Over.  What else is going on.  I help my Dad with GRAMMAR questions for his class.  I've done this EIGHT OR TEN times over the last six months.  Hey this question on the test does this sound right.  Do I need a comma.  Mix up the words.  I'm HELPING because I'M A HERO.  Also the best rule of thumb for grammar questions is go with whatever sounds right.  Who cares what's accurate.  You wanna make sure people understand what you're saying!  Do what sounds right.  EASY.  Coffee time.
     Sure.
  What else is going on.  Ya know what?  Maybe play some CALL OF DUTIES today.  It's called Call Of Duty II.  But II Duty is DUTIES.  The point is sure I can shoot some people on video game.  They're BAD people because they're on the other side of the war.  Deserve to be dead!  It's either them or me.  Not if I don't play the game.  As long as I don't start up the game in the first place We're All Alive.  Hmm I deserve some sort of Nobel Prize for Peace by not playing a video game.  Sounds about right.  How did they first get Nobel Prizes to mean something.  At some point it was just hey I won a Nobel Prize.  What the Hell is that.  Who gives a shit.  At some point people started caring!  WELL DONE by The Nobel Prize people to get people to care.  And VERY WELL DONE by Nobel to make his name associated with The Best Of The Best.  I assume Nobel was a person.  Better LTURQ.  Sir Alfred Nobel of Sweden.  Wow.  Amazing.
     
Sure!!!  Seventh paragraph.  He invented DYNAMITE.  Amazing.  Now that I think about it I feel like that's a piece of trivia I heard before.  Nobel Guy's main contribution to the world was DYNAMITE.  And ya know what?  WELL DONE that's valuable.  At first I was like well that's no good DYNAMITE IS USED FOR WAR.  It can BLOW PEOPLE UP.  But now I Realize ya know for the most part Dynamite it used peacefully and productively.  Blow up DAMS or something.  I dunno why DAM was the first thing that came to mind that could be blown up with dynamite.  There's probably some sort of reason that isn't occurring to me.  Either way well done.  Why are we bowing up dams in the first place.  Replace them with EVEN BETTER DAMS.  Oh okay that checks out.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  Was the Hoover Dam named for Herbert Hoover.  OR was Herbert Hoover named for the Hoover Dam.  Has to be one of them!
     Nope.  Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Why don't I like the characters in Grave Encounters.  They're just regular people doing regular things!  EXACTLY.  I DON'T LIKE regular people.  ESPECIALLY if they're doing regular things.  Oh okay now I get it.  How come there's a whole subgenre of Found Footage Horror Films but NO Found Footage OTHER FILMS.  I'd like a found footage DRAMA.  I'm there there's comedy spoofs of horror films with found footage.  But I want a comedy film that's NOT A SPOOF OR A MOCKUMENTRY that's found footage.  LET'S DO A ROMANTIC COMEDY FOUND FOOTAGE FILM.  You heard it here first.  YES I'M FIRST.  Alright I demand 100% royalties from the film!  Why would you make that film EVER if you're not making anything from it.  For THE JOY OF CONTRIBUTING TO SOCIETY.  AND TO ME.  Society benefits and roughly just as important I benefit!  Sounds like a good reason to do stuff to me.
    
Ninth paragraph!  I don't believe it!  Anyway what else is going on.  Egg whites are great because it's sort of like enjoying eating an egg but healthier.  SURE it doesn't taste as good as eating an egg but you can SORT OF get the sense that yeah this is more or less eating an egg.  I dunno what that observation accomplishes.  Probably not a lot!  But it's how I feel!  So it does accomplish something!  Now you know exactly how I feel re: Eating Egg Whites.  Wonderful.  WE GOT MINI CHIPS AHOY.  PERFECT.  A single Mini Chips ahoy is the amount of calories I'd want from an individual serving of cookie These Days.  When I'm done dieting to lose weight I'LL EAT FULL COOKIES but in the meantime this is where I'm at!  YEAH.  YEAH!  OKAY.  What else is going on.  Anyway.  I was gonna binge-watch Final Destinations.  I LOADED UP the first one.  Then I stopped it roughly 75% into the opening credits.  Got bored!
     Wonderful.  I'd go on a plane.  Planes are fun!  I've only been on planes for a period if 2.5 weeks in my life.  Had an 18 day vacation in 1997!  Either 3 or 4 plane rides overall as it was a MULTI DESTINATION VACATION.  We're talkin FLORIDA.  We're talkin' WASHINGTON DC.  We're talkin' COLONIAL WILLIAMSBURG.  We're talkin LAST TWO ONES WERE DRIVING DISTANCE NOT PLANE.  Amazing.  Gotta imagine 1 out of those 3 destinations was pretty fun.  I don't have to imagine it I can RECOLLECT it.  It's ACCURATE in my memory.  Anyway what else is going on.  On first plane ride ever to Florida I got bumped up to first class because they had an opening and I remember drinking orange juice in a champagne glass and being like ORANGE JUICE?  WOW I CAN GET USED OT THIS!!!  Seemed like the most extravagant thing ever.  Then again if I remember correctly the GLASS WAS pretty extravagant.  But the orange juice itself isn' THAT big a deal.  Hey I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

 

That Sounds Fair

    Hello friends.  Write act II --> Shower --> Walk --> act III!  Those are ARROWS you're looking at.  You can tell what direction they're going in from the, ">," as well.  So there's that!  Gonna have coffee with act III.  I didn't include that in the Arrow Timeline because I FORGOT.  Anyway what else is going on.  I'm WORRIED when I put tape back on cable box I covered up the Signal Receiver.  So if I want to put cable box on or off IT WON'T REGISTER from the remote.  Oh no there's no way to remedy this situation.  Guess I just have to do it manually from now on.  That's life!  Think I'm solidly leaning towards Waffle for tonight.  And chicken with sweet potatoe for lunch.  Because THAT'S LIFE, TOO!  My life!  My life is roughly the most important life out there to me.  Maybe when I have a family of my own I'll care more about their lives.  That's MY decision!
     Oh well what else is going on.  I have a family.  But it's not MY family.  I'm part of THEIR family.  That's how I feel at least.  Anyway.  I dunno.  Haven't gotten any stickers in a few months.  I think the last sticker I got was probably voting for NYC Mayor Primary To Remember.  I remember that day because it was raining very hard but I was taking walks anyway.  AND I feel I was listening to the Kanye/Jay Z album during the walks.  This was probably in Oh I Don't Know JUNE?  Amazing.  ERIC ADAMS won the primary.  I assume his first name is Eric.  And I'm also assuming his last name is Adams!  90% sure it's Adams and 40% sure it's Eric.  But it's a PLURALITY 40%.  YEP ERIC ADAMS.  Would I rather his name be Adam Erics Yes Of Course Who Wouldn't but we have to play the cards we're dealt in life.  Or not play cards.  And do something else with our lives.  Probably that.  Cards are fun as a diversion but if that's our entire lives we're not gonna be very happy overall.  I feel like the plurality of careers I imagined having in high school was Professional/Semi-Professional Poker player.  I never actually was like YEP I'M DOIN' IT!  But in somewhere between the front and back of my head that was one of the main ideas I entertained in my NOT SO WILDEST dreams.
     So there's that.  Now I'm grown up, though.  Don't wanna be a gambler anymore! On the one hand what if I lose?  And on the other hand I dunno who cares.  Eric Adams looks like a good guy!  He's not the most progressive person by a long shot but I just looked at a picture of him and was like I CAN GET USED TO CALLING THIS GUY MR. MAYOR!  I won't have to get used to it because I'm never gonna talk to him at all and even if I did I don't HAVE to call him Mr. Mayor but the point is... I forget... he looks like an okay guy, though!  So there's that.  Also maybe he is progressive my a relatively not-so-long shot.  I'm basing my impressions on IMPRESSIONS I've heard here and there.  Also FACTS.  But not ALL the facts.  Only A FEW of them.  So there's that!  Met game today is in EARLY EVENING.  I don't know how I feel about that!  I'm pretty indifferent to it as of now.  If I thunk more about it I may either solidly Like It or Not Like It but as of now I dunno how to feel so I don't feel strongly about it!  You can't feel strongly about something when you don't know how to feel.  You can be STRONGLY ambivalent.  You can be like I KNOW I WILL feel strongly about this one way or another but I don't know which yet.  The point is I feel strongly that at some point I will have a relatively medium-strength opinion on this thing.  The Met game.  Being at 6:40.  Yeah.
    
Wonderful.  I put Pastrami in microwave yesterday and it worked out pretty good!  I was pleasantly surprised how appropriately cooked it was and whatnot.  So I got that going for me.  It is Still going for me because I still have more pastrami.  Sure I'd like to only get a quarter of a pound so that's one mealsworth.  Had to get half a pound!  Which TURNED OUT TO BE .54 of a pound!  So you can see the kind of situation I'm in.  I forget.  What's going on?  Oh.  Right.  Gotcha.  I'm not hooked on the trailer for the new Chucky TV Show HOWEVER I am starting to realize I have faith in the people making it that they'll do a good job.  ALSO recently it occurred to me people who watch Child's Play for the first time, 30 years ago, before anyone knew what Chucky Was... was it up in the air whether it's possible Andy The Kid was actually doing the murders!?!  Then I watched the first 10 minutes again and was like oh of course not they're very clear that the doll is the killer.  Watching THE FILM.  Maybe in the TRAILER for the first movie it was like is it the kid or the doll?!?!  We'll never tell!!!  Gotta see the movie!!!  So that's something to consider.  I dunno WHY.  You probably got better things to do.
    
Last paragraph of the act!  Then time to take a solid shower.  What else is going on.  I don't know!  That's why I'm not saying anything.  Because I have no idea what else is going on.  I feel like my middle name is Adam so I can relate to Eric Adams in that sense.  Also I've known at least one person named Eric so there's that to consider too.  Also I watched The John Adams HBO Mini Series and he was a politician, too!  Never known anyone named John, though, now that I think about it.  Seems like a pretty big oversight!  Pretty common name!  I've known a JON short for JONATHAN.  No John, though.  Go figure.  Also, YES, this was the Something Else Going On that we've been wondering What It Will Be.  Never known a John.  Well it's good now that we figured that out.  Anyway hey time to take a shower.  I'll be back a little bit later!

 

 

 

If You Say So

    Hello friends.  Time to wrap it up!  Relatively!  It's still paragraphs and tens of minutes away.  DAMNIT.  I wanted to wrap it up IMMEDIATELY.  I can still get there pretty quick.  And besides Not Wrapping It Up just makes the Ultimate Wrapping Of It Up all the more sweeter when it finally occurs!  So there's that.  Gonna pour coffee after this paragraph!  So there's also that!  Think I'm gonna have the chicken curry for lunch.  It has RICE.  I haven't had rice in possible TWO WEEKS.  Delicious.  They throw rice at newly married people.  I guess it's better than throwing pudding at them!  You heard it here first.  That's my new tagline.  I'm gonna make something resembling a joke and then You Heard It Here First!  Seems about right.  They throw rice at newly married people, right?  Better LTURQ exactly.  GOOGLE THROWING RICE AT MARRIED PEOPLE.  Yep checks out completely.
     Well when you put it that way it sounds dumb doesn't it.  Oh well no going back now.  What else is going on.  Coffee!  Delicious!  What else is going on.  Watch some Horror Film.  Dunno about going straight to the sequel to the movie I enjoyed last night.  I want A DIFFERENT KIND of horror film.  My tastes are very particular!  Maybe a film I've watched many times and will enjoy again.  How about Final Destination.  I dunno if I watched that MANY times.  Probably, I dunno, 4-8 times.  That's a pretty good amount of times but there's films I've watched dozens of times.  THAT'S many times.  So basically I forget why I was talking about things that are dumb but oh wait now I remember because I want this to end sooner.  It's all coming back to me.  Don't have any ZOOM appointments until next week.  I told you yesterday or the day before I was gonna look into that and I keep my promises!!! The ones I remember at least!  Also some of the ones I remember I don't keep!  But all things being equal I'd probably err on trying to keep promises rather than going out of my way to not keep the promise!
     Sure, great.  What else is going on.  COOKIE making the start for the New York Metropolitans this evening!  Wonderful!  He's on my fantasy baseball team.  And I can't FULLY blame him for my team underperforming!  So he's got that going for him is the point.  He's not responsible at all.  Not a huge part of my team one way or another.  The point is Great.  Also I'm the one who added him to my team so anything he does is really On Me.  Gotta take responsibility for things!  That's how I feel this paragraph.  Got some fresh garbage can/bags in my room and bathroom.  Really should make the most out of this situation while I can before they start to get filled up relatively rapidly.  Huh.  What else is going on.  I haven't even put the garbage bags into the garbage cans yet.  I really should do that before I start throwing things out.  Yep that totally makes sense.
    
Penultimate paragraph!  I don't believe it.  I guess.  Oh, right.  People named John.  Never in my life!  I don't think so at least.  WHAT OTHER common names have I never met.  Gonna have to look at a list of common names for easier inspiration.  NO.  I'M PUTTING MY FOOT DOWN.  I WILL NOT LOOK AT A LIST OF COMMON NAMES TO DETERMINE THE MOST COMMON NAMES OF PEOPLE WHICH I HAVE NEVER MET.  You heard it here first.  What else is going on.  I finished the coffee.  I don't know how I feel about that.  On the one hand Yes more coffee would be delicious.  On the other hand?  I'm kinda coffee-full!  I don't NEED more coffee is my gut feeling.  So it's served it's purpose is the point.  Anyway.  How soon after this entry will I take my next walk.  Oh I Don't Know THIRTY TO FORTY FIVE MINUTES?  I phrased that as a question but it's really a declarative statement.  Thirty to forty five minutes.  Yep.  Wonderful. 
    
Wow!  The good news is I Forget.  Delicious RICE coming up.  And only HOURS after that is delicious WAFFLE.  FIVE hours.  I dunno about you guys but I have 2 real meals a day and the time period between them is consistently right about FIVE HOURS.  Give or take no more than 15 minutes either way!  And guess what, it's been working out for me!  No complaints at all about it.  So I got that going for me.  I'd consider Freedom Chip Pancakes but I still have 1/3rd of 1 pancake for a breakfast in the fridge from last time!  I can't get something where I already have the leftover from the last time!  It would be Irresponsible and most of all Dumb!  YES I could have eaten that for today's breakfast so I COULD get it again tonight but I decided to have something else instead!  I stand by my decision!  I have no choice!  It's been made and that's that.  Anyway hey the entry is over.  That's great news for everybody.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-2:25 P.M.

