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Friday, October 22, 2021

I Think You're An Idiot

    Hello friends.  Friday entry!  That means that I may have to accept a super market delivery some time during Act I.  FUN.  Then I get to put stuff on oak tag on floor.  I get to put stuff from oak tag into freezer and fridge.  THEN RECALIBRATE FOR LATER.  Hey why is it called Oak Tag this is neither Oak nor Tag.  Maybe Tag.  I don't know what Tag means in this context.  But this is definitely NOT of an Oak Tree.  Oak Trees are brown or something.  This is white!  You can't fool me with the obvious lie!  Hmm what color are trees.  I feel like this should be obvious but now I'm in my head about it.  I'm definitely leaning towards brown.  Better LTURQ.  GREEN?  THAT CAN'T BE RIGHT.  Green DID occur to me but I was like nah I'm thinking of LEAVES.  Leaves are green.  Trees can't be green.  Then we wouldn't even notice the leaves.  Anyway I lost track of why I was talking about that.
     As soon as I forget Why I was talking about something, time to move on!  Hmm sounds like I'd be in Constant Motion then.  On account of there never being a Why.  Hmm.  Looks like Alec Baldwin killed someone.  It was bound to happen one day!  Anyway I wish him the best of luck in getting over accidental manslaughter.  Gotta imagine he's slightly miffed about the whole deal.  Unless he did it on purpose!  In which case well done congratulations on getting what you want out of life.  How come my first thought was poor Alec Baldwin having to get over this ordeal and not uhhh shouldn't be be investigated for killing someone even if it was an accident.  Movie stars don't go on trial!  It'd be a waste of time!  Jury has their mind made up about movie stars already!  FOR BETTER OR WORSE.  LOOK I have heard the phrase accidental manslaughter and it must have been in a Legal Law sense so Yes This Crime Does Exist.  ALRIGHT. 
     Then again the person who died was the Director of Photography?  And the other guy who got shot is the Super Overall Director?   Maybe this one of their faults?  Also is it weird that I assumed it was another actor he shot and it turned out to be the crew?  How do you accidentally shoot the director?  Why was he aiming guns and shooting them in the first place?  These are questions I assume we'll get some half assed LYING answers to and I look forward to having my interest assuaged.  What else is going on.  Look I'm more or less an Alec Baldwin fan but murdering people is WHERE I DRAW THE LINE.  Not on board!  Also let's be honest I was barely an Alec Baldwin fan to begin with.  Factoring everything I know and have seen about Alec Baldwin he was BARELY in positive territory.  Just above negative territory and Absolute Neutral Territory.  It's my dream one day that all people will be considered equal in Absolute Neutral Territory.  But we'll never get there as long as we keep shooting people! 
     Whatever.  Penultimate paragraph before Coffee!  Don't have soda or vitamin water for this morning.  Having a spare water bottle!  Every now and then you get free water bottles from delivery places.  Not 100% why.  I'll take it, though!  Gotta look up a picture of Alec Baldwin's daughter.  And see if his concerned fathering re: Her weight worked or not.  Better LTURQ.  Alec Baldwin has 3 daughters.  Google WHICH DAUGHTER DID ALEC BALDWIN INSULT.  Hmm looks like it was Ireland Baldwin.  Now to check what her general weight looks like.  Looks healthy to me!  Good for her.  Good for HIM.  Now we know with the benefit of Time Passed that he was Absolutely Right in whatever parenting he did re: The Important Issue of Her weight.  Worked out for the best!  Also her name is Ireland.  Not sure how I feel about that!  If anything I think Alec Baldwin should have mocked her for her name so that by now she'd new a new name.  A better name!  Wonderful.
     Fifth paragraph.  Wonderful.  Also Alec Baldwin ain't exactly the thinnest man in the world.  I'm assuming Thin Man: The Monster is.  That's where he got his name from.  How are those girls doing who killed their friend because of Thin Man: The Monster.  Also are they still scared of Thin Man?  I'd like an update!  I think I'm DUE an update.  I've waited more than long enough!  Anyway.  I think part of the premise of thin man is like he's always watching you just beyond your peripheral vision but he's always there.  No peripheral vision in a jail cell!  Surrounded by walls in a small small room.  You'd definitely see him if he was there.  So you gotta look at the bright side.  As long as you're in prison you're safe!  YEAH.  They might have common rooms in the day time, I dunno!  In which case Yes Thin Man Might Be Watching Them There.
   It's a good thing Alec Baldwin had a Comedy Central Roast a few years ago.  Per my memory.  Cause man oh man this is great fodder.  Hey Remember The Tine you KILLED SOMEONE?!?!  What were you thinking??!!  That sort of thing.  Hmm I'd eat some roast Poultry or Beef.  Or some other kind of meat.  Sounds delicious.  Anyway.  How many people in the world have killed someone.  1%?  More?  Gotta be more.  This includes WAR.  War happens all the time.  It's happening right now!  That's my guess.  I dunno.  I'm sure there'll be a thorough investigation into why Alec Baldwin Went Crazy And Tried To Kill Everyone.  Does he feel his daughter isn't thin enough?  She looked healthy to me!  Either way I anticipate following this story Detail By Detail as it comes out to Us The General Public.
    One day I'd like to be a member of The Specific Public.  Or The Deputy Lieutenant Public.  Or the... c'mon there's half a dozen other definitions of general.  And thus half a dozen other antonyms.  I'd look this up on google but eh oh well what are ya gonna do.  What else is going on.  I imagine it's gonna be hard for Alec Baldwin to find work after this.  Nobody wants to risk getting killed!  That's the OPPOSITE of what people want.  Most of the time at least.  I was watching a scene from Beetlejuice a day or two ago and I was like I know Alec Baldwin and THAT IS NO ALEC BALDWIN.  He doesn't look like Alec Baldwin yet in 1989.  Doesn't sound like him enough, either!  Now to check if I am a Release Date Genius Again and if it was made in 1989... NINETEEN EIGHTY EIGHT?!?!  Well this is terrible news.  Alright back up thing to redeem myself-- DID I SPELL BEETLEJUICE CORRECTLY.  Yes, Yes I Did!  AND YOU ALL DOUBTED ME.
I think Robin Williams character cleverly named his alter ego Mrs. Doubtfire because it gets into her client's head I DOUBT You'd Ever Want To FIRE Me.  So that way she continues working indefinitely even if she does a mediocre job.  It's clever subliminal messaging from Robin Williams Character!  Hmm.  Eighth paragraph.  I've seen Beetlejuice several times and I'm still Not Sure Exactly What Beetlejuice Is.  When I was a kid there was an animated kids show based on Beetlejuice.  Where he's an unambiguous Good Guy whose friends with Lydia.  And they get into adventures or whatever.  And that didn't confuse me.  In the movie now though as an adult I DON'T GET IT.  His personality traits, what he's supposed to do or be, where he comes from, his state of being alive or dead.  I guess I'll have to revisit it another 20 times and by the end of that I'd presumably FINALLY be like ...Oh I guess that is Significantly Enough Alec Baldwin.  I don't have a problem with this being Alec Baldwin anymore.
Penultimate paragraph.  I assume there's someone somewhere right now combing through Alec Baldwin's past to see if there's been any previous suspicious deaths.  Gotta be SOMEONE'S job somewhere, right?  I guess now Alec Baldwin will meet Beetlejuice Again IN HELL.  Not sure what that means exactly.  Alec Baldwin is Going To Hell Now, that's one thing it means.  Beetlejuice exists in Hell somehow, that's another thing it seems to imply.  Whatever what else is going on.  Gotta imagine Alec Baldwin will donate 10,000 dollars to the victims of, "Accidental," Gun Violence to smooth this one over.  That should do the trick!  Also the Quotation Emphasis is HIS.  Not mine!  Hmm seems like an odd way for him to put it.  Oh well who am I to argue.  Some guy.  Oh that checks out.  Anyway.  Alec Baldwin is getting up there in years.  Maybe killing someone and a half was on his bucket list.  Shot two people.  One died.  One recovered.  Gotta imagine in his mind this counts as One And A Half Killings.  Maybe.  Depends on how seriously injured this Other Guy Was/Is!
Last paragraph of the act is the point.  The point is even the guy who survived presumably Got The Message.  Ugh.  The point is I'm not sure if they're gonna continue production of this movie at all!  They'd need to start all over with a brand new Director Of Photography.  Unless the old one had a twin.  In which case they're the same person??  Huh.  What to watch between Entry and Accepting Super Market Delivery.  Well this is a no brainer continue watching Tales From That Crypt.  Sounds good enough to me!  I feel like Beetlejuice and The Crypt Keeper would really get along with each other.  They seem like natural best friends.  This isn't a joke.  It's something I feel strongly.  I wanna set them up and see for myself how great they hit it off.  Huh.  I GET The Crypt Keeper though.  Much more than I get Beetlejuice.  Hmm.  Anyway I'll be back a little bit later! 




You Know Who You Are

    Hey!  Accepted Super Market Delivery.  So far my favorite part by far is the individual portions of Snapple which are relatively large.  We're talkin' a 12 pack of 16 oz Diet Lemon Snapple!  The only way this could be better is if it was a FOURTEEN PACK.  The way it stands I can have two a day for the entire week!  Except for one day!  Which I have none!  But that's the price of doing business!  Well we settled all the important life updates now we can move on with my life.  Also it's no longer in glasses.  Now its in plastics!  Probably better for the environment.  Wait no that might be inaccurate.  Probably more cost effective for Snapple.  Yeah!  Maybe they pass some of those savings onto US!!!  Anything's possible!  Suffice to say No Snap Sound when opening the plastic bottle.  There goes that.  Okay so NOW we settled all the important business.  I thought we had it settled halfway into the paragraph but it turns out there was more.
    Think I just may watch DUNE tonight.  Kind of concerned I won't be able to follow what's going on!  Seems too complicated.  Wait.  There's MULTIPLE PLANETS?  And MORE THAN ONE CHARACTER?  And possibly TWO OR THREE THEMES?  Too much for me!  Count me out!  Except I'll give it a shot anyway.  Count me in!  I've never been a big Science Fiction fan.  WELL IS IT SCIENCE OR IS IT FICTION.  These two concepts aren't complete opposites but they're pretty close!  That sort of thing.  Also from what I can tell, Dune is Fiction.  Most Science Fiction is actually Fiction.  Off the top of my head that sounds accurate.  If it was more Science than Fiction they'd just call it Science!  The point is what else is going on.  Looking forward to taking a bath.  It'll be a solid 24 hours since looking at my belly Last Time I Took A Bath.  I've lost roughly a fifth of a pound since then per my estimations.  That'll show up somehow maybe a little bit possibly!  YEAH! 
     I think in Dune they harvest Spice?  That's the synthetic Marijuana Bath Salt, right?  Wonder why in the future that's by far the most valuable resource in the universe.  I guess it must be a little bit more perfected than Current Marijuana Bath Salts.  Because as of now they're pretty dangerous!  I guess in a million years they tweak the formula a bit to make it safer.  Hmm makes sense.  Look despite spending 10 paragraphs besmirching Alec Baldwin, solid 80 percent chance this was a mistake.  And within that 80%, solid Another 80% chance that it wasn't even his fault.  It could be a mistake and him be ultimately responsible for the goof-em-up.  Or it could be a mistake and we can blame it on some other idiot.  I guess we'll find out!  The point is I wonder if Alec Baldwin will give up his co-conspirators in an attempt to reduce his own prison time and get a better sentence.  My guess?  I dunno I don't know Alec Baldwin that well.  I don't know him at all.  Only what I've Seen On The T.V.
Penultimate paragraph of the act.  I don't believe it!  I already finished my first bottle of snapple.  How terrible!  Luckily I got bonus soda.  I should be okay overall beveragewise.  It's just a matter of strategically drinking the snapple so I get the most out of it instead of blowing it all within a period of half a day.  Huh.  If you think I'm gonna spend 2.5 hours watching Dune then YOU'RE The Science Fiction!  Yeah.  What a Slam.  I slammed you good!  Well it's half a slam on you and half a slam on Dune.  And half a slam on My Ability To Watch Dune.  The point is there's a lot of slamming going around with this thing I said and no one is coming out unscathed!  Huh.  The point is I never thought I'd like Lord Of The Rings but 20 years after the movie came out I actually did end up liking it!  So at this rate I'll like Dune by the time Dune is actually takes place!  Great!  Huh.
     Last paragraph before Cleansing exercise. The point is if Star Wars took place a long time ago and Dune takes place a long time in the future man oh man are they taking place a long time apart from each other.  Wonderful.  Great content you're getting here on this website!  Definitely worth reading.  Hmm.  Gonna take a bath.  Kinda wonder if bath salts are any good re: Their Presumable Actual Purpose.  What do they do?  Make it smell nice?  Make the bath Carbonated?  Not 100% sure what bath salts are.  Solid chance that bath salts don't even pretend to have a real non-drug use.  I'd look into it but I don't care enough.  So you could see the kind of predicament I'm in.  Huh.  Hmm we're deep enough into the entry when we can start considering how much of this have I said before.  Off the top of my head let's go with the easy estimation and say 50%.  Also there's no going under the top of my head.  This is my off-the-cuff estimation and that's all we're getting for now!  Be back soon.




Now It's Later Than It Was Before

    Hey!  Time to write five more paragraphs.  Crunched the numbers and I'm gonna cut diet in half at the end of the month!  Or more accurately the beginning of the next month.  I will start new diet parameters 12:00 AM November 1st.  WOW I GET TO DO STUFF LIKE EAT MORE.  Life may not be great but at least we get to eat shit every now and then.  So I got that going for me!  Gonna have coffee after this paragraph.  Got THAT going for me.  Hmm what's a third thing I have going for me.  Looking forward to being able to buy marijuana legally and easily!  I think I'll get a kick out of that.  May bother me and I hate it!  May love it!  Only one way to find out.  WAIT.  Then try it.  Then see what happens!  Also the combination of Eating shit AND smoking marijuana?  WOW now we're talking really solid way to let life pass by until you're ready to die.
  Variety Is the Spice Of Life.  Is that relevant to Dune.  My guess is yes vaguely.  In the meantime though let's write four paragraphs and then have a great Rest Of The Day.  I assume I will Not Watch Dune.  I think that would make my Day Worse!  Look might I get something out of watching Dune.  Maybe!  But ON AVERAGE I would get MORE out of some other thing in the 50th percentile of Things To Do.  Other than Dune.  So my best option is take a chance and do something else instead!  Amazing.  Is there footage of Alec Baldwin shooting his victims.  They were on a film set!  Probably lots of cameras around.  Perhaps there were people shooting a MAKING OF The Film.  Gotta imagine that's a decent chance there's A Brand New Snuff Film Out There!  I envy people who are into snuff films.  They have something great to look forward to!  No judgment.  What else is going on.  Wait a second YES Judgment.  Don't be into snuff films!  That will only encourage More Snuff Films!  Also it's just weird and scary!  Hmm I've given us all a lot to think about.
      Third paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  LOOK is there a niche market for Snuff Snuff Films?  A film showing the filming of a snuff film?  Because that may be in the cards!  Like I said they could have been shooting a Making Of for the DVD release of Whatever This Movie Alec Baldwin Was Making Is.  Hmm a lot of the logic of this doesn't check out.  But that's to be expected when you read this website.  So we got that going for us.  Anyway.  Gonna take a 30-45 minute long break between Entry and Upcoming Future Walk.  I can live with that!  Why shouldn't I be able to live with that.  It's relatively positive for me!  I get to do whatever dumb stuff I want that's the same as yesterday.  I remember yesterday.  I solidly remember some of it being vaguely neutral!  Can't argue with that!
     Cool.  Gonna shave this weekend.  Two weeks since last time!  Time to grow up and shave myself Basically Often Enough.  How often do I have to cut my hair to be Basically Grown Up Often Enough.  My guess is every 3 months is pushing it.  Maybe every 2 months.  Amazing.  What if I wore a hat all the time.  Then no one would be the wiser.  I'D know.  And that's what matters.  I guess.  HMM I gotta have a nice Mets Cap somewhere.  I remember having it in the past!  Maybe I could start wearing that for style.  And for comfort!  And apparently to disguise my uncut hair.  Doesn't really DISGUISE the hair.  It covers it up.  It doesn't make the hair look like other hair.  That's what disguising would be!  The point is Hmm wonder where that hat is.  Also I think people would respect me more if I wore a Mets hat around town.  Go figure.
Last paragraph of the day!  Amazing.  GREAT JUST GREAT.  The next Tales From That Crypt episode I have chronologically is the last one I watched before starting at Season 1 Episode 1 All Over Again.  Now I gotta watch it AGAIN.  That hardly seems fair.  But I don't make the rules!  No one does.  There are no rules!  Better make some arbitrary rules for myself so I have some semblance of structure.  First rule is gotta watch next episode chronologically even if I already watched it recently.  Okay.  Wonderful.  Settled that!  What else is going on.  Does Earth exist as part of the story in Dune.  I'd like at least One Planet I Can Relate To.  That's my hot take on Dune.  That and whatever I said before.  Off the top of my head it was mostly making several puns with the term spice.  Amazing.  Hey that's it for today!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:12 P.M.





Thursday, October 21, 2021

I Insist This Be Okay

    Hey friends!  Went to get blood work done.  I accepted them taking blood work.  I accepted them taking my blood pressure!  Many Times!  They took blood pressure sitting and standing.  Way too low!  Drink some water.  They did 'em both again!  Way too low!  Drank some water.  They did 'em both again!  Too Low but We'll Settle!  Wonderful.  I'd rather have low pressure high blood pressure.  Hmm. Not sure about that.  Well I'd rather have low blood pressure sitting down and high blood pressure standing up.  They even themselves out!  As long as I'm Crouching All The Time.  Which I would want to be anyway!  So I'm really coming out on top in this scenario that I made up.  Anyway all that delayed my day about an hour.  Hours are nothing!  I laugh at the prospect of an hour messing my day up.  Ha-Ha!  That sort of thing.  I have too many good options for dinner and I've already suggested them too much.  I suggested to my Dad we get Deli.  I suggested to my Mom we make Frenched  Toast.  And to myself I'll admit I have 1 or 2 other options I'd probably prefer over these two!  I'm gonna look like a jerk to One if not BOTH of my parents re: How Dinner Ends Up.  Why couldn't I just keep my big mouth shut!
     Oh well.  That's not Dinner Talk.  That's Getting Ahead Of Myself Talk.  Why must I commit myself to things before I'm ready.  Makes me feel like a big man.  Big man with a plan.  Also can't just keep it to myself.  I need everyone around me to know I'm A Big Man With A Plan.  Also explicitly saying my plan makes me wanna Not Do It even more.  That's life I guess.  Watched episode 2 of Chucky: The Television Programme.  Okay!  I still enjoy it happening!  I saw a clip of Brad Duorif, the voice of Chucky, after the show.  They were discussing the making of the show or something.  TOO OLD.  I'd like to see Brad Dourif 10, 15 years younger.  That's my one note.  Dourif.  Do Ur RIFF?  I was gonna do that anyway, Brad!  Once I come up with a riff at least.  Then I'll do it like nobody's business.  Kind of like its other peoples' businesses.  That's how they relate!  C'mon.
     Third paragraph.  I like the every-now-and-then parts of TV Show where it hits Nostalgia Childhood buttons.  Hey THIS MUSIC reminds me of the music they played in Childhood III.  By which I mean Child's Play III.  I dunno why I wrote Childhood III.  Fruedish Slip or something.  Either way HEY I WAS A KID WHEN THAT HAPPENED IN THE FIRST PLACE.  So I got that going for me.  It's fun to remember being a kid!  Being a kid was All Good Times 100%!  When watching TV at least.  And that's EXACTLY what I was doing when watching Childplay III.  What else is going on.  Any sort of stadium or arena where you could have Crowd Audience Seats directly above the field.  Probably would need a Roofed arena.  But why not hang some seats from the very top.  Pop up could hit them.  That's why there's a NET you idiot.
     Also I feel like if you hit a pop up Past The Ceiling Net that's a home run?  You hit it out of the park Vertically.  Well done, circle them bases, you did the best thing you can do as a Baseball.  Any thought on Underground Baseball?  Where there's holes and hidden passageways underground.  Either for ball to be hit and fielded or maybe for runners to run.  My guess?  I hope not.  Anyone who thought that has got lots of problems going for them.  There's a headline on Official Mets Page/Blog about Billy Beane not making it personal that he turned down becoming Mets GM.  It's a FRONT PAGE HEADLINE.  I did it for me personal reasons Not Because Mets Are Jerks!  This is a huge scoop that One Person Says He's Doesn't Totally Despise Or Hold Grudges Against Mets Leadership.  I thought it was vaguely amusing.  Now I roped you into this situation.  Sorry!
     Coffee after this paragraph is done!  Wonderful.  Besides committing myself to meals I don't want, what else do I have in store for the day.  Hmm.  Building up the COURAGE to have meals I haven't committed to.  Just bite the bullet and be like ya know what, Mom, Dad?  Gonna have something else.  Dunno what yet!  And maybe just maybe it'll be what we discussed.  But probably not.  Suffice to say this isn't because I despise or hold grudges against you.  It's just for me personal reasons.  Something along those lines.  I feel like I 10% despise my parents and 35% hold grudges against them.  NOT BAD.  I feel like those numbers are pretty respectable for how well families can relate to each other.  I have twin daughters entering Catholic High School in Oakland this year!  I can't suddenly mix things up and be having Bens Deli For Dinner!  Wonderful.
     I assume Catholic people go out of their way to not eat Kosher food.  I also would have assumed people who live in Oakland would go out of their way to not live in Oakland, though!  So I guess Billy Beane is the exception that proves the rule.  Finally we found an exception to the rule!  ONCE AND FOR ALL IT'S BEEN PROVED.  I have no idea what that phrase is supposed to mean and I really have no idea how it started because presumably it started based on some sort of weird scientific logic.  SOMEONE came up with it and I'm gonna get to the bottom of this perhaps the next time I think about it.  Probably not though.  Probably never!  Hey that's life.  I got coffee going on.  I'm guessing over 50% of Christians think Jews go out of their way to hate Jesus.  I don't mean 2000 years ago.  I mean now.  Billy Beane (classic example of a Catholic) thinks I'm just sitting around stewing THAT DAMN CHRIST I HATE HIM SO MUCH.  And he's Hardly Even A TENTH Right!
     What else is going on.  Seventh paragraph!  Wonderful.  Gotta have some good stuff in store for the day.  Hmm.  I can think of a lot of not TERRIBLE stuff.  That's kind of good?  Could be worse!  That's my new motto of life lately.  It's from that part in Jurassic Park where John Hammond and the Jurassic Park Team are lamenting the Snooze of a Tour that the main characters got at Jurassic Park.  None of the dinosaurs showed up and it rained and they to cut it short.  And Samuel L Jackson is like it could have been worse.  it could have been A Lot worse.  That's how I feel about life this week!  What else is going on.  Also spoiler alert IT GETS A LOT WORSE.  In the movie and I guess most likely in life!  We'll just have to wait and see.  Then again it also gets a lot better!  Look, a third of the main characters die on the way to the end, but those remaining sure had a weekend they'll never forget!!!  Unless if it takes place during the week.  Then I Don't Know What To Say.
Eighth paragraph!  Wonderful.  This may or may not be universal but I'm Okay With Low Blood Pressure.  Everyone knows high blood pressure is common and a bad thing.  So I see I got low blood pressure?  My first Thought-Instinct is this is Great I'm Way Ahead Of The Game!  I'm not proud of it.  I'm a little proud of it!  What else is going on.  Another :08 Baseball game today.  8:08.  At least That's A Thing.  Like a Drum Machine or something.  I don't have all the details.  Also you remove the colon.  Otherwise the drum machine won't function properly.  Huh.  I feel like you get a point for every time you eat something Kosher and you lose three points every time you don't.  If you die with a positive number you go to Heaven.  Also that's the ONLY criteria.  Also I think in Judaism there's no Hell?  But there's still gotta be SOME reward for Life Well Lived.  Heaven Heaven and Hell Heaven.  Hmm maybe I'd rather go to Hell Heaven.  No.  That can't be right! 
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it.  The point is if you want to eat a lot of Non-Kosher Foods your main way to game the system is over eat a lot.  Eat A LOT of Kosher Foods even if you're not hungry to make up for the Lots of Non-Kosher Foods you like to eat.  Wonderful.  At what point is Kosh a slang among teenager girls for cool.  At this point?  In the early 2000's?  I guess we'll never know for sure.  Why does it have to be among teenager girls.  And why does it have to be slang for Cool.  I DON'T KNOW.  What you think I have the answers?  I Have No Answers!  What else is going on.  Also for the people who die in Jurassic Park, at least they died doing what they loved.  Getting eaten by dinosaurs.  Huh.  Not enough people dying from being Stomped On by a giant herbivore.  Possibly NEVER in the 5 Jurassic Park/World Films.  I feel like we're owed at least ONE Death By Unintentional Stomping.  Also those are my porn search parameters.  Unintentional Stomping.  Prove me wrong!
     Last paragraph of the act!  I'm GUESSING stomping is stomping on testicles and/or penis.  And I'm ASSUMING unintentional means unintentional.  Hmm.  You can stomp on People In General.  Gonna have to look into this one.  Or not.  I'm definitely leaning towards the Or Not for now!  Then again who knows what the future holds.  What else is going on.  Maybe there's intentional stomping going on amongst big herbivores.  They get nothing tangible out of killing humans but maybe they're just jerks!  Anyway.  They checked my weight At Blood Work and I again told them not to tell me.  I also won't want them to tell me in Mid November.  PROBABLY not in Mid December.  Once we're in Mid January I will almost definitely be done dieting based on both My Calculations Of My Weight and My Being Okay With What I Look At In Mirror.  So basically anything they say can't hurt me!!  Maybe a little bit of a sting!  But not too bad!  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit. 





It's Good To Have Standards

    I may have written a lot of this before.  I may have written a lot of this Not before!  This is the price you pay when you write So Much Nonsense Every Day.  Got a delivery earlier before my walk meant for a different address.  Since I was taking walk anyway I went to bring it to them.  SAW THE UPS GUY IN THE PROCESS.  Confronted him!  He was embarrassed BUT NOT ENOUGH.  Also he doubled back in the direction of my house and I was like nope these two are both packages you left me here ya go.  Then he was like YEAH BUT WHAT ABOUT THE OTHER MISTAKES I'VE MADE.  Wonderful.  Maybe I got scammed by a fake UPS uniform and a fake UPS Truck.  That's the price we pay when we're too lazy to demand proper authentication!  Anyway what else is going on.  Am I supposed to watch Dune today.  I don't know.  I don't have a high opinion of Dune.  Takes place in Desert!  I wouldn't wanna be in a desert in real life, why should I want to be in it through the power of Entertainment.
     Huh.  I'd be in some deserts I guess for limited amounts of time.  But that's where I draw the line!  What line.  The Limited Amounts Of Time Line.  Hmm.  It's called desert because if you're deserted in the desert that's the worst place you can be deserted.  Off the top of my head.  Whatever.  OH I know what I can do today.  I came up with it last night!  Go through all the Tales From The Crypts again in chronological order!  SO FAR I'm 2.25 EPISODES IN.  This is going to be fun.  Because it's EASY and SAFE and COMFORTABLE.  I know what I'm getting and I'm getting exactly what I wanna be getting!  Is there episode which take place in desert?  YES off the top of my head two.  Hmm.  One episode partly takes place in Las Vegas and an area presumably within a hundred or two hundred miles of Las Vegas.  Does that count?  My guess?  No.  What else is going on.  Hmm I've only been thinking of The Wild Wild West desert.  Maybe there's episodes in other deserts.  NOPE I DON'T THINK SO.  Well I'm glad we settled this once and for all.  Important Subject Down!  Now we can move on to the next important subject.  How many episodes of Tales From The Crypt in The Tundra.
What else is going on.  I really bought this guy was a UPS delivery guy.  Hook line and sinker.  I guess I'm some sort of gullible fool oh well what can ya do.  I'd rather Trust Everyone and be wrong 50% of the time than Trust No One and be wrong... 50% of the time again?  That's how that math would work I think.  The same amount of people out there are trustworthy whether I trust them or not, assuming I'm dealing with the exact same people.  Which may not be the case.  I might choose to deal with a different set of people depending on how trustworthy I am.  Huh.
  Either way I TRUST THIS ONE GUY.  Not to deliver packages properly.  He's shown me he's TERRIBLE at that.  But I trust him to actually work for UPS.  And not be disgruntled.  And he's making mistakes by accident rather than through some grand evil design.  Then again I hadn't really thought about that until just now.  Maybe it's part of a grand evil design.  Gonna have to look into that one.
Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Honestly when I was getting back from my walk after interacting with him at start of walk I was 5% worried the packages would be back in front of my door.  And of that 5%, 80% worried that it was a bomb and meant to blow up my house, and 20% worried man this guy just never learns!  What else is going on.  Also it was 2 packages.  Two envelope packages.  Maybe I've been  unclear these paragraphs.  One delivery from one delivery person but it was two separate envelopes.  TOO LATE FOR ME TO CLEAR THINGS UP NOW.  YOU'VE BEEN CONFUSED FOR THE LAST TWO HOURS.  It takes you two hours to read three and a half paragraphs?  MY three and a half paragraphs YEAH.  Wonderful!  Man oh man I'm helping you and/or me kill a lot of time.  Good for me!  And/or you!  What else is going on.  Now that I think about it I'm kind of okay with the plans I've made re: committing to upcoming meals.  So in the end everything works out in life.
Gonna have to look into that one.  In the mean time let's finish this act.  I feel like there's a standard high school test called The Act and I never took it.  Some sort of off brand SAT test.  Who needs it.  We got the SAT.  Be happy with that!  I got THINGS to do I can't take an Acting Test!  Also I think a good grade on the ACT is like a 23.  I feel like the normal range of grades in ACT is like 18 through 25.  Better LTURQ.  Looks like you can score between a 1 and a 36.  And 20 is standard.  Hmm I was giving these people who get in the low 20's WAY too much credit.  I rescind my acceptance letter for them to my college!  I'll refer them to A Worse College though to save them some time.  I'm not a MONSTER.  I want to help SOMEHOW.  Ugh.  For me though I feel like I'd Like My Act Grade Like I Like My Age-- 32. I'd be okay with a 32!  Ugh.  Hey the act is over.  I'll be back in a little bit!  I'm not sure I Like My Age.  I like referring to my age as 32 because it's accurate.  Kind of would rather be 18, though!  Let's talk about it!  I'll be back in a little bit.





I Made It Through The Day So Far

    Hey!  Took a bath.  Doing okay re: Schedule For Today.  Behind Normal but Ahead Of Being Behind Enough Such That It Is A Problem!  What else do I got going for me.  I don't mean to brag but I watched .75 of a Tales From The Crypts episode and now I am solidly up to episode 4.  I kind of do mean to brag.  It's an important point, other people must know it, and it must make them think more highly of me.  So I got that going for me.  Anyway.  Wonder what my blood pressure would be like right now.  One can only imagine.  Also every time I'm asked in a scenario like this have you drank any water today I gotta make a snap decision well do I just answer whether I've drank water or whether I've drank FLUIDS.  No I don't drink water ever that's disgusting.  I drink a lot of soda, though!  There's water in soda!  If I had to guess it's probably HALF water!  Anyway today I just said no.  Felt easier in the moment.  I've talked about that before.  I'll talk about it again.  It's not my fault if it comes up twice every month.
     It kind of is my fault.
  Sort of 60% my fault.  In the meantime though what else is going on.  Gotta nice today ahead of me I guess!  No special New Episode of TV or Movie.  But the same special Old Episodes of TVs and Movies that were around yesterday are still here.  None of them have been taken away.  So there's that.  Gotta imagine some of them have been taken away.  Across all platforms I'm sure there's a dozen or two TV or Movies disappearing EVERY DAY.  Oh No I'm Scared.  They're replaced with new things though.  Oh No I'm Scared.  Hmm.  Does anything not scare me.  Sure lots of things don't scare me!  They're just all not Film or TV related!  What else is going on.  I got enough beverage to last me the day.  The question is will I have any leftover for Tomorrow Morning 2 or 3 or So hours before new super market delivery.  The answer is probably not.  Wow I introduced a question AND I answered it!  Problem Created and Problem Solved!
     Wonderful.  LOOK if I was drinking anything else I'd tell the nurse.  I'm ashamed to tell them soda.  If it was juice, sure I'd say that.  Vodka.  Fine I'll tell em.  Some sort of black market red bull that's somehow even more unhealthy.  I'd share that.  NOT SODA THOUGH.  MAYBE SELTZER.  THAT'S WHERE I DRAW THE LINE.  I was reading an article about a baseball game a week or two ago and it quotes one of the pitchers who refers to drinking three red bulls before the game.  I don't like that!  A) probably should be illegal to do in a baseball game.  B) I'm worried for HIM that too much.  C) TERRIBLE example for kids.  D) WHERE CAN I GET THESE RED BULLS.  WHY IS THIS GUY DRINKING ALL THE REDBULLS.  Ugh.  Haven't had an energy drink in too long!  It's been far too long!  I don't know WHY I'd want one.  I just feel like I'd get a real kick and a half out of a diet energy drink.  Pitch for Redbull-- Drink with 75% of the energy boost called... Uh... Pink Bull?  Pink is light red.  But those looking for energy don't want a pinkbull!  Maybe they do!  I haven't studied this population subset extensively yet! 
     Penultimate paragraph!  Wonderful.  I think it's great Red Bull saves a lot of money on advertisements by using generic substandard animation.  Very clever! Now they can put all that ancillary money into R & D to develop an energy drink 75% as strong.  Let's face it there's no market in America for a Slightly Less Strong Energy Drink.  If they're developing new drinks they're obviously gonna go in the direction of something 2000% as strong.  That's what America wants and that's what America gets!  Not so much because we love energy so much but because we are stupid and love buying stupid things when encouraged to by interesting advertising campaigns.  Also we like energy too.  Why not.  Better than nothing.  Anyway hey I get to take a walk pretty soon.  Maybe right after the entry!  That's Today for ya!
     Last paragraph of the day.  I hope so.  I can't imagine a scenario where I have to write more paragraphs that is a positive scenario for me.  Only negative ones!  Hmm.  Looks like we're 1/3rd into Fall.  Not bad!  I'd say 1/3rd into Fall is ROUGHLY PERFECT.  Weatherwise!  These days!  Can't tell you what it'd be like Weatherwise in 30 years!  Can't even tell you what it'll be like weatherwise tomorrow let alone in 30 years.  But I REALLY can't tell ya in 30 years.  What else is going on.  I wonder if we'll be done burning fossil fuels in 30 years.  My guess?  At that point we're pretty pot committed to it why stop then-now that's my feeling.  Besides a lot of us will be dead in 30 years.  How DARE we presume to know what's best for future generations.  That's THEIR business not ours.  I dunno something like that.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:39 P.M.





