October 22, 2021
I Think You're An Idiot
Hello friends. Friday entry! That means that I may have to
accept a super market delivery some time during Act I. FUN.
Then I get to put stuff on oak tag on floor. I get to put stuff from
oak tag into freezer and fridge. THEN RECALIBRATE FOR LATER.
Hey why is it called Oak Tag this is neither Oak nor Tag. Maybe Tag.
I don't know what Tag means in this context. But this is definitely
NOT of an Oak Tree. Oak Trees are brown or something. This
is white! You can't fool me with the obvious lie! Hmm what
color are trees. I feel like this should be obvious but now I'm in
my head about it. I'm definitely leaning towards brown.
Better LTURQ. GREEN? THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT. Green
DID occur to me but I was like nah I'm thinking of LEAVES. Leaves
are green. Trees can't be green. Then we wouldn't even notice
the leaves. Anyway I lost track of why I was talking about that.
As soon as I forget Why I was talking about something,
time to move on! Hmm sounds like I'd be in Constant Motion then.
On account of there never being a Why. Hmm. Looks like Alec
Baldwin killed someone. It was bound to happen one day! Anyway I
wish him the best of luck in getting over accidental manslaughter.
Gotta imagine he's slightly miffed about the whole deal. Unless he did
it on purpose! In which case well done congratulations on getting
what you want out of life. How come my first thought was poor
Alec Baldwin having to get over this ordeal and not uhhh shouldn't be
be investigated for killing someone even if it was an accident.
Movie stars don't go on trial! It'd be a waste of time! Jury has
their mind made up about movie stars already! FOR BETTER OR WORSE.
LOOK I have heard the phrase accidental manslaughter and it must have
been in a Legal Law sense so Yes This Crime Does Exist. ALRIGHT.
Then again the person who died was the Director of
Photography? And the other guy who got shot is the Super Overall
Director? Maybe this one of their faults? Also is it weird
that I assumed it was another actor he shot and it turned out to be the
crew? How do you accidentally shoot the director? Why was he
aiming guns and shooting them in the first place? These are questions
I assume we'll get some half assed LYING answers to and I look forward to
having my interest assuaged. What else is going on. Look I'm
more or less an Alec Baldwin fan but murdering people is WHERE I DRAW THE
LINE. Not on board! Also let's be honest I was barely an Alec
Baldwin fan to begin with. Factoring everything I know and have seen
about Alec Baldwin he was BARELY in positive territory. Just above
negative territory and Absolute Neutral Territory. It's my dream
one day that all people will be considered equal in Absolute Neutral
Territory. But we'll never get there as long as we keep shooting
Whatever. Penultimate paragraph before Coffee!
Don't have soda or vitamin water for this morning. Having a spare
water bottle! Every now and then you get free water bottles from
delivery places. Not 100% why. I'll take it, though! Gotta
look up a picture of Alec Baldwin's daughter. And see if his concerned
fathering re: Her weight worked or not. Better LTURQ. Alec
Baldwin has 3 daughters. Google WHICH DAUGHTER DID ALEC BALDWIN
INSULT. Hmm looks like it was Ireland Baldwin. Now to
check what her general weight looks like. Looks healthy to me!
Good for her. Good for HIM. Now we know with the benefit of Time
Passed that he was Absolutely Right in whatever parenting he did re: The
Important Issue of Her weight. Worked out for the best! Also her
name is Ireland. Not sure how I feel about that! If
anything I think Alec Baldwin should have mocked her for her name so that by
now she'd new a new name. A better name! Wonderful.
Fifth paragraph. Wonderful. Also Alec
Baldwin ain't exactly the thinnest man in the world. I'm assuming Thin
Man: The Monster is. That's where he got his name from. How are
those girls doing who killed their friend because of Thin Man: The Monster.
Also are they still scared of Thin Man? I'd like an update! I
think I'm DUE an update. I've waited more than long enough!
Anyway. I think part of the premise of thin man is like he's always
watching you just beyond your peripheral vision but he's always there.
No peripheral vision in a jail cell! Surrounded by walls in a small
small room. You'd definitely see him if he was there. So you
gotta look at the bright side. As long as you're in prison you're
safe! YEAH. They might have common rooms in the day time,
I dunno! In which case Yes Thin Man Might Be Watching Them There.
It's a good thing Alec Baldwin had a Comedy Central Roast a few
years ago. Per my memory. Cause man oh man this is great fodder.
Hey Remember The Tine you KILLED SOMEONE?!?! What were you
thinking??!! That sort of thing. Hmm I'd eat some roast
Poultry or Beef. Or some other kind of meat. Sounds
delicious. Anyway. How many people in the world have killed
someone. 1%? More? Gotta be more. This includes
WAR. War happens all the time. It's happening right now!
That's my guess. I dunno. I'm sure there'll be a thorough
investigation into why Alec Baldwin Went Crazy And Tried To Kill Everyone.
Does he feel his daughter isn't thin enough? She looked healthy to me!
Either way I anticipate following this story Detail By Detail as it comes
out to Us The General Public.
One day I'd like to be a member of The Specific Public.
Or The Deputy Lieutenant Public. Or the... c'mon there's half a
dozen other definitions of general. And thus half a dozen other
antonyms. I'd look this up on google but eh oh well what are ya
gonna do. What else is going on. I imagine it's gonna be
hard for Alec Baldwin to find work after this. Nobody wants to risk
getting killed! That's the OPPOSITE of what people want. Most
of the time at least. I was watching a scene from Beetlejuice
a day or two ago and I was like I know Alec Baldwin and THAT IS NO ALEC
BALDWIN. He doesn't look like Alec Baldwin yet in 1989.
Doesn't sound like him enough, either! Now to check if I am a
Release Date Genius Again and if it was made in 1989... NINETEEN EIGHTY
EIGHT?!?! Well this is terrible news. Alright back up thing
to redeem myself-- DID I SPELL BEETLEJUICE CORRECTLY. Yes, Yes
I Did! AND YOU ALL DOUBTED ME.
I think Robin Williams character cleverly named his
alter ego Mrs. Doubtfire because it gets into her client's head I
DOUBT You'd Ever Want To FIRE Me. So that way she continues
working indefinitely even if she does a mediocre job. It's clever
subliminal messaging from Robin Williams Character! Hmm.
Eighth paragraph. I've seen Beetlejuice several times and I'm still
Not Sure Exactly What Beetlejuice Is. When I was a kid there was an
animated kids show based on Beetlejuice. Where he's an unambiguous
Good Guy whose friends with Lydia. And they get into adventures or
whatever. And that didn't confuse me. In the movie now though as
an adult I DON'T GET IT. His personality traits, what he's supposed to
do or be, where he comes from, his state of being alive or dead. I
guess I'll have to revisit it another 20 times and by the end of that I'd
presumably FINALLY be like ...Oh I guess that is Significantly Enough
Alec Baldwin. I don't have a problem with this being Alec Baldwin
Penultimate paragraph. I assume there's
someone somewhere right now combing through Alec Baldwin's past to see if
there's been any previous suspicious deaths. Gotta be SOMEONE'S
job somewhere, right? I guess now Alec Baldwin will meet Beetlejuice
Again IN HELL. Not sure what that means exactly. Alec
Baldwin is Going To Hell Now, that's one thing it means. Beetlejuice
exists in Hell somehow, that's another thing it seems to imply.
Whatever what else is going on. Gotta imagine Alec Baldwin will
donate 10,000 dollars to the victims of, "Accidental," Gun Violence to
smooth this one over. That should do the trick! Also the
Quotation Emphasis is HIS. Not mine! Hmm seems like an odd
way for him to put it. Oh well who am I to argue. Some
guy. Oh that checks out. Anyway. Alec Baldwin is
getting up there in years. Maybe killing someone and a half was on his
bucket list. Shot two people. One died. One recovered.
Gotta imagine in his mind this counts as One And A Half Killings.
Maybe. Depends on how seriously injured this Other Guy Was/Is!
Last paragraph of the act is the point. The
point is even the guy who survived presumably Got The Message. Ugh.
The point is I'm not sure if they're gonna continue production of this movie
at all! They'd need to start all over with a brand new Director Of
Photography. Unless the old one had a twin. In which case
they're the same person?? Huh. What to watch between
Entry and Accepting Super Market Delivery. Well this is a no
brainer continue watching Tales From That Crypt. Sounds good
enough to me! I feel like Beetlejuice and The Crypt Keeper would
really get along with each other. They seem like natural best friends.
This isn't a joke. It's something I feel strongly. I wanna
set them up and see for myself how great they hit it off. Huh.
I GET The Crypt Keeper though. Much more than I get Beetlejuice.
Hmm. Anyway I'll be back a little bit later!
You Know Who You Are
Hey! Accepted Super Market Delivery. So far my favorite
part by far is the individual portions of Snapple which are relatively
large. We're talkin' a 12 pack of 16 oz Diet Lemon Snapple!
The only way this could be better is if it was a FOURTEEN PACK.
The way it stands I can have two a day for the entire week! Except for
one day! Which I have none! But that's the price of doing
business! Well we settled all the important life updates now we can
move on with my life. Also it's no longer in glasses. Now
its in plastics! Probably better for the environment. Wait no
that might be inaccurate. Probably more cost effective for
Snapple. Yeah! Maybe they pass some of those savings onto
US!!! Anything's possible! Suffice to say No Snap Sound
when opening the plastic bottle. There goes that. Okay so
NOW we settled all the important business. I thought we had it settled
halfway into the paragraph but it turns out there was more.
Think I just may watch DUNE tonight. Kind of concerned
I won't be able to follow what's going on! Seems too complicated.
Wait. There's MULTIPLE PLANETS? And MORE THAN ONE CHARACTER?
And possibly TWO OR THREE THEMES? Too much for me! Count me out!
Except I'll give it a shot anyway. Count me in! I've never been
a big Science Fiction fan. WELL IS IT SCIENCE OR IS IT FICTION.
These two concepts aren't complete opposites but they're pretty close!
That sort of thing. Also from what I can tell, Dune is Fiction.
Most Science Fiction is actually Fiction. Off the top of my head that
sounds accurate. If it was more Science than Fiction they'd just call
it Science! The point is what else is going on. Looking forward
to taking a bath. It'll be a solid 24 hours since looking at my belly
Last Time I Took A Bath. I've lost roughly a fifth of a pound since
then per my estimations. That'll show up somehow maybe a little bit
I think in Dune they harvest Spice? That's the
synthetic Marijuana Bath Salt, right? Wonder why in the future that's
by far the most valuable resource in the universe. I guess it must be
a little bit more perfected than Current Marijuana Bath Salts. Because
as of now they're pretty dangerous! I guess in a million years they
tweak the formula a bit to make it safer. Hmm makes sense.
Look despite spending 10 paragraphs besmirching Alec Baldwin, solid 80
percent chance this was a mistake. And within that 80%, solid
Another 80% chance that it wasn't even his fault. It could be a
mistake and him be ultimately responsible for the goof-em-up. Or it
could be a mistake and we can blame it on some other idiot. I guess
we'll find out! The point is I wonder if Alec Baldwin will give up his
co-conspirators in an attempt to reduce his own prison time and get a better
sentence. My guess? I dunno I don't know Alec Baldwin that
well. I don't know him at all. Only what I've Seen On The T.V.
Penultimate paragraph of the act. I don't
believe it! I already finished my first bottle of snapple. How
terrible! Luckily I got bonus soda. I should be okay overall
beveragewise. It's just a matter of strategically drinking the snapple
so I get the most out of it instead of blowing it all within a period of
half a day. Huh. If you think I'm gonna spend 2.5 hours
watching Dune then YOU'RE The Science Fiction! Yeah. What
a Slam. I slammed you good! Well it's half a slam on you and
half a slam on Dune. And half a slam on My Ability To Watch Dune.
The point is there's a lot of slamming going around with this thing I said
and no one is coming out unscathed! Huh. The point is I
never thought I'd like Lord Of The Rings but 20 years after the movie came
out I actually did end up liking it! So at this rate I'll like Dune
by the time Dune is actually takes place! Great!
Last paragraph before Cleansing exercise. The point is
if Star Wars took place a long time ago and Dune takes place a long time in
the future man oh man are they taking place a long time apart from each
other. Wonderful. Great content you're getting here on this
website! Definitely worth reading. Hmm. Gonna take a bath.
Kinda wonder if bath salts are any good re: Their Presumable Actual Purpose.
What do they do? Make it smell nice? Make the bath Carbonated?
Not 100% sure what bath salts are. Solid chance that bath salts
don't even pretend to have a real non-drug use. I'd look into it
but I don't care enough. So you could see the kind of predicament I'm
in. Huh. Hmm we're deep enough into the entry when we can start
considering how much of this have I said before. Off the top of
my head let's go with the easy estimation and say 50%. Also
there's no going under the top of my head. This is my off-the-cuff
estimation and that's all we're getting for now! Be back soon.
Now It's Later Than It Was Before
Hey! Time to write five more paragraphs. Crunched the numbers
and I'm gonna cut diet in half at the end of the month! Or more
accurately the beginning of the next month. I will start new diet
parameters 12:00 AM November 1st. WOW I GET TO DO STUFF LIKE EAT
MORE. Life may not be great but at least we get to eat shit every
now and then. So I got that going for me! Gonna have coffee
after this paragraph. Got THAT going for me. Hmm what's a
third thing I have going for me. Looking forward to being able to
buy marijuana legally and easily! I think I'll get a kick out of
that. May bother me and I hate it! May love it! Only one
way to find out. WAIT. Then try it. Then see
what happens! Also the combination of Eating shit AND smoking
marijuana? WOW now we're talking really solid way to let life pass
by until you're ready to die.
Cool. Variety Is the Spice Of Life. Is
that relevant to Dune. My guess is yes vaguely. In
the meantime though let's write four paragraphs and then have a great Rest
Of The Day. I assume I will Not Watch Dune. I think that would
make my Day Worse! Look might I get something out of watching
Dune. Maybe! But ON AVERAGE I would get MORE out of some other
thing in the 50th percentile of Things To Do. Other than Dune.
So my best option is take a chance and do something else instead!
Amazing. Is there footage of Alec Baldwin shooting his victims.
They were on a film set! Probably lots of cameras around.
Perhaps there were people shooting a MAKING OF The Film. Gotta
imagine that's a decent chance there's A Brand New Snuff Film Out There!
I envy people who are into snuff films. They have something great to
look forward to! No judgment. What else is going on.
Wait a second YES Judgment. Don't be into snuff films!
That will only encourage More Snuff Films! Also it's just weird and
scary! Hmm I've given us all a lot to think about.
Third paragraph of the act!
Amazing. LOOK is there a niche market for Snuff Snuff Films?
A film showing the filming of a snuff film? Because that may be in the
cards! Like I said they could have been shooting a Making Of for the
DVD release of Whatever This Movie Alec Baldwin Was Making Is. Hmm
a lot of the logic of this doesn't check out. But that's to be
expected when you read this website. So we got that going for us.
Anyway. Gonna take a 30-45 minute long break between Entry and
Upcoming Future Walk. I can live with that! Why shouldn't I be
able to live with that. It's relatively positive for me! I get
to do whatever dumb stuff I want that's the same as yesterday. I
remember yesterday. I solidly remember some of it being vaguely
neutral! Can't argue with that!
Cool. Gonna shave this weekend. Two weeks
since last time! Time to grow up and shave myself Basically Often
Enough. How often do I have to cut my hair to be Basically Grown Up
Often Enough. My guess is every 3 months is pushing it. Maybe
every 2 months. Amazing. What if I wore a hat all the
time. Then no one would be the wiser. I'D know. And
that's what matters. I guess. HMM I gotta have a nice Mets
Cap somewhere. I remember having it in the past! Maybe I could
start wearing that for style. And for comfort! And apparently to
disguise my uncut hair. Doesn't really DISGUISE the hair. It
covers it up. It doesn't make the hair look like other hair.
That's what disguising would be! The point is Hmm wonder where that
hat is. Also I think people would respect me more if I wore a Mets hat
around town. Go figure.
Last paragraph of the day! Amazing.
GREAT JUST GREAT. The next Tales From That Crypt episode I have
chronologically is the last one I watched before starting at Season 1
Episode 1 All Over Again. Now I gotta watch it AGAIN.
That hardly seems fair. But I don't make the rules! No one does.
There are no rules! Better make some arbitrary rules for myself so
I have some semblance of structure. First rule is gotta watch
next episode chronologically even if I already watched it recently.
Okay. Wonderful. Settled that! What else is going on.
Does Earth exist as part of the story in Dune. I'd like at
least One Planet I Can Relate To. That's my hot take on Dune.
That and whatever I said before. Off the top of my head it was mostly
making several puns with the term spice. Amazing. Hey
that's it for today! I'll be back tomorrow.
October 21, 2021
I Insist This Be Okay
Hey friends! Went to get blood work done. I accepted them taking
blood work. I accepted them taking my blood pressure! Many
Times! They took blood pressure sitting and standing. Way
too low! Drink some water. They did 'em both again! Way
too low! Drank some water. They did 'em both again! Too
Low but We'll Settle! Wonderful. I'd rather have low
pressure high blood pressure. Hmm. Not sure about that.
Well I'd rather have low blood pressure sitting down and high blood pressure
standing up. They even themselves out! As long as I'm Crouching
All The Time. Which I would want to be anyway! So I'm really
coming out on top in this scenario that I made up. Anyway all that
delayed my day about an hour. Hours are nothing! I laugh at the
prospect of an hour messing my day up. Ha-Ha! That sort
of thing. I have too many good options for dinner and I've already
suggested them too much. I suggested to my Dad we get Deli. I
suggested to my Mom we make Frenched Toast. And to myself I'll
admit I have 1 or 2 other options I'd probably prefer over these two!
I'm gonna look like a jerk to One if not BOTH of my parents re: How Dinner
Ends Up. Why couldn't I just keep my big mouth shut!
Oh well. That's not Dinner Talk. That's
Getting Ahead Of Myself Talk. Why must I commit myself to things
before I'm ready. Makes me feel like a big man. Big man with
a plan. Also can't just keep it to myself. I need everyone
around me to know I'm A Big Man With A Plan. Also explicitly
saying my plan makes me wanna Not Do It even more. That's life I
guess. Watched episode 2 of Chucky: The Television Programme.
Okay! I still enjoy it happening! I saw a clip of Brad Duorif,
the voice of Chucky, after the show. They were discussing the making
of the show or something. TOO OLD. I'd like to see Brad
Dourif 10, 15 years younger. That's my one note. Dourif.
Do Ur RIFF? I was gonna do that anyway, Brad! Once I come up
with a riff at least. Then I'll do it like nobody's business.
Kind of like its other peoples' businesses. That's how they
Third paragraph. I like the every-now-and-then
parts of TV Show where it hits Nostalgia Childhood buttons. Hey
THIS MUSIC reminds me of the music they played in Childhood III. By
which I mean Child's Play III. I dunno why I wrote Childhood III.
Fruedish Slip or something. Either way HEY I WAS A KID WHEN
THAT HAPPENED IN THE FIRST PLACE. So I got that going for me.
It's fun to remember being a kid! Being a kid was All Good Times 100%!
When watching TV at least. And that's EXACTLY what I was doing
when watching Childplay III. What else is going on. Any sort of
stadium or arena where you could have Crowd Audience Seats directly above
the field. Probably would need a Roofed arena. But why not hang
some seats from the very top. Pop up could hit them.
That's why there's a NET you idiot.
Also I feel like if you hit a pop up Past The Ceiling
Net that's a home run? You hit it out of the park Vertically.
Well done, circle them bases, you did the best thing you can do as a
Baseball. Any thought on Underground Baseball? Where there's
holes and hidden passageways underground. Either for ball to be hit
and fielded or maybe for runners to run. My guess? I hope
not. Anyone who thought that has got lots of problems going for them.
There's a headline on Official Mets Page/Blog about Billy Beane not making
it personal that he turned down becoming Mets GM. It's a FRONT PAGE
HEADLINE. I did it for me personal reasons Not Because Mets Are
Jerks! This is a huge scoop that One Person Says He's Doesn't
Totally Despise Or Hold Grudges Against Mets Leadership. I thought
it was vaguely amusing. Now I roped you into this situation.
Coffee after this paragraph is done! Wonderful.
Besides committing myself to meals I don't want, what else do I have in
store for the day. Hmm. Building up the COURAGE to have meals
I haven't committed to. Just bite the bullet and be like ya
know what, Mom, Dad? Gonna have something else. Dunno what yet!
And maybe just maybe it'll be what we discussed. But probably not.
Suffice to say this isn't because I despise or hold grudges against you.
It's just for me personal reasons. Something along those lines.
I feel like I 10% despise my parents and 35% hold grudges against them.
NOT BAD. I feel like those numbers are pretty respectable for how
well families can relate to each other. I have twin daughters
entering Catholic High School in Oakland this year! I can't suddenly
mix things up and be having Bens Deli For Dinner! Wonderful.
I assume Catholic people go out of their way to not eat
Kosher food. I also would have assumed people who live in Oakland
would go out of their way to not live in Oakland, though! So I guess
Billy Beane is the exception that proves the rule. Finally we found
an exception to the rule! ONCE AND FOR ALL IT'S BEEN PROVED.
I have no idea what that phrase is supposed to mean and I really have no
idea how it started because presumably it started based on some sort
of weird scientific logic. SOMEONE came up with it and I'm gonna get
to the bottom of this perhaps the next time I think about it. Probably
not though. Probably never! Hey that's life. I got
coffee going on. I'm guessing over 50% of Christians think Jews go out
of their way to hate Jesus. I don't mean 2000 years ago. I mean
now. Billy Beane (classic example of a Catholic) thinks I'm just
sitting around stewing THAT DAMN CHRIST I HATE HIM SO MUCH. And
he's Hardly Even A TENTH Right!
What else is going on. Seventh paragraph!
Wonderful. Gotta have some good stuff in store for the day.
Hmm. I can think of a lot of not TERRIBLE stuff. That's
kind of good? Could be worse! That's my new motto of life
lately. It's from that part in Jurassic Park where John Hammond and
the Jurassic Park Team are lamenting the Snooze of a Tour that the main
characters got at Jurassic Park. None of the dinosaurs showed up and
it rained and they to cut it short. And Samuel L Jackson is like it
could have been worse. it could have been A Lot worse.
That's how I feel about life this week! What else is going on.
Also spoiler alert IT GETS A LOT WORSE. In the movie and I guess
most likely in life! We'll just have to wait and see. Then again
it also gets a lot better! Look, a third of the main characters die on
the way to the end, but those remaining sure had a weekend they'll never
forget!!! Unless if it takes place during the week. Then I
Don't Know What To Say.
Eighth paragraph! Wonderful. This may
or may not be universal but I'm Okay With Low Blood Pressure. Everyone
knows high blood pressure is common and a bad thing. So I see I got
low blood pressure? My first Thought-Instinct is this is Great I'm
Way Ahead Of The Game! I'm not proud of it. I'm a little
proud of it! What else is going on. Another :08 Baseball
game today. 8:08. At least That's A Thing. Like a Drum
Machine or something. I don't have all the details. Also you
remove the colon. Otherwise the drum machine won't function properly.
Huh. I feel like you get a point for every time you eat something
Kosher and you lose three points every time you don't. If you die with
a positive number you go to Heaven. Also that's the ONLY criteria.
Also I think in Judaism there's no Hell? But there's still gotta be
SOME reward for Life Well Lived. Heaven Heaven and Hell Heaven.
Hmm maybe I'd rather go to Hell Heaven. No. That can't be
Penultimate paragraph of the act! I don't believe
it. The point is if you want to eat a lot of Non-Kosher Foods your
main way to game the system is over eat a lot. Eat A LOT of Kosher
Foods even if you're not hungry to make up for the Lots of Non-Kosher Foods
you like to eat. Wonderful. At what point is Kosh a slang
among teenager girls for cool. At this point? In the
early 2000's? I guess we'll never know for sure. Why does it
have to be among teenager girls. And why does it have to be slang for
Cool. I DON'T KNOW. What you think I have the answers?
I Have No Answers! What else is going on. Also for the
people who die in Jurassic Park, at least they died doing what they loved.
Getting eaten by dinosaurs. Huh. Not enough people dying
from being Stomped On by a giant herbivore. Possibly NEVER in the 5
Jurassic Park/World Films. I feel like we're owed at least ONE Death
By Unintentional Stomping. Also those are my porn search
parameters. Unintentional Stomping. Prove me wrong!
Last paragraph of the act! I'm GUESSING stomping
is stomping on testicles and/or penis. And I'm ASSUMING unintentional
means unintentional. Hmm. You can stomp on People In
General. Gonna have to look into this one. Or not. I'm
definitely leaning towards the Or Not for now! Then again who
knows what the future holds. What else is going on. Maybe
there's intentional stomping going on amongst big herbivores. They get
nothing tangible out of killing humans but maybe they're just jerks!
Anyway. They checked my weight At Blood Work and I again told them not
to tell me. I also won't want them to tell me in Mid November.
PROBABLY not in Mid December. Once we're in Mid January I will almost
definitely be done dieting based on both My Calculations Of My Weight
and My Being Okay With What I Look At In Mirror. So basically anything
they say can't hurt me!! Maybe a little bit of a sting! But not
too bad! Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.
It's Good To Have Standards
may have written a lot of this before. I may have written a lot of
this Not before! This is the price you pay when you write So Much
Nonsense Every Day. Got a delivery earlier before my walk meant for a
different address. Since I was taking walk anyway I went to bring it
to them. SAW THE UPS GUY IN THE PROCESS. Confronted him!
He was embarrassed BUT NOT ENOUGH. Also he doubled back in the
direction of my house and I was like nope these two are both packages you
left me here ya go. Then he was like YEAH BUT WHAT ABOUT THE
OTHER MISTAKES I'VE MADE. Wonderful. Maybe I got scammed by
a fake UPS uniform and a fake UPS Truck. That's the price we pay when
we're too lazy to demand proper authentication! Anyway what else is
going on. Am I supposed to watch Dune today. I don't
know. I don't have a high opinion of Dune. Takes place in
Desert! I wouldn't wanna be in a desert in real life, why should I
want to be in it through the power of Entertainment.
Huh. I'd be in some deserts I guess for limited
amounts of time. But that's where I draw the line! What line.
The Limited Amounts Of Time Line. Hmm. It's called desert
because if you're deserted in the desert that's the worst
place you can be deserted. Off the top of my head. Whatever.
OH I know what I can do today. I came up with it last night! Go
through all the Tales From The Crypts again in chronological order!
SO FAR I'm 2.25 EPISODES IN. This is going to be fun.
Because it's EASY and SAFE and COMFORTABLE. I know what I'm getting
and I'm getting exactly what I wanna be getting! Is there episode
which take place in desert? YES off the top of my head two.
Hmm. One episode partly takes place in Las Vegas and an area
presumably within a hundred or two hundred miles of Las Vegas. Does
that count? My guess? No. What else is going
on. Hmm I've only been thinking of The Wild Wild West desert.
Maybe there's episodes in other deserts. NOPE I DON'T THINK SO.
Well I'm glad we settled this once and for all. Important Subject
Down! Now we can move on to the next important subject. How
many episodes of Tales From The Crypt in The Tundra.
What else is going on. I really bought this
guy was a UPS delivery guy. Hook line and sinker. I guess I'm
some sort of gullible fool oh well what can ya do. I'd rather Trust
Everyone and be wrong 50% of the time than Trust No One and be wrong...
50% of the time again? That's how that math would work I think.
The same amount of people out there are trustworthy whether I trust them or
not, assuming I'm dealing with the exact same people. Which may not be
the case. I might choose to deal with a different set of people
depending on how trustworthy I am. Huh.
Either way I TRUST THIS ONE GUY. Not to deliver packages properly.
He's shown me he's TERRIBLE at that. But I trust him to actually work
for UPS. And not be disgruntled. And he's making mistakes by
accident rather than through some grand evil design. Then again I
hadn't really thought about that until just now. Maybe it's part
of a grand evil design. Gonna have to look into that one.
Penultimate paragraph of the act. Honestly
when I was getting back from my walk after interacting with him at start of
walk I was 5% worried the packages would be back in front of my door.
And of that 5%, 80% worried that it was a bomb and meant to blow up my
house, and 20% worried man this guy just never learns! What
else is going on. Also it was 2 packages. Two envelope packages.
Maybe I've been unclear these paragraphs. One delivery from one
delivery person but it was two separate envelopes. TOO LATE FOR ME
TO CLEAR THINGS UP NOW. YOU'VE BEEN CONFUSED FOR THE LAST TWO HOURS.
It takes you two hours to read three and a half paragraphs? MY
three and a half paragraphs YEAH. Wonderful! Man oh man I'm
helping you and/or me kill a lot of time. Good for me! And/or
you! What else is going on. Now that I think about it I'm kind
of okay with the plans I've made re: committing to upcoming meals.
So in the end everything works out in life.
Gonna have to look into that one. In the mean
time let's finish this act. I feel like there's a standard high school
test called The Act and I never took it. Some sort of off brand SAT
test. Who needs it. We got the SAT. Be happy with that!
I got THINGS to do I can't take an Acting Test! Also I think a good
grade on the ACT is like a 23. I feel like the normal range of
grades in ACT is like 18 through 25. Better LTURQ. Looks like
you can score between a 1 and a 36. And 20 is standard. Hmm I
was giving these people who get in the low 20's WAY too much credit.
I rescind my acceptance letter for them to my college! I'll refer them
to A Worse College though to save them some time. I'm not a MONSTER.
I want to help SOMEHOW. Ugh. For me though I feel like
I'd Like My Act Grade Like I Like My Age-- 32. I'd be okay with a 32!
Ugh. Hey the act is over. I'll be back in a little bit!
I'm not sure I Like My Age. I like referring to my age as 32
because it's accurate. Kind of would rather be 18, though! Let's
talk about it! I'll be back in a little bit.
I Made It Through The Day So Far
Hey! Took a bath. Doing okay re: Schedule For Today.
Behind Normal but Ahead Of Being Behind Enough Such That It Is A Problem!
What else do I got going for me. I don't mean to brag but I watched
.75 of a Tales From The Crypts episode and now I am solidly up to episode 4.
I kind of do mean to brag. It's an important point, other people must
know it, and it must make them think more highly of me. So I got
that going for me. Anyway. Wonder what my blood pressure would
be like right now. One can only imagine. Also every time I'm
asked in a scenario like this have you drank any water today I gotta
make a snap decision well do I just answer whether I've drank water or
whether I've drank FLUIDS. No I don't drink water ever that's
disgusting. I drink a lot of soda, though! There's water in
soda! If I had to guess it's probably HALF water! Anyway today I
just said no. Felt easier in the moment. I've talked
about that before. I'll talk about it again. It's not my fault
if it comes up twice every month.
It kind of is my fault. Sort of 60% my fault.
In the meantime though what else is going on. Gotta nice today ahead
of me I guess! No special New Episode of TV or Movie. But the
same special Old Episodes of TVs and Movies that were around yesterday are
still here. None of them have been taken away. So there's
that. Gotta imagine some of them have been taken away.
Across all platforms I'm sure there's a dozen or two TV or Movies
disappearing EVERY DAY. Oh No I'm Scared. They're
replaced with new things though. Oh No I'm Scared. Hmm.
Does anything not scare me. Sure lots of things don't scare me!
They're just all not Film or TV related! What else is going on.
I got enough beverage to last me the day. The question is will I have
any leftover for Tomorrow Morning 2 or 3 or So hours before new super
market delivery. The answer is probably not. Wow I
introduced a question AND I answered it! Problem Created and Problem
Wonderful. LOOK if I was drinking anything
else I'd tell the nurse. I'm ashamed to tell them soda. If
it was juice, sure I'd say that. Vodka. Fine I'll tell em.
Some sort of black market red bull that's somehow even more unhealthy.
I'd share that. NOT SODA THOUGH. MAYBE SELTZER. THAT'S
WHERE I DRAW THE LINE. I was reading an article about a baseball game
a week or two ago and it quotes one of the pitchers who refers to drinking
three red bulls before the game. I don't like that! A) probably
should be illegal to do in a baseball game. B) I'm worried for HIM
that too much. C) TERRIBLE example for kids. D) WHERE CAN I GET
THESE RED BULLS. WHY IS THIS GUY DRINKING ALL THE REDBULLS.
Ugh. Haven't had an energy drink in too long! It's been far
too long! I don't know WHY I'd want one. I just feel like I'd
get a real kick and a half out of a diet energy drink. Pitch for
Redbull-- Drink with 75% of the energy boost called... Uh... Pink Bull?
Pink is light red. But those looking for energy don't want a pinkbull!
Maybe they do! I haven't studied this population subset extensively
Penultimate paragraph! Wonderful. I think
it's great Red Bull saves a lot of money on advertisements by using generic
substandard animation. Very clever! Now they can put all that
ancillary money into R & D to develop an energy drink 75% as strong.
Let's face it there's no market in America for a Slightly Less Strong Energy
Drink. If they're developing new drinks they're obviously gonna go
in the direction of something 2000% as strong. That's what America
wants and that's what America gets! Not so much because we love
energy so much but because we are stupid and love buying stupid things when
encouraged to by interesting advertising campaigns. Also we like
energy too. Why not. Better than nothing.
Anyway hey I get to take a walk pretty soon. Maybe right after the
entry! That's Today for ya!
Last paragraph of the day. I hope so.
I can't imagine a scenario where I have to write more paragraphs that is a
positive scenario for me. Only negative ones! Hmm.
Looks like we're 1/3rd into Fall. Not bad! I'd say 1/3rd into
Fall is ROUGHLY PERFECT. Weatherwise! These days! Can't
tell you what it'd be like Weatherwise in 30 years! Can't even tell
you what it'll be like weatherwise tomorrow let alone in 30 years. But
I REALLY can't tell ya in 30 years. What else is going on. I
wonder if we'll be done burning fossil fuels in 30 years. My guess?
At that point we're pretty pot committed to it why stop then-now that's
my feeling. Besides a lot of us will be dead in 30 years.
How DARE we presume to know what's best for future generations. That's
THEIR business not ours. I dunno something like that.
I'll be back tomorrow.
October 20, 2021
One Can Never Have Enough Titles
guess. Hello friends! Just had a Zoom'd Appointment with
Therapist Person. I had forgotten it was today! Luckily I was
home when Therapist Person called me to tell me I wasn't in the appointment.
The point is that's all settled and I've been Theraputic'd for another four
weeksworth. What else is great. I had a third of a Freedom Chip
Pancake for breakfast, but the great part about that was there was a
Chocolate (Freedom) Chip on the table just now that Picked up and ate!
Hmm this tastes Chocolate And Sweet. I like the Chip Form Too.
Only complaint is it's pretty small. But if it was any bigger I'd have
to consider how many calories it was. All in all it's an interesting
experience that I can't wait to write in my diary about. This is
my diary. As far as you know!
Wonderful. As of yesterday I'm starting to go
into watching Jurassic Parks as repetition TV or Movies. Look I've
seen it 40 times already in life. THEN I watched the original trilogy
3 times in the last 3 months and that's a step up. NOW as of last
night its in the category of Tales From The Crypt that I'll just put it on
every day of the week for Background Fun. SO FAR I ONLY REGRET IT A
LITTLE. Also I watched some of it in Spanish and ENTIRELY
DIFFERENT MOVIE. Different pacing to it! When movies are in
Spanish you need some time to understand what they're saying. I
don't have time to figure out what people are talking about. There's
DINOSAURS running around. Oh No they might be coming to a
compromise in Building Back Better Again. A) Compromise is too Low!
B) They're gonna try to make it even lower C) At this point, This ain't
Build Back Better, this is Build Ba at most! They got rid of
the CK Better completely! NOW LOUIE CK WILL NEVER GET
BETTER. And then where will be as a society. NO ONE
Anyway. Zoom appointment didn't screw up my
daily schedule too much. 10-15 minutes taken up that I hadn't
anticipated. Not so bad! What else is going on.
Ancillary soda for today is Orange. Tomorrow is Sprite. Then
I RE-CALIBRATE. Not sure Ancillary is the word I want. It is
accurate. It is a solid 75% of The Word I want. I mean something
more like complimentary. Or supplemental. You get
the idea. I hope so. I've given you three words as clues for
that The Idea Is. And that doesn't even count the rest of the
context I gave you! Anyway. Wednesday! Maybe that's why
they were playing Adams' Family yesterday. Ancillary Character named
Wednesday. They wanted to prepare us for today! I believe I
recorded these movies from TV on Saturday of Sunday. The point is
still valid, though. They still wanted to prepare us for Wednesday:
The Day, they just were getting way ahead of the game
and giving us plenty of time to adjust. YEAH.
What else is going on. Creeping up to the
time that Phone Company insists I get new phone. Something about I
can't HANDLE the new amount of Coverage on my old phone. Either 5G or
6G. The current phone I have can't even get on board with that if it
tried! Amazing. A brand new phone. Maybe this time with
NO watching pornography. Not sure the logic in that. I'm
sure there's some reasons to not watch pornography on new 11G portable
phones but right now I can't think of them. Oh right That's too
many, "G's," for pornography. You're gonna want a 3G, 4G phone at
most for that sort of stuff. Huh. I looked up ON THE
INTERNET if we're going to 5G or 6G now. Presumably from the G
beforehand. NOT SURE. I know in sixth grade I was in
class 6G2. And in seventh and eighth grade I was in 7G2 and 8G2
Respectfully. Fifth grade was nothing. That was elementary
school. Also feel like I'm giving too much information away with
this. Someone wanna google 6G2, now they know about me AND my phone
watching pornography PAST habits.
Cool! Not sure why my class wasn't G1.
Seems like kind of A Disrespectful to My Class and Me: The Best Us and The
Best Me Of The Us. Also high school you're not in single class.
Each period is a new amalgamation of people. You know with
ANCILLARY players and whatnot. Get off my back about it. I
bet if someone asked Wednesday, "What's your favorite day of the
week?" Wednesday would be like, "Tuesday." And the home
audience (and people in the audience in scene where this is taking place)
would laugh and laugh. Hmm. Are there eccentric rich
people who hire people to just watch them live their lives. Live!
Just set up a room for a Sitcom-esque viewing audience in your home.
Maybe applause and laugh sign, maybe let them do it as they please!
Gotta imagine SOME weirdoes would be into that. Good idea
for an Actual TV Show though. It's a sitcom but TURNED ON ITS
HEAD. Let's get TV People working on this one. You know
Ancillary TV People.
Here's some good news for everyone.
Coffeemate Creamer lasted EXACTLY as long as I anticipated it would and has
been at the rate I've been estimating I'm consuming it. Sure I've
been pouring only roughly 90% in each cup than I used to because I wanted to
make it last this time around but other than that EXACTLY THE SAME.
So 90% the same. OR 110% I don't know how math works right now
and I've got other things to do like start a new sentence after this one.
Hey that sentence we were talking about-- it's this one! Amazing.
Got coffee going is the point. Hey here's some good news REALLY for
everyone-- looks pretty possible Javy Baez resigns with The Mets. I
like his moxie! One thing you're gonna get with Javy Baez and besides
his name being Javy Baez is that He's Got Moxie. Hmm what's the
antonym of Moxie. Off the top of my head Mixie?
Better LTURQ. Merriam Wesbter has one antonym-- inexperience.
That's way off. Not even an ancillary antonym in MY book.
Also I'm starting my own book. Moxie Definition Book. Still in
the early stages.
Seventh paragraph! I feel like the premise of
new Mets Owner this past year and a half is that he's like Don't put it
past me that I'll Be Dumb and spend All The Money! I hope so.
More money means more TALENT. More talent means TOO MUCH TALENT.
Too much talent means WE GET TO CUT SOME PEOPLE. Getting to cut some
people means NOW THERE'S SURPLUS PEOPLE LOOKING FOR OTHER JOBS.
Huh. What else is going on. Do I feel kind of like a jerk
for forgetting appointment? For about 10 seconds sure. Then I
adjusted my mindset and stopped caring because it didn't hold her up much or
anything. Maybe 2 or 3 minutes. That's nothing! I've been
held up 2 or 3 DECADES. Hmm. What else is going on.
Got new episode of CHUCKY to look forward to today. I hope I
don't mess things up and watch an episode of the FOX 2009 show CHUCK.
First gotta make sure that's a Fox show. Then that it's from 2009.
Then that there's a show Chuck at all. Maybe I should do
that in reverse order. Maybe that's how YOU do things Not
Me Though! CHUCK 2007 through 2012 NBC. We'll I was
2/3rds there. Not so bad for Chuck.
Eighth paragraph. I can get Diet Snapple for
upcoming week but it's a 12 pack of Regular Travel Sized Glass Bottle
Snapple instead of 2 or 3 plastic Larger Sized Bottles. Probably
less cost effective. Possibly less liquid overall. DEFINITELY
more fun. I like glass glasses. I get to break them by
accident and then the real fun begins. Huh. What else is
going on and crap. I hope I don't have to put on Jurassic Park
today or tonight. That means my Day didn't turn out as great as it
should have. Also my days should turn out great as a standard rule of
thumb. That's my hot take! What else is going on. I like
the turnover in Major League Baseball Managers and possible Major League
Professional Sports Managers in general. They just routinely get fired
before the end of their contract. My impression is that over 50% of
the time they don't make it the entire length! I'm assuming that means
they still have to be paid they just don't get to do their job too!
Good for them. Anyone wonder if maybe they have incentive to do a
shitty job their first season there so that they can have complete total
free time the next 2 seasons after being fired? Hmm sounds like a
decent scam. I gotta get in on that! Alright first things
first I need to make myself an attractive manager option to a Sports Team.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Maybe there's
clauses in contracts that they can be fired without pay for extenuating
circumstances. And doing a shitty job is an extenuating
circumstance. What do I know. Much like ancillary I don't
know what, "extenuating," means. I was closer on ancillary.
Extenuating I was pretty off. Hey that's part of life. Not
knowing what words mean. One day I hope to learn what the words do
mean but not today. Ugh. I think Extenuating
circumstances would be the manager being like DON'T BLAME ME for the team
sucking I was forced to deal with THESE SHITTY PLAYERS there are extenuating
circumstances! The shitty players I gotta put up with! I think
that's more or less accurate. Great! Progress. Hey what
else is going on. I can't start a, "What else is going on," the
paragraph is all but over!
Hmm. What else is going on. Also the
Chucky show is an hour long! No half hour! Also it's probably 42
minutes yes. But that's WAY more than 22 minutes. Also it's way
more than even THIRTY minutes. Roughly less than 45 minutes.
More than 10 minutes. Less than four hours! I can go on and on.
Don't push me. I'll do it. I'll go on and on way past your
comfort level. DON'T MAKE ME DO IT. Anyway what else is
going on. I wonder what kind of ancillary extenuating circumstances
Chucky will get into this week! Possibly as many as SOME. Most
likely as many as NONE. I haven't put the pieces together on what an
Ancillary Extenuating Circumstance is yet. That's too advanced for me!
Putting definitions together is way behind my Grade Level. Hmm what
grade would I be in if I advanced a grade a year. 28th grade. Is
that right? Sounds about right. The point is I'll be back in
a little bit.
That's What Really Counts
I guess. Hey time to write some more paragraphs. Got some
Vitamin Water Zeroe going on. Don't mean to brag, but I skipped
another day yesterday of having Vitamin Water Zeroes so I have THREE to last
me today and tomorrow. WOW. TWO IN ONE DAY. Or 1.5
both days. LIKE I SAID TWO IN ONE DAY. What else is going
on in the wide world of sports. Still going through Old Music I Like
primarily. I'm down to the FINAL TRACK of an album for next walk.
If I know what's good for me I'd pick out the next album NOW. Or
LATER. But BEFORE THE CUT OFF DATE of actually taking the walk.
Hmm. How about a CHILL album. Everyone knows how much I like
CHILL. This occasion is no different! Then again HOT albums
have something going for them too! Uh oh I'm in WORSE shape trying
to decide than I was 3 sentences ago. The good news is Somehow That
Made Up An Entire Half Of A Paragraph.
Wonderful. Also BIG NEWS I changed my phone
music EQ setting from SPOKEN WORD to NOTHING. Spoken
word is good because obviously lyrics are better but it's also just a
generic Treble Boost too. NOTHING is good though because presumably
that's how it was intended! Wow INTENTIONS? Great! I
wanna hear more about The Intentions of what I consume. Maybe
later. I don't feel like it right now. Wouldn't be able to
concentrate and focus! What else is going on. I think one flavor
of Vitamin Water is FOCUS. Well that's a good drink when you're
in class. Now you know From The Drink what you're supposed to do.
Also I crunched the numbers and I still think I am in 28th grade. For
a while I thought it was 27th but then I kept doing Head Math and I'm back
to 28th. Hmm this should have been the kind of thing we covered in
19th grade. What else is going on. Also I think I read
they're still including Universal Pre-K as part of the Build Ba Bill?
This may sound stupid but does that apply to EVERYONE? It says
universal. So if I WANTED I assume there's a spot for me in Nursery
School? At least for one or two semesters? You know that sort
Another paragraph down! What else is going
on. I'm gonna be honest I could benefit A LOT from nursery school.
At first I was imagining it Billy Madison style where I interact with 4 year
olds. Which would somewhat be useful to me, sure. But even better,
what about Adult Nursery School. Where it's 80% the same thing as
Child Nursery School but with Adults. And it's not a Sex Thing.
No one is dressing in diapers and/or getting off somehow. We're just
getting a refresher course on The Basics. Educational AND Social.
Anyway that's something to think about when hammering out the details.
What else is going on. HEY They Have Adult Nursery School it's
called... Hmm. There IS a joke here. There is a way I
can finish that sentence that is amusing and makes sense. My first
thought was Community College. But I'm not sure that's the 100%
perfect reference for the joke. I'm gonna have to think about this and get
back to you. I will neither think more about this or get back to
you. Oh well that's life.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! MAGIC THE
GATHERING Tournaments. That's a terrible reference not just for
this joke but for any joke. Oh well that's life, too! Both
what I said to end the last paragraph, whatever that was, Was Life and now
This New Thing Is Life. Ugh. Gonna take a nice bath soon.
Cleanse myself to an extent I'm comfortable with. That's how that
goes! Is it just me or is Jurassic Park Kind Of unrealistic.
I can point to SEVERAL parts of the plot that wouldn't actually happen in
the real world If This Kind Of Thing Was Going On. Why would Wayne
Knight be so greedy to sell Jurassic Park Secrets to rival company.
Wayne Knight is a decent guy all in all and I don't think he would
actually do that. That's one example of a problem I have in this
movie! You know that sort of thing. That's one way to write
the last 2/3rds of this paragraph. I regret nothing!
Last paragraph for now. Some music can be too
chill. Gotta watch out for that. Some music can be too HOT.
But that's more obvious. Everyone knows some music where they're
concerned about the heat. May not come to mind immediately that music
can be too cold. Ugh. What else is going on. What's
the sweet spot. 37 Degrees Celsius. What's that. Like
70 degrees Fahrenheit. Lemme LTURQ. 98.6! Which makes
sense. Because that's Body Temperature. So it makes sense that I
would come up with the number 37 Degrees Celsius because it IS a VERY
relevant number to us Humans. Also 98 Degrees: The Boy Band call
themselves 36.67 Degrees when touring in Europe. And Everywhere Else.