 

 

 

Monday, September 6, 2021

This Seems Familiar

    Hi friends!  I'm back here to do more stuff.  Very similar to the stuff I did yesterday!  More or less the same thing most likely.  Anyway got some SPRITE ZERO going on.  Delicious!  I can SEE THROUGH this soda.  Very convenient!  Now I know what's on the other side of the glass for sure!  Uh-oh small carbonation bubbles are visible and are obstructing my view.  Great nothing's ever easy is it.  Some things are easy.  I can't think of any off the top of my head but I'm sure that's accurate.  The first thing that I thought of was Pitching in MLB Video Game from 10 years ago.  But that's NOT easy.  VERY hard.  So basically after that I gave up trying to think of something that's easy.  Anyway.  Been wearing SHIRT the last few months when undressed for end of day along with boxers.  Normally I'd just wear boxers but I don't wanna be reminded me my fat stomach by not wearing a shirt and looking down on occasion.  Yesterday I decided to see how it goes without a shirt and NO PROBLEM.  I'm thin enough to not wear a shirt now!  YEAH.
    
Wonderful.  I wonder where else I can stop wearing shirts.  Presumably other places around the house at the very least.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna have a nice Pastrami sandwich for lunch today.  Dinner is anyone's guess!  POSSIBLY.  Just because anyone made a guess doesn't mean that's what my dinner is gonna be!  In fact they're most likely gonna be wrong.  But it's POSSIBLE they get it right and I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  Maybe an OMELET.  I haven't had an omelet in a long time.  I'm due for an omelet!  Probably LEO.  It's HEALTHIER because fish instead of meat.  Get off my back about it!  The L is for LOX.  Lox is Salmon.  Salmon is a fish.  Fish is thing in water.  Water is thing in oceans.  And of course we all know what oceans are so we don't need to go any further.
    
Wonderful.  Maybe binge watch The Critic.  I have it on the Digital Video Discs.  I can go through that for roughly the I wanna say sixth or seventh time completely?  Probably seventh.  Sixth seems to low.  Seventh seems JUST right.  Fascinating.  It's a good show because it makes you laugh.  Also it's animated so there's no stress of having to look at real people.  REAL people?  On TV?  I Don't Think I'm Comfortable With This!  That's how I feel.  Then again I wanna binge a DRAMATIC.  Then again what else is going on.  Watched the pilot of Futurama.  Wait a second.  Futurama.  Pastrami.  FUTURE AMA.  PAST (r) AMI.  I'm confused.  I confused myself!  What else is going on.  I remember watching Futurama BEFORE it was cool.  And then I remember stopping watching it AFTER it was cool.  It's a great show to watch when nothing else is on!  Hilarious AND Very Bright Colors Nice Fun To Look At!  But good luck motivating yourself to go ahead and watch it on your own!
    Really, good luck!  I think you'll have a blast and a half if you can accomplish that.  Anyway hey the fourth paragraph.  Gonna go get coffee after this one!  That'll make my life relatively better.  Sounds about right.  Maybe watch some SHUTTER horror film in a little bit after entry is done.  I feel like watching one from the 1980's with nudity.  Good nudity!  Not mediocre nudity.  I wanna watch ADEQUATE nudity.  But nothing from before 1980's!  That could be MY MOTHER naked.  Not into that!  Not even a little bit!  Some people are a little bit BUT NOT ME.  I'm assuming.  Ugh.  Also I will be happy with 1990's nudity but NOT anything more than that.  That could be MY IMAGINARY SISTER NAKED.  Not into that.  Maybe a little bit!  Wait no.  Not even a little bit!  That sounds more accurate.  Gonna get coffee after next paragraph.  I changed my mind!  Get off my back about it.
     Great.  What else is going on.  Mets have a day game for the third time in a row.  I hope someone lost their job over that.  First day game was part of double header.  Wasn't part of the original schedule.  Still I hope someone lost their job over that because I'm a vindictive person and I get off on people losing their jobs.  Sounds about right.  I watched Anaconda: The Film yesterday and it wasn't bad!  I like the part where they're on a boat.  Boat huh.  I could get on board with this!  I'd be on a boat too if I had the chance.  Hmm maybe I'd LOVE Jungle Cruise.  Also I like Disney World.  Why wouldn't I want to watch a movie based on  Disney World ride?  Because it's probably dumb.  GREAT Dumb is Fun.  That's my ammendum to Wit is shit and funny is money.  Dumb is Fun.  Kinda overlap with funny is money.  Also did I just come up with those things in my imagination?  I feel like I heard them somewhere Outside My Head but who can say for sure. 
    Anyway.  Hi!  It's me again.  From before.  Sure.  I wish I could heat up Pastrami properly.  I could have it cold-- fine!  I could put it in microwave-- doesn't taste great hat way!  I can't do a third thing!  Put it in oven I guess.  I dunno.  Never thought seriously about that but now that I mention it maybe that COULD work.  Or I could eat it cold.  Maybe.  People eat deli meat cold all the time!  That's why they're called cold cuts.  Either that or because you're supposed to Cut It COLD.  Or they're cuts endorsed by "Stone Cold" Steve Austin.  The point is I forget.  Oh.  Right.  Maybe actually try pastrami in oven!  It's about time I try new things!  Had a  nice grahamed cracker for breakfast today.  Not your mini graham cracker.  We're talking about A HALFWAY HEARTY Graham Cracker!  Hmm that reminds me of a Tales From The Crypt The Summer To Remember Savings Event episode.  I believe it's titled Halfway Horrible.  And THAT reminds me hey I can watch some Tales later today.
    
Wonderful.  I guess!  If only the last time I watched Sopranos was 3-6 months before it was, I'd be due to bingewatch it again now before Movie comes out.  However it's JUST recent enough that I watched it that I can't very well watch it again quite yet.  Also who cares.  I SOLIDLY remember 90% of things that happen!  Or at least 90% of the things I absorbed.  Maybe 50% of the things that happen in The Sopranos I haven't even picked up on yet.  But that's besides the point.  I dunno I feel like it's close to the point.  YES that's what I said IT'S RIGHT BESIDE THE POINT.  Very close!  What part of POINT don't you understand?  Huh.  Look if you don't think I'm considering being a proponent of diner for tonight specifically so I could get a Sweet Breakfastcentric meal again You're An Idiot!  I'm due for a WAFFLE though this time.  I can live with that!  Maybe get a side of egg whites.  Eat 75% of the waffle and all the egg whites!  Delicious AND the other thing.  I wanna say Nutritious.  No that doesn't sound right.
    
Huh.  All eggs are white.  Untrue I've seen some brown eggs.  I got myself there.  Anyway eighth paragraph!  We're gettin' there!  I don't think I've ever had fancy eggs from an animal that isn't I wanna say chicken?  I've had Eggos.  Where are they from?  Huh.  The point is can we eat embryos that don't come with hard egg shells.  Gotta imagine there's some menstruations that are delicious and nutritious that we just don't have to crack open.  Also Yes it's very possible I Don't' Know How Eggs work.  But the point is get off my back about it.  Anyway.  You can't make an omelet without cracking a few eggs.  Of course you can.  Get someone else to crack the eggs for you.  Well then aren't they making the omelet?  No if you do everything else you're solidly the one making the omelet.  If this other guy helps out a little bit more then he's solidly assisting you.  But as of now it's pretty much all you.
    
Huh.  Happy labor day.  I do work.  I don't get paid for it!  But you can solidly consider some of the stuff I do work.  So I feel like today is in celebration of me as well as others.  It's ABOUT TIME.  Anyway better live it up today because tomorrow we're back to no one is celebrating me.  GREAT this day is FOR THE WORSE.  I wasn't even THINKING about not being celebrated but now that I am I realize it's gonna be all over in 12, 13 hours!  You got my spirits up and FOR WHAT.  For NOTHIN'.  Also I don't have a job.  Maybe today isn't for me at all.  Oh well it was nice to be celebrated for 90 seconds is the point.  I guess.  When's arbor day.  April?  Probably April.  That's when Trees Live.  Hey it is April.  I'm either some kind of genius or I saw it was April yesterday when I googled it.  I feel like I'm Some Kind Of A Genius.  Also what kind of genus of tree are we planting.  That sort of thing.
    
Last paragraph before the break!  I guess.  Maybe I can just watch a horror movie and pornography separate.  Why should I do that when I can multitask!  Also I don't wanna commit myself to a full fledged pornographic viewing.  I just want to be TITILLATED for 10 seconds 2 or 3 times.  That's it!  I don't need OR WANT anything more than that for the immediate future.  So get off my back about it.  Oh hey look at the time.  Pretty good time for where I'm at in First Third OF Day Schedule.  Which is the main part of schedule that's scheduled.  On track to have a real nice day, sure, great, wonderful.  HMM maybe I should take off masking tape from cable box?  I feel like I'm at a point in my life where it couldn't hurt to see what time it is explicitly much more often.  Then again it COULD hurt.  But then again it MIGHT NOT.  But then again WHY MESS WITH SUCCESS.  But then again STANDARD WAY TO LIVE LIFE IS WITH CABLE BOX TIME.  Anyway I'll think about it.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

That's One Way To Look At It

    That's great, just great.  I'm back here with act II!  Then gonna take a shower, take a walk, the nwrite act III!  As well as catching up on beginning of Mets Game after that walk.  As well as drinking coffee with act III.  Also hey great what else is going on.  My thumb is bleeding.  What did I do to deserve this.  All I did was bite off some skin around the edge of the nail.  I hardly see why I should be bleeding because of that.  Doesn't seem fair!  Anyway.  What percent of people who bite their nails also bite the skin around their nails.  Better LTURQ.  Doesn't look common.  Also nail biting is okay but biting skin around nails is A DISORDER?  That hardly seems fair!  I'm just taking it to the next level!  If anything I should be REWARDED and PRAISED for this.
     Anyway what else is going on.  Got some more SPRITE ZERO going on.  Delicious!  I feel like Sprite is marketed towards black people.  I don't know what I'm basing that on.  It just sounds about right.  Anyway things that are marketed towards black people are really marketed towards everyone because it's a stereotype that black people are trendsetters.  So if you can get black people on board with your soda it's only a matter of time before everyone wants to drink your soda.  ALSO sports.  Is that part of the equation?  YES.  Sports are ALWAYS part of the equation when it comes to Sprite Marketing.  Fascinating.  Also I feel if only I had saved EVERY nail and BIT OF SKIN I ever bit off I would have enough raw materials to Make A Frankenstein.  Well halfway there at least.  I dunno about a FULL Frankenstein.  Hmm what if I made a Dwarf Frankenstein.  I have enough material if The Frankenstein's Monster I'm making is 3 feet tall!  See it's called being RESOURCEFUL that's all that is.
    
Wonderful.  What else is going on.  At first I was worried I'd have to rush to fit in shower before walk but I think I'm gonna get there pretty easily at this point.  So there's that.  HMM I've been wearing the same pair of socks for a week.  I don't know why.  I could easily put on a new pair.  And the pairs are exactly the same so there's no question of Comfort or Style Differences.  I just feel like I can always get a little bit more out of this pair of socks so why not stretch it another day.  That's how I feel.  It's called being RESOURCEFUL get off my back about it.  Hmm better check my notes to see if I have any Zoom Appointments this upcoming week.  I think I do next week.  Off the top of my head!  But I took Exact Notes just for this kind of situation!  See and you all doubted me re: Taking Notes.  You thought it was pointless!  NOW WHOSE POINTLESS.  YOU!  YOU ARE WITHOUT POINT.  So there's that.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it!  Enjoying these mini animal crackers A BIT too much.  We're talking I'VE HAD A DOZEN ALREADY TODAY and it's barely noon!  A DOZEN OF THESE CRACKERS?  THAT'S GOTTA BE UPWARDS OF SIX CALORIES.  Oh no.  OH NO.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  That's why I asked you!  There was no question mark and even if there was you would have no way of knowing I was actually proposing a question AND if it was actually directed to specifically you but NOW YOU DO KNOW and you better come up with some answers FAST.  That sort of thing.  Anyway it's Rosh Hashanah and we're supposed to eat Apples And Honey and I feel like one of the flavor of the mini animal crackers is HONEY so basically I'm fulfilling my yearly duties as A Jewish.  Hmm is it the duties for last year or for upcoming year.  Upcoming year, right?  If I didn't do duties last year Oh Well Too Late.  But now I've got upcoming year totally covered so it's not all bad!
     Cool.  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine somethin.  Whether it occurs to me or not is up in the air.  Anyway.  I'm leaning towards taking masking tape off cable box!  But keeping it.  This is only a 24 hour test run trial basis.  If I' mnot 100% satisfied I can put the tape right back on.  Probably.  It might have lost its stickiness by then.  Worst case scenerio I need to get some new tape to put on.  That's the WORST case scenario.  Hey I spelled scenario right that time as opposed to wrong the first time.  See?  And YOU thought writing this website was pointless. I'm LEARNING how to spell SCENARIO on my first try EASILY.  Great.  Gonna throw out some garbage tonight.  I do that all the time!  But it's almost always communal garbage from kitchen and whatnot.  Tonight in addition to that I'm throwing out MY ROOM GARBAGE as well as MY BATHROOM GARBAGE.  Wow my rooms will be SUPER clean!  In the garbage can area specifically!  Other than that about the same cleansileness as before!  I'll be back a little bit later.

 

 

 

You Know What I Mean

    Hello friends.  Back here to write the rest of the entry!  I got an hour before I wanna take my next walk.  I should be able to accomplish five dumb paragraphs within that time frame pretty easily.  What if I want to accomplish five SUPER dumb paragraphs.  Well you'd think that would go even quicker, right?  WRONG.  The more dumb something is the longer it takes.  Not because of EFFORT but causation working the other way!  Taking long to write stuff leads me to settle for writing dumber stuff!  So there's that.  What else is going on.  Mets game is TIED UP going into the third inning.  Wow!  A Tie game!  That's probably roughly the most common way for a baseball game to be.  Not a majority of the time.  A plurality of a time!  FASCINATING.  I like it when one team is up by ONE RUN and ONLY ONE RUN.  And it could be EITHER TEAM.  Hmm one run, hmm, one team is ahead which I like but the other team IS RIGHT BEHIND 'EM.
    