Wednesday, October 20, 2021

One Can Never Have Enough Titles

    I guess.  Hello friends!  Just had a Zoom'd Appointment with Therapist Person.  I had forgotten it was today!  Luckily I was home when Therapist Person called me to tell me I wasn't in the appointment.  The point is that's all settled and I've been Theraputic'd for another four weeksworth.  What else is great.  I had a third of a Freedom Chip Pancake for breakfast, but the great part about that was there was a Chocolate (Freedom) Chip on the table just now that Picked up and ate!  Hmm this tastes Chocolate And Sweet.  I like the Chip Form Too.  Only complaint is it's pretty small.  But if it was any bigger I'd have to consider how many calories it was.  All in all it's an interesting experience that I can't wait to write in my diary about.  This is my diary.  As far as you know!
Wonderful.  As of yesterday I'm starting to go into watching Jurassic Parks as repetition TV or Movies.  Look I've seen it 40 times already in life.  THEN I watched the original trilogy 3 times in the last 3 months and that's a step up.  NOW as of last night its in the category of Tales From The Crypt that I'll just put it on every day of the week for Background Fun.  SO FAR I ONLY REGRET IT A LITTLE.  Also I watched some of it in Spanish and ENTIRELY DIFFERENT MOVIE.  Different pacing to it!  When movies are in Spanish you need some time to understand what they're saying.  I don't have time to figure out what people are talking about.  There's DINOSAURS running around.  Oh No they might be coming to a compromise in Building Back Better Again.  A) Compromise is too Low!  B) They're gonna try to make it even lower C) At this point, This ain't Build Back Better, this is Build Ba at most!  They got rid of the CK Better completely!  NOW LOUIE CK WILL NEVER GET BETTER.  And then where will be as a society.  NO ONE THAT'S WHO.
Anyway.  Zoom appointment didn't screw up my daily schedule too much.  10-15 minutes taken up that I hadn't anticipated.  Not so bad!  What else is going on.  Ancillary soda for today is Orange.  Tomorrow is Sprite.  Then I RE-CALIBRATE.  Not sure Ancillary is the word I want.  It is accurate.  It is a solid 75% of The Word I want.  I mean something more like complimentary.  Or supplemental.  You get the idea.  I hope so.  I've given you three words as clues for that The Idea Is.  And that doesn't even count the rest of the context I gave you!  Anyway.  Wednesday!  Maybe that's why they were playing Adams' Family yesterday.  Ancillary Character named Wednesday.  They wanted to prepare us for today!  I believe I recorded these movies from TV on Saturday of Sunday.  The point is still valid, though.  They still wanted to prepare us for Wednesday: The Day, they just were getting way  ahead of the game and giving us plenty of time to adjust.  YEAH.
What else is going on.  Creeping up to the time that Phone Company insists I get new phone.  Something about I can't HANDLE the new amount of Coverage on my old phone.  Either 5G or 6G.  The current phone I have can't even get on board with that if it tried!  Amazing.  A brand new phone.  Maybe this time with NO watching pornography.  Not sure the logic in that.  I'm sure there's some reasons to not watch pornography on new 11G portable phones but right now I can't think of them.  Oh right That's too many, "G's," for pornography.  You're gonna want a 3G, 4G phone at most for that sort of stuff.  Huh.  I looked up ON THE INTERNET if we're going to 5G or 6G now.  Presumably from the G beforehand.  NOT SURE.  I know in sixth grade I was in class 6G2.  And in seventh and eighth grade I was in 7G2 and 8G2 Respectfully.  Fifth grade was nothing.  That was elementary school.  Also feel like I'm giving too much information away with this.  Someone wanna google 6G2, now they know about me AND my phone watching pornography PAST habits.
  Not sure why my class wasn't G1.  Seems like kind of A Disrespectful to My Class and Me: The Best Us and The Best Me Of The Us.  Also high school you're not in single class.  Each period is a new amalgamation of people.  You know with ANCILLARY players and whatnot.  Get off my back about it.  I bet if someone asked Wednesday, "What's your favorite day of the week?" Wednesday would be like, "Tuesday."  And the home audience (and people in the audience in scene where this is taking place) would laugh and laugh.  Hmm.  Are there eccentric rich people who hire people to just watch them live their lives.  Live!  Just set up a room for a Sitcom-esque viewing audience in your home.  Maybe applause and laugh sign, maybe let them do it as they please!  Gotta imagine SOME weirdoes would be into that.  Good idea for an Actual TV Show though.  It's a sitcom but TURNED ON ITS HEAD.  Let's get TV People working on this one.  You know Ancillary TV People.
Here's some good news for everyone.  Coffeemate Creamer lasted EXACTLY as long as I anticipated it would and has been at the rate I've been estimating I'm consuming it.  Sure I've been pouring only roughly 90% in each cup than I used to because I wanted to make it last this time around but other than that EXACTLY THE SAME.  So 90% the same.  OR 110%  I don't know how math works right now and I've got other things to do like start a new sentence after this one.  Hey that sentence we were talking about-- it's this one!  Amazing.  Got coffee going is the point.  Hey here's some good news REALLY for everyone-- looks pretty possible Javy Baez resigns with The Mets.  I like his moxie!  One thing you're gonna get with Javy Baez and besides his name being Javy Baez is that He's Got Moxie.  Hmm what's the antonym of Moxie.  Off the top of my head Mixie?  Better LTURQ.  Merriam Wesbter has one antonym-- inexperience.  That's way off.  Not even an ancillary antonym in MY book.  Also I'm starting my own book.  Moxie Definition Book.  Still in the early stages.
Seventh paragraph!  I feel like the premise of new Mets Owner this past year and a half is that he's like Don't put it past me that I'll Be Dumb and spend All The Money!  I hope so.  More money means more TALENT.  More talent means TOO MUCH TALENT.  Too much talent means WE GET TO CUT SOME PEOPLE.  Getting to cut some people means NOW THERE'S SURPLUS PEOPLE LOOKING FOR OTHER JOBS.  Huh.  What else is going on.  Do I feel kind of like a jerk for forgetting appointment?  For about 10 seconds sure.  Then I adjusted my mindset and stopped caring because it didn't hold her up much or anything.  Maybe 2 or 3 minutes.  That's nothing!  I've been held up 2 or 3 DECADES.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Got new episode of CHUCKY to look forward to today.  I hope I don't mess things up and watch an episode of the FOX 2009 show CHUCK.  First gotta make sure that's a Fox show.  Then that it's from 2009.  Then that there's a show Chuck at all.  Maybe I should do that in reverse order.  Maybe that's how YOU do things Not Me Though!  CHUCK 2007 through 2012 NBC.  We'll I was 2/3rds there.  Not so bad for Chuck.
     Eighth paragraph.
  I can get Diet Snapple for upcoming week but it's a 12 pack of Regular Travel Sized Glass Bottle Snapple instead of 2 or 3 plastic Larger Sized Bottles.  Probably less cost effective.  Possibly less liquid overall.  DEFINITELY more fun.  I like glass glasses.  I get to break them by accident and then the real fun begins.  Huh.  What else is going on and crap.  I hope I don't have to put on Jurassic Park today or tonight.  That means my Day didn't turn out as great as it should have.  Also my days should turn out great as a standard rule of thumb.  That's my hot take!  What else is going on.  I like the turnover in Major League Baseball Managers and possible Major League Professional Sports Managers in general.  They just routinely get fired before the end of their contract.  My impression is that over 50% of the time they don't make it the entire length!  I'm assuming that means they still have to be paid they just don't get to do their job too!  Good for them.  Anyone wonder if maybe they have incentive to do a shitty job their first season there so that they can have complete total free time the next 2 seasons after being fired?  Hmm sounds like a decent scam.  I gotta get in on that!  Alright first things first I need to make myself an attractive manager option to a Sports Team.  Hmm.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Maybe there's clauses in contracts that they can be fired without pay for extenuating circumstances.  And doing a shitty job is an extenuating circumstance.  What do I know.  Much like ancillary I don't know what, "extenuating," means.  I was closer on ancillary.  Extenuating I was pretty off.  Hey that's part of life.  Not knowing what words mean.  One day I hope to learn what the words do mean but not today.  Ugh.  I think Extenuating circumstances would be the manager being like DON'T BLAME ME for the team sucking I was forced to deal with THESE SHITTY PLAYERS there are extenuating circumstances! The shitty players I gotta put up with!  I think that's more or less accurate.  Great!  Progress.  Hey what else is going on.  I can't start a, "What else is going on," the paragraph is all but over!
  What else is going on.  Also the Chucky show is an hour long!  No half hour!  Also it's probably 42 minutes yes.  But that's WAY more than 22 minutes.  Also it's way more than even THIRTY minutes.  Roughly less than 45 minutes.  More than 10 minutes.  Less than four hours!  I can go on and on.  Don't push me.  I'll do it.  I'll go on and on way past your comfort level.  DON'T MAKE ME DO IT.  Anyway what else is going on.  I wonder what kind of ancillary extenuating circumstances Chucky will get into this week!  Possibly as many as SOME.  Most likely as many as NONE.  I haven't put the pieces together on what an Ancillary Extenuating Circumstance is yet.  That's too advanced for me!  Putting definitions together is way behind my Grade Level.  Hmm what grade would I be in if I advanced a grade a year.  28th grade.  Is that right?  Sounds about right.  The point is I'll be back in a little bit.





That's What Really Counts

    I guess.  Hey time to write some more paragraphs.  Got some Vitamin Water Zeroe going on.  Don't mean to brag, but I skipped another day yesterday of having Vitamin Water Zeroes so I have THREE to last me today and tomorrow.  WOW.  TWO IN ONE DAY.  Or 1.5 both days.  LIKE I SAID TWO IN ONE DAY.  What else is going on in the wide world of sports.  Still going through Old Music I Like primarily.  I'm down to the FINAL TRACK of an album for next walk.  If I know what's good for me I'd pick out the next album NOW.  Or LATER.  But BEFORE THE CUT OFF DATE of actually taking the walk.  Hmm.  How about a CHILL album.  Everyone knows how much I like CHILL.  This occasion is no different!  Then again HOT albums have something going for them too!  Uh oh I'm in WORSE shape trying to decide than I was 3 sentences ago.  The good news is Somehow That Made Up An Entire Half Of A Paragraph.
Wonderful.  Also BIG NEWS I changed my phone music EQ setting from SPOKEN WORD to NOTHING.  Spoken word is good because obviously lyrics are better but it's also just a generic Treble Boost too.  NOTHING is good though because presumably that's how it was intended!  Wow INTENTIONS?  Great!  I wanna hear more about The Intentions of what I consume.  Maybe later.  I don't feel like it right now.  Wouldn't be able to concentrate and focus!  What else is going on.  I think one flavor of Vitamin Water is FOCUS.  Well that's a good drink when you're in class.  Now you know From The Drink what you're supposed to do.  Also I crunched the numbers and I still think I am in 28th grade.  For a while I thought it was 27th but then I kept doing Head Math and I'm back to 28th.  Hmm this should have been the kind of thing we covered in 19th grade.  What else is going on.  Also I think I read they're still including Universal Pre-K as part of the Build Ba Bill?  This may sound stupid but does that apply to EVERYONE?  It says universal.  So if I WANTED I assume there's a spot for me in Nursery School?  At least for one or two semesters?  You know that sort of thing.
Another paragraph down!  What else is going on.  I'm gonna be honest I could benefit A LOT from nursery school.  At first I was imagining it Billy Madison style where I interact with 4 year olds.  Which would somewhat be useful to me, sure. But even better, what about Adult Nursery School.  Where it's 80% the same thing as Child Nursery School but with Adults.  And it's not a Sex Thing.  No one is dressing in diapers and/or getting off somehow.  We're just getting a refresher course on The Basics.  Educational AND Social.  Anyway that's something to think about when hammering out the details.  What else is going on.  HEY They Have Adult Nursery School it's called...  Hmm.  There IS a joke here.  There is a way I can finish that sentence that is amusing and makes sense.  My first thought was Community College.  But I'm not sure that's the 100% perfect reference for the joke. I'm gonna have to think about this and get back to you.  I will neither think more about this or get back to you.  Oh well that's life.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  MAGIC THE GATHERING Tournaments.  That's a terrible reference not just for this joke but for any joke.  Oh well that's life, too!  Both what I said to end the last paragraph, whatever that was, Was Life and now This New Thing Is Life.  Ugh.  Gonna take a nice bath soon.  Cleanse myself to an extent I'm comfortable with.  That's how that goes!  Is it just me or is Jurassic Park Kind Of unrealistic.  I can point to SEVERAL parts of the plot that wouldn't actually happen in the real world If This Kind Of Thing Was Going On.  Why would Wayne Knight be so greedy to sell Jurassic Park Secrets to rival company.  Wayne Knight is a decent guy all in all and I don't think he would actually do that.  That's one example of a problem I have in this movie!  You know that sort of thing.  That's one way to write the last 2/3rds of this paragraph.  I regret nothing!
     Last paragraph for now.  Some music can be too chill.  Gotta watch out for that.  Some music can be too HOT.  But that's more obvious.  Everyone knows some music where they're concerned about the heat.  May not come to mind immediately that music can be too cold.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  What's the sweet spot.  37 Degrees Celsius.  What's that.  Like 70 degrees Fahrenheit.  Lemme LTURQ.  98.6!  Which makes sense.  Because that's Body Temperature.  So it makes sense that I would come up with the number 37 Degrees Celsius because it IS a VERY relevant number to us Humans.  Also 98 Degrees: The Boy Band call themselves 36.67 Degrees when touring in Europe. And Everywhere Else.  Just not America.  Possibly Britain.  Lemme LTURQ.  JUST AMERICA, CAYMAN ISLANDS AND LIBERIA.  LIBERIA?  I'm gonna be honest I expected better from Liberia.  I was even thinking in my head before checking well definitely Liberia FOR SURE is Celsius.  The point is I'm gonna take a bath now.  See ya in a bit.





Paragraphs Are Important Too

    I GUESS.  Took a bath!  Went okay!  Got some vitamin water left.  The real question is whether I'll have two today or two tomorrow.  I think two TODAY.  Ancillary soda today is Orange and tomorrow is Sprite.  This is LEMON Vitamin Water.  Makes sense to have more Lemon Water on the day I don't have Lemon Soda.  Okay Great Now We're All Caught Up On Where My Life Is At.  So I got that going for me.  Probably gonna have a 45 minute to an hour break between Entry and Walk.  I can accomplish so much!  HOWEVER the BEST thing I can accomplish is Saving The So Much For Later.  Really get myself going, priming myself for The Stuff I Have instead of BLOWING IT right now when the entry is over.  Also Chucky is one thing.  I'm assuming there's other things, too.  At the very least Dropping Jurassic Park I and going back to Tales From The Crypt as Generic Thing To Put On TV.  I'll have a lot of fun Ditching Jurassic Park.  I thinks it's so great!  But it is So Not!
     Wonderful.  How many walks am I taking today.  Probably seven!  Sounds okay to me.  Trying to think about how many walks to take For The Rest Of My Life after dieting to lose weight.  Hard thing to figure out!  Gotta take in on a Season-By-Season basis.  One season I may have different life parameters than the last season!  Which would heavily influence how many walks I wanna take!  And when!  You get the point.  Probably.  Not a hard point to get.  You may not get WHY you had to get the point.  It's an easy point to understand but it's a hard point to care about.  So there's that.  Maybe just watch Chucky when entry is over.  I feel like I'm Primed Enough Already.  Also I don't know what else to do.  Save that for later!  I can not know what else to do for the rest of my life for the rest of my life, only NOW can I watch episode II of That Chucky Show as I believe it's stylized.
     Cool!  My dad keeps sneezing from downstairs.  Somebody tell him I Need To CONCENTRATE.  What else is going on.  Hey haven't played some Rocksmith lately.  I think I will today.  I don't particularly want to as of now but I DO want to do it anyway even if I don't want to.  Makes sense!  An appropriate amount of sense.  I assume the boy band named themselves 98 degrees so that we don't get confused and think they're zombies.  Everyone knows zombies are room temperature and not normal body temperature because they're dead.  That's the only reason I can think of for them to name themselves that.  Also... kinda makes ya think... ME THINK THE LADY DOTH PROTEST TOO MUCH.  THESE GUYS ARE PROBABLY ZOMBIES.  Also NSYNC?  Me thinks the lady doth protest too much.  These guys are WAY OUT OF SYNC.  Backstreet Boys?  I THINK THESE BOYS ARE FROM THE FRONT OF THE STREET AND I'D BET MY LIFE ON IT.  What else is going on. 
     I don't know if I'd bet my life on The Backstreet Boys being from the front of the street.  That's a little too rich stakes for my blood.  Well, unless I stand to win A LOT.  Otherwise I'd bet maybe six months of my life.  Maybe a year.  What else is going on.  Some :08 Baseball games going on today.  I don't know what they're thinking.  I have yet to see one explanation for their reasoning for setting up these game times.  Also there's two kinds of people in the world  The kind of people who are like we gotta get there for the national anthem!  And the kind of people who are like SHIT WE GOT HERE SO EARLY THAT WE GOTTA HEAR THE SHITTY NATIONAL ANTHEM.  Also A Bunch Of Other Kinds Of People.  But the point is who needs to hear the national anthem.  I don't care!  When I was a kid I might have been in Camp One.  Hey I'm a kid I want the whole baseball game experience INCLUDING national anthem.  I grew up, though!  We all gotta grow up some day!
     Last paragraph of the day!  Also I'm gonna be honest still waiting for the day that I'll Grow Up.  Any day now!  I can feel it!  What else is going on.  I feel like I even wanted to show up so early that I could see batting practice.  Luckily my Dad or whoever was taking me never actually took us that early.  I'd pity them in the future that I made them do that in the past.  Now, with that never happening, we're all on even ground!  Huh.  I wonder what other kinds of appointments I'm having today that I forgot about.  My guess is none.  I'd bet my life on it!  Or at least 3-5 years of my life.  The point is Hey The Entry Is Almost Just About Over.  Hey I still got tape over Cable Box Time.  Got TV and Cable Box in Early July.  Went a period of 1-3 days in late July without the tape.  Otherwise it's been there and I've been getting a lot out of it1  I don't constantly know the exact time!  Just as I planned!  Good deal!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:50 P.M.






Tuesday, October 19, 2021

We're All In This Together

    Hello friends!  Another day is upon us.  Damn DAYS always being UPON us.  Wait if Days Are Good as they sometimes are then being Upon Us is also good.  You're really taking a stand assuming Day Will Be Good.  If nothing else I feel like I'm Here To Prove You Wrong.  I'm gonna make you sure today is crappy if it's the last thing I do!  Hopefully I'll do more things.  For my sake!  Cool morning today!  That's strike One.  Had to wear winter jacket and skull cap for first time since... possibly last year?  NAH I left the house once a month for Winter One of 2021.  I wore this Get-Up before!  The point is DON'T LIKE IT.  I like a bit of a chilly but this is BEYOND Chilly and just plain CHILL.  And I Don't Play That Game.  I KEPT ON LOSING.  So I stopped completely!  I don't like color commentators and TV/Radio announcers calling homeruns in baseball games.  80% of the time they set up their call like WILL IT GO OUT?  I DUNNO... GETTING CLOSER TO SEEING IF IT GOES OUT... and I gotta imagine with their experience watching baseball all the time they have a pretty good idea whether it'll be a homerun or not.  QUIT BEING OVERDRAMATIC JUST BE HONEST.  That's my main advice to baseball announcers.  Just Be Yourself!
     Sure.  Boy oh boy do baseball announcers have fun debating something was a check swing or not.  Now they get to make their deepest darkest opinions known to a wide audience and they ain't letting this opportunity go without savoring it!  Hmm.  Gonna shave next weekend.  Shaving twice a month from now on!  I feel excited to Be A Real Boy.  I mean A Real Man.  I'm A Real Man Boy.  Something resembling that.  I think we should be more aware of the snacks and/or meals baseball commentators are eating.  Gotta imagine they binge during commercial breaks and/or when partner is talking.  I wanna HEAR them eating pizza.  And be like MMM HMM THIS IS GOOD.  LET'S KEEP IT GOING.   HERE COMES BABE RUTH BACK FROM THE DEAD TO HE PLATE.  Wait a second that might have been pycschedelic pizza.  That's not responsible to eat!  Not on live TV at least!  Psychedelic?  Sounds like MYSTIC Pizza to me!  You know the main Pizza-centric Film of the last half century.  Which I think we decided is about two rival pizza places and they each are trying to win some sort of Competition?  PROBABLY Pizza related?
    HEY I thought of a, "Joke," yesterday after the entry.  It's not really good because It's Not Funny, I've Probably Said It Before, and I Know In My Heart Of Hearts I shouldn't say it either way.  But here it is!  I survived the Holocaust!  It wasn't particularly difficult because I Wasn't Then Or There but it's still somewhat of an accomplishment.  THANK YOU.  I will take your PRAISE E-MAIL as well as your COMPLAINING E-MAIL at mankindguy at gmail dot com.  Also if you decide not to e-mail me Which Is The Biggest Insult Of All you can send that No E-mail to whatever e-mail you want!  I'll get the message either way!  What else is going.  On!  I went to the Holocaust Museum.  I assume they have a gift shop selling shirts saying I SURVIVED THE HOLOCAUST!... MUSEUM!  However that'd be pretty controversial!  They'd probably have to stop selling them THE NEXT DAY after they first went up for sale!
     Fourth paragraph!  Creeping up towards coffee time!  What's the MOST FUN exhibit or activity in Holocaust Museum.  There's gotta be SOME things that are fun.  Right now the most fun thing is I think they have a computer, which in 1997 was the height of technology, that you can browse a database of Holocaust Dead and find your relatives.  And I feel like 1997, we all had personal computers and 90% of us had the internet, but still A DATABASE?  LEMME AT IT.  I WANNA PLAY WITH THE COMPUTER.  Anyway.  Ball pit.  Gotta imagine there was a ball pit SOMEWHERE in the museum.  To represent... parts... of the Holocaust.  The ball pit part!  What else is going on?  Also are there adult ball pits anywhere.  Gotta imagine SOMEWHERE.  Business or Pleasure or Private.  Adult Swim Only!  Ball Pit Swim!  I envy them. 
     Great.  Been doing way too many sit-ups and push-ups.  I do 16 each at a time.  And it's enough times a day that I can hardly even estimate it appropriately.  20-30 times off the top of my head.  POSSIBLY more.  PROBABLY not less.  The point is I've been doing this for a solid two weeks and so far I'm Still Alive So I Got That Going For Me.  Possible I would have died somehow if I didn't start doing this.  I don't have all the details but hey anything's possible am I right.  Except for me dying from not doing sit-ups.  Pretty impossible.  Oh well live and learn.  It's 16 for both Set Ups and Push Downs separately at a time because I think 15 is a standard number to do at a time.  And I just round off estimating that I Fail Doing 1 Of Them each set.  So I go with 16.  Pretty good Estimation Routine I got Going.  Not unhappy with that Estimation Adjustment at all.
     I've talked about my push up/sit up routine before.  Probably relatively recently!  Odds are VERY low I talked about it before I started doing it.  The point is It's Important so it shows up again.  Whose gonna stop me you?  Hmm maybe you will.  Well the ball is in your court now!  Anyway sure I got coffee going on now.  That happens every day.  But I'm happy about it!  It makes me happy and whatnot.  SO FAR I still got my bottle of coffeemate going.  This is the NINTH day its lasting me and I was aiming for 10 days.  So it would confirm how much I've been estimating I drink it.  IT MAY EVEN MAKE IT TO ELEVEN DAYS.  Wow The Number Eleven?  NEVER FORGET!  It's supposed to be paired with some other number, though.  Either before or after it.  CRAP I FORGOT.  Whatever.  Also are we supposed to Never Forget 9/11 or Never Forget The Holocaust.  Make up your mind!  I can't remember TWO things.  I GOT PLACES TO BE.
     Seventh paragraph!  Wonderful.  I know time travelers want to go back in time and kill Hitler but you could do even better by going back in time and disguising yourself AS Hitler.  Then lead Germany Dummies into Doing Good.  HEY YOU ALL LIKE ME RIGHT?  WELL GUESS WHAT WE'RE GONNA DO TODAY.  PLANT SOME TREES.  That's the best thing I can think of doing.  Planting a tree.  Not sure how that benefits me but the tree'll be happy at least when it grows up.  What else is going on.  Unless they're Evil Trees.  Some trees are evil!  Trees are like people.  Some are good and some are bad.  And Nazises Planting Trees, gotta imagine those trees are more likely to turn out to be Nazis than your random average tree!  Ugh.  What else is going on.  I like watching Horror Movies in Spanish better than any other language.  HEY I GET A LOT OF THESE WORDS.  I'M SOME SORT OF GENIUS.  THIS FILM THOUGHT IT WAS BETTER THAN ME BUT IT WAS WRONG.  IT IS STILL SLIGHTLY BETTER THAN ME BUT NOT AS MUCH AS IT THINKS.
Eighth paragraph!  Amazing.  Watched the Complete 1991 Adams' Family. Pretty good!  I was entertained.  Also the characters were all likeable.  Except for WEDNESDAY.  Look, cute kid, great.  But she's always putting her sibling(s?) at risk by trying to kill them.  BE CAREFUL.  I know death is all fun and games IN THEORY but you don't REALLY want your brother to die!  So that upsets me.  What else is going on.  Also the brother Pugsly is kind of just seeming like a normal kid?  Look he's just a fat kid.  He's not explicitly into Death or Morbidity.  Well Morbid OBESITY maybe!  GOTTEM.  I don't think morbidity means what I think it means.  Well what I THOUGHT it means.  Now I don't know what I think it is.  I think it is different than what I thought it is.  Okay that covers that.  The point is this kid needs an attitude adjustment!
     Ninth paragraph.  I always assumed that person in Adams Family who is Just Hair was a lady.  Now I see that it's a fella!  EXCUSE ME it looked like Lady Hair To Me.  Get off my back about it.  Cousin ITT.  I always thought it was Cousin IT.  Shows how much I know!  A LOT.  I still know a lot.  But it shows I Don't Know This.  This is one of literally THOUSANDS of things to know in the world and, no, I do not know it.  Not a huge mark against me all things considered.  What else is going on.  HMM baseball game at a reasonable time today.  5:08 PM.  FIVE OH EIGHT?  WHAT THE HELL IS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN.  I just got over there being :07 games because I figured it was :07.5 which could make sense.  :.08?  THIS MAKES NO SENSE AND BOY OH BOY AM I ANGRY OVER IT.  The point is yeah I'll probably turn that game on for a few minutes either at the beginning or the end.  POSSIBLY between the beginning and the end.
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Are they just rounding :07.5 UP?  They better not be that's all I can say!  Huh.  Hmm.  Wonder if weather has warmed up in the last hour and 15 minutes such that I can wear Warm New Sweatshirt Jacket.  Let's GO TO THE VIDEO TAPE.  By which I mean Google.  HEY it's a bit warmer.  I could Chance It and wear New Warm Sweatshirt Jacket.  I think I'll do that.  If nothing else I am a man who takes chances.  Positive chances!  Community Chest is more safe but I like Chance!  This is common knowledge, right.  They did studies and determined you're better off with a Community Chest than a Chance.  I feel like we all know and accept this.  And if not I just provided Public Service!  Also why would there be negative things AT ALL in a community chest.  Just to keep community on it's toes.  Oh okay I get it.  Hey I'll be back in a little bit!




Except For You

    Hello friends.  Dad is making a Gmail account.  Very exciting!  They didn't have his first choice!  They offered adding Numbers to the end.  Not sure what his next move is.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.  Well maybe once it's done progressing.  I probably won't have an update until it's over and done with.  Either way great just great.  Here's something I've written before but it just came up so I'll repeat myself-- farting is a great way to scratch your asshole from the inside out!  This comes up pretty often in life.  Good life lesson.  Anyway what else is going on.  Taking a nice cleansing activity after this act right here.  In the meantime I have to write more things that I may or may not have written before.  Hmm.  What if I wrote something new.  Well it can't hurt to dream I guess!
     Wonderful.  Why do people reach for the stars.  Do they actually think they can reach the stars?  And then what do they do if they can? Grab 'em and keep 'em for themselves?  Kinda insensitive to everyone else.  Very selfish!  Maybe they just dream of having really long arms.  The stars are more the means to an end in this situation.  They just want really long arms that they CAN get the stars if they wanted to.  Makes sense.  Dad is thinking of using first initial and last name as e-mail address.  They didn't have that without any fancy punctuations or numbers.  Then he considered entire first name and last name.  I advise against that!  Gotta keep some things close to the vest.  You don't want everyone knowing Who You Are.  Also he used to have a AOL name MATH1000 so I suggested using the number 1000 as a call back to that.  Everyone likes call backs!  Except for a lot of people.  Hmm sounds about right.
I don't feel like I'm giving away too much information with Math1000 aht AOL dhot com.  I kinda DO feel like I'm giving away too much information.  But I also feel like that feeling is WRONG.  What else is going on.  I feel like I've asked my Dad why 1000 several times throughout my life and I don't recall ever getting a good answer.  He's playing this one pretty close to the vest I guess.  Why do people play things close to the vest.  What is it about their vest that they trust so much above other people.  Must be SOME VEST that's all I can say.  What else is going on.  Are we supposed to relate to The Addams Family particularly the Raul Julia and Angelica Houston.  And if we are are we supposed to relatively self conscious about it?  I'm looking for answers!  Also, at some point will I realize there's two, "D's," in The Adams Family?  YES!  I will!  I realized it already In The Past.  I just don't care!
     Wonderful.  Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I'm moving through this one like it was nothin'.  Hey it IS kind of nothin'.  Well then everything's going perfectly I guess!  Other baseball game today is at 8:08.  What's wrong with people.  Who the Hell is coming up with these :08 Start Times.  Is it one person or some sort of Baseball Time Committee at Major League Baseball Headquarters.  I demand answers!  If not now then eventually!  And if not eventually then never!  What else is going on.  I think they originally wanna start games at :00's but they just keep putting it off.  Hey we're supposed to set the time NOW if we wanna reach the :00 deadline... hmm.. what else is going on... let's get DISTRACTED for eight minutes... Uh Oh We Just Wasted Eight Minutes now we REALLY better set up the time of the game immediately!  That makes sense.  Lots of sense!  So much sense that it almost makes sense!
     Last paragraph of the act.  Took a klonopin the last 2 days.  I have an insane amount of bonus klonpin though so I'm good for now.  Even if I take it every day!  Which I may or may not.  On the one hand it'd be bad if I feel I have to take it.  On the other hand if I feel I have to take it I GET TO TAKE IT.  Glass is half full either way.  How can the glass be half full either way.  You ask me ONCE is the glass half full or empty.  I say half full.  Five minutes later You Ask Me AGAIN.  SAME ANSWER.  Oh okay.  Maybe 5 minutes later it's half empty.  Some of the water that was there originally may or may not have evaporated over those several minutes.  I'll have to think about this one.  UNLESS the glass FROM THE START was more than half full.  In which case I Don't Care Anymore.  Ugh.  Bath today.  NO shower.  HEY I just remembered gotta start a new bar of soap.  Fun!  Who doesn't love a full bar of soap.  Some people.  I pity them.  I'll be back soon! 