Just not America. Possibly Britain. Lemme LTURQ.
JUST AMERICA, CAYMAN ISLANDS AND LIBERIA. LIBERIA? I'm
gonna be honest I expected better from Liberia. I was even thinking in
my head before checking well definitely Liberia FOR SURE is Celsius.
The point is I'm gonna take a bath now. See ya in a bit.
Paragraphs Are Important Too
I GUESS. Took a bath! Went okay! Got some vitamin
water left. The real question is whether I'll have two today or two
tomorrow. I think two TODAY. Ancillary soda today is Orange and
tomorrow is Sprite. This is LEMON Vitamin Water. Makes sense to
have more Lemon Water on the day I don't have Lemon Soda. Okay
Great Now We're All Caught Up On Where My Life Is At. So I got
that going for me. Probably gonna have a 45 minute to an hour break
between Entry and Walk. I can accomplish so much! HOWEVER the
BEST thing I can accomplish is Saving The So Much For Later. Really
get myself going, priming myself for The Stuff I Have instead of BLOWING IT
right now when the entry is over. Also Chucky is one thing.
I'm assuming there's other things, too. At the very least Dropping
Jurassic Park I and going back to Tales From The Crypt as Generic Thing To
Put On TV. I'll have a lot of fun Ditching Jurassic Park. I
thinks it's so great! But it is So Not!
Wonderful. How many walks am I taking today.
Probably seven! Sounds okay to me. Trying to think about how
many walks to take For The Rest Of My Life after dieting to lose weight.
Hard thing to figure out! Gotta take in on a Season-By-Season basis.
One season I may have different life parameters than the last season!
Which would heavily influence how many walks I wanna take! And when!
You get the point. Probably. Not a hard point to get. You
may not get WHY you had to get the point. It's an easy point to
understand but it's a hard point to care about. So there's that.
Maybe just watch Chucky when entry is over. I feel like I'm Primed
Enough Already. Also I don't know what else to do. Save
that for later! I can not know what else to do for the rest of my life
for the rest of my life, only NOW can I watch episode II of That Chucky
Show as I believe it's stylized.
Cool! My dad keeps sneezing from downstairs.
Somebody tell him I Need To CONCENTRATE. What else is going on.
Hey haven't played some Rocksmith lately. I think I will today.
I don't particularly want to as of now but I DO want to do it
anyway even if I don't want to. Makes sense! An appropriate
amount of sense. I assume the boy band named themselves 98 degrees so
that we don't get confused and think they're zombies. Everyone knows
zombies are room temperature and not normal body temperature because they're
dead. That's the only reason I can think of for them to name
themselves that. Also... kinda makes ya think... ME THINK THE LADY
DOTH PROTEST TOO MUCH. THESE GUYS ARE PROBABLY ZOMBIES. Also
NSYNC? Me thinks the lady doth protest too much. These guys
are WAY OUT OF SYNC. Backstreet Boys? I THINK THESE BOYS
ARE FROM THE FRONT OF THE STREET AND I'D BET MY LIFE ON IT. What
else is going on.
I don't know if I'd bet my life on The
Backstreet Boys being from the front of the street. That's a little
too rich stakes for my blood. Well, unless I stand to win A LOT.
Otherwise I'd bet maybe six months of my life. Maybe a year.
What else is going on. Some :08 Baseball games going on today. I
don't know what they're thinking. I have yet to see one explanation
for their reasoning for setting up these game times. Also there's two
kinds of people in the world The kind of people who are like we
gotta get there for the national anthem! And the kind of people
who are like SHIT WE GOT HERE SO EARLY THAT WE GOTTA HEAR THE SHITTY
NATIONAL ANTHEM. Also A Bunch Of Other Kinds Of People.
But the point is who needs to hear the national anthem. I don't
care! When I was a kid I might have been in Camp One. Hey
I'm a kid I want the whole baseball game experience INCLUDING national
anthem. I grew up, though! We all gotta grow up some day!
Last paragraph of the day! Also I'm gonna be
honest still waiting for the day that I'll Grow Up. Any day
now! I can feel it! What else is going on. I feel like I
even wanted to show up so early that I could see batting practice.
Luckily my Dad or whoever was taking me never actually took us that
early. I'd pity them in the future that I made them do that in the
past. Now, with that never happening, we're all on even ground!
Huh. I wonder what other kinds of appointments I'm having today
that I forgot about. My guess is none. I'd bet my life on
it! Or at least 3-5 years of my life. The point is Hey The Entry
Is Almost Just About Over. Hey I still got tape over Cable Box Time.
Got TV and Cable Box in Early July. Went a period of 1-3 days in late
July without the tape. Otherwise it's been there and I've been getting
a lot out of it1 I don't constantly know the exact time! Just as
I planned! Good deal! Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.
October 19, 2021
We're All In This Together
Hello friends! Another day is upon us. Damn DAYS always being
UPON us. Wait if Days Are Good as they sometimes are then being
Upon Us is also good. You're really taking a stand assuming Day
Will Be Good. If nothing else I feel like I'm Here To Prove You
Wrong. I'm gonna make you sure today is crappy if it's the last thing
I do! Hopefully I'll do more things. For my sake!
Cool morning today! That's strike One. Had to wear winter
jacket and skull cap for first time since... possibly last year?
NAH I left the house once a month for Winter One of 2021. I wore this
Get-Up before! The point is DON'T LIKE IT. I like a bit
of a chilly but this is BEYOND Chilly and just plain CHILL. And I
Don't Play That Game. I KEPT ON LOSING. So I stopped completely!
I don't like color commentators and TV/Radio announcers calling homeruns in
baseball games. 80% of the time they set up their call like WILL IT
GO OUT? I DUNNO... GETTING CLOSER TO SEEING IF IT GOES OUT... and
I gotta imagine with their experience watching baseball all the time they
have a pretty good idea whether it'll be a homerun or not. QUIT
BEING OVERDRAMATIC JUST BE HONEST. That's my main advice to baseball
announcers. Just Be Yourself!
Sure. Boy oh boy do baseball announcers
have fun debating something was a check swing or not. Now they get to
make their deepest darkest opinions known to a wide audience and they ain't
letting this opportunity go without savoring it! Hmm.
Gonna shave next weekend. Shaving twice a month from now on! I
feel excited to Be A Real Boy. I mean A Real Man. I'm A Real Man
Boy. Something resembling that. I think we should be more aware
of the snacks and/or meals baseball commentators are eating. Gotta
imagine they binge during commercial breaks and/or when partner is talking.
I wanna HEAR them eating pizza. And be like MMM HMM THIS IS GOOD.
LET'S KEEP IT GOING. HERE COMES BABE RUTH BACK FROM THE DEAD TO
HE PLATE. Wait a second that might have been pycschedelic pizza.
That's not responsible to eat! Not on live TV at least!
Psychedelic? Sounds like MYSTIC Pizza to me! You know the
main Pizza-centric Film of the last half century. Which I think we
decided is about two rival pizza places and they each are trying to win some
sort of Competition? PROBABLY Pizza related?
HEY I thought of a, "Joke," yesterday after the entry.
It's not really good because It's Not Funny, I've Probably Said It Before,
and I Know In My Heart Of Hearts I shouldn't say it either way. But
here it is! I survived the Holocaust! It wasn't
particularly difficult because I Wasn't Then Or There but it's still
somewhat of an accomplishment. THANK YOU. I will take your
PRAISE E-MAIL as well as your COMPLAINING E-MAIL at mankindguy at gmail dot
com. Also if you decide not to e-mail me Which Is The Biggest
Insult Of All you can send that No E-mail to whatever e-mail you want!
I'll get the message either way! What else is going. On! I
went to the Holocaust Museum. I assume they have a gift shop selling
shirts saying I SURVIVED THE HOLOCAUST!... MUSEUM! However
that'd be pretty controversial! They'd probably have to stop selling
them THE NEXT DAY after they first went up for sale!
Fourth paragraph! Creeping up towards coffee
time! What's the MOST FUN exhibit or activity in Holocaust Museum.
There's gotta be SOME things that are fun. Right now the most fun
thing is I think they have a computer, which in 1997 was the height of
technology, that you can browse a database of Holocaust Dead and find your
relatives. And I feel like 1997, we all had personal computers and 90%
of us had the internet, but still A DATABASE? LEMME AT IT. I
WANNA PLAY WITH THE COMPUTER. Anyway. Ball pit. Gotta
imagine there was a ball pit SOMEWHERE in the museum. To
represent... parts... of the Holocaust. The ball pit part!
What else is going on? Also are there adult ball pits anywhere.
Gotta imagine SOMEWHERE. Business or Pleasure or Private. Adult
Swim Only! Ball Pit Swim! I envy them.
Great. Been doing way too many sit-ups and
push-ups. I do 16 each at a time. And it's enough times a day
that I can hardly even estimate it appropriately. 20-30 times off the
top of my head. POSSIBLY more. PROBABLY not less. The
point is I've been doing this for a solid two weeks and so far I'm Still
Alive So I Got That Going For Me. Possible I would have died somehow
if I didn't start doing this. I don't have all the details but hey
anything's possible am I right. Except for me dying from not doing
sit-ups. Pretty impossible. Oh well live and learn.
It's 16 for both Set Ups and Push Downs separately at a time because
I think 15 is a standard number to do at a time. And I just round off
estimating that I Fail Doing 1 Of Them each set. So I go with 16.
Pretty good Estimation Routine I got Going. Not unhappy with that
Estimation Adjustment at all.
I've talked about my push up/sit up routine before.
Probably relatively recently! Odds are VERY low I talked about it
before I started doing it. The point is It's Important so it shows up
again. Whose gonna stop me you? Hmm maybe you will.
Well the ball is in your court now! Anyway sure I got coffee going on
now. That happens every day. But I'm happy about it! It
makes me happy and whatnot. SO FAR I still got my bottle of coffeemate
going. This is the NINTH day its lasting me and I was aiming for 10
days. So it would confirm how much I've been estimating I drink it.
IT MAY EVEN MAKE IT TO ELEVEN DAYS. Wow The Number Eleven?
NEVER FORGET! It's supposed to be paired with some other number,
though. Either before or after it. CRAP I FORGOT.
Whatever. Also are we supposed to Never Forget 9/11 or Never Forget
The Holocaust. Make up your mind! I can't remember TWO
things. I GOT PLACES TO BE.
Seventh paragraph! Wonderful. I know time
travelers want to go back in time and kill Hitler but you could do even
better by going back in time and disguising yourself AS Hitler. Then
lead Germany Dummies into Doing Good. HEY YOU ALL LIKE ME RIGHT?
WELL GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO TODAY. PLANT SOME TREES.
That's the best thing I can think of doing. Planting a tree. Not
sure how that benefits me but the tree'll be happy at least when it
grows up. What else is going on. Unless they're Evil Trees.
Some trees are evil! Trees are like people. Some are good and
some are bad. And Nazises Planting Trees, gotta imagine those trees
are more likely to turn out to be Nazis than your random average tree!
Ugh. What else is going on. I like watching Horror Movies in
Spanish better than any other language. HEY I GET A LOT OF THESE
WORDS. I'M SOME SORT OF GENIUS. THIS FILM THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER
THAN ME BUT IT WAS WRONG. IT IS STILL SLIGHTLY BETTER THAN ME BUT NOT
AS MUCH AS IT THINKS.
Eighth paragraph! Amazing. Watched the
Complete 1991 Adams' Family. Pretty good! I was entertained.
Also the characters were all likeable. Except for WEDNESDAY.
Look, cute kid, great. But she's always putting her sibling(s?) at
risk by trying to kill them. BE CAREFUL. I know death is all fun
and games IN THEORY but you don't REALLY want your brother to die!
So that upsets me. What else is going on. Also the brother
Pugsly is kind of just seeming like a normal kid? Look he's
just a fat kid. He's not explicitly into Death or Morbidity.
Well Morbid OBESITY maybe! GOTTEM. I don't think
morbidity means what I think it means. Well what I THOUGHT it
means. Now I don't know what I think it is. I think it is
different than what I thought it is. Okay that covers that.
The point is this kid needs an attitude adjustment!
Ninth paragraph. I always assumed that person in
Adams Family who is Just Hair was a lady. Now I see that it's a fella!
EXCUSE ME it looked like Lady Hair To Me. Get off my back about
it. Cousin ITT. I always thought it was Cousin IT.
Shows how much I know! A LOT. I still know a lot. But
it shows I Don't Know This. This is one of literally THOUSANDS of
things to know in the world and, no, I do not know it. Not a huge mark
against me all things considered. What else is going on.
HMM baseball game at a reasonable time today. 5:08 PM. FIVE
OH EIGHT? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN. I just got
over there being :07 games because I figured it was :07.5 which could make
sense. :.08? THIS MAKES NO SENSE AND BOY OH BOY AM I ANGRY
OVER IT. The point is yeah I'll probably turn that game on for
a few minutes either at the beginning or the end. POSSIBLY between
the beginning and the end.
Last paragraph of the act! Amazing.
Are they just rounding :07.5 UP? They better not be that's all
I can say! Huh. Hmm. Wonder if weather has warmed
up in the last hour and 15 minutes such that I can wear Warm New Sweatshirt
Jacket. Let's GO TO THE VIDEO TAPE. By which I mean Google.
HEY it's a bit warmer. I could Chance It and wear New Warm
Sweatshirt Jacket. I think I'll do that. If nothing else I am a
man who takes chances. Positive chances! Community Chest is more
safe but I like Chance! This is common knowledge, right.
They did studies and determined you're better off with a Community Chest
than a Chance. I feel like we all know and accept this. And
if not I just provided Public Service! Also why would there be
negative things AT ALL in a community chest. Just to keep community
on it's toes. Oh okay I get it. Hey I'll be back in a little
Except For You
Hello friends. Dad is making a Gmail account. Very exciting!
They didn't have his first choice! They offered adding Numbers to the
end. Not sure what his next move is. I'll keep you updated on
this situation as it progresses. Well maybe once it's done
progressing. I probably won't have an update until it's over and
done with. Either way great just great. Here's something I've
written before but it just came up so I'll repeat myself-- farting is a
great way to scratch your asshole from the inside out! This comes
up pretty often in life. Good life lesson. Anyway what else
is going on. Taking a nice cleansing activity after this act right
here. In the meantime I have to write more things that I may or may
not have written before. Hmm. What if I wrote something new.
Well it can't hurt to dream I guess!
Wonderful. Why do people reach for the stars.
Do they actually think they can reach the stars? And then what
do they do if they can? Grab 'em and keep 'em for themselves? Kinda
insensitive to everyone else. Very selfish! Maybe they just
dream of having really long arms. The stars are more the means to
an end in this situation. They just want really long arms that they
CAN get the stars if they wanted to. Makes sense. Dad is
thinking of using first initial and last name as e-mail address. They
didn't have that without any fancy punctuations or numbers. Then he
considered entire first name and last name. I advise against that!
Gotta keep some things close to the vest. You don't want everyone
knowing Who You Are. Also he used to have a AOL name MATH1000
so I suggested using the number 1000 as a call back to that. Everyone
likes call backs! Except for a lot of people. Hmm sounds
I don't feel like I'm giving away too much
information with Math1000 aht AOL dhot com. I kinda DO feel like
I'm giving away too much information. But I also feel like that
feeling is WRONG. What else is going on. I feel like I've asked
my Dad why 1000 several times throughout my life and I don't recall
ever getting a good answer. He's playing this one pretty close to the
vest I guess. Why do people play things close to the vest. What
is it about their vest that they trust so much above other people.
Must be SOME VEST that's all I can say. What else is going on.
Are we supposed to relate to The Addams Family particularly the Raul Julia
and Angelica Houston. And if we are are we supposed to relatively self
conscious about it? I'm looking for answers! Also, at some point
will I realize there's two, "D's," in The Adams Family? YES! I
will! I realized it already In The Past. I just don't care!
Wonderful. Penultimate paragraph of
the act! I'm moving through this one like it was nothin'. Hey
it IS kind of nothin'. Well then everything's going perfectly I
guess! Other baseball game today is at 8:08. What's wrong
with people. Who the Hell is coming up with these :08 Start Times.
Is it one person or some sort of Baseball Time Committee at Major League
Baseball Headquarters. I demand answers! If not now then
eventually! And if not eventually then never! What else is going
on. I think they originally wanna start games at :00's but they just
keep putting it off. Hey we're supposed to set the time NOW if we
wanna reach the :00 deadline... hmm.. what else is going on... let's get
DISTRACTED for eight minutes... Uh Oh We Just Wasted Eight Minutes now we
REALLY better set up the time of the game immediately! That makes
sense. Lots of sense! So much sense that it almost makes sense!
Last paragraph of the act. Took a klonopin the
last 2 days. I have an insane amount of bonus klonpin though so I'm
good for now. Even if I take it every day! Which I may or may
not. On the one hand it'd be bad if I feel I have to take it. On
the other hand if I feel I have to take it I GET TO TAKE IT. Glass
is half full either way. How can the glass be half full either
way. You ask me ONCE is the glass half full or empty. I say
half full. Five minutes later You Ask Me AGAIN. SAME ANSWER.
Oh okay. Maybe 5 minutes later it's half empty. Some of the
water that was there originally may or may not have evaporated over those
several minutes. I'll have to think about this one. UNLESS
the glass FROM THE START was more than half full. In which case
I Don't Care Anymore. Ugh. Bath today. NO shower.
HEY I just remembered gotta start a new bar of soap. Fun! Who
doesn't love a full bar of soap. Some people. I pity
them. I'll be back soon!
Also It's Only Me
Hey. I'm all cleansed and everything! So I got that going for
me. Got a whole lotta day coming up after this set of 5 paragraphs.
Walking. TV. OTHER STUFF. Like the stuff between
walking and watching TV. Like putting on my jacket and whatnot.
Taking two pieces of gum to chew. That's fun! THEN START
CHEWING THE GUM. SO first I put on jacket. Then I take two
pieces of gum. Then I think and/or feel That's Fun! Then
start chewing gum. Yep great just great. Gonna get coffee
in a few sentences. See where my Dad is on this Creating An E-Mail
Address Internet Excursion To Remember. I heard him talking on the
phone before my bath. Over 50% chance it was Gmail Customer Support
and he was having trouble. That's My Dad for ya! Always
talking to customer support. He just can't get enough of it!
Got coffee. My Dad was indeed talking to
customer support. And he has indeed Given Up for the day. Not
on HIMSELF or on LIFE. Just on creating a G-mail account. He
doesn't give up LIFE that easily! Gonna take MORE THAN ONE negative
experience for that. Roughly five or six consecutive negative
experiences probably! What else is going on. Gonna have a nice
long break between entry and walk. I said that yesterday and it turned
out to be a lie. My Dad changed up when he wanted to take his walk and
as a result my best option was take a walk only minutes after the entry
ended. This time around? Probably gonna be an hour! An
hour and 15 minutes maybe! Then again we've PROOVEN that Anything Can
Happen so I can't say 100% what's going to happen re: Me Taking Walks.
Nor other things. But mainly This Thing.
Third paragraph of the Act! I can go with
Symmetry With Yesterday and watch the next Adams' Family movie this early
early afternoon. Or I can mix things up! That's the eternal
question ain't it. Same Early Early Afternoon as yesterday or mix
it up. No that is not the eternal question. I think we
can safely say that. If you make a list of the top 100,000 questions,
ranking them eternally, that not only isn't near the top of the list but it
doesn't make the list at all one bit! Anyway. Has anyone
made the pun that the Porn version of upcoming Super Hero Franchise The
Eternals will be called The Internals? Because I'd like to
make that pun HERE AND NOW in case it hasn't been made yet.
Internal means sex. Lots of sex involves someone's internals somehow.
That's my point of view! What was the porn version of Previous Super
Hero Franchise The Avengers. The.. uh.. The.. SEX...VENGERS.
Hmm lemme think about this for a moment.
Penultimate paragraph of the day! I don't believe
it. Am I supposed to be seeing films in the cinemas again? I
feel like I'm still not supposed to. Parents are triple vaxxed but
STILL. Oh well. Also I can't watch a movie for 2 hours
without a bathroom break. I'd need several bathroom breaks! I
feel like when I was still smoking I'd take 3 bathroom breaks and 2 smoke
breaks for each 90 minute movie. GOOD I'm gonna be honest this movie
wasn't really great anyway. I got more out of taking a smoke break
and/or bathroom break than I was getting out of this worthless movie!
No offense. What else is going on. Also for a while my main
time of drinking beer was before movie. Anyway. Been thinking
the last few nights hey I'd have a drink now all things being equal.
Oh well. All things AREN'T equal. I'm not happy about it
either but that's just the world we live in!
Last paragraph of the day. What else is going on.
Plan is to get a couple of beers or Single Shot Glass Bottles of Alcohol for
upcoming birthday. Celebrate it the only way I know how!-- Drinking
Alone. Hey sounds like a blast and a half. Also
presumably tell my parents about it. It would be less fun and special
knowing my parents are downstairs judging me. But it would also be
less fun and special fretting about keeping secrets from my parents.
Hmm. I can split the difference and tell them about one beer and not
the 2nd beer. That's a reasonable compromise to make. Sounds
about right. What else is going on. I enjoy this new
sweatshirt jacket! Comfortable material. Good Warmness for now
and upcoming weeks. Lookin' stylish. Comfortable hood that stays
on. And best of all It Was A Gift Of Love from my Mom. Wow
Gifts Of LOVE? From My PARENTAL UNITS? Sounds good to me! So
I got that going on for me! The point is I'll be back tomorrow.
October 18, 2021
I Came Up With This Title Yesterday
Hi friends. You can tell I wrote the title yesterday because it
doesn't refer to Colin Powell's death. It's not HIS death it
belongs to All Of Us! I guess so. Either way that's life I
guess. Got some strange sort of Face Headache. It's like a light
headache but centralized around the edges of my face! Fun. It's
slightly painful and/or uncomfortable but it's a new experience and if
nothing else I am a man who is a fan of new experiences. Also the
If Nothing Else part comes into play but There Is Plenty Else.
Anyway. Not sure if doing a Face/Off would help or would
hurt. A new face might be Problem Solved, but maybe the process of
Face/Offing would only exacerbate my uncomfortability! Luckily
Face/Off isn't a real option. Way out of my price range!
Also there's the burden of picking out a good face. I don't have the
time or money!
What else is going on. You don't need to do a
one-on-one trade in Face/Offing, right? Why would you. You get
one person's face, you get a third person's face, the third person gets some
2015th person's face... Why limit yourself to one-and-one trades!
Makes NO SENSE. Everything else about Face/Offs MAKES SENSE.
What else is going on. Hmm. Face/Off sounds fun but what I'd
really like to do one day is a Con Air. Not sure what that means.
It means a lot. That's why I said it! Makes sense.
I believe the sequel to Con Air was Con Ed and it was about an Energy
Company. Is that a universally known energy company? I feel like
it might have been localized in New York specifically AND it may be out of
business for the last 20 years. All I know is they talked about it on
New York One a lot I think. I just vaguely remember them always like
CON ED is in the news again, etc. Anyway better LTURQ.
HEY YEAH. Con Edison. For New York City and Westchester.
Still around, though! Good for them. I underestimated their
business plan for the 21st century! Anyway. Feels like
the Ghost Busters must have interacted with Con Edison a few times.
The time they went into the sewer. The time they were in trouble for
using too much energy or something. Always butting heads with Con Ed.
Jeez. Got coffee a-brewin! Wonderful.
Hmm what kind of power does Con Ed use. ELECTRIC. Yeah
but where do they get the electric power. I'm guessing an Unsafe Bad
For The Environment way! Because that's what everyone else does!
Why should they be any different. THEY'RE COVERING LOTS OF BASES.
Not just one. FOUR Wow four REALLY IS all the bases.
Never seen a baseball game with any more or any less. EVER! My
Dad used to tell me when he was very young and they'd play baseball people
would stop at Short Stop like it was a base because they didn't know better.
So basically they used five bases. Is this relevant to Con Ed's
business plan? What else is going on. I think you should
have to pick up bases as you cross them and stack 'em each time you pass a
new base. Just add a little bit extra to the game. I dunno.
I don't really think that. I'm not insane. More or
less I'm Not at least.
The Braves are doing the best in Last 2 Series Of
Baseball. I VERY EXPLICITLY said they were the team I was rooting for
the least. What are he odds!?! On the other hand I was VERY
EXPLICIT about liking their Team Name Abbreviation ATL the best of the
remaining Team Name Abbreviations. But I hardly get to see that at all
this time around. Once it's the playoffs it's all Atlanta This
and The Braves That. No one ever goes ATL IS UP TO THEIR
WINNING WAYS AGAIN... Except for me. I just Went That.
Kinda makes it all worth it more or less. Also if The Braves win
the world series they're gonna be cocky as hell come Spring Training.
It will intimidate the Mets! I'm worried the Mets will be intimidated
in spring training and not know how to get over it. That's how
Middling Baseball Teams react and adjust to being confronted by Winners,
right? Being intimidated and not knowing how to get over it.
Sounds about right.
Think I'm gonna start some Vitamin Water Zero-- The
Squeezed Effect-- right now. And then next paragraph start coffee.
Hmm Hmm I could Sqoozen this bottle. Once it's half full or so.
When it's completely full not much squeezing you can do. Little give
and take! All the more reason to drink it. Also because
I'm thirsty and like the taste. Now I have bonus reasons this is
great. Anyway. How could it have ZERO Sugar.
Everything has sugar. A little bit! I wouldn't be surprised if
the air we breath has SOME sugar in it. I'd be TAKEN ABACK. I'd
be FLABBERGASTED. I dunno about being Surprised though!
That's one bridge too far. Damn bridge being too far away.
Now I gotta find a
closer bridge! And I'm busy today! Forget what I'm doing.
But having To Just Live Consciously For Another 13 Hours sounds like a lotta
work to me.
Kinda weird that when we talk about head aches we
always talk about the top of your head. Look, there's a lot more to
your head than your scalp and up. Why doesn't anyone talk about CHIN
ACHES. Either because they don't happen OR because people have a
mental block about it. I feel like I don't remember having
chin aches but it's like dreams. They happen and then when you wake up
you can't remember them. I've had dozens of chin aches but I can't for
the life of me remember a single one! Also for YOUR lives.
Also, ONLY for your lives. Why risk The Life Of Me when I can get into
Using The Life Of You As Collateral. Huh. Anyway sixth
paragraph! Wonderful. Children of the corn is on Shutter:
The Screaming Service! Not a great movie but I always liked it because
it's my Namesake. On account of Korn being the first of two
syllables in my last name. ALSO it's about KIDS. I was a kid in
the first of two phases of my life. More or less, right?
Turning 33. 16.5 cut off age from kid to adult! WOW I'm
pretty much Still A Kid by that logic! Not sure that's accurate.
DON'T TAKE THIS FROM ME I WANNA BE A KID AGAIN.
Seventh paragraph. I guess! Been doing
way too much push ups and/or sit ups. The results speak for
themselves, though! It doesn't hurt or feel like I'm exerting
myself SLIGHTLY as much as last week doing it. Every week kids a
bit easier! WOW at this rate I Will Never Feel Pain Or Hardship
Again. Well that's good news. That's GREAT news.
Then again We Must Feel Pain. Otherwise how would we know we're in
trouble! They say that about those freaks who can't feel physical
pain. Oh well they'll just accidentally set themselves on fire and
burn to death because they can't even tell. Gotta imagine that
extents to mental or emotional pain. Hey that person just
accidentally fell in love with a girl who didn't love him back. YET HE
FEELS NOTHING. Now he's going to die or something somehow because of
lack of pain. I Don't Have All The Details!
Eighth paragraph. I imagine doing a Face/Off
would be a good sequel to Call Me By Your Name. And it's called Look
At Me With My Face. Wonderful. Never saw that movie
but I'm let's say 75% sure I'm getting the gist of it accurately from the
title. Such that my joke makes sense. Anyway what else is
going on. Two and a half paragraphs roughly left to go with Act I!
Wonderful. All I had to do was spend six paragraphs speculating about
Con Edison. Do they have a LEGIT connection to Thomas Edison?
Or is that just a clever PR move. Better LTURQ. I started
looking it up BUT I GOT TIRED. I do think Thomas Edison is from
New York, though. So they're halfway there is the point.
Thomas Edison is from the Midwest and then moved to New Jersey.
Well that's halfway there. New Jersey is New York. I don't feel
like that's too controversial a position!
It's just Dumb. No one takes it seriously. It
can't be controversial if Everyone Agrees It Means Nothing. Right?
Anyway ninth paragraph. I may be thinking of the Steam Ship Guy.
The guy who is friends with Canals. Who am I thinking of. Thomas
Edison made the Steam Engine. Is that what I'm thinking of?
Boy I Hope Not. The point is let's move on with your life.
EERIE CANAL. That might be a specific thing relevant to the guy I'm
thinking of. Let's LTURQ. I don't see anyone famous involved
with Erie Canal. I've heard of EERIE Canal. It's a canal
that's spooky. I've heard of EAR Canal. It's a canal that we
have 2 of in your head. ERIE Canal? That's nonsense! OH
wait I heard of Erie Canal it's hat thing I've been talking about.
Wow that's three canals I know! That's more than most people!
Last paragraph of the act! Wonderful. I
know Canal Street. I feel like I crossed it all the time!
Especially dorming at Lafayette in NYU. AT LEAST twice a day!
Anyway not a fan of canal street TOO BIG a dividing line. I like
streets great, I like significant dividing streets okay, but BIG
geographical dividing streets? Too much pressure going back and forth
from one side to the other. I don't need that kind of change in my
life over 2 times a day. I wanna stay on one side and live my life
that way! Anyway what else is going on. Gotta imagine that's
where A Canal Used To Be. Right? That would make a lot of
sense. Anyway Colin Powell fucked up getting America into Iraq War BUT
I don't like reading he had Coronavirus Shot and died anyway. I HAD
THAT SHOT. TWO OF 'EM EVEN. PROBABLY WILL GET A THIRD AT SOME
POINT OVER THE NEXT FEW MONTHS. I don't want to die! It'd have a
real net negative effect on my life! Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.
And by tomorrow I mean like 40, 45 minutes.
I'm Not Proud Of It Either
Hello friends. Got some Diet Dr Pepper going. I finished the
Vitamin Water Zeroe! That's how that goes. Have one a day!
Got a 6 pack for the week! Already went a single day without one so
basically I'm Golden for the rest of the week. Gonna have a nice big
break between Entry and Next Walk. I will accomplish so much. I
will lay in bed. I will have that moving picture box projecting image
and audio at me. PLUS I get to DECIDE what image/audio
combination I'm interested in for now! Off the top of my head maybe
The Simpsons. I'm a big fan of the audio! The images I can do
without. Feels like they can cause seizures pretty easily. I
can't believe I haven't had any yet! But the audio is full with
laugh-em-ups and whatnot so you can't argue with that! I'd like to see
you try! Unless if it's an animated version of you trying and the
animation is in Bright Ne-On Simpsons Colors! Then Here I Go Seizuring
What else is going on. How cam Seizuring not
be a word. The only way I can accept it not being a word is if it
is a word but I'm misspelling it. It not being a word at all IS
OFFENSIVE TO ME. Huh. Colin Powell might be Colin
Powell but he couldn't say POW WELL to the Covid Virus. You say
POW to someone it neutralizes it. Like a gun. Guns go POW.
So he tried to shoot the virus Well and failed. I feel very
strongly about this. I went into it not feeling strongly about it but
by the time I was done I felt strongly about it. What else is
going on. Yesterday I took eight walks. So much fun! I
can't express how much fun it is to Walk One Bonus Walk At Night. It's
like a special treat! Then if it becomes the routine who cares It'
Fine I Guess. But then if I do ANOTHER bonus one then we're
back in Special Treat Territory!
Hmm better cut my walks in half for a week. Down
to 3.5 walks a day! That way I can start doing Bonus Walks once a week
and build myself back up that way. Not sure that makes sense.
Wait yes I am. I'm sure that makes sense. Oh okay I didn't
see that turn of events. Is Colin Powell related to Colin Farrell?
Not biologically. I mean Thematically. Hmm. Gonna have
to look into that one. I did look into it! I actually typed
both their names into google. FINE I'LL ADMIT IT it wasn't so
much to see if they're related thematically as much as it was a way to
confirm I'm spelling both their two names right. THAT'S FOUR WORDS
OVERALL I COULD BE GETTING WRONG. Bu I'm not! I'm happy to
say I was right on all counts going into Asking The Internet. "Colin
Powell died after Complications of COVID-19." IT'S NOT COMPLICATED.
HE DIED FROM COVID. SIMPLE. STOP TRYING TO USE YOUR DOUBLESPEAK
TO CONFUSE PEOPLE. YEAH.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Still going
through Classic Music Albums I loved as a child. Also, I include being
a late teenager as a child. Nineteen through Eleventeen is still me
being a child. Either way roughly 4 albums down, roughly 1000 to
go. Well when I put it that way I'm gonna be done with this in
no time. Already WAY MORE than 1/250th there. I crunched
the numbers pretty well off the top of my head, what of it. What
else is going on. The good news is there's probably DOZENS of great
music albums I will love that I haven't heard yet at all. We're talking
possibly upwards of FORTY. Amazing. This paragraph is the
pits. I haven't said a single joke yet. Fourty. I
learnt something. I wrote Fourty instead of Forty at first.
But Fourty isn't a word and Forty is. I've learned that before.
Yes but clearly not well enough. I've got to learn something roughly
forty or Fourty times before it sinks in. Dependending on what it is.
Last paragraph before bath! That's great.
Nineteen through Eleventeen. Never Forget. That sort of
thing. I wasn't going to forget! I don't need to explicitly be
told to not forget the events of 9/11. I have a decent memory and this
is the sort of thing that's gonna stick relatively easily! It might
not come to mind every single day but if something prompts me to think about
it or something I won't be like wait what's that again? Don't
Worry I Got It Covered! Anyway what else is going on. Watch some
Shutter: The Screaming Service today. I feel like that'd be
entertaining enough and I got a fair amount of movies and Original
Mini-Series saved up to last me a while! So I got all that going for
me is the point. All what. Movies and TV to watch that
may last me roughly a week. Oh that sounds like a lot to
have going for oneself is the point. EXACTLY. I'll be
Oh Well What Can You Do
Wonderful. Gotta write some paragraphs. Take a nice break!
Coffee is involved at some point during the paragraphs. Got a lotta
fun stuff for today! My Dad is teaching tonight. I like it
because he likes it. I think he likes it! He'd like it better if
it was IRL (in real life) but I think he gets something out doing it OTC (On
The Computer). I feel like OTC is a real Initials Abbreviation for
something. Better LTURQ. WAIT off the top of my head OFF THE
CLOCK and/or ON THE CLOCK. Which may be used in Sports lingo!
Or in Time Keeping Lingo! Either way let's LTURQ. Over The
Counter trading. Which I believe is a Stock Office Financial Deal
thing. Not what I was thinking about! Let's see if there's any
back up definitions. That appears to be it. I think I'd
be better off without this Initial Abbreviation concept at all! I
don't TRUST it. I'm assuming that people are using OTC to SCREW the
working class. THOSE ASSHOLES.
Not 100% sure what class I'm in. I dunno
I'm gonna have to look into that one. What else is going on.
I can be in one class and still root for another class! It's called
being a Class Traitor and it's all the rage. Anyway I poured myself
some coffee so I got that going on. My Dad is peer pressuring me into
helping him figure out how to send photos from his computer to my Mom's
phone. I can think of several possible solutions and I can think of
several solutions that I don't know yet and it's not an emergency right now
so I Don't Care! If it was an emergency I'd bite the bullet and spend
10-20 minutes helping them figure it out. No emergency! Time for
me to move on with my life! I LIKE those odds. Started
watching The Adams Family movie. The one from my childhood. The
one that There's Two Of Them. I think I've seen bits and pieces of
these two films but maybe not ever in completion. Possibly the 2nd one
in completion. The point is great I can see myself being solidly
entertained by this selection of sound and sight projected at me.
Three paragraphs to go! Wonderful. I
think TV has really gotten the message that people like Horror and Halloween
themed TV and Movie because they've been leaning into playing Horror Movies
and TV all the time for Halloween since the end of July. I like it!
At least TV is getting something right! What else is going on.
Maybe one day every film or TV show will be Halloween Themed. I
hope not. I also like Goof-em-ups Comedy Films. I like it
when actors play fictionalized versions of themselves. It's funny AND
it makes ya think. Sure great what else is going on.
Listening for some sort of Amazon delivery now. Should arrive within
the next couple of hours. For some reason Only I can accept boxes
which are delivered. It may have started as a Pandemic Quarantine
Precaution but I kinda feel like at this point we shouldn't be worried
because my parents are triple vaccinated. I also feel it MAY have
started before Pandemic Quarantine even started. Only I can
properly take a box from in front of the front door and move it behind the
Penultimate paragraph! Not a Weight Of Box thing.
97% of these box deliveries are light enough my parents should be able to
comfortably lift it. Box deliveries. Hmm. I've been
assuming that these boxes have things in them but what do I really know.
Maybe my parents are just ordering boxes! I feel like my entire
life has been a lie. I've always been told either explicitly or
implicitly that There's Things Inside Boxes but it turns out Boxes Are
Usually Just Empty. Life lesson. Makes sense to me.
Also the corollary life lesson is Whether The Box Serves A Purpose Or
Not, Only I Can Accept It. What else is going on.
Watching the first 5 minutes of The Addams Family (1991) my first thought is
what was the discussion on the appearance of THING (The Disembodied Hand
that is a person). Was there any thought to making it bloody
and/or gross? My second thought was-- which just came to me now--
was it from 1991 like I'm guessing And I'm A Genius or am I a little bit
off. 1991. GENIUS.
Last paragraph of the day! Let's make it a
good 'un. I think I always thought Raul Julia was 10 or 20 years older
than he really was because I know he died right around these Adam Family
Films and The Street Fighter Film. So I just assumed well he's dead
must have died of relative old age. He was in the prime of his
life! Doesn't seem fair. I'm assuming he died from an
Uppercut from Colonel Guile/Jean-Claude Van Damme then. He's
famous for his powerful uppercuts! What else is going on.
Gonna take a NICE break between Entry and Walk. We're talking an hour
at least. Probably more like an hour and 15 minutes! WOW 15
minutes? Now we're talking! Especially when you consider it
as an addendum to The Hour That's Happening Already Anyway! What else
is going on. Nice The Rest Of The Day in store for me. Gotta be
excited about something. No you don't. Yeah but I'd
encourage it anyway. Great. I'll be back tomorrow.
October 17, 2021
Nobody Ever Listens To Me
Hello friends. Got some Vitamin Water Zero: The Squeezed going on
right now. I felt like drinking a non-carbonated beverage! Or at
the very least an un-carbonated beverage. I'll drink a beverage that
was carbonated that is no long carbonated! Hmm is that accomplished
by just Leaving It Out For A While. If something loses its bubbles
completely is it no longer carbonated? Also is our air Carbonated and
that's what Global Warming is? Gotta imagine Carbonated means +
Carbon. You don't have to imagine it I'll imagine it for ya.
Wait carbon is that Global Warming Gas. Or is it the building block of
Life. It can't be both! Better LTURQ. Oh Right
Carbon DIOXIDE. Special Carbon causes Global Warming. What kind
of Special Carbon is the building block of Life. Google CARBON
BUILDING BLOCK OF LIFE. Hey this is fun I got as far as Carbon
Bui and immediately it prompted me to search Carbon Building Block Of
Life. Google knows the score! Anyway yes Carbon is Universal
Building Block Of Life. So GOOD because Life Is a Plus. BAD
because Global Warming is The Worst.
Anyway. Where's Mr. Freeze when you need
him. I know he was originally a bad guy but man oh man can Mr.
Freeze potentially help us out re: The Fight Against Climate Change.
Hmm fighting climate change is easy. Just use Freeze Rays All
The Time 24/7 across the globe. Hire 6000 Francisco Lindors to carry
Freeze Rays and go across the country (AND THEN THE WORLD) freezing things!
That's a Build Back Better I imagine everyone would be on board with.
They have NO CHOICE. They got Francisco Lindors holding FREEZE RAYS to
their head. Literally! I dunno about that. What else
is going on. We can't be wasting Freeze Blasts on Congresspeople and
Senators. That's one Blast Of Freezing that goes unused on the
environment! Am I the first person ever to say, "Congresspeople?"
I feel like YES I Am. Where's my parade. I hope I
never get a parade. It's too much! A parade just for me is
overdoing it. Now you know.
What else is going on. I'll share a
parade, sure. Me and The Lindor Clones can share a parade. 6001 people
to celebrate that's reasonable. The point is maybe You Don't Want A
Parade Celebrating Less People Than Are In And/or Watching The Parade.
Hmm sounds like a good rule of thumb. Why Thumbs Be Having
Rules?!? Let's Talk About It! We just did. Oh right
that was fun. BOTH TEAMS I was rooting against in Major League
Baseball won yesterday. What are the odds of that?!? Roughly
one in four. Oh that sounds reasonable. Moving on! Was
there ever anyone who was like we're gonna elect a WOMAN to congress?!?
What's Next A DOG?!! My guess is YES it's possible someone
somewhere held a rally in the 19th or early 20th century to make that point.
I don't like it! But it's an important part of history we can't
whitewash. Also the term whitewash is an important part of
history we presumably can't whitewash but I'm not sure exactly what
whitewash means so I can't say for certain at this time.
I'd elect a dog to congress. A GOOD dog at least.
Obviously we're considering this on a dog-by-dog basis. Wonderful.
The point is if we ARE nominating animals to congress gotta imagine Dog is
at the top of the list. They're part of the family already! Then
again maybe you wanna go with Highest Intelligence Animal. In which
case we can choose between Chimps, dolphins, and maybe some sort of
parrot. Parrots aren't smart really but they can
give speeches. Which is a valuable set of traits for a congressanimal
I feel. Parrots can run for president. Just look at Ross Parrot.
You don't even NEED to look at him. Just consider him appropriately
while reading and COGNATIZING that sentence. Mission accomplished!
I watched Black Widow yesterday. It was an okay movie! I
liked the part where hmm I dunno but I liked parts of it believe you me.
Don't believe you me. You ain't me! I feel very strongly about
Coffee after this paragraph. Probably
talked about Francisco Lindors being Mr. Freezes before. It rings some
sort of bell. One can only desperately hope the bell it rings is oh
right I talked about it 10 minutes ago. And that's the extent of
the bell! I dunno, I guess there's no way of knowing. I can
search, "Francisco Lindors," every month going back to the start of the
year. Yeah but I can also NOT do that and that seems like
the way to go as of now. What else is going on. Got some good
stuff in store for today. Watching TV Activities.
Walking/Listening To Music Activities. Trying to get back into
listening to classic artists and albums from my childhood. Been a
pretty long time that I spent on listening to New New Music and New Old But
New To Me Music and My Own Music Which Is Old But New To Me Now And Again
Music almost exclusively. Now I realize I can listen to my favorite
albums on walks and it's a real game changer!
How come whenever there's a new wrinkle in a game it's a game
changer. LOOK you're playing the same game as before. EXACTLY
the same game. It's just that now there's a new element or change that
you have to consider. Where would we be if In Games every time
something happens it starts a new game. Games would never get
completed! Oh right I can have coffee now. I had a dream
they made a Back To The Future IV and I was watching it and/or in it as an
actor and/or participating in it like it was real life. And it was a
kinda shitty movie to watch/be in/experience like it was real! And
then apparently Christopher Lloyd DIED sometime in the making of it so they
have to cut things up a bit to accommodate him not finishing all his scenes.
Which made it even worse! Oh well that's life I guess.
The MAIN part of life! Anyway. LOOK we can either have 6000
Francisco Lindors with Freeze Rays OR we can develop a time traveling
Delorean. One or the other! Gotta decide soon which to pick!
Hmm we can use the money on time travel and then time
travel back in time to take back the money that we would spend on time
travel and put it in the Lindors Bank Account. So we ultimately get to
do both! That checks out completely that would work. What
else is gone. I think now I know The Hyper Link where I can just watch
This Synagogues Shabbat Service every Saturday for free. HOLY MOLY.
No pun intended! I get the HOLY part of the pun but not so much the
Moley. Of course not Moley isn't a word or concept. It's
just a nonsense sound! Impossible to get anything to do with it!
Seventh paragraph. They had some guy playing acoustic guitar on the
Synagogue Show. I don't think it was the Rabbi. Some sort of
Assistant Rabbi. Or a Vice Rabbi, I dunno what they're called.
Either way amazing.
What else is going on. Gotta imagine Old
Serious Jews aren't fans of this frivolous nonsense. The Rabbi &
Friends In Charge are desperate for the Youth Target Audience and even the
youths don't care about this. But REAL religious people must be like
I RISKED ANGERING GOD BY LEAVING THE HOUSE FOR THIS? I'd have been
better off staying in bed. This is BULLSHIT. That's how I
would feel if I was a Real Religious People. Wait a second that's
how I'd feel if I was ANYONE. I'd Have Been Better Off Staying In
Bed Too Even If I Was Me! What else is going on. Midway through
eighth paragraph. You'd think that'd mean I only have 1.5 paragraphs
left. Wrong. 2.5! I dunno hopefully you wouldn't think
1.5 and WOULD think 2.5. Because it's actually pretty simple math.
Maybe I'm giving you too much Negative Credit re: How Stupid you may or may
not be. Hmm I've given someone a lot to think about presumably or
Penultimate paragraph! Also they're risking
Angering God because the main premise of Shabbat is You Can't Do Any Work.
And just GOING to Synagogue is work! Walking. Probably DRIVING.
Look obviously they make a point of saying fine if it's gettin' ya to
Temple FINE but BE CAREFUL. But either way I forget exactly what
point I was trying to make. What else is going on. I was
originally aiming for Diet Relaxation at the start of December (and or RIGHT
AFTER THE END OF NOVEMBER). But I probably could start even sooner!
But it wouldn't align cleanly with a Month-by-Month Calendar Measurement so
WHY BOTHER. Hmm. Already more than halfway through
October. Getting close to flipping the page of Patriotism Calendar.
OH NO I'm running out of calendar. ANY Calendar. Well it was
fun while it lasted I guess. Yep.
Last paragraph for now! I don't believe it.
Sure I do. Interesting counter-point. Maybe my best option
is starting Game Change In Diet at the end of October/beginning of November!
I could theoretically do that responsibly but it just feels too soon to me!
Wonderful. This is good stuff. Maybe a fortnight into
November. Shakespeare would be okay with that as a standard
measurement of time. And I try to live my life by standards
Shakespeare would OK. If you know a better way to live your life
I'd like to hear it. Well not right now. Send me an e-mail
or something that I can read at my own pace. And if I don't get back
to you for weeks or months that's just the price of doing business.
Huh. I was just trying to think hmm what are some weird things
Mr. Freeze said in Batman & Robin. First thing that immediately
came to mind was What Killed The Dinosaurs? THE ICE AGE!!!