Fascinating.  Got coffee going!  I don't believe it.  I talked with my Dad and we're in agreement that any kind of Delivery Place is okay.  Right now I changed my mind and am thinking about pizza.  It tastes good because of the grease left over from mopping up the plurality of the grease!  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Today is still the weekend.  Three day weekend!  Labor Day!  Then again a Celebration Day should be celebrated SOMBERLY.  Should be an ANTI-weekend day.  It's even more of a slog than regular weekdays because of how much we need to consider whatever day it is.  Oh well what can ya do.  Not much!  I've looked into it and there's very little we can do re: this situation circumstance.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Also with pizza I rarely get a 2nd thing where I have food left for tomorrow.  And the 1st thing I get is never a 2 parter.  So I can have super market chicken meal tomorrow for lunch which I like because I Bought It So Now I Have To Eat It.
     YEAH.  YEAH!  Anyway.  Also is taking the day off for labor day some sort of oxy-moron?  My guess?  No, not really.  Oh well that's life.  A slice with garlic.  A slice with anchovie.  Delicious!  I can imagine myself eating a piece of anchovie and being like ya know what half the time I get anchovie I regret it but this time is one of the other times where I'm enjoying it.  That SCENERIO is playing out in my mind and I LOVE IT.  I wonder if I could ask for double anchovie.  I probably could.  No one is gonna stop me.  ALSO they probably'll even do it!  Then again I don't want it!  Single anchovie is plenty let's talk about it.  I could get both slices with both toppings and then remove the toppings from one slice each and add it to the other slice.  Yep that'll do the trick.  OR just ask for double topping.  I'm sure they'll do that.  Nah I like my way better.  Anyway.  Also I DON'T REMEMBER SAYING I wanted double garlic!
     What else is going on.  Penultimate paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  I dunno.  What's the Cleveland Guardians 3 letter abbreviation.  CLG?  That's off the top of my head.  GUA.  GRD.  Maybe they already announced this better LTURQ.  I don't mean to alarm you but I'M NOT SEEING ANY INFORMATION ON THIS.  Wait a second weren't the Indians just CLE.  They can keep that.  NO THEY CAN'T!  FRESH START.  NEED A NEW ONE I feel very strongly about this.  What else is going on.  Gotta think of something new to feel very strongly about.  Already got bored of feeling strongly about the last thing which I believe was abbreviations for Cleveland.  Oh, right.  They can't keep CLE.  Because they need a fresh start.  That's what I was feeling strongly about!  It's all coming back to me. 
     Last paragraph.  Wonderful!  I dunno whatta do with the rest of the day.  Watch some FILMS.  Some TELEVISION Programs.  Hey what time is it.  And I Want The Cable Box To Tell Me.  No one else tell me.  Hmm.  HEY IT'S 577!  WAIT A SECOND NO.  That's the channel.  Well this was an unexpected urn of events!  Okay now it's 2:03.  I had done something with the Live TV/Recent Past TV buttons and I guess that triggered Channel On Cable Box instead of Time.  So there's that.  Huh.  I don't wanna know what channel it is EVER.  This has been a big mark against cable box re: keeping itself untaped.  What else is going on.  Oh hey the entry is over.  Well, soon.  I really should write a few more sentences.  Hey how are things going with you.  Great.  Wonderful.  I hope you survive another 24 hours until the next entry.  I hope you THRIVE another 24 hours.  Good luck with all that!  See ya tomorrow.

-2:05 P.M.

 

 

 

Sunday, September 5, 2021

Did You Say Something

    Hello friends.  Today is today!  I don't believe it.  What kind of wonderful stuff is in store for today.  Maybe some chewing gum.  HEY I've woken up in the middle of the night three nights in a row now and BINGED on chewing a piece of gum to help me fall back asleep.  Which seems not so bad HOWEVER I end up with an odd number of gum.  Gum comes in even packages.  That's obvious.  I chew two pieces at once NORMALLY.  However if I chew one piece of gum at night, and there's an odd number of nights, OH NO EVERYTHING IS OUTTA WHACK.  I figure it they sold gum in odd amounts they'd get a lot of angry letters.  Unless it's 15. Divisible by Five.  I can see that.  Well five is too low and 25 is too high.  So 15 is really the only thing they can get away with.  Wonderful.  What about 9.  A nice 3x3 packaging.  Kinda low amount for gum.
    
Anyway.  Nice September day outside.  Inside, too!  It's September Day EVERYWHERE in this time zone for this amount of time.  HEY I'm in pain slightly in my mouth.  We're talkin' the upper right section of mouth.  Gum-type area.  Mouth gum.  Not Chew Gum.  Although maybe chew gum is what instigated this!  Well gotta imagine this'll go away on its own.  It's fun to imagine it because it means I don't need to do anything.  Anyway.  Got bison burger for 1 meal today.  Chicken Super Market meal for other meal!  Probably Kids Meal.  Hmm I'd get a Happy Meal from a Macdonalds.  Or a Big Kids meal from Burger King.  Burger King had a kids meal analogous to Happy Meal.  Then Right Around The Time I was becoming a Big Kid they introduced a BIG KIDS Meal. Which is more than a kids meal but less than a value meal.  HEY I'M IN FIFTH OR SIXTH GRADE THIS IS PERFECT FOR ME I'M A BIG KID.  Also gotta imagine I would get the Big Kids Meal plus Three Sides.  And One or Two Of The Sides Is Just More Hamburgers.
     YEAH.  I'd eat a value meal.  You can't argue with that value!  Presumably!  It'd be illegal to call it a value meal if it wasn't appropriately valued.  Anyway.  I'd eat some cafeteria food.  School cafeteria!  Hook me up with some of THAT!  Anyway how come there's not a chain of Cafeterias.  I'm sure some eateries border on cafeteria type food and atmosphere and guidelines but no one really gets it done.  Also since we're adults we can get WHATEVER WE WANT.  No one's gonna tell me whether I should get chicken fingers or a Jamaican Beef Patty.  Also I CAN GET BOTH.  No limit to 1 meal per student.  WE'RE ADULTS LETS GO NUTS.  Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe there's cafeterias for homeless and the house-ed poor.  GOD DAMN LUCKY BASTARDS.  Also YES we better be allowed to bring our own sack lunch to Adult Cafeteria and eat for free.  It's allowed to bring in outside food AND there's no entrance fee.  I feel very strongly about this.
   
Also yes there are Adult Cafeterias all over the place.  Like in hospitals or other places where you need to eat sometimes.  BUT a) not full fledges SCHOOL cafeterias and b) you can't just GO there to get the cafeteria.  You have to be in the building or compound for something else already.  I want a place where it's like HEY LETS GO TO THE SCHOOL CAFETERIA TONIGHT.  Look is this all falling apart YES but the underlying point remains and I'll stand by that TO THE DEATH.  Well maybe not to the death.  I'll stand by it as long as there's no consequences at all.  WHAT THE HELL The Mets have an early game again today?  Sounds... I DON'T KNOW.  At first I was like I DUNNO ABOUT THAT TOO EARLY I WAS PICTURING A LATER GAME IF ANY.  Now I think HEY I CAN GET INTO THIS SURE WHY AM I YELLING I NEED TO CALM DOWN.  The point is I'm going to get coffee after the next paragraph.  Was that part of my Thought Response to The Mets.  Or am I just saying it now.  Also, All This.  What Else Is Going On.
    
Cool!  Dominic Smith is on the BEREAVEMENT List but they never said who he's bereaving!  I need DETAILS.  I don't really need them but I wouldn't MIND them.  I had a Hebrew School teacher named Mr. Braverman.  Is that relevant?  Also spelling may be off.  But the point is sure great.  The main thing I learned in Hebrew School was the holiday where there's three walls attached to your house and you celebrate it by having one wall missing.  I believe it's called SUKOT.  Not sure if that is real.  Now that I think about it I could be way off.  Oh well what else is going on.  I feel like in the last year or the penultimate year of Hebrew School we would skip class and play Dreidel in an alcove for money.  And when I was doing it I thought we were being rebels.  In retrospect I feel like the Hebrew School Teachers and Administrators would be proud of us!  They think they've learnt nothing of Jewishness but HERE THEY ARE PLAYING WITH A DREIDEL Mission Accomplished!  I wonder what we were missing in class.  We were done learning Hebrew.  At that point either we got it a little bit or not at all.  But we've moved on!  We learnt history.  I dunno what was left.  Anyway what else is going on.
    
Wonderful.  I got coffee!  I had SIX Mini Animal Crackers.  Which are all in the shape of bunnies.  So Bunny Crackers I guess.  SIX?!?!  That's 25 calories overall!  Also sure I have two at a time.  Which is still very little to chomp on!  If I was really doing it to the extreme I'd be popping in six or eight at a time.  YEAH.  I got coffee going on.  Delicious!  It occurred to me HEY there hasn't been a school shooting lately!  Then I realized oh right it's the summer.  Even still there is summer school!  And let's face it the kids most likely to shoot up the school are in summer school.  UNDERACHIEVERS.  I dunno if that's accurate.  Could easily be the overachievers that snap and shoot up schools.  Then again there's more motivation for bad students because this will expunge their permanent record.  Or at least replace it with a more relevant record.  However Gotta imagine it doesn't look good on college application if you did a school shooting.
     Anyway.
  Seventh paragraph.  Yeah!  Maybe play some ROCKSMITH soon.  I'm in the mood RIGHT NOW but I don't want to disrupt morning routine.  So gotta hold that on in my back pocket for early afternoon.  Also maybe I should be holding onto it in my front pocket if its really important.  That way I can keep an eye on it a little bit better.  Anyway.  I don't think anyone has ever stolen anything from me in my pocket.  I feel like they warn you about that when taking New York Public Transportation.  Especially CROWDED transportation.  But I never had a problem!  The closest I came was I dropped my glasses on the floor and they broke.  But that was actually the opposite because not only did no one steal my broken glasses but another public transporter FOUND THEM and HANDED THEM TO ME.  So the point is don't worry about getting robbed, 9 out of 10 times a stranger will GIVE YOU something not take it away.
    
Wonderful.  Also I think part of the story is I didn't realize I dropped my glasses???  I dunno I think I would have realized it even if I was moderately drunk.  Anyway what else is going on.  Eighth paragraph!  Tomorrow is LABOR Day.  Not ARBOR Day.  LABOR Day.  What's arbor day.  Is that a day where they celebrate trees or something.  Arbor has to do wit trees, right?  What am I thinking of.  YES I WAS RIGHT.  It's a day where you celebrate planting trees.  Go figure.  Arbor Day: They Have The Meats.  What else is going on.  I'm not sure if I've EVER had an Impossible Patty.  I've had Veggie Burgers and patties and whatnot.  But a full fledged IMPOSSIBLE something?  Not yet!  Well it's high time I did.  I guess so.  Get off my back about it, though!  I'll take care of it IN MY OWN TIME okay? 
     Ninth paragraph!  Rosh Hashanah coming up.  I believe this year is The Year Of The Rat.  Also in real life I was born either in The Year Of The Rat or The Year Of The Dragon.  In Chinese Years.  Better LTURQ.  Year of the dragon.  GREAT.  I was EXCITED about being the Year OF The Rat because it's got CHARACTER.  Dragons?  I can take or leave dragons.  Also I believe Dragons have something to do with Sagittarius.  I don't know WHY.  I don't know LOTS of things.  I got jalepeno peppers on my bison burger for today!  Which is good because the last time I got them I didn't like them on the burger so this time I'm DUE to like them!  See I'm sort of a meal planning genius.  I'm sort of a meal planning genus.  Huh.  How about that.  Anyway.  How come there's a special Bereavement list you can go on but not for other upsetting things in life.  What if you're just having A No Good Horrible Very Bad Day.  But without someone dying.  How come there's no list for that BUT if your GRANDMA dies you can take some time off.  DOESN'T SEEM RIGHT.
    
Wonderful.  Maybe I have gum cancer from the Cancer Crackers.  I don't think cancer shows up that quickly.  But then again what do I really know about cancer.  Not a lot!  I thought I knew it doesn't show up that quickly but apparently I was wrong!  Hey I haven't had a tobacco cigarette in 2 and a half years!  For a long time it looked like well pretty good odds I'm suffer Lung Problems a little bit later on.  Also HEY Gum problems and whatnot too.  Oh well what can ya do.  And NOW it looks like well probably will avoid that because I STOPPED.  Shows how much you know!  Huh?  Oh.  Right.  Sure.  What else is going on.  I DID NOT take a seventh walk yesterday.  Just didn't make sense the way my schedule shook out!  But the good news is who cares its meaningless.  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit. 
 

 

 

 

What Have I Done

    Hello friends.  Back here to write 5 paragraphs then take a nice shower break then write 5 more paragraphs.  That sort of thing!  I'm a FAN of how it's starting to get cooler outside.  One day I hope to start wearing my sweatshirt jacket again.  For comfort and for style.  That's just the kind of LOOK I'm going for!  Black sweatshirt jacket?  Great.  Grey sweatshirt jacket?  Also great!  Black is slightly lighter.  Wait a second grey is slightly lighter.  IN COLOR.  But black jacket is slightly lighter in SUBSTANCE.  So that's for slightly warmer days and grey is for cooler days.  I can't just go by STYLE I have to go by SUBSTANCE COMFORT.  You heard it here first.  Maybe you heard it somewhere else first.  But the point is By Now you've definitely heard it.
    
Great.  Gonna have coffee #2 with act #3!  I feel very strongly about this.  Watched a nice fun Shutter movie yesterday.  Really dumb and the plot didn't exist in anyway I'm comfortable with but it had FUN stuff constantly happening.  That's all you can ask for from a movie!  Wait.  No.  You can ask for a plot that exists in a way we're comfortable with.  In fact you can DEMAND IT.  Threaten to Boycott The Movie if they don't have a plot to your liking.  Say I'M NOT GONNA SEE THIS MOVIE UNTIL THERE'S A BETTER PLOT.  What can they do?  They need people to see the movie otherwise they're a failure.  Gotta give the people what they want!  I lost track of what I was talking about.  Oh, right.  Okay.  Gotta wonder if there's a commentary track on the Armageddon DVD and if it's Billy Bob Thornton along with some supporting characters who also worked for NASA and they're in quasi-character and treating the film as if they're at Control Base in NASA and talking about how the movie is going like it was a rocket ship they were monitoring.  Huh.
    