Also It's Only Me

    Hey.  I'm all cleansed and everything!  So I got that going for me.  Got a whole lotta day coming up after this set of 5 paragraphs.  Walking.  TV.  OTHER STUFF.  Like the stuff between walking and watching TV.  Like putting on my jacket and whatnot.  Taking two pieces of gum to chew.  That's fun!  THEN START CHEWING THE GUM.  SO first I put on jacket.  Then I take two pieces of gum.  Then I think and/or feel That's Fun!  Then start chewing gum.  Yep great just great.  Gonna get coffee in a few sentences.  See where my Dad is on this Creating An E-Mail Address Internet Excursion To Remember.  I heard him talking on the phone before my bath.  Over 50% chance it was Gmail Customer Support and he was having trouble.  That's My Dad for ya!  Always talking to customer support.  He just can't get enough of it!
     Got coffee.  My Dad was indeed talking to  customer support.  And he has indeed Given Up for the day.  Not on HIMSELF or on LIFE.  Just on creating a G-mail account.  He doesn't give up LIFE that easily!  Gonna take MORE THAN ONE negative experience for that.  Roughly five or six consecutive negative experiences probably!  What else is going on.  Gonna have a nice long break between entry and walk.  I said that yesterday and it turned out to be a lie.  My Dad changed up when he wanted to take his walk and as a result my best option was take a walk only minutes after the entry ended.  This time around?  Probably gonna be an hour!  An hour and 15 minutes maybe!  Then again we've PROOVEN that Anything Can Happen so I can't say 100% what's going to happen re: Me Taking Walks.  Nor other things.  But mainly This Thing.
     Third paragraph of the Act!  I can go with Symmetry With Yesterday and watch the next Adams' Family movie this early early afternoon.  Or I can mix things up!  That's the eternal question ain't it.  Same Early Early Afternoon as yesterday or mix it up.  No that is not the eternal question.  I think we can safely say that.  If you make a list of the top 100,000 questions, ranking them eternally, that not only isn't near the top of the list but it doesn't make the list at all one bit!  Anyway.  Has anyone made the pun that the Porn version of upcoming Super Hero Franchise The Eternals will be called The Internals?  Because I'd like to make that pun HERE AND NOW in case it hasn't been made yet.  Internal means sex.  Lots of sex involves someone's internals somehow.  That's my point of view!  What was the porn version of Previous Super Hero Franchise The Avengers.  The.. uh.. The.. SEX...VENGERS.  Hmm lemme think about this for a moment.
     Penultimate paragraph of the day!  I don't believe it.  Am I supposed to be seeing films in the cinemas again?  I feel like I'm still not supposed to.  Parents are triple vaxxed but STILL.  Oh well.  Also I can't watch a movie for 2 hours without a bathroom break.  I'd need several bathroom breaks!  I feel like when I was still smoking I'd take 3 bathroom breaks and 2 smoke breaks for each 90 minute movie. GOOD I'm gonna be honest this movie wasn't really great anyway.  I got more out of taking a smoke break and/or bathroom break than I was getting out of this worthless movie!  No offense.  What else is going on.  Also for a while my main time of drinking beer was before movie.  Anyway.  Been thinking the last few nights hey I'd have a drink now all things being equal.  Oh well.  All things AREN'T equal.  I'm not happy about it either but that's just the world we live in! 
     Last paragraph of the day.  What else is going on.  Plan is to get a couple of beers or Single Shot Glass Bottles of Alcohol for upcoming birthday.  Celebrate it the only way I know how!-- Drinking Alone.  Hey sounds like a blast and a half.  Also presumably tell my parents about it.  It would be less fun and special knowing my parents are downstairs judging me.  But it would also be less fun and special fretting about keeping secrets from my parents.  Hmm.  I can split the difference and tell them about one beer and not the 2nd beer.  That's a reasonable compromise to make.  Sounds about right.  What else is going on.  I enjoy this new sweatshirt jacket!  Comfortable material.  Good Warmness for now and upcoming weeks.  Lookin' stylish.  Comfortable hood that stays on.  And best of all It Was A Gift Of Love from my Mom.  Wow Gifts Of LOVE? From My PARENTAL UNITS?  Sounds good to me!  So I got that going on for me!  The point is I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:23 P.M. 




Monday, October 18, 2021

I Came Up With This Title Yesterday

    Hi friends.  You can tell I wrote the title yesterday because it doesn't refer to Colin Powell's death.  It's not HIS death it belongs to All Of Us!  I guess so.  Either way that's life I guess.  Got some strange sort of Face Headache.  It's like a light headache but centralized around the edges of my face!  Fun.  It's slightly painful and/or uncomfortable but it's a new experience and if nothing else I am a man who is a fan of new experiences.  Also the If Nothing Else part comes into play but There Is Plenty Else.  Anyway.  Not sure if doing a Face/Off would help or would hurt.  A new face might be Problem Solved, but maybe the process of Face/Offing would only exacerbate my uncomfortability!  Luckily Face/Off isn't a real option.  Way out of my price range!  Also there's the burden of picking out a good face.  I don't have the time or money!
     What else is going on.  You don't need to do a one-on-one trade in Face/Offing, right?  Why would you.  You get one person's face, you get a third person's face, the third person gets some 2015th person's face...  Why limit yourself to one-and-one trades!  Makes NO SENSE.  Everything else about Face/Offs MAKES SENSE.  What else is going on.  Hmm.  Face/Off sounds fun but what I'd really like to do one day is a Con Air.  Not sure what that means.  It means a lot.  That's why I said it!  Makes sense.  I believe the sequel to Con Air was Con Ed and it was about an Energy Company.  Is that a universally known energy company?  I feel like it might have been localized in New York specifically AND it may be out of business for the last 20 years.  All I know is they talked about it on New York One a lot I think.  I just vaguely remember them always like CON ED is in the news again, etc.  Anyway better LTURQ.  HEY YEAH.  Con Edison.  For New York City and Westchester.  Still around, though!  Good for them.  I underestimated their business plan for the 21st century!  Anyway.  Feels like the Ghost Busters must have interacted with Con Edison a few times.  The time they went into the sewer.  The time they were in trouble for using too much energy or something.  Always butting heads with Con Ed.
     Jeez.  Got coffee a-brewin!  Wonderful.  Hmm what kind of power does Con Ed use.  ELECTRIC.  Yeah but where do they get the electric power.  I'm guessing an Unsafe Bad For The Environment way!  Because that's what everyone else does!  Why should they be any different.  THEY'RE COVERING LOTS OF BASES.  Not just one.  FOUR  Wow four REALLY IS all the bases.  Never seen a baseball game with any more or any less.  EVER!  My Dad used to tell me when he was very young and they'd play baseball people would stop at Short Stop like it was a base because they didn't know better.  So basically they used five bases.  Is this relevant to Con Ed's business plan?  What else is going on.  I think you should have to pick up bases as you cross them and stack 'em each time you pass a new base.  Just add a little bit extra to the game.  I dunno.  I don't really think that.  I'm not insane.  More or less I'm Not at least.
     The Braves are doing the best in Last 2 Series Of Baseball.  I VERY EXPLICITLY said they were the team I was rooting for the least.  What are he odds!?!  On the other hand I was VERY EXPLICIT about liking their Team Name Abbreviation ATL the best of the remaining Team Name Abbreviations.  But I hardly get to see that at all this time around.  Once it's the playoffs it's all Atlanta This and The Braves That.  No one ever goes ATL IS UP TO THEIR WINNING WAYS AGAIN...  Except for me. I  just Went That.  Kinda makes it all worth it more or less.  Also if The Braves win the world series they're gonna be cocky as hell come Spring Training.  It will intimidate the Mets!  I'm worried the Mets will be intimidated in spring training and not know how to get over it.  That's how Middling Baseball Teams react and adjust to being confronted by Winners, right?  Being intimidated and not knowing how to get over it.  Sounds about right.
     Think I'm gonna start some Vitamin Water Zero-- The Squeezed Effect-- right now.  And then next paragraph start coffee.  Hmm Hmm I could Sqoozen this bottle.  Once it's half full or so.  When it's completely full not much squeezing you can do.  Little give and take!  All the more reason to drink it.  Also because I'm thirsty and like the taste.  Now I have bonus reasons this is great.  Anyway.  How could it have ZERO Sugar.  Everything has sugar.  A little bit!  I wouldn't be surprised if the air we breath has SOME sugar in it.  I'd be TAKEN ABACK.  I'd be FLABBERGASTED.  I dunno about being Surprised though!  That's one bridge too far.  Damn bridge being too far away.
Now I gotta find a closer bridge!  And I'm busy today!  Forget what I'm doing.  But having To Just Live Consciously For Another 13 Hours sounds like a lotta work to me.
     Kinda weird that when we talk about head aches we always talk about the top of your head.  Look, there's a lot more to your head than your scalp and up.  Why doesn't anyone talk about CHIN ACHES.  Either because they don't happen OR because people have a mental block about it.  I feel like I don't remember having chin aches but it's like dreams.  They happen and then when you wake up you can't remember them.  I've had dozens of chin aches but I can't for the life of me remember a single one!  Also for YOUR lives.  Also, ONLY for your lives.  Why risk The Life Of Me when I can get into Using The Life Of You As Collateral.  Huh.  Anyway sixth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Children of the corn is on Shutter: The Screaming Service!  Not a great movie but I always liked it because it's my Namesake.  On account of Korn being the first of two syllables in my last name.  ALSO it's about KIDS.  I was a kid in the first of two phases of my life.  More or less, right?  Turning 33.  16.5 cut off age from kid to adult!  WOW I'm pretty much Still A Kid by that logic!  Not sure that's accurate.  DON'T TAKE THIS FROM ME I WANNA BE A KID AGAIN.
Seventh paragraph.  I guess!  Been doing way too much push ups and/or sit ups.  The results speak for themselves, though!  It doesn't hurt or feel like I'm exerting myself SLIGHTLY as much as last week doing it.  Every week kids a bit easier!  WOW at this rate I Will Never Feel Pain Or Hardship Again.  Well that's good news.  That's GREAT news.  Then again We Must Feel Pain.  Otherwise how would we know we're in trouble!  They say that about those freaks who can't feel physical pain.  Oh well they'll just accidentally set themselves on fire and burn to death because they can't even tell.  Gotta imagine that extents to mental or emotional pain.  Hey that person just accidentally fell in love with a girl who didn't love him back.  YET HE FEELS NOTHING.  Now he's going to die or something somehow because of lack of pain.  I Don't Have All The Details!
     Eighth paragraph.  I imagine doing a Face/Off would be a good sequel to Call Me By Your Name.  And it's called Look At Me With My Face.  Wonderful.  Never saw that movie but I'm let's say 75% sure I'm getting the gist of it accurately from the title.  Such that my joke makes sense.  Anyway what else is going on.  Two and a half paragraphs roughly left to go with Act I!  Wonderful.  All I had to do was spend six paragraphs speculating about Con Edison.  Do they have a LEGIT connection to Thomas Edison?  Or is that just a clever PR move.  Better LTURQ.  I started looking it up BUT I GOT TIRED.  I do think Thomas Edison is from New York, though.  So they're halfway there is the point.  Thomas Edison is from the Midwest and then moved to New Jersey.  Well that's halfway there.  New Jersey is New York.  I don't feel like that's too controversial a position!
    It's just Dumb.  No one takes it seriously.  It can't be controversial if Everyone Agrees It Means Nothing.  Right?  Anyway ninth paragraph.  I may be thinking of the Steam Ship Guy.  The guy who is friends with Canals.  Who am I thinking of.  Thomas Edison made the Steam Engine.  Is that what I'm thinking of?  Boy I Hope Not.   The point is let's move on with your life.  EERIE CANAL.  That might be a specific thing relevant to the guy I'm thinking of.  Let's LTURQ.  I don't see anyone famous involved with Erie Canal.  I've heard of EERIE Canal.  It's a canal that's spooky.  I've heard of EAR Canal.  It's a canal that we have 2 of in your head.  ERIE Canal?  That's nonsense!  OH wait I heard of Erie Canal it's hat thing I've been talking about.  Wow that's three canals I know!  That's more than most people!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I know Canal Street.  I feel like I crossed it all the time!  Especially dorming at Lafayette in NYU.  AT LEAST twice a day!  Anyway not a fan of canal street TOO BIG a dividing line.  I like streets great, I like significant dividing streets okay, but BIG geographical dividing streets?  Too much pressure going back and forth from one side to the other.  I don't need that kind of change in my life over 2 times a day.  I wanna stay on one side and live my life that way!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta imagine that's where A Canal Used To Be.  Right?  That would make a lot of sense.  Anyway Colin Powell fucked up getting America into Iraq War BUT I don't like reading he had Coronavirus Shot and died anyway.  I HAD THAT SHOT.  TWO OF 'EM EVEN.  PROBABLY WILL GET A THIRD AT SOME POINT OVER THE NEXT FEW MONTHS.  I don't want to die!  It'd have a real net negative effect on my life!  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.  And by tomorrow I mean like 40, 45 minutes.




I'm Not Proud Of It Either

    Hello friends.  Got some Diet Dr Pepper going.  I finished the Vitamin Water Zeroe!  That's how that goes.  Have one a day!  Got a 6 pack for the week!  Already went a single day without one so basically I'm Golden for the rest of the week.  Gonna have a nice big break between Entry and Next Walk.  I will accomplish so much.  I will lay in bed.  I will have that moving picture box projecting image and audio at me.  PLUS I get to DECIDE what image/audio combination I'm interested in for now!  Off the top of my head maybe The Simpsons.  I'm a big fan of the audio!  The images I can do without.  Feels like they can cause seizures pretty easily.  I can't believe I haven't had any yet!  But the audio is full with laugh-em-ups and whatnot so you can't argue with that!  I'd like to see you try!  Unless if it's an animated version of you trying and the animation is in Bright Ne-On Simpsons Colors!  Then Here I Go Seizuring Again!
     What else is going on.  How cam Seizuring not be a word.  The only way I can accept it not being a word is if it is a word but I'm misspelling it.  It not being a word at all IS OFFENSIVE TO ME.  Huh.  Colin Powell might be Colin Powell but he couldn't say POW WELL to the Covid Virus.  You say POW to someone it neutralizes it.  Like a gun.  Guns go POW.  So he tried to shoot the virus Well and failed.  I feel very strongly about this.  I went into it not feeling strongly about it but by the time I was done I felt strongly about it.  What else is going on.  Yesterday I took eight walks.  So much fun!  I can't express how much fun it is to Walk One Bonus Walk At Night.  It's like a special treat!  Then if it becomes the routine who cares It' Fine I Guess.  But then if I do ANOTHER bonus one then we're back in Special Treat Territory!
     Hmm better cut my walks in half for a week.  Down to 3.5 walks a day!  That way I can start doing Bonus Walks once a week and build myself back up that way.  Not sure that makes sense.  Wait yes I am.  I'm sure that makes sense.  Oh okay I didn't see that turn of events.  Is Colin Powell related to Colin Farrell?  Not biologically.  I mean Thematically.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  I did look into it!  I actually typed both their names into google.  FINE I'LL ADMIT IT it wasn't so much to see if they're related thematically as much as it was a way to confirm I'm spelling both their two names right.  THAT'S FOUR WORDS OVERALL I COULD BE GETTING WRONG.  Bu I'm not!  I'm happy to say I was right on all counts going into Asking The Internet.  "Colin Powell died after Complications of COVID-19."  IT'S NOT COMPLICATED.  HE DIED FROM COVID.  SIMPLE.  STOP TRYING TO USE YOUR DOUBLESPEAK TO CONFUSE PEOPLE.  YEAH.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!
  Still going through Classic Music Albums I loved as a child.  Also, I include being a late teenager as a child.  Nineteen through Eleventeen is still me being a child.  Either way roughly 4 albums down, roughly 1000 to go.  Well when I put it that way I'm gonna be done with this in no time.  Already WAY MORE than 1/250th there.  I crunched the numbers pretty well off the top of my head, what of it.  What else is going on.  The good news is there's probably DOZENS of great music albums I will love that I haven't heard yet at all. We're talking possibly upwards of FORTY.  Amazing.  This paragraph is the pits.  I haven't said a single joke yet.  Fourty.  I learnt something.  I wrote Fourty instead of Forty at first.  But Fourty isn't a word and Forty is.  I've learned that before.  Yes but clearly not well enough.  I've got to learn something roughly forty or Fourty times before it sinks in.  Dependending on what it is.
     Last paragraph before bath!  That's great.  Nineteen through Eleventeen.  Never Forget.  That sort of thing.  I wasn't going to forget!  I don't need to explicitly be told to not forget the events of 9/11.  I have a decent memory and this is the sort of thing that's gonna stick relatively easily!  It might not come to mind every single day but if something prompts me to think about it or something I won't be like wait what's that again?  Don't Worry I Got It Covered!  Anyway what else is going on.  Watch some Shutter: The Screaming Service today.  I feel like that'd be entertaining enough and I got a fair amount of movies and Original Mini-Series saved up to last me a while!  So I got all that going for me is the point.  All what.  Movies and TV to watch that may last me roughly a week.  Oh that sounds like a lot to have going for oneself is the point.  EXACTLY.  I'll be back soon! 




Oh Well What Can You Do

    Wonderful.  Gotta write some paragraphs.  Take a nice break!  Coffee is involved at some point during the paragraphs.  Got a lotta fun stuff for today!  My Dad is teaching tonight.  I like it because he likes it.  I think he likes it!  He'd like it better if it was IRL (in real life) but I think he gets something out doing it OTC (On The Computer).  I feel like OTC is a real Initials Abbreviation for something.  Better LTURQ.  WAIT off the top of my head OFF THE CLOCK and/or ON THE CLOCK.  Which may be used in Sports lingo!  Or in Time Keeping Lingo!  Either way let's LTURQ.  Over The Counter trading.  Which I believe is a Stock Office Financial Deal thing.  Not what I was thinking about!  Let's see if there's any back up definitions.  That appears to be it.  I think I'd be better off without this Initial Abbreviation concept at all!  I don't TRUST it.  I'm assuming that people are using OTC to SCREW the working class.  THOSE ASSHOLES.
     Not 100% sure what class I'm in.
  I dunno I'm gonna have to look into that one.  What else is going on.  I can be in one class and still root for another class!  It's called being a Class Traitor and it's all the rage.  Anyway I poured myself some coffee so I got that going on.  My Dad is peer pressuring me into helping him figure out how to send photos from his computer to my Mom's phone.  I can think of several possible solutions and I can think of several solutions that I don't know yet and it's not an emergency right now so I Don't Care!  If it was an emergency I'd bite the bullet and spend 10-20 minutes helping them figure it out.  No emergency!  Time for me to move on with my life!  I LIKE those odds.  Started watching The Adams Family movie.  The one from my childhood.  The one that There's Two Of Them.  I think I've seen bits and pieces of these two films but maybe not ever in completion.  Possibly the 2nd one in completion.  The point is great I can see myself being solidly entertained by this selection of sound and sight projected at me.
Three paragraphs to go!  Wonderful.  I think TV has really gotten the message that people like Horror and Halloween themed TV and Movie because they've been leaning into playing Horror Movies and TV all the time for Halloween since the end of July.  I like it!  At least TV is getting something right!  What else is going on.  Maybe one day every film or TV show will be Halloween Themed.  I hope not.  I also like Goof-em-ups Comedy Films.  I like it when actors play fictionalized versions of themselves.  It's funny AND it makes ya think.  Sure great what else is going on.  Listening for some sort of Amazon delivery now.  Should arrive within the next couple of hours.  For some reason Only I can accept boxes which are delivered.  It may have started as a Pandemic Quarantine Precaution but I kinda feel like at this point we shouldn't be worried because my parents are triple vaccinated.  I also feel it MAY have started before Pandemic Quarantine even started.  Only I can properly take a box from in front of the front door and move it behind the front door.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Not a Weight Of Box thing.  97% of these box deliveries are light enough my parents should be able to comfortably lift it.  Box deliveries.  Hmm.  I've been assuming that these boxes have things in them but what do I really know.  Maybe my parents are just ordering boxes!  I feel like my entire life has been a lie.  I've always been told either explicitly or implicitly that There's Things Inside Boxes but it turns out Boxes Are Usually Just Empty.  Life lesson.  Makes sense to me.  Also the corollary life lesson is Whether The Box Serves A Purpose Or Not, Only I Can Accept It.  What else is going on.  Watching the first 5 minutes of The Addams Family (1991) my first thought is what was the discussion on the appearance of THING (The Disembodied Hand that is a person).  Was there any thought to making it bloody and/or gross?  My second thought was-- which just came to me now-- was it from 1991 like I'm guessing And I'm A Genius or am I a little bit off.  1991.  GENIUS.
Last paragraph of the day!  Let's make it a good 'un.  I think I always thought Raul Julia was 10 or 20 years older than he really was because I know he died right around these Adam Family Films and The Street Fighter Film.  So I just assumed well he's dead must have died of relative old age.  He was in the prime of his life!  Doesn't seem fair.  I'm assuming he died from an Uppercut from Colonel Guile/Jean-Claude Van Damme then.  He's famous for his powerful uppercuts!  What else is going on.  Gonna take a NICE break between Entry and Walk.  We're talking an hour at least.  Probably more like an hour and 15 minutes!  WOW 15 minutes?  Now we're talking!  Especially when you consider it as an addendum to The Hour That's Happening Already Anyway!  What else is going on.  Nice The Rest Of The Day in store for me.  Gotta be excited about something.  No you don't.  Yeah but I'd encourage it anyway.  Great.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:42 P.M.





Sunday, October 17, 2021

Nobody Ever Listens To Me

    Hello friends.  Got some Vitamin Water Zero: The Squeezed going on right now.  I felt like drinking a non-carbonated beverage!  Or at the very least an un-carbonated beverage.  I'll drink a beverage that was carbonated that is no long carbonated!  Hmm is that accomplished by just Leaving It Out For A While.  If something loses its bubbles completely is it no longer carbonated?  Also is our air Carbonated and that's what Global Warming is?  Gotta imagine Carbonated means + Carbon.  You don't have to imagine it I'll imagine it for ya.   Wait carbon is that Global Warming Gas.  Or is it the building block of Life.  It can't be both!  Better LTURQ.  Oh Right Carbon DIOXIDE.  Special Carbon causes Global Warming.  What kind of Special Carbon is the building block of Life.  Google CARBON BUILDING BLOCK OF LIFE.  Hey this is fun I got as far as Carbon Bui and immediately it prompted me to search Carbon Building Block Of Life.  Google knows the score!  Anyway yes Carbon is Universal Building Block Of Life.  So GOOD because Life Is a Plus.  BAD because Global Warming is The Worst.
Anyway.  Where's Mr. Freeze when you need him.  I know he was originally a bad guy but man oh man can Mr. Freeze potentially help us out re: The Fight Against Climate Change.  Hmm fighting climate change is easy.  Just use Freeze Rays All The Time 24/7 across the globe.  Hire 6000 Francisco Lindors to carry Freeze Rays and go across the country (AND THEN THE WORLD) freezing things!  That's a Build Back Better I imagine everyone would be on board with.  They have NO CHOICE.  They got Francisco Lindors holding FREEZE RAYS to their head.  Literally!  I dunno about that.  What else is going on.  We can't be wasting Freeze Blasts on Congresspeople and Senators.  That's one Blast Of Freezing that goes unused on the environment!  Am I the first person ever to say, "Congresspeople?"  I feel like YES I Am.  Where's my parade.  I hope I never get a parade.  It's too much!  A parade just for me is overdoing it.  Now you know.
What else is going on.  I'll share a parade, sure.  Me and The Lindor Clones can share a parade. 6001 people to celebrate that's reasonable.  The point is maybe You Don't Want A Parade Celebrating Less People Than Are In And/or Watching The Parade.  Hmm sounds like a good rule of thumb.  Why Thumbs Be Having Rules?!?  Let's Talk About It!  We just did.  Oh right that was fun.  BOTH TEAMS I was rooting against in Major League Baseball won yesterday.  What are the odds of that?!?  Roughly one in four.  Oh that sounds reasonable.  Moving on!  Was there ever anyone who was like we're gonna elect a WOMAN to congress?!?  What's Next A DOG?!!  My guess is YES it's possible someone somewhere held a rally in the 19th or early 20th century to make that point.  I don't like it!  But it's an important part of history we can't whitewash.  Also the term whitewash is an important part of history we presumably can't whitewash but I'm not sure exactly what whitewash means so I can't say for certain at this time.
     I'd elect a dog to congress.  A GOOD dog at least.
  Obviously we're considering this on a dog-by-dog basis.  Wonderful.  The point is if we ARE nominating animals to congress gotta imagine Dog is at the top of the list.  They're part of the family already!  Then again maybe you wanna go with Highest Intelligence Animal.  In which case we can choose between Chimps, dolphins, and maybe some sort of parrot.  Parrots aren't smart really but they can give speeches.  Which is a valuable set of traits for a congressanimal I feel.  Parrots can run for president.  Just look at Ross Parrot.  You don't even NEED to look at him.  Just consider him appropriately while reading and COGNATIZING that sentence.  Mission accomplished!  I watched Black Widow yesterday.  It was an okay movie!  I liked the part where hmm I dunno but I liked parts of it believe you me.  Don't believe you me.  You ain't me!  I feel very strongly about this.
     Coffee after this paragraph.  Probably talked about Francisco Lindors being Mr. Freezes before.  It rings some sort of bell.  One can only desperately hope the bell it rings is oh right I talked about it 10 minutes ago.  And that's the extent of the bell!  I dunno, I guess there's no way of knowing.  I can search, "Francisco Lindors," every month going back to the start of the year.  Yeah but I can also NOT do that and that seems like the way to go as of now.  What else is going on.  Got some good stuff in store for today.  Watching TV Activities.  Walking/Listening To Music Activities.  Trying to get back into listening to classic artists and albums from my childhood.  Been a pretty long time that I spent on listening to New New Music and New Old But New To Me Music and My Own Music Which Is Old But New To Me Now And Again Music almost exclusively.  Now I realize I can listen to my favorite albums on walks and it's a real game changer!
    How come whenever there's a new wrinkle in a game it's a game changer.  LOOK you're playing the same game as before.  EXACTLY the same game.  It's just that now there's a new element or change that you have to consider.  Where would we be if In Games every time something happens it starts a new game.  Games would never get completed!  Oh right I can have coffee now.  I had a dream they made a Back To The Future IV and I was watching it and/or in it as an actor and/or participating in it like it was real life.  And it was a kinda shitty movie to watch/be in/experience like it was real!  And then apparently Christopher Lloyd DIED sometime in the making of it so they have to cut things up a bit to accommodate him not finishing all his scenes.  Which made it even worse!  Oh well that's life I guess.  The MAIN part of life!  Anyway.  LOOK we can either have 6000 Francisco Lindors with Freeze Rays OR we can develop a time traveling Delorean.  One or the other!  Gotta decide soon which to pick!
     Hmm we can use the money on time travel and then time travel back in time to take back the money that we would spend on time travel and put it in the Lindors Bank Account.  So we ultimately get to do both!  That checks out completely that would work.  What else is gone.  I think now I know The Hyper Link where I can just watch This Synagogues Shabbat Service every Saturday for free.  HOLY MOLY.  No pun intended!  I get the HOLY part of the pun but not so much the Moley.  Of course not Moley isn't a word or concept.  It's just a nonsense sound!  Impossible to get anything to do with it!  Seventh paragraph.  They had some guy playing acoustic guitar on the Synagogue Show.  I don't think it was the Rabbi.  Some sort of Assistant Rabbi.  Or a Vice Rabbi, I dunno what they're called.  Either way amazing.
What else is going on.  Gotta imagine Old Serious Jews aren't fans of this frivolous nonsense.  The Rabbi & Friends In Charge are desperate for the Youth Target Audience and even the youths don't care about this.  But REAL religious people must be like I RISKED ANGERING GOD BY LEAVING THE HOUSE FOR THIS?  I'd have been better off staying in bed.  This is BULLSHIT.  That's how I would feel if I was a Real Religious People.  Wait a second that's how I'd feel if I was ANYONE.  I'd Have Been Better Off Staying In Bed Too Even If I Was Me!  What else is going on.  Midway through eighth paragraph.  You'd think that'd mean I only have 1.5 paragraphs left.  Wrong.  2.5!  I dunno hopefully you wouldn't think 1.5 and WOULD think 2.5.  Because it's actually pretty simple math.  Maybe I'm giving you too much Negative Credit re: How Stupid you may or may not be.  Hmm I've given someone a lot to think about presumably or something.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Also they're risking Angering God because the main premise of Shabbat is You Can't Do Any Work.  And just GOING to Synagogue is work!  Walking.  Probably DRIVING.  Look obviously they make a point of saying fine if it's gettin' ya to Temple FINE but BE CAREFUL.  But either way I forget exactly what point I was trying to make.  What else is going on.  I was originally aiming for Diet Relaxation at the start of December (and or RIGHT AFTER THE END OF NOVEMBER).  But I probably could start even sooner! But it wouldn't align cleanly with a Month-by-Month Calendar Measurement so WHY BOTHER.  Hmm.  Already more than halfway through October.  Getting close to flipping the page of Patriotism Calendar.  OH NO I'm running out of calendar.  ANY Calendar.  Well it was fun while it lasted I guess.  Yep.
Last paragraph for now!  I don't believe it.  Sure I do.  Interesting counter-point.  Maybe my best option is starting Game Change In Diet at the end of October/beginning of November!  I could theoretically do that responsibly but it just feels too soon to me!  Wonderful.  This is good stuff.  Maybe a fortnight into November.  Shakespeare would be okay with that as a standard measurement of time.  And I try to live my life by standards Shakespeare would OK.  If you know a better way to live your life I'd like to hear it.  Well not right now.  Send me an e-mail or something that I can read at my own pace.  And if I don't get back to you for weeks or months that's just the price of doing business.  Huh.  I was just trying to think hmm what are some weird things Mr. Freeze said in Batman & Robin.  First thing that immediately came to mind was What Killed The Dinosaurs?  THE ICE AGE!!!  Which is an interesting thing to say because wait a second that's not true at all.  That's a COMPLETE disregard for Actual History.  Anyway I'm gonna take a walk be back soon.




That Sums That Up

    Hello friends.  Time to write some paragraphs.  Then I get to take a Nice Cleansing Experience To Remember!  What else is going on.  Any good Films I can watch today.  I'm a big Cinema Fan I like all the movies.  Horror movies.  Non-horror movies.  Horror TV shows.  All the things.  Baseball game today at a reasonable time!  I've lost interest in baseball.  As normal people get gradually more into and into baseball as playoffs narrow down I go the other direction!  YEAH I SAW THIS IN THE LAST SERIES WHAT ELSE YA GOT.  I'd be interested in some Spring Training Games.  You tell me you're canceling the rest of the playoffs but starting Spring Training I'd be excited about that!  Well I guess that's not too crazy.  Everyone plays in Spring Training.  Including the team, The Metropolitans, that I'm most invested in.  I dunno even if it was 29 teams in Spring Training, with The Mets on the outside looking in, I'd STILL be rooting for Sprang Training.  Get off my back about it is the point!
     Huh.  I just like picturing Economy Sized And Decorated Baseball Fields.  Get some teams working out on a nice Little League Baseball Field.  And it's Spring.  Hmm maybe this is a weather thing.  I'd rather it be March and October.  I dunno March IS the October of The Summer.  I mean.. uh...  NO.  They're opposites.  March is the After Winter equivalent of October being the Before Winter equivalent.  Or reverse that and say it's around Summer.  I THINK I'VE MADE MY POINT CLEARLY.  No I don't.  I've never been more sure of anything in my life!  That I haven't made my point clearly at all!  Oh well that's life I guess.  Now that I think about it it was a pretty dumb point in the first place.  Oh well THAT'S life I guess.  I'm amending what I Say Life Is.  Updating it one might say!  Anyway.  Let me put it this way.  Braves are facing the Dodgers in playoffs.  If they were facing each other as the inaugural Spring Training Game of the Spring Training Season I'd be more interested in watching that.  Get Off My Back About It Is The Point!
Wonderful.  I enjoyed a shower yesterday.  I'm gonna enjoy a bath today!  It's calling mixing things up and it's what life is all about.  Especially for Mixologists.  Which is either some sort of fancy bartender, some sort of dumb D.J., and/or the people in charge Of Soda Company's R & D.  Hmm third thing wasn't so different than the first thing.  Oh well that's life I guess!  I feel like there was a guy named Tom Mix.  And he was either an Old Timey Actor or an Old Timey Baseball Player.  Leaning towards Actor.  Because I Know For Sure That's The Case.  They mentioned him at the end of Tombstone: The Western.  And I pay attention to The End Of Things.  Except for baseball.  Then I pay attention to the beginning of things.  But for Films I pay attention to the end!  What else is going on.  Got some carbonated beverages going on for Act II.  About halfway through my third glass of carbonated beverage this act.  WHOW A GLASS A PHARAGRAPH.  Yep that math seems to check out more or less.  On average.  Decent Estimation at least.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I saw Diet Coke was trending on Twitter.  Haven't they heard The Good News About Coke Zero?!?!  Maybe they have.  That's what's trending.  A bunch of people saying Hey I thought Die Coke was good BUT that was before I tried Coke Zero.  That sort of thing.  I'd click the Hyperlink which shows me what people are saying about it but I really don't care at all.  Their business!  Not mine!  Also I don't wanna read about Die Coke at all anyway.  Who needs it?  Not me!  HMM baseball game time today is just a bit unreasonable.  Starts at 7:37.5 PM.  Baseball games are three hours.  I'm in bed and turning off TV and Going To Sleep at around 10:20, 10:30.  Sorry Baseball looks like you will be going unwatched.  By me at least.  That's Gotta Smart.  I don't think it's fair that when the Braves beat the Dodgers last night, not only did the Braves get the win, but the Dodgers got the loss!  That sounds like you're accidentally repeating yourself to make things even worse for the losing team.  You might wanna look into that math I think you're getting it wrong!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  What else is going on.  Oh No year is ending soon.  What do I got in store for the next year.  Let's start off small.  What do I have in store for The Winter.  THAT'S NOT SMALL THAT'S OVER 2 AND A HALF MONTHS.  Then let's start with January.  OKAY THAT'S SIGNIFICANTLY SMALL ENOUGH I GUESS.  YOU'RE PUSHING IT BUT IT'S CLOSE ENOUGH TO BEING SMALL ENOUGH.  Anyway hmm.  Gotta do something.  The good news is I have 2 and a half months to Think About It.  Gotta imagine at some point something will occur to me!  And I'd be like how the Hell did I miss that.  Of COURSE I should do that in January and/or the complete amount of the over 2.5 months left of winter in Beginning Of 2022.  Wonderful.  If you make posts which combine Trending Topics on twitter into a single tweet I assume you go straight to the front of the line and are featured when people click the links.  No matter how few followers you have! Hmm sounds like good strategy.  Either way I'm gonna take a bath now.  Great!  WAIT one more thing.  I happened to look up weather 11364 just out of interest and I was looking at the hourly forecast and it had a bunch of Partly Sunny and then it was interrupted by an hour of Partly Cloudy.  WHAT THE HELL.  IT'S THE SAME THING.  I'd, "Delve," into that a bit more but I got Cleansing Activities to do!  Be back soon.