Which is an interesting thing to say because wait a second that's not
true at all. That's a COMPLETE disregard for Actual History.
Anyway I'm gonna take a walk be back soon.
That Sums That Up
Hello friends. Time to write some paragraphs. Then I get to take
a Nice Cleansing Experience To Remember! What else is going on.
Any good Films I can watch today. I'm a big Cinema Fan I like all the
movies. Horror movies. Non-horror movies. Horror TV shows.
All the things. Baseball game today at a reasonable time! I've
lost interest in baseball. As normal people get gradually more into
and into baseball as playoffs narrow down I go the other direction!
YEAH I SAW THIS IN THE LAST SERIES WHAT ELSE YA GOT. I'd be
interested in some Spring Training Games. You tell me you're canceling
the rest of the playoffs but starting Spring Training I'd be excited about
that! Well I guess that's not too crazy. Everyone plays in
Spring Training. Including the team, The Metropolitans, that I'm most
invested in. I dunno even if it was 29 teams in Spring Training,
with The Mets on the outside looking in, I'd STILL be rooting for Sprang
Training. Get off my back about it is the point!
Huh. I just like picturing Economy Sized And
Decorated Baseball Fields. Get some teams working out on a nice Little
League Baseball Field. And it's Spring. Hmm maybe this is a
weather thing. I'd rather it be March and October. I
dunno March IS the October of The Summer. I mean.. uh... NO.
They're opposites. March is the After Winter equivalent of October
being the Before Winter equivalent. Or reverse that and say it's
around Summer. I THINK I'VE MADE MY POINT CLEARLY. No I
don't. I've never been more sure of anything in my life! That I
haven't made my point clearly at all! Oh well that's life I guess.
Now that I think about it it was a pretty dumb point in the first place.
Oh well THAT'S life I guess. I'm amending what I Say Life Is.
Updating it one might say! Anyway. Let me put it this way.
Braves are facing the Dodgers in playoffs. If they were facing each
other as the inaugural Spring Training Game of the Spring Training Season
I'd be more interested in watching that. Get Off My Back About It
Is The Point!
Wonderful. I enjoyed a shower yesterday.
I'm gonna enjoy a bath today! It's calling mixing things up and it's
what life is all about. Especially for Mixologists. Which is
either some sort of fancy bartender, some sort of dumb D.J., and/or the
people in charge Of Soda Company's R & D. Hmm third thing wasn't so
different than the first thing. Oh well that's life I guess!
I feel like there was a guy named Tom Mix. And he was either an Old
Timey Actor or an Old Timey Baseball Player. Leaning towards Actor.
Because I Know For Sure That's The Case. They mentioned him at the end
of Tombstone: The Western. And I pay attention to The End Of
Things. Except for baseball. Then I pay attention to the
beginning of things. But for Films I pay attention to the end!
What else is going on. Got some carbonated beverages going on for Act
II. About halfway through my third glass of carbonated beverage this
act. WHOW A GLASS A PHARAGRAPH. Yep that math seems to
check out more or less. On average. Decent Estimation at least.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
I saw Diet Coke was trending on Twitter. Haven't they heard
The Good News About Coke Zero?!?! Maybe they have. That's
what's trending. A bunch of people saying Hey I thought Die Coke
was good BUT that was before I tried Coke Zero. That sort of
thing. I'd click the Hyperlink which shows me what people are saying
about it but I really don't care at all. Their business! Not
mine! Also I don't wanna read about Die Coke at all anyway. Who
needs it? Not me! HMM baseball game time today is just a
bit unreasonable. Starts at 7:37.5 PM. Baseball games are three
hours. I'm in bed and turning off TV and Going To Sleep at around
10:20, 10:30. Sorry Baseball looks like you will be going
unwatched. By me at least. That's Gotta Smart. I don't
think it's fair that when the Braves beat the Dodgers last night, not only
did the Braves get the win, but the Dodgers got the loss! That sounds
like you're accidentally repeating yourself to make things even worse for
the losing team. You might wanna look into that math I think you're
getting it wrong!
Last paragraph of the act! Wonderful. What
else is going on. Oh No year is ending soon. What do I got in
store for the next year. Let's start off small. What do I have
in store for The Winter. THAT'S NOT SMALL THAT'S OVER 2 AND A HALF
MONTHS. Then let's start with January. OKAY THAT'S
SIGNIFICANTLY SMALL ENOUGH I GUESS. YOU'RE PUSHING IT BUT IT'S CLOSE
ENOUGH TO BEING SMALL ENOUGH. Anyway hmm. Gotta do
something. The good news is I have 2 and a half months to Think About
It. Gotta imagine at some point something will occur to me!
And I'd be like how the Hell did I miss that. Of COURSE I should do
that in January and/or the complete amount of the over 2.5 months left of
winter in Beginning Of 2022. Wonderful. If you make posts
which combine Trending Topics on twitter into a single tweet I assume you go
straight to the front of the line and are featured when people click the
links. No matter how few followers you have! Hmm sounds like good
strategy. Either way I'm gonna take a bath now. Great!
WAIT one more thing. I happened to look up weather 11364 just
out of interest and I was looking at the hourly forecast and it had a bunch
of Partly Sunny and then it was interrupted by an hour of Partly
Cloudy. WHAT THE HELL. IT'S THE SAME THING.
I'd, "Delve," into that a bit more but I got Cleansing Activities to do!
Be back soon.
I Have A Good Feeling About This
Hey! What's going on. Got some nice Coke Zero going on.
Gotta be honest, I've gotten Coke Zero the last 2 or 3 Super
Market Deliveries and I'm thinking ya know what I haven't had in a while?
DIET PEPSI. In the sense that I'd like that. So I got
that going for me is the point. When kids have fun at places where you
pour your own soda into Cups and mix sodas does anyone ever mix pepsi and
coke? My guess? NO NEVER. VERY RARE YOU COULD GET BOTH
IN THE SAME SODA DISPENSER. They either have Pepsi Products or
Coke Products! I feel I HAVE seen Rows Of Soda Product Faucets where
they had Pepsi and Coke. It rings a bell. Once in a blue
moon. But for the most part that's gonna be an impossibility.
Here's something that's common-- probably even more common than mixing
flavors-- mixing Diet and Regular Something. I think it's dumb
but who am I to judge. Some guy with judging powers. Oh
Right that checks out.
Wonderful. Got coffee. Re-upped with soda.
Life is going fine. Hmm I have pretty low standards for Having A
Fine Life. Alright! That's good news. Gonna take a
walk after the entry. No break! I got the same amount of time I
often have for a break but I just feel like taking a walk anyway! I
got MUSIC to listen to. Hey I know these songs. Now I
Know Them Yet Again! Fine Life! I'm gonna be honest, Michael
J Fox and/or Michael J Fox's Character was alive for the duration of Back To
The Future IV but he wasn't exactly on his, "A," Game either. Which is
okay. If he wants to be on his, "C," game that's his choice!
Let's be honest it was more of a D+ game. Why am I reluctant to be
honest about it. It Was A Dream I Had. It doesn't reflect poorly
on the real Michael J Fox at all. Well maybe A LITTLE BIT.
But Not MUCH.
Third paragraph of the Act III! Wonderful.
Possible I change up diet halfway through November. Makes sense
not-arbitrarily-fitting-it-into-patriotism-months-wise. So I got that
going for me. I'm doing an experiment to see how much Coffee Mate: The
Fat Free Coffee Creamer I use. The experiment was noting when I
started the most recent Bottle of it and taking note of when I finish it.
Very complicated experiment! Only the best at science (me) could
figure this out and do a compete Lab Report on it. What's the
experiment. What's my hypothesis. What's the materials.
What's the process. ETC. So many standard steps in lab
report! I know it because I had to take Two Lab Classes TWICE!
The first time around I didn't finish my labs! Anyway. I had
to take 2 classes twice I think. I know I had to do summer school for
one. Chemistry. Then I feel I had to repeat Physics but that was
during regular Fall or Spring Semester. WOW I must be great at
science now. Well I just accurately parroted the first half dozen
steps of your standard lab report. So I guess I absorbed Something.
What else is going on. My favorite step is
Hypothesis. Now it's time for My Creative Self To Shine! I
CAN HYPOTHESIZE ANYTHING I WANT. ...Better just hypothesize accurately
what I know logically will happen. This way I look like a real genius
when it comes true. Hey this is the penultimate paragraph of the
entry! Wonderful. When I retook Chemistry in the summer it was
both Chemistry I and Chemistry II combined. With each one normally
being its own semester. I think when I re-took physics I was able to
just take Physics II for one semester. THIS IS GOOD STUFF lets keep
it going. I dunno. Worst part about Labs was having a
partner. Everyone partners off with their friend. I have no
friend! Then someone gets stuck with me. Which is super bad
because I'm weird AND I'm bad at labs and don't know what to do.
Doubly bad for THEM, Double bad for ME. No one is winning in this
scenario! Maybe the teacher! He or She gets off on this kind of
Last paragraph of the day. I guess. I
think I also took a Spanish Class that was beneath me but I don't think it
was a repetition of a class. I was just taking it with sophomores when
I was a junior. Somehow. Not sure how that worked out.
The point is I Forget. I'm almost done with the entry. That
is A point. I guess. I have the whole day ahead of me!
Except for the over 50% of the day that already happened. And the last
3/24ths of the day where I'm asleep. But basically I have 40% or so of
the day ahead of me! WOW that rounds up to 50%. Which
rounds up to Everything! Amazing. Gotta get blood work done on
Thursday. More like I GET to have blood work done. I'm
gonna insist they take MORE blood. Just keep taking blood until I pass
out. Hmm that sounds Kind Of Fun I guess. Anyway I'll be
October 16, 2021
Hey You're Alright
Hello friends. Woke up a little late today. Also had to do a
Surprise Chore and bring in laundry to laundromat. I GOTTA CARRY A
BAG INTO A CAR? AND THEN SLIGHTLY LATER TAKE THE BAG BACK OUT OF THE
CAR? AND THEN DO IT BACKWARDS AGAIN A FEW HOURS LATER??? I
don't remember signing up for this life. Doesn't seem fair it should
be sprung on me at the last minute! Hmm. I HOPE this isn't
the last minute. Even if it's relatively speaking and A Week and
not A Minute. Then again I can accomplish a lot of Buckets in
the last week. Off the top of my head eat pizza. I
could do that even if I wasn't dying. I probably wouldn't though,
got stuff in the fridge from Super Market I should eat first.
But if I was dying screw that I'm getting pizza! So that's one
way to Live Your Death. My Mom was nagging me to help her set up
Second Cousin's Bar Mitzvah Live Stream. I did it! You know how?
I opened the e-mail. I CLICKED the hyperlink. THE END.
You thought I was angry about the laundry? I'm ANGRY MORE about having
to click a hyperlink for my Mom. Okay time to cool down.
You'd think so wouldn't you.
Anyway. Saturday Time. Besides
Condensed Upcoming Few Hours Schedule which is tight, and then Laundromat In
Reverse, today should be a fine day! I'm awake now and all the bad
stuff is behind me! Except for those things I just said that are
Before Me! I don't wanna see my second cousin turn 13.
He's probably significantly taller than me by now. I got enough
problems than having my little cousins be much taller than me. Anyway.
On the plus side Laundromat Lady recognizes me and this is only my third
time there. Even said did you get a haircut? Yes!
Yes I did! All in all this person is more or less my best friend
outside my immediate family. It's not GOOD that's the case but it is
FACTUAL. Hmm shouldn't my Various Doctors be closer friends?
Nope! They're Work Friends! Laundromat Lady is my Friend Friend.
Hmm. That seems to imply that Me Going To Doctors is My Job.
More or less! Definitely Mental Health Doctors! If I didn't go
to them I probably wouldn't get Social Security from the government.
So without them I don't get paid. WORK FRIENDS.
Anyway. What else is going on. I feel
my Endocrinologist is also a Work Friend too. Prove me wrong! I
have big news. The Lemon Flavored Vitamin Water Zero isn't called
ENERGY it's called SQUEEZED. Where did I get Energy
from. What's Energy. Looks like Energy might be a NON ZERO
flavor. That can't be right either. I remember Drinking
Energy. I can't imagine myself ever drinking Caloried Vitamin Water.
Oh well that's life. Anyway it's a good thing it wasn't Energy
because I drank it at night at my nightstand while going to sleep. I
don't want energy then! That's the last thing I want! I want
SQUEEZING. Hmm I wouldn't mind some Squeezing In Bed if you know
what I mean. Sex. Sex involving Squeezing! Hmm
sounds good let's do that tonight. Hmm. What else is going
on. Creeping up to Coffee Time!
I think Vitamin Water Flavor Names really lean into
being Uppers. Energy Rise Refresh etc. I want some
flavors that will SLOW YA DOWN A BIT. We got plenty flavors to get us
going. We need a few to get us going IN REVERSE. Sounds fair.
What else is going on. Maybe the XXX flavor is a nighttime flavor.
Sure. Hmm. Always imagined they were leaning into Sounds Like
Sex but maybe they're leaning into sounds like whiskey jugs during
the 19th century. In which case Sign Me Up! What else.
I've mixed Vitamin Water and Alcohol probably 5-10 times in my life! I
can definitely remember doing it at some point. Good sense memory or
something. It's delicious because of Water and it's healthy because
of alcohol. Sounds about right! Not sure I ever had a
workfriend. I had Work for 1 or 1 and a half years! I had 1
friend but we were friends before work job started so he's not a work
friend. I had 1 or 2 other people I talked to but I don't think they
liked me much! Great. Having Work IN AND OF ITSELF is
your friend. Great.
I took a gander at Bar Mitzvah Swearing In.
It was okay because it was a Wide Shot and not an up-close shot of Cousin.
So they weren't rubbing it in that he's taller than me. Fair
enough. LOOK some beverages I've had non-diet versions of.
But by the time Vitamin Waters came around (first year or college or so?
For ME at least?) I was 100% diet Beverages. For the most part!
So NOT 100% you're saying. No. I'm sticking with 100%.
I drank 100% diet beverages FOR THE MOST PART. What's so hard about
that to understand and/or accept? Anyway. Watched Tombstone
yesterday. It's not quite Deadwood but it's also not quite Some Dumb
Western I Don't Like At All. My favorite part about Westerns is those
nice looking cigar-cigarettes Western People smoke sometimes. That
just looks appealing! I'd smoke those if they were marijuana and not
tobacco. Also it has to be LIGHT marijuana. DIET marijuana per
say. Hey here comes coffee.
I think they're wearing masks on Synagogue Live Feed.
WHAT WOULD GOD SAY. I dunno! Maybe he'd be Pro-Mask, maybe
he'd be Con-Mask. That depends on a congregation-by-congregation
determination. MY God would be PRO MASK. That's how I
feel. On account of wanting people to live, etc. Makes sense.
Hmm. Covid Mask pun with The Mask the movie. Ya put on your
covid mask and then go SOMEBODY STOP ME!!! That's the line
everyone knows The Mask says, right? SOMEBODY STOP ME.
That's his famous quote. I haven't seen the Mask in 20 years. I
feel like it would be horrifying now. I just looked at a still image
and I'm gonna have trouble falling asleep tonight! Maybe because I'm
drinking too much Vitamin Water with Pop. Hmm. I just
watched 10 seconds of a mini-scene of Jim Carrey As The Mask getting ready
for a date in a Hyper And Funny way. Part of it is him shaving
himself. He's wearing a mask. What, is he gonna be growing
facial hair on top of the mask? THIS MAKES NO SENSE. Also
the other ways to get ready make sense. Brushing his teeth!
Makes sense! Blowdrying his hair? Makes sense! HE
DOESN'T NEED TO SHAVE HIMSELF OVER HIS MASK.
Now I'm angry again! I was getting over me
being frustrated for many reasons to start the day. Now I'm back being
upset! Oh well that's life. Then again if anyone can grow
facial hair on top of a mask it's The Mask. He can do a lot of things
that most people can't do. I can see him growing a beard in a matter
of SECONDS on top of his mask. Ugh. I feel like Tombstone
is some sort of Pizza reference. Is that a kind of pizza? It may
be a Chain of Pizza or a Chain of Frozen Pizza. Or maybe it's a way to
cook pizza. Either way Tombstone is a word sometimes associated with
pizza! Wow now I'm on board. I'd watch a film about
pizza. Hmm. I probably HAVE watched films about pizza. Off
the top of my head I'm not sure what they were called though. I'm
imagining a movie where there's rival Pizzas or something. That's
all I got.
Eighth paragraph! I got that going for me is
the point. I heard some audio from the next room of Cousin reading
Hebrew. Or RECITING HEBREW FROM MEMORY. Either way sounds
kinda dumb. He may be taller than me at this point but he's gotta
dumb Early Teenager Voice. So basically I'm still better than him
which is a relief. I got 20 years on him! I SHOULD be better
than him and I shouldn't feel bad about feeling that way! Wait a
second he was born when I was 20? I HAD HIM WHEN I WAS 20?
THAT'S VERY EARLY. Wait a second I didn't have him.
Well I kinda did. It takes a village! Ugh. Hey what
else is going on. I'd live in a village. In a heartbeat!
You set me up with a village right now I'll live there IMMEDIATELY.
Hmm there's a Queens Village. That's no village. That's a
city-suburb Neighborhood. HEAVY on the city and LIGHT on the suburb
most likely. Either way That's No Village! Huh.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! So I got
that going for me. Presumably. There's a The Village: The Not So
Great M Night Shaymalan Film. Presumably. I've never seen
it so I can't say for certain if it was Not So Great. Honestly, I
can't even say for certain whether there's a Film in the first place!
Pretty much operating on what I've heard from other people! Either way
I know the ending so that's halfway there to being able to appreciate the
film or not. YEAH. Damnit SFS! Now you know There
Is An Ending. You coulda guessed that. It's not a constant
Live Stream Film that never stops. Not like his Bar Mitzvah.
This is live stream and we're watching it life. For all we know this
Never Ends! The point is I can't wait to see the surprise twist
ending to this Bar Mitzvah. Well I can wait. Also I'm not
even watching it! I'll have to ask my Mom later how it ended.
Last paragraph of the act! Then I get to take
some sort of Great Walk. The point is Pizza is a Plot Point is many a
Film. But I can't think of a film ABOUT pizza. Oh Right
The Pizza Film. That's what it called. That Pizza Film.
Wonderful. Well I'm not proud of it but I'm gonna take the plunge and
google Films About Pizza. Here we go! Mystic Pizza.
I never saw that! Also I don't think it's about pizza.
Pizza is more The Setting. Either way probably as close as we're
gonna get. What else is going on. Seemed like there was a
nice baseball game last night. I envy those who watched it.
No I don't. I PITY them. They could have been watching The
Simpsons for the first 2/3rds like I was and then been asleep for the last
1/3rd like I was. I was VERY happy with how that turned out and I
think they'd have preferred it too! OH WELL. Too late to
go back now! But it's NOT too late to use that knowledge to plan
appropriately for Future Nights. Ugh. I'll be back in a
Don't Take My Word For It
Hey! Time to write some more. I'm in a GOOD mood now. I
got to move A BOX. There was a box behind Our Car I noticed on walk.
MOVED THAT SUCKER TO THE SIDE. Fun And Productive! Put it
on the grass and not out in the street. Hopefully it gets the message
and stays there. If there's enough wind it may blow out into the
street again. But that's not my problem anymore! It is if it
blows out specifically behind Our Car. Not my problem! My
Dad's problem! His Car His Problem! Anyway what else is going
on. More or less on Reasonable Schedule today. My walks take
slightly less time than 6 months ago on account of walking faster on account
of weighing less and being more used to walking. Entry Writing takes
less time on account of... weighing less?... and being more used to...
walking? The point is Great Everything Takes Less Time.
So I got that going for me. I assume no one was
watching us watch Synagogue Live Feed. Other than God.
But he doesn't need a Counter-Live Feed to watch us. He can do it from
The Clouds Where He Lives. Anyway. William Shatner made it Past
God. God doesn't live in space. He lives in the clouds!
Everyone knows this. Except for Mormons. But they're just being
difficult. What else is going on. Anyway all things being
equal I'd rather live Underground than In The Sky. More fun! I
think God should switch places with The Devil is the point. Live in
some nice underground bunker for Heaven. It'd be more fun than it
sounds! Also It Already Sounds Fun. And now I'm saying it'll
be MORE FUN? This great news keeps getting better and better!
What news. Heaven switching place with Hell news. Oh
Right, That News. Also if you're from America and you go to Hell
and then you keep digging eventually you reach Australia?
That'd be my guess.
Third paragraph of the act. And all I had to do
was be Comfortable Typing And Sharing Bullshit. Alright!
I assume if you're in Hell you get a break maybe one day a week. Where
you get to have a generally decent and comfortable time. Ya gotta have
SOME sort of relief every now and then, right? That's what I'm
counting on at least. Ugh. Getting close to the time
where I will cut Diet In Half. Go halfway between Current Diet To Lose
Weight and what I project will be Ultimate Diet To Maintain weight.
We're talkin a matter of weeks! Amazing. Everything is a
matter of weeks. Ten years is a matter of 520 weeks. WOW
I CALCULATED HOW MANY WEEKS ARE IN 10 YEARS LIKE IT WAS NOTHIN'?!?!
GENIUS. Also half a day is a matter of 1/14th weeks. See
everything just like I said. Things that aren't measurements of
time though are NOT matters of weeks. Though! Maybe somehow I
could figure out how that might work. But I don't want to right now!
I want to do it LATER. I'll update you TOMORROW. First
instinct is make some pun with Matter of Weaks or something. I'll mull
that one over.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Any other
homophobe for Week. Sure I know words. Maybe you're the one
who doesn't know words. Week. Weak. All I could think
of off the top of my head! What else. Been a while since I took
a shower. I think I may take a shower today! And I'm not jus
speaking ERRONEOUSLY. Or such that I will probably change my mind
later when the time comes. I think I will actually shower!
Great just great. I haven't been to a Family Celebration Party
since I was a teenager. I was invited to Cousin Bar Mitzvah Party!
I might have gone if not for Pandemic Semi Quarantine! GREAT JUST
GREAT. I COULD HAVE BEEN EATING HOR DOURVES TOMORROW AND NOW I'M STUCK
NOT... EATING HOUR DERVES... What a jip! I could look up how
to spell Hor Dourves correctly. I DID look it up. But then I
lost interest while reading the right way to do it and was like eh I'll
just stick with what I went with originally. Go figure!
Last paragraph of the act! I could have gotten
Hor Dourves from Super Market. It's just not the same!
Wonderful. What else is going on and crap. Oops almost forgot to
Italicize the Super in Super Market. That may be the one
thing I've been consistent about for the last year. Not sure why!
Was it EVER an explicit joke somehow. Such that it seemed funny or
clever to do it. Or have I just been doing it 3 times a day for a year
without explaining or understanding why. I think that's it.
Oh well that's life I guess. OH RIGHT. Because I wanted to
emphasize this market is SUPER. Now it's all coming back to me.
The point is what else is going on. I get to take a shower VERY soon.
It's gonna be a blast and a half. Oh that reminds me have to Twist
The Shower Knob to adjust Shower Stream Settings to, "Blast & A Half," mode.
That was important to say! It got me to the end of the paragraph
just as I suspected it might! Be back soon.
I See What I Did There
When diet is cut in twine I will have LEGITIMATE BREAKFASTS as well as
Slightly More Snack. Sounds good to me. That's why I went
ahead and typed it here. I already knew it but just saying it again
gave me a good feeling! What else is going on. Gonna take a nice
mid-sized break between Entry and Next Walk. Probably roughly half an
hour! Wow I don't believe it. I can accomplish Looking
Forward To Late Afternoon MLB Game Today. I can watch that game like
it was nothin'! Then again If It Is Like Nothin' maybe I'd rather
watch something else. I don't wanna watch Nothin'! I'd
rather watch Somethin'! That's my official position FOR NOW.
Maybe FOR LATER. Definitely for THE IMMEDIATE FUTURE. The
Immediate Future is kind of an oxy-moron right. Maybe I'm the
oxy-moron! Interesting counter-point.
Hey! Got coffee going on. That will last me
roughly into the end of the fourth of five paragraphs this entry.
Wonderful! I've been alerted it's UNLIKELY that Film Subject Billy
Beane will come to The Mets. GREAT JUST GREAT. We're
gonna have to settle for someone who has barely been referenced in Major
Motion Pictures at all. The point is I might have changed my
mind on how to root for in Major League Baseball American League
Championship Series To Remember Until A Few Days Later When Major League
Baseball World Series Starts. I just kinda don't like The Red Sox!
Astros I might dislike slightly less! Amazing. Look
you've got Red Socks we get it. Quit bragging! No one likes a
braggart! Maybe other braggarts! Because they can relate to each
other! Huh. I will not be having pizza today BUT for
lunch I can have, without giving TOO much away, something Reminiscent of
Pizza in SEVERAL ingredients. That's all I'm saying! Leave the
rest to our collective imagination! Not really my imagination! I
know for sure!
Anyway. The main similarity is IT CAN BE
MICROWAVE'D. JUST LIKE PIZZA. Well it's one of the main
similarities at least. Ugh. Let's move on.
Microwave. That's when you wave at someone with Only The Wrist And Up.
Funny. Great stuff. Where do I come up with this stuff.
Mostly from The Wrist Up. ACCURATE. I'm not thinking
this. I'm just coming up with it in my hands (mostly fingers).
So I got that going for me. Hmm does that mean I'm Actively Not
Thinking At All Right Now? Partly! Uh oh My Brain Doesn't
Know What To Do During These Sentences. That ain't good! Got
rid of one of my old sweatshirt jackets. I don't have a problem with
it but it has some sort of chalky type chalk on the back of it which I guess
was a deal breaker for my Mom. Not sure what it was. Couldn't be
chalk. I didn't have this jacket in high school. MAY have had
it in Queens College. But chalk RARELY came into play there.
Maybe some rooms HAD chalk board but I never used 'em! Not like in
high school. You gotta use chalkboards all the time! Write out
your Math Results for Homework and whatnot.
Penultimate paragraph! Wonderful. Who was
the guy who first came up with snapping a piece of chalk in two and then
suddenly there's two pieces of chalk. At some point SOMEONE
must have been the first. I envy them. What else is going
on. HMM what's the ranking of the four Major League Baseball Teams
Left In The Playoffs SOLELY on the abbreviation they have. For clarity
let's go through them-- Boston Red Sox is BOS. Houston Astros is HOU.
Los Angeles Angels is LAD. And Atlanta Braves is ATL. 4) BOS 3)
LAD 2) HOU 1) ATL. I feel this isn't really up for debate.
Maybe the reason I like ATL is because it was a movie. And I'm a big
fan of Cinema. Ugh. What else is going on. I just
finished coffee. EXACTLY when I said I would. MAYBE a single
sentence earlier. Very close though is the point. What else do I
got going on. Should there be more uniform ways to abbreviate teams?
BOS and HOU are just the first three letters of Team Location. LAD is
abbreviation of Location --> Team Name. ATL is just letters of the
name of the location chosen for Strategy And Style. No. We
don't need a Standard Way. I LIKE that each team has some wiggle
room with how they wanna abbreviate.
Last paragraph! I don't believe it.
I get to do Stuff Or Somethin' over the course of the upcoming day.
And presumably my life! I feel tomorrow I will still get to do stuff
for the most part. Amazing. Hmm. Maybe play some
Rocksmith today. That'd be vaguely productive. I've made
musics in the past and maybe I want to one day in the future. This way
I will be slightly better at doing that one would imagine. Maybe
slightly worse. Can't discount that possibility completely.
The point is this little cousin never came to MY Bar Mitzvah why should I
come to HIS. One of my only memories from my Bar Mitzvah involved
my other of 2 cousins who isn't the one whose the father of this Little
Cousin. I was leaving the party before everyone else was gone to hang
out with my friends somewhere else and he was like don't do anything I
would do! And it annoyed me. A) We're not friends I don't
know what you would do! B) I'm just going to hang out okay I'm not
gonna do anything special C) Look I feel guilty enough about leaving
the party already let's just leave it at that and go our separate ways
quietly and respectfully. And that's how I transitioned From Boy To
Man. Wonderful. I've talked about this Cousin Interaction
before. I'm not sure why. I'll be back tomorrow!
October 15, 2021
Let's Have Collective Good Time
Hi friends. Gotta write another entry right now. It's what I did
yesterday Thus it's what I have to do today! I can't be doing new
things Todays compared to Yesterdays. I'd get confused! Also
you can be doing the most unproductive things possible (like this!) but if
you do the same thing every day I feels like you're doing something
important. You're keeping on schedule! That's A Job Well Done!
Anyway. Will be accepting Super market delivery today.
Possibly before Act I is finished! AMAZING. I finished my
soda before taking my first walk. Gotta go 1-3 hours without soda!
Hmm. Sometimes I forget It's Only Me who drinks so much soda all
the time. Kinda feels like a universal experience to me because of how
ingrained it is in my life. As far as I know you never drink
soda. Maybe once a week. Oh well that's your problem not
mine. If anything it's GOOD for me. More soda for me!
Then again if no one is buying soda they'll stop making
it. They're not gonna make soda just for me. They should but
they won't! Hmm. What other kind of Non-Product 19
Products should they be making just for me. How about DIFFERENT AND
NEW FLAVORS of SODA. Yep that sounds about right. I'd suck
on some Candy Canes. They make candy canes for everyone.
Thanks a lot. Super market was out of Diet Lemon Snapple so I
got Diet VITAMIN WATERS instead. WOW WATER? VITAMINS?
Those are LITERALLY the two healthiest things you can drink in one.
Also the vitamin flavor I got was Lemon. High in Vitamin Lemon.
Watched a nice Subtitled Shutter The Screaming Service movie
yesterday. Spooky! I like covering halfway between my eyes and
the screen when I just KNOW a Fright is coming. I don't close my eyes.
I wanna see SOME of what's going on. I cover my eyes with my hand
about a half a foot out. Not totally covering my head but blocking
part of my eyeline. I get THE GIST of what's going on without seeing
The Real Spookiness Shock Picture. It's called STRATEGY.
Anyway. I like that Stephen King book turned
into movie turned into TV Mini Series The Gist. Wait a second.
No I Don't. Oh well you get the point. Just once I'd like to
see Stephen King write a novelization of a movie. It ought to go both
ways! Also it'd be SPOOKY. Why is Stephen King doing this it
seems strange and vaguely beneath him. Scary to consider what
exactly is going on in this situation! Huh. They should
have Challenges where an author challenges another author to re-write the
same book the original author wrote. Huh. Not sure what
that accomplishes. Either the thing I described OR me describing the
thing in the first place. Neither really accomplishes much!
Major League Baseball game was decided last night. The Dodgers beat
the Giants! Well good for them what a great end to a season.
WHAT? THEY NEED TO WIN EIGHT MOE GAMES O BE CHAMPION? That's
A LOT of games. People think oh 2 series and each series they
can lose a bunch of games and still win. Nope! They MUST win
eight and exactly eight games. GOOD LUCK WITH THAT. You
Cool. The Team I root for has won ZERO games this
post season. Not 100% sure they won a single game since August
to be honest. I think I'd remember something like that! August
and Honest are a slant rhyme AT LEAST. Let's talk about it!
We just did. Fair Enough! My Mom made coffee again today.
Pretty sure this time I really won't have enough for 2nd cup. Gonna
have to make more this time around. You heard it here first.
I hope so. If you heard it somewhere else first That Scares Me I Don't
Like The Implications Of That. BEST CASE scenario is my Mom has a blog
and updated you on this. I don't like that much but it's MUCH better
than any other possibilities. Feel like I've said 80% of this entry
before. And 80% of that is dumb and pointless. You know what
that means! There's SOME AMOUNT of things that are okay.
Lemme think on that math for a while. NAH NEVER MIND. I'd
have to come up with other figures and variables to use in the equations
beyond those two 80%'s and I got better things to do one would
Yeah! Gonna be accepting super market
delivery and putting stuff away myself. My Dad is taking my Mom to get
her EYEGLASSES. WOW she can choose any style she wants.
We're talking PLASTIC. We're talking METAL. I THINK THAT'S
IT. Pretty sure you can get covid from eye to eye contact.
You put your eye right up in someone's finger or anything else Covid
DEFINITELY can get through your tear ducts. That's probably THE MAIN
way people get it to be honest. So does that mean if you keep your
eyes closed around town you won't get covid. Yes that's exactly
what it means. And you can take that to the bank! Not sure why
you'd want to! But you can if you feel like it! Said that
before. I think it's interesting that if I'm repeating myself it's
more likely o be DUMB AND POINTLESS than GOOD AN DWORTHWHILE. That's
why it keeps occurring to me. Because it's dumb and I'm not thinking
hard enough. If I'm actually Thinking and Trying To Do Good then
something new would naturally come to me! Hey that's life oh well
great jus great.
Nothing is worse to me than knowing I'm repeating myself
(except for knowing I'm repeating myself AND knowing that it's worthless
anyway) but maybe you don't really mind. For me I get the Sense
Memory of the last time I said whatever I'm repeating. I can't place
exactly when I said it or how close it was exactly but I can FEEL the
repetition in my bones. Maybe for you it barely even occurs to you.
That's the dream, right? Repeating yourself with absolutely no
consequences (legal or otherwise). Hmm great. Got coffee
going on. Wonderful! Hmm. Dodgers. Wondered 5 or 7
times on the website what that name is all about. NEW THING IDEA--
maybe they were originally a Dodge Ball Team? Only thing I can
think of where Dodging makes sense. This was BEFORE Vietnam so no one
had ever thought about Dodging Drafts before. Hmm. Gotta
imagine people dodged the draft in every war ever before then.
CONSCRIPTION wars at least. We just chose NOT TO GLAMORIZE IT like
Hollywood did in the 1960's. THOSE ASSHOLES.
Wonderful. Gotta imagine Hollywood is rooting
for Los Angeles Dodgers. Hollywood lives in Los Angeles! Per my
understanding. When the next military draft comes along is it possible
I could apply to be in The Space Force. Gotta imagine at SOME point
Space Force will become a legitimate wing of Military Military Complex.
Either now or later. That sums that up. Also I feel being
very short would be an ASSET in space. I can move around the rocket
ship EASIERLY. Then again I got mental problems that means they
wouldn't put me in Army Army or Other Wings Army. ALRIGHT finally
this is paying off IN DIVIDENDS. Not sure what Dividend means.
Some sort of portmanteau of Divide and End. Off the top of my head
that sounds about right. Gotta imagine Portmanteau is a Portmanteau of
Port, Man, and.. Toe? Gotta imagine I said that roughly ONCE
Eighth paragraph! I don't believe it. Can't
take my next walk until after Super Market delivery comes.
That's part of life I guess. The MAIN part. Ugh.
Who was the first Obese Person In Space. I feel like I dunno what
William Shatner looks like but he could be Sneaky Obese. Lots of old
people are Sneaky Obese. Unhealthy and don't care but jus wear very
wide fitting shirts so we're none the wiser. The point is We Must Send
Obese People Into Space so hey can check scales Not On Earth and see they
weigh less and then have a Pizza Party once they get back to Earth. F
irst Pizza in space. I'd eat the first pizza in space once it came
down to Earth and someone delivered it to my house. Assuming it's not
contaminated with Space Mold or something. The point is I Like
Pizza! Pizza is a portmanteau of Pee and Zuh. Amazing.
Penultimate paragraph of the act. First
mentally ill person in space. SEVERELY mentally ill.
Gotta be someone. That sounds dangerous. They might try
to take over space because they're not operating at 100% Mentally. And
then where would be! Suddenly this jerk is in charge of space and
there's very little we can do about it! What else is going on.
Pretty sure even in Air Force they preferred shorter people.
Presumably because that's just That Much Less Plane you need to make.
Just make is 91% of the normal size for everything in the plane. Keep
everything proportional to the pilot! Makes sense. Maybe
I should write a pilot for a TV show. Makes sense. I
guess. Anagram of Pilot Lipitor. Lipotor is a cholesterol
medication. What's going on again. I feel like I'm on the
generic for lipitor. Either that or Lipotor. The brand name
is Lipitor but the generic is Lipotor. You'd think so wouldn't
you. What do you mean you wouldn't. What are you an idiot or
Yeah! Super market delivery just came!
Which is good that I can take a walk whenever I want when this is over.
But it's BAD because I had a lot of time to think while putting stuff away
about how worthless this entry has been so far. Very frustrating!
Luckily it takes 10-15 minutes to put stuff away. So that didn't last
too long! Uh oh I have the entire rest of the day to be upset about
Quality Of Entry. AND THIS PARAGRAPH ISN'T HELPING. I'm
just digging myself deeper into something. I wanna say some sort of
hole. Off the top of my head that's what people dig. Except
for Courtney Love's band. People don't dig that Hole.
Maybe they do. I've never heard a Courtney Love song. Gotta
imagine there's music and possibly vocals. Better LTURQ at some
point. Maybe Hole is good. What do I know. I just
assumed it was bad. Possibly because of Misogyny! Anyway great
I'm gonna take a walk now!
I Don't Have Problem With That
Wonderful. Back here to write some more. The good news is It's
Not Great but It Takes Up Time. For me at least! I assume if you
read this it tangibly kills some of your time! So we got that going
for us is the point. What's the point of life other than killing
time. Hmm TWENTY other things? I feel like maybe the
21st most important thing in life is killing time. Not a bad showing
all in all but for most people there's plenty of other things to prioritize!
Oh well. Gotta remember to make coffee after this act and
before cleansing experience. So I have it ready to drink for the last
4 paragraph of act iii! Sure great what else. Enjoying
this new sweatshirt jacket! It bunches up in the belly in a strange
and weird way but it kind of looks okay from the outside and feels okay from
the inside. Wow Strange AND Weird? Anyway Only I Know
it's a Strange And Weird Bunching which isn't so bad. I don't mind
being the only one who knows about World Problems. I'll take that
Sure. I've been getting into a habit of having a
Breakfast From The Griddle meal roughly once every two days. Which is
roughly once every four meals. Not including Microbreakfasts of those
meals! Anyway it's delicious and presumably I'm eating reasonable
portions and what more do you want from me. Get off my back about it!
Hmm anything I'm not thinking From The Griddle I might like.
Pancakes Waffles and Freedom Toast! That's all I can think of.
What about A DIFFERENT KIND of Freedom Toast. That's the same
thing you idiot. Hmm. Gotta imagine there's SOME other
way to make a Breakfast Centric Griddle Meal that I and/or They aren't
thinking of! I dunno. I don't think there is. I
guess now I know what I want to accomplish in life. Set into motion
Them Thinking Of Another Breakfast Centric Sweetish Meal. I can't
think of it MYSELF. But maybe I can raise funds for someone
else to figure it out. I'm GREAT at raising funds.
Presumably. I've never done it before. And I'd probably be bad
at it. But if you don't take those two things into consideration I'm
Yeah! What else is going on. Probably more
important and/or interesting stuff. That'd be my guess off the top of
my head. Hey there's a Major League Baseball game going on tonight.
Starting at 8:07.5 P.M.? Well that does me no good. My bed
time will be around the 7th inning. Pointless to even start
watching it! Forget the 7th inning stretch I'm doing a 7th inning
Go Home And Go To Bed and Read About Last Inning and A Half in the newspaper
the next day. That's how I roll! LOOK I can get other
breakfasts that aren't From The Griddle. Omelet for example!
Those are good too but Different Very Different. Hmm I should be
getting those too though. Maybe a Steak and/or Eggs. Delicious!
Breakfast Burrito. Just the sound of those words get me off a little
bit! Hmm. Maybe keep that kind of thing to myself.
Look I didn't get this far in life Keeping Things To Myself. I got
this far in life by Keeping Nothing To Myself. Kind of not in a
great place in life all in all so maybe I've been doing things wrong!
But I ain't changing course now! Pot committed at this point to
Whatever I've Been Doing I Forget!
Wonderful. Getting closer to finishing act.
Then taking cleansing experience. Then writing a paragraph.
THEN IT'S TIME TO DRINK COFFEE. Gotta have things to look forward
to in life. Right now it's next cup of coffee! Get off my back
about it, etc. Been a while since I had a non-regular-coffee coffee.
Last thing may have been Dumb Supermarket Cold Coffee halfway through 2020.
Not iced coffee! No ice! Just somewhat cold. Anyway no
ESPRESSO or CAPPUCCINO or COFFEE COOLATTA. Hey Coolata I just got
it. Like a COOL LATTE. It's a pormatantou! Also Coffee
means Coffee Flavored. I already had figured that out implicitly if
not explicitly. Sure I know what implicit means. I know it
implicitly. THAT'S what it means dumby. Cool Latte.
Kinda always implicitly thought it mean This is A LOTTA COOL. No I
didn't. Well whatever I thought it was CLOSER to Lotta Cool than
Cool Latte. Fair Enough!
One more paragraph of the act! I don't believe
it. Sure I do. That's more accurate I guess. What
else is going on. One huge benefit of getting Internet Super
Market Delivery instead of going to Local Super Market and DIY is that when
you get soda from Internet Delivery it's COLD. They keep it cool in
their truck somehow (Refrigeration?). When you get it locally it's not
refrigerated in supermarket let alone in Our Transportation Car. Would
take HOURS if not DAYS to cool up in our fridge. This New Way COLD
RIGHT AWAY WONDERFUL. Probably talked about that before. On
account of how important it is to my life. Makes sense.
They don't HAVE to refrigerate 2 liter bottles of soda but they do it
anyway! They go the extra mile! Except not literally! If
they were going the extra mile they'd be 20 blocks away from my house and
Lotta Good That Does Me! NOTTA LOTTA. That sort of thing.
Hey I'll be back in a little bit.
This May Or May Not Be It
Hello friends. Cleansed myself! Took a bath. Not sure
why I was keeping that close to the vest. I feel like if I'm not
telling you explicitly what I'm having for meals I should also forego
telling you what kind of cleansing experience I have. Also have I
been telling you implicitly my meals? My guess? For the most
part? Not really! The Breakfastcentric talk was halfway there
but for the most part I'm good about keeping my promise of not going into
details of lunch and dinner but especially lunch. I'd talk about
dinner, too, sure, but it's the LUNCH that was the problem area.
Ugh. What else is going on. Parents aren't back yet!
One can only hope it's because my Mom is Really Putting The Time In to pick
a pair of glasses she's happy with. I wish her all the happiness in
the world. Well maybe 20% of the happiness in the world.
Also 20% for my dad and for my brother separately. And I get 40%.
That sounds JUST and FAIR. Hmm probably should leave over 10%
happiness for Everyone Else. That's coming out of My Brother's
Happiness!!! Here come coffee.
Ya know what? Take the 10% out of my happiness!
I'm down to 30% but that's still way more than enough. I actually
get a tangible Jolt Of Pride from saying that. HEY I'M A GREAT GUY
TAKING 10% OF TOTAL HAPPINESS OUT OF MY HAPPINESS. I should be proud
of myself! Because I'm an IDIOT. Started drinking coffee
part ii. Amazing! Not 100% sure what to watch what takes place
In The Television Set today but I think a movie or two from Shutter The
Screaming Service is one way to go. Maybe an In English one.
That's the language I speak! Easy to understand! I've been
understanding this language my entire life so it should be pretty easy all
in all. Anyway. Should have gotten a different flavor of Vitamin
Waters. I got a pack of six Normal Travel Sized ones. ENERGY.
Lemon. That's probably my #1 standard from back in the day. But
I SHOULD have gone with ESSENTIAL. Orange. Either way I'm
covered on those flavors in SODA. I got orange and Sprite
(Lemon/Lime). Ugh. The point is it's eating me up inside
and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it!
Sure. Great. I dunno! What other
flavor should I have gotten other than Energy or Essential. I remember
getting the XXX flavor a lot because a lot of places have 1 or 2 Zero
Calorie flavors at most and that was a standard. And I always felt bad
about getting it. Not because it's pornography but because I didn't
anticipate liking the flavor no matter how many times I had it and it was
good enough. Anyway let's see what else I could have gotten from the
Super Market Website. Hmm. Could have gotten PINK flavor.
"Shine." Strawberry Lemonade type concoction. I've gotten that
before sure. But I don't like how it's a little too feminine for my
tastes. Leave the pink beverages to the ladies! I'm all about
ORANGE or.. Lemon...? What color is lemon flavor. Not yellow!
Hmm. Neon. That can't be right, Any Color can be Neon.
Neon isn't a color it's a way color can be. I dunno I feel like
Neon is also A Color In And Of Itself. What else is going on.
Penultimate paragraph! Ne-On is the name of
someone in some sort of Eastern Asian language. Sounds about right.
I'm not being racially insensitive because I'm not JUDGING. I'm not
saying its good one way or the other! That's for you to decide.
What else is going on. I think if you say Asian, people assume you
mean Eastern Asian. But I'm being SUPER not racially insensitive by
being EXPLICIT about it. You thought something IMPLICITLY? I'm
gonna show you the error of your ways and now we all know for in the future
we must be EXPLICIT. Huh. Lost track of what I was talking
about. Which is probably a good thing. Not 100% sure what I was
talking about but relatively sure It Wasn't Great. Anyway.
What's non-Eastern Asian. MONGOLIA. That shuttem up.
Hey after the next sentence after this one roughly I only have to write one
more paragraph! That sentence I was talking about in the last
sentence is this sentence.
Wonderful. I like watching recent horror
movies from across the globe because I'm always impressed by the conditions
people live in across the globe. Hey they got nice towns there too.
Some nice buildings and technology. Good food and clothes.
Everyone seems to be living decently in these Horror Movies. UNTIL the
Horror Starts. But before then Hey Great I'm Happy For Them.
I was worried all other people lived in squalor! Anyway probably gonna
take a pretty nicely decent sized break between Entry and Next Walk.
Hmm. Maybe it's because 90% of these horror films are found
footage films. So obviously if you're in a story where Characters
and/or Fake Documentary Crews Can Afford Cameras the REST of the lives of
the people involved will be decent enough. I've given myself a lot
to think about. Wait no I haven't. THEY gave me a lot to
think about. I'll get to that at some point one would imagine.
I'll be back tomorrow!
October 14, 2021
This Will Entertain Me
What's going on Friends. My Mom made coffee this morning before I
could. TERRIBLE. She probably made slightly Not Enough.
Maybe enough for me to have 1.66 cups of coffee. I WANT 2.0 CUPS OF
COFFEE. Now I gotta finish this coffee and then either not drink
enough coffee or make a tiny amount of bonus coffee? WHAT THE HELL
IS HER PROBLEM. Other than wanting coffee for herself before I could
make it. Which it turns out isn't a problem because she solved the
problem for herself. But now it's my problem and that
hardly seems fair! I could just pretend this Coffee Making never
happened. Pour it all out and start from scratch. What am
I A SOCIOPATH? That's a lot of coffee to waste! Terrible
idea YOU IDIOT. Anyway I feel like I might take a look at New
Sweatshirt Jacket today. It's been long enough! Now's the time
To Look At Things!