Wonderful!  What else is going on.  I forget.  Wonder what kind of film I'll watch today.  Maybe watch a GOOD film.  Instead of Dumb Silly Horror Film watch an Adequate Serious Horror Film.  Well I'm not 100% happy with either of those.  Ideally a film would be a COMBINATION.  And be an Adequate Silly Film Film.  That's the sort of thing I'm after!  HEY I should get my Dad to help me cut my hair soon.  Maybe in about a month.  That'll be six months since last haircut!  Wonderful!  Also I can shave at the same time.  For convenience sake!  The point is some people can get regular haircuts now but I'm not a regular person who can get some haircuts now.  Because I live with THE VULNERABLE.  What else is going on.  I'm looking forward to this act being done so I can do The Next Thing.  Which in this case is taking a shower.  I feel that VERY often near the end of acts.  Waiting for them to be done.  Because The Next Thing is REALLY gonna be a blast and a half.
     Wonderful.  How is this the end of the act.  When I started that sentence it was only HALFWAY through.  Past halfway is near the end.  That's not too controversial an assessment.  What kind of assessments would be too controversial.  I don't feel like ANY assessments I've made recently are controversial at all.  I STEER CLEAR of controversy because I don't want to alienate people!  That's how I feel.  Then again RATS ARE BETTER THAN DRAGONS.  I can say that because I'M a dragon.  What else is going on.  Let's face it Anything That Exists is better than a dragon.  They're not real!  They're not good Tangibly In Substance at all!  They offer NOTHING on account of BEING Nothing!  Rats on the other hand spread the bubonic plague.  So you can easily make an argument Rats Hurt More Than They Help.  However THEY HELP US TEST THINGS.  Like DRUGS and MAZES.  Without rats how would we ever figure out how to beat mazes?  Right?  That's how it works.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I guess!  Also maybe rats can help spread disease to our enemies.  So gotta look at the glass half full side of everything.  Some people who get the bubonic plague may have it comin'!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also rats power things by running on wheels.  I'm assuming those times you see rats running on a wheel, the premise of that is it's attached to a lightbulb to power a lightbulb.  That's why those scenarios exist.  To harness KINETIC ENERGY from the rat into something USEFUL.  Like a lightbulb for example!  Anyway what else is going on.  Then again maybe its the lightbulb that is giving Power to the rat which helps him run more easily.  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.  Hey it's time to take a ShowerBreak.  I'll be back soon!

 

 

 

Get With The Program

    Hello friends.  Time to write act III!  Then take a walk.  My Dad is taking a walk soon and I'm fitting in walk before him but that requires I'm ready to take my walk in 30-35 minutes from now.  I can finish entry in that time.  Easy!  It's also reasonable I can't.  Solid reasonable possibility!  But if that happens I'm Taking A Break From Entry To Take Walk.  I don't wanna hold my Dad's Day up!  That would make me a bad son and if there's twelve things I want to be one of those twelve is a Good Son.  So I got that going for me.  I suppose.  My Dad wants to get a delivery tonight but I should eat food I have in the house!  I dunno if I'm being a Good Son there or a Bad Son.  I'd help my Dad pad out the delivery if that made me a good son.  However being responsible and getting super market meals out of the way may make me An Even Better Son!
    The point is if I write this act quickly that makes me a good son.  No question about that!  That's just a certainty.  Anyway I dunno.  I can spend 90% of my day not living on a good son/bad son spectrum.  Totally put that out of my mind!  Focus on one of the other Eleven Things I Want To Be.  Anyway.  Hey I can look into Being A Rat.  That's something I apparently want to be.  Well if you've gotta be a rat or a dragon it's a rat.  That says Very Little though overall.  Could just mean I don't wanna be a dragon.  I'm A REAL BOY dragons are false.  I think.  Also how are there dragons across cultures across time and space.  They don't exist at all.  Yet they were thunk up by peoples independently?  Maybe they did exist!  Now I'm not so sure.  Hmm I've given myself a lot to think about.  Maybe I'd LTURQ if I had more time.  No time to waste on dragons!  Except for talking about them in entry.  But that's not a waste of time.  It helps me pad the entry!
     Cool.  Mets have had 4 straight hits to start the game and lead 2-0.  WOW.  I'm spending valuable time looking back and forth at TV every 15 seconds.  This is time that could be better spent padding out the entry.  Oh well the experience was used to pad out the entry when I talked about it.  So it did help it turns out!  Oh right Dragons.  Google are dragons real and if not EXPLAIN.  Anyway what else is going on.  Nice rest of the day in store!  Listen to some Music on walks.  Watch some Mets game.  Play some Guitarsmith!  The Mets have had five straight hits now!  That's gotta be some sort of record only counting the last week or so!  So that's something to be happy about.  You'd think at some point the Nationals (the team The Metropolitans are facing) will just give up.  Just save the energy of your players for tomorrow!  Give it a rest.
     Cool.  I dunno.  Uh oh I'll finish writing the entry with time but Doing Spell Check may take HALF AN HOUR ITSELF.  I mispell A LOT of words.  Also there's a lot of common words I misspell all the time.  Scenerio.  Off the top of my head.  Should be Scenario!  You'd think I'd absorb this knowledge at some point and apparently you'd be right, Look Here, Right Now, I'm displaying that absorbed knowledge.  Amazing.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Jeez.  I don't know what I will have for lunch in relation to what I will have for dinner!  I think I'm leaning towards the burger for lunch because It's Delicious!  Sure it'd be delicious for dinner too but Let's Treat Myself have that delicious sooner rather than later.  Besides lets face it by dinner Kids Meal Chicken Parm may be delicious too!  I THINK SO.  Yeah.  COULD BE.
    
Last paragraph!  I did it!  Hey the Mets half inning ended.  They scored 4 runs!  That might be enough to win the game right there!  Now they should put all their energy into preparing for tomorrow's game for strategy.  Why was energy on a game you're probably gonna win when you could be preparing for tomorrow's game which who will win is way up in the air!  Also hey what else is going on.  September!  We're solidly into September at this point.  No hey it's barely September let's be honest still kinda August.  August is WAY over.  Let's talk about it!  Or let's move on.  I have nothing else to say about it so that's a decent barometer of whether I should or shouldn't talk about it further.  Also running out of space in the entry/paragraph!  Gotta make the rest of it Really Count.  What else is going on.  The entry is over.  What an act.  Also I feel like it should have taken me 10 minutes to write this act based on how it shook out.  It took me 25 minutes.  So that's something to not be proud of.  Or be proud of.  I forget.  Oh well.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:34 P.M.

 

 

 

Saturday, September 4, 2021

Try To Look At It My Way

    Hello friends.  Here again with a wonderful new entry.  One would imagine.  I consider a C- wonderful.  And there's a decent chance I reach a C-!  So I got that going for me.  Mets are SURGING.  That makes me happy.  I like it when they do good because I root for them generally.  And when they do good this positively impacts my life somehow.  Except for when they're doing good past my bed time.  I'm either missing the game which I'm not happy about or I'm missing going to sleep when I'm tired which I'm not happy about.  Either way Yes they should set a strict curfew for Mets games but we'll have to start working on that later.  I'm busy now!  I can't be drawing up blueprints for curfews!  I got THINGS to do one would imagine.  What's today.  Saturday.  Amazing.
    
Wonderful!  I finished The Fargo.  It was pretty good.  I liked the SEASONS.  If I had to rank the seasons what would the ranking be.  Well I DON'T have to rank the seasons.  So I'm not going to!  Why would I do something I don't have to do.  Doesn't make sense!  There was an episode where 90% of the episode was in black and white.  NOT A FAN.  I was concerned there was something wrong with my TV!  Also I don't know why it had to be in black and white.  I could have Ignored The Color Myself if I felt like it.  Leave that up to the audience!  Don't force it on them!  Anyway.  Maybe there was SOME color but it was way more black and white than normal.  So there's that.  Great.  I got steak and seafood for lunch.  Something new for dinner!  Could be anything!  Great.
    
Anyway.  There's no rush, but I'm gonna have to start thinking about what Dramatic TV Series I will watch next.  There's no rush!  Although there IS a Rosh Hashanah coming up in a few days.  So there's that to think about.  Hey Yom Kippur coming up soon after that.  Gotta level up with God and make peace and get on the same page.  I'll do it LATER.  No rush!  Got coffee made.  Gonna pour it after next paragraph.  That's how things work!  HEY I took a seventh walk yesterday and it was WONDERFUL.  Evening walk!  Started the watch past sundown and it was legit almost dark by the end of it.  DELICIOUS.  Nice atmosphere is the point I'm trying to make.  Evening walk in park.  Somewhat dark.  Park Dark.  Rhymes!  And Walk!  Almost a slant rhyme.  Evening!  Nothin' there.  If I take a seventh walk JUST A THIRD of the rest of the days of diet I'd be A SOLID ONE POUND LESS than without it.  WOW A SOLID SOMETHING?  I'm Sold!
    
Jeez.  What's my new productive thing after losing weight.  Gotta do something halfway productive.  Otherwise what's the point.  Hmm.  Maybe gain weight.  Gotta do something.  I can't do open mics.  Not safe!  I can't get a job.  Not safe!  What CAN I do.  Work CREATIVELY.  Yeah but I'm not GOOD at things.  So there's that.  GET Good at things.  Well sure you make it sound so easy.  No I Don't.  Huh.  HEY Mets double header today and first game is SOON.  It will be started before entry is over.  I dunno how I'm gonna maneuver Sort Of Watching The Game with Entry And Walks And Shower.  It's one of those GOOD problems though.  YEAH.  Is there any sort of derivative of baseball where you use a tennis ball instead of a baseball and a tennis racket instead of a bat.  My guess?  Somewhere people do that.  Maybe in some sort of summer camp setting scenario.  I'd do it!  Whack that ball real good!  Coffee time.
    
I feel like it's POSSIBLE I've said at least one worthwhile thing so far.  Nothing occurs to me as of now but it's possible there was a thing I'm not remembering.  Anyway I got coffee now!  It's ALL worthwhile because when I'm incrementally More Done then I'm incrementally Closer To The Rest Of The Day.  Which is chore free!  This is kind of a chore!  Also gotta imagine there's a chore or two in the rest of the day.  I dunno what else is going on.  I hope someone else knows what else is doing on.  And they can tell me.  Then again what are the odds this person is in contact with me.  This Someone Else could be ANYONE and the people who could potentially contact me is a VERY small amount of people.  YEAH.  WHAT THE HELL The Mets game isn't un till 1:05 PM and I was imagining 12:30 because they said join us at 12:30 last night while hyping this game and now I realize that's the PRE-SHOW.  WOW.
    
Okay.  Sixth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Play some more ROCKSMITH.  Some EASY songs.  I don't need to be playing difficult songs why bother.  Let someone else do it.  Anyway.  I was watching Back To The Future and Marty McFly isn't that great of a guitar player.  He can play chords okay.  (And not even that when he's disappearing!  LOOK disappearing from reality from time to time HAPPENS and you need to be able to POWER THROUGH it).  And his Solos KIND OF make sense but are mostly nonsense.  The point is he's better than me but he's gonna have a tough time making a career out of it unless he continues learning and practicing and taking it more seriously.  So there's that.  Also when he sings it's clearly not him singing.  Gotta wonder if that'll pay off in the long run.
    
Wonderful.  Thinking about getting another Breakfastcentric Meal tonight.  I've been leaning into that HEAVILY lately and ya know what I have no regrets.  Delicious AND reasonable amount of calories.  So GET OFF MY BACK ABOUT IT.  The Mets are playing good baseball!  It's fun to watch.  I can live vicariously through them so in essence I'M playing good baseball.  Wow this is great news.  Maybe that's something I can do when I lose weight and need a new productive thing to do.  Play good baseball vicariously.  I dunno are there winter leagues this year.  Pandemic might limit amount of Bonus Leagues.  Hmm guess I'll need to find a Winter Sport to live vicariously through.  How's the LUGE competition these days.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta wonder if there is or ever was an outside hockey arena.  And they just play on Regular Natural Ice.  Sounds not so safe but also fun!  GOOGLE OUTDOOR HOCKEY ARENA.  HEY they have outdoor games now and again to mix things up!  But not a regular entire season deal.  WONDERFUL.
    
Great.  If I went back in time to play guitar I'd play REALLY SHITTY guitar.  Not just because that's all I'm capable of but because of STRATEGY.  You play good guitar?  When you go back to your original time then everyone will have caught up with AND SURPASSED you.  You're giving everything away!  HOWEVER if you play like shit then you return to your time period everyone is playing like shit because that's all they know and suddenly YOU LOOK LIKE A GUITAR GENIUS by being slightly better.  It's called STRATEGY ever hear of it.  Wonderful.  Also that's why I'm not good at things.  For strategy!  Let's get that out of the way and settled once and for all.  Anyway what else is going on.  Oh right the paragraph is over.
     Jeez.  I can EASILY pair a cookie or something with Steak and Seafood for lunch.  EASY.  I can also EASILY not do that.  EASY.  Hmm deciding whether to have a cookie is EASY it turns out.  I thought it was more difficult than it was because I got in my head about it.  Now that I think about it it's not a big deal one way or another.  Hmm you heard it here first.  The Mets pitcher Carlos Carrasco is nicknamed Cookie.  I don't know how I feel about that!  Wait.  Yes I do!  I don't like it!  Cookie sounds like an Old Lady's nickname.  Not a man baseball player IN THE PRIME OF HIS LIFE.  Then again I also don't care at all and feel Hey Live And Let Live.  I wish I had a nickname.  I'm happy for him all in all and I wish him the best of luck.  Also it's good press for Cookies.  I'm, "Down," with that!  Maybe it's BAD press for cookies if he doesn't perform well.  Oh well that's life!  Is it.  Is that life.  Really?  Sure it is.
     Last paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it!  Oh right gotta figure out what productive I can do in life in 3-4 months.  HMM.  All I could come up with is Make Music but I'm not GOOD at that!  And I presumably will have no INSPURATION.  And also I DON'T HAVE THE PATIENCE.  So there's that.  What else is going on.  I get to take a nice walk soon.  Park Walk!  Which is a slightly better walk all things considered.  Except for One Thing Considered which is that it's 1-2 minutes shorter than Other Walk.  Which makes no difference if I take them the same amount of times day in day out.  But if we're just ISOLATING one walk and looking at it on its own merit as if it was the end all be all walk, I might rather take the other walk because it's more exercise.  HOWEVER it's fun to walk in park on account of TREES and NATURE.  So the point is I forget but I'll be back soon.

 

 

Are You Sure About That

    Hello friends.  Here to write a few more paragraphs.  Then take a fun shower.  Then drink coffee and write more.  Then my day will be good.  Presumably!  What else is going on.  I'm not gonna do anything particularly fun in the shower.  Like masturbate.  Off the top of my head that's the main thing that would turn a regular shower into a fun shower.  But I don't anticipate doing that!  Then again now that I'm thinking about it maybe I should.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses!  Anyway.  I don't like stepping into shower and water feels too hot for 5 seconds.  Maybe I should make it cold and then step in and then make it hot.  Well that's no good then water will be too cold when I step into shower.  Surely there's a heat setting that feels comfortable when I first step in.  I can IMAGINE stepping into water being showered and it being pleasant.  Well I'll keep you updated on THIS too as it progresses.
    