I Have A Good Feeling About This

    Hey!  What's going on.  Got some nice Coke Zero going on.  Gotta be honest, I've gotten Coke Zero the last 2 or 3 Super Market Deliveries and I'm thinking ya know what I haven't had in a while?  DIET PEPSI.  In the sense that I'd like that.  So I got that going for me is the point.  When kids have fun at places where you pour your own soda into Cups and mix sodas does anyone ever mix pepsi and coke?  My guess?  NO NEVER.  VERY RARE YOU COULD GET BOTH IN THE SAME SODA DISPENSER.  They either have Pepsi Products or Coke Products!  I feel I HAVE seen Rows Of Soda Product Faucets where they had Pepsi and Coke.  It rings a bell.  Once in a blue moon.  But for the most part that's gonna be an impossibility.  Here's something that's common-- probably even more common than mixing flavors-- mixing Diet and Regular Something.  I think it's dumb but who am I to judge.  Some guy with judging powers.  Oh Right that checks out. 
  Got coffee.  Re-upped with soda.  Life is going fine.  Hmm I have pretty low standards for Having A Fine Life.  Alright!  That's good news.  Gonna take a walk after the entry.  No break!  I got the same amount of time I often have for a break but I just feel like taking a walk anyway!  I got MUSIC to listen to.  Hey I know these songs.  Now I Know Them Yet Again!  Fine Life!  I'm gonna be honest, Michael J Fox and/or Michael J Fox's Character was alive for the duration of Back To The Future IV but he wasn't exactly on his, "A," Game either.  Which is okay.  If he wants to be on his, "C," game that's his choice!  Let's be honest it was more of a D+ game.  Why am I reluctant to be honest about it.  It Was A Dream I Had.  It doesn't reflect poorly on the real Michael J Fox at all.  Well maybe A LITTLE BIT.  But Not MUCH.
Third paragraph of the Act III!  Wonderful.  Possible I change up diet halfway through November.  Makes sense not-arbitrarily-fitting-it-into-patriotism-months-wise.  So I got that going for me.  I'm doing an experiment to see how much Coffee Mate: The Fat Free Coffee Creamer I use.  The experiment was noting when I started the most recent Bottle of it and taking note of when I finish it.  Very complicated experiment!  Only the best at science (me) could figure this out and do a compete Lab Report on it.  What's the experiment.  What's my hypothesis.  What's the materials.  What's the process.  ETC.  So many standard steps in lab report!  I know it because I had to take Two Lab Classes TWICE!  The first time around I didn't finish my labs!  Anyway.  I had to take 2 classes twice I think.  I know I had to do summer school for one.  Chemistry.  Then I feel I had to repeat Physics but that was during regular Fall or Spring Semester.  WOW I must be great at science now.  Well I just accurately parroted the first half dozen steps of your standard lab report.  So I guess I absorbed Something.
What else is going on.  My favorite step is Hypothesis.  Now it's time for My Creative Self To Shine!  I CAN HYPOTHESIZE ANYTHING I WANT.  ...Better just hypothesize accurately what I know logically will happen.  This way I look like a real genius when it comes true.  Hey this is the penultimate paragraph of the entry!  Wonderful.  When I retook Chemistry in the summer it was both Chemistry I and Chemistry II combined.  With each one normally being its own semester.  I think when I re-took physics I was able to just take Physics II for one semester.  THIS IS GOOD STUFF lets keep it going.  I dunno.  Worst part about Labs was having a partner.  Everyone partners off with their friend.  I have no friend!  Then someone gets stuck with me.  Which is super bad because I'm weird AND I'm bad at labs and don't know what to do.  Doubly bad for THEM, Double bad for ME.  No one is winning in this scenario!  Maybe the teacher!  He or She gets off on this kind of stuff!  Huh?
Last paragraph of the day.  I guess.  I think I also took a Spanish Class that was beneath me but I don't think it was a repetition of a class.  I was just taking it with sophomores when I was a junior.  Somehow.  Not sure how that worked out.  The point is I Forget.  I'm almost done with the entry.  That is A point.  I guess.  I have the whole day ahead of me!  Except for the over 50% of the day that already happened.  And the last 3/24ths of the day where I'm asleep.  But basically I have 40% or so of the day ahead of me!  WOW that rounds up to 50%.  Which rounds up to Everything!  Amazing.  Gotta get blood work done on Thursday.  More like I GET to have blood work done.  I'm gonna insist they take MORE blood.  Just keep taking blood until I pass out.  Hmm that sounds Kind Of Fun I guess.  Anyway I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:40 P.M.




Saturday, October 16, 2021

Hey You're Alright

    Hello friends.  Woke up a little late today.  Also had to do a Surprise Chore and bring in laundry to laundromat.  I GOTTA CARRY A BAG INTO A CAR?  AND THEN SLIGHTLY LATER TAKE THE BAG BACK OUT OF THE CAR?  AND THEN DO IT BACKWARDS AGAIN A FEW HOURS LATER???  I don't remember signing up for this life.  Doesn't seem fair it should be sprung on me at the last minute!  Hmm.  I HOPE this isn't the last minute.  Even if it's relatively speaking and A Week and not A  Minute.  Then again I can accomplish a lot of Buckets in the last week.  Off the top of my head eat pizza.  I could do that even if I wasn't dying.  I probably wouldn't though, got stuff in the fridge from Super Market I should eat first.  But if I was dying screw that I'm getting pizza!  So that's one way to Live Your Death.  My Mom was nagging me to help her set up Second Cousin's Bar Mitzvah Live Stream.  I did it! You know how?  I opened the e-mail.  I CLICKED the hyperlink.  THE END.  You thought I was angry about the laundry?  I'm ANGRY MORE about having to click a hyperlink for my Mom.  Okay time to cool down.  You'd think so wouldn't you.
     Anyway.  Saturday Time.  Besides Condensed Upcoming Few Hours Schedule which is tight, and then Laundromat In Reverse, today should be a fine day!  I'm awake now and all the bad stuff is behind me!  Except for those things I just said that are Before Me!   I don't wanna see my second cousin turn 13.  He's probably significantly taller than me by now.  I got enough problems than having my little cousins be much taller than me.  Anyway.  On the plus side Laundromat Lady recognizes me and this is only my third time there.  Even said did you get a haircut?  Yes!  Yes I did!  All in all this person is more or less my best friend outside my immediate family.  It's not GOOD that's the case but it is FACTUAL.  Hmm shouldn't my Various Doctors be closer friends?  Nope!  They're Work Friends!  Laundromat Lady is my Friend Friend.  Hmm.  That seems to imply that Me Going To Doctors is My Job.  More or less!  Definitely Mental Health Doctors!  If I didn't go to them I probably wouldn't get Social Security from the government.  So without them I don't get paid.  WORK FRIENDS.
Anyway.  What else is going on.  I feel my Endocrinologist is also a Work Friend too.  Prove me wrong!  I have big news.  The Lemon Flavored Vitamin Water Zero isn't called ENERGY it's called SQUEEZED.  Where did I get Energy from.  What's Energy.  Looks like Energy might be a NON ZERO flavor.  That can't be right either.  I remember Drinking Energy.  I can't imagine myself ever drinking Caloried Vitamin Water.  Oh well that's life.  Anyway it's a good thing it wasn't Energy because I drank it at night at my nightstand while going to sleep.  I don't want energy then!  That's the last thing I want!  I want SQUEEZING.  Hmm I wouldn't mind some Squeezing In Bed if you know what I mean.  Sex.  Sex involving Squeezing!  Hmm sounds good let's do that tonight.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  Creeping up to Coffee Time!
     I think Vitamin Water Flavor Names really lean into being Uppers.  Energy Rise Refresh etc.  I want some flavors that will SLOW YA DOWN A BIT.  We got plenty flavors to get us going.  We need a few to get us going IN REVERSE.  Sounds fair.  What else is going on.  Maybe the XXX flavor is a nighttime flavor.  Sure.  Hmm.  Always imagined they were leaning into Sounds Like Sex but maybe they're leaning into sounds like whiskey jugs during the 19th century.  In which case Sign Me Up!  What else.  I've mixed Vitamin Water and Alcohol probably 5-10 times in my life!  I can definitely remember doing it at some point.  Good sense memory or something.  It's delicious because of Water and it's healthy because of alcohol.  Sounds about right!  Not sure I ever had a workfriend.  I had Work for 1 or 1 and a half years!  I had 1 friend but we were friends before work job started so he's not a work friend.  I had 1 or 2 other people I talked to but I don't think they liked me much!  Great.  Having Work IN AND OF ITSELF is your friend.  Great.
I took a gander at Bar Mitzvah Swearing In.  It was okay because it was a Wide Shot and not an up-close shot of Cousin.  So they weren't rubbing it in that he's taller than me.  Fair enough.  LOOK some beverages I've had non-diet versions of.  But by the time Vitamin Waters came around (first year or college or so?  For ME at least?) I was 100% diet Beverages.  For the most part!  So NOT 100% you're saying.  No.  I'm sticking with 100%.  I drank 100% diet beverages FOR THE MOST PART.  What's so hard about that to understand and/or accept?  Anyway.  Watched Tombstone yesterday.  It's not quite Deadwood but it's also not quite Some Dumb Western I Don't Like At All.  My favorite part about Westerns is those nice looking cigar-cigarettes Western People smoke sometimes.  That just looks appealing!  I'd smoke those if they were marijuana and not tobacco.  Also it has to be LIGHT marijuana.  DIET marijuana per say.  Hey here comes coffee. 
     I think they're wearing masks on Synagogue Live Feed.  WHAT WOULD GOD SAY.  I dunno!  Maybe he'd be Pro-Mask, maybe he'd be Con-Mask.  That depends on a congregation-by-congregation determination.  MY God would be PRO MASK.  That's how I feel.  On account of wanting people to live, etc.  Makes sense.  Hmm.  Covid Mask pun with The Mask the movie.  Ya put on your covid mask and then go SOMEBODY STOP ME!!!  That's the line everyone knows The Mask says, right?  SOMEBODY STOP ME.  That's his famous quote.  I haven't seen the Mask in 20 years.  I feel like it would be horrifying now.  I just looked at a still image and I'm gonna have trouble falling asleep tonight!  Maybe because I'm drinking too much Vitamin Water with Pop.  Hmm.  I just watched 10 seconds of a mini-scene of Jim Carrey As The Mask getting ready for a date in a Hyper And Funny way.  Part of it is him shaving himself.  He's wearing a mask.  What, is he gonna be growing facial hair on top of the mask?  THIS MAKES NO SENSE.  Also the other ways to get ready make sense.  Brushing his teeth!  Makes sense!  Blowdrying his hair?  Makes sense!  HE DOESN'T NEED TO SHAVE HIMSELF OVER HIS MASK.
Now I'm angry again!  I was getting over me being frustrated for many reasons to start the day.  Now I'm back being upset!  Oh well that's life.  Then again if anyone can grow facial hair on top of a mask it's The Mask.  He can do a lot of things that most people can't do.  I can see him growing a beard in a matter of SECONDS on top of his mask.  Ugh.  I feel like Tombstone is some sort of Pizza reference.  Is that a kind of pizza?  It may be a Chain of Pizza or a Chain of Frozen Pizza.  Or maybe it's a way to cook pizza.  Either way Tombstone is a word sometimes associated with pizza!  Wow now I'm on board.  I'd watch a film about pizza.  Hmm.  I probably HAVE watched films about pizza.  Off the top of my head I'm not sure what they were called though.  I'm imagining a movie where there's rival Pizzas or something.  That's all I got.
     Eighth paragraph!
  I got that going for me is the point.  I heard some audio from the next room of Cousin reading Hebrew.  Or RECITING HEBREW FROM MEMORY.  Either way sounds kinda dumb.  He may be taller than me at this point but he's gotta dumb Early Teenager Voice.  So basically I'm still better than him which is a relief.  I got 20 years on him!  I SHOULD be better than him and I shouldn't feel bad about feeling that way!  Wait a second he was born when I was 20?  I HAD HIM WHEN I WAS 20?  THAT'S VERY EARLY.  Wait a second I didn't have him.  Well I kinda did.  It takes a village!  Ugh.  Hey what else is going on.  I'd live in a village.  In a heartbeat!  You set me up with a village right now I'll live there IMMEDIATELY.  Hmm there's a Queens Village.  That's no village.  That's a city-suburb Neighborhood.  HEAVY on the city and LIGHT on the suburb most likely.  Either way That's No Village!  Huh.
Penultimate paragraph of the act!  So I got that going for me.  Presumably.  There's a The Village: The Not So Great M Night Shaymalan Film.  Presumably.  I've never seen it so I can't say for certain if it was Not So Great.  Honestly, I can't even say for certain whether there's a Film in the first place!  Pretty much operating on what I've heard from other people!  Either way I know the ending so that's halfway there to being able to appreciate the film or not.  YEAH.  Damnit SFS!  Now you know There Is An Ending.  You coulda guessed that.  It's not a constant Live Stream Film that never stops.  Not like his Bar Mitzvah.  This is live stream and we're watching it life.  For all we know this Never Ends!  The point is I can't wait to see the surprise twist ending to this Bar Mitzvah.  Well I can wait.  Also I'm not even watching it!  I'll have to ask my Mom later how it ended.  Ugh.
Last paragraph of the act!  Then I get to take some sort of Great Walk.  The point is Pizza is a Plot Point is many a Film.   But I can't think of a film ABOUT pizza.  Oh Right The Pizza Film.  That's what it called.  That Pizza Film.  Wonderful.  Well I'm not proud of it but I'm gonna take the plunge and google Films About Pizza.  Here we go!  Mystic Pizza.  I never saw that!  Also I don't think it's about pizza.  Pizza is more The Setting.  Either way probably as close as we're gonna get.  What else is going on.  Seemed like there was a nice baseball game last night.  I envy those who watched it.  No I don't.  I PITY them.  They could have been watching The Simpsons for the first 2/3rds like I was and then been asleep for the last 1/3rd like I was.  I was VERY happy with how that turned out and I think they'd have preferred it too!  OH WELL.  Too late to go back now!  But it's NOT too late to use that knowledge to plan appropriately for Future Nights.  Ugh.  I'll be back in a little bit!




Don't Take My Word For It

    Hey!  Time to write some more.  I'm in a GOOD mood now.  I got to move A BOX.  There was a box behind Our Car I noticed on walk.  MOVED THAT SUCKER TO THE SIDE.  Fun And Productive!  Put it on the grass and not out in the street.  Hopefully it gets the message and stays there.  If there's enough wind it may blow out into the street again.  But that's not my problem anymore!  It is if it blows out specifically behind Our Car.  Not my problem!  My Dad's problem!  His Car His Problem!  Anyway what else is going on.  More or less on Reasonable Schedule today.  My walks take slightly less time than 6 months ago on account of walking faster on account of weighing less and being more used to walking.  Entry Writing takes less time on account of... weighing less?... and being more used to... walking?  The point is Great Everything Takes Less Time.
     So I got that going for me.  I assume no one was watching us watch Synagogue Live Feed.  Other than God.  But he doesn't need a Counter-Live Feed to watch us.  He can do it from The Clouds Where He Lives.  Anyway.  William Shatner made it Past God.  God doesn't live in space.  He lives in the clouds!  Everyone knows this.  Except for Mormons.  But they're just being difficult.  What else is going on.  Anyway all things being equal I'd rather live Underground than In The Sky.  More fun!  I think God should switch places with The Devil is the point.  Live in some nice underground bunker for Heaven.  It'd be more fun than it sounds!  Also It Already Sounds Fun.  And now I'm saying it'll be MORE FUN?  This great news keeps getting better and better!  What news.  Heaven switching place with Hell news.  Oh Right, That News.  Also if you're from America and you go to Hell and then you keep digging eventually you reach Australia?  That'd be my guess. 
     Third paragraph of the act.  And all I had to do was be Comfortable Typing And Sharing Bullshit.  Alright!  I assume if you're in Hell you get a break maybe one day a week.  Where you get to have a generally decent and comfortable time.  Ya gotta have SOME sort of relief every now and then, right?  That's what I'm counting on at least.  Ugh.  Getting close to the time where I will cut Diet In Half.  Go halfway between Current Diet To Lose Weight and what I project will be Ultimate Diet To Maintain weight.  We're talkin a matter of weeks!  Amazing.  Everything is a matter of weeks.  Ten years is a matter of 520 weeks.  WOW I CALCULATED HOW MANY WEEKS ARE IN 10 YEARS LIKE IT WAS NOTHIN'?!?!  GENIUS.  Also half a day is a matter of 1/14th weeks.  See everything just like I said.  Things that aren't measurements of time though are NOT matters of weeks.  Though!  Maybe somehow I could figure out how that might work.  But I don't want to right now!  I want to do it LATER.  I'll update you TOMORROW.  First instinct is make some pun with Matter of Weaks or something.  I'll mull that one over.
Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Any other homophobe for Week.  Sure I know words.  Maybe you're the one who doesn't know words.  Week.  Weak.  All I could think of off the top of my head!  What else.  Been a while since I took a shower.  I think I may take a shower today!  And I'm not jus speaking ERRONEOUSLY.  Or such that I will probably change my mind later when the time comes.  I think I will actually shower!  Great just great.  I haven't been to a Family Celebration Party since I was a teenager.  I was invited to Cousin Bar Mitzvah Party!  I might have gone if not for Pandemic Semi Quarantine!  GREAT JUST GREAT.  I COULD HAVE BEEN EATING HOR DOURVES TOMORROW AND NOW I'M STUCK NOT... EATING HOUR DERVES...  What a jip!  I could look up how to spell Hor Dourves correctly.  I DID look it up.  But then I lost interest while reading the right way to do it and was like eh I'll just stick with what I went with originally.  Go figure!
     Last paragraph of the act!  I could have gotten Hor Dourves from Super Market.  It's just not the same!  Wonderful.  What else is going on and crap.  Oops almost forgot to Italicize the Super in Super Market.  That may be the one thing I've been consistent about for the last year.  Not sure why!  Was it EVER an explicit joke somehow.  Such that it seemed funny or clever to do it.  Or have I just been doing it 3 times a day for a year without explaining or understanding why.  I think that's it.  Oh well that's life I guess.  OH RIGHT.  Because I wanted to emphasize this market is SUPER.  Now it's all coming back to me.  The point is what else is going on.  I get to take a shower VERY soon.  It's gonna be a blast and a half.  Oh that reminds me have to Twist The Shower Knob to adjust Shower Stream Settings to, "Blast & A Half," mode.  That was important to say!  It got me to the end of the paragraph just as I suspected it might!  Be back soon.   




I See What I Did There

    When diet is cut in twine I will have LEGITIMATE BREAKFASTS as well as Slightly More Snack.  Sounds good to me.  That's why I went ahead and typed it here.  I already knew it but just saying it again gave me a good feeling!  What else is going on.  Gonna take a nice mid-sized break between Entry and Next Walk.  Probably roughly half an hour!  Wow I don't believe it.  I can accomplish Looking Forward To Late Afternoon MLB Game Today.  I can watch that game like it was nothin'!  Then again If It Is Like Nothin' maybe I'd rather watch something else.  I don't wanna watch Nothin'!  I'd rather watch Somethin'!  That's my official position FOR NOW.  Maybe FOR LATER.  Definitely for THE IMMEDIATE FUTURE.  The Immediate Future is kind of an oxy-moron right.  Maybe I'm the oxy-moron!  Interesting counter-point. 
    Hey!  Got coffee going on.  That will last me roughly into the end of the fourth of five paragraphs this entry.  Wonderful!  I've been alerted it's UNLIKELY that Film Subject Billy Beane will come to The Mets.  GREAT JUST GREAT.  We're gonna have to settle for someone who has barely been referenced in Major Motion Pictures at all.  The point is I might have changed my mind on how to root for in Major League Baseball American League Championship Series To Remember Until A Few Days Later When Major League Baseball World Series Starts.  I just kinda don't like The Red Sox!  Astros I might dislike slightly less!  Amazing.  Look you've got Red Socks we get it.  Quit bragging!  No one likes a braggart!  Maybe other braggarts!  Because they can relate to each other!  Huh.  I will not be having pizza today BUT for lunch I can have, without giving TOO much away, something Reminiscent of Pizza in SEVERAL ingredients.  That's all I'm saying!  Leave the rest to our collective imagination!  Not really my imagination!  I know for sure!
     Anyway.  The main similarity is IT CAN BE MICROWAVE'D.  JUST LIKE PIZZA.  Well it's one of the main similarities at least.  Ugh.  Let's move on.  Microwave.  That's when you wave at someone with Only The Wrist And Up.  Funny.  Great stuff.  Where do I come up with this stuff.  Mostly from The Wrist Up.  ACCURATE.  I'm not thinking this.  I'm just coming up with it in my hands (mostly fingers).  So I got that going for me.  Hmm does that mean I'm Actively Not Thinking At All Right Now?  Partly!  Uh oh My Brain Doesn't Know What To Do During These Sentences.  That ain't good!  Got rid of one of my old sweatshirt jackets.  I don't have a problem with it but it has some sort of chalky type chalk on the back of it which I guess was a deal breaker for my Mom.  Not sure what it was.  Couldn't be chalk.  I didn't have this jacket in high school.  MAY have had it in Queens College.  But chalk RARELY came into play there.  Maybe some rooms HAD chalk board but I never used 'em!  Not like in high school.  You gotta use chalkboards all the time!  Write out your Math Results for Homework and whatnot.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Wonderful.  Who was the guy who first came up with snapping a piece of chalk in two and then suddenly there's two pieces of chalk.  At some point SOMEONE must have been the first.  I envy them.  What else is going on.  HMM what's the ranking of the four Major League Baseball Teams Left In The Playoffs SOLELY on the abbreviation they have.  For clarity let's go through them-- Boston Red Sox is BOS.  Houston Astros is HOU.  Los Angeles Angels is LAD.  And Atlanta Braves is ATL.  4) BOS 3) LAD 2) HOU 1) ATL.  I feel this isn't really up for debate.  Maybe the reason I like ATL is because it was a movie.  And I'm a big fan of Cinema.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  I just finished coffee.  EXACTLY when I said I would.  MAYBE a single sentence earlier.  Very close though is the point.  What else do I got going on.  Should there be more uniform ways to abbreviate teams?  BOS and HOU are just the first three letters of Team Location.  LAD is abbreviation of Location --> Team Name.  ATL is just letters of the name of the location chosen for Strategy And Style.  No.  We don't need a Standard Way.  I LIKE that each team has some wiggle room with how they wanna abbreviate.
     Last paragraph!  I don't believe it.  I get to do Stuff Or Somethin' over the course of the upcoming day.  And presumably my life!  I feel tomorrow I will still get to do stuff for the most part.  Amazing.  Hmm.  Maybe play some Rocksmith today.  That'd be vaguely productive.  I've made musics in the past and maybe I want to one day in the future.  This way I will be slightly better at doing that one would imagine.  Maybe slightly worse.  Can't discount that possibility completely.  The point is this little cousin never came to MY Bar Mitzvah why should I come to HIS.  One of my only memories from my Bar Mitzvah involved my other of 2 cousins who isn't the one whose the father of this Little Cousin.  I was leaving the party before everyone else was gone to hang out with my friends somewhere else and he was like don't do anything I would do!  And it annoyed me.  A) We're not friends I don't know what you would do!  B) I'm just going to hang out okay I'm not gonna do anything special  C) Look I feel guilty enough about leaving the party already let's just leave it at that and go our separate ways quietly and respectfully.  And that's how I transitioned From Boy To Man.  Wonderful.  I've talked about this Cousin Interaction before.  I'm not sure why.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-1:14 P.M.





Friday, October 15, 2021

Let's Have Collective Good Time

    Hi friends.  Gotta write another entry right now.  It's what I did yesterday Thus it's what I have to do today!  I can't be doing new things Todays compared to Yesterdays.  I'd get confused!  Also you can be doing the most unproductive things possible (like this!) but if you do the same thing every day I feels like you're doing something important.  You're keeping on schedule!  That's A Job Well Done!  Anyway.  Will be accepting Super market delivery today.  Possibly before Act I is finished!  AMAZING.  I finished my soda before taking my first walk.  Gotta go 1-3 hours without soda!  Hmm.  Sometimes I forget It's Only Me who drinks so much soda all the time.  Kinda feels like a universal experience to me because of how ingrained it is in my life.  As far as I know you never drink soda.  Maybe once a week.  Oh well that's your problem not mine.  If anything it's GOOD for me.  More soda for me!  SUCKERS!
     Then again if no one is buying soda they'll stop making it.  They're not gonna make soda just for me.  They should but they won't!  Hmm.  What other kind of Non-Product 19 Products should they be making just for me.  How about DIFFERENT AND NEW FLAVORS of SODA.  Yep that sounds about right.  I'd suck on some Candy Canes.  They make candy canes for everyone.  Thanks a lot.  Super market was out of Diet Lemon Snapple so I got Diet VITAMIN WATERS instead.  WOW WATER?  VITAMINS?  Those are LITERALLY the two healthiest things you can drink in one.  Also the vitamin flavor I got was Lemon.  High in Vitamin Lemon.  Watched a nice Subtitled Shutter The Screaming Service movie yesterday.  Spooky!  I like covering halfway between my eyes and the screen when I just KNOW a Fright is coming.  I don't close my eyes.  I wanna see SOME of what's going on.  I cover my eyes with my hand about a half a foot out.  Not totally covering my head but blocking part of my eyeline.  I get THE GIST of what's going on without seeing The Real Spookiness Shock Picture.  It's called STRATEGY.
Anyway.  I like that Stephen King book turned into movie turned into TV Mini Series The Gist.  Wait a second.  No I Don't.  Oh well you get the point.  Just once I'd like to see Stephen King write a novelization of a movie.  It ought to go both ways!  Also it'd be SPOOKY.  Why is Stephen King doing this it seems strange and vaguely beneath him.  Scary to consider what exactly is going on in this situation!  Huh.  They should have Challenges where an author challenges another author to re-write the same book the original author wrote.  Huh.  Not sure what that accomplishes.  Either the thing I described OR me describing the thing in the first place.  Neither really accomplishes much!  Major League Baseball game was decided last night.  The Dodgers beat the Giants!  Well good for them what a great end to a season.  WHAT?  THEY NEED TO WIN EIGHT MOE GAMES O BE CHAMPION?  That's A LOT of games.  People think oh 2 series and each series they can lose a bunch of games and still win.  Nope!  They MUST win eight and exactly eight games.  GOOD LUCK WITH THAT.  You IDIOTS.
     Cool.  The Team I root for has won ZERO games this post season.  Not 100% sure they won a single game since August to be honest.  I think I'd remember something like that!  August and Honest are a slant rhyme AT LEAST.  Let's talk about it!  We just did.  Fair Enough!  My Mom made coffee again today.  Pretty sure this time I really won't have enough for 2nd cup.  Gonna have to make more this time around.  You heard it here first.  I hope so.  If you heard it somewhere else first That Scares Me I Don't Like The Implications Of That.  BEST CASE scenario is my Mom has a blog and updated you on this.  I don't like that much but it's MUCH better than any other possibilities.  Feel like I've said 80% of this entry before.  And 80% of that is dumb and pointless.  You know what that means!  There's SOME AMOUNT of things that are okay.  Lemme think on that math for a while.  NAH NEVER MIND.  I'd have to come up with other figures and variables to use in the equations beyond those two 80%'s and I got better things to do one would imagine!
     Yeah!  Gonna be accepting super market delivery and putting stuff away myself.  My Dad is taking my Mom to get her EYEGLASSES.  WOW she can choose any style she wants.  We're talking PLASTIC.  We're talking METAL.  I THINK THAT'S IT.  Pretty sure you can get covid from eye to eye contact.  You put your eye right up in someone's finger or anything else Covid DEFINITELY can get through your tear ducts.  That's probably THE MAIN way people get it to be honest.  So does that mean if you keep your eyes closed around town you won't get covid.  Yes that's exactly what it means.  And you can take that to the bank!  Not sure why you'd want to!  But you can if you feel like it!  Said that before.  I think it's interesting that if I'm repeating myself it's more likely o be DUMB AND POINTLESS than GOOD AN DWORTHWHILE.  That's why it keeps occurring to me.  Because it's dumb and I'm not thinking hard enough.  If I'm actually Thinking and Trying To Do Good then something new would naturally come to me!  Hey that's life oh well great jus great. 
Nothing is worse to me than knowing I'm repeating myself (except for knowing I'm repeating myself AND knowing that it's worthless anyway) but maybe you don't really mind.  For me I get the Sense Memory of the last time I said whatever I'm repeating.  I can't place exactly when I said it or how close it was exactly but I can FEEL the repetition in my bones.  Maybe for you it barely even occurs to you.  That's the dream, right?  Repeating yourself with absolutely no consequences (legal or otherwise).  Hmm great.  Got coffee going on.  Wonderful!  Hmm.  Dodgers.  Wondered 5 or 7 times on the website what that name is all about.  NEW THING IDEA-- maybe they were originally a Dodge Ball Team?  Only thing I can think of where Dodging makes sense.  This was BEFORE Vietnam so no one had ever thought about Dodging Drafts before.  Hmm.  Gotta imagine people dodged the draft in every war ever before then.  CONSCRIPTION wars at least.  We just chose NOT TO GLAMORIZE IT like Hollywood did in the 1960's.  THOSE ASSHOLES.
Wonderful.  Gotta imagine Hollywood is rooting for Los Angeles Dodgers.  Hollywood lives in Los Angeles!  Per my understanding.  When the next military draft comes along is it possible I could apply to be in The Space Force.  Gotta imagine at SOME point Space Force will become a legitimate wing of Military Military Complex.  Either now or later.  That sums that up.  Also I feel being very short would be an ASSET in space.  I can move around the rocket ship EASIERLY.  Then again I got mental problems that means they wouldn't put me in Army Army or Other Wings Army.  ALRIGHT finally this is paying off IN DIVIDENDS.  Not sure what Dividend means.  Some sort of portmanteau of Divide and End.  Off the top of my head that sounds about right.  Gotta imagine Portmanteau is a Portmanteau of Port, Man, and.. Toe?  Gotta imagine I said that roughly ONCE before.  Amazing. 
     Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Can't take my next walk until after Super Market delivery comes.  That's part of life I guess.  The MAIN part.  Ugh.  Who was the first Obese Person In Space.  I feel like I dunno what William Shatner looks like but he could be Sneaky Obese.  Lots of old people are Sneaky Obese.  Unhealthy and don't care but jus wear very wide fitting shirts so we're none the wiser.  The point is We Must Send Obese People Into Space so hey can check scales Not On Earth and see they weigh less and then have a Pizza Party once they get back to Earth. F irst Pizza in space.  I'd eat the first pizza in space once it came down to Earth and someone delivered it to my house.  Assuming it's not contaminated with Space Mold or something.  The point is I Like Pizza!  Pizza is a portmanteau of Pee and Zuh.  Amazing.
Penultimate paragraph of the act.  First mentally ill person in space.  SEVERELY mentally ill.  Gotta be someone.  That sounds dangerous.  They might try to take over space because they're not operating at 100% Mentally.  And then where would be!  Suddenly this jerk is in charge of space and there's very little we can do about it!  What else is going on.  Pretty sure even in Air Force they preferred shorter people.  Presumably because that's just That Much Less Plane you need to make.  Just make is 91% of the normal size for everything in the plane.  Keep everything proportional to the pilot!  Makes sense.  Maybe I should write a pilot for a TV show.  Makes sense.  I guess.  Anagram of Pilot Lipitor.  Lipotor is a cholesterol medication.  What's going on again.  I feel like I'm on the generic for lipitor.  Either that or Lipotor.  The brand name is Lipitor but the generic is Lipotor.  You'd think so wouldn't you.  What do you mean you wouldn't.  What are you an idiot or something?
Yeah!  Super market delivery just came!  Which is good that I can take a walk whenever I want when this is over.  But it's BAD because I had a lot of time to think while putting stuff away about how worthless this entry has been so far.  Very frustrating!  Luckily it takes 10-15 minutes to put stuff away.  So that didn't last too long!  Uh oh I have the entire rest of the day to be upset about Quality Of Entry.  AND THIS PARAGRAPH ISN'T HELPING.  I'm just digging myself deeper into something.  I wanna say some sort of hole.  Off the top of my head that's what people dig.  Except for Courtney Love's band.  People don't dig that Hole.  Maybe they do.  I've never heard a Courtney Love song.  Gotta imagine there's music and possibly vocals.  Better LTURQ at some point.  Maybe Hole is good.  What do I know.  I just assumed it was bad.  Possibly because of Misogyny!  Anyway great I'm gonna take a walk now!