Wonderful. I hope it looks good (1) but is
comfortable (2). And (3) is appropriately warming while in cool
weather. And (4) Exists. If it turns out not to exist that's
a deal breaker I'm never gonna wear it even once! Deal breaker.
More like a WIND BREAKER. Isn't that what they call similar
jackets sometimes? Also it's what you call Someone Who Farts.
Maybe you haven't been calling them that but you can certainly start now.
Gotta imagine there are people out there who never fart. I envy them.
I was thinking because there's something wrong with their body that they
don't produce farts. But maybe they're just 100% on the ball and
resist the urge to fart whenever it comes. Sounds dangerous.
You hold in every fart at some point that triggers some kind of
physiological consequence, right? It must! I think we all
disproportionately fart when no one else is around. More than the body
would do all things being equal! Based on personal choices we make.
We hold it in around other people and then alone we go nuts. So
instead of it being even, we're just never farting around people and
always farting alone. This isn't a complicated observation.
But an important one! So that's something to think about.
Watched The Chucky TV series! Good stuff! I
had a blast and THREE FIFTHS. Amazing. I don't like how
the main characters look like and act like they're in high school but are
actually in middle school. Confusing! They seem like they're in
ninth grade but it's only eighth? This isn't realistic at all NEXT.
I don't wanna see what's Next. It's either this or we move to
something else entirely. The point is Good Stuff! Also
Chucky is a good guy. He helps out his new Friend To The End in a
genuine way. Spoiler Alert! Maybe he turns out to be
motivated by self interest but for now it looks like they're gonna be good
friends. Spoiler Alert! We need a phrase for
Spoiler Alert for when it's already been spoiling and you're alerting
the recipient of your spoiler that you recognize there was some spoiling
going on. Something simple. Maybe just SFS!!! Sorry
For Spoiling. Something along those lines.
You'd think if I was really sorry I'd just go back
and not do it. Well I guess that's a big clue I'm Not Really Sorry!
Thems the breaks! Jackets are called Wind Breakers because they
give you a break from the wind. Without the jacket you're gonna be
Winded On A Lot. Wearing the jacket though? You'll be like
WHAT WIND I FEEL NO WIND. GETTING A NICE BREAK FROM IT BECAUSE OF THIS
GREAT JACKET. That sort of thing. Have I written anything
yet this entry? All I can remember is making the astute observation
that people tend to save farting for themselves. Astute more like
ASS TOOT. There that's something. Right? Ugh.
Also watched episode 1 of Day Of Them Dead. Okay! Didn't
think I'd like it based on the commercials but it was solidly Fine! No
talk about Farting in Day Of Them Dead. Does come up in Chucky though.
Hmm. Does Chucky Fart? Gotta imagine I dunno.
Never seen him shit or piss or eat or drink. Still though that
means nothing re: Him Farting.
Fifth paragraph! Coffee after this paragraph!
This coffee at least will be all the coffee I'm after. Seen Chucky
have sex. And not just dry humping. He created a child so there
was somethin going on there. How can you produce sperm without
eating or drinking. Everyone knows sperm comes from eating and
drinking. Where else would it come from? Huh. I
normally don't like using the word or concept Farting but I feel if I
say it as often as I have been this entry it loses all its power.
Which is what we should strive for re: Using This Word. Sure great.
Some guy in Norway is killing people with a bow and arrow? I Disagree!
He's killing people with arrows. He uses the bow to get the arrow into
them. But it's decidedly the arrow that's killing them. I
dunno. You say people die from Gun Violence. Not bullet
violence. That suggests the opposite of what I was saying.
FINE he's killing people with BOWS NOT with arrows is that an okay
observation? I don't think so. Great everything I say is
wrong! Well not everything. Only Most Things.
They had a Friday The 13th Marathon yesterday.
Because it was Wednesday the 13th. Look at this rate you're gonna
have to have Friday The 13th Marathons 5 times a month. Once for
every 13th and once for every Friday. This franchise is gonna LOSE
ALL MEANING at this rate. Also before this rate. Meant very
little from the getgo! Teenagers shouldn't have sex while children
who can't swim drown. I got that much out of it at least.
And if they do they will get killed by the mother of the kid who drowned
later on. Sorry For Spoiling! Also when it's Supernatural
Jason who starts killing people what's his problem. Clearly
he's not totally dead. Just brush himself off and move on with his
life. Also was Jason a regular kid before Drowning or some kind of
Special Needs kid. I get the sense he needed some Extra Attention as a
child. What else is going. On! Poured myself coffee.
If my Mom is done with her coffee for the day I think I DO have enough for a
full 2nd cup later on. YEAH. YEAH!
Seventh paragraph. I don't believe it.
Nice exciting baseball game today tonight. TOO late for me.
I'd have gotten a blast and a tenth out of watching it in the afternoon or
so but 9:07 PM is way past my bedtime. Well, before my bed time.
But half the game is legitimately past my bed time! Unless they wrap
the game up in 20 minutes. Which they might! Keep it simple
that's what I say. What would happen if two teams decided to make a
pact to just stop playing after five innings. What could be done?
The umpires would just have to deal with it! Maybe give Both Teams
a loss in the standings. That sounds like a reasonable way to deal
with these troublemakers. Anyway what else is going on.
Halfway into October. Pretty much! Not exactly but we're into
the Period Of Several Days which is halfway through. Wonderful.
AMAZING. Trick Or Treaters coming up! I feel like in Red
States they will insist their children go trick or treating and insist they
don't wear any costume because that's how anti-mask they are. NOPE
YOU AIN'T WEARING THE SCREAM FILM SERIES GHOSTFACE MASK PEOPLE MIGHT GE THE
WRONG IDEA AND THINK YOU'RE DOING IT FOR SAFETY. YOU'RE GONNA GO
AROUND TOWN MASKLESS OR ELSE I'M CUTTING OFF YOUR ALLOWANCE. Hey
great they're getting an allowance in this situation! I want an
allowance. WHERE'S MY ALLOWANCE.
Whatever. CAN we be wearing Ghostface
Masks for safety? Gotta imagine it would help A LITTLE bit!
Better than nothing is the point. ALSO YOU CAN'T COME HOME UNTIL
YOU HAVE COVID. That's the Red State Adult talking to his poor kid
again. You could tell because it's in capital letters and italics!
Just like in previous paragraph. Hey great how about that.
Did the Romans invent Italics. Italics rings of Italy to me. And
The Romans were Italy. I dunno. I can't imagine Roman
Numerals in Italics! Wait yes I can. So that settles that I
guess. There was a kid in my high school whose name was Roman.
Dumb Looking Kid! That's all I remember. Can't picture him
exactly but I remember at the time just thinking poor kid looks like some
sort of dumb looking kid. Not Special Needs dumb. Just Jerk
Dumb. Wonderful just wonderful.
I feel like as I get older my definition of
jerk has changed. Along with my definition of asshole.
And they've both changed in the same direction! Jerk and asshole used
to mean someone who antagonizes people and whatnot. NOW they mean some
sort of Chump. I feel like my first impressions on who are jerks and
assholes is more ACCURATE but it's more FUN to use those words to mean Some
Sort Of Chump. Wonderful. Ninth paragraph. I guess.
How many people over the last year and a half went out of their way to get
covid. And I
don't mean went out of their way to endure
circumstances which might give them covid. I mean literally
just kept doing dangerous things until they got covid because that was their
goal. A hundred? A thousand? Those would be my
first two Logarithm Guesses. Those are logs right. Something
with exponents of 10 or something? I don't have all the details in
front of me which is clear because what I am saying makes little
Last paragraph of the act! And all I had to do
was Not Say Anything Worthwhile. Yeah! Maybe I
should load up Blitzkrieg Bop on Rocksmith and don't play the first
2/3rds of the song and then start playing only the last 1/3rd. That
way I can get the hang of playing that last third correctly! Hmm
that sounds interesting except for the fact that I'm assuming the last third
is the exact same thing as the first two thirds. So I wouldn't
really be getting that much out of it! Wonderful. I like
songs that don't change over time. Easy to listen to and get! Oh
this portion of the song is the same thing repeated from the first part.
I'm not confused at all over this! Makes sense to me!
Wonderful. Happened to be up to the Twilight Zone episode of William
Shatner seeing Monster on the side of the plane. Which makes me
realize that people forgot about that reference to make while talking about
him going up in rocket ship. He could have seen monster on the side of
the rocket ship! I brought that up to my Dad and he said William
Shatner himself made that reference when talking about his Recent Space
Experience. Yeah but I DIDN'T SEE THAT you idiot. So when it
came to me it was brand new! Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.
What A Productive Day
Tried on my new sweatshirt jacket. Good stuff! A material of
jacket I never had before! Feel like it's a WARMTH Material which
means I may be able to wear this jacket for the next month OR EVEN FIVE
WEEKS. WOW! Also this isn' a sweatshirt jacket.
Just a jacket! I'm not sure it doubles as a sweatshirt at all.
Not so far off from Sweatshirt but whatever. Sweatshirt doesn't
sound appealing. I don't want a shirt that makes me sweat! I
don't have AXE BODY SPRAY as of now and if I'm sweating that will turn off
all the beautiful ladies I come into contact with. That and
EVERYTHING ELSE about me. Oh well that's part of life. Not
impressing Imaginary ladies! Thems the breaks. Started watching
the Christ Rock Saw Movie last night. Only 10 minutes left! But
I decided I was too tired to finis hit last night and went to sleep.
This ten minutes will be A HASSLE AND A HALF having to keep my eyes open.
That was the decision I made and I stand by it!
Great paragraph. I liked the part where it
ended. Amazing. Also I kind if liked the part where it ended
the least. Because it really drove the point home to me this
paragraph was completely worthless. Before it ended there was hope
I could turn things around a little bit! Now all hope is gone.
GREAT. Successfully got enough soda his week to last me the entire
week more or less. GREAT. And this time I MEAN IT.
Hmm what's a good anagram of Great. Gear't. Everyone knows what
GEAR means. I'm just adding a 'T! Yep that makes sense.
I feel like GEAR has a slang meaning. "Cool," or something.
HEY BRO THAT'S GEAR. That sort of thing. And if not yet
now's the time to start using that. It sounds about right,
doesn't it? What else is going on. Now that I think about it I
feel like there's an over 50% chance Gear was used in Mod-Talk.
In The 1960's Britain. Solid More Likely Than Not on that one.
Oh well that's life.
Yeah! Not only do I got enough soda for the
week I've got a fair amount of snapple for the next 24 hours, too!
Wow SNAPPLE? That's HEALTHY. Juice! Doesn't get
healthier than juice! Sure it does. Most juice is probably
unhealthy. Lots of sugar. Either way I'm happy with my
Snapple Supply so get off my back about it! I think Ringo Starr even
says Gear! in The Simpsons. I'd LTURQ but some things are
better left to the imagination. HOWEVER The Beatles didn't call people
BRO. So the sentence HEY BRO THAT'S GEAR hasn't been done
yet up until Me Right Now. So I'm performing a public service
somehow is the point! Amazing. Might have to wait 10 or 15
minutes after Act II before Cleansing Exercise. Dad wants me to listen
for Doorbell up to a point. I'm okay with that! Not a big
difference. Think of all I could accomplish in 10 or 15 minutes!
Masturbate. Off the top of my head. That's about the right
amount of time for that.
How dare you think about judging me! For
either Masturbating In General or for How Long I'm Implying I Masturbate For
One Masturbation At A Time. Or even for just Talking About
Masturbating. The point is There's Lots You Can Judge Me For Here but
you'd be wrong to do so ON ALL COUNTS. So get off my back about
it is the point! What kind of stuff do I have to look forward to for
the rest of the day. I dunno! That's fun. I get to be
SURPRISED. I dunno. I'm kind of All Ready And Set for the
inevitable Not Much Going On. Won't catch me by surprise that much
at all! But the good news is.. uh.. I was pretty sure there was
Some Good News here somewhere. Lemme think about that and I'll get
back to you. No I Won't. I might. Yeah it's
possible I guess.
Wonderful! Lots of STRIKES going on. I feel somewhat guilty for
crossing the picket line and writing this entry. I should be
striking myself. Not sure how that would work exactly. Not
sure about a lot these days!
Last paragraph of
the act! Wonderful. I think Big Businesses should COUNTER
STRIKE. Unless the workers accept Big Business's terms and conditions
FACTORY IS CLOSING DOWN NO WORK FOR ANYONE TODAY. That'll show the
workers who means business! Business means business! That's
where they get the name from in the first place! It's possible I
don't understand how economics work. VERY possible. Anyway.
Maybe start wearing new sweatshirt jacket as soon as Next Walk.
VERY possible. What else is going on. Looks like I'll have
only 5 minutes to kill before being able to take Cleansing Activity.
Hmm. What can be done in five minutes. When I was in high
school we had 5 minutes between classes. Get from one side of the
building on the 3rd floor to the other side on the 9th floor. You need
all that 5 minutes! Also once every two weeks or so there were Shorter
Schedules and they made up for it partly by making it only 4 minutes
between class. The point I think I was trying to make was in
upcoming 5 minutes I can get from one classroom to another in high school.
Not sure how that helps me now! Not sure about a lot of things these
days! Be back soon.
Getting Closer To The Next Entry
Finished Seeing The Saw Movie with free time. Amazing. I like
the part where hey this movie is halfway good enough. Then
again it's also halfway no good enough. Gotta look at the Film as
Half Full. Don't tell me how I gotta look at films! Anyway
what else is going on. Looks like there's a good movie or two on the
Shutter: The Screaming Service to watch today. I think that'll be the
thing I do directly after entry is over! For 15-60 minutes! Then
take a walk! THEN WATCH MORE. Then walk more. THEN WATCH
MORE. Then do that over and over until it's time to start the next
entry. Amazing! Walking? Watching? Talk about
A Great Life. Oh right that's the third thing. Talking
About A Great Life! That's kind of what entries are, right?
I never thought of my life as Great but ya know what? Kinda Good Life
lately! That's what entries are about too INDIRECTLY.
It's the SUBTEXT. Amazing.
Coffee time! The worst thing about life is
The World. I'm worried about it and whatnot! Too many things
that can go wrong. Too few things that can go right! Oh well
that's life what can ya do. Work hard in your own way to make the
world a better place. Yeah but what can ya do That's EASIER.
Nothing. GREAT THEN IT'S SETTLED. What else is going on.
Solidly have enough coffee to my liking for today! Entire 2 cups and
even some left over! I LIKE it when there's a little bit left over
that no one drinks. It makes the world a better place that I'm wasting
resources. Coffee is a recourse, right? And if it isn't
it USES UP resources to produce and distribute! Either way I feel like
it's fun to waste things for fun! Huh. No I Don't.
EXCEPT IN THIS ONE INSTANCE. Wasting Coffee Instance.
What's going on again?
Third paragraph of the act. I feel like when
you're doing The Oregon Trail one thing you can have supplies of is Coffee.
Not sure what that does tangibly to help you make your way across The Oregon
Trail. It must benefit your wagon party somehow.
Something in the algorithm where having more coffee helps you tangibly.
Otherwise why get it! So the point is I forget. Are there
Oregon Trailheads who do the Oregon Trail every year in wagons. My
guess? Probably not! Maybe there should be though.
Ever think about that? No I can say I've never thought about that.
Until Just Now. When I Thought About It. Wonderful. I
feel like some of these Shutter Movies may be in subtitles. Which is
okay 89% of the time but when I'm eating Meal and Watching TV it's not
ideal. I can't Look At My Meal AND Look At The Subtitles at the same
time. I need to HEAR dialogue. I'm gonna wanna stare down my
meal while I'm eating it! Huh.
Penultimate paragraph. One strike going on is
at Kellogg's and I can only hope one result of the strike is that they start
making Product 19 again. Solid 68% chance they made Product 19.
Better LTURQ. YEP IT WAS KELLOGG'S. Man oh man can someone get
me in touch with Strike Leader? They CAN demand for Product 19 if they
wanted to. It'd be kind of tangential to their main goals but WHY NOT.
Let's sneak that in there as one of the terms and conditions. Why
Am I Feeling 81% serious in my head about this. It's a joke.
No question! But in my head I'm Taking Myself Seriously. Oh
well that's life. "We're not making products one through eighteen
until you guarantee a product 19!" That's how that might go.
Wonderful. Anyway jeez what else is going on. WALT WEISS
is being discussed as potential Manager for Mets. I like it! A)
Name Alliteration. B) Recognize him from following baseball in 1990's.
C) What more do you need???
Last paragraph. In Breaking Bad Walter White
was originally named Walt Weiss but they had to change it because of This
Guy. Also Walt Whitman was originally named Walt Weiss but they had to
change it because of This Guy. Well great that got us maybe 1/5h or
6th into the paragraph. I'm happy with that result! It may
not have been pretty ON THE ROAD to that but in the end it was worth it!
Also upon further introspection it's a solid 1/3rd or 1/4th into the
paragraph! If we include the last few sentences too! Which we
should be! Also at THIS point it's MORE THAN HALFWAY into the
paragraph. This just keeps getting better and better! Hmm
what else is going on. That's about it! Looking forward to
wearing New Jacket! That's where my life is at. I'll be back
October 13, 2021
Can I Interest You In Some This
Hello friends! A new day is upon us. Well, me at least.
You may be stuck in yesterday! In which case I wish you the best.
Lots of fun you can have with that! I don't get why Bill Murray is
so annoyed for most of Ground Hog Day. This is an amazing deal!
So much fun you can have! He discovers this halfway through the movie
but only as a device to become a better person later on. Becoming a
better person is NOT FOR ME. I'd just have fun living the same day and
exploiting that for fun purposes for the rest of my life. Because
that's the kind of guy I am! Hmm what kind of fun am I imagining.
Off the top of my head when he repeatedly tricks women into sleeping with
him. Oh right that sure. It's not date rape because they
never find out they were tricked! Also is Tricking Women like Bill
Murray did In Film sort of date rape? It's not all out rape! But
certainly not all out innocent either. Let's talk about it.
Got Chucky TV show lined up to watch today.
I can't wait to see what happens. My guess? Talking Doll!
Off the top of my head that's what I'm expecting. I'd like to see
Chucky play the field more. I know he's into Jennifer Tilly and/or the
character Jennifer Tilly plays and/or The Real Jennifer Tilly. But I
think he could be more of a lothario. Anyway. Just looked up
definition of lothario. That's Bill Murray in Groundhog's Day
alright! Well, for 20 minutes. For most of the movie he's a
decent enough guy. You can't expect guys to be perfect all the time,
though! Everyone gets 20 minutes to be a complete jerk in life.
Hmm. Is that a REAL 20 minutes out of our entire lifespan. Or is
that an equivalent amount of, if our lives were 2 hour long movies, that 20
minutes would take up in the movie. So in other words we get 1/6th
of our lives to be complete jerks. Hmm. Given myself a lot to
think about. I HOPE we can be complete jerks 1/6th of our lives.
That's what I was already aiming for anyway!
What else is going on. No baseball game today!
Great. Just great! I tried playing some Rocksmith
yesterday. Blitzkrieg Bop is a little too fast for me! I can get
2/3rds into the song playing it just about right but then I start to lose
Power and can't hit all them power chords quickly enough. My hands get
tired! This is a long song! Oh well practice makes slightly
better than before presumably. Albright time for a Major League
Baseball Playoff Update! WHO do I root for in 2 upcoming series.
MY PICKS are Red Sox over Astros and Whoever Wins Between Los Angeles and
San Francisco over Atlanta. In the American League I describe the
teams by their team name and in the National League I describe them by the
city they're based in. This is an important distinction to make!
Also these picks are for who to root for, not necessarily who will win.
Then again sure maybe those are the teams that will win I wouldn't put it
past them. Did I write anything important this paragraph?
Oh right. Team names in one league and cities in the other league.
I'm satisfied! What else is going on.
Been a while since I Said LOL. Even longer since I said LMAO.
And it's been a VERY VERY long time since I said ROFL. But now
I got all those bases covered so its time to move on with our lives.
It's important we reply LOL to jokes on the internet. How else
would the original person know we recognize that it's supposed to be
amusing? They might think we're taking them seriously. Sure
great what else is going on. Can't remember the last time someone said
LOL to me. To be fair I can't remember the last time I
communicated with someone over the internet. Possibly 2011.
That sounds about right. But also to be fair I probably wasn't on
top of my game in 2011. Might have been 2007 when I got my last
Lol. The point is I'm looking forward to the future! Not
backwards to the past! Or sideways to the present! Whatever.
Billy Beane MAY be in the cards for Mets GM or Guy In Charge of GM.
HE WAS PORTRAYED IN A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE. Let's get this done!
I'm excited and a half if he's GM or In Charge of GM.
Whatever. I read Moneyball: The Book back in the
day! Pretty sure. 90% sure I remember reading it. And
80% sure I did read it! Sounds about right. I saw the movie
too but that's no accomplishment. Any average Joe can see a movie.
It takes a special kind of Joe who can successfully read a book.
ME. THAT KIND OF JOE. Speaking of JOE I get coffee after
this paragraph. JOE means coffee. Maybe spelled JO. Hmm
better LTURQ and WHY that's the case. It was called, "Joe," because
it was considered a Common Man's drink. Score one for the common
man! I know in history Common Men sometimes got it rough but if they
got coffee it can't be all bad! It can be MOSTLY bad. But
not all! Anyway. Billy BEANE? LIKE COFFEE BEANS?
OH MY. Ugh. Gotta imagine I've written 1 and 1/3rds worth of
worthwhile things so far. YEAH.
My goal is to reach 3 worthwhile things by the end
of the act. I'm a little bit behind pace for that but I think I can
make it! I see there's a new limited edition Meat Protein for
Chipotle. I'd be interested in trying it but it's 200 times the amount
of calories as the previous meat proteins. ALSO the burrito bowls are
500 times the amount of calories I thought they were by checking the
nutritional info on the website because they probably are giving bigger
portions than they advertise. So best to steer clear of all that
together. Is that anything. A sixth of a worthwhile? A
TWELVTH? NO? NOTHING? Damn! What else is going
on. I thought I had a third of a chocolate chip pancake left over for
breakfast today. Nowhere to be found. Boy I sure hope I miscalculated
and didn't eat it in my sleep at some point. Unless I ate it my sleep
and really enjoyed it and got something out of it. Which I didn't.
Because I'd remember something like that!
Seventh paragraph! Unbelievable. Does Billy
Beane ever feel pressure to do some other great notable stuff so there can
be a Moneyball II? My guess? YES IT CONSUMES HIS EVERY WAKING
MOMENT. At least he's not consuming things in his sleep.
Like pancakes! Unless he gets something out of it. Which he
won't. He'd remember something like that! Huh.
Gotta be weird to be played by Brad Pitt: A Universally Celebrated As
Attractive Person. Because then you're in real life looking like just
some jerk. Oh well live and learn. Then again you were
also played by Text In A Book. And you're definitely more handsome
than THAT. Than what. Being in a book? YEAH.
Sure that makes sense why not. On the one hand this entry is flying by
but on the other hand TERRIBLE. Oh well LOTS of time to correct
course. Let's start next paragraph. I've already given up on
YEAH. Anyone still use AIM: THE AOL
INSTANT MESSENGER OFFSHOOT? Let's talk about things and LOL at
each other. Even if neither one of us says anything funny! We'll
make a PACT to be encouraging to one another. Ugh. In the
past sometimes I would think of phrases and think hey that'd be a good
song title. Nowadays I think of phrases and think hey that'd be
a good poker username. Which is odd because I don't play poker at
all anymore. Still though! First instinct is gotta use this
phrase to be a good poker username. It'll throw all the other players
off their game! So I got that going for me. I can't write
songs I can barely play the first 2/3rds of Blitzkrieg Bop.
Anyway. I'd play some real money poker. Except for the technical
difficulty of getting money on and potentially getting it off Poker Client.
And getting my parents to be on board with it. And having to play
poker itself. But without all of those things I'd LOVE to play some
I guess. Ninth paragraph! Still
haven't looked at new sweatshirt jacket yet. Maybe not until Spring!
If it's on the lighter side of possible material it may be too late in the
year to wear it! Oh well that's life. Ordering jackets too
late in the year. What's wrong with that. Means I'm WAY
ahead of the game for next spring. Gotta look at Jacket as Half Full!
Then again just having the jacket lay around for five months it might break
or something. Lose its effectiveness? I dunno! Older
Adults aren't supposed to take aspirin every day for some reason anymore for
some reason? I don't like the sound of that! Or I Do.
Maybe I DO like the sound of that. I feel very strongly about it
one way or the other is the point. Not sure which way but I'm HEAVILY
invested in this. Not sure who I'm rooting for in Final Game of San
Francisco versus Los Angeles. I'm fairly ambivalent either way!
Wow ambivalent? That's the best quality someone cam be! It's
the OPPOSITE of how I feel about Aspirin News. Maybe not THE
opposite. It is AN opposite but not THE opposite. Huh.
Last paragraph of the act! That's good.
I've always dreamt of getting to do something else after this paragraph!
Wonderful. I'd tell you the latest Poker Names I thought of but then
you'd have extra time to adjust to those names. Best keep them close
to the vest from now. I don't have a vest. I've never had a
vest. Maybe it's about time I get a vest! Okay I'll look
into that I guess. How come Superman's Son is gay and everyone is
saying Superman is Gay. Superman's Son isn't Superman. He's
Superson! Either way get off his back. If you don't like it root
for some other super hero. Problem solved! Also he's bisexual it
appears! So just root for him when he likes ladies and not when he
likes fellas. Easy! Hmm. Maybe my problem is that
Superson shouldn't be interested in sex at all. First of all he's half
alien. Second of all he should be busy Saving People And Whatnot.
Third of all that's about it. I'll be back in a little bit.
There's Plenty Website To Go Around
Well hello there friends. Time to write some more paragraphs!
I'm guessing 80% chance I miscalculated thirds of pancakes yesterday and 20%
chance I ate a third of a pancake by accident at some point. Great.
We've all moved on from that story. Clearly WE ALL HAVEN'T.
All includes me! And it's still eating me up inside! Anyway what
else is going on. What do I got in store for today. NO BASEBALL.
That's a positive step in the right direction re: What I Got In Store For
Days. Not really a step in the right direction. Baseball
games resume tomorrow. If it is a step in the right direction then
tomorrow is a 2 step backwards in the opposite direction. Uh oh 2
steps backwards? At this rate I'm gonna trip over myself pretty
quickly. And then I'd look The Fool. Whatever. I think
if Billy Beane becomes GM and makes a great trade for The Mets the headline
the next day should be Billy BEEN'E DOIN' GREAT! Just one idea.
How come Billy isn't capitalized. Costs
money to capitalize letter. Are YOU gonna shell out that money for
each paper printed? Hmm. I would guess capital letters on
average are slightly more ink than lower case letters. I would
guess that in a game show type setting hoping to win 32,000 dollars.
Huh. If Superman and Lois Lane are married does that mean Lois Lane
now knows who Superman is? Also is it technically Lois Land and
Clark Kent are married? When Lois Lane goes around town with her
husband is it Superman or Clark Kent that people are getting. I
could look into this but why bother when I can just speculate and then stop
caring enough before I come to an answer. Must be Clark Kent.
Is she was married to Super Man they'd be like how did you meet? Oh
at the paper? WHEN YOU WERE CLARK KENT?!?! THE JIG IS UP WE
FIGURED OUT WHO YOU ARE YOU JERK. Something along those lines.
Anyway. What's the worst that could happen if we
knew Superman was Clark Kent. Nothing! If anything Clark Kent
would just get treated with A LOT more respect. That's the only
consequence I can think of! What else is going on. Hmm.
Not a lot of people named Clark these days. Possibly not a lot
of people named Clark ANY days? Okay that was a snooze.
TRUE but a snooze. What about a Clark Bar. The exception that
proves the rule. Also what the Hell is a Clark Bar. It's
possible they haven't made Clark Bars since the 1950's. Better LTURQ.
Peanut Butter and Taffy. Well that sounds disgusting. What
else is going on. Hmm. If Clark Kent gets treated with more
respect because people know he's Superman, would Superman get treated with
SLIGHTLY less respect because they know he's Clark Kent? Hey I
knew Clark Kent and he was a jerk. Now I think Superman is a jerk too.
It goes both ways is the point! Just like Superson.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
Does Superman still live in the 1940's. I feel like Superman
originally lived in the 1940's. Possibly because he debuted in the
1940's. I can't imagine a Superman living and working in the world of
today. Oh well what can ya do. If I thought I was free of
errant head hair around my body yesterday before bathing, I'm REALLY sure of
it now! So I got that going for me. Anyway I think you SHOULD
clog your drain with a little bit of hair each day. That way it GETS
USED to it. So if you ever clog it with too much one day it'll know how to
handle it! Why. Why did I have to say that. I
thought of it sometime yesterday to say. During entry? After
entry? I don't know when or why but I thought it and now I have to say
it! That's life I guess. Also maybe I want to clog
my drain. That way I can take baths! Otherwise the bathwater
would never accumulate you idiots. Impossible!
Last paragraph of the act. VERY Wonderful!
I lost track of whether I said anything the last 4 paragraphs. I feel
like I talked about Superman for a while and the rest is a blur. Oh
I see. Just looked Up The Screen A Bit and saw, "Peanut Butter and
Taffy." It wasn't a joke but it provided a public service!
Now the public knows to never get Clark Bars. Maybe the Clark Bar
only lived in the 1940's with Superman but JUST IN CASE it's still around.
Maybe you should be giving mini Clark Bars out to trick or treaters.
And then after they say Trick Or Treat you hand it to them and
devilishly laugh THE TRICK IS THE TREAT!!! And then move on
with the rest of your day. Something along those lines. Anyway
the great news is its time to cleanse myself. I'll be back in a little
Look I'm Almost Done Here
What's going on friends. Got a whole lotta day to look forward to
after this. Looking forward to day is fun! Then the day is much
less fun. Also not so much recalibrating lately! Recalibrating
has been replaced by just Looking Forward. Whatever happens'll happen.
I don't calibrate it so much! Anyway today I learned my lesson and
squeezed out half the amount of shampoo as I've been doing before.
Still probably too much! Oh well live and learn. Presumably.
I've lived a fair amount and learned a little. Presumably I will live
even more and possibly learn more, too! I feel like I've unlearned a
lot, too. Sure I learn as life continues to go on. But it's
offset pretty evenly with forgetting things, finding out things I thought
were wrong without them being replaced by right things, and/or learning new
incorrect things. So basically it's a wash.
Yeah! What the Hell. William Shatner
successfully Took Off In Rocket and then it just fell back down to
the Earth and that was it? That's not going into space!
That's NOTHING. Either way I'm happy for him that he's not dead
yet but I am NOT impressed with this, "Going To Space." I don't think
it counts at all! And it matters what I think counts and doesn't
count! I am the authority on What Counts! Gotta be an
authority on something! I CAN'T BELIEVE I started going into
this post season a week ago thinking I might be rooting for Them Atlanta
Braves. Now I realize I was wrong and can't fathom what I was
thinking! WHAT JERKS is the point I'm trying to make. I
forget why. I think part of it was hearing and seeing the tomahawk
chop. Both because it's racist and also it just reminded me oh
right these are THOSE jerks gotcha. I wasn't placing the 2021
Atlanta Braves with The Atlanta Braves of the last few decades. Now I
see IT'S THE SAME TEAM. Not a fan!
What else is going on. For people who didn't like
American Indians, Sports Teams of the 19th and 20th century sure loved
NAMING THEMSELVES after them. Why would they choose to identify as
Indians or Braves or Redskins if they didn't admire them indigenous tribes
to some extent? I think this is an underreported aspect of the story!
No I don't. But the point is I Said It and now we all get to
move on with our lives. Gonna take a nice short break between Act and
Walk. Not a big midlength break like between 45 minutes and an hour.
More like between thirty minutes and 45 minutes. Also for some reason
I am going back and forth between using Digits and Words. Go figure!
You can count on me for some CRAZY Stuff! Like going back and forth
between digits and words. What will I think of next. What
do you mean next. I haven't thought of anything in weeks!
Penultimate paragraph. I got an e-mail alert for
some reason that crazysheet.com is up for sale! Which this
website used to be. Then I stopped paying for the domain! Got
snatched up by some Fantasy Football Website Enterprise. Now they're
selling it apparently! It was listed at 2,999 dollars. A
little out of my price range! I'd counter offer with 2,999 NOTHINS.
I don't want it anymore! I'm fine with .net and that's just the way it is.
If anything you have to PAY ME 3000 dollars for it. Wait no.
I'd accept FIVE dollars. I won't go any lower than that, though!
That's where I draw some sort of line or something I forget exactly what I
was talking about. What was the first candy bar ever eaten in space.
My guess? Hershey Bar! Standard chocolate bar. You
wanna go with something uncomplicated for First Candy Bar In Space.
That's not funny or interesting. It's just TRUE.
Last paragraph of the day! Wonderful. I
wonder if William Shatner gave an interesting speech before or after his
Space Flight. My guess is probably not. He's 90 and presumably
can't muster up anything other than mumbling. At 90 you're past the
age of Speaking Coherent Words! Oh well that's life. What
else is going on. I'm sure he's still mumbling incoherently in his
same famous weird speech pattern style, though! Ah.
Wonderful. I would think he'd be disqualified from being an
astronaut for that alone. This guy talks in a weird rhythm
sometimes. Not sure we want that kind of risk In Space. NEXT.
I dunno. Also I know Star Trek says space is the final frontier, but I
wouldn't be surprised if we find out there's even more frontiers after
space. Great. Whatever. The entry is over!
I'll be back tomorrow.
October 12, 2021
Someone's Got To Do It
What's going on friends. Cut my hair last night! By which I mean
my Dad cut my hair 90% and I cut my hair 5%. The other 5% was some
sort of ghost. But then I shaved myself 100%! Also I did the
set up and clean up 80%. Also 100% of the hair was mine. Also I
lived in my Dad's house but I feel at this point the house is 25% mine.
Huh. Anyway pretty short haircut! Last night I was happy
with how it was even enough and presentable, but upset with how short.
Today? Not bad! Nice Neat Haircut. Also I didn't get hair
all over the house! And if I did not my problem anymore!
The point is that's a paragraph. I cut my hair. GOOD STUFF.
Hmm still time to salvage this paragraph. My dad accidentally threw
out small brush that you brush the haircutting apparatus with to get out
loose hair in the garbage. He had me go through the garbage to get it!
Uncharacteristic of him! Usually he's a neat freak. Not this
time! Gotta get mini-brush from the garbage! But it all worked
out in the end because I Retrieved It. Presumably washed it in the
sink as well as my hands. Can't say for certain, though!
Anyway, great. Now I don't have to do that ever
again for a few months at least. Some nice baseball games going
on today. Three! All of them could be deciding games in the
series! That'll show the losing team if they lose! Show them
real good! Show them that their season is over and whatnot.
Maybe some of their players can play in Winterball somewhere.
MAYBE. Where do they play Winterball. I want to say some
Latin American country. Let's LTURQ. VENEZUELA.
DOMINICAN REPUBLIC. MEXICO. VENEZUELA AGAIN. PUERTO RICO.
NOT CUBA. That settles that. Good luck to any American who
wants to play there. Language barrier is too restricting!
BEISBOL? WHAT THE HELL IS THAT? That sort of thing.
Because not only do Americans not speak Spanish, but they are particularly
Wait a second I'm an American! Hmm
interesting counter-point. What else is going on. In The Day
After Tomorrow we can play baseball in America. Because it's warmer!
Baseball Weather! Anyway. Any thought go into making a sequel
called TOMORROW. My guess? No not any serious
discussion. Maybe someone like me has proposed it but hopefully
they don't take people like me seriously at all. For their sake!
Also for MY sake. If they're taking people like me seriously, then
what do they need me for. They already got these other people
like me. I'm A Redundant! Oh well that's life. I
assume Friday After Next was a Wayans Bros. Movie parodying The Day
After Tomorrow. Either that or an Ice Cube Mike Epps vehicle.
Movies aren't vehicles. With the possible exception of Gran Torino.
I made that joke in roughly 2018. Something 90% like that at least.
Oh well live and learn. Other exceptions-- CHRISTINE, THE BATMOBILE,
etc. There was a movie called The Batmobile. I feel very
strongly about this! Gotta imagine there's 2-3 other well known movies
named after the main character which is a car. Hmm. Oh
what about that Racing Car movie. Days of Thunder. I imagine one
of the cars was named Days Of Thunder?? Ugh. I'll think
about this over the rest of the entry and keep you updated.
Yeah! APOLLO 13. I'll accept it!
Anyway. TAXI. The Jimmy Fallon/Queen Latifah vehicle.
OKAY time to move on. Then again moving on would require me to
think of a new topic. Sounds tough. But important to do!
Okay with my shave. Pretty close shave! Not a 100% shave but
certainly a 85, 90% shave. Which is perfect EXCEPT for the fact it
means my facial hair will accumulate that much quicker than if it was 100%.
Maybe I can shave every week like a weekly adult man. I
wouldn't put it past me! So I got that going for me. The Red Sox
have eliminated the Tampa Bay Devil Rays from the 2021 playoffs!
WOW. Too bad for the Devil Rays! I hope they're all on
Suicide Watch for the next few weeks. At least up until and through
the World Series. Anyway. American League Championship Series
may be Red Sox versus White Sox. RED VERSUS WHITE? THIS IS
COLUMBUS DAY/INDIGENOUS PEOPLE'S DAY ALL OVER AGAIN.
Ugh! A POSITIVE Ugh. Coffee
after this paragraph. Watched the updated version of The Carrie over
the last two days. Okay stuff! It's a PUN. Because women
CARRY children in their bellies per my understanding. And THIS VERSION
starts with Carrie's mother giving birth to Carrie. So it SUGGESTS
carrying child in your stomach. Wonderful. Also she can
Carrie Things through telekinesises. Doesn't even need to bother
holding books or putting a book bag around her back. Just telekinesis
it here and there wherever she goes. WOW how convenient!
Anyway what else is going on. Also what's so bad with getting covered
with pigs' blood. Take a shower! Not that big a deal! No
reason you have to kill everybody. If you're gonna kill everybody you
need a SLIGHTLY better reason! That's my official position.
What else is going on. Carrie is kind of
outdated. This is 50 years ago! These days if a kid wants to kill
everyone at school they don't need telekinesis all they need is some guns.
Also there's no STAKES to killing all the kids in school. We're
desensitized to it! We just accept that it will happen every now and
again! Anyway what else is going on. Imagine all the GOOD
you can do with telekinesis. Off the top of my head Free Carnival
Rides. Make some sort of ferris wheel just powered by your own
thoughts. HELP people. Yep that's the main way I can think of
helping people. Free Transparent Ferris Wheel. You've got MY
attention! I said it. To myself. Of course my attention
is there. Yep. Not sure how safe this ferris wheel is.
You break Carrie's concentration just a little bit and everyone might fall
to their death! I dunno. IT depends on how carefully
Carrie must concentrate. Maybe once she sets it into motion she can
just wander off and do something else. We don't KNOW because she never
Seventh paragraph! Carrie is like
WHY WON'T PEOPLE LIKE ME. BETTER KILL THEM. She should have
gone in with a positive attitude from the start. HELP people you idiot.
Anyway great we're gettin' decently deep into the entry. I can, "Dig,"
that! Did I mention the Red Sox will face the White Sox, or did I
start that sentence and then lose track of what Iw as saying and started
saying something else. OH I SAID IT. Red versus white.
Indigenous versus Colonizers. Now its all coming back to me.
What else is going on. I wanted to root for the White Sox for some
reason but I'm just not excited about their players! There's Jose
Abreu The Slugger BUT He's not overweight like I always imagined him.
I want a slugger to be slightly overweight! He's relatively normal
body type! NO THANK YOU. Possibly a little on the chubby
side for an athlete, hard to tell, but either way NOT ENOUGH.
Ugh. NOT A POSITIVE UGH. Not a
wholly negative UGH either. Somewhere in the middle.
Great. Gotta imagine I weigh less without all that hair.
We're talking maybe a tenth of an ounce. WOW that's like THREE
grams or something. Per my understanding. Not negligible at
all! If Jose Abreu was a tenth of an ounce and/or like three grams
heavier MAYBE JUST MAYBE I'd be more on board with him. What
else is going on. My Mom is trying to peer pressure me into making
and/or having communal pasta soon. Normally FINE LET'S MIX IT UP I'M
OKAY WITH THAT. But NOT NOW. Spoiler Alert-- I still have a
Super Market Made deal which is half pasta for this week. Maybe
next week with the communal pasta okay? NOT NOW! A little TOO
MUCH inside info there? I feel if I don't elaborate any further on
Mealtalk this isn't giving the whole ballgame away.
I read the scores of yesterday MLB Playoff Games on
google. They gave the whole ballgame away. GREAT JUST
WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR. Ninth paragraph! New Jacket came
yesterday! Presumably sweatshirt jacket! Haven't looked at it
yet but presumably I will today. My interest is palpable! If
interest can be palpable. I feel like there's a solid 2/3rds shot
interest can be palpable. I just looked up exact definition of
palpable on google. Now I feel like there's a solid 85% chance
interest can be palpable! WOW this keeps getting better and better!
Just had a brief half a second thought okay now I'll LURQ on google what
my new jacket looks like! Then I realized oh that's in real
life. Live and learn! Is palpable related to pulmonary!
I feel like your heart is palpable when it pumps blood or something.
This is probably wrong but it is TRULY how I half way sort of imagined the
word definition. Also SPOILER ALERT when I said pulmonary I meant
to do with the heart not lungs. That's why I said when it pumps
blood. Basically there's nine things in this paragraph that are
wrong. That's a lot for a single paragraph!
Last paragraph of the act. Wonderful. Good
chance I'll spend a decent amount of the day watching The Major League
Baseball. It's halfway entertaining enough! What else is going
on. CHUCKY TV series is tonight! Along with Spin Off of George
Romero films! Which I just learned about a day or two ago!
Either way I'm definitely not expecting something on par with the original
three Living Dead Films but if his estate is engaged with it to whatever
degree it should hopefully be PRETTY good. By which I mean
pretty zombies. Attractive zombies! With things hanging out in
all the right places. Boobs I meant. Those are the main
things that could be hanging out that I would be into. Butts too I
guess. Anyway. I was thinking about it and I think Child's
Play may have been a trendsetter re: having R Rated Horror Films halfway
geared towards a young children audience. It has CHILD right in the
name of the title! Must be good for children! And then we
realized ALL horror movies past and present are ALSO good for children.
So basically good for them? I might have talked about that before.
I'll talk about it again! Well maybe not again, at this point 2 or
3 times is enough. The point is I'll be back in a little
That's Where You're Wrong
Hello friends. I've talked about being upset about how much MLB
Players turn out to be. Sometimes they're too fat! Sometimes
they're not fat enough! ALSO I've talked about everything else
I just talked about before. But besides all that it's been a real
worthwhile entry. Anyway gonna take a bath and/or a shower soon!
Gotta make sure all hair is off my body by then. Can't have hair
clogging up drains! That'd negatively impact my life somewhere down
the line! Then again having to spend 30 seconds making sure there's no
leftover hair on me is gonna negatively impact my life RIGHT NOW.
Lots of work! So it's an interesting trade off and I'm gonna have to
make a decision on this pretty quickly. Hmm. I'd be on
board with some communal French Toast. Now you're talking my language!
EXCEPT for how half the loaf of bread we got for it will go to waste.
Other than that it's a worthwhile enterprise!
Hmm. I wish I had some French Toast
RIGHT NOW. Maybe I Do! That's for me to know and you to
never find out. Dunno why that's such a good retort for kids to say
about things. That's for me to know and you to find out!
That's not so bad for The Other Guy! You're gonna find out eventually!
Pretty good stuff! Most people will NEVER know about this
situation at all. Just take a breath and move on with your life until
you inevitably Find Out. Then enjoy yourself You Now Know!
Ugh. Also haven't you ever heard that ignorance is bliss.
This guy Who Knows might suffer from his knowledge. You're doing
better off without being troubled by this horrifying truth. Ugh.
Look Ignorance is PRETTY Good but I dunno about bliss.
Might have made that joke before. Either way it's an important point.
Ignorance certainly has a lot going for it but bliss is overselling
it A BIT. YEAH!
Third paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
Why would I have hair covering my body. I just got my hair cut.
I have LESS hair than I used to. Now you're saying I have hair all
over the place-- when I didn't before? You've got it all backwards my
friend! What else is going on. First baseball game of the day is
at 2:07. AMAZING. When I was a kid games would start at
:05's or :10's. I guess in today's modern world they're like yeah
we're not happy with those better split the difference. ALSO round
down to :07 instead of up to :08. OH I KNOW WHY. Because it IS
right in the middle at :07 and thirty seconds. Which APPEARS just like
:07. OH OKAY now that makes a lot of sense I get it now. SO
that's that I guess. Then again there's gonna be a lot of angry people
who tune in at :07 and No Seconds and are enraged when the game doesn't
start for thirty seconds. Well that's a consequence I guess
they decided they can live with.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! I don't believe
it! I'd eat some communal pancakes. Maybe order some chocolate
chip morsels before hand. Then put them in a glass. Then guzzle
them down. Then later in the week eat some pancakes. Hmm
seems to check out. Then again who has time to make pancakes when
you can just guzzle down pancake mix. That's what a lot of people
tried when they saw Rocky guzzle down uncooked eggs in a glass. Hey
this must work for all breakfasts. Lot of copycat Breakfast
Guzzlers that year is the point! Anyway I don't care how bad or
vaguely good enough that may be. It's time to move on with my lives.
Gotta make sure the chocolate chip morsels don't clog up the drain in my
bathtub. How would that happen. Look I don't need to
justify my personal life to you. Get off my back about it and whatnot!
Last paragraph of the act! It's about time!
Gotta imagine chocolate chips are meltable. If something melts it
can't clog up things. Over time water will completely erode it!
As it will everything. If you give anything enough time,
water will erode it! Except for plastic! And possibly 80% of
other things! What else is going on. Must be hard to predict
when baseball game will start. What if the National Anthem goes long?
Not sure what that accomplishes. Only making me that much
closer to the end of the paragraph. Off the top of my head that's
literally the only thing it accomplishes. ALSO FIGURATIVELY.
Great. Great! Of course Rocky has to guzzle down eggs. He
can't COOK eggs, he's got things to do! Like run around town.
What a jerk. He thinks he's better than us? We don't have to
put up with this! Wonderful. I'll be back in a little bit.
You're O.K. In My Book
Hey! Time to wrap up the entry. Man I must have a lot in store
to say. Only 60% of which has been said before! Let's get it
goin'. Didn't see any hair at all going into bath or coming out of
bath or IN bath. So I got that going for me. Also I pumped too
much shampoo into my hand! I needed maybe a third of this amount of
shampoo. Oh well now I know for later. Also that's
another great reason to have short hair. Save on shampoo!
Then again you're LOSING money by having to cut your hair more often.
So it all comes out in the wash. Not if you're lucky like me!
If it's coming out in the wash, it being your hair, then you're in for a
world of trouble down the line. Amazing. Are we supposed to
shampoo facial hair. I've never done that. Maybe I should have
been. Oh well too late now. Might have already made that
question-observation on this website seven times before. YET STILL
NO ONE ANSWERS ME.