Wonderful.  HEY I got 3-4 months to really put some thought into what I can do productive after weight loss.  Gotta imagine I can come up with SOMETHING.  Maybe there is a job I could get that's safe.  And I would be good at!  And is available to me.  I dunno that's a lot of variables where All Signs Point To No.  Also having a jub isn't fun!  I want to HAVE FUN.  Some jubs are fun.  Yeah you'd think so wouldn't you.  Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe I can become General Manager of The Mets.  I'll NEVER get a DUI because I don't drive at all!  Also I know about being a general manager I'VE SEEN DRAFT DAY.  Also I know about being a general manager I'VE SEEN MONEYBALL.  Also I know about being a general manger I've seen THE MANAGEMENT.  Pretty good odds there was a movie called, "The Management," in I Wanna Say The 1990's.  Better LTURQ.  There was a film from 2008 just called, "Management."  Well what do I care about that.  Nothing!  I'm talking about THE Management.
   
Oh right what else is going on.  LOOK I gotta figure out whatta do with the next 3-4 months before I can think about what happens NEXT.  Keep your eye on the ball.  Play the game you've got today and don't worry about the one tomorrow!  That doesn't sound right it's good to prepare for tomorrow.  I feel like that's a general lesson we teach kids.  Be prepared for tomorrow or something!  Oh well the point is I dunno live your life okay it doesn't matter that much get off my back about it.  What else is going on.  If I Don't have a car how will I get to and from stadium.  Also is General Manager Office somewhere In Stadium?  Gotta hope it would be, right?  That'd be fun!  Anyway I guess I can buy a bus and drive that to and from stadium.  But I can't drive a car OR a bus.  Well easy I hire a personal bus driver.  WHAT'S SO COMPLICATED ABOUT THAT.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Also YES of course this bus is made up to look like a regular city bus to trick people.  That's part of the deal!  That's how I get off!  Anyway what else is going on.  I feel like Clint Eastwood played a scout in a movie and he presumably had to deal with General Manager.  So I saw that movie too.  Anyway I don't care anymore this is a new paragraph all that is old news.  Cool!  Hey today is the weekend.  Part of it at least.  You know what that means!  NOTHING.  Well it may very well mean something to you.  It probably means something to a big majority of adults!  PLUS KIDS.  Also elderly who are normally TOO elderly to even be CONSIDERED adults.  And Of Course Dead People.  What else is going on.  I'd like to be buried in a mausoleum.  Or Not Buried, as the case may be.  Just lay around somewhere above ground where people can see me if they felt like it.  I like the idea of being in the thick of things even while dead!  Above ground!  Still relevant and part of the picture!
     I guess.  Pretty good chance I'll have entry done by start of Metropolitan Games.  This is important for some reason.  Great.  I think I had a dream where I was playing HALO.  I forget the context.  And I forget if I DEFINITELY had the dream.  Solid 75% I had a dream.  Which was MLK's original script for speech.  I THINK... I HAD A DREAM... CAN'T FULLY REMEMBER IT SO I CAN'T SAY FOR SURE...  Oh well such is life.  What else is going on.  I dunno.  Now I'm thinking about whether I'm gonna have a Fun Shower or not.  I mean I might as well at this point, right?  Couldn't hurt.  What else is going on.  I guess get started on The Management once I'm done losing weight.  Whatever that means.  I'll be back soon!

 

 

I'll See You Tomorrow

    LOOK I'm enjoying these Cancer Animal Crackers a lot.  The first time I tasted it I thought it had a slightly weird taste but I got used to it.  REAL USED TO IT, REAL FAST.  Now I can't get enough of them!  Well I can get enough of them.  I have a handful and that's enough.  But he point is Sure What Else.  Did NOT have a Fun Shower today.  Too lazy!  Also I like short showers.  If I was having fun that'd prolong the shower and I didn't feel like standing up that long.  So there's that.  Got coffee going on.  Delicious!  Boxer briefs which were new underwear as of a year or two ago and always fit snugly are now feeling KIND OF LOOSE.  HOLY CRAP it's good I'm losing weight but I FEEL LIKE I'M LOSING A FRIEND.  These boxer briefs were COMFORTABLY tight.  Now all that's gone and my life will never be the same.  For the worse.  Not for the better.  Presumably I can buy the exact same thing but smaller.  You'd think so wouldn't you.
    
What else is going on.  I will EASILY finish this act before Metropolitan Games.  Well, I mean, relatively easy.  Everything is relative!  Just ask Einstein.  He had an entire THEORY which was Everything Is Relative.  Per my understanding.  Also you can ask Einstein all you want but he'll never respond.  He's DEAD.  He's DONE responding to people.  What else is going on.  Probably gonna watch a tiny bit of Met game before walk.  But no more than a tiny bit!  First guess is Just First Half Inning.  That's also my second third AND FOURTH guess.  But then fifth guess is something else.  Sixth through fourteenth guesses are still pending.  GIVE ME SOME TIME to formulate further guesses.  Guessing TAKES TIME.  Wonderful.  What else is going on.  I got three Super Market Made Meals and they are ALL chicken based.  Kids Chicken Parm.  Grilled Chicken and Sweet Potatoe and Broccoli.  Chicken Curry.  WOW CHICKEN I DON'T BELIEVE IT.  It's healthy and you can eat it often without getting bored of it!  And it's RARE I get it from Regular Delivery Place.  So basically I AM HAPPY.  With how these meals are shaking out.  About other stuff?  Well I guess some other stuff is pretty good.  To be happy about!  I'M UPSET A LOT TOO though.
     Wonderful.  I bet Einstein would be a proponent of eating chicken.  Well I guess it depends on the odds.  If I'm betting 100 dollars to win 10 dollars that Einstein is a proponent of eating chicken I don't think that's worth it!  Pretty crappy odds!  Also does he have to have EXPLICITLY proponeneted eating chicken in his life?  Or is it just understood somehow cosmically that it's confirmed AFTER THE FACT he's pro-eating chicken.  Because the first thing AGAIN NOT GREAT ODDS.  If he made a big deal about it In Life we would have heard about it, right?  I dunno that sort of thing.  The point is YES I also got Pastrami Deli Meat which isn't chicken but THAT'S BESIDES THE POINT.  It's adjacent to the point.  Literally RIGHT NEXT to the point.  But it's NOT the point.  Let's talk about it.  I forget about what.  Whatever it was I was just saying.  Besides The Point.  Oh.  Right.  It's all coming back to me.
    
Penultimate paragraph.  Got some GUM from Super Market.  I think I told you a few days ago Oh Right I Gotta Add Gum To The Order.  But I'm not doing it now.  I'll do it later.  I said something like that.  Well guess what I REMEMBERED TO DO IT LATER.  And now the gum is IN MY POSSESSION.  Except the parts I already chewed and discarded.  Now they belong Back To The Earth From Whence They Came.  What else is going on.  Play some more ROCKSMITH today.  Right now I'm tuned down half a step.  So I'd play a handful of those songs first.  Then Tune Up!  Play some more songs!  SURE I'd rather play the Tuned Up Songs first but that'd require me doing an extra tuning today for no good reason.  So you can see the kind of predicament I'm in.  Maybe you can't.  Oh well.  Sorry about that.
    
Last paragraph of the day!  I don't believe it!  I'm pretty sure some of these songs, not only am I playing a small percentage of the notes that are actually played to make it easier, but I feel I'm playing notes that aren't played in the songs at all!  I'm playing notes that are in key with the song playing and follow some logic of the song MUSICALLY.  But I don't think they're part of the song in actuality at all!  Oh no I'm scared.  What else is going on.  Was there something else I was gonna keep you updated on.  Oh, right.  I didn't make much of an effort to set Heat Of Shower Water such that it was Neutral while I was stepping into the shower.  Still a bit too hot.  But wasn't too uncomfortable today all in all.  So the point is the entry is over.  I'll see you tomorrow.

-12:48 P.M.

 

 

 

Friday, September 3, 2021

I'm Not Real Proud Of This

    Hey!  Will I be accepting a Super Market delivery within the next few hours?  Of course I will!  Will that interrupt me writing the entry?  Probably about a 25-30% chance it will.  In the meantime though let's get started.  Have you heard the good news about the world wide world of sports.  The Mets won again yesterday!  They achieved this by scoring more Baseball Runs than their opponent.  I can't remember the last baseball game where a team won while scoring less than their opponents.  Off the top of my head must have happened a handful of times throughout history.  The good news is I AM WEARING A SHIRT.  Hmm.  Didn't see that Good News coming!  There it is, though.  Out of soda this morning.  Drinking cranberry juice mixed with water!  DELICIOUS and nutritious.  The water part anyway.  Can't speak to the cranberry juice.
    
Wonderful.  I will be finishing THE FARGO tonight!  Then it's onto something new.  Possible watching OZ.  Oz isn't a great show but it's
on TV and I'm pot committed to watching a lot of TV every day.  I hope if I ever go to prison they put me in a unit where everyone is friends.  I don't get why in Film and TV and Documentaries people in prison are always enemies.  Why can't se all jus get along!  Be FRIENDLY and people will be FRIENDLY BACK.  Also let's open up a FRIENDLIES STATION at the cafeteria.  I feel like there's a chain restaurant Friendlys.  I might have seen that in a movie.  Anyway.  If prisoners are too much friends with each other hen prison wouldn't be so bad and if prison isn't so bad how could the warden get off by making people in his ward suffer.  He wouldn't be able to, that's who! 
     Anyway.  Started coffee.  That's a good non-water drink.  It's part water.  You pour in a lot of water and then put some coffee grounds into another compartment and it combines them to make coffee.  Hmm what would happen if I poured in cranberry juice instead of water.  I'd have delicious Cranberry Coffee that's what.  One day I'll think about doing that somewhat.  I look forward to that day.  Anyway got 3 part Steak and Stuffed Sole last night.  Gonna have part II tonight!  And have Other Meal I Got Freedom Chip Pancakes for lunch today!  YEAH.  Sounds good to me!   Wonderful.  I'm up to a season or a part of a season in The Twilighted Zone where episodes are an hour long.  I don't like it!  Is what I felt AT FIRST.  Then I got used to it.  Is what I felt SECOND.  Then I stopped liking it again.  That's what I'm UP TO in feeling.
     Yeah.
  Cool!  Gonna get coffee after this paragraph.  I don't believe it!  If I finish this act before Super market delivery comes, maybe play some VIDEO game in the meantime.  Why did I capitalize, "Video."  For Fun!  Oh okay I get it.  Today is Friday.  FINALLY the weekend.  I've been waiting all year for the weekend!  This weekend.  All past weekends were a snooze.  This weekend though is gonna be The Tops.  Anyway 2022 is coming up.  I can't wait!  Think of all that will happen.  COVID continuing.  A SECOND AND MAYBE THIRD THING.  I like the sound of that!  Hey what if something GOOD happens.  I dunno if that's possible.  How could something good happen.  It doesn't even sound right.  I can imagine bad things happening.  I can imagine nothing happening.  Good things happening just Does Not Compute!
     Wonderful.  Coffee time!  Wonderful.  I can VAGUELY ALMOST imagine good things happening but them not being reported on or emphasized.  It's PRACTICALLY possible.  So that's a best case scenario I guess.  Anyway.  Threw out TWO pairs of boxers that are way too big on me and were even probably to big on me when I was 30 pounds heavier.  YEAH that'll show THEM for being useless.  Also if we're talking about one pair of boxers we're talking about ONE BOXER.  There's no Pair there!  No S in BoxerS.  Let's talk about it Language is Dumb and I say we boycott language.  Or figure out another way to call attention to this problem.  I'm open to other ideas!  I haven't checked a Joe Biden Approval Rate TO Remember in 2-4 months.  Gotta imagine he's several points down from when I last checked.  The honeymoon is over!  Which is ab ad thing.  You get married you're happy.  You're on your honeymoon you're VERY happy!  The honeymoon is over that's when the regrets start to kick in.  Sounds about right.
     Wonderful.  What else is going on.  Should have gotten some Mini Black and Whites from Super Market.  But I DIDN'T.  Because I'm some sort of idiot.  Also All Lives Matter people I imagine have a problem with Black And Whites and insist on calling them Whites And Blacks.  Not because they're racist just because WHITE PEOPLE MATTER MORE AND SHOULD COME FIRST.  Don't call them racist though THEY'RE NOT.  Blacks are still part of the cookie!  A LESSER LESS IMPORTANT PART.  Damn All Lives Matter People Will They Ever Learn!   Anyway.  Possible we can get A Black and White and Les Say Yellow Cookie?  Divide it into thirds!  A third white (VANILLA) a third black (CHOCOLATE and a third something else (NEAPOLITAN???).  That sounds like a Million Dollar Idea!  I'd eat a Tri-Color Cookie IN A SECOND.
   
You heard it here first!  How about GREY.  I dunno about that gonna have to think about it.   What is this, the seventh paragraph?  Yeah!  It is!  Great!  If The Mets just gain TWO GAMES on Braves and/or Phillies they go into Final 3 Game Series With Graves WITH PLAYOFF HOPES ALIVE.  TWO GAMES?  THEY CAN DO THAT IN.. A MATTER Of... TWO GAMES... AS LONG AS THE OTHER TEAM ALSO PLAYS... TWO GAMES AT... THE SAME TIME... YEAH.  Wonderful.  Also yes they are now The Atlanta Graves.  And the stadium is built on an old Indian Burial Ground.  WOW that sounds like a great premise for a stadium.  I've heard of ANGELS in the outfield but this is ridiculous!  Also presumably these ghosts are ANTI The Atlanta Graves for disturbing their peace.  So they're gonna always help The VISITING Team.  So that's something to consider?
    What else is going on.  It's called Atlanta because it's only 200 miles away from The Atlantic Ocean.  I LOOKED IT UP ON A MAP AND EVERYTHING.  Wonderful.  Also all this talk on History Channel where is the lost city of Atlantis?  hey Guess what IT'S GOTTA BE IN THE ATLANTIC OCEAN.  The similarity of the words is a HUGE give away.  This one is pretty obvious you can refine your search to around the Atlantic Ocean You IDIOTS how have you not thought of this!  Anyway great just great.  Hey guess what instead of playing video game I can watch TV!  That's like playing a video game but I don't have to bother pressing buttons or Thinking How To Advance In Video Game.  YEAH SOUNDS GOOD TO ME.  Anyway.  Mets are fun to watch this week not just because they're creeping up in playoffs so games mean more but just because they look like a better team!  It's more fun to watch them and be like yeah they could win this game because they're pretty good.  As opposed to watching them and being like well maybe they can win by accident but these guys are not doing great at baseball lately.
    