I Don't Have Problem With That

    Wonderful.  Back here to write some more.  The good news is It's Not Great but It Takes Up Time.  For me at least!  I assume if you read this it tangibly kills some of your time!  So we got that going for us is the point.  What's the point of life other than killing time.  Hmm TWENTY other things?  I feel like maybe the 21st most important thing in life is killing time.  Not a bad showing all in all but for most people there's plenty of other things to prioritize!  Oh well.  Gotta remember to make coffee after this act and before cleansing experience.  So I have it ready to drink for the last 4 paragraph of act iii!  Sure great what else.  Enjoying this new sweatshirt jacket!  It bunches up in the belly in a strange and weird way but it kind of looks okay from the outside and feels okay from the inside.  Wow Strange AND Weird?  Anyway Only I Know it's a Strange And Weird Bunching which isn't so bad.  I don't mind being the only one who knows about World Problems.  I'll take that responsibility! 
     Sure.  I've been getting into a habit of having a Breakfast From The Griddle meal roughly once every two days.  Which is roughly once every four meals.  Not including Microbreakfasts of those meals!  Anyway it's delicious and presumably I'm eating reasonable portions and what more do you want from me.  Get off my back about it!  Hmm anything I'm not thinking From The Griddle I might like.  Pancakes Waffles and Freedom Toast!  That's all I can think of.  What about A DIFFERENT KIND of Freedom Toast.  That's the same thing you idiot.  Hmm.  Gotta imagine there's SOME other way to make a Breakfast Centric Griddle Meal that I and/or They aren't thinking of!  I dunno.  I don't think there is.  I guess now I know what I want to accomplish in life.  Set into motion Them Thinking Of Another Breakfast Centric Sweetish Meal.  I can't think of it MYSELF.  But maybe I can raise funds for someone else to figure it out.  I'm GREAT at raising funds.  Presumably.  I've never done it before.  And I'd probably be bad at it.  But if you don't take those two things into consideration I'm GREAT.
     Yeah!  What else is going on.  Probably more important and/or interesting stuff.  That'd be my guess off the top of my head.  Hey there's a Major League Baseball game going on tonight.  Starting at 8:07.5 P.M.?  Well that does me no good.  My bed time will be around the 7th inning.  Pointless to even start watching it!  Forget the 7th inning stretch I'm doing a 7th inning Go Home And Go To Bed and Read About Last Inning and A Half in the newspaper the next day.  That's how I roll!  LOOK I can get other breakfasts that aren't From The Griddle.  Omelet for example!  Those are good too but Different Very Different.  Hmm I should be getting those too though.  Maybe a Steak and/or Eggs.  Delicious!  Breakfast Burrito.  Just the sound of those words get me off a little bit!  Hmm.  Maybe keep that kind of thing to myself.  Look I didn't get this far in life Keeping Things To Myself.  I got this far in life by Keeping Nothing To Myself.  Kind of not in a great place in life all in all so maybe I've been doing things wrong!  But I ain't changing course now!  Pot committed at this point to Whatever I've Been Doing I Forget!
Wonderful.  Getting closer to finishing act.  Then taking cleansing experience.  Then writing a paragraph.  THEN IT'S TIME TO DRINK COFFEE.  Gotta have things to look forward to in life.  Right now it's next cup of coffee!  Get off my back about it, etc.  Been a while since I had a non-regular-coffee coffee.  Last thing may have been Dumb Supermarket Cold Coffee halfway through 2020.  Not iced coffee!  No ice!  Just somewhat cold.  Anyway no ESPRESSO or CAPPUCCINO or COFFEE COOLATTA.  Hey Coolata I just got it.  Like a COOL LATTE.  It's a pormatantou!  Also Coffee means Coffee Flavored.  I already had figured that out implicitly if not explicitly.  Sure I know what implicit means.  I know it implicitly.  THAT'S what it means dumby.  Cool Latte.  Kinda always implicitly thought it mean This is A LOTTA COOL. No I didn't.  Well whatever I thought it was CLOSER to Lotta Cool than Cool Latte.  Fair Enough!
     One more paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it.  Sure I do.  That's more accurate I guess.  What else is going on.  One huge benefit of getting Internet Super Market Delivery instead of going to Local Super Market and DIY is that when you get soda from Internet Delivery it's COLD.  They keep it cool in their truck somehow (Refrigeration?).  When you get it locally it's not refrigerated in supermarket let alone in Our Transportation Car.  Would take HOURS if not DAYS to cool up in our fridge.  This New Way COLD RIGHT AWAY WONDERFUL.  Probably talked about that before.  On account of how important it is to my life.  Makes sense.  They don't HAVE to refrigerate 2 liter bottles of soda but they do it anyway!  They go the extra mile!  Except not literally!  If they were going the extra mile they'd be 20 blocks away from my house and Lotta Good That Does Me!  NOTTA LOTTA.  That sort of thing.  Hey I'll be back in a little bit. 




This May Or May Not Be It

    Hello friends.  Cleansed myself!  Took a bath.  Not sure why I was keeping that close to the vest.  I feel like if I'm not telling you explicitly what I'm having for meals I should also forego telling you what kind of cleansing experience I have.  Also have I been telling you implicitly my meals?  My guess?  For the most part?  Not really!  The Breakfastcentric talk was halfway there but for the most part I'm good about keeping my promise of not going into details of lunch and dinner but especially lunch.  I'd talk about dinner, too, sure, but it's the LUNCH that was the problem area.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  Parents aren't back yet!  One can only hope it's because my Mom is Really Putting The Time In to pick a pair of glasses she's happy with.  I wish her all the happiness in the world.  Well maybe 20% of the happiness in the world.  Also 20% for my dad and for my brother separately.  And I get 40%.  That sounds JUST and FAIR.  Hmm probably should leave over 10% happiness for Everyone Else.  That's coming out of My Brother's Happiness!!!  Here come coffee.
     Ya know what?  Take the 10% out of my happiness!  I'm down to 30% but that's still way more than enough.  I actually get a tangible Jolt Of Pride from saying that.  HEY I'M A GREAT GUY TAKING 10% OF TOTAL HAPPINESS OUT OF MY HAPPINESS.  I should be proud of myself!  Because I'm an IDIOT.  Started drinking coffee part ii.  Amazing!  Not 100% sure what to watch what takes place In The Television Set today but I think a movie or two from Shutter The Screaming Service is one way to go.  Maybe an In English one.  That's the language I speak!  Easy to understand!  I've been understanding this language my entire life so it should be pretty easy all in all.  Anyway.  Should have gotten a different flavor of Vitamin Waters.  I got a pack of six Normal Travel Sized ones.  ENERGY.  Lemon.  That's probably my #1 standard from back in the day.  But I SHOULD have gone with ESSENTIAL.  Orange.  Either way I'm covered on those flavors in SODA.  I got orange and Sprite (Lemon/Lime).  Ugh.  The point is it's eating me up inside and there's absolutely nothing I can do about it!
     Sure.  Great.  I dunno!  What other flavor should I have gotten other than Energy or Essential.  I remember getting the XXX flavor a lot because a lot of places have 1 or 2 Zero Calorie flavors at most and that was a standard.  And I always felt bad about getting it.  Not because it's pornography but because I didn't anticipate liking the flavor no matter how many times I had it and it was good enough.  Anyway let's see what else I could have gotten from the Super Market Website.  Hmm.  Could have gotten PINK flavor.  "Shine."  Strawberry Lemonade type concoction.  I've gotten that before sure.  But I don't like how it's a little too feminine for my tastes.  Leave the pink beverages to the ladies!  I'm all about ORANGE or.. Lemon...?  What color is lemon flavor.  Not yellow!  Hmm.  Neon.  That can't be right, Any Color can be Neon.  Neon isn't a color it's a way color can be.  I dunno I feel like Neon is also A Color In And Of Itself.  What else is going on.
     Penultimate paragraph!  Ne-On is the name of someone in some sort of Eastern Asian language.  Sounds about right.  I'm not being racially insensitive because I'm not JUDGING.  I'm not saying its good one way or the other!  That's for you to decide.  What else is going on.  I think if you say Asian, people assume you mean Eastern Asian.  But I'm being SUPER not racially insensitive by being EXPLICIT about it.  You thought something IMPLICITLY?  I'm gonna show you the error of your ways and now we all know for in the future we must be EXPLICIT.  Huh.  Lost track of what I was talking about.  Which is probably a good thing.  Not 100% sure what I was talking about but relatively sure It Wasn't Great.  Anyway.  What's non-Eastern Asian.  MONGOLIA.  That shuttem up.  Hey after the next sentence after this one roughly I only have to write one more paragraph!  That sentence I was talking about in the last sentence is this sentence.
Wonderful.  I like watching recent horror movies from across the globe because I'm always impressed by the conditions people live in across the globe.  Hey they got nice towns there too.  Some nice buildings and technology.  Good food and clothes.  Everyone seems to be living decently in these Horror Movies.  UNTIL the Horror Starts.  But before then Hey Great I'm Happy For Them.  I was worried all other people lived in squalor!  Anyway probably gonna take a pretty nicely decent sized break between Entry and Next Walk.  Hmm.  Maybe it's because 90% of these horror films are found footage films.  So obviously if you're in a story where Characters and/or Fake Documentary Crews Can Afford Cameras the REST of the lives of the people involved will be decent enough.  I've given myself a lot to think about.  Wait no I haven't.  THEY gave me a lot to think about.  I'll get to that at some point one would imagine.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:17 P.M.




Thursday, October 14, 2021

This Will Entertain Me

    What's going on Friends.  My Mom made coffee this morning before I could.  TERRIBLE.  She probably made slightly Not Enough.  Maybe enough for me to have 1.66 cups of coffee.  I WANT 2.0 CUPS OF COFFEE.  Now I gotta finish this coffee and then either not drink enough coffee or make a tiny amount of bonus coffee?  WHAT THE HELL IS HER PROBLEM.  Other than wanting coffee for herself before I could make it.  Which it turns out isn't a problem because she solved the problem for herself.  But now it's my problem and that hardly seems fair!  I could just pretend this Coffee Making never happened.  Pour it all out and start from scratch.  What am I A SOCIOPATH?  That's a lot of coffee to waste!  Terrible idea YOU IDIOT.  Anyway I feel like I might take a look at New Sweatshirt Jacket today.  It's been long enough!  Now's the time To Look At Things!
     Wonderful.  I hope it looks good (1) but is comfortable (2).  And (3) is appropriately warming while in cool weather.  And (4) Exists.  If it turns out not to exist that's a deal breaker I'm never gonna wear it even once!  Deal breaker.  More like a WIND BREAKER.  Isn't that what they call similar jackets sometimes?  Also it's what you call Someone Who Farts.  Maybe you haven't been calling them that but you can certainly start now.  Gotta imagine there are people out there who never fart.  I envy them.  I was thinking because there's something wrong with their body that they don't produce farts.  But maybe they're just 100% on the ball and resist the urge to fart whenever it comes.  Sounds dangerous.  You hold in every fart at some point that triggers some kind of physiological consequence, right?  It must!  I think we all disproportionately fart when no one else is around.  More than the body would do all things being equal!  Based on personal choices we make.  We hold it in around other people and then alone we go nuts.  So instead of it being even, we're just never farting around people and always farting alone.  This isn't a complicated observation.  But an important one!  So that's something to think about.
     Watched The Chucky TV series!  Good stuff!  I had a blast and THREE FIFTHS.  Amazing.  I don't like how the main characters look like and act like they're in high school but are actually in middle school.  Confusing!  They seem like they're in ninth grade but it's only eighth?  This isn't realistic at all NEXT.  I don't wanna see what's Next.  It's either this or we move to something else entirely.  The point is Good Stuff!  Also Chucky is a good guy.  He helps out his new Friend To The End in a genuine way.  Spoiler Alert!  Maybe he turns out to be motivated by self interest but for now it looks like they're gonna be good friends.   Spoiler Alert!  We need a phrase for Spoiler Alert for when it's already been spoiling and you're alerting the recipient of your spoiler that you recognize there was some spoiling going on.  Something simple.  Maybe just SFS!!!  Sorry For Spoiling.  Something along those lines.
You'd think if I was really sorry I'd just go back and not do it.  Well I guess that's a big clue I'm Not Really Sorry!  Thems the breaks!  Jackets are called Wind Breakers because they give you a break from the wind.  Without the jacket you're gonna be Winded On A Lot.  Wearing the jacket though?  You'll be like WHAT WIND I FEEL NO WIND.  GETTING A NICE BREAK FROM IT BECAUSE OF THIS GREAT JACKET.  That sort of thing.  Have I written anything yet this entry?  All I can remember is making the astute observation that people tend to save farting for themselves.  Astute more like ASS TOOT.  There that's something.  Right?  Ugh.  Also watched episode 1 of Day Of Them Dead.  Okay!  Didn't think I'd like it based on the commercials but it was solidly Fine!  No talk about Farting in Day Of Them Dead.  Does come up in Chucky though.  Hmm.  Does Chucky Fart?  Gotta imagine I dunno.  Never seen him shit or piss or eat or drink.  Still though that means nothing re: Him Farting.
Fifth paragraph!  Coffee after this paragraph!  This coffee at least will be all the coffee I'm after.  Seen Chucky have sex.  And not just dry humping.  He created a child so there was somethin going on there.  How can you produce sperm without eating or drinking.  Everyone knows sperm comes from eating and drinking.  Where else would it come from?  Huh.  I normally don't like using the word or concept Farting but I feel if I say it as often as I have been this entry it loses all its power.  Which is what we should strive for re: Using This Word.  Sure great.  Some guy in Norway is killing people with a bow and arrow?  I Disagree!  He's killing people with arrows.  He uses the bow to get the arrow into them.  But it's decidedly the arrow that's killing them.  I dunno.  You say people die from Gun Violence.  Not bullet violence.  That suggests the opposite of what I was saying.  FINE he's killing people with BOWS NOT with arrows is that an okay observation?  I don't think so.  Great everything I say is wrong!  Well not everything.  Only Most Things.
They had a Friday The 13th Marathon yesterday.  Because it was Wednesday the 13th.  Look at this rate you're gonna have to have Friday The 13th Marathons 5 times a month.  Once for every 13th and once for every Friday.  This franchise is gonna LOSE ALL MEANING at this rate.  Also before this rate.  Meant very little from the getgo!  Teenagers shouldn't have sex while children who can't swim drown.  I got that much out of it at least.  And if they do they will get killed by the mother of the kid who drowned later on.  Sorry For Spoiling!  Also when it's Supernatural Jason who starts killing people what's his problem.  Clearly he's not totally dead.  Just brush himself off and move on with his life.  Also was Jason a regular kid before Drowning or some kind of Special Needs kid.  I get the sense he needed some Extra Attention as a child.  What else is going.  On!  Poured myself coffee.  If my Mom is done with her coffee for the day I think I DO have enough for a full 2nd cup later on.  YEAH.  YEAH!
     Seventh paragraph.
  I don't believe it.  Nice exciting baseball game today tonight.  TOO late for me.  I'd have gotten a blast and a tenth out of watching it in the afternoon or so but 9:07 PM is way past my bedtime.  Well, before my bed time.  But half the game is legitimately past my bed time!  Unless they wrap the game up in 20 minutes.  Which they might!  Keep it simple that's what I say.  What would happen if two teams decided to make a pact to just stop playing after five innings.  What could be done?  The umpires would just have to deal with it!  Maybe give Both Teams a loss in the standings.  That sounds like a reasonable way to deal with these troublemakers.  Anyway what else is going on.  Halfway into October.  Pretty much!  Not exactly but we're into the Period Of Several Days which is halfway through.  Wonderful.  AMAZING.  Trick Or Treaters coming up!  I feel like in Red States they will insist their children go trick or treating and insist they don't wear any costume because that's how anti-mask they are.  NOPE YOU AIN'T WEARING THE SCREAM FILM SERIES GHOSTFACE MASK PEOPLE MIGHT GE THE WRONG IDEA AND THINK YOU'RE DOING IT FOR SAFETY.  YOU'RE GONNA GO AROUND TOWN MASKLESS OR ELSE I'M CUTTING OFF YOUR ALLOWANCE.  Hey great they're getting an allowance in this situation!  I want an allowance. WHERE'S MY ALLOWANCE.
Whatever.  CAN we be wearing Ghostface Masks for safety?  Gotta imagine it would help A LITTLE bit!  Better than nothing is the point.  ALSO YOU CAN'T COME HOME UNTIL YOU HAVE COVID.  That's the Red State Adult talking to his poor kid again.  You could tell because it's in capital letters and italics!  Just like in previous paragraph.  Hey great how about that.  Did the Romans invent Italics.  Italics rings of Italy to me.  And The Romans were Italy.  I dunno.  I can't imagine Roman Numerals in Italics! Wait yes I can.  So that settles that I guess.  There was a kid in my high school whose name was Roman.  Dumb Looking Kid!  That's all I remember.  Can't picture him exactly but I remember at the time just thinking poor kid looks like some sort of dumb looking kid.  Not Special Needs dumb.  Just Jerk Dumb.  Wonderful just wonderful.
     I feel like as I get older my definition of jerk has changed.  Along with my definition of asshole.  And they've both changed in the same direction!  Jerk and asshole used to mean someone who antagonizes people and whatnot.  NOW they mean some sort of Chump.  I feel like my first impressions on who are jerks and assholes is more ACCURATE but it's more FUN to use those words to mean Some Sort Of Chump.  Wonderful.  Ninth paragraph.  I guess.  How many people over the last year and a half went out of their way to get covid.  And I
don't mean went out of their way to endure circumstances which might give them covid.  I mean literally just kept doing dangerous things until they got covid because that was their goal.  A hundred?  A thousand?  Those would be my first two Logarithm Guesses.  Those are logs right.  Something with exponents of 10 or something?  I don't have all the details in front of me which is clear because what I am saying makes little sense already.
     Last paragraph of the act!  And all I had to do was Not Say Anything Worthwhile.  Yeah!   Maybe I should load up Blitzkrieg Bop on Rocksmith and don't play the first 2/3rds of the song and then start playing only the last 1/3rd.  That way I can get the hang of playing that last third correctly!  Hmm that sounds interesting except for the fact that I'm assuming the last third is the exact same thing as the first two thirds.  So I wouldn't really be getting that much out of it!  Wonderful.  I like songs that don't change over time. Easy to listen to and get!  Oh this portion of the song is the same thing repeated from the first part.  I'm not confused at all over this!  Makes sense to me!  Wonderful.  Happened to be up to the Twilight Zone episode of William Shatner seeing Monster on the side of the plane.  Which makes me realize that people forgot about that reference to make while talking about him going up in rocket ship.  He could have seen monster on the side of the rocket ship!  I brought that up to my Dad and he said William Shatner himself made that reference when talking about his Recent Space Experience.  Yeah but I DIDN'T SEE THAT you idiot.  So when it came to me it was brand new!  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.   




What A Productive Day

    Hey!  Tried on my new sweatshirt jacket.  Good stuff!  A material of jacket I never had before!  Feel like it's a WARMTH Material which means I may be able to wear this jacket for the next month OR EVEN FIVE WEEKS.  WOW!  Also this isn' a sweatshirt jacket.  Just a jacket!  I'm not sure it doubles as a sweatshirt at all.  Not so far off from Sweatshirt but whatever.  Sweatshirt doesn't sound appealing.  I don't want a shirt that makes me sweat!  I don't have AXE BODY SPRAY as of now and if I'm sweating that will turn off all the beautiful ladies I come into contact with.  That and EVERYTHING ELSE about me.  Oh well that's part of life.  Not impressing Imaginary ladies!  Thems the breaks.  Started watching the Christ Rock Saw Movie last night.  Only 10 minutes left!  But I decided I was too tired to finis hit last night and went to sleep.  This ten minutes will be A HASSLE AND A HALF having to keep my eyes open.  That was the decision I made and I stand by it!
     Great paragraph.  I liked the part where it ended.  Amazing.  Also I kind if liked the part where it ended the least. Because it really drove the point home to me this paragraph was completely worthless.  Before it ended there was hope I could turn things around a little bit!  Now all hope is gone.  GREAT.  Successfully got enough soda his week to last me the entire week more or less.  GREAT.  And this time I MEAN IT.  Hmm what's a good anagram of Great.  Gear't.  Everyone knows what GEAR means.  I'm just adding a 'T!  Yep that makes sense.  I feel like GEAR has a slang meaning.  "Cool," or something.  HEY BRO THAT'S GEAR.  That sort of thing.  And if not yet now's the time to start using that.  It sounds about right, doesn't it?  What else is going on.  Now that I think about it I feel like there's an over 50% chance Gear was used in Mod-Talk.  In The 1960's Britain.  Solid More Likely Than Not on that one.  Oh well that's life.
Yeah!  Not only do I got enough soda for the week I've got a fair amount of snapple for the next 24 hours, too!  Wow SNAPPLE?  That's HEALTHY.  Juice!  Doesn't get healthier than juice!  Sure it does.  Most juice is probably unhealthy.  Lots of sugar.  Either way I'm happy with my Snapple Supply so get off my back about it!  I think Ringo Starr even says Gear! in The Simpsons.  I'd LTURQ but some things are better left to the imagination.  HOWEVER The Beatles didn't call people BRO.  So the sentence HEY BRO THAT'S GEAR hasn't been done yet up until Me Right Now.  So I'm performing a public service somehow is the point!  Amazing.  Might have to wait 10 or 15 minutes after Act II before Cleansing Exercise.  Dad wants me to listen for Doorbell up to a point.  I'm okay with that!  Not a big difference.  Think of all I could accomplish in 10 or 15 minutes!  Masturbate.  Off the top of my head.  That's about the right amount of time for that.
How dare you think about judging me!  For either Masturbating In General or for How Long I'm Implying I Masturbate For One Masturbation At A Time.  Or even for just Talking About Masturbating.  The point is There's Lots You Can Judge Me For Here but you'd be wrong to do so ON ALL COUNTS.  So get off my back about it is the point!  What kind of stuff do I have to look forward to for the rest of the day.  I dunno!  That's fun.  I get to be SURPRISED.  I dunno.  I'm kind of All Ready And Set for the inevitable Not Much Going On.  Won't catch me by surprise that much at all!  But the good news is.. uh.. I was pretty sure there was Some Good News here somewhere.  Lemme think about that and I'll get back to you.  No I Won't.  I might.  Yeah it's possible I gue
ss.  Wonderful!  Lots of STRIKES going on.  I feel somewhat guilty for crossing the picket line and writing this entry.  I should be striking myself.  Not sure how that would work exactly.  Not sure about a lot these days!
Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I think Big Businesses should COUNTER STRIKE.  Unless the workers accept Big Business's terms and conditions FACTORY IS CLOSING DOWN NO WORK FOR ANYONE TODAY.  That'll show the workers who means business!  Business means business!  That's where they get the name from in the first place!  It's possible I don't understand how economics work.  VERY possible.  Anyway.  Maybe start wearing new sweatshirt jacket as soon as Next Walk.  VERY possible.  What else is going on.  Looks like I'll have only 5 minutes to kill before being able to take Cleansing Activity.  Hmm.  What can be done in five minutes.  When I was in high school we had 5 minutes between classes.  Get from one side of the building on the 3rd floor to the other side on the 9th floor.  You need all that 5 minutes!  Also once every two weeks or so there were Shorter Schedules and they made up for it partly by making it only 4 minutes between class.  The point I think I was trying to make was in upcoming 5 minutes I can get from one classroom to another in high school.  Not sure how that helps me now!  Not sure about a lot of things these days!  Be back soon. 




Getting Closer To The Next Entry

    Hey!  Finished Seeing The Saw Movie with free time.  Amazing.  I like the part where hey this movie is halfway good enough.  Then again it's also halfway no good enough.  Gotta look at the Film as Half Full.  Don't tell me how I gotta look at films!  Anyway what else is going on.  Looks like there's a good movie or two on the Shutter: The Screaming Service to watch today.  I think that'll be the thing I do directly after entry is over!  For 15-60 minutes!  Then take a walk!  THEN WATCH MORE.  Then walk more.  THEN WATCH MORE.  Then do that over and over until it's time to start the next entry.  Amazing!  Walking?  Watching?  Talk about A Great Life.  Oh right that's the third thing.  Talking About A Great Life!  That's kind of what entries are, right?  I never thought of my life as Great but ya know what?  Kinda Good Life lately!  That's what entries are about too INDIRECTLY.  It's the SUBTEXT.  Amazing.
Coffee time!  The worst thing about life is The World.  I'm worried about it and whatnot!  Too many things that can go wrong.  Too few things that can go right!  Oh well that's life what can ya do.  Work hard in your own way to make the world a better place.  Yeah but what can ya do That's EASIER.  Nothing.  GREAT THEN IT'S SETTLED.  What else is going on.  Solidly have enough coffee to my liking for today!  Entire 2 cups and even some left over!  I LIKE it when there's a little bit left over that no one drinks.  It makes the world a better place that I'm wasting resources.  Coffee is a recourse, right?  And if it isn't it USES UP resources to produce and distribute!  Either way I feel like it's fun to waste things for fun!  Huh.  No I Don't.  EXCEPT IN THIS ONE INSTANCE.  Wasting Coffee Instance.  What's going on again? 
     Third paragraph of the act.  I feel like when you're doing The Oregon Trail one thing you can have supplies of is Coffee.  Not sure what that does tangibly to help you make your way across The Oregon Trail.  It must benefit your wagon party somehow.  Something in the algorithm where having more coffee helps you tangibly.  Otherwise why get it!  So the point is I forget.  Are there Oregon Trailheads who do the Oregon Trail every year in wagons.  My guess?  Probably not!  Maybe there should be though.  Ever think about that?  No I can say I've never thought about that.  Until Just Now.  When I Thought About It.  Wonderful.  I feel like some of these Shutter Movies may be in subtitles.  Which is okay 89% of the time but when I'm eating Meal and Watching TV it's not ideal.  I can't Look At My Meal AND Look At The Subtitles at the same time.  I need to HEAR dialogue.  I'm gonna wanna stare down my meal while I'm eating it!  Huh.
Penultimate paragraph.  One strike going on is at Kellogg's and I can only hope one result of the strike is that they start making Product 19 again.  Solid 68% chance they made Product 19.  Better LTURQ. YEP IT WAS KELLOGG'S.  Man oh man can someone get me in touch with Strike Leader?  They CAN demand for Product 19 if they wanted to.  It'd be kind of tangential to their main goals but WHY NOT.  Let's sneak that in there as one of the terms and conditions.  Why Am I Feeling 81% serious in my head about this.  It's a joke.  No question!  But in my head I'm Taking Myself Seriously.  Oh well that's life.  "We're not making products one through eighteen until you guarantee a product 19!"  That's how that might go.  Wonderful.  Anyway jeez what else is going on.  WALT WEISS is being discussed as potential Manager for Mets.  I like it!  A) Name Alliteration.  B) Recognize him from following baseball in 1990's.  C) What more do you need???
Last paragraph.  In Breaking Bad Walter White was originally named Walt Weiss but they had to change it because of This Guy.  Also Walt Whitman was originally named Walt Weiss but they had to change it because of This Guy.  Well great that got us maybe 1/5h or 6th into the paragraph.  I'm happy with that result!  It may not have been pretty ON THE ROAD to that but in the end it was worth it!  Also upon further introspection it's a solid 1/3rd or 1/4th into the paragraph!  If we include the last few sentences too!  Which we should be!  Also at THIS point it's MORE THAN HALFWAY into the paragraph.  This just keeps getting better and better!  Hmm what else is going on.  That's about it!  Looking forward to wearing New Jacket!  That's where my life is at.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-1:05 P.M.




Wednesday, October 13, 2021

Can I Interest You In Some This

    Hello friends!  A new day is upon us.  Well, me at least.  You may be stuck in yesterday!  In which case I wish you the best.  Lots of fun you can have with that!  I don't get why Bill Murray is so annoyed for most of Ground Hog Day.  This is an amazing deal!  So much fun you can have!  He discovers this halfway through the movie but only as a device to become a better person later on.  Becoming a better person is NOT FOR ME.  I'd just have fun living the same day and exploiting that for fun purposes for the rest of my life.  Because that's the kind of guy I am!  Hmm what kind of fun am I imagining.  Off the top of my head when he repeatedly tricks women into sleeping with him.  Oh right that sure.  It's not date rape because they never find out they were tricked!  Also is Tricking Women like Bill Murray did In Film sort of date rape?  It's not all out rape!  But certainly not all out innocent either.  Let's talk about it.
     Got Chucky TV show lined up to watch today.  I can't wait to see what happens.  My guess?  Talking Doll!  Off the top of my head that's what I'm expecting.  I'd like to see Chucky play the field more.  I know he's into Jennifer Tilly and/or the character Jennifer Tilly plays and/or The Real Jennifer Tilly.  But I think he could be more of a lothario.  Anyway.  Just looked up definition of lothario.  That's Bill Murray in Groundhog's Day alright!  Well, for 20 minutes.  For most of the movie he's a decent enough guy.  You can't expect guys to be perfect all the time, though!  Everyone gets 20 minutes to be a complete jerk in life.  Hmm.  Is that a REAL 20 minutes out of our entire lifespan.  Or is that an equivalent amount of, if our lives were 2 hour long movies, that 20 minutes would take up in the movie.  So in other words we get 1/6th of our lives to be complete jerks.  Hmm.  Given myself a lot to think about. I HOPE we can be complete jerks 1/6th of our lives.  That's what I was already aiming for anyway!
     What else is going on.  No baseball game today!  Great.  Just great!  I tried playing some Rocksmith yesterday.  Blitzkrieg Bop is a little too fast for me!  I can get 2/3rds into the song playing it just about right but then I start to lose Power and can't hit all them power chords quickly enough.  My hands get tired!  This is a long song!  Oh well practice makes slightly better than before presumably.  Albright time for a Major League Baseball Playoff Update!  WHO do I root for in 2 upcoming series.  MY PICKS are Red Sox over Astros and Whoever Wins Between Los Angeles and San Francisco over Atlanta.  In the American League I describe the teams by their team name and in the National League I describe them by the city they're based in.  This is an important distinction to make!  Also these picks are for who to root for, not necessarily who will win.  Then again sure maybe those are the teams that will win I wouldn't put it past them.  Did I write anything important this paragraph?  Oh right.  Team names in one league and cities in the other league.  LOL.
I'm satisfied!  What else is going on.  Been a while since I Said LOL.  Even longer since I said LMAO.  And it's been a VERY VERY long time since I said ROFL.  But now I got all those bases covered so its time to move on with our lives.  It's important we reply LOL to jokes on the internet.  How else would the original person know we recognize that it's supposed to be amusing?  They might think we're taking them seriously.  Sure great what else is going on.  Can't remember the last time someone said LOL to me.  To be fair I can't remember the last time I communicated with someone over the internet.  Possibly 2011.  That sounds about right.  But also to be fair I probably wasn't on top of my game in 2011.  Might have been 2007 when I got my last Lol.  The point is I'm looking forward to the future!  Not backwards to the past!  Or sideways to the present!  Whatever.  Billy Beane MAY be in the cards for Mets GM or Guy In Charge of GM.  HE WAS PORTRAYED IN A MAJOR MOTION PICTURE.  Let's get this done!  I'm excited and a half if he's GM or In Charge of GM.
     Whatever.  I read Moneyball: The Book back in the day!  Pretty sure.  90% sure I remember reading it.  And 80% sure I did read it!  Sounds about right.  I saw the movie too but that's no accomplishment.  Any average Joe can see a movie.  It takes a special kind of Joe who can successfully read a book.  ME.  THAT KIND OF JOE.  Speaking of JOE I get coffee after this paragraph.  JOE means coffee.  Maybe spelled JO.  Hmm better LTURQ and WHY that's the case.  It was called, "Joe," because it was considered a Common Man's drink.  Score one for the common man!  I know in history Common Men sometimes got it rough but if they got coffee it can't be all bad!  It can be MOSTLY bad.  But not all!  Anyway.  Billy BEANE?  LIKE COFFEE BEANS?  OH MY.  Ugh.  Gotta imagine I've written 1 and 1/3rds worth of worthwhile things so far.  YEAH.
My goal is to reach 3 worthwhile things by the end of the act.  I'm a little bit behind pace for that but I think I can make it!  I see there's a new limited edition Meat Protein for Chipotle.  I'd be interested in trying it but it's 200 times the amount of calories as the previous meat proteins.  ALSO the burrito bowls are 500 times the amount of calories I thought they were by checking the nutritional info on the website because they probably are giving bigger portions than they advertise.  So best to steer clear of all that together.  Is that anything.  A sixth of a worthwhile?  A TWELVTH?  NO?  NOTHING?  Damn!  What else is going on.  I thought I had a third of a chocolate chip pancake left over for breakfast today.  Nowhere to be found. Boy I sure hope I miscalculated and didn't eat it in my sleep at some point.  Unless I ate it my sleep and really enjoyed it and got something out of it.  Which I didn't.  Because I'd remember something like that!
     Seventh paragraph!  Unbelievable.  Does Billy Beane ever feel pressure to do some other great notable stuff so there can be a Moneyball II?  My guess?  YES IT CONSUMES HIS EVERY WAKING MOMENT.  At least he's not consuming things in his sleep.  Like pancakes!  Unless he gets something out of it.  Which he won't.  He'd remember something like that!  Huh.  Gotta be weird to be played by Brad Pitt: A Universally Celebrated As Attractive Person.  Because then you're in real life looking like just some jerk.  Oh well live and learn.  Then again you were also played by Text In A Book.  And you're definitely more handsome than THAT.  Than what.  Being in a book?  YEAH.  Sure that makes sense why not.  On the one hand this entry is flying by but on the other hand TERRIBLE.  Oh well LOTS of time to correct course.  Let's start next paragraph.  I've already given up on this one!
     YEAH.  Anyone still use AIM: THE AOL INSTANT MESSENGER OFFSHOOT?  Let's talk about things and LOL at each other.  Even if neither one of us says anything funny!  We'll make a PACT to be encouraging to one another.  Ugh.  In the past sometimes I would think of phrases and think hey that'd be a good song title.  Nowadays I think of phrases and think hey that'd be a good poker username.  Which is odd because I don't play poker at all anymore.  Still though!  First instinct is gotta use this phrase to be a good poker username.  It'll throw all the other players off their game!  So I got that going for me.  I can't write songs I can barely play the first 2/3rds of Blitzkrieg Bop.  Anyway.  I'd play some real money poker.  Except for the technical difficulty of getting money on and potentially getting it off Poker Client.  And getting my parents to be on board with it.  And having to play poker itself.  But without all of those things I'd LOVE to play some poker.
     I guess.  Ninth paragraph!  Still haven't looked at new sweatshirt jacket yet.  Maybe not until Spring!  If it's on the lighter side of possible material it may be too late in the year to wear it!  Oh well that's life.  Ordering jackets too late in the year.  What's wrong with that.  Means I'm WAY ahead of the game for next spring.  Gotta look at Jacket as Half Full!  Then again just having the jacket lay around for five months it might break or something.  Lose its effectiveness?  I dunno!  Older Adults aren't supposed to take aspirin every day for some reason anymore for some reason?  I don't like the sound of that!  Or I Do.  Maybe I DO like the sound of that.  I feel very strongly about it one way or the other is the point.  Not sure which way but I'm HEAVILY invested in this.  Not sure who I'm rooting for in Final Game of San Francisco versus Los Angeles.  I'm fairly ambivalent either way!  Wow ambivalent?  That's the best quality someone cam be!  It's the OPPOSITE of how I feel about Aspirin News.  Maybe not THE opposite.  It is AN opposite but not THE opposite.  Huh.
Last paragraph of the act!  That's good.  I've always dreamt of getting to do something else after this paragraph!  Wonderful.  I'd tell you the latest Poker Names I thought of but then you'd have extra time to adjust to those names.  Best keep them close to the vest from now.  I don't have a vest.  I've never had a vest.  Maybe it's about time I get a vest!  Okay I'll look into that I guess.  How come Superman's Son is gay and everyone is saying Superman is Gay.  Superman's Son isn't Superman.  He's Superson!  Either way get off his back.  If you don't like it root for some other super hero.  Problem solved!  Also he's bisexual it appears!  So just root for him when he likes ladies and not when he likes fellas.  Easy!  Hmm.  Maybe my problem is that Superson shouldn't be interested in sex at all.  First of all he's half alien.  Second of all he should be busy Saving People And Whatnot.  Third of all that's about it.  I'll be back in a little bit.