Cool. Gonna take maybe a half hour break
between Entry and Walk. Long enough to accomplish SOMETHIN.
Like a 22 minute TV Show Episode. Hmm. Doesn't get much
more of an accomplishment than watching A television set program! I
talk about that all the time. Watching TV is the most productive thing
I do. I'm not proud of it. I'm a little proud of it!
I watch TV better than other people, I feel. Why shouldn't I take
pride in that? What else is going on. It's good I wasn't covered
in hair because it'd be a hassle and a half, but I do feel a bit let down
that I didn't get to experience that. It would have been a problem but
a FUN problem. I'd have to use my problem solving abilities to figure
it out! Now all my problem solving abilities are going to waste!
And if I don't solve a problem soon they're gonna start to stagnate and I'll
eventually lose those powers for future problems. Now THAT'S a
Ugh. I saw there's speculation the Mets could
trade their top prospect for another team's general manager.
Gotta imagine if they do that, as soon as he's officially a Met, he'd be
like okay first thing I'm gonna do is inform you YOU JUST DID THE WRONG
THING. RIGHT OFF THE BAT I'M NOT PLEASED. We gotta please
General Manager! If he's not happy his work will suffer. And if
his work suffers ALL of our works suffer. Huh. Then again
he might be happy about it if you look at it the other way. As his
final act as GM for the other team, Milwaukee, he gets them a top prospect
and all he had to give up Was Him. It's a tough conundrum.
He might have a conflict of interest with himself. Who he wants to
benefit depends on how he chooses to look at it! The ball is in his
court and whatnot. Whatever. This paragraph is solidly OVER.
Penultimate paragraph. Now if we're talking
about trading the top prospect for Milwaukee's STADIUM, I'm all ears!
AND of course we keep Citifield. We just not have a bonus backup
arena. In Milwaukee. Fair trade! Ugh. What else
is going on. I want a stadium with a retractable roof. I
feel like I've been missing out by watching baseball games without there
being a roof. I think there being a roof would be fun! Great.
This is great stuff. Also what's so great about this Potential GM
From Milwaukee. He's just another jerk. WOW he went to college
and worked in baseball for a few years. Probably got some sort of dumb
name and/or haircut. NOT IMPRESSED! So there's that to consider.
How's William Shatner going. Is he in space and/or dead yet.
Better LTURQ. Not until tomorrow I think. All he has to
do is live another 24 hours! I don't think they'll still send him up
to space if he's a corpse by then. JUST KEEP IT GOING ANOTHER DAY YOU
CAN DO THIS.
Last paragraph of the day! Wonderful. Then
again that's gotta be a mile stone at SOME point. First corpse
in space. What else is going on. Maybe that's how zombies are
made! We won't know until we test it out. Hmm maybe I should
volunteer to be the corpse. Something to consider. Nah
they'd want someone with more of an Air Force background or something.
What else is going on. What's the next chore I have to do. Might
be nothing until accepting Super market delivery Friday morning!
Wow that's roughly TWO AND A HALF DAYS of nothing. I've heard of
Two and a Half MEN but Two and a half Days?!?! What will they think of
next! Hopefully better stuff. That'd be my instinct of
what to hope for. Anyway hey the entry is over. I'll be back
October 11, 2021
I'm Busy Writing Titles
Hello friends. What's going on and whatnot. Today is Monday!
Got Sprite Zero Sugar going. WELL THAT'S ALL I GOT. I'm
continuing to lose weight vertically. Instead of gradually becoming
less thick around my belly the normal, horizontal way it's condensing into a
vertical roll of fat! GOOD STUFF. I like a body that mixes
things up. I'm one of a kind! Well if this is happening
to me surely it happens to other people. I dunno about that!
I feel like 80% of my life Surely Doesn't Happen To Other People.
Pretty unique life circumstances I got going on! Mostly negative
things BUT it's fun just to have a unique life. So it evens out is the
point. OH NO I'm up to the final season of The Twilight Zone!
You know what that means. ONLY 200 EPISODES LEFT. It's
weird to have watched all The Twilight Zonoes. Always kinda felt like
there were unlimited episodes when you see it on TV now and then. Now
I will have seen all of them? I'm Scared Hold Me.
What else is going on. MLB Playoffs going on.
I like the HOMERUNS. Then again too many homeruns cheapen the home
runs. Hmm. I feel like if I knew every stolen base attempt would
be successful I'd like them, but I HATE an unsuccessful stolen base.
YOU JUST RAN YOUR WAY RIGHT OUT OF AN INNING WELL DONE YOU IDIOT.
Not worth the risk! I don't mean the risk of running yourself out of
an inning. I mean the risk of Upsetting Me The Viewer Of The Baseball
Game. You don't wanna get on my bad side! Hmm I don't have
sides. There's 360 Degrees Of Me. No singular sides at all!
In 40 Shades of Gray I assume they spend roughly 3 minutes describing each
shade. Otherwise I may not know what that movie is about.
What do you mean it's fifty shades of gray. I only know of 40 shades
of gray. I guess that's why I'm only 80% into that kind of sex
stuff. Now it all makes sense.
What else is going on. I can only think of
one shade of gray. Two or three tops! Fifty is definitely
pushing it. Yep the movie is all about PUSHING in Sex.
Exploring the fetish of pushing your partner during sex. Hmm.
Sounds fun. Real Fun! I GOTTA GO FOR A MINUTE. TAKE CARE
OF BUSINESS. Anyway I'm back. I never left to take care
of business. That was just some clever misdirection. I don't
get Big Momma's House. I've seen this movie. The house is
a VERY Minor Character. Big Momma is the star of this movie!
Yep. Sure. Not sure why that was important to bring up here.
I SAW BIG MOMMA'S HOUSE PLAYING ON TV YESTERDAY. FOLLOWED BY BIG
MOMMA'S HOUSE TWO. Also I believe the sequel doesn't even take
place in Big Momma's House at all! What even IS life.
I've talked about all this before. Gray Shades. Big Momma's
house. Hey how abut this 50 Shades of Other Colors. Why
settle on Gray. NOPE. Would have been better off without
that! Oh well live and learn.
Penultimate paragraph of paragraphs without coffee!
Gotta look for the little things in life to celebrate. Hmm.
What's the littlest things I can think of. GAME BOY. I
don't have one on me to celebrate but I guess I could just celebrate them in
theory! Also 30 years later you can't get away with calling a portable
gaming system a Game Boy. Game CHILD is more like it. Or
make game boys AND game girls. That's one way to go. Which is
great because hermaphrodites will want to buy both. Is
hermaphrodites still the PC term for someone whose both. Can't think
of another one off the top of my head. Either way the last game boy I
had was a Game Boy Color which is already ahead of the game and pretty
progressive for its time. Because I assume it was mainly marketed to
People Of Color, right? That's where the name comes from?
YEAH. Almost a joke! And almost phrased in a halfway decent
enough way. WOW almosts? Now we're talking!
Fifth paragraph. Talked about Game Boy
before. I'll talk about it again. Unfortunately.
What else is going on. Haircut tonight! Gotta find where my hair
cutting apparatus is and plug it in several hours beforehand. Oh well
live and learn. Can't someone just scalp me. It's easier!
Gotta imagine that's accurate. Don't gotta be careful to get scalping
just right. You can scalp someone in 20 seconds, right? That's
how I imagine scalpings. Just get it over with. Also what do
Scalped People Do. Can't have your brain exposed for the rest of your
life. It'll get dirty! And your brain is already dirty enough
you dirty little freak. That's right I'm calling you out! For
your pervertedness, etc. What else is going on. Forget
scalping. Might as well just kill me. That way I never
have to do anything again ever! ALRIGHT time to CHILLAX.
I think I meant that as a halfway original joke but it's
a very common refrain among adults. I'd RATHER BE DEAD THAN HAVE TO
HAVE THIS LIFE. I hear it all the time! Literally 100% of
people I know have said that out loud time and again. FUNNY STUFF.
I've never felt that. Even when I hated life as I have on occasion.
Still don't wanna be DEAD. That'd be the worst! Anyway
what else is going on. My Dad alerted me they're sending William
Shatner into space. And I believed him. Then as I walked
upstairs I started thinking maybe that was a joke he heard somewhere and
mistook it for reality? I'm gonna say solid 95% chance he heard
accurately. Lemme LTURQ. YEP IT'S REAL. My Dad is
on top of things! He knows what's going on out there in the world!
And BEYOND the world as it is. Anyway. I assume the plan is
to bring William Shatner back from Space too. That'd be a deal
breaker for me. I'm only going if you promise to bring me back!
What else is going on. I guess William
Shatner is gonna be the first person to Perform Acting in space. EVER.
He's going down in history for that! Hmm what kinda monologue is
good for him to do. I don't know any monologues. Oh right
the Vagina Ones. He can do those I guess. I dunno!
People would be really upset if Shatner Rocket Ship explodes. Oh no
we lost AN ACTOR this is way worse than losing astronauts. I'VE SEEN
THIS GUY ON THE TV A BUNCH OF TIMES. What else is going on.
I haven't seen William Shatner on the TV that many times. More times
than the average person, sure. Either way. What is
William Shatner's job in Rocket Ship if not acting. Gotta imagine
they're giving him SOME sort of responsibility to make himself
useful. Right? Maybe not! He's just a tourist. I
dunno if I'm being a tourist in a rocket ship I'm gonna want at least A
PRETEND Job. Even if it's totally fake and I know it. They
say hey mimic pressing these buttons while the rocket goes off! It
will go off without you but you get to pretend. I'd do that.
Pressing buttons? Now I HOLD ALL THE CARDS.
I dunno what else is going on. It's more
likely to die in a rocket ship on the way to the launch site than during
takeoff itself. Hmm. Eighth paragraph! We're always
talking about faster trains so why can't we have rocket trains. Gotta
imagine if we implement rocketry with ground transportation we can really
get where we're going quickly. Maybe TOO QUICKLY. No wait
not too quickly. Maybe not quickly enough! Wait no not not
quickly enough. Maybe too quickly. What The Hell. What
am I Talking about. Oh right Train Rocketry. Makes sense.
Why would a rocket powered vehicle need to be on tracks. For
STYLE and SAFETY. Ugh. If you're not following
pre-existing train tracks you're gonna risk crashing your Rocket Train into
something or SOMEONE. And at the speed we're talking about
we're talking Total Destructions.
YEAH. William Shatner? More like
William SHITner. I'm calling you out! Anyway I may have
never seen a complete episode or movie of A Star Trek. Wait.
I think I saw a Star Trek movie in theaters roughly 2010-2013.
WOW THAT'S A LONG MOVIE. Amazing. Either way it starts off
their on another planet. And they're in a ship or something. And
they're like can't let other planet inhabitants see us it will confuse
them at this point in their history development. Yep! Based
on that you can determine which Star Trek I saw. I envy you.
They're doing a Space Ship on The Day Formerly Known As Columbus Day?
Amazing! He was an explorer or something and now so is William
Shatner. Are they doing the Space Ship today? Better
LTURQ. Eh I don't feel like it. Just let it be known
Maybe It's Today Maybe It Isn't. If you care so much look it up
yourself you idiot.
Last paragraph of the act! Amazing.
COLUMBUS SAILED ACROSS THE OCEAN. What have Indigenous People ever
done. Hmm. They LIVED. Not impressed! I've
lived my entire life and it was a breeze. Never sailed across the
ocean! That's something to commemorate! Anyway. HEY
Indigenous people crossed the ancient land bridge from Russia to Alaska.
YEAH A LONG TIME AGO. What have they done since. NOTHIN'.
Anyway what else is going on. Knee hurts a little bit. Right
knee! Been doing lots of walking. Maybe not as Ancient
Indigenous People but my fair share! Lots of push ups and sit ups.
Somewhere along the line my right knee has had enough! Oh well I
can power through it. Not too bad! YEAH. If
we're using rocket ships for trains maybe we should use trains for rocket
ships. It'll take a while to lay the tracks to the moon but once we do
it's SAFE and PRACTICAL. Sure great that'll do it for now.
Be back soon!
You Know What I Say
Maybe I do. Hey time to write five paragraphs. Got some
Coca Cola Zero going on. When it's Coca it's a, "C," in the
middle but when it's Coke it's a, "K." WHO COMES UP WITH THIS
STUFF. Presumably Colonel Sanders. He's the guy who made
Coca Cola right? I can't think of anything else he might have been in
charge of. COLON EL? Well if you eat enough chicken it'll
get to YOUR colon! Even if you eat a miniscule amount of
chicken. Gotta imagine that'll reach your colon. Maybe you
just pee it out if it's that small amount of chicken. I don't know how
your body works! Frankly I don't wanna know that much! Maybe a
little bit but I can survive without it! Gotta imagine there's some
people who order fried chicken and just eat the fried breading and throw out
the chicken. WOW. Probably some multiple of TWENTIES of
those people in America alone! We're talkin sixty? Eighty?
A hundred and twenty???!!!??
Amazing. I might have said that before.
About throwing out Chicken and eating Fried. Not my fault
that it's a topic that occurs to me so often. Well maybe it is
kind of my fault. That checks out too. Four baseball
games going today? That's too much! I'm gonna feel peer
pressured by Baseball TV all day to watch baseball TV. Why
should I? There's SCRIPTED and SEMI-SCRIPTED things I could be
watching. Not so much semi-scripted things. Everything I
may watch off the top of my head is FULLY scripted. Or at least 90%
scripted which ROUNDS UP. So I got THAT going for me.
What if there's a huge baseball conspiracy that the games are all scripted.
Oh no I'm scared hold me. You'd think if they're scripting the
games they'd make them more interesting. You'd be WRONG. By
making the games still uninteresting they're throwing us off their scent.
VERY clever. Anyway great just great.
Hmm. Has anyone ever thought to do an offshoot of
professional wrestling that is actual competition wrestling. But they
still keep the spirit of having characters and storylines and all that fun
stuff. But they actually have real wrestling competitions!
That sounds like a MILLION DOLLAR IDEA waiting to happen. Wow a
million dollars? Well for me at least. I think I should
get a flat rate of a million dollars Right Here Right Now from whoever wants
to take the reins. Sounds fair. VERY fair. Also yes
it has to be somewhat more violent and intense than regular wrestling.
SOMEWHAT. Anyway what else is going on. Also every match
is A Cage Match. SURE they don't utilize the cage because what
would that have to do with Regular Wrestling. But it's still there
for some reason! No one is really sure why!
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
A cage match is when they put a cage around the ring. Presumably so
wrestlers could climb it. And then presumably jump on their opponents
from the top of the cage. That's what I'd do at least. Anyway
moving on. I think there are some cage matches where the conceit is
you have to escape the cage and the first person to get out of the cage
wins. How amusing. But for some reason they spend 20
minutes wrestling with each other. You'd think as soon as the bell
rings they each start climbing the cage. Nope! They gotta spend
20 minutes doing Piledrivers. HEY THAT MAKES SENSE.
Before you climb the cage you wanna make sure your opponent is FATIGUED and
can't climb the cage himself. That way you can climb the cage with
less pressure on you because your opponent is lying in the ring, Completely
Piledrived, and you can COAST to the top of the cage! Oh Okay Now
It Makes Sense.
Last paragraph of the act! It's been five or
ten minutes. Has anyone decided to pay me 1 million dollars yet for
Real Wrestling Idea? Oh this hasn't been published to the internet
yet. Gotta wait 5 or 10 minutes after publishing to the internet!
Hmm great I have something to look forward to then! Maybe
entrepreneurs hack into my computer and read the entries slightly before
other people can. In which case hey great what else is going on.
William Shatner is 90. He may be the first person to die from old age
in space. That's not a bad thing to be remembered for! Well
he'll be DEAD. Being dead is a bad thing to be remembered for for YOU
because you won't be able to bask in your memorableness. Too busy
being dead! Anyway great. I'll be back in a little bit!
There's Always Tomorrow
Presumably. Hey great what else is going on. Got some
Sprite Zeroe going on right now. Wow I keep going back and forth
between Coke Zero and Sprite Zero. If you know a better way to
drink your soda I'd like to hear it! What kind of idiot drinks all his
coke zero and then all his sprite zero. The biggest idiot in the
world, that's who. Got some CHORES coming up. Gotta bring Shower
Seat from one room into another soon. That will take upwards of a
minute! Gotta find Hair Cutting Apparatus and plug it in. That
will take an entire other minute potentially. JESUS CHRIST JUST
KILL ME. I'd be a privilege to be dead rather than live with all
this responsibility! Of having to do 90 seconds worth of things over
the next 8 hours. It's just not worth living in this scenario.
Hmm that was an entire paragraph. Gotta move shower
seat and find hair cutting apparatus. Good stuff! Now it's
time to move on, though. It's already spread to the beginning of this
paragraph and that's just plain too much! What else is going on.
Got coffee #2 going. Delicious! I decided to keep track of how
long it'll take me to finish Coffee Mate Bottle. To see how much I
actually use! I THINK it'll end up being pretty close to what I've
been approximating! GOOD NEWS. I'm RIGHT about something.
Not good news that it's less than I'd been approximating.
That'd be even GOODER news. But it's good news to know I was right
about something even if that something is terrible. Great.
No team has won their Division Series in MLB Playoffs yet? THIS IS
TAKING FOREVER. JUST KILL ME NOW. Hmm you should have killed
me last paragraph. If you haven't killed me By Now I'm not 100%
confident you'll EVER kill me. Great just great.
What else is going on. Is it legal to kill your
opponent in baseball. What if it's an accident! Gotta imagine
there's something in the rule book about that. Let's say you hit the
ball at an outfielder so hard it kills them. How do they score that
play. Maybe like a ground rule double? Umpire'll give you 2nd
base. That sounds like a fair compromise that both teams can agree to.
Yep. Gonna have a nice decent sized break between Entry and Next
Walk. I say that every day now! And it's true every day!
What a wonderful world and/or whatnot. Somehow I'm getting up at a
pretty consistent time each day. I set my alarm early. I snooze
once or twice. And then ultimately I end up settling for getting up
roughly 8:30 each day! Amazing. Should I start setting my
alarm for 8:30 then. No of course not. Then I'd start
getting up at 9:30 each day! AND THAT'S WAY TOO LATE. YEAH.
Penultimate paragraph. Also IN THE
MORNING. We're talking, "A.M." Which I believe stands for
AT MORNING. Hmm. What does AM Radio stand for. AT
MORNING RADIO that's easy. Better LTURQ. Both Real AM
and AM Radio. ANTE MERIDIEM. Latin for Before Noon. AMAZING.
We don't speak Latin anymore. What the Hell. How is this a
holdover from 2000 years ago. You'd think at some point
we would have started using a more modern language. Nope!
Okay now let's check out AM Radio. AMPLITUDE MODULATION.
Just as I suspected! If nothing else we all learned something this
paragraph. Except for those of you who already know. And
those of you who don't believe me. Gotta imagine a lot of people
have learned not to believe me when I say things. And thus they've
learned nothing from this paragraph. I pity them and/or you.
Last paragraph of the day! I don't believe
it. So much day left to do things with! I get excited about that
every day. Then every day is always a snooze. But this day may
be different! SO MANY BASEBALLS. Hopefully none.
That's a big part of why days lately have been a snooze! Wasting free
time on baseballs! I could be doing better re: Entertainment Choices!
What else is going on. I think you should get a triple if you kill an
outfielder with the baseball. You should be rewarded SOME way
at least. Ugh. HEY I JUST MOVED CHAIR. So if
nothing else I accomplished that. Uh oh If Nothing Else that's not
very much of an accomplishment for the day. SOMETHIN' I guess.
Better than being dead for my family! Then again if I was dead maybe
they wouldn't even NEED shower chair. Not sure how that works.
Either way the entry is over! Be back tomorrow.
October 10, 2021
Here Comes Some Decent
Hey friends! Time to write some more. It's Sunday Morning.
Otherwise known as The Day And Time My Bowling League Would Take Place.
Hmm. Got some oranged soda going on right now. Coffee
will come in a few paragraphs as always. Well we covered the
important stuff. Beverages. Bowling League. That's about
it off the top of my head! Anyway been watching That Twilight Zone
lately! I dunno if I just happened to hit a good streak of good
episodes, or if I'm just in the right headspace for it lately, but I'm
getting a kick out of 'em! I like the part where Rod Sterling is like
Hello friends. This guy is some guy. Plot gonna happen.
THIS is The Twilight Zone. Rod Sterling thinks he's so great.
He shows NO humility or self consciousness. Everything he says is
genius gold. WHAT AN ASSHOLE. Maybe his name is Rod
Serling. That's what google says. I ain't buyin' it!
Rod Serling writes every other episode too. WE
GET IT YOU'RE GREAT. Congratulations. NOW EASE UP A BIT.
Anyway. Got SNL to look forward to watching later! Yep.
I get to look forward to watching it! Maybe I'll watch it maybe I
won't. At some point though I will start to look forward to it.
Maybe a little bit later after this entry. I wonder if they'll do
Topical Humor. My guess? Probably! I wonder if
they'll do Tropical Humor. My guess? Anything's possible!
I'd live on a tropical island, sure. I'd have to get used to eating
Citrus Fruits. I feel like that's a big part of your diet on Tropical
Island. I could get the hang of that, sure. I could be WAY
off. Maybe NON citrus fruits. Forget exactly what citrus
fruits are and/or what fruits on tropical island are. Either way I
hope it's the GALAPAGOS island. That way I'll live to be 200!
I MAY not be understanding how Galapagos Island Works. I MAY have
made that exact same joke before. Oh well I enjoyed it anyway!
What else is going on. NATE SILVER came in
second in a World Series Of Poker Tournament. And I got the
impression he's playing in a bunch of them. Where is Nate Silver
getting all this money. Sounds like a scam. He should be
busy making Mathematical Models not playing games! And he shouldn't
have that much money! I smell a scam! Or concurrent multiple
scams! Anyway. I dunno. I dunno why that's
supposed to be funny. Good counter-point. It's not funny!
I don't get it either! Oh well that's life. Microsoft
FrontPage doesn't recognize Nate as a word. That's gotta be
demoralizing to Nates everywhere. Tough. Hmm.
There's the famous Simpsons scene where they take famous people's names and
make anagrams describing them. Nate. NEAT. Now I'm
smarter than Lisa! Who couldn't even think of one! I'M A SOLID
100% AHEAD OF HER WITH THIS ONE. Well I feel like a real genius now
oh boy do I.
Fourth paragraph. Go ahead and spend 7
seconds looking at Silver and seeing if you can come up with an
anagram of that. I did it! Well, 3 seconds. I didn't last
the whole seven seconds before giving up. I gave up after 3!
I got THINGS to do I can't spend that extra four seconds wasted.
Anyway what else is going on. Maybe I'm giving you too much credit to
assume you'll try to spend seven seconds working on Silver.
Maybe I'm giving you too little credit. Maybe I am giving you
just the right amount of credit. In which case I should become a
banker! Something to do with credit. I may not know how
banks and/or credits work! That's another good job-- working on the
credits of major motion pictures. Having to decide the font and speed
and order. My spin on it would be doing interesting fonts. Comic
Sans off the top of my head is one way to go. Fascinating.
Last paragraph before coffee! Also last
paragraph of the first 25% which is traditionally the most repetitive.
Based on the last few days at least. I feel like I repeat myself a lot
in these entries and it's all the more in the beginning of the entries.
At some point I get into a GROOVE and say HALFLY New Things. How would
World Series Of Poker respond to a competing casino hosting The Superbowl Of
Poker. My guess? Look into a lawsuit. Then
determine they have no grounds. Then make THEIR OWN Superbowl
of Poker. Then the other Superbowl of poker will look into a lawsuit.
Then determine they DO have grounds. And So The World Keeps On
Turning. What else is going on. Bankers have lots of money
because that's where money lives. At banks! Only logical that if
you're trying to think of the richest guy in town it'll be the guy in charge
of the place where money lives! Here come some coffee.
What was I talking about. Bankers. Oh
gotcha. Whoever has the responsibility of being the bank in
Monopoly probably should be getting a salary? In Monopoly you pick one
person to handle the money and whatnot. He should be getting an extra
200 dollars every trip around the board or something! Then again
even without that he's getting the privilege of being able to cheat more
easily. So that's his reward for doing the work. JUST LIKE
REAL BANKERS. I'm calling you out! Anyway what else is going
on. Baseball playoffs have been going on. I'm okay with that!
If the games want to be played and the players want to play them, it's all
for the best! Everyone wins in this scenario. Except for the
games that don't want to be played but MUST be played for symmetry with the
games that do want to be played an dare played. YEAH.
Seventh paragraph! I don't believe it!
Seventh paragraph out of 10 is solidly in the middle mathematically but IN
FEELING it feels like near the end. Interesting. That means
nothing. It means something to me! That was the inspiration
for saying it! Fair enough. Gonna have haircut tomorrow
night. It's gonna be a blast and a half. It will be a solid
chore but after 20-30 minutes it will be over and done with and I will look
in the mirror and be like whose that handsome devil in the mirror.
Uh oh. I see the devil in the mirror. Behind me maybe? He
only shows up in the mirror! Well at the very least he is handsome.
That sort of thing. There was a The Twilight Zone episode with A LADY
Devil. Guy sells his soul to someone we assume is the devil because
that's who you sell souls too AND she had Devil Horns. And she was a
lady! SOCIAL PROGRESSIVENESS. We've seen too much of Male
Devils about time we had a Female Devil!
Sure great what else. Everyone talk all the time about
Oh Maybe God Is A LADY. Well if you want that you also gotta
take The Devil being A Lady! You can't pick and choose! Get a
load of all this talk about God being A LADY. I don't know how to feel
about that! I'm all for Social Progressiveness but then again God
Doesn't Exist At All so you can see my predicament in thinking about this
Hot Button Issue. Then again maybe ladies do not exist???
Now that I think about it can I really say for sure I'm positive ladies
exist? My Mom! I see her all the time. She's a lady.
That's evidence #1. Is there a second piece of evidence? Hmm.
Dunno! Nothing conclusive off the top of my head. What else
is going on. The Wrestle mania of Poker. Is that a thing.
My guess? NOT AS OF THIS MOMENT.
Ninth paragraph already! And all I had to do was
Say Nothing Worthwhile. I dunno. I feel like I've said
FIVE .3 Worthwhile things. NOT BAD. NOT BAD AT ALL.
Hmm. In The Devil Wears Prada... does that imply a Female Devil?
Can Men wear Prada? Also What Is Prada? Better LTURQ.
Looks like they do at least mostly stuff only for Females. But
POSSIBLE they have some stuff that could be for men! The point is it
at least IMPLIES a Female Devil if not GUARANTEEING it. Anyway.
What else is going on. How could Christians say God Is A Woman.
God impregnated a lady. Ladies can't impregnate ladies! Not
biological ladies at least! CHECK AND MATE. Then again if Any
Lady Could Impregnate A Lady it's presumably Lady God. Lady God
can do anything she wants, she's god. Why not impregnate someone.
Hmm very interesting counter-point.
Last paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
Put my underwear on backwards this morning. I realized it right away!
Didn't correct it, though! Figured well I'm gonna take a bath in 3
or 4 hours. Gotta take em off then anyway. Might as well just
live with it backwards for a few hours. Whose got the time to take
them off and then put them back on now. So I got that going for
me. SURE I've already have to urinate half a dozen times and I had
lower underwear a bit instead of using the flap. That's life! If
I have to shit I can use the flap THAT WAY and suddenly I'm Coming Out On
Top in this scenario! Wonderful. Maybe we should have
flaps both ways in underwear. That way We Can Never Get It Wrong and
also that way We Can Pee And Poop Through Flaps At Once. Well maybe
not at once. But you get the idea. I'll be back in a little
This Is The Same Thing As Before
Well hello there! Time to write some more paragraphs. So far
today is going okay! Solidly Exactly The Same As Every Other Day.
I LIKE that. I've been enjoying life relatively this Era Of My
Life. Solid 6, 6.5 out of 10 Life! Anyway what else is going on.
I haven't said The First Thing that's going on. Oh right.
Hmm. Looking forward to watching SNL later today! Maybe watch An
Horror movie first was my first instinct. Wanna be spooked a little
bit after this entry. Then I realized SNL is spooky enough!
HEY this is what AMERICA is watching these days. Those are high
stakes! I'm anxious and worried for America. So that's
spooky! So it's a best of both worlds or something. What
worlds. Earth is presumably one world. What's the other.
I dunno off the top of my head SATURN? I'm a fan of Saturn.
Ring? CHECK. Moon that's possibly habitable? CHECK.
What else is going on. I can't wait to see their
sketch parodying Nate Silver sitting at a World Series Of Poker Final Table.
They're gonna get him good! What else is going on. ...WAIT A
SECOND. Nate Silver came in 2nd. Per his announcement on
Twitter. SILVER. THIS JERK GOT THE SILVER. Well
don't that beat all! I'd like to dwell on this some more but I have
nothing to add! Let's just soak it in for a few moments and when
you're ready go on ahead and start reading the next sentence. Got some
oranged soda going. Same as before! Well slightly different.
I drank the liquid I had before and now I Replaced it with new liquid.
MOVING ON. Desperately looking around the room for inspiration.
I tried looking around the corners of my mind but that got me nowhere.
Now I'm looking out into The Physical World. No luck there either.
Hmm maybe starting a new paragraph will get the juices flowing!
YEAH. When was the last time a Major League
player died halfway through a game. That's what I came up with?
Looking a round for 5 or 10 minutes fruitlessly and then I come up with
THAT? I'm not happy about it either! Then again it did get
the ball rolling so let's see if we can keep the ball rolling. Oh
no the ball is rolling away from us. We can't have that!
Better stop the ball from rolling so we can play with it some more. If
it rolls away too far at some point he ball ceases to be our ball. Hmm
what's the math philosophy equation for How Far A Ball Has To Be Away From
Us Where It Is No Longer Our Ball For All Intents And Purposes. My
guess? TWENTY SIX FEET. That's not an equation.
That's just a number. YEAH YOU'D THINK SO WOULDN'T YOU.
What else is going on. Oh right absolutely nothing.
Great! Solidly into the 14th paragraph of the
entry! That Feels As Far as the 7th paragraph into the first 10
paragraphs yet is also as close to the middle as it was... also... too..
same thing times two... Huh. Smelled a nice bagel while
re-filling soda downstairs. Toasted bagel! You can't smell
untoasted bagels. Maybe you can. Everything bagels. Salt
can be smelled even without being activated by cooking I feel. And/or
seeds of some sort. Salt is seeds. Salt Seeds. Not
sure what that accomplishes. Either way what else is going on.
Untoasted isn't a word apparently. Maybe nontoasted is a word.
Nope that's not a word either. Maybe nevertoasted. Nope.
There must be an antonym of Toasted! Every word has an antonym.
For each word there's an equal and opposite word! That's just SCIENCE.
Might have made that, "Joke," before. Either that or the same joke
but for something else. I'm putting All My Money on FOR SOMETHING
ELSE. Wonderful this is the most worthwhile thing in MINUTES!
Last paragraph of the act! My Minutes. Not
your minutes. My minutes goes back a paragraph or two. For you,
minutes can go back all the way to the beginning of the entry. I have
no idea how long it takes to read this If You're Actually Even Reading This.
Hmm. Just happened to be reading an article about latest
Atlanta-Milwaukee playoff game and the manager of the Atlanta Braves is
named Brian Snitker. STINKER. Another easy anagram which
describes someone. STINKER. Anyway glad we covered that.
It might not be funny but it's an important point to make nonetheless.
Hmm. Not only is that an anagram but it's a funny word.
And/or concept! Doesn't get much funnier than Stinking! What
else is going on. I think Atlanta is a little too close to a
palindrome for comfort. Not sure what that means. Either
way I'm gonna take a bath now. I'll be back in a little bit!
One Title After Another
What's up friends. Here to write the rest of the entry! I have
delicious Coke Zero going on right now and will compliment that with
delicious Coffee Eighty afterwards. Amount of cream is probably
around 60 or 70 calories. Coffee itself is what, like 5 or 10
calories? So I got that going for me is the point. I assume
the Zero in Coke Zero refers to calories. There might be Zero of other
stuff, too! SUGAR. That's even more likely than calories!
Hmm what else does Coke Zero have Zero of. Off the top of my head
Citrus Tropical Island Fruits. None of that at all! I dunno
there could easily be a splash of citrus in Coke Zero Formula.
Anyway. I remember back in the day when Coke With Lemon was all the
rage. Do I? Do I really? I remember them making it.
I remember seeing commercials for it! I might be overestimating how
much society was on board with it, though. Well it was exciting TO
ME. I feel like when I used to go out to eat for dinner with my
parents Me Or Someone Else would get Coke with lemon. This is so
extravagant I'm getting the cola I'm used to BUT WITH A LEMON GARNISH?!?!
So the point is I Forget.
I might be overestimating how much Fat Free Cream I put
in my coffee. I also might be overestimating how much calories are in
coffee itself. I also might be overestimating how interesting this is
to read. Wait. Nope. I know the terrifying truth of how
mediocre this is. Whew that's a relief. I wouldn't want to
get too big for my britches! Whatever those are. Some kind of
overalls or something would be my guess. Better LTURQ. Covers
body from waist down. Close enough for me! I don't have to
read any further than that! Also I'm not 100% sure they're not
thinking of PANTS. They say britches but what they're describing
are PANTS. Ugh. What else is going on. I feel like
Coca Cola still has a hidden secret formula recipe. Not sure how
they get away with that legally. Shouldn't we know what we're
consuming? Seems like some government agency should be making sure
they're not putting things in the soda like MSG off the top of my head.
Maybe it's top secret 99% of the time but they do let government testers
in on it. I hope so! That's a best case scenario all around.
Especially for the government testers. They can make A Pretty Penny
selling those secrets to rival Cola Companies!!!
What else is going on. Not sure what a pretty
penny is. All the pennies I've seen in my life are ugly. What
else is going on. This is only the third paragraph of the act? I
was hoping it'd be the fourth! But I guess that's too much to dream
for! One day I'll get to the fourth paragraph I'm sure. I
envy that day. Huh. That's not how things work! I
envy how things work. Ugh. HEY I got underwear on in the
right direction. So at the very least I got that going for me!
And that's how it'll stay for the rest of the day! I don't anticipate
having to take off my underwear for the rest of the day! Then again
you can never be too sure. Dunno what would entail me having to
take my underwear off but off the top of my head it sounds like it might be
fun! Whatever it is! Could be a surprise best case scenario for
how the day turns out!
Penultimate paragraph of the act! HAH.
STINKER. Brings me to the verge of presumably being somewhat
amused. Been a few weeks since you've known any of my meals.
Lunch or dinner meals at least. May have mentioned a microbreakfast or
two. Either way suffice to say I've been having more or less the same
meals as before. MORE OR LESS. That's all you're getting out
of me! What else is going on. My Mom just made herself an
egg! Haven't seen that happen in months. I had fun just watching
it here and there while waiting for coffee to be microwaved up. Didn't
quite smell it-- wasn't quite deep enough into the process for it to smell.
But I hope she gets everything she wants to get out of this egg.
Yep. That's what paragraphs are about. This One at least.
Amazing. Two MLB games going on today. One of them the Astros
are up in the series 2-0 and just need one win to win the series. I'm
was rooting AGAINST them HOWEVER I think I'm gonna root for them in
this game because Let' Just Get It Settled And Over With. I don't want
this to last any longer I NEED CLOSURE IMMEDIATELY.
That sort of thing. I only have to write one more
paragraph for today. Wonderful! You only have to read one more
paragraph for today! Amazing! Unless you wanna read a Crazysheet
Classic from 2017. In which case hmm wonder how that might go.
I have no idea what this was like in 2017. I don't even know what this
was like last week. To be fair I don't even know what this is like
right now. What else is going on. Sure I'm recording
Leprechaun Back 2 Tha Hood right now. It's available on Demand
somewhere-- they all are-- but I don't care enough to watch it on Demand.
I might care enough to watch it recorded from live TV. Hmm maybe
you'd think it'd be the other way around which one is easier.
Nope. You'd be wrong! Easier to watch what Live TV suggested to me
even though I have to record it and watch it later. YEAH.
That'll do it for today. I'll be back tomorrow!
October 9, 2021
Look I'm Typing Things
What's going on friends. I am here writing the entry only TEN
minutes after getting back from walk I instead of FIFTEEN minutes.
Normally I take a 15 minute break and lie down in phone and Catch Up On The
Internet. Today? Phone battery was dangerously low! Had to
charge it and spend that amount of time checking internet on computer
like an animal! So of course I'm gonna cut that short. Who needs
it! Either way that's all done now and we can get into the entry.
Sitting UP? I JUST WOKE UP RELATIVELY. I don't have the
energy to sit up in a chair. What am I SUPERMAN. You
know-- the guy famous for having energy? Hmm gotta imagine there's
one super hero whose main power is Lots Of Energy. Hmm lots of
ways I can add to that joke. So many ways the all cancel each other
out. Better just end the paragraph here and play it safe!
Anyway. What else is going on friends.
Several baseball games occurred yesterday! I'm okay with how they
turned out. It's not like I have a choice. I can either
be okay with them or not okay with them. I choose to accept what life
gives us. Not quite sure how to deny it if I wanted to. Kill
myself, I guess. That's the only real way to object to life off the
top of my head. Hmm. If I kill myself gotta kill myself
in a suspicious way that gets people wondering if I was murdered.
Imagine how great it would be to be murdered! Someone really took the
time out to end your life. You must be a pretty important guy!
Well Done on being a great enough guy to get murdered! Anyway yeah.
Also the person who murdered you may have to face consequences!
That'll learn 'em! Anyway yeah. I don't like this
paragraph. I don't like the first paragraph either. Turns
out I don't like most paragraphs.
What else is going on. I get to watch the
Christ Rock Saw Movie today. Presumably. I tried to record it
from life TV. I may or may not have succeeded! I guess we'll
have to wait and see. SURE I have trouble recording stuff from live
TV. Harder than you'd think! Gotta be some sort of computer
genius to do this. This is TV not computer. Well if you
were describing this to someone from 1994 they'd probably be like oh kind
of like a computer TV. Why do we have to go back to someone from
1994. If you were describing this to me, in 2021, clearly, as I just
said, I'd be like oh kind of like a computer TV. That's how
this entire thing started. Me saying that! THIS YEAR.
Which I'm PRETTY SURE is 2021. YEAH. Look it's Saturday.
Why should I wrote a good entry on Saturday. Take it easy! Both
for myself and for you. Reading something entertaining is too much
work on your end. I PRAY TO GOD that's the case. No I
don't. I may never have prayed to God in my life. COMPLAINED to
God plenty of times. Hey God WHAT THE FUCK this is BULLSHIT.
That happens all the time.
Fourth paragraph. The squeaky wheel gets the
grease! BERATED God. A step beyond complaining. YOU
FUCKIN ASSHOLE HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME!!! That kind of stuff.
Probably talked about that before. You don't forget a thing
like talking about your relationship to God and/or No One But Your
Imagination with other people. Anyway what else is going on.
I feel like I've tried to make amends for being a Jerk to Imagination God
when I was a kid. Gotta make nice now otherwise afterlife would be
awkward. Makes sense. Wait no it doesn't. There is
no God or afterlife. Oh right now that I think about it THAT makes
sense. Okay glad we cleared that up. Watched Killer Klowns
From Outer Space over the last two days. Ya know what? SCARY
FUCKIN' ALIEN CLOWNS. I don't know why but those clowns creep me out
possibly more than any Horror Things I've Seen in years. WELL DONE!
I feel like my Brother was scared of clowns as a kid.
I don't think I was. That's not part of family lore. But it's
also possible I Was just never exposed to a clown! You can't
fear what you don't know! Wait you MUST fear what you don't know.
That's part of society philosophy. Either way I was busy scared of
pigeons. HORRIFYING. I've talked about that before.
Everything I say I've talked about before. Except for 50% of what I
say. I LIKE those odds. I think the scariest thing I've
seen in a circus type setting is in Batman Forever where Two Face kills
Robin's Family. Robin's family were acrobats. Anyway it's scary
because This Is A Terrible Movie And This Scene Is No Better Than The
Rest Of The Movie As A Whole. It's SCARY because it's A BAD FILM.
Hmm that seems to check out. OH NO 80% of this entry is either Old
Stuff or Nothing. And the other 20% is Both!!!
HMM There's still 75% of the entry to go! Of which 50%
may be worthwhile! Which makes 37.5% of the entry worthwhile!
Which rounds up to 40%. WHICH ROUNDS UP TO 80%. Hmm.
Anyway I got coffee going on right now. No soda though! Just
finished my glass of soda. And I just came up with coffee. I
can't go right back down. What would people say!
Possibly Nothing. I can't take that chance! Anyway.
It's, "Killer Klowns From Outerspace," because the word, "Killer," starts
with a, "K," so of course they're gonna want the second word, traditionally
spelled, "Clowns," with a, "K," instead of a, "C." Two word
alliteration! Of course they could have done Killer Klowns Krom
Kouterspace which would have made more sense. But I guess that didn't
occur to them. Oh well better late than never. They still
haven't done it. But THEY STILL HAVE TIME. Anyway what
else is going on.
Of course they could have done, "Ciller Clowns From
Outerspace." But we can all agree, "K's," are more fun than, "C's."
I don't know if I agree with that. What else is going on.
I've noticed a recurring theme of Home Crowd Fans being more supportive of
Visiting Teams this year in playoffs. And now that I think about it,
this year before playoffs. There's a solid amount of cheers every game
I watch for opposing team doing good. I blame this on the pandemic
somehow. Not sure WHY. Maybe getting the vaccine is messing with
people's minds! Making them support the wrong team! I KNEW I
was wrong to take the vaccine. And now I know why. Hmm I've
been rooting for The Mets all year. UH OH Maybe I was a
Philadelphia Phillie fan before this. I can't remember anything
from before the vaccine! Oh No.
Eighth paragraph! Wonderful.
Philadelphia Phillie Phan. Sure. I was just reminded I
have NYU Sweatshirt Jacket. That sounds like a blast and a half to
wear. If only I could locate it. I MAY have put a tracking
beacon inside it. I can't remember. Well that does me no
good I don't know where the tracking beacon locator device is. I
need a tracking beacon on the thing which I press the button to track the
original tracking beacon! YEAH. YEAH! What else is
going on. Also it lets people know I'm a fan of NYU. Which I am!
I solidly have a positive opinion of NYU. It's a fun place even if you
learn nothing there. HEY maybe some people learn things there.
Seems possible. You can learn things anywhere! What else is
going on. I feel like after the fifth paragraph I continued this
entry's tradition of saying stuff I've said before and/or are worthless.
Well if nothing else I'm Consistent. Also Nothing Else. All
I Am Is Consistent! Sounds fair.
What else is going on. TRACKING BEACON?!?
I've never talked about tracking beacons before. I think I'd remember
that! I also barely talked about hem now. I just
erroneously felt oh that's a fun combination of words. Well that's
that. Moving on! Sure. It's a SATURDAY. Saturdays are
for BREAKS. I'm taking a break from writing entertaining things.
Makes sense to me. Also I was TRAUMATIZED by hometown crowds rooting
for the wrong team. I can't Write Good under such trauma!
Jeez. What else is going on. Superman Writes Good, I want
to write well. What else is going on. Feel like I've
said, "What Else Is Going On," 12 times this half of a paragraph.
Well, three times. Halfway there I guess. What else is
going on. Been enjoying wearing some sweatshirt jackets. Even if
its a little warm for them outside! I still get a blast and a half out
of wearing 'em. Also who cares one more paragraph to go!
YEAH. Sometimes it's good if the team
you're not rooting for wins in Preliminary Rounds Of Playoffs so you have an
easier decision to make when choosing who to root for for next round
of playoffs. YEAH. MAKES SENSE. Sure. I'm
rooting against the Houston Astros for example! They cheated somehow a
few years ago and HOW DARE THEM. Something about stealing signs with
the help of technology. I think you're allowed to steal signs without
technology. Maybe not technically but it is a semi-legit part of the
game. But technology crosses the line! That's what The
Terminator was all about! People developing robots to steal baseball
pitcher signs and it crossing the line and whatnot. Hmm. Then
again if any team is gonna be good with technology it should be the
Astros. THEY PUT A MAN ON THE MOON. What technology has The
Brewers ever accomplished. Brewing Beer presumably? I
always assumed that's what they were brewing. They could be brewing
other beverages I guess. Either way the Act is over! Be back
Getting Off To A Good Middle
Hey. Time to write some new stuff. Probably not.
It'd be nice, though! My Mom said she's ordering me a new sweatshirt
jacket. I believe she said it was black. That's all I
needed to hear? Black? That's stylish! That's why
Everything Is Always The New Black. Because Black is the Standard
Bearer for Greatness! More like I'm The Standard WEARER. Good
point! Then again you can interpret the phrase the opposite way. Black
is Ever Out Of Style And There Must Be A New Color To Replace It. I
dunno. I feel like it's an honor and privilege that black was
ever The Tops. What else is going on. Also it's good to wear
black at night! You might get hit by a car! And I'm assuming
you're suicidal. That's just the vibe I get from you! Yep
that seems to check out possibly. Anyway what else is going on.
That's a good suspicious way to kill yourself. Wear all black and go
get hit by a car at night! People would be none the wiser!
Sure. Then again you're causing lots of
problems for the car. Well, the driver, at least. The car may
get dented or something which isn't great. But the car will survive!
The point is what else is going on. My Dad has the day off for
Indigenous Peoples' Day. I assume the apostrophe comes after the, "S,"
when talking about what day it is. Better LTURQ. YEP IT DOES.
This might be only the second or third day in America History where there's
an apostrophe after the, "S." Off the top of my head it's this and
Julys' Fourth. Yep. That was necessary to say. We
surely couldn't have done without That. When people do Suicide
Attacks on other people, what's the ratio of They Wanna Kill Others to They
Wanna Kill Themselves. I think we tend to focus on the people who want
to kill others and in the process accept themselves dying. HOWEVER
gotta imagine there's another class who wanna kill themselves and are like
well might as well go ahead and take others down with me. Couldn't
hurt. I don't wanna give anyone ideas with that. I'm just
introducing a scholarly subject conversation! Get off my back about
Sure. What else is going on. Gonna
have coffee with Act III. I anticipate enjoying it! That's
usually how things go. I can't wait to see if Christ Rock in The Saw
Movie is more in line with the kind of performance he gave in Fargo than his
kind of performance in past movies. My guess? YEP MORE IN LINE.
More of a serious role I'm guessing. I guess we'll have to wait and
see. Probably wait a few days for it to be On Demand. Because
I'm gonna say there's a 75% chance I was unsuccessful at recording it from
live TV. The problem rests with My TV NOT ME. It doesn't
work half the time and trust me I'm Doing Everything Right! PLEASE
Believe Me! Sure what else is going on. Maybe the Milwaukee
Brewers are brewing Coke Zero. They'd probably be called The Milwaukee
Coke Zeroes then. Why. I dunno! I don't know lots
of things these days.