Wonderful!  What else is going on.  Ninth paragraph!  Lucky Number Nine!  Sure.  If Man is 5 and the Devil is 6 then God is 7 and SUPER GOD IS 8!!!  You heard it here first.  Hmm this super god seems intriguing I'd like to hear more about Super God.  Maybe bypass Regular God completely.  Who needs God when you've got ULTRA GOD.  Nobody that's who.  What else is going on.  Hmm what's going on on the dark web.  What happens if I google Dark Web.  I wanna see what the dark web is all about!  HMM A LOT OF NO GOOD.  People on Dark Web ARE UP TO NO GOOD.  I don't like it and I WON'T STAND FOR IT.  Maybe I can go on Dark Web to BE A HERO and change the system from the inside!  Then again it's too risky!  You start messing on the dark web THEY'LL MURDER YOU.  Then can do anything they want to THERE'S NO RULES THAT CAN HOLD THEM.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I'd like to participate in the Light Web where there's ULTRA Supervision and only the Most FAMILY FRIENDLY content.  Sounds fun also what else is going on.  Looks like I'll finish the act before Super Market delivery.  They still got 5 or 10 minutes it looks like though!  Maybe less than 5 if I write this paragraph as quickly as I want to!    What else is going on.  Met game tonight is tonight.  Fargo Finishing is tonight.  That leaves today wide open!  SOME SHUTTER THE SCREAMING MOVIE SURFACE is in store!!!  Also it's out of store.  In my room!  I don't need to go to a store at all!  Oh well that's life.  I'd go to a blockbuster.  They'd need to figure out Why People Would Need To Go There Anymore but if they do figure that out I'm There!  The point is the act is over.  I'll be back in a little bit!

 

 

 

Oh Well That's Life

    Hey!  Accepted super market delivery and took a walk and here I am!  Wonderful.  Got orange soda going on.  I can have ALL THE SODA I WANT for 5 days.  Then on the sixth day I can still have all the soda I want but I'm CONSCIOUS of the dwindling supply and it weighs heavily on me.  On the seventh day CAN'T HAVE ALL THE SODA I WANT NOT NEARLY ENOUGH.  So that's how my weeks go is the point.  Got some MINI animal crackers.  Animal crackers are already small.  These are half the size of normal animal crackers.  In the shape of BUNNY.  Not a 3d Bunny as Bunnies are In Real Life.  A 2 dimensional bunny!  DELICIOUS.  A mix of separately flavored Honey Chocolate and Chocolate Chip.  Mixed at random.  DELICIOUS.  Anyway wearing a nice SHIRT today.  Not really.  One of my least favorite shirts in the rotation.  But let's face it these days any shirt is a nice shirt.  Gotta be thankful for the good things in life.  Shirts.
     Sure.  I wear T SHIRTS because I'm a cool kid.  Wonderful.  Didn't play any video games between Act I and super market delivery.  Was only 20 minutes.  And I spent that watching THE TELEVISION SET.  Wow Television Set?  That's one way to live your life.  Probably not the best way.  I could think of worse ways, though!  Easily in the 30th percentile of Good Ways To Live Your Life.  Just THINK of all that CONTENT you're consuming.  Amazing!  Anyway the next natural disaster in New York can we get a Nice Tornado.  I feel like I haven't experienced any tornado at all let alone a nice one.  It's important to try new things in life.  Like new TV shows.  Content that's similar to the last TV show you watched but somehow different in some way to keep your attention.  Also Oh Right Tornado.  I don't want any damage to anything ESPECIALLY HUMAN LIFE but I wanna SEE IT and maybe PARTICIPATE IT as long as I'm not ultimately hurt or killed in anyway.
     So there's that.  Much Ado About Rip Torn.  Sure.  What does it say on Rip Torn's tombstone.  RIP Torn.  Does it say RIP on tombstones?  I feel like it does.  Kinda unnecessary though.  Look we know the dead bodies should rest in peace.  This is the same thing it says on the graves on either side of this guy.  Don't bother with the engraving WE GET THE IDEA.  What else is going on.  How deep are graves.  I know the phrase Six Feet Under.  Is it REALLY Six Feet.  Or is that some sort of lie.  Anyway.  I'd like to be buried EXTRA deep just for fun.  I don't know why that's fun.  In fact maybe being buried very shallow is more fun.  I've given myself a lot to think about.   Also is it legal to start my own cemetery.  I dunno what brought about that idea.  Well I was thinking about how I have no burial spot as of now so if I die I dunno what's gonna happen.  And then I thought well hey I'm a DIY kind of guy maybe just start my own cemetery for MYSELF.  Even if its a one person cemetery.  I feel like I could do that if I sign enough papers and grease enough squeaky wheels or something.  And then if I'm doing that MIGHT AS WELL try to get some friends to sign up!
     Penultimate paragraph of Act II!  Wonderful.  Sure I could always just leave instructions for those who outlive me to bury me in some random place either in my house or maybe on public grounds in a park somewhere.  But that's OUTSIDE THE LAW.  It COULD be done but I'd be facing a lot of legal trouble IN HELL.  Obviously they can't penalize me on Earth because I'm dead but gotta imagine it'll catch up with me SOMEWHERE.  What else is going on.  Shower coming up!  I don't believe it.  HEY I could buy some sort of video game for Xbox 360.  A HALO perhaps.  WOW sure I got tired of the one video game that I even made any progress pretty relatively quickly in but A NEW ONE I'd probably get a lot out of for A LONG period of time.  Especially if it's HALO.  That's a COMMERCIALLY and CRITICALLY successful video game franchise.  Wow I'm Sold!
    Last paragraph.  Also I get to have coffee soon with Act III!  This just keeps getting better and better!  Every now and then, not OFTEN, but I'm watching TV and I still get the sensation HEY THIS IS A LOT BETTER THAN BEFORE RE: WATCHING THINGS.  All else being equal, if I'm watching THE SAME THING anyway, this is BIGGER and BETTER because of TV.  Look if you're gonna spend your life watching TV maybe it's better to watch it smaller and worse so that you don't get TOO invested or MAYBE it's better to watch it big and better so that you REALLY get into it.  I've given myself a lot to think about!  No I haven't.  I already stopped thinking about it even before I typed it.  While I was a few words ahead of typing In My Mind I already lost interest and/or enthusiasm for what I was saying.  So there's that.  I'll be back soon!

 

 

 

Hey Here's Some Good News

    Hey!  My Mom was doing laundry so I took a walk instead of taking shower.  We can't use hot water with two devices at once!  Not in today's modern age.  Maybe in tomorrow's modern age.  CERTAINLY not in yesterday's modern age!  Anyway got coffee and orange soda.  Just try and stop me from having a good time!  Actually, don't.  You'd have decent odds of succeeding!  And then my Good Time is ruined and for what.  What else.  Gonna take a shower maybe in an hour or two.  That's how things work today.  Maybe take a bath to mix things up.  I DUNNO taking a bath I have to look at my belly.  And GENERALLY I'm happy with how belly looks these days but from that angle there's no telling how I'd feel!  Why risk it is the point.  Taking a bath is too risky!  So I got that going for me.
     What else.  Lunch will be in Oh I Don't Know three and a half hours.  Delicious!  Hours!  Look is my mom a jerk for doing the laundry when I want to take a shower?  Yes!  Big Jerk!  But I've forgiven.  Sure she can do laundry whenever I want but I can only shower AT THAT TIME but I've forgiven!  Sure I can shower at other times no problem but I'VE FORGIVEN.  September huh.  Third of September!  We're in the thick of things I guess.  Oh no it's FRIDAY THE THIRD...teenth?  Except for the last syllable.  Wow that's even MORE unlucky somehow.  Days can't be unlucky.  For some people to have an unlucky day LOGICALLY WE CAN CONCLUDE others are having a VERY lucky day.  Luck is a zero sum game re: People Enjoying It Or Not On Days.  I feel like that's not too controversial a statement.  Doesn't make sense.  How can something that doesn't make sense be controversial?  You can't get upset about something if you don't know what it is.
    
Makes sense.  What else is going on.  Hey I don't have cinnamon toast crunch but I have graham crackers that are heavy on the cinnamon!  And the Steak & Seafood portion for tonight is pretty light on the abundance of ingredients on account of being split into Thrice.  So yes I can have a graham cracker then!  An entire one!  Certainly at least half of one.  I feel like this is great and it will make my day worthwhile in the end.  So there's that.  What else is going on.  My Dad was concerned that these mini animal crackers will cause cancer because he saw something on the internet about that.  I looked it up myself.  Didn't see anything!  Then I found out YES there is another product made by this brand that causes cancer.  Their Mac & Cheese!  But I should be okay because what are the odds that more than one product a brand makes will cause cancer.  Definitely gonna be either ZERO or ONE.  Two or more cancer causing products just doesn't make sense!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Look if you consume enough products in your life at some point something is gonna cause you cancer.  You can't let that bother you or you'd be looking over your shoulder every time you use a product!  Just accept you'll get cancer from something you shouldn't get it from at some point and live your life!  Cancer isn't that bad.  Everyone gets cancer.  I'm more worried about stuff that would be more surprising to get.  That I would have a legitimate grievance with!  Why should I die of this no one else does NOT FAIR I'M GONNA WRITE A LETTER.  Cancer all you can do is shrug your shoulders.  You certainly can't Stand Up To It!  That would make no sense.  There was a TV FUNDRAISER against cancer called that.  Not sure what they do with that money.  Give it to researchers and whatnot.  Well what do the researchers do with the money.  That's their business.  I guess.
     Last paragraph.  Also if we stand up to cancer enough that cancer is cured, then we'll just die eventually of Something Else!  So in the end kinda pointless?  I dunno what else is going on.  My Mom had cancer.  It was serious!  I'm making fun but sure I'm solidly against cancer and I hope they stand up to it enough that it works and cancer backs down.  I feel like that isn't too controversial a statement.  What else is going on.  Put on a Shutter Movie I think when this is over in a minute.  Which one?  I dunno!  I'll find out soon, though!  You won't!  I could tell you tomorrow but it's only 50/50 I remember.  Maybe 60/40 in favor of You Finding Out Somehow.  So there's that to look forward to!  Great.  I'll see you guys tomorrow.

-1:21 P.M.  

 

 

 

Thursday, September 2, 2021

Ain't That Something

    Hey.  They're criminalizing abortion!  I don't get it!  What do people have against abortion so much.  YEAH I get they think life begins at conception.  But c'mon just DON'T think that you idiots.  Also even if you do think it why not just shrug your shoulders and be like oh well what can ya do.  WHY MUST YOU RUIN ABORTIONS FOR THE REST OF US.  Also on the one hand abortions will almost definitely continue being legal where I live.  But on the other hand LOTS of people live in places where I don't live where abortion is or will be criminalized!  Which doesn't seem right!  Sure they could move to where I live but WE DON'T HAVE ENOUGH ROOM FOR EVERYONE.  Hmm what if we pull a scam where we vote for people who will un-de-un-criminalize abortion.  Wait a second they're scammin' us at voting too!  We can't do that either!  Hmm this seems bad now that I think about it. 
    
Anyway.  Checked weight today.  Was ready to settle for 1.5 pounds less.  I checked many several times and I was 1-2 pounds less.  Let's go with 1.5 and split the difference.  So it's not ALL bad.  On the other hand now if you live in Texas and you want an abortion ROAD TRIP!!!  This is gonna be fun.  Presumably you can get a few of your friends who also would like abortions and make a real fun time out of it.  Some people CAN'T AFFORD to road trip.  I know it's a problem you've got no argument from me!  Gotta imagine that could be a movie 3 years from now.  Abortion Road Trip.  It's FUNNY and it MAKES YOU THINK.  Hmm better get started on the script NOW.  These things take time and if I don't start now I might fall too far behind.  Also I don't know enough about abortions to write this script.  Or road trips!  Or let's face it Scripts.
     What else is going on.  Making more progress into The Fargo.  I look forward to being done with it.  Another TV Show Accomplished!  Put it in the books!  Is there way to guarantee legal abortion in all 50 states by Federal Law or something.  My guess?  Yeah probably they could figure it out.  And trust me I KNOW government.  Almost as much as abortion road trips!  Anyway.  I get why Republican POLITICIANS are against abortion.  To rile up the base!  I just don't fully understand why the base are such jerks.  GET OVER IT!  YEAH.  Anyway hey coffee is coming up soon.  After next paragraph let's say.  Also let's put it into practice.  It's one thing to SAY it.  Meaningless!  Let's DO it is what I wanna do.  I want Freedom Toast for lunch but I can't!  Probably gonna get Communal Diner Meal for DINNER.  I can't get diner for lunch and then other diner for dinner!  WHAT WOULD PEOPLE SAY.
     Sure.  Unless I set it up that I can trick family into getting something else for dinner while I get diner for lunch.  Hmm it's gonna take all my Convincing Conniving Powers to pull that one off.  Anyway.  Looks like hurricane is over here in New York.  It was raining a lot last night!  Night is the time period between the days.  Dark outside for the most part.  Lots of people sleep during this time period as opposed to being awake during the other time period.  Now you know.  Hey the Mets have a baseball game today!  I wish them luck.  Hey The Mets general manager was arrested for a DUI.  Or a DWI.  I'm not sure if there' s a difference.  Is a Driving Under Influence more or less severe than a driving while intoxicated!  You're drunk to a certain level it's under the influence and then over a certain level you're intoxicated?  Anyway the point is WHO CARES IT'S A VICTIMLESS CRIME.  Sure there COULD have EASILY been a victim but obviously there wasn't otherwise he'd be arrested for vehicular manslaughter and not a DUI.  So why penalize him for it!
     Sure.  Coffee after this paragraph.  I never drive cars so I can't get a DUI.  I never have baby making abilities in me so I can't get abortion.  HOWEVER I feel strongly about each cases!  DUI = BAD.  Abortion = GOOD.  Anyway what else is going on.  I think getting a DUI gives the GM CHARACTER.  He's a bit of a wild man!  A rebel!  No one's gonna tell him how to drive!  Look out for this guy he doesn't follow all of YOUR RULES.  What else is going on.  Why would you want to drive while intoxicated.  Don't you take your own safety into account.  What are you dumb or something.  What an idiot!  Moron.  Sure great.  He must have been speeding or something, right?  How did they pull him over unless he was doing something wrong.  He didn't just drive by normally and they had eagle eyes and were like UH OH THAT GUY LOOKED DRUNK LET'S GET THE SIREN GOING AND PULL HIM OVER.  I LIKE THE SIREN PART IT MAKES ME FEEL LIKE A BIG MAN.
    