There's Plenty Website To Go Around

    Well hello there friends.  Time to write some more paragraphs!  I'm guessing 80% chance I miscalculated thirds of pancakes yesterday and 20% chance I ate a third of a pancake by accident at some point.  Great.  We've all moved on from that story.  Clearly WE ALL HAVEN'T.  All includes me!  And it's still eating me up inside!  Anyway what else is going on.  What do I got in store for today.  NO BASEBALL.  That's a positive step in the right direction re: What I Got In Store For Days.  Not really a step in the right direction.  Baseball games resume tomorrow.  If it is a step in the right direction then tomorrow is a 2 step backwards in the opposite direction.  Uh oh 2 steps backwards?  At this rate I'm gonna trip over myself pretty quickly.  And then I'd look The Fool.  Whatever.  I think if Billy Beane becomes GM and makes a great trade for The Mets the headline the next day should be Billy BEEN'E DOIN' GREAT!  Just one idea. 
     How come Billy isn't capitalized.  Costs money to capitalize letter.  Are YOU gonna shell out that money for each paper printed?  Hmm.  I would guess capital letters on average are slightly more ink than lower case letters.  I would guess that in a game show type setting hoping to win 32,000 dollars.  Huh.  If Superman and Lois Lane are married does that mean Lois Lane now knows who Superman is?  Also is it technically Lois Land and Clark Kent are married?  When Lois Lane goes around town with her husband is it Superman or Clark Kent that people are getting.  I could look into this but why bother when I can just speculate and then stop caring enough before I come to an answer.  Must be Clark Kent.  Is she was married to Super Man they'd be like how did you meet?  Oh at the paper?  WHEN YOU WERE CLARK KENT?!?!  THE JIG IS UP WE FIGURED OUT WHO YOU ARE YOU JERK.  Something along those lines. 
     Anyway.  What's the worst that could happen if we knew Superman was Clark Kent.  Nothing!  If anything Clark Kent would just get treated with A LOT more respect.  That's the only consequence I can think of!  What else is going on.  Hmm.  Not a lot of people named Clark these days.  Possibly not a lot of people named Clark ANY days?  Okay that was a snooze.  TRUE but a snooze.  What about a Clark Bar.  The exception that proves the rule.  Also what the Hell is a Clark Bar.  It's possible they haven't made Clark Bars since the 1950's.  Better LTURQ.  Peanut Butter and Taffy.  Well that sounds disgusting.  What else is going on.  Hmm.  If Clark Kent gets treated with more respect because people know he's Superman, would Superman get treated with SLIGHTLY less respect because they know he's Clark Kent?  Hey I knew Clark Kent and he was a jerk.  Now I think Superman is a jerk too.  It goes both ways is the point!  Just like Superson.
Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Does Superman still live in the 1940's.  I feel like Superman originally lived in the 1940's.  Possibly because he debuted in the 1940's.  I can't imagine a Superman living and working in the world of today.  Oh well what can ya do.  If I thought I was free of errant head hair around my body yesterday before bathing, I'm REALLY sure of it now!  So I got that going for me.  Anyway I think you SHOULD clog your drain with a little bit of hair each day.  That way it GETS USED to it. So if you ever clog it with too much one day it'll know how to handle it!  Why.  Why did I have to say that.  I thought of it sometime yesterday to say.  During entry?  After entry?  I don't know when or why but I thought it and now I have to say it!  That's life I guess.  Also maybe I want to clog my drain.  That way I can take baths!  Otherwise the bathwater would never accumulate you idiots.  Impossible!
     Last paragraph of the act.  VERY Wonderful!  I lost track of whether I said anything the last 4 paragraphs.  I feel like I talked about Superman for a while and the rest is a blur.  Oh I see.  Just looked Up The Screen A Bit and saw, "Peanut Butter and Taffy."  It wasn't a joke but it provided a public service!  Now the public knows to never get Clark Bars.  Maybe the Clark Bar only lived in the 1940's with Superman but JUST IN CASE it's still around.  Maybe you should be giving mini Clark Bars out to trick or treaters.  And then after they say Trick Or Treat you hand it to them and devilishly laugh THE TRICK IS THE TREAT!!!  And then move on with the rest of your day.  Something along those lines.  Anyway the great news is its time to cleanse myself.  I'll be back in a little bit!




Look I'm Almost Done Here

    What's going on friends.  Got a whole lotta day to look forward to after this.  Looking forward to day is fun!  Then the day is much less fun.  Also not so much recalibrating lately!  Recalibrating has been replaced by just Looking Forward.  Whatever happens'll happen.  I don't calibrate it so much!  Anyway today I learned my lesson and squeezed out half the amount of shampoo as I've been doing before.  Still probably too much!  Oh well live and learn.  Presumably.  I've lived a fair amount and learned a little.  Presumably I will live even more and possibly learn more, too!  I feel like I've unlearned a lot, too.  Sure I learn as life continues to go on.  But it's offset pretty evenly with forgetting things, finding out things I thought were wrong without them being replaced by right things, and/or learning new incorrect things.  So basically it's a wash.
     Yeah!  What the Hell.  William Shatner successfully Took Off In Rocket and then it just fell back down to the Earth and that was it?  That's not going into space!  That's NOTHING.  Either way I'm happy for him that he's not dead yet but I am NOT impressed with this, "Going To Space."  I don't think it counts at all!  And it matters what I think counts and doesn't count!  I am the authority on What Counts!  Gotta be an authority on something!  I CAN'T BELIEVE I started going into this post season a week ago thinking I might be rooting for Them Atlanta Braves.  Now I realize I was wrong and can't fathom what I was thinking!  WHAT JERKS is the point I'm trying to make.  I forget why.  I think part of it was hearing and seeing the tomahawk chop.  Both because it's racist and also it just reminded me oh right these are THOSE jerks gotcha.  I wasn't placing the 2021 Atlanta Braves with The Atlanta Braves of the last few decades.  Now I see IT'S THE SAME TEAM.  Not a fan!
     What else is going on.  For people who didn't like American Indians, Sports Teams of the 19th and 20th century sure loved NAMING THEMSELVES after them.  Why would they choose to identify as Indians or Braves or Redskins if they didn't admire them indigenous tribes to some extent?  I think this is an underreported aspect of the story!  No I don't.  But the point is I Said It and now we all get to move on with our lives.  Gonna take a nice short break between Act and Walk.  Not a big midlength break like between 45 minutes and an hour.  More like between thirty minutes and 45 minutes.  Also for some reason I am going back and forth between using Digits and Words.  Go figure!  You can count on me for some CRAZY Stuff!  Like going back and forth between digits and words.  What will I think of next.  What do you mean next.  I haven't thought of anything in weeks!
     Penultimate paragraph.  I got an e-mail alert for some reason that crazysheet.com is up for sale!  Which this website used to be.  Then I stopped paying for the domain!  Got snatched up by some Fantasy Football Website Enterprise.  Now they're selling it apparently!  It was listed at 2,999 dollars.  A little out of my price range!  I'd counter offer with 2,999 NOTHINS.  I don't want it anymore! I'm fine with .net and that's just the way it is.  If anything you have to PAY ME 3000 dollars for it.  Wait no.  I'd accept FIVE dollars.  I won't go any lower than that, though!  That's where I draw some sort of line or something I forget exactly what I was talking about.  What was the first candy bar ever eaten in space.  My guess?  Hershey Bar!  Standard chocolate bar.  You wanna go with something uncomplicated for First Candy Bar In Space.  That's not funny or interesting.  It's just TRUE.
Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  I wonder if William Shatner gave an interesting speech before or after his Space Flight.  My guess is probably not.  He's 90 and presumably can't muster up anything other than mumbling.  At 90 you're past the age of Speaking Coherent Words!  Oh well that's life.  What else is going on.  I'm sure he's still mumbling incoherently in his same famous weird speech pattern style, though!  Ah.  Wonderful.  I would think he'd be disqualified from being an astronaut for that alone.  This guy talks in a weird rhythm sometimes.  Not sure we want that kind of risk In Space.  NEXT.  I dunno.  Also I know Star Trek says space is the final frontier, but I wouldn't be surprised if we find out there's even more frontiers after space.  Great.  Whatever.  The entry is over!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:17 P.M.




Tuesday, October 12, 2021

Someone's Got To Do It

    What's going on friends.  Cut my hair last night!  By which I mean my Dad cut my hair 90% and I cut my hair 5%.  The other 5% was some sort of ghost.  But then I shaved myself 100%!  Also I did the set up and clean up 80%.  Also 100% of the hair was mine.  Also I lived in my Dad's house but I feel at this point the house is 25% mine.  Huh.  Anyway pretty short haircut!  Last night I was happy with how it was even enough and presentable, but upset with how short.  Today?  Not bad!  Nice Neat Haircut.  Also I didn't get hair all over the house!  And if I did not my problem anymore!  The point is that's a paragraph.  I cut my hair.  GOOD STUFF.  Hmm still time to salvage this paragraph.  My dad accidentally threw out small brush that you brush the haircutting apparatus with to get out loose hair in the garbage.  He had me go through the garbage to get it!  Uncharacteristic of him!  Usually he's a neat freak.  Not this time!  Gotta get mini-brush from the garbage!  But it all worked out in the end because I Retrieved It.  Presumably washed it in the sink as well as my hands.  Can't say for certain, though!
     Anyway, great.  Now I don't have to do that ever again for a few months at least.  Some nice baseball games going on today.  Three!  All of them could be deciding games in the series!  That'll show the losing team if they lose!  Show them real good!  Show them that their season is over and whatnot.  Maybe some of their players can play in Winterball somewhere.  MAYBE.  Where do they play Winterball.  I want to say some Latin American country.  Let's LTURQ.  VENEZUELA.  DOMINICAN REPUBLIC.  MEXICO.  VENEZUELA AGAIN.  PUERTO RICO.  NOT CUBA.  That settles that.  Good luck to any American who wants to play there.  Language barrier is too restricting!  BEISBOL?  WHAT THE HELL IS THAT?  That sort of thing.  Because not only do Americans not speak Spanish, but they are particularly dumb.  Gottem.
Wait a second I'm an American!  Hmm interesting counter-point.  What else is going on.  In The Day After Tomorrow we can play baseball in America.  Because it's warmer!  Baseball Weather!  Anyway.  Any thought go into making a sequel called TOMORROW.  My guess?  No not any serious discussion.  Maybe someone like me has proposed it but hopefully they don't take people like me seriously at all.  For their sake!  Also for MY sake.  If they're taking people like me seriously, then what do they need me for.  They already got these other people like me.  I'm A Redundant!  Oh well that's life.  I assume Friday After Next was a Wayans Bros. Movie parodying The Day After Tomorrow.  Either that or an Ice Cube Mike Epps vehicle.  Movies aren't vehicles.  With the possible exception of Gran Torino.  I made that joke in roughly 2018.  Something 90% like that at least.  Oh well live and learn.  Other exceptions-- CHRISTINE, THE BATMOBILE, etc.  There was a movie called The Batmobile.  I feel very strongly about this!  Gotta imagine there's 2-3 other well known movies named after the main character which is a car.  Hmm.  Oh what about that Racing Car movie.  Days of Thunder.  I imagine one of the cars was named Days Of Thunder??  Ugh.  I'll think about this over the rest of the entry and keep you updated.
     Yeah!  APOLLO 13.  I'll accept it!  Anyway.  TAXI.  The Jimmy Fallon/Queen Latifah vehicle.  OKAY time to move on.  Then again moving on would require me to think of a new topic.  Sounds tough.  But important to do!  Okay with my shave.  Pretty close shave!  Not a 100% shave but certainly a 85, 90% shave.  Which is perfect EXCEPT for the fact it means my facial hair will accumulate that much quicker than if it was 100%.  Maybe I can shave every week like a weekly adult man.  I wouldn't put it past me!  So I got that going for me.  The Red Sox have eliminated the Tampa Bay Devil Rays from the 2021 playoffs!  WOW.  Too bad for the Devil Rays!  I hope they're all on Suicide Watch for the next few weeks.  At least up until and through the World Series.  Anyway.  American League Championship Series may be Red Sox versus White Sox.  RED VERSUS WHITE?  THIS IS COLUMBUS DAY/INDIGENOUS PEOPLE'S DAY ALL OVER AGAIN.
Ugh!  A POSITIVE Ugh.  Coffee after this paragraph.  Watched the updated version of The Carrie over the last two days.  Okay stuff!  It's a PUN.  Because women CARRY children in their bellies per my understanding.  And THIS VERSION starts with Carrie's mother giving birth to Carrie.  So it SUGGESTS carrying child in your stomach.  Wonderful.  Also she can Carrie Things through telekinesises.  Doesn't even need to bother holding books or putting a book bag around her back.  Just telekinesis it here and there wherever she goes.  WOW how convenient!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also what's so bad with getting covered with pigs' blood.  Take a shower!  Not that big a deal!  No reason you have to kill everybody.  If you're gonna kill everybody you need a SLIGHTLY better reason!  That's my official position.
     What else is going on.  Carrie is kind of outdated.  This is 50 years ago! These days if a kid wants to kill everyone at school they don't need telekinesis all they need is some guns.  Also there's no STAKES to killing all the kids in school.  We're desensitized to it!  We just accept that it will happen every now and again!  Anyway what else is going on.  Imagine all the GOOD you can do with telekinesis.  Off the top of my head Free Carnival Rides.  Make some sort of ferris wheel just powered by your own thoughts.  HELP people.  Yep that's the main way I can think of helping people.  Free Transparent Ferris Wheel.  You've got MY attention!  I said it.  To myself.  Of course my attention is there.  Yep.  Not sure how safe this ferris wheel is.  You break Carrie's concentration just a little bit and everyone might fall to their death!  I dunno.  IT depends on how carefully Carrie must concentrate.  Maybe once she sets it into motion she can just wander off and do something else.  We don't KNOW because she never TRIED.
     Seventh paragraph!  Carrie is like WHY WON'T PEOPLE LIKE ME.  BETTER KILL THEM.  She should have gone in with a positive attitude from the start. HELP people you idiot.  Anyway great we're gettin' decently deep into the entry.  I can, "Dig," that!  Did I mention the Red Sox will face the White Sox, or did I start that sentence and then lose track of what Iw as saying and started saying something else.  OH I SAID IT.  Red versus white.  Indigenous versus Colonizers.  Now its all coming back to me.  What else is going on.  I wanted to root for the White Sox for some reason but I'm just not excited about their players!  There's Jose Abreu The Slugger BUT He's not overweight like I always imagined him.  I want a slugger to be slightly overweight!  He's relatively normal body type!  NO THANK YOU.  Possibly a little on the chubby side for an athlete, hard to tell, but either way NOT ENOUGH.
     Ugh.  NOT A POSITIVE UGH.  Not a wholly negative UGH either.  Somewhere in the middle.  Great.  Gotta imagine I weigh less without all that hair.  We're talking maybe a tenth of an ounce.  WOW that's like THREE grams or something.  Per my understanding.  Not negligible at all!  If Jose Abreu was a tenth of an ounce and/or like three grams heavier MAYBE JUST MAYBE I'd be more on board with him.  What else is going on.  My Mom is trying to peer pressure me into making and/or having communal pasta soon.  Normally FINE LET'S MIX IT UP I'M OKAY WITH THAT.  But NOT NOW.  Spoiler Alert-- I still have a Super Market Made deal which is half pasta for this week.  Maybe next week with the communal pasta okay?  NOT NOW!  A little TOO MUCH inside info there?  I feel if I don't elaborate any further on Mealtalk this isn't giving the whole ballgame away.
    I read the scores of yesterday MLB Playoff Games on google.  They gave the whole ballgame away.  GREAT JUST WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR.  Ninth paragraph!  New Jacket came yesterday!  Presumably sweatshirt jacket!  Haven't looked at it yet but presumably I will today.  My interest is palpable!  If interest can be palpable.  I feel like there's a solid 2/3rds shot interest can be palpable.  I just looked up exact definition of palpable on google.  Now I feel like there's a solid 85% chance interest can be palpable!  WOW this keeps getting better and better!  Just had a brief half a second thought okay now I'll LURQ on google what my new jacket looks like!  Then I realized oh that's in real life.  Live and learn!  Is palpable related to pulmonary!  I feel like your heart is palpable when it pumps blood or something.  This is probably wrong but it is TRULY how I half way sort of imagined the word definition.  Also SPOILER ALERT when I said pulmonary I meant to do with the heart not lungs.  That's why I said when it pumps blood.  Basically there's nine things in this paragraph that are wrong.  That's a lot for a single paragraph!
     Last paragraph of the act.  Wonderful.  Good chance I'll spend a decent amount of the day watching The Major League Baseball.  It's halfway entertaining enough!  What else is going on.  CHUCKY TV series is tonight!  Along with Spin Off of George Romero films!  Which I just learned about a day or two ago!  Either way I'm definitely not expecting something on par with the original three Living Dead Films but if his estate is engaged with it to whatever degree it should hopefully be PRETTY good.  By which I mean pretty zombies.  Attractive zombies!  With things hanging out in all the right places.  Boobs I meant.  Those are the main things that could be hanging out that I would be into.  Butts too I guess.  Anyway.  I was thinking about it and I think Child's Play may have been a trendsetter re: having R Rated Horror Films halfway geared towards a young children audience.  It has CHILD right in the name of the title!  Must be good for children!  And then we realized ALL horror movies past and present are ALSO good for children.  So basically good for them?  I might have talked about that before.  I'll talk about it again!  Well maybe not again, at this point 2 or 3 times is enough.   The point is I'll be back in a little bit.




That's Where You're Wrong

    Hello friends.  I've talked about being upset about how much MLB Players turn out to be.  Sometimes they're too fat!  Sometimes they're not fat enough!  ALSO I've talked about everything else I just talked about before.  But besides all that it's been a real worthwhile entry.  Anyway gonna take a bath and/or a shower soon!  Gotta make sure all hair is off my body by then.  Can't have hair clogging up drains!  That'd negatively impact my life somewhere down the line!  Then again having to spend 30 seconds making sure there's no leftover hair on me is gonna negatively impact my life RIGHT NOW.  Lots of work!  So it's an interesting trade off and I'm gonna have to make a decision on this pretty quickly.  Hmm.  I'd be on board with some communal French Toast.  Now you're talking my language!  EXCEPT for how half the loaf of bread we got for it will go to waste.  Other than that it's a worthwhile enterprise!
     Hmm.  I wish I had some French Toast RIGHT NOW.  Maybe I Do!  That's for me to know and you to never find out.  Dunno why that's such a good retort for kids to say about things.  That's for me to know and you to find out!  That's not so bad for The Other Guy!  You're gonna find out eventually!  Pretty good stuff!  Most people will NEVER know about this situation at all.  Just take a breath and move on with your life until you inevitably Find Out.  Then enjoy yourself You Now Know!  Ugh.  Also haven't you ever heard that ignorance is bliss.  This guy Who Knows might suffer from his knowledge.  You're doing better off without being troubled by this horrifying truth.  Ugh.  Look Ignorance is PRETTY Good but I dunno about bliss.  Might have made that joke before.  Either way it's an important point.  Ignorance certainly has a lot going for it but bliss is overselling it A BIT.  YEAH! 
     Third paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Why would I have hair covering my body.  I just got my hair cut.  I have LESS hair than I used to.  Now you're saying I have hair all over the place-- when I didn't before?  You've got it all backwards my friend!  What else is going on.  First baseball game of the day is at 2:07.  AMAZING.  When I was a kid games would start at :05's or :10's.  I guess in today's modern world they're like yeah we're not happy with those better split the difference.  ALSO round down to :07 instead of up to :08.  OH I KNOW WHY.  Because it IS right in the middle at :07 and thirty seconds.  Which APPEARS just like :07.  OH OKAY now that makes a lot of sense I get it now.  SO that's that I guess.  Then again there's gonna be a lot of angry people who tune in at :07 and No Seconds and are enraged when the game doesn't start for thirty seconds.  Well that's a consequence I guess they decided they can live with.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  I don't believe it!  I'd eat some communal pancakes.  Maybe order some chocolate chip morsels before hand.  Then put them in a glass.  Then guzzle them down.  Then later in the week eat some pancakes.  Hmm seems to check out.  Then again who has time to make pancakes when you can just guzzle down pancake mix.  That's what a lot of people tried when they saw Rocky guzzle down uncooked eggs in a glass.  Hey this must work for all breakfasts.  Lot of copycat Breakfast Guzzlers that year is the point!  Anyway I don't care how bad or vaguely good enough that may be.  It's time to move on with my lives.  Gotta make sure the chocolate chip morsels don't clog up the drain in my bathtub.  How would that happen.  Look I don't need to justify my personal life to you.  Get off my back about it and whatnot!
     Last paragraph of the act!  It's about time!  Gotta imagine chocolate chips are meltable.  If something melts it can't clog up things.  Over time water will completely erode it!  As it will everything.  If you give anything enough time, water will erode it!  Except for plastic!  And possibly 80% of other things!  What else is going on.  Must be hard to predict when baseball game will start.  What if the National Anthem goes long?  Not sure what that accomplishes.  Only making me that much closer to the end of the paragraph.  Off the top of my head that's literally the only thing it accomplishes.  ALSO FIGURATIVELY.  Great.  Great!  Of course Rocky has to guzzle down eggs.  He can't COOK eggs, he's got things to do!  Like run around town.  What a jerk.  He thinks he's better than us?  We don't have to put up with this!  Wonderful.  I'll be back in a little bit.




You're O.K. In My Book

    Hey!  Time to wrap up the entry.  Man I must have a lot in store to say.  Only 60% of which has been said before!  Let's get it goin'.  Didn't see any hair at all going into bath or coming out of bath or IN bath.  So I got that going for me.  Also I pumped too much shampoo into my hand!  I needed maybe a third of this amount of shampoo.  Oh well now I know for later.  Also that's another great reason to have short hair.  Save on shampoo!  Then again you're LOSING money by having to cut your hair more often.  So it all comes out in the wash.  Not if you're lucky like me!  If it's coming out in the wash, it being your hair, then you're in for a world of trouble down the line.  Amazing.  Are we supposed to shampoo facial hair.  I've never done that.  Maybe I should have been.  Oh well too late now.  Might have already made that question-observation on this website seven times before.  YET STILL NO ONE ANSWERS ME.
Cool.  Gonna take maybe a half hour break between Entry and Walk.  Long enough to accomplish SOMETHIN.  Like a 22 minute TV Show Episode.  Hmm.  Doesn't get much more of an accomplishment than watching A television set program!  I talk about that all the time.  Watching TV is the most productive thing I do.  I'm not proud of it.  I'm a little proud of it!  I watch TV better than other people, I feel.  Why shouldn't I take pride in that?  What else is going on.  It's good I wasn't covered in hair because it'd be a hassle and a half, but I do feel a bit let down that I didn't get to experience that.  It would have been a problem but a FUN problem.  I'd have to use my problem solving abilities to figure it out!  Now all my problem solving abilities are going to waste!  And if I don't solve a problem soon they're gonna start to stagnate and I'll eventually lose those powers for future problems.  Now THAT'S a problem.
Ugh.  I saw there's speculation the Mets could trade their top prospect for another team's general manager.  Gotta imagine if they do that, as soon as he's officially a Met, he'd be like okay first thing I'm gonna do is inform you YOU JUST DID THE WRONG THING.  RIGHT OFF THE BAT I'M NOT PLEASED.  We gotta please General Manager!  If he's not happy his work will suffer.  And if his work suffers ALL of our works suffer.  Huh.  Then again he might be happy about it if you look at it the other way.  As his final act as GM for the other team, Milwaukee, he gets them a top prospect and all he had to give up Was Him.  It's a tough conundrum.  He might have a conflict of interest with himself.  Who he wants to benefit depends on how he chooses to look at it!  The ball is in his court and whatnot.  Whatever.  This paragraph is solidly OVER.
Penultimate paragraph.  Now if we're talking about trading the top prospect for Milwaukee's STADIUM, I'm all ears!  AND of course we keep Citifield.  We just not have a bonus backup arena.  In Milwaukee.  Fair trade!  Ugh.  What else is going on.  I want a stadium with a retractable roof.  I feel like I've been missing out by watching baseball games without there being a roof.  I think there being a roof would be fun!  Great.  This is great stuff.  Also what's so great about this Potential GM From Milwaukee.  He's just another jerk.  WOW he went to college and worked in baseball for a few years.  Probably got some sort of dumb name and/or haircut.  NOT IMPRESSED!  So there's that to consider.  How's William Shatner going.  Is he in space and/or dead yet.  Better LTURQ.  Not until tomorrow I think.  All he has to do is live another 24 hours!  I don't think they'll still send him up to space if he's a corpse by then.  JUST KEEP IT GOING ANOTHER DAY YOU CAN DO THIS.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  Then again that's gotta be a mile stone at SOME point.  First corpse in space.  What else is going on.  Maybe that's how zombies are made!  We won't know until we test it out.  Hmm maybe I should volunteer to be the corpse.  Something to consider.  Nah they'd want someone with more of an Air Force background or something.  What else is going on.  What's the next chore I have to do.  Might be nothing until accepting Super market delivery Friday morning!  Wow that's roughly TWO AND A HALF DAYS of nothing.  I've heard of Two and a Half MEN but Two and a half Days?!?!  What will they think of next!  Hopefully better stuff.  That'd be my instinct of what to hope for.  Anyway hey the entry is over.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:10 P.M.




Monday, October 11, 2021

I'm Busy Writing Titles

    Hello friends.  What's going on and whatnot.  Today is Monday!  Got Sprite Zero Sugar going.  WELL THAT'S ALL I GOT.  I'm continuing to lose weight vertically.  Instead of gradually becoming less thick around my belly the normal, horizontal way it's condensing into a vertical roll of fat!  GOOD STUFF.  I like a body that mixes things up.  I'm one of a kind!  Well if this is happening to me surely it happens to other people.  I dunno about that!  I feel like 80% of my life Surely Doesn't Happen To Other People.  Pretty unique life circumstances I got going on!  Mostly negative things BUT it's fun just to have a unique life.  So it evens out is the point.  OH NO I'm up to the final season of The Twilight Zone!  You know what that means.  ONLY 200 EPISODES LEFT.  It's weird to have watched all The Twilight Zonoes.  Always kinda felt like there were unlimited episodes when you see it on TV now and then.  Now I will have seen all of them?  I'm Scared Hold Me.
What else is going on.  MLB Playoffs going on.  I like the HOMERUNS.  Then again too many homeruns cheapen the home runs.  Hmm.  I feel like if I knew every stolen base attempt would be successful I'd like them, but I HATE an unsuccessful stolen base.  YOU JUST RAN YOUR WAY RIGHT OUT OF AN INNING WELL DONE YOU IDIOT.  Not worth the risk!  I don't mean the risk of running yourself out of an inning.  I mean the risk of Upsetting Me The Viewer Of The Baseball Game.  You don't wanna get on my bad side!  Hmm I don't have sides.  There's 360 Degrees Of Me.  No singular sides at all!  In 40 Shades of Gray I assume they spend roughly 3 minutes describing each shade.  Otherwise I may not know what that movie is about.  What do you mean it's fifty shades of gray.  I only know of 40 shades of gray.  I guess that's why I'm only 80% into that kind of sex stuff.  Now it all makes sense.
What else is going on.  I can only think of one shade of gray.  Two or three tops!  Fifty is definitely pushing it.  Yep the movie is all about PUSHING in Sex.  Exploring the fetish of pushing your partner during sex.  Hmm.  Sounds fun.  Real Fun!  I GOTTA GO FOR A MINUTE.  TAKE CARE OF BUSINESS.  Anyway I'm back.  I never left to take care of business.  That was just some clever misdirection.  I don't get Big Momma's House.  I've seen this movie.  The house is a VERY Minor Character.  Big Momma is the star of this movie!  Yep.  Sure.  Not sure why that was important to bring up here.  I SAW BIG MOMMA'S HOUSE PLAYING ON TV YESTERDAY.  FOLLOWED BY BIG MOMMA'S HOUSE TWO.  Also I believe the sequel doesn't even take place in Big Momma's House at all!  What even IS life.  I've talked about all this before.  Gray Shades.  Big Momma's house.  Hey how abut this 50 Shades of Other Colors.  Why settle on Gray.  NOPE.  Would have been better off without that!  Oh well live and learn.
Penultimate paragraph of paragraphs without coffee!  Gotta look for the little things in life to celebrate.  Hmm.  What's the littlest things I can think of.  GAME BOY.  I don't have one on me to celebrate but I guess I could just celebrate them in theory!  Also 30 years later you can't get away with calling a portable gaming system a Game Boy.  Game CHILD is more like it.  Or make game boys AND game girls.  That's one way to go.  Which is great because hermaphrodites will want to buy both.  Is hermaphrodites still the PC term for someone whose both.  Can't think of another one off the top of my head.  Either way the last game boy I had was a Game Boy Color which is already ahead of the game and pretty progressive for its time.  Because I assume it was mainly marketed to People Of Color, right?  That's where the name comes from?  YEAH.  Almost a joke!  And almost phrased in a halfway decent enough way.  WOW almosts?  Now we're talking!
Fifth paragraph.  Talked about Game Boy before.  I'll talk about it again.  Unfortunately.  What else is going on.  Haircut tonight!  Gotta find where my hair cutting apparatus is and plug it in several hours beforehand.  Oh well live and learn.  Can't someone just scalp me.  It's easier!  Gotta imagine that's accurate.  Don't gotta be careful to get scalping just right.  You can scalp someone in 20 seconds, right?  That's how I imagine scalpings.  Just get it over with.  Also what do Scalped People Do.  Can't have your brain exposed for the rest of your life.  It'll get dirty!  And your brain is already dirty enough you dirty little freak.  That's right I'm calling you out!  For your pervertedness, etc.  What else is going on.  Forget scalping.  Might as well just kill me.  That way I never have to do anything again ever!  ALRIGHT time to CHILLAX.
I think I meant that as a halfway original joke but it's a very common refrain among adults.  I'd RATHER BE DEAD THAN HAVE TO HAVE THIS LIFE.  I hear it all the time!  Literally 100% of people I know have said that out loud time and again.  FUNNY STUFF.  I've never felt that.  Even when I hated life as I have on occasion.  Still don't wanna be DEAD.  That'd be the worst!  Anyway what else is going on.  My Dad alerted me they're sending William Shatner into space.  And I believed him.  Then as I walked upstairs I started thinking maybe that was a joke he heard somewhere and mistook it for reality?  I'm gonna say solid 95% chance he heard accurately.  Lemme LTURQ.  YEP IT'S REAL.  My Dad is on top of things!  He knows what's going on out there in the world!  And BEYOND the world as it is.  Anyway.  I assume the plan is to bring William Shatner back from Space too.  That'd be a deal breaker for me.  I'm only going if you promise to bring me back!
What else is going on.  I guess William Shatner is gonna be the first person to Perform Acting in space.  EVER.  He's going down in history for that!  Hmm what kinda monologue is good for him to do.  I don't know any monologues.  Oh right the Vagina Ones.  He can do those I guess.  I dunno!  People would be really upset if Shatner Rocket Ship explodes.  Oh no we lost AN ACTOR this is way worse than losing astronauts.  I'VE SEEN THIS GUY ON THE TV A BUNCH OF TIMES.   What else is going on.  I haven't seen William Shatner on the TV that many times.  More times than the average person, sure.  Either way.  What is William Shatner's job in Rocket Ship if not acting.  Gotta imagine they're giving him SOME sort of responsibility to make himself useful.  Right?  Maybe not!  He's just a tourist.  I dunno if I'm being a tourist in a rocket ship I'm gonna want at least A PRETEND Job.  Even if it's totally fake and I know it.  They say hey mimic pressing these buttons while the rocket goes off!  It will go off without you but you get to pretend.  I'd do that.  Pressing buttons?  Now I HOLD ALL THE CARDS.
I dunno what else is going on.  It's more likely to die in a rocket ship on the way to the launch site than during takeoff itself.  Hmm.  Eighth paragraph!  We're always talking about faster trains so why can't we have rocket trains.  Gotta imagine if we implement rocketry with ground transportation we can really get where we're going quickly.  Maybe TOO QUICKLY.  No wait not too quickly.  Maybe not quickly enough!  Wait no not not quickly enough.  Maybe too quickly.  What The Hell.  What am I Talking about.  Oh right Train Rocketry.  Makes sense.  Why would a rocket powered vehicle need to be on tracks.  For STYLE and SAFETY.  Ugh.  If you're not following pre-existing train tracks you're gonna risk crashing your Rocket Train into something or SOMEONE.  And at the speed we're talking about we're talking Total Destructions.
     YEAH.  William Shatner?  More like William SHITner.  I'm calling you out!  Anyway I may have never seen a complete episode or movie of A Star Trek.  Wait.  I think I saw a Star Trek movie in theaters roughly 2010-2013.  WOW THAT'S A LONG MOVIE.  Amazing.  Either way it starts off their on another planet.  And they're in a ship or something.  And they're like can't let other planet inhabitants see us it will confuse them at this point in their history development.  Yep!  Based on that you can determine which Star Trek I saw.  I envy you.  They're doing a Space Ship on The Day Formerly Known As Columbus Day?  Amazing!  He was an explorer or something and now so is William Shatner.  Are they doing the Space Ship today?  Better LTURQ.  Eh I don't feel like it.  Just let it be known Maybe It's Today Maybe It Isn't.  If you care so much look it up yourself you idiot.
Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  COLUMBUS SAILED ACROSS THE OCEAN.  What have Indigenous People ever done.  Hmm.  They LIVED.  Not impressed!  I've lived my entire life and it was a breeze.  Never sailed across the ocean!  That's something to commemorate!  Anyway.  HEY Indigenous people crossed the ancient land bridge from Russia to Alaska.  YEAH A LONG TIME AGO.  What have they done since.  NOTHIN'.  Anyway what else is going on.  Knee hurts a little bit.  Right knee!  Been doing lots of walking.  Maybe not as Ancient Indigenous People but my fair share!  Lots of push ups and sit ups.  Somewhere along the line my right knee has had enough!  Oh well I can power through it.  Not too bad!  YEAH.  If we're using rocket ships for trains maybe we should use trains for rocket ships.  It'll take a while to lay the tracks to the moon but once we do it's SAFE and PRACTICAL.  Sure great that'll do it for now.  Be back soon!