Penultimate paragraph of the act. Any pressure on
Atlanta Braves to change their name after Cleveland Indians had to? I
guess the reason they're escaping that is because HEY WE'RE SAYING
THEY'RE BRAVE. THAT'S A GOOD THING. WHY WOULD YOU MAKE US CHANGE
A COMPLIMENT. Makes sense to me. Wait no it doesn't. It
makes no sense. They should have to change their name too.
You heard it here first! I feel like there's a triple A team in
Columbus Ohio. They should have to change their city.
Just to play it on the safe side. Better LTURQ. Columbus
Clippers. Triple A Team for The Indians. This franchise team
names are just going from bad to worse!! Either way CLIPPERS?
I LOVE THAT NAME. But we gotta get rid of the Columbus
still. Thems the breaks! Anyway cleansing experience for the day
is creeping up soon. Amazing. Of course the Columbus
Clippers will have to move to a city starting with a, "Ka," sound. For
alliteration. And ideally a, "C." For Letter Alliteration.
Last paragraph of the act! Off the top of my
head maybe.. hmm... gimme a moment... CALGARY. Sure why not go to
Canada, they don't have indigenous peoples there so we DEFINITELY can't
offend them. Lots of things wrong with that sentence.
Roughly TWO. Two is a lot for once sentence! I guess.
What else is going on. OH NO. Calgary sounds too much
like CAVALRY. And in the wild wild west the cavalry were the
arch nemesis' of The Indigenous peoples! Maybe. Possibly.
I feel like that's half right. WOW HALF? That rounds up to
ALL. Hey that's alright. Moving on. Oh. I
know. CLEVELAND. Cleveland Clippers. Well that settles
that. Anyway. There's minor league affiliates for both Yankees
and Mets in NYC. Different boroughs sure but the same city! So
it's not as crazy as it sounds. Actually now it kind of sounds MORE
crazy. Not sure how or why. Just a feeling I get!
Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.
I Guess That'll Do It
was unsuccessful in my attempt to record The Saw Movie! However it is
now available on On Demand. So that worked out I guess. Took a
bath. I cleansed myself all over. That's how I do it! Been
doing a lot of sit ups and push ups lately. Lots! Which is good
because at some point it'll pay off somehow. More likely to pay off
somehow than if I wasn't doing it. If I wasn't doing it there's
no hope there'd be any sort of pay offs from doing its! 'Cremento
Clippers. They're in Sacramento now. But it's abbreviated
'Cremento like it already usually is among residents of The 'Cremento.
I'd go to Sacramento to see a Triple A Baseball Team. That's where
Governor Newsom lives! Presumably. Are there tours of Governor's
Mansions. Also is there a Governor Mansion in every state? And
how come governors get to live in mansions? So people would have
INCENTIVE to want to be governor. Oh Okay.
Coffee time! Gonna cut my hair with the help of
my Dad tomorrow night or Monday night. Should probably do it
tomorrow night. Cutting hair on Indigenous Peoples' Day is too
reminiscent of scalping and that'd be insensitive to do on Indigenous
Peoples' Day. YEAH. Look I know history. We scalped
them first! I get it! What else is going on! I dunno.
Poured my coffee just now. Well, 35 seconds ago. Well, 1 and a
half minutes ago. Then put it in microwave after I poured it.
Even before coming up the stairs with it. THIS IS GOOD STUFF.
I'm looking forward to cutting my hair. I'm just getting to a point
where I enjoy the length of my hair. Pretty long but appropriately so!
WELL TIME TO CUT IT OFF. Once you've reached Maximum Appreciation
you only have downwards to go. Might as well start anew completely!
YEAH. Also I really need to shave. Might as well cut my hair
too. YEAH. Also I wonder what I look like with short hair
and Not So Fat Face. Been a while! YEAH.
So I got all that going for me is the point.
Two baseball games tonight but not until Late Afternoon?!?! That does
me no good! ...UP until late afternoon, at least! Look I got
stuff to do already in the latter part of the day. What I REALLY need
is something to do NOW. And by NOW I mean SOON.
So the point is... uh... I'm upset about the times of baseball games
today. That's the point! Good point, too! Important
and insightful and relatable. I think we're all on board with the
point I'm making this paragraph. IF I LIVED IN 'CRAMENTO I'D HAVE A
BASEBALL GAME TO WATCH AT 2:07 IN THE AFTERNOON. GREAT.
Another reason I'm upset I don't live in The 'Cramento. These reasons
are piling up! It's about time I make concrete steps to look into
moving to Sacramento. Eh maybe later. I'll look into it later!
No I won't. Interesting counter-point.
Penultimate paragraph! I assume the main industry in Sacramento is
upholding the Governor's Mansion. Either that or something else I
dunno what do I know. Great. I think as a kid I was angry at
State Capitols that weren't the most well known and/or populous city in the
state. Not sure why it upset me. Maybe part of it was It's
Harder To Remember For State Capitol Tests. And of course part of it
was That's Just DUMB Make the capital the main city Don't Be DUMB.
But now that I'm older, I GET IT. The governor wants some room to
breathe without people bothering him all the time! Locate Governor's
Mansion and thus Capitol City somewhere a little bit out of the way. I
understand it! One day I'm gonna look up whether it's Capital or
Capitol. I must be capitol because it is definitely a word and I
don't know where else it would be used. Then again Capital just FEELS
right on the tongue. I looked it up. It's CAPITAL.
Which felt right! So I was wrong but my Feelings Were Right.
But then What's Capitol. Refers to Government buildings IN THE
CAPITAL. Wha... Huh... this is needlessly confusing!
Maybe you're not confused. But I AM. Get off my back about it.
Last paragraph of the day! I don't believe
it! Capitalism is the study of state capitals. Moving on.
Gonna have a nice solid 45 minute to an hour break between Entry and Next
Walk. I can accomplish a lot in that time period. I won't!
But I technically could. So I got that going for me.
Maybe if it's available I should get New Xbox in a month or two. I
need a new phase of life after Dieting. Playing Video Games sounds
like a great way to go. It's EASY. It's FUN. It's
PRODUCTIVE. Then again the odds are it won't be easy to get in the
next month or two! Which is for the best because video games aren't
productive like I just lied they were. They also aren't that much fun
in the end. Also they may be hard! The point is I gotta start a
new phase of life in two or three months and presumably it should revolve
around something productive somehow. Hmm gonna have to think about
this one. I'll be back here tomorrow though at least!
October 8, 2021
There Must Be More Titles
Hello friends. I'm here again! AMAZING. Waiting on
a Super market delivery. Could come before I finish Act I!
Could come after I finish Act I! Could come WHEN I finish Act I!
And I suppose Could Never Come would round out all the possibilities.
I can't wait to get SODAES. They taste like water but with certain
flavors. Also they're bubbly which I get a real kick out of.
Also I fee like they're partly refrigerated while in Super Market
Delivery Truck To Remember. When I drive them home from super market
they're room temperature! Both IN STORE and IN TRANSIT. This
way? Already kind of cold! I can drink it immediately!
This is the greatest news I've heard since I first heard this news whenever
that was. HEY yesterday both my picks for Playoff Rooting For won.
By which I mean one of them won and the other one lost. By which I
mean the one that won I may be changing my mind and rooting for the team
that lost. Either way though what a night for baseball.
Great! Not a single thing in that paragraph!
But now that we got Nothings out of the way the only thing we have time left
for is Somethings. Nothings is a word. Somethings isn't.
That's a good recurring topic. Words that aren't words that should be
words. And by good I mean nothing. Maybe I can
start my own dictionary. Not to replace current dictionaries but to
supplement them. I think people would get a kick out of being able to
use new words. And/or having the words they've been using that aren't
in original dictionary validated. Hmm not a bad idea.
Wait let me correct that. Hmm a bad idea. There we go
that's more accurate. Uh oh we're mostly through paragraph two
and again we haven't said a worthwhile thing. Hmm. Still
got time to rectify that! Have you heard the good news about...
uhh... Oh I Know. One of the two teams I Was Rooting For yesterday
won! That's good for all of us. When I'M happy it has a trickle
down effect to the rest of the world.
I feel like Reagan or whoever could have come up with a
better phrase than Trickle Down Economics. I mean I guess it
fooled enough people anyway. But Money TRICKLING DOWN isn't the
best choice of words if you're trying to make it sound appealing. To
those who presumably benefit from The Trickle. But what do I know!
Not a lot! I barely know the things I think I know let alone knowing
things I don't think I know. Hmm. TRICKLE DOWN
ECONOMICS? More Like You're Trying To TRICK..'ll... US. IT'S A
TRICK IS THE POINT. Anyway what else is going on. Is Trickle
even a word. After typing trickle 20 times, at this point it
just sounds like nonsense sounds. Yep it's a word. It
might not mean what I think it means. It might just be the name of a
character in a Charles Dickens book. That's my second guess for what
it means. I've talked about trickle down being dumb way to put it
before. I'll talk about it again! Also Trickle Down is a
dumb theory. Only makes sense you put it a dumb way too.
Charles Dickens? More like DARLES CHICKENS.
Gottem. Hello Mr. Trickle. That sort of thing.
That's the most interesting dialogue I can come up with to mimic Charles
Dickens cleverly. HELLO Mr. Trickle. Amazing. I'm a
great choice to take over for Charles Dickens after he dies. Whenever
that may be. In the future. Still rooting for White Sox over
Astros. Frank, "The Big Hurt, "Thomas was doing the pre-show for that
game! He was a fan of The White Sox. Pot committed at this point
to them I guess. Anyway I might root for Red Sox over Tampa Bay Devil
Rays. I Don't KNOW. This is a tough one! To be honest, I
think my most consistent impression is to Root For Interesting And
Competitive Games and/or complete series. Just watch the game and
enjoy an interesting exciting and engaging game. Doesn't necessarily
means I have to be happy for one team and upset for the other team.
YEAH that sounds like a BIG BOY way to Appreciate Sport. WOW BIG
BOY? ME? This is great news I thought I was small.
Hey coffee after this paragraph! I don't believe
it. Also I feel like I'm a low enough weight that I could call myself
small. When I was 5'2 and 170 pounds I'm big! 40 pounds less and
I'm small! Wonderful. Nice compact deal going on.
Efficient! What else is going on. Apparently it would be bad for
Sportsbooks if Giants win world series. Because they were giving out
great odds before and during the season. Hmm I like the idea of
rooting against Big Sportsbook. Then again that might also imply
I'm rooting against The Mafia running numbers. Does The Mafia still
do that? Of Course Not The Mafia Doesn't Exist. That's my
official position. Don't wanna step on anyone's toes. Better
just leave that topic alone completely. What else is going on.
That's what running numbers means, right? Gamblings?
Better LTURQ. Oh. Illegal lottery game. I was halfway
there. Well maybe more like 40% there. Either way that's
Hey I got coffee! That's good. But
honestly I'd be more, "Into," having soda right now. Coffee is good
though! Don't get me wrong! Get me right! That's what my
intention is for you re: how to get me most of the time. Anyway.
Woke up a big earlier than usual today. So I could solidly get in Act
I before delivery PROBABLY. Still possible I won't but it's more
likely than if I woke up later. YEP that makes sense. Tons of
sense! I can't wait to find out who new Mets Manager and new Mets
General Manager will be. Also presumably who Mets Specific Manager
will be. Cover all the bases. I hope it's people I've relatively
heard of. Wow someone whose name I recognize? This is great!
That's how I would feel. Maybe the Mets can go with a Manager By
Committee. Every week you pick a new player to be a manager.
I think there's 26 people rosters. Are there 26 weeks in a School
Year? By which I mean Baseball Year? My guess? Yeah
probably. Let's LTURQ. TWENTY SIX AND A HALF WEEKS?!?!
Well that's all well and good but what the Hell do we go about that bonus
half a week. No manager. Free For All! WOW sounds
like it'll be a Real Interesting Three Or Four Days!
What else is going on. Seventh paragraph!
I'd rather Super market come before Act I is finished than having to
wait 2 hours. Which would mess up my Walking Game. Also not sure
what to do. I already watched most things in the world that I would
probably find interesting. Stuff that's been made up to now, at least.
Lots of stuff to watch in the future one would imagine. Hmm.
Gonna have to look into that one. It's possible everything made and/or
released from this point on will be worthless. Guess we'll have to
wait and see. Wonderful. Watched episode III of The Blunder
Years. Okay stuff! I liked most of it. Some of it ENRAGED
ME. But most of it was good enough. Hmm what part enraged me.
Oh I know. They had several Quick Cut Away Jokes. I feel like
I've had enough of that kind of stuff from sitcoms. I expected better
from The Blunder Years! But besides that Decent!
Eighth paragraph. I could be watching MLB
Playoffs All Day. But probably I should figure out something better to
do. I COULD be minimally entertained by having it on all day but I
feel like I can AND SHOULD do better for myself. Maybe if this was
Elimination Winner Take All Games I could justify watching all day.
Who do I have to justify what I'm watching on TV to. I dunno.
You? That's my best guess off the top of my head. Maybe I
should root against San Francisco so that Sportsbooks Come Out On
Top. Maybe I wanna be making friends with Sportsbooks. Why
not. Couldn't hurt to have a powerful friend like Big Sportsbooks in
my corner. Why would they be in my corner just because I Was
Rooting Against A Baseball Team. I dunno couldn't hurt them to be
in my corner. That checks out! It All Checks Out!
Penultimate paragraph. Wonderful! There was
an article I read a few days ago that The Mets are gonna Blow Up The Team.
Really mix things up. I LIKE that. I like a lot of
players on the team and hope they come back. But then again Mixing
Things Up is fun! I wanna see some Mix-em-ups sure Hit Me With 'Em!
What else is going on. I played a single song yesterday on Rocksmith!
Now we're talking! Gettin' pretty difficult for me. I
usually get songs at around 85-90% accuracy. DECENT but I'm never
gonna become a professional musician missing 1 out of 10 notes!
Also I will never become a professional musician either way. Just not
in the cards! Hey that's part of life. I'd settle for
being a Professional Anything. Wow I'm a professor? This is
great news! What else is going on. Took Old Synthroid today.
Could have either taken Old Dose Brand Name or New Generic But Updated Dose.
I made my decision and I stand by it! Oh no I'm getting weak.
Can't stand anymore! I have to omuch synthroid in my system!
Whatever. I feel like I have more underwear
than I used to have. I just noticed this. I haven't gotten any
new underwear in 2 or 3 years. Just occurred to me, though!
Hmm got a surplus of underwear. Not because I've lost weight.
There's no pair that's New To Me because of this. If anything I'm down
a pair or two that are too loose now! Oh well I guess we'll never
get to the bottom of this. Yes we will. I already have in my
head! I have the same amount of underwear I've had for years but for
whatever reason I just noticed it's more than enough. AMAZING.
Act I is already over? I feel like if I had to guess I've said 0-6
Worthwhile things. Could be zero. Could be six! Also I'd
HAPPILY split the difference and have 3 worthwhile things. I'd take
that compromise in a second! Anyway I'll be back a little bit later.
I Think This Speaks For Itself
Hey! Had to wait 45 minutes after Act I for Super Market
Delivery to arrive. Could have been worse! Didn't muck up my
daily schedule at all. Also now I have SODA. I had to
think long and hard about which back-up soda I should have in the fridge
first. Gotta have a Coke Zero and a Supplementary Soda at all times.
I went with ORANGE. Sure Lemon Lime is delicious but for now I
think I'm in the mood for orange. In fact I know I'm in
the mood for it! I'm drinking it right now! DELICIOUS.
Anyway another Weekly Chore Down. Won't have to spend 15 minutes
putting stuff away for a solid AN ENTIRE WEEK. In the meantime though
let's see if I can think of 1.5 worthwhile things to say this act.
That's the goal I set for myself In Entry. .3 Worthwhile Things Per
Paragraph! Not too big a goal, not too little!
What else is going on. When you score goals in
sports it's The Conclusion. Your goal should be What You Set Out To
Do. Once you've reached A Goal you've just accomplished
something. For hockey for instance when you're passing around the puck
back and forth to yourself and going across the arena to the other team's
net, the color commentator can say This player has THE GOAL of ultimately
getting the puck in the net. And then if he gets the puck past the
goalie into the net, the Color Commentator goes WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT!
I feel very strongly about this. Anyway what else is going on. I
hope I can be a color commentator one day. BLUE. GREEN.
RED. BACK TO BLUE. Captivating. Never liked crayons as
a kid. More of a colored pencil guy! Go figure. Markers
are okay too. But crayons are the worst! Let's talk about it.
We just did. Oh, okay. Moving on.
Third paragraph of the act. Also has there
been ANY Real Art that's in crayons? There must be SOME museum
somewhere for Crayon Modern Art. But I can't think of any important
pieces off the top of my head! And I know Art. I can
DEFINITELY think of more than 2 pieces of art off the top of my head.
There's THE SCREAM. There's THE STARRY STARRY NIGHT. There's...
uhh... c'mon A THIRD THING. OH The Salvador Dali with the
melting clock. THERE more than 2 pieces of art. I'm some
kind of genius. Anyway yeah no one over 8 uses crayons. I
FEEL KIDS USE CRAYONS UP TO TEN. Yeah DUMB KIDS maybe.
YEAH. I put those kids in their place. That'll learn 'em.
Got one or two more bottles of soda this week compared to last week.
That'll learn 'em. Also we're supposed to be excited about bigger
boxes of crayons? Oh I got 96 colors you only have 12. KEEP IT
SIMPLE. You don't need 96 colors. You barely need SIXTY
Wonderful. Cleansing experience is creeping up
very quickly! I'm gonna have a blast and a half I guess. How
permanent is crayon. I feel like you can rub off some crayon pretty
easily. But not SUPER easily. I'd test this out but Guess What
No Crayons. Also Guess What I Wouldn't Anyway I Don't Care Enough.
Well that'll do it then. Are crayons wax. That'd be my first
guess. Apparently. Let's LTURQ. And while we're at
it LURQ how permanent are crayons. A) Crayons are Wax. B)
"Crayons can fade over long periods of time." Wow better than I
thought. That implies they don't fade over a MIDLENGTH period of time.
But that might only be All Things Being Equal. I feel if some jerk
took something you drew in crayon 2 hours ago and wanted to destroy it he
could wipe it off pretty good. So watch out for jerks is the point.
If you want your crayon art to last.
Last paragraph of the Act. I have strong
feelings on Sharpie. Wait no I don't. Moving on.
Solid chance I spend a lot of Upcoming Day (and next 2 weeks?) watching
Baseball. We'll see how much it keeps my attention. So far
SOMEWHAT. Anyway how much of what Color Commentators say are being
fed to them. 20%? ALL OF IT? Gotta imagine that some of
it they're being prompted to read and/or repeat. Oh well guess
we'll never know. Maybe we'll find out at some point. Some
sort of whistleblower giving away trade secrets or something. I don't
know! We'll have to wait and see. THERE'S NO WAY THAT TWO
PEOPLE COULD COME UP WITH ALL THAT STUFF TO SAY. THERE MUST BE 50
PEOPLE IN A ROOM WORKING ON THIS LIVE COMMENTARY. That's how I
feel. Anyway hey the act is over! I'll be back in a little bit.
I Like Those Odds
Hey! Time to wrap up the entry. Got soda going-- Coca Cola Zero!
LOOK was I so sold on Coke Zero that I had to change from Pepsi to Coke?
NO!!! Not because of the taste completely! Also realized I
was getting scammed 6 pack of Diet Pepsi 2 liters and paying for the 8 pack
of Coke Zero 2 liters is more cost efficient! The taste is different
but I dunno if I'd have made the switch otherwise! YEAH.
Good stuff! I changed sodas NOT FOR TASTE BUT FOR PERSONAL FINANCE.
Go figure. I never thought I'd Sell Out so much that I'm
possibly getting a different soda that I'd want just because it's cheaper.
That's not selling out. That has nothing to do with selling out.
If anything it's selling in!!! Wait, No. Not Selling In either.
The point is Selling Out is a completely irrelevant phrase to this
situation. Hmm what phrase would be relevant. Get off my
back about it!
What else is going on. Got coffee going on.
That's relevant to this situation! Anyway WOW so much of a day left
over where I can spend lots of time re-calibrating. Maybe spend the
entire day re-calibrating! What would I be calibrating... Re-...
I guess tomorrow. I'd re-calibrate what I should do tomorrow!
Sounds fun. I think I can double task Watching Baseball &
Calibrating even. That sounds fun AND/or productive! Anyway.
What else is going on. Like some nice colored pens. A nice
standard pen-- not expensive, just regular-- but it's in Red or Blue.
This is good stuff. RELATABLE. Who doesn't like a blue
pen? TEACHERS. Black ink or nothing! That's what
teachers say. Maybe. They'd be against red ink at
least. HEY I'M SUPPOSED TO WRITE IN RED. THIS KID IS STEALING
MY THUNDER. Also Blue I think is too much. THIS KID IS
WRITING IN BLUE? WHAT HE THINKS HE'S SPECIAL? ZERO STARS.
Also this teacher is grading your papers on a rubric of stars apparently.
What else is going on. Got the 40 calorie
fudge pops. No 40 calorie fruit flavor pops! We have to make
tough decisions in life as adults. Presumably. So far this is
the toughest decision I've had to make. So so far I'm actually
coasting pretty easily all in all! What else is going on. I know
what's on everyone's mind-- how big will my upcoming break be between Entry
and Next Walk. Right now? Looks like between 30-45 minutes.
Nice solid break. I can accomplish a lot in that amount of time.
Presumably there's some sort of Sports Center I could watch if they're
talking about baseball. Or I can watch it when they talk about another
sport. I don't know anything about any other sports but this is a
great opportunity to get the ball rolling so to speak. Gotta start
somewhere. Today 10/8/21 12:30-1:30 PM Sports Center On ESPN 2 may be
the starting point! Wow exciting feels kind of momentous.
Penultimate paragraph! They're THE CENTER
for Sports. WOW I'm sold! What else is going on. I
think Sports Center should have a spin off Sports Centre. And
it's the same thing. Huh. Not sure what that accomplished.
Not much is my impression! What else is going on. If I was a
teacher I'd grade every test in Yellow and write at the top of everyone's
test SORRY RAN OUT OF RED. And I'd do that every test and/or
paper! No I wouldn't. Interesting counter-point.
Ugh. It just occurred to me how weird it was to have markers for
mid-to-late elementary students that were special smelling markers.
You use them as markets but they're fun too because you can smell them.
WHAT THE HELL. WHY ARE WE DOING THIS. Was there someone
somewhere who was like I'm worried kids aren't sniffing enough markers.
We need to do better! Anyway, there was a google question
and answer Is it bad to smell scented markers and the answer was
sometimes yes. WHA... Bu.... HU.... !!!
Well that's that. Last paragraph of the day!
Are there kids who don't like art and are like well I'd use color markers
but if they don't smell like anything why even bother. What else
is going on. I guess. Also gotta imagine ~40% of kids who enjoy
smelling markers will take the next logical step and taste them.
Because ~40% of kids are DUMB. But we can't entirely blame them!
We only have ourselves to blame!! And partly them!! They are
kind of dumb and it is KIND OF their fault!! Anyway what
else is going on. Baseball game will be in the cards after I get
back from walk! Maybe 10 or 15 minutes after I get back but more or
less! Amazing SOMETHING. I was worried I'd have
Absolutely Nothing to do. Turns out it's only EIGHTY PERCENT
Nothing. 20% something??? I can work with that! Great
just great. I'll be back tomorrow.
October 7, 2021
What's Everyone Talking About
Hey friends! Time to do Stuff. Got coffee a-brewin'!
Good story. Now it's time for another story! Hmm what kind
of stories do I got going on. Why there's The Story Of Me Having
Coffee A-Brewin! Wait a second I already told that story.
Maybe I have more details now. Hmm. My Mom had made herself
coffee earlier! So coffee pot was still kind of warm when I started
it! Hmm. Also another consequence was I made slightly
less coffee because she won't need a cup for herself. HMM.
Also I had to throw out the filter leftover from her cup. HM!M!M!M!
Okay time to move on with our lives. The Dodgers beat the
Cardinals in Wild Card Game yesterday! I'm happy. I realized one
inning into the game I was rooting for The Dodgers because they had one of
the two best seasons in the Major League Baseball and for them to get
eliminated in a 1 game wild card wouldn't be fair at all. I root for
FAIRNESS. Except for SOMETIMES.
The point is sure I went to bed in the sixth inning.
I got THINGS TO DO. Like Be Asleep. That's the main chore I have
these days. Then again there's also the chore of Being Awake.
Also HMM. Got blood results from Endocrine Appointment
yesterday! Most noticeable result was some sort of Thyroid Result
which made Doctor say I can move from taking a .075 dose of Synthroid to a
.05 dose. HOLY SHIT. I'M GOING DOWN IN MEDICATIONS. I'm
HEALTHIER now than before. And you all doubted me. Then
again yeah I don't get to binge on these Synthroids at a .075 dose anymore.
It was fun while it lasted! But in the end I feel it's a positive
thing. Not 100% what synthroid is. I know it treats my
underactive thyroid. Or my overactive thyroid. It treats one of
my thyroids. Great. Overactive is a word.
Underactive isn't! I'd write an angry letter to someone about it but
I'm scared I'd use even more words that aren't words that should be words.
I've talked about underactive not being a word at least six times here.
Oh well Not My Fault it keeps coming up! KIND OF is. If I
didn't have an underactive thyroid it wouldn't come up so often!
Anyway. How can overactive be wrong re: Thyroids
Working. It's getting the job done AND THEN SOME. You
wouldn't fire someone for being too productive in a job. Why are you
worried about my overactive thyroid if anything I'm the healthiest person
around. Re: Thyroid Production. Whatever.
Cholesterol is HEALTHY. A little TOO healthy. Wait, no.
Scratch that! Appropriately healthy. Again high
cholesterol sounds like a good thing too! Now for the future I can
have less cholesterol because I already have a surplus now. Can't hurt
to be over prepared for the future. I don't know what that means.
I don't know what cholesterol means! Something about fat in the blood.
That's my guess off the top of my head. Let's LTURQ. Fat-like
substance found in the cells in your body. Well I was 60%
accurate. More accurate than you! You didn't even offer a single
hypothesis! You're useless to me!
What else is going on. Nothing good in this entry
so far. Three paragraphs. Not a single thing! Then again
that's not so unreasonable. Three paragraphs is nothing in the large
scheme of things. In the normal human life, we go through roughly
Three HUNDRED paragraphs. So this entry so far is 1% of our paragraph
intake AT MOST. Possibly even less! Ugh. Hey how's
New York Marijuana Legalization To Remember coming along. Let's LTURQ.
It's still coming along. WOW. I would have thought at
this point they'd have changed their mind. That's marijuana users for
ya! Always changing their minds! Also gotta imagine they were
HIGH when they came up with this legalization thing! This idea is WAY
OUT THERE. I LIKE IT. Anyway what else is going on.
Not enough soda and/or snapple to last me comfortably until Super
market re-up 24 hours from now. Hey that's life whatever.
Cool.! Here's Michael's Picks on who to root for
in today's baseball games. White Sox over Astros and Devil Rays over
Boston. YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST. Maybe you heard it
somewhere else first. I came up with it myself, though. I
didn't hear it somewhere else first. Maybe I did and I forget.
That's possible. VERY possible. What else is going on.
I feel like American League is more patriotic than National
league. They both refer to America-- PRESUMABLY. We know
America means America. We ASSUME National means The Nation Of
America-- but maybe it doesn't! There's plenty of other nations out
there that National League could COVERTLY be referring to! Oh no
I'm scared. Also American league has Designated Hitter while
National League doesn't. I feel the Designated Hitter is an AMERICAN
way to go about things. Having pitchers hit is OTHER WORLDLY. I
mean-- other parts of the world...ly. You get it!
This entry is relevant. Nobody knew what
cholesterol is! And we still don't! But we know a little bit
more than we did before. And that's all anyone can ever really ask
for. If they don't want to ask for too much. Nobody wants to ask
for so much that they don't get it. That would be upsetting!!
Huh. Today is Thursday huh. I can live with that.
Solidly in the top 100% of days. Probably. Maybe there's
more days than I'm taking into account and they're all better than
Thursdays. The point is I have coffee with me and I'm having a blast
and a half with it. I think it's a gyp with the Winner-Take-All
Wildcard games. First two games of the post season are very exciting!
Whoever wins advances. Then we go to best of 5 games. Which
means the first two games AT LEAST no one can be eliminated. We were
SPOILED with Ultimate Games in wild card. We can't go back to Winning
A Series. You heard it here first.
Probably! It's a great point and you may have
never heard it anywhere! ROYALTIES PLEASE. What
royalties. Whenever you pay it forward and make that point to three
friends. I get royalties on the ads you sell while having that
conversation. Hmm. Seventh paragraph! I'd watch Pay It
Forward again sure. I'd watch lots of movies again. Has Kevin
Spacey been un-cancelled yet. Better LTURQ. He's in some Italian
movie. Good for him. I guess Italians don't care about
Whatever He Did Wrong. I wanna say Sexual Misconduct. I dunno
what level. My guess is he reached an 8 out of 10 level of Sexual
Misconduct. Very High. Better LTURQ. Groped young men.
I dunno that's easily an 8.5 if not higher. Not a 10. Look
it's tough to get a perfect 10! The point is what else is going on.
Also when they say young men I think they mean under 18. Which is
a strange way of putting it! I'd CANCEL THEM just for calling under 18
year old boys young men. CANCELLED WIKIPEDIA. You're Gone!
Eighth paragraph. Baseball games tonight are on FS1.
Solid 50% chance I get that on my TV. Only one way to find out!
UNTRUE. There's roughly HALF A DOZEN ways to find out.
Actually MILLIONS. I can go to each person in the world and ask them.
Billions even! That's how many people there are. Ugh.
I'm gonna start at the top and find the CEO of FS1 and see what he has to
say. The point is I'm getting relatively deep into the entry and I'm
happy about it! Not a great entry so far, but you can't argue with It
Being The Same Amount Of Paragraphs Eventually As Every Other Entry.
What else is going on. I believe I can watch The Black Widow on
Disneyplus as of today! I like Marvel Movies. I watched them
last year during Pandemic Quarantine! I had a Marvel Summer To
Remember! And I DO remember it! Mission accomplished I guess!
What else is going on. Appears I can't get 40
calorie Fudge Pops from Super Market this week. Only 40 calorie
Fruit Flavor Pops. I can live with that! It's a back-up, sure.
Not ideal. But all in all not so bad. YEAH. They're
not playing today, but let's see what Michael's Picks are for who to root
for in National League series. HMM I Don't KNOW. Atlanta Braves
vs Milwaukee Brewers. Normally Braves are considered one of The Mets'
arch-enemies, but for whatever reason, I kind of like them This Year At
Least. And for some reason Milwaukee The City just rubs me the wrong
way. So for now I DON'T KNOW. San Francisco Giants versus Los
Angeles Dodgers? Again I DON'T KNOW. I'm gonna have to see how
much I like the home town fans in each series Game One. I'll keep you
updated on this situation as it progresses.
WHY. Nothin' better to do. OH
OKAY. I think Kevin Spacey should write An Apology Op-Ed and he
should say Sorry I SPACED OUT THERE for a minute. I wasn't myself
all those times I Did Bad. Dunno what that accomplishes. Did
I really wanna say SPACED OUT that much that I had to go through that
entire two sentences? I dunno I guess I did. That's life.
Been a solid week since last time I checked my weight. I'm
transitioning to only checking it once a month, though. Next time will
be October 1st! Wait no that was last time. Next time
will be November 1st! Yep that's more accurate than the first thing
I said. The point is Great Just Great. Also Endocrine Doctor
went out of the way to say EXCELLENT under my Vitamin D results.
Several hundred individual results she could be enthusiastic about.
For some reason she's PUMPED about my Vitamin D. Anyway I'll be back
in a little bit.
Nobody Tells Me Nothin
Whatever. I think I'm gonna be a standard Mets fan and root for
Brewers over the Braves. Now that I think about it, that's a
relatively easy decision to make. Screw the Braves! Also Dodgers
over Giants for me! I feel like Mets replaced both Brooklyn Dodgers
and NY Giants so it makes sense to root for either one of them based on
that. But Dodgers more! I'm basing this on my Dad being a Dodger
fan before The Mets. I base most things on Family. I'm a family
oriented kind of guy! That sort of thing! Anyway what else is
going on. I got the generic version of Synthroid instead of the brand
name-- Synthroid-- in the mail and this is a big problem apparently.
My parents are a-upset about this! Oh well what can ya do.
Force me to call Endocrine Office to see what's up. Yep that's what
they did. I'm okay with it! I want brand name too!
Only The Best For Me!
Amazing. Cleansing experience in four paragraphs.
I can, "Dig," that! Hey Indigenous Peoples day must be coming up in a
week or so. Better LTURQ. Upcoming Monday! It's about
time. I haven't celebrated Indigenous Peoples in at least a few weeks!
Wait that's not right. I feel like I celebrated them as recently as
last week. And by celebrate them I mean make the pun, "In Diggin'
Us' People." That's my way of celebrating something or someone.
Get off my back about it. I feel like I don't have any sort of
rankings in my head of Best To Worst Indigenous Tribes. Look all
Indigenous people are special. All tribes are great. But gotta
imagine some are greater than others! That's just Math! Gonna
have to look into that one day. Not today though. Too busy
Not Doing That. Also gotta imagine SOME tribes were jerks! I
hate to say it! But if there's dozens or scores or hundreds of
relatively big tribes, SOME OF THEM are gonna be jerks.
What else is going on. Aztecs off the top of my
head. So much human sacrifice! Jerks! What else is going
on. Baseball playoff game this afternoon! The game in which I
will root for The White Sox. I forget why. Maybe because of
Frank Thomas. He played for The White Sox. Nice power hitting DH
in the 1990's. HOF'er! HOF means Hall Of Fame. I don't
have time to write Hall Of Fame so I said HOF for conveniency's sake.
What else is going on. LOOK did Frank Thomas play a lot of his career
at First Base? Possibly! I wouldn't put it past him.
Better LTURQ. In Career, he played 971 games at first and 1310 at DH.
Good for him! More of a Position Player than I initially gave him
credit for! But still solidly a DH. So I was RIGHT but Not AS
Right. And in the end that's what matters in website. HOW
RIGHT WAS I. Amusing or entertaining or thought provoking aside...
how right was I? My guess? I'm usually about 60, 70%
right! Not Bad!
Penultimate paragraph. Hmm. GIANTS?
I'm a small person. Giants are my natural enemy? Why would I
root for giants when I can root for Dodgers. I dunno what they're
dodging but I LIKE it. So that settles that I guess.
Dodgers all the way! For this 5 game series. Then
re-calibrate if they win and advance to next series. What else is
going on. Did I mention I don't have enough soda to last me today
comfortably? Probably! It's very upsetting. I don't know
how to feel about this! Wait yes I do. I just said it!
I'm upset about it. Yeah but I don't know HOW upset.
Okay great what else. I hope I have FS1 so I can watch baseball game
today, but it would also be upsetting because I realize imagine how much
stuff I could have been watching on FS1 this entire time. I didn't
even think to check if I could! I've been missing out on classic
FS1 content! Hey that's life I guess.
One more paragraph for now! The good news is
I can easily write some dumb fluff. On the other hand I can also
potentially easily write some mediocre fluff! (Positive mediocre).
Either way I'm gonna do what's easy, but maybe I'll get lucky and something
good will show up anyway. Yeah. Frank Thomas's nick name
was The Big Hurt. I assume because He Hurts Baseballs. He
hits them with his baseball bat which has gotta smart. Also presumably
he hits them even harder than your average MLB player. Such that he
earned the nickname while everyone else hasn't. Hmm. Also maybe
it's because He's Big. The big may either be a noun or some sort of
noun-adjective. HUH. That doesn't make sense. I
wish it did! But it doesn't. If there was such a thing as a
noun-adjective we would have known about it by now. Anyway time to
cleanse myself. Be back soon.
If You Say So
I CAN GET FS1 ON MY TV. Oh Happy Day. Anyway got some
water going on. It's ok! Better than I expected definitely.
HEY Super Market seems to have 40 Calorie Fudge Pops which I can
replace the 40 Calorie Fruit Flavor Pops with in my order! Look would
I LOVE to get both? Yes. Nothing would make me happier to set in
motion during this 90 second time span. But that would take up too
much space in Freezer. Not only too much space that it would upset my
Dad-- literally possibly too much space that it actually can't be done!
Either way it's still a GOOD thing. I'm GLAD this happened. It
just HURTS that I won't be able to get both. That's part of life
though. The MAIN part. HMM what if I alternate every 3
hours which is in freezer. Put one in freezer for 3 hours, mix it up,
then mix it up again every 3 hours. That sounds PLAUSIBLE.
It could work. I think it would work! But only an insane person
would actually do that. No matter how clever it is and much it would
probably work. Ugh.
Hey great what else is going on. Got coffee
going on. That's going on. Sure! I like the daytime
programming for sports channels. Live Video Feed of radio shows!
Now that's entertainment! What kind of people listen to radio.
Other than maybe in cars. STRANGE people. Not sure I even
wanna know. Better leave them to it and the less I'm involved
the better! Also in Today's Modern Cars gotta imagine they could and
should put TV to the right of the wheel. I'm sure we have the
technology but for some reason this hasn't happened yet? I don't get
it! Don't give me none of that safety concerns. I've been
driving cars and watching TV before you were even born! No I
haven't. They don't have those cars, I just said that. Also I
never drove a car before OR EVEN AFTER your birth. I do watch TV,
though. That part is true. I watch a lot of television set!
What else is going on. Am I in the running for
manager of The Mets? Gotta imagine I'm somewhere near the bottom of
their list of 300 million potential managers. It's an honor just to be
nominated! Anyway I would take that job. People would respect
me! Hey he's got a job well done. That's what would make
it all worth it. What else is going on. Maybe I can get a job as
Live Video Feed monitor for Sports Radio Shows. Just stare at the feed
and make sure nothing bad happens. What do I do if something bad
happens. Alert a superior! Sounds about right.
Anyway two and a half more paragraphs to go until I get to stop for a while.
I like those odds! I like lots of odds. Except when the odds are
against me. Those odds are empirically bad for me I guess!
Wonderful! I just looked up empirically and I have no idea whether
it's right to use it there or not. I can interpret the definition
either way. Because I'm dumb re: This Situation At Least. Hey
Penultimate paragraph! The generic for
Synthroid? What am I AN ANIMAL? Maybe. I guess!
Anyway what else is going on. Gotta imagine I'll have more stuff to
watch on The Television Set other than baseball games. However
baseball games will be making a strong showing in my recreational time
today. Two games! Not at the same time! WOW gotta
imagine I'll watch ~1/5th of each game. Which equates to ~1/5th of
ALL games today. Yep that math checks out good. Real Good!
No complaints with how that math checks out. That's what this
paragraph is about. Hey did some easy math. Math is right!
I like math. Math is right when it's good and math is good when it's
right. I don't think that's controversial. Are there a lot
of anti-math people out there? And when there's correct math it makes
them angry? I guess! People get angry about lots of things!
Now that I think about it CERTAIN math might make me angry! It makes
some sense I guess!
I don't know. What else is going
on. I guess off the top of my head some of the worst math is when
you're doing math and you get the wrong answer and then you find out the
right answer. What the hell? THAT'S math? That's not
the answer I thought. Where does math get off calling me stupid.
Dumb math. You're the stupid one! What else is going on that
I can close up this entry with. Gotta nice solid hour between entry
and next walk. I said that in italics because for some reason I
was in italics when I started the sentence. And rather than correct it
I decided to just let the sentence flow out of me and qualify it afterwards
with an explanation. I feel I made the right decision! On
account of it taking up several sentences and getting me VERY close to being
able to stop the entry now. Hey great that's it!! I'll be back
October 6, 2021
That's All Well And Good
What's up! My Mom is cleaning Coffee Machine or something like that.
So I can't make coffee right now! She seemed to imply that it could be
ready in half an hour or an hour. That's still pretty upsetting to my
day! Could be worse though. My day is Upset now.
APOLOGIZE to My Day. Wait not you. My Mom. You've done
nothing wrong! YET. Anyway the baseball game last night
happened! It was interesting because I was obviously rooting against
the Yankees but then watching The Red Sox at home I realized ya know what
I don't like the Red Sox Fans either. These guys are jerks.
Being ROWDY? Rooting for your team LOUDLY? Thinking MY TEAM
IS THE BEST ALL OTHER TEAMS SUCK when CLEARLY The Mets are the best?
Also there was one live shot after a Red Sox hit a home run and they showed
people in the stands celebrating and then there was this college kid who was
like ALRIGHT TIME TO CHUG TO MAKE THE MOST OF THIS MOMENT and he was
chugging a beer like a jerk without realizing he was on camera.
The good news is My Mom just started coffee. That was sooner than
Look I understand people drinking beer. I do it!
95% of the time it's not embarrassing. But this was like a first time
drinker look. And everyone else is happy about the homerun. And
he's happy it gives him an excuse to Drink Beer Like A Real Man.
And we all saw it live on the television set! Anyway yes this one
shot made quite the impression on me. NEGATIVE impression.
You don't wanna be making negative impressions on me! I forget why.
Maybe because if it's a negative impression on me, that makes it likely it's
making a negative impression on other people. People whose
impressions you don't wanna... be negative... negative impressions on
them... they're getting similar impressions... hey what else is going
on. My Mom insisted in making coffee herself. Not happy about
that! She doesn't have that magic touch like I do. Then again if
it makes her happy I'm all for it. She's on her death bed as of last
week so in her last remaining days if she wants to make coffee I'm okay with
Yeah! Mixed up direction of walks the last couple
of days. I set it up such that my walks in the park align with earlier
times in the day more often than not! Because it's getting to the
point that the last 2 walks are after sundown completely. Can't take
walks in the park then! Too hard to see! SURE my eyes would
adjust after 90 seconds well enough but it's not worth the effort! No
effort for me! But effort for my eyes! My eyes only have a
finite amount of effort they can spend over the course of my life!
Don't wanna be wasting that effort every day on this dumb nonsense when I
can maneuver around it! Anyway. I'm glad Yankee fans are
unsatisfied with losing the wild card game as the ultimate result of their
season but I'm also envious that they consider anything less than World
Series Champion a disappointment. HOW DARE THEY HAVE HIGH
EXPECTATIONS THAT ARE RELATIVELY OFTEN FULFILLED. They're TOO
confident in their expectations and I'm worried that might make them overall
happier people. I want them to be UNHAPPY. And the fans of my
team to be happy. ONLY ONE OF US CAN BE HAPPY and it might as well be
I lost track of what that meant. Oh well.
Possibly nothing! Good thing I moved on then. Fourth
paragraph! I'll have coffee after the fifth just like always.
Wonderful. I PLEAD THE FIFTH. Oh Yeah Well I Plead The
Sixth Now Who Looks Like An Idiot. Hmm. Maybe I should have
pled the fourth instead of the sixth. Maybe the lower the positive
integer the better! We have no way of knowing. Anyway.
Fourth Amendment is the one that says British Soldiers can't quarter
themselves in your house. That can't be it at all. Well,
I guess it could partly be it. It could be American Soldiers
can't quarter themselves in your house. OBVIOUSLY British soldiers
can't. They come from another country! Better LTURQ. OH
WAIT even before I look it up, I know. FROGS. Fourth
Amendment is when frogs fall from the sky. Okay I made that joke
now better LTURQ what it really is. Law against unreasonable search
and seizures. That's kind of what I said. Only instead of
British Soldiers it's American Search And Seizures. So I was
Yeah! My Mom just gave me a comb. She
got it as a bonus for some sort of Hair Apparatus or Material she got in a
delivery. I don't have a comb until just now! I dunno what combs
are for, though. You can run it through your hair but so what.
Hair doesn't change. And if it does move positions a bit it's just
gonna fall back to the way it was. Also sure this must be
inaccurate. People use combs all the time. And it can't be
so huge a scam that everyone else also gets nothing out of it. But I
get nothing out of it and you can take that to the bank. Deposit
it! Check in on it every year to make sure no one stole it! Then
pass that on to your children when you die. Well, slightly after you
die! You can't pass it on WHEN you die, you're busy dying!
Anyway. My Mom is doing a solid laundry of some of my laundry!
We're talking HALF A DOZEN shirts. We're talking a pair or two of
underwear. We're talking SOCKS-- AN EVEN TWO OF 'EM! HEY THIS
IS GOOD STUFF. LAUNDRY TALK.
Damnit! Turns out my Mom didn't make coffee
yet. She gave me the impression she was! On account of calling
me and saying I'm making coffee. Turns out it was all a scam.
Won't be started until 5 or 10 minutes from now! That's USELESS to
me Re: Act I! Maybe I can have coffee with Act II AND Act III
today. Or just one cup of coffee instead of 2 which would be less
calories. OR I drink coffee with the last couple of paragraphs with
Act I possibly. Anyway you cut it though IT'S TERRIBLE.
Except for how all of those options aren't that bad. If you don't
consider it not being that bad, though, then it's TERRIBLE.
What else is going on. And I made the temperature one degree cooler
for her LIKE A CHUMP. After saying she was making coffee she asked
me to lower the temperature a degree? I DID IT but she didn't live up
to HER end up the bargain. Whatta scam. Life just be a never
ending scam. But I never thought I would get scammed by MY OWN MOTHER.
Maybe someone else's mother. MAYBE.
Huh. What else is going on. Also the comb!
That's a scam. Two scams in one day from my Mother. Can't
blame my mother for Comb Scam. She's an innocent victim of this scam,
too. Ugh! What else. National League Wildcard game
tonight. I KIND OF want to root for both teams. Solid neutral
impression of both Los Angeles Dodgeneers and St Louis Cardinalists.
This is a tough one! Maybe see how the crowd for the home team is
acting in the first inning. It will rest on how much I like or
dislike the fans I see. Sounds fair. What else sounds
fair. Maidens. Maybe the maidens you know.
All the maidens I know are unfair! Sure great. I wondered
yesterday if the special wall in Fenway Park would come into play yesterday
in baseball game. IT DID! At first I was like WOW I CALLED
IT. Then I realized well it probably comes into play this much
every game. Not so big a prediction to be confirmed. So I
got that going against me.
Sure! Eighth paragraph. At this point I'm not
gonna have coffee with Act I. Probably with Act II! Possibly 2nd
cup with Act III or no 2nd cup at all. OR 2nd Cup LATER IN THE
DAY??? Wow that would be a very interesting mix-em-up!
Amazing. AMAZING stuff. I can't get over the Amazingness.
What else is going on. I guess in the 1700's there was a lot of
soldiers making themselves at home in your home. Don't they belong in
the barracks? Why is there no other place for them to live that they
just have to pick a home and be like ALRIGHT NOW I'M IN CHARGE HERE.
Maybe I don't understand this hot-button issue completely. I could be
misinterpreting what it is! All I know is the word quarters
comes into play and I'm a fan of that word in this context! I feel
like quarters is a drinking game. Probably involving quarters.
Possibly flipping quarters into cups. Cups with beer in them.