Coffee time!  Guess I'll get diner for dinner.  Lunch can either be frozen pizza or frozen meatloaf.  I don't have a problem with that!  And if I did I'd keep it to myself and just bite the bullet and have it for lunch anyway because that's part of being an adult.  Anyway.  I can see myself enjoying either of those lunches.  I ca npicture it in my mind's fourth or fifth eye.  Wait a second if it's my MIND'S eye that might be the first or second eye.  The regular first two eyes aren't mind's eyes!  Are they?  I dunno!  Who cares is the point I'm trying to make.  Also will there be a TANGIBLE NOTICEABLE effect re: casual sex because of abortion restrictions?  Gotta imagine there'd be SOME less casual sex if abortion is restricted/outlawed!  And one day I hope to have casual sex so THIS MIGHT EFFECT ME.
    Ugh.  Seventh paragraph.  I'm under the impression you don't know you're pregnant by the time they say you can get an abortion.  OR you JUST BARELY know a week or two before its restricted.  My idea to work around it is to get Abortion Procedures done every month rain or shine.  That way if you're not pregnant no harm no foul.  And if you are you're sure to nip it in the bud because you're ahead of the game by doing it every month!  WOW that makes a lot of sense!  You heard it here first.  How common are abortions anyway.  What's the percent of women who have had an abortion at least once in their life.  Better LTURQ.  A little less than 25% of women have an abortion by age 45.  WOW.  That's... a lot of people!  This law is going to effect... a lot of people!  Well that's not good.
    
What else is going on.  I dunno why they determine it by Age 45.  Just say Ever.  Why is it another category of women who have it at age 45+.  That's MY problem with this.  Anyway I feel like 30 years from now we're gonna have Kavanaugh Babies growing up.  A whole generation of unwanted children and it's on HIM.  AND other people.  But we can focus it ON HIM if we need to focus it on one person I guess.  You heard it here first is the point.  I don't want an unwanted baby.  Who does?  Literally NO ONE wants an unwanted baby.  Not A SINGLE person.  You heard that here first too is the point.  Moving on.  No more Roe Vs Wade?  But that's part of HISTORY.  You learn that in SCHOOL.  You can't change HISTORY.  I guess you COULD but you SHOULDN'T.  Unless it's BAD history.  The point is I FORGET.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wait a second isn't that a premise of the supreme court.  That you can't change precedent.  Oh well I guess now you can.  NOW there's PRECEDENT for CHANGING PRECEDENT.  I don't like the sound of that!  I don't like the concept of it either.  But mainly I don't like the way the words sound out loud.  Just seems wrong to me!  Anyway.  I dunno.  Been thinking about having a nice Alcohol Celebration around my birthday/reaching weight loss goal.  Which may correspond pretty closely!  Just get a couple of beers.  Or even BETTER some LIOQUOR.  You know have a nice Personal Party.  Maybe get some Pizza.  Personal Pizza Party WITH ALCOHOL?  Wow now I have something to look forward to.  In fact forget the alcohol I just wanna have a Personal Pizza Party when I'm done losing weight.  I can get UNHEALTHY PIZZA because ANYTHING GOES now!
     Wonderful.  Get a personal pie from Pizza Hut.  I like it because it makes me feel special.  It's AN ENTIRE PIE that I get to eat myself.  Delicious AND it makes me feel special.  I forget what I was talking about.  Good.  Probably something No Good.  Anyway.  HEY I can have pizza for lunch.  WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THIS SOONER THAT'S DELICIOUS.  Wonderful.  If life begins at conception how do we know for sure when life ends?  I don't think we should be burying dead people.  They might be alive somehow!  Better just prop them up at your kitchen table for the next few centuries JUST TO PLAY IT SAFE.  Alt way of phrasing that joke:  One day we might be able to BRING THEM BACK somehow.  You embalm them and bury them?  Now they have NO chance.  You're GIVING UP ON THEIR LIFE.  See phrasing it this way makes it make 5% more sense.  Because it's true.  ONE DAY THEY CAN LIVE AGAIN but YOU'RE RUINING IT.  I feel I should get some sort of award for this GREAT POINT I JUST MADE.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

Keep It On The Down Low

    Hurricane hit New York pretty hard!  People died and whatnot.  And I was mildly inconvenienced!  Instead of taking my last 30 minute walk I was forced to WALK IN A CIRCLE IN MY ROOM which I did for an hour so in the end it was probably more exercise but STILL POOR ME.  The point is the hurricane is over and presumably all hurricanes are over.  No more hurricanes!  Not after we saw the negative impact of this one.  Why would we start up another one?  It would make no sense!  Anyway I got coffee #2 going.  Felt like drinking it now instead of saving it for act III!  Get off my case about it!  Anyway.  Gonna lose another 17-20 pounds.  Then I'm Golden!  Hmm I'd eat some Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  They're golden in color.  That's why I thought of it.  Makes sense to me.
    
What else is going on.  Hmm maybe I SHOULD get Cinnamon Toast Crunch from Super Market.  It was never my thing.  I probably got it 2 or 3 times as a child.  And never as an adult.  But it's HIGH TIME I TRY IT AGAIN.  DELICIOUS.  I like the cinnamon!  I like the crunch!  The Toast part seems like a lie.  I know toast and this is clearly cereal and not toast.  But 2 out of 3 ain't bad!  Ask Meatloaf!  Which right now is the 2nd option for lunch but it definitely looks like pizza has got a clear lead.  What else is going on.  Presumably by the time I've lost all the weight I wanna lose I will be really attractive and then things will start looking up in my life.  That's the assumption I've been operating under.  NOT REALLY.  Maybe it's a subliminal assumption but on the surface I have no clear hope that things will get any better in my life!  Oh well as long as things don't get WORSE.  Which they might.  Oh No.  OH NO.
    
Cool!  OH RIGHT I just remembered life will get better because I can eat more.  Well that settles that.  Maybe even start DRINKING again.  You know to reward myself.  That sort of thing!  I could ingest more SUGAR and SALT.  USUALLY SEPARATELY BUT OCCASIONALLY TOGETHER.  My body will feel momentarily GREAT about that when it happens.  So basically I've got a lot to look forward to.  Gotta imagine most junk food has a high amount of Sugar AND Salt.  We don't have to imagine it because I'm imagining it for us.  But the point is I forget.  If 23% of women get an abortion by the time they're 45, that's what, over 10% of people around who have had abortions?  At least?  Or at most?  The point is I forget the point I was trying to make now all I could think about is making a good Math Estimation without putting TOO much thought into actually doing the math.  If it's 25% of women that's 1 out of 8 People.  But some people are children.  So you can see the kind of math I'm working with.  The point is gotta imagine people who want and have had abortions will vote accordingly.
    
Oh right voting doesn't count anymore.  DAMNIT they're always one step ahead!  Penultimate paragraph of Act II!  Anyway are we still at any official wars anymore.  Iraq war is officially over right?  Better LTURQ.  They say it was over in 2011.  It's about time!  I guess.  What else is going on.  Then again I'm pretty sure there's places where it's like we still have TROOPS there and we still KILL PEOPLE there but we're not AT WAR.  I could be wrong.  That's the impression I'm under, though!  WOW an IMPRESSION I'm under?  I'M SOLD!  Cool.  Gonna take a shower after this Act.  Gonna be great!  Presumably.  OH NO We have TROOPS in America.  IT'S A CIVIL WAR GET OUT OF THE WAY.  What else is going on.  I finished the coffee.  I WISH THERE WAS MORE.  There is more.  But I won't have it.  TWO CUPS A DAY IS ENOUGH.  YEAH.
    
Wonderful.  Hmm I'd eat some Cinnamon Toast Crunch.  Anyone got any Cinnamon Toast Crunch?  I'd have a handful of them for sure.  Re-upping with Super Market tomorrow.  May be running low on my Soda Supply tonight but I got enough that it's not much of a problem.  I can have WATER as a beverage 2 or 4 times why not I like trying new things.  Cool.  Pizza is PEPPERONI pizza.  We're talking each slice equivalent has a solid TWO pieces of pepperoni.  WOW I'M SOLD.  No I'm not.  The PIZZA was SOLD.  To ME.  That's how I acquired it in the first place!  The point is I forget.  Still got three Mini Wings.  That I don't particularly like!  I could have ONE but ONLY ONE with the meal if I choose to.  Anymore would be too much.  Even ONE is too much.  In fact I BETTER NOT HAVE ANYTHING AT ALL FOR LUNCH JUST TO PLAY IT SAFE.  Hey I'm gonna take a shower now.  Great, just great.  I'll be back soon.

 

 

 

I'll Catch Up With You Later

    Hmm if 23% of women get abortions that means a similar amount of men are having abortions by proxy.  Wow BREAKING NEWS this effects a lot of people extremely negatively.  You heard it here first!  Anyway what else is going on.  Took a shower.  Now I'm back and better than ever!  Well better than sometimes.  Probably better than 1 out of 8 Times.  Anyway.  Maybe for my birthday I can get an Iced Coffee.  YEAH.  I can get an iced coffee tonight.  From diner!  Don't gotta go in anywhere to get it.  But I don't want an iced coffee tonight.  Maybe during tomorrow Day.  Maybe I can do that if I feel like it.  Mets GM pleading NOT GUILTY to DUI.  OR DWI.  Whichever they are accusing him of.  Anyway I feel like you should be able to play MAYBE GUILTY???.  You can plead guilty of course.  Not guilty of course.  Say you don't wanna give away too much information and play this one close to the vest.  You wanna plead MAYBE GUILTY??? :-? which is a smiley face.  the ? looks like the mouth AND REPRESENTS the question-mark nature of the face.
    
Cool.  Probably gonna have to watch some TV before next walk.  My Dad hasn't started his walk yet and I need him to come back from his walk before I can take mine.  It's IMPORTANT.  I'M DOWN TO SIXTH PLACE IN FANTASY BASEBALL.  Out of TWELVE.  And gotta imagine half of the league hasn't paid attention since Draft Took Place to start the league.  So basically I'M UNDERPERFORMING and I feel terrible about it.  I was in THIRD PLACE a few weeks ago.  DAMNIT.  DAMN DAMN DAMN.  Is this what my life has come to?  Yes.  Yes it is.  Apparently.  Oh well.  Watch some sort of HORROR movie I guess.  An OLD movie but not TOO old.  We're talking IDEALLY mid 1980's.  Early or late 1980's is good.  70's?  A little too early!  2000's?  WAY TOO LATE.  I lost track of what I was talking about. 
     Anyway.  My Mom CLAIMS she has never had an abortion.  So there's that!  She CLAIMS she's known people who have had abortions and/or wanted abortions but couldn't get them.  So there's that!  Abortion IS A THING THAT EXISTS according to her and others.  So there's that!  What else is going on.  At this rate I will be done with All Fargos by tomorrow.  Presumably there will be more Fargo In The Future but that's just a guess prediction.  We don't know for sure!  It could EASILY turn out to be incorrect.  But even EASIER it can be correct.  Also PRETTY EASY that it's Maybe Guilty??? :-()?.  Also now in the smiley face it has big lips and A Sideways QuestionMark Goatee.  YEAH.  Anyway.  Anyway what good news is there.  Gotta be some good news out there.  HMM.  I can watch TV today.  Eat some meals.  So my life is okay!  That's halfway there.  My life being okay but other people going through crap well that's 50% good there for me and whatnot.  Half is glass full!
     Penultimate paragraph!  I don't believe it.  HEY WAIT A SECOND MY LIFE IS HALF BAD TOO.  Now we're talkin 25% there!  WHAT THE HELL I DON'T HAVE TO PUT UP WITH THIS.  Wait a second maybe I do.  I DON'T LIKE THE SOUND OF THAT.  Hey what's the latest news on whether we get another booster shot after 6 months.  I feel like I want that even if I don't need it.  I just like the idea that I'm getting it when someone else needs it more won't get it instead.  It makes me feel like a big man.  Anyway what else is going on.  NOBODY NEEDS IT MORE THAN ME.  I'M THE MOST IMPORTANT TO MYSELF PERSON IN THE WORLD.  I dunno about that.  My immediate family is pretty close!  I'm The MOST important person to me but my immediate family are a close 2nd 3rd and 4th!  Then other people are PRETTY important too.  No questioning that!  But if we HAD to rank people then yes I come out on top for better or worse.  Better for me.  Worse for other people!
    
Last paragraph.  I guess.  If I had to choose Who Gets Shot though for example I would NOT be in first place.  Dad would be in first place because he has extenuating circumstances.  But he already got his third shot!  Then my Mom is in first place because she's elderly and important to me.  Then AFTER HER we're skipping over my brother and me because we're young and healthy and we go to Some Generic Old And/or Extenuating Circumstances Person Who Hasn't Had Any Shot.  It's all relative is the point.  And people who aren't me but are high up in importance to me are All Relatives more often than not.  Anyway great I'm a jerk.  I'm not proud of it!  I'm not ashamed of it!  I feel like there are a lot bigger jerks than me!  But I could stand to be less of a jerk.  Great I'll take care of that tomorrow.  I'll be a better person TOMORROW I got things to do today!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:37 P.M.
    

 

 

 

Wednesday, September 1, 2021

I Don't Have To Explain Myself To You

    I probably should anyway though.  Just so you don't get confused.  I'm a guy.  I do stuff for some reason no one is really sure of.  Also That's About It.  Anyway I'm a bit concerned about this California Recall Election!  I don't live there but some people do and they deserve a Democratic Governor!  Also it effects NATIONAL politics because Old Lady Democratic Senator from California can die and then be replaced by governor.  Don't be a fool, vote AGAINST recall!  That sort of thing.  Gotta imagine I have some imaginary readers in California.  I always imagine I have imaginary readers but it doesn't get any more specific than that.  I give NO qualities or attributes to imaginary reader.  Everyone's equal in my book!  Except for the fact they read this.  In which case I pity them but what can ya do that's life.
     Cool!  Hurricane may be hitting today!  I dunno how serious its gonna be.  No one does!  That's how weather works!  We need a Minority Report situation but for weather.  Get some Precogs floating in a bathtub and they predict when the clouds EVEN THINK about making it rain.  That sort of thing.  Also I know people with money like to, "Make It Rain," but even THEY can't compete with clouds re: making it rain.  Wonderful.  Woke up a little bit late today.  Not too late but later than the standard lately.  YEAH.  Got coffee a-brewing!  Got a Meal Up In The Air today.  Kids chicken parm for one.  Most likely other one is Frozen Super Market pizza.  But I can get ANYTHING from The Doordash Enterprise To Remember.  WOW ANYTHING?  That's Almost EVERYTHING I COULD IMAGINE.  In fact it is.  Anything IS everything!  Wonderful.
    