You Know What I Say

    Maybe I do.  Hey time to write five paragraphs.  Got some Coca Cola Zero going on.  When it's Coca it's a, "C," in the middle but when it's Coke it's a, "K."  WHO COMES UP WITH THIS STUFF.  Presumably Colonel Sanders.  He's the guy who made Coca Cola right?  I can't think of anything else he might have been in charge of.  COLON EL?  Well if you eat enough chicken it'll get to YOUR colon!  Even if you eat a miniscule amount of chicken.  Gotta imagine that'll reach your colon.  Maybe you just pee it out if it's that small amount of chicken.  I don't know how your body works!  Frankly I don't wanna know that much!  Maybe a little bit but I can survive without it!  Gotta imagine there's some people who order fried chicken and just eat the fried breading and throw out the chicken.  WOW.  Probably some multiple of TWENTIES of those people in America alone!  We're talkin sixty?  Eighty?  A hundred and twenty???!!!??
Amazing.  I might have said that before.  About throwing out Chicken and eating Fried.  Not my fault that it's a topic that occurs to me so often.  Well maybe it is kind of my fault.  That checks out too.  Four baseball games going today?  That's too much!  I'm gonna feel peer pressured by Baseball TV all day to watch baseball TV.  Why should I?  There's SCRIPTED and SEMI-SCRIPTED things I could be watching.  Not so much semi-scripted things.  Everything I may watch off the top of my head is FULLY scripted.  Or at least 90% scripted which ROUNDS UP.  So I got THAT going for me.  What if there's a huge baseball conspiracy that the games are all scripted.  Oh no I'm scared hold me.  You'd think if they're scripting the games they'd make them more interesting.  You'd be WRONG.  By making the games still uninteresting they're throwing us off their scent.  VERY clever.  Anyway great just great.
     Hmm.  Has anyone ever thought to do an offshoot of professional wrestling that is actual competition wrestling.  But they still keep the spirit of having characters and storylines and all that fun stuff.  But they actually have real wrestling competitions!  That sounds like a MILLION DOLLAR IDEA waiting to happen.  Wow a million dollars?  Well for me at least.  I think I should get a flat rate of a million dollars Right Here Right Now from whoever wants to take the reins.  Sounds fair.  VERY fair.  Also yes it has to be somewhat more violent and intense than regular wrestling.  SOMEWHAT.  Anyway what else is going on.  Also every match is A Cage Match.  SURE they don't utilize the cage because what would that have to do with Regular Wrestling.  But it's still there for some reason!  No one is really sure why!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  A cage match is when they put a cage around the ring.  Presumably so wrestlers could climb it.  And then presumably jump on their opponents from the top of the cage.  That's what I'd do at least.  Anyway moving on.  I think there are some cage matches where the conceit is you have to escape the cage and the first person to get out of the cage wins.  How amusing.  But for some reason they spend 20 minutes wrestling with each other.  You'd think as soon as the bell rings they each start climbing the cage.  Nope!  They gotta spend 20 minutes doing Piledrivers.  HEY THAT MAKES SENSE.  Before you climb the cage you wanna make sure your opponent is FATIGUED and can't climb the cage himself.  That way you can climb the cage with less pressure on you because your opponent is lying in the ring, Completely Piledrived, and you can COAST to the top of the cage!  Oh Okay Now It Makes Sense.
Last paragraph of the act!  It's been five or ten minutes.  Has anyone decided to pay me 1 million dollars yet for Real Wrestling Idea?  Oh this hasn't been published to the internet yet.  Gotta wait 5 or 10 minutes after publishing to the internet!  Hmm great I have something to look forward to then!  Maybe entrepreneurs hack into my computer and read the entries slightly before other people can.  In which case hey great what else is going on.  William Shatner is 90.  He may be the first person to die from old age in space.  That's not a bad thing to be remembered for!  Well he'll be DEAD. Being dead is a bad thing to be remembered for for YOU because you won't be able to bask in your memorableness.  Too busy being dead!  Anyway great.  I'll be back in a little bit!




There's Always Tomorrow

    Presumably.  Hey great what else is going on.  Got some Sprite Zeroe going on right now.  Wow I keep going back and forth between Coke Zero and Sprite Zero.  If you know a better way to drink your soda I'd like to hear it!  What kind of idiot drinks all his coke zero and then all his sprite zero.  The biggest idiot in the world, that's who.  Got some CHORES coming up.  Gotta bring Shower Seat from one room into another soon.  That will take upwards of a minute!  Gotta find Hair Cutting Apparatus and plug it in.  That will take an entire other minute potentially.  JESUS CHRIST JUST KILL ME.  I'd be a privilege to be dead rather than live with all this responsibility!  Of having to do 90 seconds worth of things over the next 8 hours.  It's just not worth living in this scenario. 
    Hmm that was an entire paragraph.  Gotta move shower seat and find hair cutting apparatus.  Good stuff!  Now it's time to move on, though.  It's already spread to the beginning of this paragraph and that's just plain too much!  What else is going on.  Got coffee #2 going.  Delicious!  I decided to keep track of how long it'll take me to finish Coffee Mate Bottle.  To see how much I actually use!  I THINK it'll end up being pretty close to what I've been approximating!  GOOD NEWS.  I'm RIGHT about something.  Not good news that it's less than I'd been approximating.  That'd be even GOODER news.  But it's good news to know I was right about something even if that something is terrible.  Great.  No team has won their Division Series in MLB Playoffs yet?  THIS IS TAKING FOREVER.  JUST KILL ME NOW.  Hmm you should have killed me last paragraph.  If you haven't killed me By Now I'm not 100% confident you'll EVER kill me.  Great just great.
     What else is going on.  Is it legal to kill your opponent in baseball.  What if it's an accident!  Gotta imagine there's something in the rule book about that.  Let's say you hit the ball at an outfielder so hard it kills them.  How do they score that play.  Maybe like a ground rule double?  Umpire'll give you 2nd base.  That sounds like a fair compromise that both teams can agree to.  Yep.  Gonna have a nice decent sized break between Entry and Next Walk.  I say that every day now!  And it's true every day!  What a wonderful world and/or whatnot.  Somehow I'm getting up at a pretty consistent time each day.  I set my alarm early.  I snooze once or twice.  And then ultimately I end up settling for getting up roughly 8:30 each day!  Amazing.  Should I start setting my alarm for 8:30 then.  No of course not.  Then I'd start getting up at 9:30 each day!  AND THAT'S WAY TOO LATE.  YEAH.
Penultimate paragraph.  Also IN THE MORNING.  We're talking, "A.M."  Which I believe stands for AT MORNING.  Hmm.  What does AM Radio stand for.  AT MORNING RADIO  that's easy.  Better LTURQ.  Both Real AM and AM Radio. ANTE MERIDIEM.  Latin for Before Noon.  AMAZING.  We don't speak Latin anymore.  What the Hell.  How is this a holdover from 2000 years ago.  You'd think at some point we would have started using a more modern language.  Nope!  Okay now let's check out AM Radio.  AMPLITUDE MODULATION.  Just as I suspected!  If nothing else we all learned something this paragraph.  Except for those of you who already know.  And those of you who don't believe me.  Gotta imagine a lot of people have learned not to believe me when I say things.  And thus they've learned nothing from this paragraph.  I pity them and/or you.
Last paragraph of the day!  I don't believe it.  So much day left to do things with!  I get excited about that every day.  Then every day is always a snooze.  But this day may be different!  SO MANY BASEBALLS.  Hopefully none.  That's a big part of why days lately have been a snooze!  Wasting free time on baseballs!  I could be doing better re: Entertainment Choices!  What else is going on.  I think you should get a triple if you kill an outfielder with the baseball.  You should be rewarded SOME way at least.  Ugh.  HEY I JUST MOVED CHAIR.  So if nothing else I accomplished that.  Uh oh If Nothing Else that's not very much of an accomplishment for the day.  SOMETHIN' I guess.  Better than being dead for my family!  Then again if I was dead maybe they wouldn't even NEED shower chair.  Not sure how that works.  Either way the entry is over!  Be back tomorrow.

-12:31 P.M.




Sunday, October 10, 2021

Here Comes Some Decent

    Hey friends!  Time to write some more.  It's Sunday Morning.  Otherwise known as The Day And Time My Bowling League Would Take Place.  Hmm.  Got some oranged soda going on right now.  Coffee will come in a few paragraphs as always.  Well we covered the important stuff.  Beverages.  Bowling League.  That's about it off the top of my head!  Anyway been watching That Twilight Zone lately!  I dunno if I just happened to hit a good streak of good episodes, or if I'm just in the right headspace for it lately, but I'm getting a kick out of 'em!  I like the part where Rod Sterling is like Hello friends.  This guy is some guy.  Plot gonna happen.  THIS is The Twilight Zone.  Rod Sterling thinks he's so great.  He shows NO humility or self consciousness.  Everything he says is genius gold.  WHAT AN ASSHOLE.  Maybe his name is Rod Serling.  That's what google says.  I ain't buyin' it!
Rod Serling writes every other episode too.  WE GET IT YOU'RE GREAT.  Congratulations.  NOW EASE UP A BIT.  Anyway.  Got SNL to look forward to watching later!  Yep.  I get to look forward to watching it!  Maybe I'll watch it maybe I won't.  At some point though I will start to look forward to it.  Maybe a little bit later after this entry.  I wonder if they'll do Topical Humor.  My guess?  Probably!  I wonder if they'll do Tropical Humor.  My guess?  Anything's possible!  I'd live on a tropical island, sure.  I'd have to get used to eating Citrus Fruits.  I feel like that's a big part of your diet on Tropical Island.  I could get the hang of that, sure.  I could be WAY off.  Maybe NON citrus fruits.  Forget exactly what citrus fruits are and/or what fruits on tropical island are.  Either way I hope it's the GALAPAGOS island.  That way I'll live to be 200!  I MAY not be understanding how Galapagos Island Works.  I MAY have made that exact same joke before.  Oh well I enjoyed it anyway!
What else is going on.  NATE SILVER came in second in a World Series Of Poker Tournament.  And I got the impression he's playing in a bunch of them.  Where is Nate Silver getting all this money.  Sounds like a scam.  He should be busy making Mathematical Models not playing games!  And he shouldn't have that much money!  I smell a scam!  Or concurrent multiple scams!  Anyway.  I dunno.  I dunno why that's supposed to be funny.  Good counter-point.  It's not funny!  I don't get it either!  Oh well that's life.  Microsoft FrontPage doesn't recognize Nate as a word.  That's gotta be demoralizing to Nates everywhere.  Tough.  Hmm.  There's the famous Simpsons scene where they take famous people's names and make anagrams describing them.  Nate.  NEAT.  Now I'm smarter than Lisa!  Who couldn't even think of one!  I'M A SOLID 100% AHEAD OF HER WITH THIS ONE.  Well I feel like a real genius now oh boy do I.
Fourth paragraph.  Go ahead and spend 7 seconds looking at Silver and seeing if you can come up with an anagram of that.  I did it!  Well, 3 seconds.  I didn't last the whole seven seconds before giving up.  I gave up after 3!  I got THINGS to do I can't spend that extra four seconds wasted.  Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe I'm giving you too much credit to assume you'll try to spend seven seconds working on Silver.  Maybe I'm giving you too little credit.  Maybe I am giving you just the right amount of credit.  In which case I should become a banker!  Something to do with credit.  I may not know how banks and/or credits work!  That's another good job-- working on the credits of major motion pictures.  Having to decide the font and speed and order.  My spin on it would be doing interesting fonts.  Comic Sans off the top of my head is one way to go.  Fascinating.
Last paragraph before coffee!  Also last paragraph of the first 25% which is traditionally the most repetitive.  Based on the last few days at least.  I feel like I repeat myself a lot in these entries and it's all the more in the beginning of the entries.  At some point I get into a GROOVE and say HALFLY New Things.  How would World Series Of Poker respond to a competing casino hosting The Superbowl Of Poker.  My guess?  Look into a lawsuit.  Then determine they have no grounds.  Then make THEIR OWN Superbowl of Poker.  Then the other Superbowl of poker will look into a lawsuit.  Then determine they DO have grounds.  And So The World Keeps On Turning.  What else is going on.  Bankers have lots of money because that's where money lives.  At banks!  Only logical that if you're trying to think of the richest guy in town it'll be the guy in charge of the place where money lives!  Here come some coffee. 
What was I talking about.  Bankers.  Oh gotcha.  Whoever has the responsibility of being the bank in Monopoly probably should be getting a salary?  In Monopoly you pick one person to handle the money and whatnot.  He should be getting an extra 200 dollars every trip around the board or something!  Then again even without that he's getting the privilege of being able to cheat more easily.  So that's his reward for doing the work.  JUST LIKE REAL BANKERS.  I'm calling you out!  Anyway what else is going on.  Baseball playoffs have been going on.  I'm okay with that!  If the games want to be played and the players want to play them, it's all for the best!  Everyone wins in this scenario.  Except for the games that don't want to be played but MUST be played for symmetry with the games that do want to be played an dare played.  YEAH. 
     Seventh paragraph!  I don't believe it!  Seventh paragraph out of 10 is solidly in the middle mathematically but IN FEELING it feels like near the end.  Interesting.  That means nothing.  It means something to me!  That was the inspiration for saying it!  Fair enough.  Gonna have haircut tomorrow night.  It's gonna be a blast and a half.  It will be a solid chore but after 20-30 minutes it will be over and done with and I will look in the mirror and be like whose that handsome devil in the mirror.  Uh oh.  I see the devil in the mirror.  Behind me maybe?  He only shows up in the mirror!  Well at the very least he is handsome.  That sort of thing.  There was a The Twilight Zone episode with A LADY Devil.  Guy sells his soul to someone we assume is the devil because that's who you sell souls too AND she had Devil Horns.  And she was a lady!  SOCIAL PROGRESSIVENESS.  We've seen too much of Male Devils about time we had a Female Devil!
    Sure great what else.  Everyone talk all the time about Oh Maybe God Is A LADY.  Well if you want that you also gotta take The Devil being A Lady!  You can't pick and choose!  Get a load of all this talk about God being A LADY.  I don't know how to feel about that!  I'm all for Social Progressiveness but then again God Doesn't Exist At All so you can see my predicament in thinking about this Hot Button Issue.  Then again maybe ladies do not exist???  Now that I think about it can I really say for sure I'm positive ladies exist?  My Mom!  I see her all the time.  She's a lady.  That's evidence #1.  Is there a second piece of evidence?  Hmm.  Dunno!  Nothing conclusive off the top of my head.  What else is going on.  The Wrestle mania of Poker.  Is that a thing.  My guess?  NOT AS OF THIS MOMENT. 
     Ninth paragraph already!  And all I had to do was Say Nothing Worthwhile.  I dunno.  I feel like I've said FIVE .3 Worthwhile things.  NOT BAD.  NOT BAD AT ALL.  Hmm.  In The Devil Wears Prada... does that imply a Female Devil?  Can Men wear Prada?  Also What Is Prada?  Better LTURQ.  Looks like they do at least mostly stuff only for Females.  But POSSIBLE they have some stuff that could be for men!  The point is it at least IMPLIES a Female Devil if not GUARANTEEING it.  Anyway.  What else is going on.  How could Christians say God Is A Woman.  God impregnated a lady.  Ladies can't impregnate ladies!  Not biological ladies at least!  CHECK AND MATE.  Then again if Any Lady Could Impregnate A Lady it's presumably Lady God.  Lady God can do anything she wants, she's god.  Why not impregnate someone.  Hmm very interesting counter-point. 
Last paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  Put my underwear on backwards this morning.  I realized it right away!  Didn't correct it, though!  Figured well I'm gonna take a bath in 3 or 4 hours.  Gotta take em off then anyway.  Might as well just live with it backwards for a few hours.  Whose got the time to take them off and then put them back on now.  So I got that going for me.  SURE I've already have to urinate half a dozen times and I had  lower underwear a bit instead of using the flap.  That's life!  If I have to shit I can use the flap THAT WAY and suddenly I'm Coming Out On Top in this scenario!  Wonderful.  Maybe we should have flaps both ways in underwear.  That way We Can Never Get It Wrong and also that way We Can Pee And Poop Through Flaps At Once.  Well maybe not at once.  But you get the idea.  I'll be back in a little bit.


This Is The Same Thing As Before

    Well hello there!  Time to write some more paragraphs.  So far today is going okay!  Solidly Exactly The Same As Every Other Day.  I LIKE that.  I've been enjoying life relatively this Era Of My Life.  Solid 6, 6.5 out of 10 Life!  Anyway what else is going on.  I haven't said The First Thing that's going on.  Oh right.  Hmm.  Looking forward to watching SNL later today!  Maybe watch An Horror movie first was my first instinct.  Wanna be spooked a little bit after this entry.  Then I realized SNL is spooky enough!  HEY this is what AMERICA is watching these days.  Those are high stakes!  I'm anxious and worried for America.  So that's spooky!  So it's a best of both worlds or something.  What worlds.  Earth is presumably one world.  What's the other.  I dunno off the top of my head SATURN?  I'm a fan of Saturn.  Ring?  CHECK.  Moon that's possibly habitable?  CHECK.  SATURN?  CHECK!
     What else is going on.  I can't wait to see their sketch parodying Nate Silver sitting at a World Series Of Poker Final Table.  They're gonna get him good!  What else is going on. ...WAIT A SECOND.  Nate Silver came in 2nd.  Per his announcement on Twitter.  SILVER.  THIS JERK GOT THE SILVER.  Well don't that beat all!  I'd like to dwell on this some more but I have nothing to add!  Let's just soak it in for a few moments and when you're ready go on ahead and start reading the next sentence.  Got some oranged soda going.  Same as before!  Well slightly different.  I drank the liquid I had before and now I Replaced it with new liquid.  MOVING ON.  Desperately looking around the room for inspiration.  I tried looking around the corners of my mind but that got me nowhere.  Now I'm looking out into The Physical World.  No luck there either.  Hmm maybe starting a new paragraph will get the juices flowing!
     YEAH.  When was the last time a Major League player died halfway through a game.  That's what I came up with?  Looking a round for 5 or 10 minutes fruitlessly and then I come up with THAT?  I'm not happy about it either!  Then again it did get the ball rolling so let's see if we can keep the ball rolling.  Oh no the ball is rolling away from us.  We can't have that!  Better stop the ball from rolling so we can play with it some more.  If it rolls away too far at some point he ball ceases to be our ball. Hmm what's the math philosophy equation for How Far A Ball Has To Be Away From Us Where It Is No Longer Our Ball For All Intents And Purposes.  My guess?  TWENTY SIX FEET.  That's not an equation.  That's just a number.  YEAH YOU'D THINK SO WOULDN'T YOU.  What else is going on.  Oh right absolutely nothing.
Great!  Solidly into the 14th paragraph of the entry!  That Feels As Far as the 7th paragraph into the first 10 paragraphs yet is also as close to the middle as it was... also... too.. same thing times two... Huh.  Smelled a nice bagel while re-filling soda downstairs.  Toasted bagel!  You can't smell untoasted bagels.  Maybe you can.  Everything bagels.  Salt can be smelled even without being activated by cooking I feel.  And/or seeds of some sort.  Salt is seeds.  Salt Seeds.  Not sure what that accomplishes.  Either way what else is going on.  Untoasted isn't a word apparently.  Maybe nontoasted is a word.  Nope that's not a word either.  Maybe nevertoasted.  Nope.  There must be an antonym of Toasted!  Every word has an antonym.  For each word there's an equal and opposite word!  That's just SCIENCE.  Might have made that, "Joke," before.  Either that or the same joke but for something else.  I'm putting All My Money on FOR SOMETHING ELSE.  Wonderful this is the most worthwhile thing in MINUTES!
     Last paragraph of the act!  My Minutes.  Not your minutes.  My minutes goes back a paragraph or two.  For you, minutes can go back all the way to the beginning of the entry.  I have no idea how long it takes to read this If You're Actually Even Reading This.  Hmm.  Just happened to be reading an article about latest Atlanta-Milwaukee playoff game and the manager of the Atlanta Braves is named Brian Snitker.  STINKER.  Another easy anagram which describes someone.  STINKER.  Anyway glad we covered that.  It might not be funny but it's an important point to make nonetheless.  Hmm.  Not only is that an anagram but it's a funny word.  And/or concept!  Doesn't get much funnier than Stinking!  What else is going on.  I think Atlanta is a little too close to a palindrome for comfort.  Not sure what that means.  Either way I'm gonna take a bath now.  I'll be back in a little bit!



One Title After Another

    What's up friends.  Here to write the rest of the entry!  I have delicious Coke Zero going on right now and will compliment that with delicious Coffee Eighty afterwards.  Amount of cream is probably around 60 or 70 calories.  Coffee itself is what, like 5 or 10 calories?  So I got that going for me is the point.  I assume the Zero in Coke Zero refers to calories.  There might be Zero of other stuff, too!  SUGAR.  That's even more likely than calories!  Hmm what else does Coke Zero have Zero of.  Off the top of my head Citrus Tropical Island Fruits.  None of that at all!  I dunno there could easily be a splash of citrus in Coke Zero Formula.  Anyway.  I remember back in the day when Coke With Lemon was all the rage.  Do I?  Do I really?  I remember them making it.  I remember seeing commercials for it!  I might be overestimating how much society was on board with it, though.  Well it was exciting TO ME.  I feel like when I used to go out to eat for dinner with my parents Me Or Someone Else would get Coke with lemon.  This is so extravagant I'm getting the cola I'm used to BUT WITH A LEMON GARNISH?!?!  So the point is I Forget.
I might be overestimating how much Fat Free Cream I put in my coffee.  I also might be overestimating how much calories are in coffee itself.  I also might be overestimating how interesting this is to read.  Wait.  Nope.  I know the terrifying truth of how mediocre this is.  Whew that's a relief.  I wouldn't want to get too big for my britches!  Whatever those are.  Some kind of overalls or something would be my guess.  Better LTURQ.  Covers body from waist down.  Close enough for me!  I don't have to read any further than that!  Also I'm not 100% sure they're not thinking of PANTS.  They say britches but what they're describing are PANTS.  Ugh.  What else is going on.  I feel like Coca Cola still has a hidden secret formula recipe.  Not sure how they get away with that legally.  Shouldn't we know what we're consuming?  Seems like some government agency should be making sure they're not putting things in the soda like MSG off the top of my head.  Maybe it's top secret 99% of the time but they do let government testers in on it.  I hope so!  That's a best case scenario all around.  Especially for the government testers.  They can make A Pretty Penny selling those secrets to rival Cola Companies!!!
What else is going on.  Not sure what a pretty penny is.  All the pennies I've seen in my life are ugly.  What else is going on.  This is only the third paragraph of the act?  I was hoping it'd be the fourth!  But I guess that's too much to dream for!  One day I'll get to the fourth paragraph I'm sure.  I envy that day.  Huh.  That's not how things work!  I envy how things work.  Ugh.  HEY I got underwear on in the right direction.  So at the very least I got that going for me!  And that's how it'll stay for the rest of the day!  I don't anticipate having to take off my underwear for the rest of the day!  Then again you can never be too sure.  Dunno what would entail me having to take my underwear off but off the top of my head it sounds like it might be fun!  Whatever it is!  Could be a surprise best case scenario for how the day turns out!
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  HAH.  STINKER.  Brings me to the verge of presumably being somewhat amused.  Been a few weeks since you've known any of my meals.  Lunch or dinner meals at least.  May have mentioned a microbreakfast or two.  Either way suffice to say I've been having more or less the same meals as before.  MORE OR LESS.  That's all you're getting out of me!  What else is going on.  My Mom just made herself an egg!  Haven't seen that happen in months.  I had fun just watching it here and there while waiting for coffee to be microwaved up.  Didn't quite smell it-- wasn't quite deep enough into the process for it to smell.  But I hope she gets everything she wants to get out of this egg.  Yep.  That's what paragraphs are about.  This One at least.  Amazing.  Two MLB games going on today.  One of them the Astros are up in the series 2-0 and just need one win to win the series.  I'm was rooting AGAINST them HOWEVER I think I'm gonna root for them in this game because Let' Just Get It Settled And Over With.  I don't want this to last any longer I NEED CLOSURE IMMEDIATELY.
     That sort of thing.  I only have to write one more paragraph for today.  Wonderful!  You only have to read one more paragraph for today!  Amazing!  Unless you wanna read a Crazysheet Classic from 2017.  In which case hmm wonder how that might go.  I have no idea what this was like in 2017.  I don't even know what this was like last week.  To be fair I don't even know what this is like right now.  What else is going on.  Sure I'm recording Leprechaun Back 2 Tha Hood right now.  It's available on Demand somewhere-- they all are-- but I don't care enough to watch it on Demand.  I might care enough to watch it recorded from live TV.  Hmm maybe you'd think it'd be the other way around which one is easier.  Nope. You'd be wrong!  Easier to watch what Live TV suggested to me even though I have to record it and watch it later.  YEAH.  That'll do it for today.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:13 P.M.




Saturday, October 9, 2021

Look I'm Typing Things

    What's going on friends.  I am here writing the entry only TEN minutes after getting back from walk I instead of FIFTEEN minutes.  Normally I take a 15 minute break and lie down in phone and Catch Up On The Internet.  Today?  Phone battery was dangerously low!  Had to charge it and spend that amount of time checking internet on computer like an animal!  So of course I'm gonna cut that short.  Who needs it!  Either way that's all done now and we can get into the entry.  Sitting UP?  I JUST WOKE UP RELATIVELY.  I don't have the energy to sit up in a chair.  What am I SUPERMAN.  You know-- the guy famous for having energy?  Hmm gotta imagine there's one super hero whose main power is Lots Of Energy.  Hmm lots of ways I can add to that joke.  So many ways the all cancel each other out.  Better just end the paragraph here and play it safe!
     Anyway.  What else is going on friends.  Several baseball games occurred yesterday!  I'm okay with how they turned out.  It's not like I have a choice.  I can either be okay with them or not okay with them.  I choose to accept what life gives us.  Not quite sure how to deny it if I wanted to.  Kill myself, I guess.  That's the only real way to object to life off the top of my head.  Hmm.  If I kill myself gotta kill myself in a suspicious way that gets people wondering if I was murdered.  Imagine how great it would be to be murdered!  Someone really took the time out to end your life.  You must be a pretty important guy!  Well Done on being a great enough guy to get murdered!  Anyway yeah.  Also the person who murdered you may have to face consequences!  That'll learn 'em!  Anyway yeah.  I don't like this paragraph.  I don't like the first paragraph either.  Turns out I don't like most paragraphs.
What else is going on.  I get to watch the Christ Rock Saw Movie today.  Presumably.  I tried to record it from life TV.  I may or may not have succeeded!  I guess we'll have to wait and see.  SURE I have trouble recording stuff from live TV.  Harder than you'd think!  Gotta be some sort of computer genius to do this.  This is TV not computer.  Well if you were describing this to someone from 1994 they'd probably be like oh kind of like a computer TV.  Why do we have to go back to someone from 1994.  If you were describing this to me, in 2021, clearly, as I just said, I'd be like oh kind of like a computer TV.  That's how this entire thing started.  Me saying that!  THIS YEAR.  Which I'm PRETTY SURE is 2021.  YEAH.  Look it's Saturday.  Why should I wrote a good entry on Saturday.  Take it easy!  Both for myself and for you.  Reading something entertaining is too much work on your end.  I PRAY TO GOD that's the case.  No I don't.  I may never have prayed to God in my life.  COMPLAINED to God plenty of times.  Hey God WHAT THE FUCK this is BULLSHIT.  That happens all the time.
     Fourth paragraph.  The squeaky wheel gets the grease!  BERATED God.  A step beyond complaining.  YOU FUCKIN ASSHOLE HOW DARE YOU DO THIS TO ME!!!  That kind of stuff.  Probably talked about that before.  You don't forget a thing like talking about your relationship to God and/or No One But Your Imagination with other people.  Anyway what else is going on.  I feel like I've tried to make amends for being a Jerk to Imagination God when I was a kid.  Gotta make nice now otherwise afterlife would be awkward.  Makes sense.  Wait no it doesn't.  There is no God or afterlife.  Oh right now that I think about it THAT makes sense.  Okay glad we cleared that up.  Watched Killer Klowns From Outer Space over the last two days.  Ya know what?  SCARY FUCKIN' ALIEN CLOWNS.  I don't know why but those clowns creep me out possibly more than any Horror Things I've Seen in years.  WELL DONE!  I GUESS.
     I feel like my Brother was scared of clowns as a kid.  I don't think I was.  That's not part of family lore.  But it's also possible I Was just never exposed to a  clown!  You can't fear what you don't know!  Wait you MUST fear what you don't know.  That's part of society philosophy.  Either way I was busy scared of pigeons.  HORRIFYING.  I've talked about that before.  Everything I say I've talked about before.  Except for 50% of what I say.  I LIKE those odds.  I think the scariest thing I've seen in a circus type setting is in Batman Forever where Two Face kills Robin's Family.  Robin's family were acrobats.  Anyway it's scary because This Is A Terrible Movie And This Scene Is No Better Than The Rest Of The Movie As A Whole.  It's SCARY because it's A BAD FILM.  Hmm that seems to check out.  OH NO 80% of this entry is either Old Stuff or Nothing. And the other 20% is Both!!!
    HMM There's still 75% of the entry to go!  Of which 50% may be worthwhile!  Which makes 37.5% of the entry worthwhile!  Which rounds up to 40%.  WHICH ROUNDS UP TO 80%.  Hmm.  Anyway I got coffee going on right now.  No soda though!  Just finished my glass of soda.  And I just came up with coffee.  I can't go right back down.  What would people say!  Possibly Nothing.  I can't take that chance!  Anyway.  It's, "Killer Klowns From Outerspace," because the word, "Killer," starts with a, "K," so of course they're gonna want the second word, traditionally spelled, "Clowns," with a, "K," instead of a, "C."  Two word alliteration!  Of course they could have done Killer Klowns Krom Kouterspace which would have made more sense.  But I guess that didn't occur to them.  Oh well better late than never.  They still haven't done it.  But THEY STILL HAVE TIME.  Anyway what else is going on. 
     Of course they could have done, "Ciller Clowns From Outerspace."  But we can all agree, "K's," are more fun than, "C's."  I don't know if I agree with that.  What else is going on.  I've noticed a recurring theme of Home Crowd Fans being more supportive of Visiting Teams this year in playoffs.  And now that I think about it, this year before playoffs.  There's a solid amount of cheers every game I watch for opposing team doing good.  I blame this on the pandemic somehow.  Not sure WHY.  Maybe getting the vaccine is messing with people's minds!  Making them support the wrong team!  I KNEW I was wrong to take the vaccine.  And now I know why.  Hmm I've been rooting for The Mets all year.  UH OH Maybe I was a Philadelphia Phillie fan before this.  I can't remember anything from before the vaccine!  Oh No.
Eighth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Philadelphia Phillie Phan.  Sure.  I was just reminded I have NYU Sweatshirt Jacket.  That sounds like a blast and a half to wear.  If only I could locate it.  I MAY have put a tracking beacon inside it.  I can't remember.  Well that does me no good I don't know where the tracking beacon locator device is.  I need a tracking beacon on the thing which I press the button to track the original tracking beacon!  YEAH.  YEAH!  What else is going on.  Also it lets people know I'm a fan of NYU.  Which I am!  I solidly have a positive opinion of NYU.  It's a fun place even if you learn nothing there.  HEY maybe some people learn things there.  Seems possible.  You can learn things anywhere!  What else is going on.  I feel like after the fifth paragraph I continued this entry's tradition of saying stuff I've said before and/or are worthless.  Well if nothing else I'm Consistent.  Also Nothing Else.  All I Am Is Consistent!  Sounds fair.
What else is going on.  TRACKING BEACON?!?  I've never talked about tracking beacons before.  I think I'd remember that!  I also barely talked about hem now.  I just erroneously felt oh that's a fun combination of words.  Well that's that. Moving on!  Sure.  It's a SATURDAY.  Saturdays are for BREAKS.  I'm taking a break from writing entertaining things.  Makes sense to me.  Also I was TRAUMATIZED by hometown crowds rooting for the wrong team.  I can't Write Good under such trauma!  Jeez.  What else is going on.  Superman Writes Good, I want to write well.  What else is going on.  Feel like I've said, "What Else Is Going On," 12 times this half of a paragraph.  Well, three times.  Halfway there I guess.  What else is going on.  Been enjoying wearing some sweatshirt jackets.  Even if its a little warm for them outside!  I still get a blast and a half out of wearing 'em.  Also who cares one more paragraph to go!
     YEAH.  Sometimes it's good if the team you're not rooting for wins in Preliminary Rounds Of Playoffs so you have an easier decision to make when choosing who to root for for next round of playoffs.  YEAH.  MAKES SENSE.  Sure.  I'm rooting against the Houston Astros for example!  They cheated somehow a few years ago and HOW DARE THEM.  Something about stealing signs with the help of technology.  I think you're allowed to steal signs without technology.  Maybe not technically but it is a semi-legit part of the game.  But technology crosses the line!  That's what The Terminator was all about!  People developing robots to steal baseball pitcher signs and it crossing the line and whatnot.  Hmm.  Then again if any team is gonna be good with technology it should be the Astros.  THEY PUT A MAN ON THE MOON.  What technology has The Brewers ever accomplished.  Brewing Beer presumably?  I always assumed that's what they were brewing.  They could be brewing other beverages I guess.  Either way the Act is over!  Be back soon.