And I'd guess you'd have to drink the beer and/or your opponent will have to
drink the beer. My guess is that's 20% accurate. Lemme LTURQ.
YEP that's it. Pretty much 100%! Sounds like a crappy game.
Most games are crappy! There's maybe a couple
of dozen good games and then there's tens of thousands of reject games out
there. The point is it's the ninth paragraph. Maybe the origin
of Quarters the Drinking Game was You Have To Let British Soldiers Live In
Your House And Then They Drink All Your Beer. Wow talk about adding
insult to injury. What else is going on. Maybe the British
Soldiers will share your beer with you. Then at least you're having
some fun. HMM the starting pitcher for Dodgers tonight is the best
player on my Fantasy Baseball team from this year. I've been rooting
for him all year! Then again maybe I'm THROUGH with rooting for him.
I've had my fill! Now it's time to root for someone else!
I've given myself a lot to think about or something. Three days
into doing push ups and sit ups! So far so good. I'm totally
able to do as many as I want! Taking into account I only want to do a
reasonable amount. Still though! Good stuff.
Last paragraph of the act. I don't believe it!
I feel like I'm missing the coffee now. Not just tastewise and
funactivitywise but also energywise. Oh well that'll all be rectified
soon when I have coffee after getting back from walk. Rectified REAL
good. My mom just called up to me that the coffee is ready.
GREAT. WAY TO GO. Better late than never. Sometimes.
Gotta imagine in lots of scenarios Better Never Than Late. I can't
think of any off the top of my head because I don't feel like it. But
you get the point. Possibly. There probably is a point I was
trying to make. So there IS a point to get. You probably don't
get it though. I barely get it! Ugh. What else is going on
to close up with. Might not have quite as much soda as I want this
week. I TRIED. I tried to get slightly more to last me.
Still not quite enough. GREAT Now we're ending things on a sad
note. That's too bad. I'll be back soon.
I Wouldn't Put It Past Me
Hello friends. Time to write five more paragraphs. I got coffee
going for me. Wonderful. Tastes the same as when I make it!
Even though one would guess it had a Slightly Different Water to Coffee
Grounds proportion. Hmm maybe slight differences don't matter as
much as I thought they did. Maybe maybe not. We're not gonna
settle this today! Let's all go home and rest. Do some further
research. Come back tomorrow with a fresh take! Hmm.
Probably gonna have coffee with Act III. I don't WANT TO. I feel
like I MUST. But if I don't really need it why bother. Damnit
this is a real Schindler's Choice. I feel like 99% of the people
who died in the holocaust would be dead by now anyway. So REALLY
what's the difference. SORRY. Nope. NOPE! SORRY.
No good. Oh well.
I can say that because I died in the holocaust.
Possibly. What else is going on. I think the blanket
conclusion lesson of the Holocaust Never Forget was A LITTLE too
vague. They should have also specified Also Don't Remember It AND
LIKE IT. That little loophole has been causing all sorts of
ruckus! What else is going on. Looking forward to a nice bath
soon. A WATER bath. Not a GAS BATH. Gotta imagine no one
had the luxury of Gas Baths in the holocaust. What else is going on.
Not sure gas chambers doubled as showers. Maybe they told them
hey here comes a shower get undressed. But I don't see why they'd
actually set up a shower. Unless the gas is in liquid form.
Which it isn't! It's in gaseous form! That's what the word
gas seems to imply to me. Then again maybe they were showering
too what do I know. Kill two birds with one stone. Kill em
and clean em! Ugh. No. NO! NO GOOD. Oh
Here's a new paragraph. I haven't made any
holocaust jokes yet this paragraph! Let's see if I can keep that
streak going and if so for how long. I'm enjoying coffee right now.
To enough of an extent that it's making it more likely I re-up with coffee
for act III! Hey this is great let's keep it going is how I
feel. Both re: Drinking Coffee and re: No More Holocaust Talk.
So I got that going for me. If I was a critic in 1998 I'd be like
HEY Roberto Beinigni, "LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL?" THIS IS ABOUT THE HOLOCAUST
IT'S A TERRIBLE THING THAT HAPPENED. ZERO STARS. Now all we
have to do is double check that it's from 1998... and... GOD DAMNIT
1997. I Was THINKING I should change it to 1997. If I had gone
and made a back up guess it would have been 1997. But I didn't!
This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone ever.
Great. Hmm. Maybe if I WAS a critic in 1998
I could have said that. 10% chance it wasn't released in America,
Where Critics Live, until 1998! Let's go to the video tape. In
the US it was released 23 October 1998. YEAH. PARTIAL CREDIT.
I don't get 100% but I get a solid amount of partial credit! Also is
it possible I can move on from this topic because I have nothing else to say
about anything relating to this. Makes sense. Anyway.
Going to the gas chamber and a Nazi Guard asks you for your watch. You
gotta be like well I'm dying why not this'll be my good deed for the day.
That sort of thing. Anyway the time that this act is completely over
is really creeping up on us! I look forward to that immensely.
Anyway. Only thing I learned from baseball game last night is that I'm
not rooting for the Red Sox going forward in the playoffs. Jerks!
Fans are jerks at least! And they, the baseball players, are jerks for
trying to appease their fans insatiable appetitive for being successful
Last paragraph of the act. What kind of TV do
I have in store for today. Maybe some fillums. Maybe some other
stuff. I don't have all the details in front of me! Well I have
the details in front of me in terms of the dimension of TIME. As time
passes throughout the day I will accumulate the details of what stuff I
might have in store on TV. On a As Time Goes On by As Time Goes On
basis. So I got that going for me is the point. Gotta clean up
my bathroom soon. It's been three months and lots of crap is
accumulating! Mainly hair. Hair accumulating in the corners of
the room. Dunno whose hair. Presumably mine! Not sure
where it 's coming from. And why it's bunching up. But I guess
some things we'll never know for sure why they happen. Anyway I'm
gonna bathe now! Be back soon.
Congratulations On Making It This Far
Hey! I am gonna drink another cup of coffee! After this
paragraph. I'll get right on it! Also we'll all get WRITE ON
IT. I'll be writing-- while, "On," It! When you're, "On,"
something that means you're consuming it and presumably it has some mental
or behavioral immediate effects. That's part of it! Anyway what
else is going on. Gonna have a pretty decent sized break between Entry
and Next Walk. This always happens now! On account of always
getting up earlier than I used to. Also the more this schedule becomes
The Standard, the less extreme this break seems! At first any break
was notable! Now that I'm used to it it seems like not such a big
break at all! So basically This CAN'T Be My Big Break.
The space between entry and walking. That Thing. Oh hey here
Wonderful. What else is going on. What's
the tagline for Poltergeist III. I was talking about it with my Dad.
We all know for the first one it's Carol Anne saying They're Here!
And I All Know the sequel is They're Back! I know
there's a third one but I forget it. But now that I remember to check
I'm gonna LTURQ. WELL THIS IS A BIT OF A LET DOWN. It's,
"They're Back... Again." For some reason I gave the franchise
too much credit that they'd have an equally pithy Tagline for the third
installment. I was wrong! Now I feel cheated. I've been
watching these movies under false pretenses! But it's my own fault I
suppose. I was wrong! I'm man enough to admit it.
Probably. What else is going on. Got some nice meals in store
for today. Don't worry about me! Worry about yourself! Or
don't, I'm not the boss of you. Also, even if I was the boss of you,
I'd say make your own decision on this. I'm not invested either way!
What else is going on. If Coffee with Fat Free
Cream was zero calories, how many coffees will I drink a day. Right
now I drink 2 separate cups, each of which is about 2 Of Your Standard
Measurement-wise Cups. If there were no calories, gotta imagine I'd be
drinking 4, right? Probably not more than 4. Possibly as few as
3! But MORE THAN 2 I think we can safely say that. Good
paragraph. This is what people wanna hear about. How much coffee
I would drink under different circumstances. It's relatable too
because other people drink beverages all the time too. What else
is going on. Also in this Thought Exercise coffee has exact same
effects physiologically EXCEPT for calories. You still wouldn't wanna
drink 10 and be all jumpy. Probably! Most people wouldn't want
to at least. Again, you can want to drink how many coffees you want.
I may or may not be the boss of you, but, just in case I am, I encourage you
to make this determination for yourself!
Penultimate paragraph. Maybe I should give you
some guidance on whether to drink 10 cups of coffee or not. You need
an authority figure to direct you. Hmm. Hmm. Don't do
it. I put careful thought into it and that's my decision!
Ship up or shape out! What else is going on. Have we all
forgot about me making fun with the holocaust. I think so. It's
a distant memory at this point. Whew. The point is we
still have to write another paragraph and a half. Then I take What
Will Be A Decent Sized Break. Possibly AN HOUR. Wow that's
TWO COMPLETE HALF HOURS. You heard it here first! HMM That
happens in About A Boy. Hugh Grant divides his life into half
hours. FRIVOLOUSLY. All his activities are A SYNONYM OF
FRIVOLOUS. At that point in the movie at least! Good movie.
Good soundtrack! All that stuff.
Last paragraph of the day! Wonderful. Today
is Wednesday huh. I believe my next chore will be Accepting Super
Market Delivery Friday Morning. Well not really. I have
to spend time ANTICIPATING that for the next 48 hours too! That's even
bigger a chore. The thing itself goes by quickly. Anyway what
else is going on and crap. The next 48 hours? That's The Next
NINETY SIX Half Hours. Do the math yourself! I think you'll
find it checks out nicely. Also what else is going on. I dunno
if I'm anticipating enjoying this entry being over now. I was looking
forward to it all entry. But now I realize hmm don't have a good
thing lined up for right after. THEN AGAIN something can occur to
me any moment. Maybe NOW! Maybe... NOW. Probably in 90
seconds or so maybe I Don't Know What Do I Know. Whatever.
The point is I'll be back tomorrow.
October 5, 2021
Today Has A Lot Going For It
Sure. Time to write some paragraphs! I am Home Alone right now.
Dad and Mom are away! FINALLY I can leave my bedroom door open and not
have to worry about Hearing The TV From Downstairs. This is going
great! Nice cool pleasant breeze from the hallway. Letting the
air circulate a bit. It's all good news. Anyway today is a
special day because you and I are together again. That sounds like
Mr. Rodgers. Mr. Rodgers is a creep. He's a stranger in our
home and he's coming on to our children! That's unacceptable! If
anyone is gonna come to our home and come on to our children HE BETTER BE
SOMEONE WE KNOW. We know Mr. Rodgers. From yesterday.
And the day before. Sure it's probably Mr. Rogers and not Mr.
Rodgers who cares get off my back about it. Anyway I never saw Mr.
Rodgers myself. Off TV by the mid 90's! It's about time.
Yeah! Won't you be my neighbor.
Look, either we're neighbors or we're not. Maybe we drew the luck of
having you as a neighbor, maybe we didn't! Either way I'm not gonna go ahead
and move somewhere just to be your neighbor. Maybe I will move
somewhere just to NOT be your neighbor, how do you like that? Why does
this guy want neighbors so much anyway. I have no relationship with my
neighbor. I stay out of their business and they pretend to stay out of
mine. We all know secretly they spend every waking hour with their
head to the adjoining wall to see what kind of sounds they can pick up.
But I KNOW THIS and can easily deceive them. Give 'em false sounds
to throw them off my scent! And the REAL sounds I make real quiet-like
so they can't even hear!
Anyway. Hmm. Do most private houses
Not Share Walls with neighbors? Probably! We do though.
Get off my back about it. The setup is kind of like it's one huge
house and then there's two sides which are mirror images of each other.
And we live in the RIGHT side. Solidly the size of a private house and
we don't share anything other than Wall. And it's not divided by
HORIZONTAL FLOORS but by VERTICAL WALLS. So it's a house okay don't
get the wrong idea it's definitely a house! PLEASE BELIEVE ME.
What else is going on. Apparently Facebook was down yesterday!
Oh No! Whatever will we do! We can't... uh... look at photos?
I forget what's appealing about Facebook. I've been de-activated for
roughly 3 or 4 years and I've never been healthier! Maybe when I was a
child. I was probably healthier when I was 8 years old! If you
don't count all the nose bleeds. DON'T BLAME ME PICKING MY NOSE.
It often happened INDEPENDENT of me picking my nose. Maybe picking my
nose set the blood into motion. It didn't start flowing until an hour
later. But we can't say for sure!
Kids pick noses! Nothing to be ashamed of.
I feel like I probably don't pick my nose anymore. Maybe I do and just
don't think about it! Haven't had a nosebleed in over 20 years,
though. That's a good sign I'm not picking my nose. And if I
am it's only a responsible amount! What else is going on. I
think we should have more ear wax. Picking ears could be fun.
Hmm. Maybe it's just me that has very little earwax. Because
that is the case for me. Maybe you got tons of earwax. In which
case I envy you. What else is going on. Not 100% why this is
relevant but I just remembered how when we went out to eat as a family as a
kid, the most exciting thing would be if when leaving the restaurant they
had a bowl of toothpicks you could take. I LOVED taking a toothpick
and putting it in my mouth. Both for using it practically and/or just
putting it there hanging out of my mouth for style. Hmm. Go
Sure. The Mets fired their manager! Or
didn't renew his contract. Either way he's not coming back as manager!
I'm okay with this. Honestly I was never 100% happy with how he was
both young and not a major league career. I dunno why those two things
combined for me into a negative impression, they just did. I thought
well if he's young he probably should have been a recent major league
player. And/or if he wasn't a major league player he should at
least be old. You can't argue with an impression! Especially
a dumb impression! We all know it's dumb and arguing with it would be
pointless! WAIT A SECOND his father is Felipe Alou. I've
HEARD Of that guy. Now I don't know what to think! Same stuff
as before probably. That sounds the easiest thing to think.
Already used to it. So I got that going for me!
Hey coffee time! Also his brother is Mousies
Alou. I remember him from video games! BASEBALL video
games. Felipe Alou had 10 children. Wow he must have had sex
ALL THE TIME. We're talking at least TEN TIMES over the course of his
post pubescent life. Wow he must be living the dream. Also
let's be honest he must be running a very high success rate if every sex led
to a child. We're talking he probably must have had sex TWELVE OR
THIRTEEN TIMES. That's probably once every two years for 20-30
years! WOW twice in one year?!?! EVERY YEAR?!?!
Moving on. It's time to move on! The criticism of Luis Rojas was
that he was too much a Player's Manager. Something about how oh he
was too close to he players. He should be antagonizing them more.
Wonderful. That's what you think bosses should do. Don't
relate to your subordinates as equals you must be JERKS to them and not care
about them. What's the deal with things!
Then again I've never had a job so maybe bosses
antagonizing workers increases productivity! In which case well if
it increases productivity I'M SOLD that's good for the workers definitely!
Sure great what else. Enjoying coffee right now. Appropriate
amount of Fat Free Cream as well as Artificial Sweetener! Totally
tastes like the coffee I'm used to day in day out. What does day
out mean. I get Days being IN. Wait a second no I don't.
What else is going on. Gonna have to trick My Mom into doing laundry
some time over the next week. Maybe use reverse psychology.
Don't even bring it up so she doesn't think I'm desperate. Eventually
it will occur to her hey nobody asked me to do their laundry I BETTER DO
IT. Either that or it won't occur to her because if I'm not asking
for it I probably don't want it. Hmm. Really makes ya think.
Eighth paragraph already! What a world, what
a world. Nice MLB playoff wildcard game tonight. Solid rivalry
between the teams! Should be fun to watch. Assuming I watch it.
It might be even more fun to not watch! In which case I Gotta Go WIth
Whatever Is Most Fun. Hmm. Can't remember the last time I had
fun. I have pleasurable experiences all the time. Positive
entertainment and whatnot mostly. But a complete and undeniable
FUN? Been a while! Presumably since drinking alcohol.
That was fun! It's fun to either do drugs and/or be around people.
Ideally both. But possibly just do drugs. And Drugs are
including alcohol. You wanna have fun you need SOME sort of social
stimulation. Watching TV just isn't enough! Then again what
else is going on. The Red Sox have home field advantage over the
Yankees for the one-off wild card game?!?! They have an INTERESTING
wall in left field. I can't wait to see if that comes into play!
Ugh. Anyway! Pretty nicely on schedule
today. Solidly ahead of what schedule used to be standardly! But
lately I've been ahead of schedule every day. So at some point being
ahead of schedule becomes being on schedule. One would imagine.
I may have made this point before, but is it possible the kid from Little
Big League is available to manage the Mets. Not only was he a good
manager then, but now he's solidly a grown adult man and would
presumably be an even BETTER manager now. Hmm. If he was
roughly 12 in 1994 he must be roughly 40 now. Also was Little Big
League from 1994? Let's GO TO THE INTERNET. YEP 1994.
ALRIGHT now we're talking! Also get this on Wikipedia it says the
character was 12 years old! Now we're talking Even More!
I can't say how old the actor was because he has no wikipedia page.
Unless something is on wikipedia there's no way of knowing it!
Sounds like a fair conclusion.
Last paragraph of the Act! I don't like how
in a few weeks or so I'm gonna have to start wearing Heavier Jacket. I
have no in-between jacket from Heavier Sweatshirt Jacket and Winter Jacket.
WAIT YES I DO. I got a leather jacket. Oh okay now we're
talking. Not only is there an in-between jacket but it's LEATHER
which is stylish. People will want to have sex with me twice a year if
I'm wearing a stylish jacket! Probably! Anyway what else is
going on. I wonder if the zipper works on leather jacket. I
wonder if there even is a zipper. If I remember correctly there both
is a zipper and it works. Hmm this is good stuff. Zippers
are fun get off my back about it. Anyway. I dunno. I could
always wear three shirts and two sweatshirt jackets. Get creative with
layering if I wanna figure out exact ways to simulate warmth and coolth.
That's not simulation that's ACTUAL. Anyway I'll be back soon.
Is This Still Going On
Hey wait a second. If you have sex 10-12 times, that's not twice a
year for 20-30 years! That's Every Other Year. Either way
still pretty good. Hey wait a second. I've talked about Mr.
Rodgers 10-12 times before and ya gotta imagine I made every possible
obvious just at least 4 times. Which would include today's obvious
jokes! Either way still pretty good. Anyway what else is
going on. Gotta nice upcoming schedule. ACT. Bath.
ACT. Short-mid-length break. WALK. Take a walk that's
what I always say. Huh. My parents are back! Mom's
eyesight is good. She's doin better than me now! She needs no
glasses for watching TV. While I DO. Well if I wanna read the
closed captioning I do! I can successfully stare at the TV without
wearing glasses and somewhat make out the blobs as people. But if I
wanna read what's going on I need glasses. Can't I just hear people
speaking. Yeah but whose got the time!
Wonderful. Today is October 5. FINALLY
we're just about almost 1/6th into October. It's about time!
Well it's 4.5 days overall technically. That's more like 1/7th
into October. DON'T RUIN MY GOOD TIME YOU ASSHOLE. What
else is going on. So far I have a solid streak of 2 days of doing push
ups and pull ups. Wait a second no pull ups. Push ups and
situps. Pull ups are where there's a horizontal bar somehow and
you gotta pull yourself up. What the hell is holding up this
horizontal bar though. That's what I'm wondering! Either way
that sounds difficult. I don't like the idea of having to do something
difficult! However the idea of having a horizontal bar somewhere in my
room sounds like fun. Even if it is just floating in space somehow and
nothing is holding it up. Maybe I'M holding it up while doing the
push ups. No I don't think that makes sense physically. OR
Huh. Feel like this is the first time I've insisted
on calling Mr. Rogers Mr. Rodgers. That's just the kind of
thing you'd remember! Solid 60% chance I've insisted on calling him
Mr. Rodgers before. Ya know what? HIGHER THAN 60%!
That's the kind of risks you take when writing this website. Repeating
the same thing for the ninth time over and over. Hmm seems like if
you're repeating something for the ninth time over and over it would
increase to the tenth and then the eleventh time, etc each time.
You'd think so wouldn't you. You'd be wrong! Stuck at the ninth
time! Hmm. I just saw George Harrison trending on Twitter
and was like OH NO DID GEORGE HARRISON DIE and then ten seconds later
I was like Wait a second George Harrison died 20 years ago. So
we got that going for us. Also guess what year George Harrison
died. Why It Was Only 2001. NAILED IT. FINALLY
some good is coming out of this tragic loss.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! Wonderful.
I had to DO SOMETHING yesterday. We got someone's mail yesterday and
it seemed like important confidential Bank Stuff and I had to walk that
sucker over to the right address A SOLID FIVE HOUSES AWAY to give to
them. They didn't answer! Left it outside! I did all I
could and now it's in God's Hands. Presumably God has hands.
Maybe even more than two of them! My guess is that God is exactly like
GORO from Mortal Kombat. Both physically and in spirit. What
else is going on. I tried watching Street Fighter yesterday but the
Xbox just wouldn't recognize the disc. I tried opening and closing it
35 times and it never worked! Either way Yes I Have 200 Films On DVD
and the only one worth watching as of yesterday is Street Fighter.
But that's not in the cards apparently. DAMNIT ALL TO HELL.
Wonderful. I haven't seen it in a while!
I want to see what it's all about now that I'm several years older and more
mature. I can get MORE out of it than The Past Times. What else
is going on. Gotta imagine there's several sentences worth of things
also going on that I can wrap up this act with. Uh oh then there's
5 more paragraphs presumably without those several sentences worth of
things. We'll cross that bridge when we get there! Unless if
we wanna stay on our side of the bridge! I'm not 100% convinced that
crossing this bridge will get us anywhere better than where we already are!
Also Risky! Sure bridge probably won't collapse but all things
being equal why even bother taking the risk! I wish I lived on a
bridge. Huh. You mean like a troll? Trolls live under
bridges. Yeah I wanna live ON TOP of the bridge. Hmm.
I'll be back in a little bit.
Let's Read Up To The End
How can trolls live underneath bridges. If there's a place underneath
the bridge for the troll to live, why is the bridge there in the first
place? Hmm. Anyway got some snapple going on right now.
Delicious! It's ICED TEA I believe. Or maybe just Lemon Flavor
Water. Or both! Either way Delicious. I wonder why Street
Fighter doesn't work. I don't think I watched it so many times.
I don't think I left it out of case so often. I guess Xbox just isn't
a fan of Street Fighter! Pretty dumb of Xbox but then again Xbox is
the dumbest thing possible A MACHINE. You heard me Machines!
I'm calling you out! For being dumb! If you're so smart just
play the Digital Video Disc what the Hell is your problem. Maybe I
should track down the VHS I have of Street Fighter and jam that into the
Xbox. I dunno if I still have my non-home-movie old VHSes.
Well that solves that problem. By not solving the problem. But
it solves the problem of potentially having to solve the problem. We
now know there is possibly no solution!
Yeah! Wonderful. Anyway gotta write four
more paragraphs. I wonder what I will say in them. I already
erroneously called DVDs Digital Video Discs when we all know DVD really
means... lemme LTURQ... Digital Video Disc. Hmm.
Nailed! It! For some reason I thought the V would be different.
Was confident in the Digital Discs but the Video I had a gut feeling was
some other sort of V. I WAS WRONG BY BEING RIGHT and I
apologize. I talked to my brother yesterday to wish him a happy
birthday and it turns out he's been watching The Sampsons too!
We're on different seasons but its nice to know I have a friend whose also
taking a Sampsons Journey these days. He's on season 24?!?!
I'm only on season 16?!? This hardly seems fair. Also it's
REALLY not fair because he didn't put in the work to get to season 24! He
just picked it by random! Look if you're watching The Simpsons PUT
IN THE WORK. Start from the beginning. You IDIOT.
Anyway. Kind of upset I don't appear in the
Pandora Papers. I mean it's good that I'm not getting in trouble for
anything. And it's ACCURATE that I haven't participated in any of
these activities. However all in all I feel my life would be better if
I was hiding ill gotten millions of dollars places. And probably Still
Won't Face Any Consequences. I like what that fact would imply about
the rest of my life! Oh well can't hurt to dream. Also
only the best of the best are in the pandora papers! It's a real
WHOSE WHO of the best people around. It'd be a PRIVILEGE and an HONOR
to be among that class of people. Oh well can't hurt to dream.
TONY BLAIR? DOESN'T GET ANY CLASSIER THAN THAT. I assume
Tony Blair is a combination of Tony Soprano and Linda Blair. That's
why I think he's the classiest! Huh.
Penultimate paragraph. What else is going on.
WHOSE WHO? One can only imagine I made that erroneous spelling of
Who's ON PURPOSE and For A Joke and IT IS FUNNY SOMEHOW. We're
making a lot of assumptions with that there. A LOT of assumptions.
Also sure I like the word erroneous. I think we should all be saying it more
often. It's fun! Anyway that's a good idea for next The Who
album. Either one! Who's Who OR Whose Who. Now the ball is in
their court. Also I've probably made that Album Name Suggestion
twice in the past. Oh well. Also I could have joked about
making it in the past by saying I made it nine times in the past.
Instead O said two. You know why? Because it's most likely I've
said it two times in the past! Just Now being the third time! I
don't make Jokes I make Accuracies. Get off my back about it!
Also I often don't make Accuracies. I don't make Jokes I
don't make Accuracies I just make... uhh... what's the third kind of
thing you can say? Whatever it is That's What This Is.
Wonderful. Gotta nice 30-40 minute break it's looking like after
this act before next walk. I can watch Plenty Of Stuff in that time.
Maybe a Tales From That Crypt for some reason. It just occurred to me
and I do things that occur to me! If I didn't wanna do them why should
I bother having them occur to me? Occur to me ERRONEOUSLY.
Nope. God Being Goro is borderline amusing if you know who Goro
is! Gotta imagine some people are familiar with Goro and some people
aren't. That's life! Gotta imagine if you understand references
you are inherently amused by them. HEY I KNOW THAT THING. How
Amusing. Great. I'll be back tomorrow!
October 4, 2021
First Things First
Hey dummies. It's gonna be 20 paragraphs we get to write and/or read
coming up! PERSONALLY I will be 70% writing it out of 100% and 20%
reading it out of 100%. My guess is you will HMM HOW MUCH WILL YOU
BE WRITING IT. I was gonna say Zero but maybe when you read
this you feel like you're writing it, too! Anyway you're also 20%
reading it and maybe you're partially writing it too! That makes
sense. TOO MUCH SENSE. Wait not too much sense. An
appropriate amount of sense! Things can't make too much sense.
If it makes sense it's a good thing! Otherwise the universe wouldn't
allow it. So if it makes A Lot Of Sense how could that be too much?
The More Sense The Better, that's what I've always said. Never said
it before. This might be the start of a tradition, though!
Gotta start somewhere. MONDAY TODAY HUH? IF YOU SAY SO.
Hey wonderful just wonderful. Nice day I got
in store for me. Dunno what I'm gonna do but presumably when I
recalibrate in a few hours I'll work the kinks out. The Rest Of The
Day Kinks. GOOD Kinks. I think if you don't specify it might be
implied your standard kinks are bad. Hey NORMAL IS GOOD now there's
KINKS?!! That's a detriment to Normal and thus Good. But
sometimes kinks make things better. THIS GUY knows what I'm talking
about! What guy. Some guy that's neither you nor me.
Oh I see that narrows it down. Anyway what else is going on.
I was looking at KFC Menu for some reason and I was like hey if I really
wanted to eat a 4000 calorie meal I could do a lot worse than KFC.
A LOT worse. When I first started high school I think I thought
I would be getting KFC every day. It was in Penn Station on way to and
from high school. And it was a novelty at the time that I only got
rarely before then. I got it once or twice and it was gross.
Both because of the location and also because it turns out KFC is gross!
Now we know.
Anyway. Does KFC still come in buckets.
I feel like that was the novelty of KFC either when I was very young or even
before I was born. Buy some fried chicken and you get a nice bucket
with it. I'm guessing they discontinued that practice by now.
Well you lost MY VOTE. What vote. IF YOU HAVE TO ASK YOU
CLEARLY DON'T KNOW. Anyway what else is going on. Been a
while since I had ANY sort of bucket. Seems like kind of an
oversight. Buckets are bad for the environment. I'm not 100%
sure why but I feel like that's a safe assumption to make.
EVERYTHING is bad for the environment. That's almost true. I
feel like 90% of things are bad for the environment. Oh well that's
life. Is there anything actively GOOD for the environment. I
know there's terrible things for the environment, bad things for the
environment, more or less generally bad things for the environment, and
neutral things for the environment. Anything GOOD we can do?
I don't think so that doesn't make much sense. Human and Environment
are Mortal Enemies.
Fourth paragraph! Amazing. HMM
Fourth Paragraph and FINAL paragraph start with the same letter and/or
phonetic sound. Does that mean this is the last paragraph?
No. Of course not. That's nonsense. STILL it couldn't hurt to
dream. Unless you're driving a car. Then you can easily get
into an accident. Even if you're driving some other sort of vehicle!
Anyway. Was taking my walks and there were 2 or 3 Go Kart Lawn Mowers
driving around on the sidewalk/lawns. Not sure if you need a license
for these go kart lawnmowers. They're definitely vehicles that could
run you over. And they're on the sidewalk half the time-- exactly
where people are walking! The point is I wonder if they need a license
AND how much a go kart costs AND if it's legal to drive go kart lawnmowers
down the streets OR sidewalks. Clearly they're driving around on the
sidewalk now. There's probably some law that goes if you're
traveling over let's say half a mile Now It's Illegal. Gotta keep it
in a CONFINED space. You must be using it FOR LAWN MOWING GOOD not for
That's a strangely phrased Law. Seems kind of
too colloquial. HEY how about this for fall weather-- I'm wearing my
sweatshirt jacket-- INSIDE. Not just for style but for Heat
Temperature Comfort. Was getting too cold without it! Then again
it's also for style. It's a nice GREY sweatshirt jacket.
JEALOUS MUCH? Why are they called sweatshirts lets talk about it.
Presumably if you were sweating you wouldn't be wearing the shirt.
That's all we had to talk about it with. Nothin' else there.
Amazing. Coffee after this paragraph! Hey that's Amazing too.
Two amazing things in a row! Coffee coming soon and the dumb thing I
said before then. Something about how if sweat shirts made you sweat
you wouldn't wear them. Yeah that sounds vaguely familiar.
Anyway. Oh hey this paragraph is over. And here I was
sitting here for 400 minutes trying to think of something to say. When
I could have just hit Enter and then Indent! FALSE. Indent
doesn't work. It changes the format of the website page or something.
Gotta just hit Space Bar several times to MIMIC an Indentation.
I've talked about that before. Probably
roughly 20 times. CAN'T INDENT GOTTA MIMIC IT. Ya know
what 20 times isn't that much considering I have to do it 20 times A DAY.
So get off my back about it, etc. MLB Playoff Starting Positions are
in! I'm rooting for hmm I can pick some teams to root for slightly
more than the other teams they're facing. But then again I
forget why I'm supposed to care. Baseball is FUN to watch.
You got the 9 innings. You got home and away. Strategy comes
into play. You put all that together and you got a BLAST AND A HALF
of a Three Hour and 10 Minute period. Three hours and 10 minutes?
WHY DON'T THEY JUST SAY 190 MINUTES TO SAVE TIME. They need to
save all the time they can! These games are taking forever!
Hmm. Why is Them Saying It being added on to the time of the game.
THEY TAKE A BREAK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FOURTH INNING TO SAY IT. Oh
okay now I see.
Seventh paragraph. My Mom is watching SNL and
before seeing him she thought Owen Wilson was James Bond. And I was
like man what an idiot. Then I realized well what do we
really know about The Real James Bond. We know he has it in him to
go deep undercover. Maybe it is Owen Wilson! We don't know for
sure. The Real James Bond isn't a person it's a book.
Books are people. Huh. OWEN WILSON? YOU KNOW WHAT I
SAY? DENNIS THE MENACE IS OWIN' WILSON AN APOLOGY. Nailed it.
Well that's it for tonight!!! Huh? I have to write more?
That hardly sounds fair. Anyway what else is going on. KFC
is great for 4000 calorie meals because I feel like you could eat the 4000
calories and not feel full. Some other place, 4000 calories would
become a hassle 2/3rds through and you'd feel sick. KFC? I feel
like you could just eat that indefinitely without feeling satisfied.
Eighth paragraph. Not sure what I'm basing
that on. It sounds like something that might be an insight-em-up
but it also sounds like something well I don't get it Why Is That The
Case. Then again I'll Take My Word For It. That's life I
guess. YOU KNOW WHAT I SAY? TOM HANKS IS OWIN' WILSON AN
APOLOGY. No I don't say that. Let's stick with the first
one. I mean I guess Volley Ball Wilson is KIND OF owed an apology.
I feel like he's lost at sea ultimately, right? Due to Tom Hanks.
What a shitty thing to do to a friend. Lose Them At Sea.
Oh well what can ya do. Tom Hanks' name can be abbreviated T.
Hanks. THANKS. This is the kind of high quality content
you've grown accustomed to getting from this website. Also am I
sure it's Tom Hanks and not Tom Hank. And the reason I'm thinking
of Tom Hanks is because I always think of him in the possessive and/or I
always think of Multiple Tom Hank's? Now I don't know what to
think. Maybe it is Tom Hank. Gonna have to LTURQ later once
I have the time.
Penultimate paragraph of the act! How much did
the volleyball who played Wilson in Castaway make. He's one of the
main supporting characters! Gotta imagine he made a solid mid-to-high
six figure sum for that role. What's a ball gonna do with money.
Well maybe the owner gets the money. Oh okay I see.
What else is going on. Solid 2/3rds chance Wilson is lost at sea and
1/3rd chance he has some other ultimate fate. I can't REMEMBER.
Get off my back about it. What's Tom Hank's name in the movie.
Something Castaway. Maybe Bill. Bill Castaway. Better
LTURQ just to make sure. Oh Chuck Noland. I was halfway
there. More or less got it right. While reading the cast list on
Wikipedia to find out the name of the character I honestly was half prepared
to see someone listed as Wilson. We're beyond joking right now.
For a half second I was like hmm wonder who played Wilson.
Last paragraph of the act! I wasn't so much
wondering who played Wilson as I was PREPARED to find out who played him.
I didn't really care because I knew it would be no one I ever heard of but I
sort of expected o see it in my peripheral vision while seeing Tom Hank's
characters' name. Great just great. What is the main
thing Dennis The Menace does to Wilson that's so bad. Runs around on
his lawn. Off the top of my head that's about as high the stakes get.
Maybe Dennis has a go kart lawnmower and is always chasing Mr. Wilson down
when he laves the house. LEAVES the house? More like
Dennis the menace is STOMPING AROUND on the leaves on Mr. Wilson's yard!
Those leaves don't belong to you Dennis! Stay away from Mr. Wilson's
Leaves! Huh. I lost track of what I was talking about.
Oh hey the paragraph is over. I'll be back soon.
Now It's Time For The Middle
Hello friends! Nice long break between Walk II and future Walk III.
I have both Acts and Cleansing Activity to cover some of the time in-between
but I also am gonna have some FREE time. Wow TIME? TO DO
STUFF? NOW YOU'RE TALKING MY LANGUAGE. Probably some Shutter
The Screaming Service movie. They have SEVERAL new ones to watch.
Wow SEVERAL? NOW YOU'RE TALKING MY LANGUAGE. Anyway just did
The Chore Of A Lifetime by moving some plastic chair from one room to
another room. Bathroom was 2nd room! It's a Shower Chair.
Ya put it in the shower so you can take a shower without standing.
Hmm why couldn't you take a bath. Because you want SHOWER water
not bathwater. Why can't you just sit down in the bath and take a
shower. Hmm Interesting Counter-point. You can sit down in
the shower without a bonus chair. In fact you SHOULD sit down in the
shower without a bonus chair. It's fun! I feel like I've done
this in the past for one reason or another!
YEAH. What if you wanna stand on the plastic
chair in the shower so you're at eye level with the shower. Hmm.
I feel like I'd be ABOVE eye level with the shower if I were standing on
ShowerChair and I'm a short guy. FINALLY IT'S ABOUT TIME I'M HIGHER
THAN WATER LEVEL. I've been waiting for this scenario my entire
life! Ugh. I want to do a bit about What kind of
people do the shower with THIS setting but I have no way to sufficiently
describe the different shower settings. If I was able to send you a
Motion Picture of several standard shower water pressure/shapes/etc I could
easily be like Who Likes THIS ONE AM I Right!?! But I can't
describe it 100% Suffice to say it's one of the Least Pressurized but
it's also the shapes of the waterfall that gets my grits going.
Getting my grits going? That sounds like a positive thing.
But it's not. It's a negative thing!
Anyway. Looking forward to Coffee #2 of the day
to remember with Act #3 of the day to forget. You wanna remember
the good stuff and forget the bad stuff. Coffee = good stuff.
Act III's = bad stuff. You heard it here first. I think
it was The Great Gatsby Writer who said There are no second acts in
American Life and there are REALLY, DEFINITELY, NO CHANCE, third acts in
American Life. What's that guy's name. Oh. F Scott
Fitzgeralds, right? Better LTURQ to confirm. Hmm accurate and
GET THIS he wrote The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. I assumed
it was some dumb movie producer who came up with it because it's a dumb
movie. Based on a short story! By a real author! Go
figure! Then come back. Once you're done figuring.
There's more paragraphs to be read!
What else is going on. There's a third act in
Benjamin Button's life. It's Him Being A Baby. Hmm.
Makes ya think. No it doesn't. Interesting Counter-Point.
What else is going on. I assume the F in F Scott Fitzgerald is
for Fuck. FUCK Scott Fitzgerald. Sort of a take-off of L.
L. Cool J. Either because he wants ladies to fuck him or he knows
someone else just called Scott Fitzgerald who isn't him that he really
hates. FUCK THIS GUY, etc. Anyway what else is going on.
Gonna take a bath soon without any sort of chair. Hmm. One
scenario I forgot to cover was taking a bath with the chair. Gotta be
hard! For the water level to reach above your legs it'd be overflowing
the tub. And thus wouldn't reach you at all. Until the entire
room is full of water. Once the entire room is covered in water
eventually it will go higher and higher and engulf you too.
EVENTUALLY. If you've got the time for that. This could take a
very long time.
Ugh. Successfully started doing push ups and sit
ups yesterday! Now the question is whether I can start a streak today.
Two days in a row? VERY possible as of now. Also it wasn't too
hard! I did three sets of 15 push ups and sit-ups each over the course
of the day. 15 and 15 at ONE time. Then doing it again SEVERAL
HOURS LATER. Then once more hours after that! That's it.
EASY. Just keep doing that every day. That's all I need to
do! WONDERFUL now my life will be tangibly better somehow one would
imagine. Ugh. Maybe some sort of video game today.
Either a real video game or Guitar Learning video game. I can have fun
either way! I could also Not Have Fun either way. That's why I
haven't done it lately! I calculated I'd have less than Zero fun.
Then again that's only calculations. We can't know for sure unless
I actually try! GREAT I'm gonna take a bath break now.
I Lost Track Of What's Going On
Hey friends! Took a shower. Didn't even overflow the reservoir
that is my bathtub such that the new ultimate reservoir became my bathroom!
ALRIGHT that's halfway there to a successful day. Didn't flood the
house! What else is going on. Although maybe I set into motion
the flooding of the house. Possible that after turning off Bath Nozzle
there was still drips where there was a single drip of water falling from
faucet into bathtub maybe once every thirty seconds. I HOPE that stops
soon. But if it doesn't then in a million years my bathtub might be
close to overflowing! Gotta prepare NOW for a million years from
now. We don't wanna leave this to future generations that's not
fair to them! What else is going on. HMM ESPN/MLB has a headline
Giants Cap Season To Remember, Clinch NL West. SEASON TO REMEMBER?
I wonder where they go that idea! I demand COMPENSATION.
Hey time to re-up with soda and coffee at the same
time. I think I can manage making an upwards trip with both as
opposed to having to walk up stairs twice, once with each. Hmm.
Not only might I have to make two upwards trips but that's also an extra...
ONE downwards trip. Not two. Wait a second. Now I'm
confused. Suffice to say I will have to go up and down the stairs
possibly several times all things considered. OKAY I just made
separate trips for coffee and soda. So that sounds like TWO trips,
right? It can't be that easy! I think there's more
complicated math calculations here than what it looks like on the surface!
Anyway. I may MAY have gotten enough soda to last me the entire
week comfortably before re-upping with Super market. ALSO it
helps that I got THREE snapples instead of Two. Helps A LOT.
Kinda makes me wonder why I haven't been doing this all along.
Didn't even OCCUR to me. I couldn't fathom even in my dreams
getting more snapple. HEY SNAPPLE IS CALORIES THAT'S WHY.
Five calories for eight fluid ounces? At this rate I will fill up my
Bathroom Reservoir with Calories in a million years or something! I
lost track whether I care if the little sense this makes is barely enough
sense or not that I'm okay with it or not!
Okay. What else is going on. Owen
Wilson per my memory was in I SPY where he plays some sort of Spy I
Wanna Say. One can only assume that's what threw my Mom off in
thinking he was James Bond. Also one can only assume it's from 2003
and my back-up guess is 2002. LMLTURQ. 2002. Eh
back-up guess isn't so bad. I'm neither proud nor ashamed of getting
it with my back-up guess! It's a good compromise between pride and
shame. 2nd guesses being accurate. What else going on. I
assume I-Spy is some sort of Apple Product which spies on people.
Oh so you mean ALL APPLE PRODUCTS?!?! Gottem. Anyway what
else is going on. I dunno if Apple is singled out as a technology
company that particularly spies on people. I assume all technology
companies spy on people at least moderately. I just don't know if in
popular thought Apple is one of the main offenders. Hey great good
Yeah! Probably gonna take a solid roughly
hour long break after Entry and before next walk. Imagine all I could
accomplish in that time! Off the top of my head the most productive
thing to do would be to watch half or even TWO THIRDS of a movie. I
also briefly thought about watching A Television Show but that's slightly
less productive. Didn't come up with any other alternate idea yet.
Probably never will! That's life! What else is life.
Lots of things. Too many things to cover all of them in this
paragraph. Especially since the paragraph is already half or even TWO
THIRDS done. Hmm. I think it's odd that we had all the
excitement of the last game of the MLB season yesterday and then there's no
playoff game until tomorrow. They're really taking a big risk
that people won't lose interest after one day without a game. I've
already lost half my interest and the day isn't even half over!
Depending on how you measure the day! If it's from 12 AM to 12 AM then
the day is over half over on account of being past noon. So the point
is How Does Major League Baseball Measure Days?
Last paragraph of the day! Wonderful.
I say the day starts when you wake up and ends when you go to sleep!
That's MY hot take. Anyway what else is going on. Just finished
my coffee. It was pretty good! I look forward to having more
tomorrow. Good to have stuff to look forward to! That makes
Present Life relatively tolerable! I can't wait to get blood test
results from Endocrine Appointment. That's another thing to look
forward to. Normally out of 200 or 300 separate Levels Of Stuff
specifically determined I have 2-3 ON AVERAGE things outside the healthy
range. Can't wait to find out how I'm doing This Period Of Three
Months Since Last Time. I'm gonna be honest part of me WANTS to be
outside healthy range of things. It means I'm a REBEL. I go
my own way! Most people want a healthy cholesterol but NOT ME. I
FORGET WHY. I might have said why earlier a few sentences ago but now
I Forget Again. Anyway what else. Hey the entry is over.
See ya later.
October 3, 2021
Hey This Is Relatable
Hello friends. Walked through a big cloud of tobacco smoke today!
I saw it coming and my first instinct was oh no gotta not breathe for a
few seconds I don't wanna become re-addicted! Then my second
thought was I'LL BE FINE lets suck this up have a blast. And I
went with option #2! I didn't have much of a blast nor did I get
re-addicted as far as I know. But it was okay I guess!
Anyway here I am! To write more paragraphs! Got a nice BIG glass
glass going on today. The ones that are 3/4ths the size are all dirty!
Well I wouldn't say DIRTY. I'd say not clean. They're not
covered in mold or anything! Just been used! The point is Oh
no now I'm gonna drink soda at a faster rate. I'm gonna finish the
glasses in the same amount of time no matter how big they are. Oh
well that's part of life. Glass stuff. Yep checks out.
Anyway. Got SNL to watch later! We're talking in the Afternoon!
Watched the Horror Movie Anthology Cats Eye
2 nights ago + yesterday. Pretty okay! I enjoyed it in a
positive sense. Most of the stuff I see I enjoy in a negative sense!
So this was a welcome change of pace. Also that cat in the movie is
CUTE let's talk about it. I wouldn't mind petting HER. Or
HIM. Maybe not if its a HIM. I don't swing that way!
Either way I can't take care of a cat. Too much work! Ya gotta
FEED IT. Ya gotta CLEAN UP ITS SHIT. Ya gotta TUCK IT IN AT
NIGHT. Anyway what else is going on. How come you can train cats
to shit in litter boxes but babies only know how to shit in diapers. A
baby is smarter than a cat! Train that baby to crawl to the litter
box. How hard can this be?! Probably pretty hard or else
everyone would be doing it. Anyway. Then again you don't
want baby to eat litter. Unless it's full of vitamins!!!
Cool! Gonna cut my hair with Papa's assistance in
about a week. Also shave at the same time! Solid half a year
since I last cut my hair with Papa's assistance. Now it's time to
FINISH THE JOB once and for all. Gotta imagine hair will stop
growing after this hair cutting experience to remember. Finally get
the message its not wanted! Then again maybe it will be wanted some day.
Better let it keep growing and I'll cut it if I want so I have OPTIONS in
the future. Anyway My Mom's cousin is having a surprise ZOOM wedding
anniversary surprise party From Family this afternoon. DAMNIT THERE
GOES THE SURPRISE. Also is that my second cousin? My guess?
Maybe! I dunno what it is so I described it to you the only way
I know how! Either way they're old. Also the Wife I
walked in on In Bathroom a few years ago at Christmas Celebration. So
there's that! What kind of idiot has a bathroom without a lock.
My uncle and aunt. Those kinds of idiots!
Oh well that's part of life I guess. Hmm maybe
my Uncle and Aunt owned Psycho's hotel and that's why the lady couldn't lock
her bathroom while taking a shower. Uhh pretty sure Psycho owned
the hotel. That's a main part of the plot. Maybe Psycho owned
the hotel but my Uncle and Aunt were SILENT PARTNERS. Maybe!
We can't say for sure as of now with the information available to us.
We can't even say for sure with some of the information unavailable to us!
I would guess. I don't have that information obviously. What
else is going on. I feel good for The Mets that they get to take a
nice break after today. And those in the Mets Franchise that mostly
work during the season and have time off during the off-season. YOU
EARNED IT have some fun and relax! It makes me happy! Come
back next year RARING to go. RARING? That can't be the right
word. It IS a word according to Microsoft FrontPage which sounds
wrong already. But it ALSO being the right word? Gonna have to
LTURQ. NOPE raring to go IS the right word. I was
confident I was getting it wrong by a letter or two! Should have
trusted my gut instinct. Now I look like a real idiot!
Kind of like before. But now even MORE.
Fifth paragraph already! Coffee after this!