Hey it's a new month.  Time to flip the page on Patriotism Calendar.  It's a picture of a father and son outside of a tent and the kid is looking through a telescope. OH I GET IT.  Patriotism Camp Telescope activity.  Duh!  Anyway wonderful.  Mets are creeping back into contention!  That may either CONTINUE over the next few days or GO BACKWARDS.  Or STAY WHERE IT IS.  I've narrowed it down to those three possibilities because I'm some sort of genius.  Anyway I got teriyaki wings yesterday!  Pretty shitty!  The wings were half the size as normal wings which, fine, whatever, I can just eat more so it's the same.  But it didn't taste great!  Oh well now I know.  For next time!  OH NO I may forget over the course of a couple of years.  Then I get it all over again.  HAVE I LEARNED NOTHING.  APPARENTLY.  I HAVE APPARENTLY LEARNED NOTHING.  In the future.  We need a Precog to make a signal next time I think about getting Teriyaki Wings From Deli.
     We need precogs for Everything.  What we're supposed to live in aw orld where Things Happen Before They Can Be Stopped?  That doesn't sound right!  Checking my weight tomorrow.  It's been a solid Almost A Week And A Half.  And that's how often I check my weight for some reason.  I know the reason but it's  too complicated to explain.  Why bother.  Let's just keep it to ourselves and let the rest of us move on with our life.  Huh.  OH NO Javy Baez lost a piece of Earring Jewelry when celebrating after Successful Win yesterday afternoon.  Did he ever find it?  They said it was DIAMOND.  Diamond is the most expensive thing there is!  Also gotta imagine it has sentimental value!  Also why you playin' baseball with diamond earrings on.  What if you get hit in the earring by a baseball.  Now not only is your ear getting hit by a baseball but it can get CUT by the diamond.  The point is I forget.  Oh.  I feel very invested in whether he got his earring back.
     Gonna get coffee after this paragraph!  Wonderful.  SOMEONE got that earring.  At some point someone will come across it.  Possession is 9/10ths of the law!  Gonna have to look into that one.  I know that's a colloquial saying but is it accurate?  I dunno!  Can't be UNIVERSALLY accurate.  The law is different from place to place!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also I'm not 100% on board with Finders Keepers.  I think the Losers Losters have a pretty good claim to this thing too.  After all they JUST lost it.  Five second rule!  If they lost it but then find it 5 seconds later it's still theirs!  That's my impression.  Let's make it five HOURS.  YEAH!  I dunno what this means.  Hey great just great.  Play some more Rocksmith today.  Watch some more Forego.  Maybe a SHUTTER THE SCREAMING SERVICE movie or two!  It's gonna be fun.
    Except for how walking may be in heavy rain and/or skipped and/or replaced by Circle Walking In Room.  I'm not very happy with any of those options.  DUMB HURRICANE.  MAKIN' MY DAY LESS CONVENIENT.  Oh hey I was gonna get coffee now.  Let's do that. Hey I did that.  Finders Keepers!  Also I think Finders Keepers is a good general rule because They Already Have It.  It's easier to hold on to something than to get something from someone else.  Not only LEGALLY is it more theirs but PRACTICALLY you're gonna have a tough time getting it away from them.  So many Doordash choices.  Chipotle!  Chinese Food.  PIZZA TYPE FOOD.  Diner food and all that that entails.  WOW.  Then again if I get something from Doordash, gotta eat it again tomorrow.  Then again DELICIOUS who cares.  Then again am I back to the first thing or is this a third of fourth Then Again.
    
Wonderful.  As far as I can tell it looks like at the very least my next walk will be rainless.  Great!  Wonderful.  Amazing.  Cool!  I lost track of what I was talking about.  Think I'm gonna have Kids Chicken Parm for dinner and have some wonderful something else for lunch.  That's how I feel RIGHT NOW.  Not how I feel LATER.  I may feel SIMILARLY later but odds are against EXACTLY the same.  Finders Laters.  Seventh paragraph.  We're getting close to Calling It Quits for act I HOWEVER I have hit a wall and I can't think of anything to say.  So I'm in no-man's-land!  Which I believe is a World War I Trenches Reference.  It's between the trenches.  You start running out halfway between trenches you're gonna get shot!  NO MAN will survive in THAT LAND.  Anyway maybe just stick to your trenches.  Look you can live here in the trenches you've already won call a truce.  Let the no-man's-land become a nature preserve or something, everybody wins!
    
Cool.  If I could figure out how to pitch I MIGHT have some fun playing Baseball Video Game here and there.  But I can't and I never will be able to!  You'd think it'd be intuitive enough that even the dumbest person could figure it out.  But APPARENTLY NOT.  Because I'M THE DUMBEST PERSON and I can't figure it out.  Also there's no instruction booklet!  This was a USED game.  And when the original owner sold it to gamestop they apparently kept the booklet for themselves.  Those BASTARDS.  ALWAYS ONE STEP AHEAD.  Maybe I can look it up online.  That's not a bad idea!  Probably some explanation somewhere.  Some dumb website that specializes in Controls For Video Games.  Hey where do I get off calling them Dumb.  As of now THEY'RE THE MOST USEFUL WEBSITE IN THE WORLD FOR ME.  Yeah!  Also this 2012 video game is so old that most of the players are players I remember from when I was a kid as opposed to players that are classic players for Current Time Generation.
    LANCE BERKMAN?  WHO ARE YOU KIDDING HE'S FROM 1997.  Lance Berkman's rookie year was 1999.  I dunno about that pretty sure he was already an all star in 1997.  Anyway what else is going on.  Ninth paragraph!  I know how to HIT in the baseball game.  I'm not great at it but I can easily make contact at least once every now and then.  What else is going on.  I can field A BIT.  If I let the computer do the fielding for me.  You don't press any button on the controller, they're gonna field it themselves.  I start pressing buttons, then I take control, and I have to field it myself!  Well this is easy Just Don't Do Anything.  Let the video game take care of everything itself.  It's called FUN.  What else is going on.  I may have to press buttons to Throw Ball.  But if I press nothing the vide ogame will GET to the ball themselves I feel.  YEAH.  Also not 100% how to throw the ball.  So there's that.
    
What else is going on.  I think the color commentators in the game have too many things loaded up.  I don't like how much they have so much to say each at bat.  I feel Less Is More.  Wonderful.  I feel like either By Now or in Close Future they can have Voice Algorithms so that when playing baseball video game there's UNLIMITED amount of things they can say that are super relevant.  WOW CLOSE FUTURE?  This could be in the cards for 2025 EASILY.  I dunno I don't like the idea of Super Intelligent Video Game Baseball Commentator Algorithm.  Might be Too Powerful and Try To Take Over The World.  Oh well I guess we'll have to wait and see.  Wonderful.  I'm gonna take a walk now!  I'll be back soon.  Hey this act went quickly.  Now I'm not behind schedule at all.  You heard it here first!  Presumably Only Here Last.  No where else will you hear this again!  Wonderful.

 

 

 

Let's Enjoy Some More

    Hey!  Time to write Act II.  My mom is doing Laundry so instead of taking shower between Acts II and III I will take walk.  Which is great because it shouldn't be raining yet so it helps me work in Walkings Around Rainings.  Anyway what else is going on in the wide world of sports.  I'm not 100% sure what Newsom did to be recalled.  The last I heard his main scandal was either saying you shouldn't or making you unable to eat at restaurants without masks and then he did that.  In which case yeah that's pretty bad looking but it's not I HATE HIM SO MUCH I'D RATHER HAVE A RIGHT WING GOVERNOR OUT OF SPITE bad.  Then again there could have been other stuff since then!  Or other stuff before then!  Even still Spite isn't a great driving force re: participating in politics.  It's an OKAY driving force.  Not GREAT though.
    
Wonderful.  Think I might have BAGEL for lunch.  House Bagel.  From Super Market delivery!  Put some BUTTER on that sucker.  After it's been toasted!  I'll eat that no problem.  Not too much butter.  Maybe roughly A TABLESPOON.  Or a TEASPOON.  I can picture the kind of Spoon Size but I'm not sure if it's table or tea.  I think table!  YEAH IT IS TABLE.  Wow!  This is the kind of spoon you use on A TABLE not when you're using TEA.  Get with the program!  I wonder what kind of Fun Time I'm gonna take a shower today.  Could it be only an hour or two later than usual?  Maybe in MID TO LATE AFTERNOON?  PERHAPS AN EVENING SHOWER IS IN THE WORKS?!?!  I don't believe it it's gonna be a fun mix-em-up and it could be pretty much any time!  Amazing.  The Mets have 30 games left in Season.  I feel like if they go 22-8 or better they can make the playoffs most likely.  That's DOABLE.  Also DOABLE should be said like a mispronunciation of DOUBLE.  WHICH IS A BASEBALL TERM.  Wow all the pieces are finally starting to come together.
    
Cool.  That just means they need to win 7 out of 10 games three times in a row PLUS JUST ONE BONUS EXTRA WIN.  Wow when you put it that way... it really adds... some context... I guess... couldn't HURT re: context I suppose... maybe it can...  What else is going on.  Also that's not a sure thing to be enough wins.  THEY MAY NEED A COUPLE MORE.  OH NO I'M SCARED.  What else is going on.  The good news is THEY'RE PLAYING MEANINGFUL GAMES IN SEPTEMBER.  Presumably.  They haven't yet but based on my understanding their next game will be relatively meaningful.  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED we can all go home now.  What else is going on and crap.  OH NO now they're saying rain will start in 40 minutes.  Looks like light rain though according to the Majority Report.  Presumably there's a Minority precog report that says Actually It's gonna HAIL.  But we don't have to worry about that probably.  Anyway I forget.
     Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna have coffee with Act III!  I don't believe it.  I'll drink some stuff that is coffee.  That's how that goes.  Also the buttons to press AND HOW TO PRESS THEM for each individual KIND of pitch is different.  Way to pitch fastball is different than curveball.  And they're both different than changeup.  And ALL THREE are different than slider and well you get the point.  I've been mostly trying to throw fastballs because I feel that should be the easiest to pitch.  Not much luck with that though.  Anyway.  I feel like if you can intentionally walk someone with the bases loaded so they don't score even MORE than one run, you should be able to forfeit games so that you don't ultimately lose by EVEN MORE.  You can forfeit a game so that you don't lose by 25 runs.  Regular generic standard forfeit loss is less embarrassing!
    Great.  This paragraph is almost over.  Only been a half hour by the time this act is over since last walk but I feel like I'll take a walk anyway.  Get it over with!  I got nothing better to do Between Acts.  So great there's that.  Maybe have that bagel for lunch.  That's what I'm imagining.  Nice hearty bagel.  Got three mini-wings leftover.  If I needed to eat some more I could have one OR TWO of those.  I could have THREE I guess.  That would make sense re: eating food I have BUT it could be too much for a single meal.  You heard it here first.  These wings were a letdown.  I can think of a dozen things I could have gotten and enjoyed more last night.  What a disappointment.  Oh well that's life I guess.  Eating food you don't like and then feeling jipped.  What a let down!  I'll be back in a little bit.

 

 

I'm Going To Stop Now For Now

    Hello friends.  No rain on Walk #3!  Can take shower when this act is over roughly!  Nice long break before Walk #4 where I can watch ENTIRE MOVIE and THEN SOME.  Wow!  Some SHUTTER movie.  Got coffee going.  Bagel waiting in the wings!  Kids Chicken Parm after that!  IT'S TODAY GET ON BOARD WITH IT OR SHIP OUT.  GOOGLE DID JAVY BAEZ FIND HIS EARRING.  As of 18 hours ago NOT YET.  No updates since then!  I'm on the edge of my seat!  I want the last 2 games to be GOOD FEELINGS AND VIBES for everyone and Javy Baez is RIGHT IN THE MIDDLE OF THAT EVERYONE.  Him losing A DIAMOND?  He's not gonna pumped about that!  The mets can't get anything right!  Even when they win baseball games THEY LOSE DIAMONDS.  Baseball Diamond.  Is that a thing.  Probably.  If I had worked it out and said it in a more clever way.  Oh well too late to go back now.
    
What else is going on.  I don't think I've ever owned a piece of jewelry.  I feel like I had a chain necklace at some point.  Let's say roughly 3rd to 7th grade.  Not the entire time.  For a month or something somewhere in that time period.  I don't know what the point of it was but it rings some sort of bell.  Anyway.  Had Ring Pops several time.  It's candy you wear on your finger.  A sucking candy.  You know like how people suck rings all the time.  Now it's made of candy for convenience.  Hmm I'd eat some candy now.  Even a ring pop!  I can see myself enjoying one of those.  Oh well too bad that's life.  I can HEAR it raining now.  Maybe this No Shower When During Normal Time was a blessing in disguise!  As a curse!  Or at least as something Relatively Neutral!  The good news is hey great how about that what else is going on.
    
Wow!  I got Toostie Pops.  That's even better than ring pops!  If I really wanted A Candy right now I know where to look.  Oh well such is life.  Gotta add gum to Super market order.  Oh well such is life.  I hope I toast upcoming bagel appropriately.  Not too dark and not too light.  ALSO I hope I am able to cut it evenly.  AND cut it without smooshing it.  ALSO I am able to put on the amount of butter I want AND it equates to enough butter as I would want TO EAT.  ALSO I hope the process of putting on butter isn't too intensive and I can get it done relatively quickly.  Also I hope I can eat bagel SOMEWHAT not too quickly AND it fills me up.  LOTS of things can go wrong with this lunch.  But let's face it LOTS of things can GO RIGHT.  That's one way to look at it.  There's roughly 20 ways to look at it.  That's definitely at least one or two!  Huh.
    
Penultimate paragraph!  Oh Hey what kind of Patriotism Days do we got going for Upcoming Month.  WELL GET A LOAD OF THIS  September 17th is CONSTITUTION DAY.  September 11th is PATRIOT DAY.  Oh I see what they did there.  At first it didn't ring ANY sort of bell but now I'm like oh okay 911 is Patriotism Day now makes sense.  Gonna have to do some research on CONSTITUTION day.  I'm assuming it's a reference to The American Constitution.  Not other meanings of the word.  Pretty safe assumption!  September 12 is GRANDPARENT'S DAY.  Now THAT'S a holiday I can get behind.  I never knew any grandparents enough to have feelings about them but the CONCEPT of Grandparents such as in TV and Film?  WONDERFUL.  I'll celebrate them once a year sure why not it's not too intensive.  Labor Day is September 6th.  That's sort of a Patriotism Day.  It's BETTER than Patriotism Day that's my impression.  What else.  Oh.  The paragraph is over.  Such is life.
    
Last paragraph.  ALSO 9/11 is PATRIOT DAY not PATRIOTISM Day.  I'd prefer Patriotism Day but oh well I'm not in charge.  I should be but I'm not!  Moving on.  I thought Patriot Day was the Boston Marathon Bombing based on Film Titles.  Why would Films lie to us?  They have no motive.  What else is going on.  It's a good thing we have Patriot Day because it's a good way to weed out the non-patriots because we can spot them Not Celebrating Patriot Day On September 11ths.  Let's separate the wheat from the chaff!  Which is an expression for some reason.  Possibly porridge related.  Anyway what else is going on.  The entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-1:17 P.M.

 

 

 

     

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