It's Raring to go because it's RARE that you have this much spunk and
enthusiasm and whatnot. To Go! Hmm. I feel like
there was a Dunkin Donuts when I was high school aged that was combined with
a sandwich shop called TOGO because you could get it to go???
And they were both a drive through? And I got it several times on the
way home from high school?? Better LTURQ. TOGO?
Never heard of that in the last 15 years. YEP IT'S REAL.
Not sure if its still there where I think it was. Either way hmm
what kind of sandwich did I used to like from TOGOS. I guess we'll
never know. We don't have a TIME MACHINE where I can go back in time
and find out what sandwich I ordered a dozen times over the course of a
couple of years! Although if we did that's Priority #1! First
things first! Let's get the important stuff out of the way!
Hey time for coffee.
This is good stuff! You may have never heard
of TOGO'S. Now you know better! Also I feel like it took me a
long time to figure out the meaning behind the name. TOGOS what the Hell
is that dumb name was my main thought for most of the time I knew TOGOS.
Then at some magical moment I realized OH RIGHT TO GO. I'm getting
it TO GO. GOTCHA. Isn't all service food to go. You
don't go up to a counter at Mcdonalds and order it and then eat right by the
cash register. Maybe you do! Maybe that's a style some McDonalds
have some places in the world. Sit right up at the counter. It's
not impossible! And it sounds pretty fun! Anyway let's get
cracking on that for New York Locations. Sure.
I've eaten at separate counters at McDonalds. Up
against a window or some other sort of wall. Just not right where the
cashiers are! Oh well that's life. HEY there must be a
Blunder Years Episode II at this point! Forgot all about that! I
liked the first episode because it makes ya THINK. What's this all
about Hmm I Wonder. Anyway what else is going on. Maybe
watch more Da God's Honest Truth with Rapist Magillicutty. HEY
THAT'S NOT FAIR. He's only been CREDIBLY ACCUSED of rape. I
haven't seen all the facts yet! Haven't seen any of the facts yet!
I don't even remember his name! Apparently I think it's magillicutty!
And his first name is Rapist?!?! What would the odds of that be?
What with him turning out to be a rapist. VERY unlikely. Anyway
I have no interest in Wedding Anniversary Party. But my Mom said she
might need me to help her set up joining the zoom meaning. Finally
it's ME TO THE RESCUE. I get to be a productive re: Helping
Eighth paragraph! Wonderful. Yesterday
Mom seemed to be 95% better than before when she was very under the weather.
Great! That'll show the booster shot for trying to make her feel bad!
The jokes on YOU in the end! Huh? Oh, right. What
else. I still feel like the area around my Flu Shot is 2-5% sore.
Oh well that's how you know it's working! Also I would have assumed
its working anyway. That's why I got it! What else is going
on. I tried watching an episode of Tales From The Cryptkeeper
which is a cartoon spin-off of Tales From The Crypt for children. But
it features the Cryptkeeper's Real Voice! Anyway I watched a solid 5
minutes of one episode (4 of which were an introduction by The Cryptkeeper)
and I couldn't get into it! I thought even if it's not for adults the
plots would be interesting. But this first 60 seconds of a story had
nothing interesting in it plotwise! See you in HELL Tales From The
What else is going on. Ninth paragraph.
What a wonderful world we live in. Where I can already be up to the
ninth paragraph for the day. So little left relatively speaking!
Then again I haven't written very good paragraphs so far it feels like.
So I'm deep into a BAD entry. Which is bad because I have less time to
turn it around! Then again ya get what you pay for. NOTHIN'.
Sounds about right. Maybe you should be paying me. I can put
this behind a pay wall! Gotta imagine it's POSSIBLE I would solidly
get 1 or 2 Pity Subscriptions from family. Even if they don't read
this. I'd have to let them know specifically some other way there's a
pay wall for website and I'd appreciate their engagement. Otherwise
they'd never even know it's a possibility to take pity on me with
subscriptions! Anyway what else is going on. Gotta
imagine my Mom's I wanna say 83 year old cousin whose married for 50
years is reading this and is chomping at the bit to give me a pity
subscription! In which case SORRY ABOUT RUINING THE SURPRISE PARTY.
Gotta imagine this entry, "Drops," roughly 45 minutes before it happens.
WHY OH WHY couldn't I have waited another hour to Publish?!!?
Last paragraph of the act! What else is going
on. I feel like this guy was in World War II. That would make
him more than 82. Maybe he was in Korean War. Either way there's
no way of knowing. He can't have been in World War II. He's
not A HUNDRED. Anyway what else is going on. Ya know what?
Maybe he was in Korean War but was stationed in Europe for some reason.
Huh? Why? I dunno that's the army's business not mine!
What else is going on. Need some army stationed in Europe during
Korean War! What if Europeans get the wrong idea. See Korea
being at war and are like HEY WE WANT IN ON THAT. Then my Mom's
cousin is there to violently suppress any civil uprisings. Sounds
about right. Speaking of my Mom's cousin and Cats, we got our cat
from My Mom's cousin! He was a veterinarian or something.
Probably veterinarian. But somewhat possible something else to do with
animals and pets. Anyway we were in the market for a cat and he gave
us one that he had gotten as a stray somehow! Half a year old!
So that's great. I feel like he got her off the highway. That
might have just been in my imagination. When I heard she was a stray I
just pictured her on a highway running perpendicularly successfully avoiding
getting run over. Hey great that's great. I'm gonna take
a walk now.
My Website Get Your Own
WHAT DO YOU MEAN MAGILLICUTTY ISN'T A WORD. Any word that
starts with a capital letter is a word. Could be a last name!
Who the Hell are you to pass judgment on last names. You can get in
serious legal trouble by besmirching someone's name! Also I'm talking
to Microsoft FrontPage. Not you. This isn't your fault.
You're an innocent bystander in all of this! Great just great.
Are Magillccutties females? I feel like if you're using a generic last
name Magillicutty that might be a feminine last name. What
the Hell is a feminine last name. Magillicutty! Oh okay I
see. Also I'm spelling this different each time I say it.
By not trying to spell it consistently at all! Just letting my fingers
do the talking without much input from my brain each time. Anyway what
else is going on. It's possible we will finally get Paper Towels
today. Alright sure. That's a good story. It is!
Now in Future Times I can return to this entry and remember oh right my
life revolved around accepting paper towel delivery. Now that I read
this it rings some sort of bell.
Also THEY will ring MY front door bell when it's
here! Probably! Solid 25% chance they won't! Anyway what
else is going on. Also that's my only door bell! On the front
door! We had one bell as a family and we decided to hook it up to
front door. I feel it was the right decision. Pays off all
the time! Great. Do I have TOGO any place this upcoming week.
I don't think so. Oh well that's life. GOOD life.
Why bother going places when you can not go places. Unless that place
is a combination Dunkin Donuts and Sandwich Shop. Hey maybe one of
you wants a donut. The other of you wants a sandwich. Until now
you'd be up a creek without a river! Unless you get a sandwich
from Dunkin Donuts. Gotta imagine they serve half a dozen different
sandwiches not even counting breakfast sandwiches. And if you count
breakfast sandwiches gotta imagine they serve 16-18 sandwiches. BUT
this was 15 years ago. 15 years ago Dunkin Donuts might have served
maybe 2 breakfast sandwiches and 0 other sandwiches. And possibly ZERO
sandwiches in the middle of the day. It was a simpler time when fast
food restaurants knew their place. Now they wall wanna cover all the
bases and be something they're not. Stick to the basics! Do what
you know! Great this paragraph is solidly over.
Yeah! Watching more The Sampsons. I
like how I'm halfway into season 15 and I'm solidly up to the point where
I'm like well these are all recent episodes. Not from my childhood.
From my adulthood. I feel like this debuted 4 years ago.
These are from 17 years ago. But it still feels fresh and new!
I blame the COLORS. I don't know why. I really do, though!
I feel like the strange bright colors are mixing me up in my head re: How
Time Works. And what is recent and what is not. And what recent
means and doesn't mean. Anyway that's life I guess. Oh well.
Gotta imagine the more years the pass the more Simpsons Voices will die.
At some point they're gonna have to close down the show when enough people
are dead. OR they can do the Looney Tunes thing and re-cast dead
people with living voiceover character imitators. Hey great they
got options good for them.
Penultimate paragraph of act II! Wonderful.
Or each time a voice dies they replace those characters with new characters.
So overtime we transition to completely new characters but SLOWLY. So
we don't even notice. It's a few characters here and there!
Until some point where there's no more Simpsons. And it's all
Millhouses or something. Current Millhouse's grandkids.
They're the main characters by 2070. You heard it here first.
Presumably Lisa would be the grandmother in that situation, right? You
want SOME link to The Simpsons Themselves. Makes a lot of sense in my
book. Hmm gonna have to start a new book. This current one
isn't so great. Things that don't make sense in reality make sense in
the book. What a worthless book. Anyway what else is going
on. Also yes I know the first 33 seasons of The Simpsons absolutely no
time has passed. But this all changed in 2027! Hmm if
Millhouse is 10 in 2027 and starts aging normally a year at a time he will
only be 53 in 2070. A little young for grand children. You'd
think so wouldn't you. Huh.
Maybe he ages TWO years at a time. Ever think
of that Hot Shot?! Anyway I got one more paragraph to write before
bathing. Wonderful! Maybe my Mom's cousin was in the Veterinary
Core In Korean War Stationed In Europe. Makes sense. Someone's
gotta train and care for Attack Dogs. Hmm if they're in Europe they
should probably have Defense Dogs not Attack Dogs. Then again the
best defense is a good offense. What else is going on. How much
of a Veterinarian's job is Putting Down Animals. 50%? Gotta
imagine half he time they're either like well this animal can't be saved
and/or sometimes well this animal PROBABLY could be saved but not really
worth the hassle. Either way every other animal they gotta kill.
Most people think when they're kids they wanna be a veterinarian because
they love animals. Probably should be the other way around! The
main thing you do is kill animals so it's better if you go into that career
being on board with that aspect. Hmm gonna have to ask Mom's Cousin
about this on Zoom. Theoretically. Not in practice. I
Won't Attend At All in practice.
Fine We Can Share The Website
Got some snapple going. Gonna have coffee next paragraph.
GREAT we're all caught up. Tomorrow is my Brother's Birthday.
He's turning OLD. That seems to happen every year! I
can't remember the last time he had a birthday and I was like hey he
seems YOUNGER now. I guess that's the direction life goes for all
of us. Most of us. Not those with Benjamin Button Disorder.
That's gotta be really rare though so it's not even something we need to
take into account for the most part. Anyway. I shaved about 4
months ago. Not completely! Mostly! The setting on Shaving
Razor that came with Haircutting Apparatus only goes down to Very Close
Shave. No setting for Complete Shave! Seems like a big
oversight. How hard could it have been to just add One More
Setting-- Complete Hair Removal. Either way Close Enough! I'll
survive and whatnot. Unless I slit my throat by accident. Gotta
imagine there's a 5% chance that happens. Oh well you gotta take
risks if you wanna win big in life. Huh.
Yeah! What else is going on. Gonna start
doing sit ups and push ups every day. Specifically sit ups. Feel
that would contour my belly appearance as I lose the final 10-15 pounds.
Based on NOTHING but thinking hey that kinda makes sense in my head.
Solidly 20% chance that's how things might work physiologically.
Couldn't hurt. Maybe it could hurt. Probably won't,
though! What else is going on. Not gonna take a walk until
roughly an hour from this moment. Gotta help parents watch ZOOM.
It involves them entering TWO SEPARATE NUMBERS that's too complicated for
them. Meeting ID number? PASSWORD? Look one number is one
thing but two numbers is literally 100% more complicated. That's
the most amount more complicated it could be! What if it was three
numbers. That'd be 200% more complicated. YOU CAN'T HAVE MORE
THAN 100% WHERE THE HELL DID YOU LEARN MATH.
Wonderful. I can solidly watch The Blunder
Years Episode II To Remember after Entry and before Helping Out With Zoom.
PROBABLY. If I have to watch commercials then it's a little bit of a
tighter fit. But if I don't then very easy to fit it in!
YEAH. Get off my back about it. A little confused why
Michael Soprano isn't playing young Don Cheadle in the show, though.
Seems kind of strange that they'd go in a different direction than that.
Did I say Michael Soprano by accident or on purpose? It was by
accident! Now you know the horrifying truth. Ugh.
Did I watch seven minutes of Major League: Back To The Minors POSSIBLY
FROM 1997 after bathing while drying off? Yes yes I did.
Backup guess is 1999. Third guess is 1998. Let's LTURQ!
OH NO IT WAS 1998. I just BARELY got it with my third guess but that's
not something to be proud of at all. Well there goes my pride.
Gone now once and for all. DAMNIT I hate it when that happens.
Penultimate paragraph. I guess after that
blunder of a guess I'M going back to the minors! The minors of
people who compete to determine what years movies were released as some sort
of contest competing competition. Hey good news I MADE IT TO THE
TRIPLE A. That's the highest in the minors you can be! Why,
if the major league team suffers a dozen injuries in one night I can easily
be called up until half of those injured players are ready to return!
ALRIGHT now we're talking! What else is going on. Thinking
about interesting breakfasts I can have when I'm done dieting to lose
weight. And my breakfasts will be 2.5 times larger than current
breakfast. Could be A SLICE OF PIZZA. Could be a single LARGE
DONUT. Those are two of the most, "Out There," but, "Reasonably
Possible," ideas I had. I'd come up with a third one but I don't
feel like it right now. Hmm.
Last paragraph of the day. Cool! I have
lots of other Breakfast Ideas but they're more reasonable. Donut is
a reasonable breakfast. Lots of dumb people will have a donut for
breakfast. Good point. It's as dumb as pizza but presumably
much more common! Anyway. HEY Paper towels just arrived.
In a box! Big box! Even bigger than I was expecting. Also
LIGHT BIG BOX. That's the best kind of big box there is. Re:
Heaviness of it! What else is going on. Gotta imagine
there's one to two more things going on to write about for the rest of the
entry. I'm leaning towards ONE thing but that's still pretty good.
Anyway. No more chores for the day! other than walking, eating,
sit ups and push ups. And Ultimately Sleeping. And Watching TV.
Basically everything I have to do is a chore but it's all worth it because I
get to do it again tomorrow. Hmm. Okay I'll be back
October 2, 2021
I Don't Have Time For This
What's up friends. It's me again! A.K.A the guy you were
probably expecting. One day someone else will write a surprise
entry. I estimate in 18 years. It will take me roughly 15
years to make a friend and 3 years to set into motion the conditions that
lead him to writing an entry. OR HER. No reasons ladies
can't write entries. Or be my friend! Hmm some good reason
it'd be hard to get a lady to be my friend. Well this is in 15
years. Who knows what life will be like in 15 years. I DO.
It will be roughly 2036. THAT'S what life will be like.
Sounds about right. HEY I watched The Sopranos movie. And I had
a Sopranos dream before waking up! I don't remember exactly what
happened but I feel it involved Young But Not Too Young Tony Soprano
RUNNING and or IN A CAR. He was in transport somehow.
This is the dream. Not the movie.
Solid chance he's running in the movie. I can think
of at least one scene where he's In Transport. Anyway pretty good
movie! I agree with the makers that it would have been better In
Theater. Oh well I watched it on THE HOME Box Office. Maximum!
That's pretty convenient! Anyway I feel bad for Michael Gandolfini
because he did a good job but not an AMAZING job. So what should
critics say? They can't gush over him but they can't say it was a let
down either. Wait a second. I don't feel bad for Michael
Gandolfini. I feel bad for the critics! Either way I give him a
SEVEN POINT FOUR out of 10. Amazing. Which is still very
good for a nice young adult man like him. It was good enough I can
easily see him getting more roles! So again No Worries for Michael
Gandolfini, and A Lot of sympathy for film critics. Also I'm not
100% sure what this film was about.
Maybe if I was paying more attention I'd know.
Oh it's about referencing The Future. That's part of it!
The best part! What else is going on. The Sopranos future.
Who cares about The Earth's Future A.K.A the present A.K.A also more
accurately The Earth's Future from the 2000's. Huh. Mom
definitely seemed healthier yesterday. That's good news. Because
it's easier on me! Less worries FOR ME. Good stuff!
Happy with when I woke up and got up and ended up at this point in the day.
It's a nice solid time right now for where I'm at in the day! That's a
great recurring subject. WHEN DID I WAKE UP AND HOW DO I FEEL ABOUT
IT. Last few days I woke up pretty early and I feel GREAT about
it. Now you know! What times have you been waking up and
how does that make you feel? E-mail me at mankindguy at gmail dot com.
That's my real e-mail not a joke e-mail! You could probably have
guessed that based on there being no Jokey Elements! I wanna hear
about your mornings send in them e-mails.
What else. HMM what are the top 5 standard
most popular e-mail domains. Gmail feels like a classic over the last
decade and a half. What else is up there. OUTLOOK is number
one? I dunno about that. I thought outlook was a program
where you can read all your e-mail accounts together. I guess they
also have their own e-mail account service. Good for them.
Anyway any other stand outs in the top 10??? AOL Mail still clocking
in at number 7. Great. The other ones I don't care about.
Well there were a few that were funny words I never heard before.
Those were Zoho and Yandex. First I thought Yandex was
funny and Zoho wasn't that funny then I realized Zoho is pretty funny and
Yandex is also still funny so they're both funny. Good topics.
This is great! What kind of email domains do you use. Send
me e-mails specifying in the subject line AND in the main content of the
e-mail what the domain of your e-mail address is. So I know what the
e-mail domain is TWO WAYS. AND ONLY TWO WAYS.
Last paragraph before coffee! Which is pretty
good because I Like Getting Done With Things. Makes me happy!
How did people use e-mail before the internet? Must have been pretty
tough. They could get e-mail sent directly to their house. A
hard copy of the e-mail. Oh that sounds convenient. Now I'm
wondering how people get hard copies of E-mail nowadays through e-mail.
They get soft copies sent electronically over the internet. Oh
okay. Never heard the term soft copies before. Never
heard a lot of things before! This is one example. All mail is
Electronic Mail once the mail hearses or whatever they're called are
electric vehicles. In ESSENCE the electricity is getting your mail
there. Wow what a crazy future. I feel like I used to get
regular mail from friends. Honestly. Definitely stuff like
birthday party invitations and well wishes for your birthday party.
That was standard. But I also feel like a few times it was just like
HEY WHAT'S UP. And this is from people I see in school every day.
Anyway that's great.
My Dad pitched to me an idea of how I could justify
getting Booster Shot. I could just say I live with 2 elderly people, 1
immunocompromised, and I am Some Sort Of CAREGIVER. Which is
partly true. I give some care. Partly! Theoretically I
mean. FEELINGwise I partly care. Tangibly I'm not so sure but
either way sure whatever I guess what else is going on. I'd get shot
if it didn't require me to justify myself at all. Once I start having
to argue in my favor I feel like that's too much of a hassle! What
else is going on. Sixth paragraph! I don't believe it. What kind
of fun stuff do I have in store for today. There's a new Saturday
Night Life tonight! Past my bedtime! Watch that sucker tomorrow
afternoon. What can I do before my bed time though. That's the
real question! Hmm. Watch some sort of FILM?
I'm a fan of FILM. I like the part where they talk to each
other and I can sort of tune out. They're not talking to me.
I don't need to pay too much attention! Their dialogue will continue
no matter how much or how little I'm invested in it!
What else is going on. Finished The Ringing II.
Finished The Road To Them Perditions. Finished a third movie yesterday
specifically one would imagine. Not including movies I also started
yesterday. Hmm. That might be it! Oh well that's
still a pretty good accomplishment. Anyway what is going on in the
wide world of sports. Once all playoff spots are settled in Major
League Baseball I will determine which teams I am rooting for in relation to
how much I am rooting for the other teams. Either rank them from most
rooting for to least rooting for overall, or look at each individual series
and pick a team to root for specifically for that series.
INTERESTING. The 2nd way is more intuitive but the 1st way is also
more intuitive. Either way I feel like the 2nd way is more STANDARD
and the way you would go about it PROBABLY but the first is not without its
charms! Either way what's going on? Oh right. While
I was typing Major League Baseball I thought of Major Motion
Pictures and briefly thought maybe I could figure out some sort of dumb
thing to say making that connection. Oh well too late now.
Eighth paragraph! I don't believe it! I
feel like for years I've been reading articles about how shitty Minor
Leaguerses lives are. At some point gotta imagine they'd address that,
right? I'd imagine that sure. It's fun! What else
is going on. Pretty sure I've never been to a Minor League Baseball
Game. Hmm. I think there's a Staten Island Yankees team which I
may have gone to once? Better LTURQ. There were Staten Island
Yankees team from 1999 to 2020. Nah that can't be it can it?
I was thinking before 1999. BUT 1999-2002 IS on the upper end of
possibilities of when and if this may or may not have possibly or impossibly
taken place or not taken place. So I got going for me.
Hmm any other sports I've seen. Professional Major League Sports.
Nothing comes to mind! Makes sense. I don't think it was the
case. If it's not the case of course nothing will come to mind!
Then again I dunno this paragraph is over Isn't That Enough For You?!?
Penultimate paragraph of the Act! What a
wonderful day today is turning out to be. I'm solidly accomplishing
the same Bulk Amount Of Writing as every other day. SURE it's worse
than most days and most days are worse than you'd want in the first place
HOWEVER it's still SOMETHING. Kind of. You might not even
consider it Something. I DO THOUGH. Wonderful. How
easy is it to get into the groove of reading the entries. That's what
I've been wondering the last couple of days. It's one thing to think
about whether it's funny or not or entertaining or not or anything like
that. On a more basic level-- is it DIFFICULT to go from sentence to
sentence on account of it Not Being Well Thought Out and Stream Of
Conciousnesslike? In which case OH NO. Then again on the
other case ALRIGHT NOT BAD. In the third case This Is What I
mean these sentences make no sense! Oh well too late to go back
now. Not too late to start Trying Harder To Make Sense.
Yeah you'd think so wouldn't you.
Last paragraph of the act! Also I get excited
in Writing about things you don't care about. I'm genuinely thrilled
it's the last paragraph of the act! So much that I have to exclaim it
explicitly! You can just skip over those sentences because Who Cares.
Oh well what else is going on. Maybe you get off on my explicit
exclamations about how far I am into the entry. In which case that's
great news we're both coming out on top! YEAH. My mom is
encouraging me to buy new clothes for my updated body type. Shirts and
stuff! I feel like I'm supposed to start wearing shirts that aren't
t-shirts. Adults don't wear short sleeve t-shirts every day that may
or may not say stuff and or have cool designs. But what kind of shirts
DO they wear? Well this is easy LONG sleeve t-shirts.
Also Winter is coming. Winter is definitely the season for long sleeve
t shirts! Also they're called t shirts because they form a T
when worn properly. Just like every other shirt. OH well.
Hey that's it for now. Be back soon!
Now Wait Just A Minute
Hello friends. Time to write more paragraphs. That happens
ALL THE TIME. Especially early in the day! Then there tends
to be a break in the paragraphs the 2nd 2/3rds of the day. WOW if only
that time was now! It will be soon! I like those odds!
Anyway what else is going on. Gonna take a shower today! I'm not
100% sure why I feel so strongly about this but I do. It's time to mix
things up and whatnot. Also why couldn't Psycho Victim just lock her
bathroom door while showering. Maybe Psycho rigged the door so
there is no lock. No way of knowing if that's explicitly referred to
in the movie. Well no way of knowing without watching the
movie. How about asking someone who watched the movie. Some
sort of Film Historian. I don't know any Film Historians!
You Don't?!?! WHY NOT?!?! Anyway I got that going on for me.
I feel like I know 70% of The History Of Film. I know ALL the most
popular Titles. Many of the most popular actors and even some
directors. Basically 70% of EVERYTHING I already know.
Wow 70%? That's a C-! Not sure about
that. Could be a D+! I'm rounding up to a C-. I'm a C-.
Sure why not. Also my area of expertise is What Year Films Were
Released. Again, do I know all of it? NO! But do I know
more than your standard person? YES MUCH MORE! 1991 for
example. LOTS of films released in 1991. Well I'm
impressed! Anyway what else is going on. If Back To The
Future Present Year was This Year the past year would have been 1991.
Thirty years ago. WAIT A SECOND that can't be right. I'm
a teenager NOW and I can REMEMBER 1991 completely. Something
in this math doesn't add up. I vaguely remember 1991. Gotta
imagine I watched some TV as a 2 year old. Hmm rings some sort of
bell. Anyway what else is going on! Also gotta imagine I
round down to a 17 year old instead of rounding up to a 46 or 47 year old,
however old The Adult Class is in Back To The Future. COULD BE 48
YEARS OLD. WOW!!!!!
Great! Just great! Wait a second I'm
legitatemly in the middle! Fifteen years either way. I was
going into this premise assuming yeah I probably am closer to adult than
teenager. Now I see the error of my ways. I'M AS CLOSE TO
TEENAGER AS ADULT. This is the best news I've gotten ALL MORNING.
Also the only news. Except for the e-mail domain names of Wazoo and
Yuckle. Those are new to me too! What else is going on.
The idea of that is that a year before Back To The Future Present takes
place, Marty McFly's parents weren't QUITE adults yet. They didn't
exactly mature into adults until they turned 47. YEAH THAT SOUNDS
FAIR. Get off my back about it. You're no adult until you're
47! I think that sounds about right. We just need a new
word for 22-46 year olds. THE BEST people how about that.
YEAH! Also sure 20 and 21 year olds are
still teenagers. They're ZEROTEEN and ELEVENTEEN. I feel
very strongly about this. Well great this is the penultimate
paragraph of the act. I'm no caregiver to my parents. I
am very much a careTAKER. I give them 5% of care and they give me 50%
of care. That's a surplus of 45% care going in MY direction not
theirs. Hmm if I need care doesn't that essentially theoretically
qualify me for vaccine. I'VE GOT PROBLEMS THUS GIMME THAT BOOSTER
SHOT. That's the premise I'm currently operating under. What
else is going on. I think I MAY be rooting for the Los Angeles Los
Algenelers in the major league baseball 2021 playoffs to remember. Los
Angels DODGERS there we go. Not sure why. I just have a gut
feeling sure why not them makes sense.
HEY final paragraph of the act! This just flew by
didn't it. YES it flew by for Me The Reader because I just skimmed
it quickly looking for anything worthwhile and I Saw Nothing so it took NO
TIME AT ALL!!! Hey great I'm glad things are working out for you.
YEAH. Figure I'll enjoy the shower. Try to set the water
heat level at something I'm comfortable with. Off the top of my head,
something I don't feel is too hot AND something I don't feel is too cold.
Seems like the way to go. You heard it here first. Err on
the side of Too Hot though. Is that standard? Gotta imagine
that's 80% of how people approach shower heat levels. Better
slightly too hot than too cold. I don't know why I have to imagine
that. That's the case for me! And I'm a trendsetter re: Shower
Heat Levels so if I'm doing it everyone is gonna wanna copy me! Anyway
I'll be back in a little bit.
I Enjoy A Good Title
Hey! Took a shower. Just as I predicted. I was mostly
comfortable with Heat Level Of Water. So comfortable with it I
capitalized it 15 minutes later while writing it just now! Anyway
great just great. Today is a Halloween Marathon on Television.
That I sort of get! It's roughly a month away true however it's the
same month! The point is people are too confused and angry about the
third Halloween not being about Michael Myers. LOOK they wanted to do
an anthology thing briefly with the franchise. Makes total sense!
What's your problem! Get off their back about it just because they
changed their minds. WHO CARES NOT ME. Hopefully I turn out
to be a trendsetter whether people care about Halloween III being about
something else. Someone's gotta Set Trends For Good! Anyway
I'm gonna re-up with coffee after the next sentence. This sentence,
the one right here and now!
My Mom is downstairs and watching TV! I know the
Looney Tunes were Back In Action in 2003 but now My Mom is back in action
in... this year... I wanna say 2021? Also yep I knew Looney
Tunes Back In Action is from 2003 accurately! Never saw the movie!
Most people probably don't even know such a movie exists! I barely
know! Still knew instinctively what year its from! Anyway what
else is going on. Gonna take a pretty long break between Entry and Walk III.
We're talkin a solid hour, hour 15 minutes. Wow SOLID? I would
have been happy with a semi-hard hour or hour 15 minutes. Completely
solid though? Wonderful! Anyway today coffee is similar to
yesterday such that I left over some of 1st coffee an just added however
much was left in the cup for 2nd cup on top of that. That's an easy
enough story to convey. I feel like I could have done better, though.
Off the top of my head I might have used Words And Grammars Wrongly such
that it's hard to understand. Oh well that's life.
Third paragraph of the Act III! I think I jus
heard my mom clapping. I hope it was in approval to something and
not her doing some other sort of Practical Clapping. Or maybe it was
something else entirely. STILL though I'm pretty excited about the
prospect of her being enthusiastically approving of something.
Probably good news for the rest of us, too! Anyway great sure.
Presumably something she saw on the television. Not sure what in real
life would cause her to clap. OKAY GREAT I DON'T CARE.
You should care. This effects you, too! If its good for my Mom
it's good for All Of Us! Whatever. What else is going on.
Maybe she heard my accurate prediction of The Looney Tunes Being Back IN
Action being in 2003 and heard it on a delay. And she was applauding
me. Can't hurt to dream. Alternatively maybe she didn't
hear it on a delay but her clapping was on a delay. Oh okay that's
another way this could be explained.
Penultimate paragraph! Do they sell long
sleeve shirts over the internet. I can only imagine them selling short
sleeve t-shirts. Wow my imagination isn't great at all.
In some respects that's accurate. Like this respect.
Anyway. I saw a Harlem Globetrotters game once. That's not
official basketball league, though! I've been to Medieval Times a
couple of times. They have some sort of sporting competition but again
there's no official league set-up. Something to do with JOUSTING.
Not sure what jousting is. I think jousting may be Fencing While On
Horses. Off the top of my head that's what I'm imagining. Also
you're not just both on horses standing next to each other and fencing.
You're making your horses RUN RIGHT AT EACH OTHER and then make a single
Fencing Move or two when the other person gets close. Also how much
credit does Winning Jousting go to the horses? 30%? Gotta
imagine they're getting partial credit for the win.
Anyway I may be describing Something Else. What
else is going on. Also gotta imagine Medieval Times jousting is
staged. Oh well that's life. Hmm you eat CHICKEN at Medieval
Times. I'd eat some chicken right now. I'm not ashamed to
admit it! What else is going on. Also at Medieval Times are we
theoretically supposed to be like royalty or Lords or something watching the
action. Or are we regular peasants who somehow finagled their way into this
activity. Gotta imagine in real life normally peasants can't afford to
watch stuff like this. Only for the ruling class! Either way
what else is going on. We don't have time to start a new subject.
There's Only Several Sentences Left! Yeah! That sounds
great! What a wonderful world and whatnot. Hey I'll be back
October 1, 2021
That Means A Lot
Hey! Time to write some more. Woke up today feeling kind of
fluish. And I still do an hour later! Combine that with my Mom
being on her deathbed for the last 3 days and maybe there's a covid outbreak
in my crapshack! I dunno about that. Mom and Dad have TRIPLE
SHOOTERS. And I'm ME The Guy Who Nothing Bad Could Ever Happen To.
Also I feel sore where I got the flu shot yesterday so maybe that's related.
I feel SICK from FLU SHOT. It could happen why not seems plausible
to me. Anyway this paragraph has been A BARREL of laughs so far.
Hmm. What are barrels good for. Off the top of my head
they're ammunition for Donkey Kong AND can store beverages. Anyway to
close out this paragraph in an uninteresting way when I checked home scale
today it was 2 pounds higher than yesterday but 1 pound lower than I was
expecting and .5 pounds higher than what I would have expected based on
Endocrine Weight Check yesterday. All in all GREAT FINE I GUESS
WOW. I got Super market delivery
coming up soon. Could be as soon as an hour. Could be as late as
NEVER. The driver dies. And if a driver dies while in transit to
your crapshack they just give up the order for some reason. That
seems wrong. They should get another driver in there to finish the
delivery. Yes it's sad this guy is dead now but I still need me
groceries either way! YEAH. Dunno whether I should tell
my parents I feel fluish. Might upset them! Maybe give it
another half a day and then recalibrate. If I still feel sick later
today I'm bringing it up! YEAH. FIVE TWO HUH.
You know what that means! Ideal weight is 2 pounds higher than it
would be if I was Five One And A Half. Hmm I'd eat some chocolate
candy right now. Dunno where that came from. It just popped
into my mind! A miniature chocolate bar. Like an Assorted
Hersheys Bag. Any one of 'em! Except for one of them.
I feel like in the Assorted Hershey Mini Candy Bar bag there's one I'm not a
fan of. Better LTURQ. MR. GOOD BAR. How ironic!
They say it's good and I say it's bad. Also they say it's Mister
but I SAY it's Missus. All the clues are there!
Anyway. It is A Bar though. No questioning
that! So they're 1/3rd accurate which is halfway there I guess.
HEY I get to drink coffee relatively soon. That's a blast and a half.
Anyway. Internet confirms that you can feel fluish after flu shot.
So I went ahead and updated my Mother that I Feel Sick Too. Now we
can relate to each other! Nice Mother-Son relationship.
HEALTHY Mother-Son relationship. Why did I feel it was necessary to
specify it's healthy. Because I know what's on your mind! You
think my relationship with my Mother-Son is unhealthy! But now you
know better. That settles that. I CAN'T WAIT TO TELL M YDAD
ABOUT MY FLUISHNESS. He's downstairs now so he hasn't heard the
good news. Have you heard the good news about the good news.
No But I Assume It's Good News. Nailed it.
Ugh. Sure I have no soda right now but the
good news about the good news is that there's good news which is I will have
more soda very soon after Super market delivery is delivered.
Also perhaps the corpse of the driver who died halfway here! Hmm
for me to get the corpse he must have died VERY close to the house.
Like literally right in front of the house. Otherwise why would the
corpse come into my possession? Doesn't make sense! The point is
I assume Fresh Direct Truck is partially or fully refrigerated/freezered so
he's basically halfway there to being preserved until a future time where we
can defrost him and he's alive and kicking. Either that or we can eat
him as a snack after dinner. Ice cream snack. Frozen foods.
Get with the program. What program. If you have to ask
you clearly don't know. ACCURATE. 1000% ACCURATE. If
you have to ask about something you clearly don't know!
What else is going on and crap. This is the first
day of October, commonly known as the month which culminates in Halloween
which is the best day of the year. Gotta imagine Halloween ranks in
the top 5 days of the year if you did a poll of all people. By which I
mean all AMERICANS. Otherwise known as The BEST People.
Either way I was briefly thinking about LURQ polls of Favorite Days Of The
Year but then I realized I don't care and I hope there is no info on the
internet and most importantly some things are better left to the
imagination. Sure what else is going on. I lost track of
whether I said anything worthwhile so far this entry. I feel like off
the top of my head I've said 4 things halfway worthwhile and 6 things a
quarter worthwhile. How many Worthwhiles does that add up to. Three
and a half worthwhiles. Right? Lemme double check that.
Yep sounds right. WOW that's not bad all in all!
Wonderful. I'm as of saying Wonderful
over 50% into Act I. And there's three Acts overall.
Wow per my calculations I'm HALFWAY THERE. What else is going on.
Endocrine Doctor encouraged me to throw out clothes that I wore when I was
overweight. What's her problem. Easy to say that when you're not
paying for the clothes! Also I can still wear the same clothes.
They're just not super tight on me! And/or they're NOW super big on
me! Yeah. YEAH. I should have made the most of the
moment when she said to throw out my clothes and gone No Time Like The
Present! and ripped off all my clothes male-stripper-like and started
dancing. Male-stripper-like dancing! Also I feel male strippers
rip off their clothes more than female strippers. Female strippers go
into the situation wearing very little clothes. Wait a second.
Strippers. It's IN THE NAME that they're stripping. That's the
DEFINING QUALITY of what they do. Shows how much I know!
Seventh paragraph. Not sure if I've ever seen
strippers in real life. Well of course I have. I've walked
around places a lot. I'd see a stripper here and there. Just
not actively stripping! I would have probably remembered that.
You'd think so wouldn't you. Anyway. I think my Mom is doing
a little bit better today. Based on Me Hoping That's The Case.
YEAH. OH HEY time to flip the Patriotism Calendar page.
THINE ALABASTER CITIES GLEAM. What the hell does that mean.
I never heard that before. Also cities aren't Patriotism.
They're not THE REAL America. Also I don't know what alabaster means!
I think it's some kind of rock. Is this a reference to The Rock
starring Ed Harris Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage? Either way it's a
picture of some sort of city with short sky scrapers. And there's a
big metal statue of a bean or something. I dunno what that is and
frankly I think I'm better off not knowing.
Hmm any Patriotism days coming up? Columbus
Day on the 11th! Solid Patriotism Day. That appears to be it.
YEAH. For some reason two entirely separate channels were showing
Friday The XIII marathons yesterday. A premium channel and an extended
basic cable channel. And I tried and tried and couldn't come up with
anyway that yesterday was Friday The XIII. Hmm I guess we'll
never get to the bottom of this! Maybe we will one day.
Can't hurt to dream! Hey right now I already feel more or less
not fluish. Yeah! HEY Super Market Delivery order
just game. And I accepted it! And put necessary stuff away!
Also Delivery Driver was alive and/or kicking. So that's good news for
him. Not so good news for us but oh well. If he was dead I
assume we get custody of the body. Which we can use one way or another
to our benefit. Hmm. Way ahead of schedule for today what
with early delivery and all. Wow there's a schedule AND I'm
ahead of it? That's amazing!
Ninth paragraph. Great. Arm is only sore
around flu shot when I flex it. Which is often! I gotta flex my
muscles otherwise who would be impressed by my muscles. Not sure I
have muscles. I know I'm able to move my arm around which suggests
there's some muscles there but there's very little evidence otherwise.
Either way arms are slightly skinnier than they were 37 pounds ago!
THAT'LL LEARN 'EM. I never even finished my 1 glass of water I had
this morning. I was able to re-up with soda before an entire glass of
water. It's a charmed life we live. And by we I mean me.
And by life I mean thing. And by charm I mean what. Huh.
Only one MLB playoff spot is left in contention. Well two. Two
American League wild cards. Yep Two Things is solidly Two and Not
One. Either way I'm rooting for the Seattle Mariners because
they're not really a good team and I like an underdog. Also because
Ken Griffey Jr played for them and I'm not one to argue with Ken Griffey Jr.
Also Seattle is as close to GRUNGE as any Major League Baseball Team
Is. Wow GRUNGE? NOW you're talking my language!
Last paragraph of the act! Amazing. Ugh.
What's the counter to Columbus Day. Is it just called In, "Diggin'
Us!," Peoples' Day? I think there's a solid 80% chance that's what
the day is called ad a counter to calling it Columbus Day. YEP I
WAS RIGHT. I'm right all the time. I'm right roughly 80% of
the time! Amazing. Indigenous people Dig Themselves burial
grounds. ANCIENT burial grounds. Supernatural, too!
Anyway did they go into digging the burial grounds with the premise that one
day they will be ancient and that's really what they're going for? My
guess? No of course not. Also my supplemental guess is
that there's no such thing as Ancient Indian Burial Grounds. They
froze their dead in Fresh Direct Trucks. Anyway what else is going on.
Sopranos movie is theoretically available now! Probably watch that
later today. Maybe save it for NIGHTTIME. Wow a time that
takes place at night? Now I've got my attention! Anyway I'll
be back soon.
I Can't Hear You
Make some noise! Hey I'm here to write five paragraphs. Got some soda
going. Sprite Zero! So I wouldn't get confused transitioning
from water to soda. Looks very similar. Sure there's some tiny
bubbles accumulating at top of beverage but besides that I'm None The Wiser
that it's anything different. Anyway looking forward to a nice
physically cleansing experience after this act. Morally cleansing,
too! I plan on sucking on some soap. I haven't cursed lately
that I can remember but this is allowance for future curses. Getting
the punishment out of the way first so I can have fun with the future cause
of punishment ahead of me. Yeah. I feel like I don't
punish myself too much. I take a pretty laissez faire attitude to my
own discipline. And it's gotten my THIS FAR.
How far. This far. Ok I hear ya.
My Dad got some low calorie ice cream sandwiches and the box was only
SLIGHTLY ripped open! How lucky can ya get! Also these
low calorie ice cream sandwiches are still 50% more calories than I want
from an ice cream sandwich. FOR NOW. Once I'm sustaining diet I
can go nuts with these ice cream sandwiches. I'll be none the
wiser. Why do I always wanna be None The Wiser to things.
Keep myself blissfully ignorant. Oh okay that sounds fair. I
dunno if I'm blissfully ignorant In Life. Maybe Contentedly Ignorant.
Which isn't bad either! What else is going on. Looks like the
Yankees will make the playoffs. That's not good news for me! I
don't like them! Hardly seems fair that good things would happen for
them. Oh well that's 2021 MLB Season Playoffs for ya.
Maybe I can send them tainted ice cream sandwiches. What would that
accomplish. Might make them sick. Oh okay gotcha.
Anyway. At this point it's gotta be close to
two weeks where you don't know my lunches. OR my dinners. But
you probably didn't care much about my dinners. Lunches though you
were glued to the screen re: paying attention to... my lunches...
explicitly. What else is going on. Ice cream sandwiches huh.
I like the sound of that. Then again the low calorie ice cream
sandwiches usually skimp with the Sandwich part of the equation.
Inside tastes more or less like ice cream. But the CRUST is mediocre!
Usually some sort of mediocre cold chocolate I Don't Wanna Say WAFER but I
don't know what I Do Wanna Say. Something Else. Not really
CRUST which is a word I used early erroneously. The point is you
get the idea and that's all we can really ask for. That's what writing
and reading is all about. Ideas! Who cares how we get there is
the point I've done my job now get off my back about it.
Anyway. STILL haven't gotten Big Box of paper
towels. I feel terrible about it HOWEVER I feel great that I still
have it coming up. I can't wait and the point is I could have already
had it over and done with and instead I have something t look forward to!
Why were the last three sentences important to say. If anything they
were important NOT to say. Oh well too late to go back now.
Hmm I wonder what city this is in Patriotism Calendar. I think it's a
REAL place and not just an artist's imagination. Small sky scrapers.
Some sort of city park with a monument that resembles a big Metal Bean.
There appears to be a GIANT American Flag only half pixilated waving in the
background covering the entire sky line behind the buildings. Nope
none of those details ring a bell for me.
That's life I guess! Also there's skywriting
Thine alabaster cities gleam but that tells us NOTHING. That
doesn't help! You can have sky writing anywhere. Except
for cities where sky writing is banned. Which has gotta be most
cities. Hmm. What else is going on. I saw a really
fast moving cloud yesterday. Was in the car on the way to Endocrine
Appointment. Cloud was just ZOOMING by in the sky. Yep.
That's the stories I tell here. I SAW A CLOUD. I have no
regrets. It was an interesting cloud! Just a regular big cloud
BREEZIN across the horizon. From left to right! Wow Left To
Right? NOW I've got my attention. What else is going on.
Is global warming responsible for Faster Clouds? My guess?
Sure why not I wouldn't put it past global warming to accelerate the speed
of our clouds. Anyway hey the Act is over. I'll be back in a
You're Doing The Right Thing
Hey! Time to write five more paragraphs which will cover me for the
rest of the day. Time to write last paragraph of the day without
coffee. Unless I finish coffee before finishing last four paragraphs.
Which is extremely possible! Figure I'll save The Sopranos Movie for
mid afternoon. Why leave it for the evening when I can leave it for
the mid afternoon? Why not watch it when I have the time as early
as possible. Because that's not how I operate you idiot. I
never had the game Operation as a child. Not sure why. I guess
my parents are Anti-operations. OPERATION? What's that some sort
of word related to the word and concept OPERA? My guess?
Sure they're related somehow In Latin I wouldn't put it past Latin to
have that sort of arrangement going on. Cool. Not sure if
I've ever seen an opera. I don't think so. Neither in person or
on VHS. Hmm good stuff.
Yeah! Got coffee going just like I said.
Also left over 25% of Last Coffee. So I just added onto that! I
could have poured it out and Started Anew. Would have spent no more
extra coffee that way because I make too much to begin with. Decided
to keep what I had in the cup anyway! Go figure! What else is
going on and crap. It's possible opera is the worst genre not only of
music but of anything. It's not likely. But in this topsy
turvy world just about anything is possible! Hmm what does Turvy
mean. I barely know what Topsy means, don't even get me
started on Turvy. Also I don't barely know what topsy means.
The, "Top," part threw me for a loop. I know what, "Top," means as a
word but I'm not 100% convinced that's related to the definition of,
"Topsy." And, "Turvy," is just nonsense syllables.
Cool! Last paragraph Three of the day!
Huh. What else is going on. Looking forward to a nice huge
break between next walk and next walk after that. Almost a THE
SOPRANOS MOVIE sized break??? I dunno that's an hour or two too
early than I was anticipating. I dunno if I'm comfortable making that
change. Gonna go with what my gut tells me at the moment when the time
comes to make that decision. Anyway. This is The Sopranos but I
just figured out why I'm not 100% enthusiastic about it-- NONE OF THE SAME
CHARACTERS PLAYED BY THE SAME ACTORS. I got A KICK out of the cast of
the TV show and that's all gone now for this movie. Hmm maybe I'll
get a kick out of the cast of the movie. We can't take that
risk!!! What risk. The risk of watching a film and
risking not enjoying the characters as much as when they were played by
other actors. Oh THAT risk.
Penultimate paragraph! I could easily take a
bonus walk today. I will even easilerly NOT do it though. Yep
that all checks out pretty well. At this point I'm taking three
bonus walks every day than the original plan was when I first started this
Era Of Walking. Isn't that enough? Yes. Trick question!
It is enough. How does that make it a trick question. It
was a trick question because it was a trick for you to know the right
answer. Oh okay I see. YEAH. What else is going
on. I'm halfway through THE RING II. I can finish watching that
no harm no foul. I must have seen it before but I don't remember it at
all so that calls into question whether I've seen it before. Maybe
it's just not memorable at all. Nope that can't be it. I
watched half of it last night and I still remember it this morning!
Now you look like a fool for thinking it wasn't memorable at all. You
should apologize to The Ring Franchise.
Last paragraph of the day! The New VHS Spooky
Tape in The Ring II isn't scary at all! Let's talk about it! The
first one in the first film was spooky, no doubt about that! This new
one is TERRIBLE. If you don't believe me then watch it yourself.
Go ahead-- watch it right now! I'll wait for you. ... ...
...FINE THIS WAS ALL JUST A CLEVER RUSE TO GET YOU TO WATCH IT SO THE RING
GIRL WILL KILL YOU INSTEAD OF ME. Are you happy now?
Guess I'm doomed. Can't even convince a single person to watch a
The Ring video so the curse transfers from me to them. What good am I
to anyone! Well I dunno about Anyone but I'm definitely no good to
Myself. Yep that checks out. Anyway the point is I forget
but the entry is just about over so I guess that's the point.
That actually checks out more or less. I'll be back tomorrow!