Getting Off To A Good Middle

    Hey.  Time to write some new stuff.  Probably not.  It'd be nice, though!  My Mom said she's ordering me a new sweatshirt jacket.  I believe she said it was black.  That's all I needed to hear?  Black?  That's stylish!  That's why Everything Is Always The New Black.  Because Black is the Standard Bearer for Greatness! More like I'm The Standard WEARER.  Good point!  Then again you can interpret the phrase the opposite way. Black is Ever Out Of Style And There Must Be A New Color To Replace It.  I dunno.  I feel like it's an honor and privilege that black was ever The Tops.  What else is going on.  Also it's good to wear black at night!  You might get hit by a car!  And I'm assuming you're suicidal.  That's just the vibe I get from you!  Yep that seems to check out possibly.  Anyway what else is going on. That's a good suspicious way to kill yourself.  Wear all black and go get hit by a car at night!  People would be none the wiser!
     Sure.  Then again you're causing lots of problems for the car.  Well, the driver, at least.  The car may get dented or something which isn't great.  But the car will survive!  The point is what else is going on.  My Dad has the day off for Indigenous Peoples' Day.  I assume the apostrophe comes after the, "S," when talking about what day it is.  Better LTURQ.  YEP IT DOES.  This might be only the second or third day in America History where there's an apostrophe after the, "S."  Off the top of my head it's this and Julys' Fourth.  Yep.  That was necessary to say.  We surely couldn't have done without That.  When people do Suicide Attacks on other people, what's the ratio of They Wanna Kill Others to They Wanna Kill Themselves.  I think we tend to focus on the people who want to kill others and in the process accept themselves dying.  HOWEVER gotta imagine there's another class who wanna kill themselves and are like well might as well go ahead and take others down with me.  Couldn't hurt.  I don't wanna give anyone ideas with that.  I'm just introducing a scholarly subject conversation!  Get off my back about it.
     Sure.  What else is going on.  Gonna have coffee with Act III.  I anticipate enjoying it!  That's usually how things go.  I can't wait to see if Christ Rock in The Saw Movie is more in line with the kind of performance he gave in Fargo than his kind of performance in past movies.  My guess?  YEP MORE IN LINE.  More of a serious role I'm guessing.  I guess we'll have to wait and see.  Probably wait a few days for it to be On Demand.  Because I'm gonna say there's a 75% chance I was unsuccessful at recording it from live TV.  The problem rests with My TV NOT ME.  It doesn't work half the time and trust me I'm Doing Everything Right!  PLEASE Believe Me!  Sure what else is going on.  Maybe the Milwaukee Brewers are brewing Coke Zero.  They'd probably be called The Milwaukee Coke Zeroes then.  Why.  I dunno!  I don't know lots of things these days.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act.  Any pressure on Atlanta Braves to change their name after Cleveland Indians had to?  I guess the reason they're escaping that is because HEY WE'RE SAYING THEY'RE BRAVE.  THAT'S A GOOD THING.  WHY WOULD YOU MAKE US CHANGE A COMPLIMENT.  Makes sense to me.  Wait no it doesn't. It makes no sense.  They should have to change their name too.  You heard it here first!  I feel like there's a triple A team in Columbus Ohio.  They should have to change their city.  Just to play it on the safe side.  Better LTURQ.  Columbus Clippers.  Triple A Team for The Indians.  This franchise team names are just going from bad to worse!!  Either way CLIPPERS?  I LOVE THAT NAME.  But we gotta get rid of the Columbus still.  Thems the breaks!  Anyway cleansing experience for the day is creeping up soon.  Amazing.  Of course the Columbus Clippers will have to move to a city starting with a, "Ka," sound.  For alliteration.  And ideally a, "C." For Letter Alliteration.  Huh.
Last paragraph of the act!  Off the top of my head maybe.. hmm... gimme a moment... CALGARY.  Sure why not go to Canada, they don't have indigenous peoples there so we DEFINITELY can't offend them.  Lots of things wrong with that sentence.  Roughly TWO.  Two is a lot for once sentence!  I guess.  What else is going on.  OH NO.  Calgary sounds too much like CAVALRY.  And in the wild wild west the cavalry were the arch nemesis' of The Indigenous peoples!  Maybe.  Possibly.  I feel like that's half right.  WOW HALF?  That rounds up to ALL.  Hey that's alright.  Moving on.  Oh.  I know.  CLEVELAND.  Cleveland Clippers.  Well that settles that.  Anyway.  There's minor league affiliates for both Yankees and Mets in NYC.  Different boroughs sure but the same city!  So it's not as crazy as it sounds.  Actually now it kind of sounds MORE crazy.  Not sure how or why.  Just a feeling I get!  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.




I Guess That'll Do It

    I was unsuccessful in my attempt to record The Saw Movie!  However it is now available on On Demand.  So that worked out I guess.  Took a bath.  I cleansed myself all over.  That's how I do it!  Been doing a lot of sit ups and push ups lately.  Lots!  Which is good because at some point it'll pay off somehow.  More likely to pay off somehow than if I wasn't doing it.  If I wasn't doing it there's no hope there'd be any sort of pay offs from doing its!  'Cremento Clippers.  They're in Sacramento now.  But it's abbreviated 'Cremento like it already usually is among residents of The 'Cremento.  I'd go to Sacramento to see a Triple A Baseball Team.  That's where Governor Newsom lives!  Presumably.  Are there tours of Governor's Mansions.  Also is there a Governor Mansion in every state?  And how come governors get to live in mansions?  So people would have INCENTIVE to want to be governor.  Oh Okay.
     Coffee time!  Gonna cut my hair with the help of my Dad tomorrow night or Monday night.  Should probably do it tomorrow night.  Cutting hair on Indigenous Peoples' Day is too reminiscent of scalping and that'd be insensitive to do on Indigenous Peoples' Day.  YEAH.  Look I know history.  We scalped them first!  I get it!  What else is going on!  I dunno.  Poured my coffee just now.  Well, 35 seconds ago.  Well, 1 and a half minutes ago.  Then put it in microwave after I poured it.  Even before coming up the stairs with it.  THIS IS GOOD STUFF.  I'm looking forward to cutting my hair.  I'm just getting to a point where I enjoy the length of my hair.  Pretty long but appropriately so!  WELL TIME TO CUT IT OFF.  Once you've reached Maximum Appreciation you only have downwards to go.  Might as well start anew completely!  YEAH.  Also I really need to shave.  Might as well cut my hair too.  YEAH.  Also I wonder what I look like with short hair and Not So Fat Face.  Been a while!  YEAH.
So I got all that going for me is the point.  Two baseball games tonight but not until Late Afternoon?!?!  That does me no good! ...UP until late afternoon, at least!  Look I got stuff to do already in the latter part of the day.  What I REALLY need is something to do NOW.  And by NOW I mean SOON.  So the point is... uh... I'm upset about the times of baseball games today.  That's the point!  Good point, too!  Important and insightful and relatable.  I think we're all on board with the point I'm making this paragraph.  IF I LIVED IN 'CRAMENTO I'D HAVE A BASEBALL GAME TO WATCH AT 2:07 IN THE AFTERNOON.  GREAT.  Another reason I'm upset I don't live in The 'Cramento.  These reasons are piling up!  It's about time I make concrete steps to look into moving to Sacramento.  Eh maybe later.  I'll look into it later!
     No I won't.  Interesting counter-point.  Penultimate paragraph!  I assume the main industry in Sacramento is upholding the Governor's Mansion.  Either that or something else I dunno what do I know.  Great.  I think as a kid I was angry at State Capitols that weren't the most well known and/or populous city in the state.  Not sure why it upset me.  Maybe part of it was It's Harder To Remember For State Capitol Tests.  And of course part of it was That's Just DUMB Make the capital the main city Don't Be DUMB.  But now that I'm older, I GET IT.  The governor wants some room to breathe without people bothering him all the time!  Locate Governor's Mansion and thus Capitol City somewhere a little bit out of the way.  I understand it!  One day I'm gonna look up whether it's Capital or Capitol.  I must be capitol because it is definitely a word and I don't know where else it would be used.  Then again Capital just FEELS right on the tongue.  I looked it up.  It's CAPITAL.  Which felt right!  So I was wrong but my Feelings Were Right.  But then What's Capitol.  Refers to Government buildings IN THE CAPITAL.  Wha... Huh...  this is needlessly confusing!  Maybe you're not confused.  But I AM.  Get off my back about it.
Last paragraph of the day!  I don't believe it!  Capitalism is the study of state capitals.  Moving on.  Gonna have a nice solid 45 minute to an hour break between Entry and Next Walk.  I can accomplish a lot in that time period.  I won't!  But I technically could.  So I got that going for me.  Maybe if it's available I should get New Xbox in a month or two.  I need a new phase of life after Dieting.  Playing Video Games sounds like a great way to go.  It's EASY.  It's FUN.  It's PRODUCTIVE.  Then again the odds are it won't be easy to get in the next month or two!  Which is for the best because video games aren't productive like I just lied they were.  They also aren't that much fun in the end.  Also they may be hard!  The point is I gotta start a new phase of life in two or three months and presumably it should revolve around something productive somehow.  Hmm gonna have to think about this one.  I'll be back here tomorrow though at least!

-12:47 P.M.




Friday, October 8, 2021

There Must Be More Titles

    Hello friends.  I'm here again!  AMAZING.  Waiting on a Super market delivery.  Could come before I finish Act I!  Could come after I finish Act I!  Could come WHEN I finish Act I!  And I suppose Could Never Come would round out all the possibilities.  I can't wait to get SODAES.  They taste like water but with certain flavors.  Also they're bubbly which I get a real kick out of.  Also I fee like they're partly refrigerated while in Super Market Delivery Truck To Remember.  When I drive them home from super market they're room temperature!  Both IN STORE and IN TRANSIT.  This way?  Already kind of cold!  I can drink it immediately!  This is the greatest news I've heard since I first heard this news whenever that was.  HEY yesterday both my picks for Playoff Rooting For won.  By which I mean one of them won and the other one lost.  By which I mean the one that won I may be changing my mind and rooting for the team that lost.  Either way though what a night for baseball.
Great!  Not a single thing in that paragraph!  But now that we got Nothings out of the way the only thing we have time left for is Somethings.  Nothings is a word.  Somethings isn't.  That's a good recurring topic.  Words that aren't words that should be words.  And by good I mean nothing.  Maybe I can start my own dictionary.  Not to replace current dictionaries but to supplement them.  I think people would get a kick out of being able to use new words.  And/or having the words they've been using that aren't in original dictionary validated.  Hmm not a bad idea.  Wait let me correct that.  Hmm a bad idea.  There we go that's more accurate.  Uh oh we're mostly through paragraph two and again we haven't said a worthwhile thing.  Hmm.  Still got time to rectify that!  Have you heard the good news about... uhh... Oh I Know.  One of the two teams I Was Rooting For yesterday won!  That's good for all of us.  When I'M happy it has a trickle down effect to the rest of the world.
     I feel like Reagan or whoever could have come up with a better phrase than Trickle Down Economics.  I mean I guess it fooled enough people anyway.  But Money TRICKLING DOWN isn't the best choice of words if you're trying to make it sound appealing.  To those who presumably benefit from The Trickle.  But what do I know!  Not a lot!  I barely know the things I think I know let alone knowing things I don't think I know.  Hmm.  TRICKLE DOWN ECONOMICS?  More Like You're Trying To TRICK..'ll... US.  IT'S A TRICK IS THE POINT.  Anyway what else is going on.  Is Trickle even a word.  After typing trickle 20 times, at this point it just sounds like nonsense sounds.  Yep it's a word.  It might not mean what I think it means.  It might just be the name of a character in a Charles Dickens book.  That's my second guess for what it means.  I've talked about trickle down being dumb way to put it before.  I'll talk about it again!  Also Trickle Down is a dumb theory.  Only makes sense you put it a dumb way too.  Makes sense.
     Charles Dickens?  More like DARLES CHICKENS.  Gottem.  Hello Mr. Trickle.  That sort of thing.  That's the most interesting dialogue I can come up with to mimic Charles Dickens cleverly.  HELLO Mr. Trickle.  Amazing.  I'm a great choice to take over for Charles Dickens after he dies.  Whenever that may be.  In the future.  Still rooting for White Sox over Astros.  Frank, "The Big Hurt, "Thomas was doing the pre-show for that game!  He was a fan of The White Sox.  Pot committed at this point to them I guess.  Anyway I might root for Red Sox over Tampa Bay Devil Rays.  I Don't KNOW.  This is a tough one!  To be honest, I think my most consistent impression is to Root For Interesting And Competitive Games and/or complete series.  Just watch the game and enjoy an interesting exciting and engaging game.  Doesn't necessarily means I have to be happy for one team and upset for the other team.  YEAH that sounds like a BIG BOY way to Appreciate Sport.  WOW BIG BOY?  ME?  This is great news I thought I was small.
     Hey coffee after this paragraph!  I don't believe it.  Also I feel like I'm a low enough weight that I could call myself small.  When I was 5'2 and 170 pounds I'm big!  40 pounds less and I'm small!  Wonderful.  Nice compact deal going on.  Efficient!  What else is going on.  Apparently it would be bad for Sportsbooks if Giants win world series.  Because they were giving out great odds before and during the season.  Hmm I like the idea of rooting against Big Sportsbook.  Then again that might also imply I'm rooting against The Mafia running numbers.  Does The Mafia still do that?  Of Course Not The Mafia Doesn't Exist.  That's my official position.  Don't wanna step on anyone's toes.  Better just leave that topic alone completely.  What else is going on.  That's what running numbers means, right?  Gamblings?  Better LTURQ.  Oh.  Illegal lottery game.  I was halfway there.  Well maybe more like 40% there.  Either way that's life.
     Hey I got coffee!
  That's good.  But honestly I'd be more, "Into," having soda right now.  Coffee is good though!  Don't get me wrong!  Get me right!  That's what my intention is for you re: how to get me most of the time.  Anyway.  Woke up a big earlier than usual today.  So I could solidly get in Act I before delivery PROBABLY.  Still possible I won't but it's more likely than if I woke up later.  YEP that makes sense.  Tons of sense!  I can't wait to find out who new Mets Manager and new Mets General Manager will be.  Also presumably who Mets Specific Manager will be.  Cover all the bases.  I hope it's people I've relatively heard of.  Wow someone whose name I recognize?  This is great!  That's how I would feel.  Maybe the Mets can go with a Manager By Committee.  Every week you pick a new player to be a manager.  I think there's 26 people rosters.  Are there 26 weeks in a School Year?  By which I mean Baseball Year?  My guess?  Yeah probably.  Let's LTURQ.  TWENTY SIX AND A HALF WEEKS?!?!  Well that's all well and good but what the Hell do we go about that bonus half a week.  No manager.  Free For All!  WOW sounds like it'll be a Real Interesting Three Or Four Days!
     What else is going on.  Seventh paragraph!  I'd rather Super market come before Act I is finished than having to wait 2 hours.  Which would mess up my Walking Game.  Also not sure what to do.  I already watched most things in the world that I would probably find interesting.  Stuff that's been made up to now, at least.  Lots of stuff to watch in the future one would imagine.  Hmm.  Gonna have to look into that one.  It's possible everything made and/or released from this point on will be worthless.  Guess we'll have to wait and see.  Wonderful.  Watched episode III of The Blunder Years.  Okay stuff!  I liked most of it.  Some of it ENRAGED ME.  But most of it was good enough.  Hmm what part enraged me.  Oh I know.  They had several Quick Cut Away Jokes.  I feel like I've had enough of that kind of stuff from sitcoms.  I expected better from The Blunder Years!  But besides that Decent!
     Eighth paragraph.  I could be watching MLB Playoffs All Day.  But probably I should figure out something better to do.  I COULD be minimally entertained by having it on all day but I feel like I can AND SHOULD do better for myself.  Maybe if this was Elimination Winner Take All Games I could justify watching all day.  Who do I have to justify what I'm watching on TV to.  I dunno.  You?  That's my best guess off the top of my head.  Maybe I should root against San Francisco so that Sportsbooks Come Out On Top.  Maybe I wanna be making friends with Sportsbooks.  Why not.  Couldn't hurt to have a powerful friend like Big Sportsbooks in my corner.  Why would they be in my corner just because I Was Rooting Against A Baseball Team.  I dunno couldn't hurt them to be in my corner.  That checks out!  It All Checks Out!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Wonderful!  There was an article I read a few days ago that The Mets are gonna Blow Up The Team.  Really mix things up.  I LIKE that.  I like a lot of players on the team and hope they come back.  But then again Mixing Things Up is fun!  I wanna see some Mix-em-ups sure Hit Me With 'Em!  What else is going on.  I played a single song yesterday on Rocksmith!  Now we're talking!  Gettin' pretty difficult for me.  I usually get songs at around 85-90% accuracy.  DECENT but I'm never gonna become a professional musician missing 1 out of 10 notes!  Also I will never become a professional musician either way.  Just not in the cards!  Hey that's part of life.  I'd settle for being a Professional Anything.  Wow I'm a professor?  This is great news!  What else is going on.  Took Old Synthroid today.  Could have either taken Old Dose Brand Name or New Generic But Updated Dose.  I made my decision and I stand by it!  Oh no I'm getting weak.  Can't stand anymore!  I have to omuch synthroid in my system!
Whatever.  I feel like I have more underwear than I used to have.  I just noticed this.  I haven't gotten any new underwear in 2 or 3 years.  Just occurred to me, though!  Hmm got a surplus of underwear.  Not because I've lost weight.  There's no pair that's New To Me because of this.  If anything I'm down a pair or two that are too loose now!  Oh well I guess we'll never get to the bottom of this.  Yes we will.  I already have in my head!  I have the same amount of underwear I've had for years but for whatever reason I just noticed it's more than enough.  AMAZING.  Act I is already over?  I feel like if I had to guess I've said 0-6 Worthwhile things.  Could be zero.  Could be six!  Also I'd HAPPILY split the difference and have 3 worthwhile things.  I'd take that compromise in a second!  Anyway I'll be back a little bit later.




I Think This Speaks For Itself

    Hey!  Had to wait 45 minutes after Act I for Super Market Delivery to arrive.  Could have been worse!  Didn't muck up my daily schedule at all.  Also now I have SODA.  I had to think long and hard about which back-up soda I should have in the fridge first.  Gotta have a Coke Zero and a Supplementary Soda at all times.  I went with ORANGE.  Sure Lemon Lime is delicious but for now I think I'm in the mood for orange.  In fact I know I'm in the mood for it!  I'm drinking it right now!  DELICIOUS.  Anyway another Weekly Chore Down.  Won't have to spend 15 minutes putting stuff away for a solid AN ENTIRE WEEK.  In the meantime though let's see if I can think of 1.5 worthwhile things to say this act.  That's the goal I set for myself In Entry.  .3 Worthwhile Things Per Paragraph!  Not too big a goal, not too little!
     What else is going on.  When you score goals in sports it's The Conclusion.  Your goal should be What You Set Out To Do.  Once you've reached A Goal you've just accomplished something.  For hockey for instance when you're passing around the puck back and forth to yourself and going across the arena to the other team's net, the color commentator can say This player has THE GOAL of ultimately getting the puck in the net.  And then if he gets the puck past the goalie into the net, the Color Commentator goes WHAT AN ACCOMPLISHMENT!  I feel very strongly about this.  Anyway what else is going on.  I hope I can be a color commentator one day.  BLUE.  GREEN.  RED.  BACK TO BLUE.  Captivating.  Never liked crayons as a kid.  More of a colored pencil guy!  Go figure.  Markers are okay too.  But crayons are the worst!  Let's talk about it.  We just did.  Oh, okay.  Moving on.
Third paragraph of the act.  Also has there been ANY Real Art that's in crayons?  There must be SOME museum somewhere for Crayon Modern Art.  But I can't think of any important pieces off the top of my head!  And I know Art.  I can DEFINITELY think of more than 2 pieces of art off the top of my head.  There's THE SCREAM.  There's THE STARRY STARRY NIGHT.  There's... uhh... c'mon A THIRD THING.  OH The Salvador Dali with the melting clock.  THERE more than 2 pieces of art.  I'm some kind of genius.  Anyway yeah no one over 8 uses crayons.  I FEEL KIDS USE CRAYONS UP TO TEN.  Yeah DUMB KIDS maybe.  YEAH.  I put those kids in their place.  That'll learn 'em.  Got one or two more bottles of soda this week compared to last week.  That'll learn 'em.  Also we're supposed to be excited about bigger boxes of crayons? Oh I got 96 colors you only have 12.  KEEP IT SIMPLE.  You don't need 96 colors.  You barely need SIXTY colors.  Huh.
     Wonderful.  Cleansing experience is creeping up very quickly!  I'm gonna have a blast and a half I guess.  How permanent is crayon.  I feel like you can rub off some crayon pretty easily.  But not SUPER easily.  I'd test this out but Guess What No Crayons.  Also Guess What I Wouldn't Anyway I Don't Care Enough.  Well that'll do it then.  Are crayons wax.  That'd be my first guess.  Apparently.  Let's LTURQ.  And while we're at it LURQ how permanent are crayons.  A) Crayons are Wax.  B) "Crayons can fade over long periods of time."  Wow better than I thought.  That implies they don't fade over a MIDLENGTH period of time.  But that might only be All Things Being Equal.  I feel if some jerk took something you drew in crayon 2 hours ago and wanted to destroy it he could wipe it off pretty good.  So watch out for jerks is the point.  If you want your crayon art to last.
Last paragraph of the Act.  I have strong feelings on Sharpie.  Wait no I don't.  Moving on.  Solid chance I spend a lot of Upcoming Day (and next 2 weeks?) watching Baseball.  We'll see how much it keeps my attention.  So far SOMEWHAT.  Anyway how much of what Color Commentators say are being fed to them.  20%?  ALL OF IT?  Gotta imagine that some of it they're being prompted to read and/or repeat.  Oh well guess we'll never know.  Maybe we'll find out at some point.  Some sort of whistleblower giving away trade secrets or something.  I don't know!  We'll have to wait and see.  THERE'S NO WAY THAT TWO PEOPLE COULD COME UP WITH ALL THAT STUFF TO SAY.  THERE MUST BE 50 PEOPLE IN A ROOM WORKING ON THIS LIVE COMMENTARY.  That's how I feel.  Anyway hey the act is over!  I'll be back in a little bit.




I Like Those Odds

    Hey!  Time to wrap up the entry.  Got soda going-- Coca Cola Zero!  LOOK was I so sold on Coke Zero that I had to change from Pepsi to Coke?  NO!!!  Not because of the taste completely!  Also realized I was getting scammed 6 pack of Diet Pepsi 2 liters and paying for the 8 pack of Coke Zero 2 liters is more cost efficient!  The taste is different but I dunno if I'd have made the switch otherwise!  YEAH.  Good stuff!  I changed sodas NOT FOR TASTE BUT FOR PERSONAL FINANCE.  Go figure.  I never thought I'd Sell Out so much that I'm possibly getting a different soda that I'd want just because it's cheaper.  That's not selling out.  That has nothing to do with selling out.  If anything it's selling in!!!  Wait, No.  Not Selling In either.  The point is Selling Out is a completely irrelevant phrase to this situation.  Hmm what phrase would be relevant.  Get off my back about it!
     What else is going on.  Got coffee going on.  That's relevant to this situation!  Anyway WOW so much of a day left over where I can spend lots of time re-calibrating.  Maybe spend the entire day re-calibrating!  What would I be calibrating... Re-...  I guess tomorrow.  I'd re-calibrate what I should do tomorrow!  Sounds fun.  I think I can double task Watching Baseball & Calibrating even.  That sounds fun AND/or productive!  Anyway.  What else is going on.  Like some nice colored pens.  A nice standard pen-- not expensive, just regular-- but it's in Red or Blue.  This is good stuff.  RELATABLE.  Who doesn't like a blue pen?  TEACHERS.  Black ink or nothing!  That's what teachers say.  Maybe.  They'd be against red ink at least.  HEY I'M SUPPOSED TO WRITE IN RED.  THIS KID IS STEALING MY THUNDER.  Also Blue I think is too much.  THIS KID IS WRITING IN BLUE?  WHAT HE THINKS HE'S SPECIAL?  ZERO STARS.  Also this teacher is grading your papers on a rubric of stars apparently.  Go figure.
What else is going on.  Got the 40 calorie fudge pops.  No 40 calorie fruit flavor pops!  We have to make tough decisions in life as adults.  Presumably.  So far this is the toughest decision I've had to make.  So so far I'm actually coasting pretty easily all in all!  What else is going on.  I know what's on everyone's mind-- how big will my upcoming break be between Entry and Next Walk.  Right now?  Looks like between 30-45 minutes.  Nice solid break.  I can accomplish a lot in that amount of time.  Presumably there's some sort of Sports Center I could watch if they're talking about baseball.  Or I can watch it when they talk about another sport.  I don't know anything about any other sports but this is a great opportunity to get the ball rolling so to speak.  Gotta start somewhere.  Today 10/8/21 12:30-1:30 PM Sports Center On ESPN 2 may be the starting point!  Wow exciting feels kind of momentous.
     Penultimate paragraph! They're THE CENTER for Sports.  WOW I'm sold!  What else is going on.  I think Sports Center should have a spin off Sports Centre.  And it's the same thing.  Huh.  Not sure what that accomplished.  Not much is my impression!  What else is going on.  If I was a teacher I'd grade every test in Yellow and write at the top of everyone's test SORRY RAN OUT OF RED.  And I'd do that every test and/or paper!  No I wouldn't.  Interesting counter-point.  Ugh.  It just occurred to me how weird it was to have markers for mid-to-late elementary students that were special smelling markers.  You use them as markets but they're fun too because you can smell them.  WHAT THE HELL.  WHY ARE WE DOING THIS.  Was there someone somewhere who was like I'm worried kids aren't sniffing enough markers.  We need to do better!   Anyway, there was a google question and answer Is it bad to smell scented markers and the answer was sometimes yes.  WHA... Bu.... HU....  !!!
Well that's that.  Last paragraph of the day!  Are there kids who don't like art and are like well I'd use color markers but if they don't smell like anything why even bother.  What else is going on.  I guess.  Also gotta imagine ~40% of kids who enjoy smelling markers will take the next logical step and taste them.  Because ~40% of kids are DUMB.  But we can't entirely blame them!  We only have ourselves to blame!!  And partly them!!  They are kind of dumb and it is KIND OF their fault!!  Anyway what else is going on.  Baseball game will be in the cards after I get back from walk!  Maybe 10 or 15 minutes after I get back but more or less!  Amazing SOMETHING.  I was worried I'd have Absolutely Nothing to do.  Turns out it's only EIGHTY PERCENT Nothing.  20% something???  I can work with that!  Great just great.  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:57 P.M.




Thursday, October 7, 2021

What's Everyone Talking About

    Hey friends!  Time to do Stuff.  Got coffee a-brewin'!  Good story.  Now it's time for another story!  Hmm what kind of stories do I got going on.  Why there's The Story Of Me Having Coffee A-Brewin!  Wait a second I already told that story.  Maybe I have more details now.  Hmm.  My Mom had made herself coffee earlier!  So coffee pot was still kind of warm when I started it!  Hmm.  Also another consequence was I made slightly less coffee because she won't need a cup for herself.  HMM.  Also I had to throw out the filter leftover from her cup.  HM!M!M!M!  Okay time to move on with our lives.  The Dodgers beat the Cardinals in Wild Card Game yesterday!  I'm happy.  I realized one inning into the game I was rooting for The Dodgers because they had one of the two best seasons in the Major League Baseball and for them to get eliminated in a 1 game wild card wouldn't be fair at all.  I root for FAIRNESS.  Except for SOMETIMES.
     The point is sure I went to bed in the sixth inning.  I got THINGS TO DO.  Like Be Asleep.  That's the main chore I have these days.  Then again there's also the chore of Being Awake.  Also HMM.  Got blood results from Endocrine Appointment yesterday!  Most noticeable result was some sort of Thyroid Result which made Doctor say I can move from taking a .075 dose of Synthroid to a .05 dose. HOLY SHIT.  I'M GOING DOWN IN MEDICATIONS.  I'm HEALTHIER now than before.  And you all doubted me.  Then again yeah I don't get to binge on these Synthroids at a .075 dose anymore.  It was fun while it lasted!  But in the end I feel it's a positive thing.  Not 100% what synthroid is.  I know it treats my underactive thyroid.  Or my overactive thyroid.  It treats one of my thyroids.  Great.  Overactive is a word.  Underactive isn't!  I'd write an angry letter to someone about it but I'm scared I'd use even more words that aren't words that should be words. I've talked about underactive not being a word at least six times here.  Oh well Not My Fault it keeps coming up!  KIND OF is.  If I didn't have an underactive thyroid it wouldn't come up so often!
     Anyway.  How can overactive be wrong re: Thyroids Working.  It's getting the job done AND THEN SOME.  You wouldn't fire someone for being too productive in a job.  Why are you worried about my overactive thyroid if anything I'm the healthiest person around.  Re: Thyroid Production.  Whatever.  Cholesterol is HEALTHY.  A little TOO healthy.  Wait, no.  Scratch that!  Appropriately healthy.  Again high cholesterol sounds like a good thing too!  Now for the future I can have less cholesterol because I already have a surplus now.  Can't hurt to be over prepared for the future.  I don't know what that means.  I don't know what cholesterol means!  Something about fat in the blood.  That's my guess off the top of my head.  Let's LTURQ.  Fat-like substance found in the cells in your body.  Well I was 60% accurate.  More accurate than you!  You didn't even offer a single hypothesis!  You're useless to me!
     What else is going on.  Nothing good in this entry so far.  Three paragraphs.  Not a single thing!  Then again that's not so unreasonable.  Three paragraphs is nothing in the large scheme of things.  In the normal human life, we go through roughly Three HUNDRED paragraphs.  So this entry so far is 1% of our paragraph intake AT MOST.  Possibly even less!  Ugh.  Hey how's New York Marijuana Legalization To Remember coming along.  Let's LTURQ.  It's still coming along.  WOW.  I would have thought at this point they'd have changed their mind.  That's marijuana users for ya!  Always changing their minds!  Also gotta imagine they were HIGH when they came up with this legalization thing!  This idea is WAY OUT THERE.  I LIKE IT.  Anyway what else is going on.  Not enough soda and/or snapple to last me comfortably until Super market re-up 24 hours from now.  Hey that's life whatever.
     Cool.!  Here's Michael's Picks on who to root for in today's baseball games.  White Sox over Astros and Devil Rays over Boston.  YOU HEARD IT HERE FIRST.  Maybe you heard it somewhere else first.  I came up with it myself, though.  I didn't hear it somewhere else first.  Maybe I did and I forget.  That's possible.  VERY possible.  What else is going on.  I feel like American League is more patriotic than National league.  They both refer to America-- PRESUMABLY.  We know America means America.  We ASSUME National means The Nation Of America-- but maybe it doesn't!  There's plenty of other nations out there that National League could COVERTLY be referring to!  Oh no I'm scared.  Also American league has Designated Hitter while National League doesn't.  I feel the Designated Hitter is an AMERICAN way to go about things.  Having pitchers hit is OTHER WORLDLY.  I mean-- other parts of the world...ly.  You get it! 
     This entry is relevant.  Nobody knew what cholesterol is!  And we still don't!  But we know a little bit more than we did before.  And that's all anyone can ever really ask for.  If they don't want to ask for too much.  Nobody wants to ask for so much that they don't get it.  That would be upsetting!!  Huh.  Today is Thursday huh.  I can live with that.  Solidly in the top 100% of days.  Probably.  Maybe there's more days than I'm taking into account and they're all better than Thursdays.  The point is I have coffee with me and I'm having a blast and a half with it.  I think it's a gyp with the Winner-Take-All Wildcard games.  First two games of the post season are very exciting!  Whoever wins advances.  Then we go to best of 5 games.  Which means the first two games AT LEAST no one can be eliminated.  We were SPOILED with Ultimate Games in wild card.  We can't go back to Winning A Series.  You heard it here first.
Probably!  It's a great point and you may have never heard it anywhere!  ROYALTIES PLEASE.  What royalties.  Whenever you pay it forward and make that point to three friends.  I get royalties on the ads you sell while having that conversation.  Hmm.  Seventh paragraph!  I'd watch Pay It Forward again sure.  I'd watch lots of movies again.  Has Kevin Spacey been un-cancelled yet.  Better LTURQ.  He's in some Italian movie.  Good for him.  I guess Italians don't care about Whatever He Did Wrong.  I wanna say Sexual Misconduct.  I dunno what level.  My guess is he reached an 8 out of 10 level of Sexual Misconduct.  Very High.  Better LTURQ.  Groped young men.  I dunno that's easily an 8.5 if not higher.  Not a 10.  Look it's tough to get a perfect 10!  The point is what else is going on.  Also when they say young men I think they mean under 18.  Which is a strange way of putting it!  I'd CANCEL THEM just for calling under 18 year old boys young men.  CANCELLED WIKIPEDIA.  You're Gone!
    Eighth paragraph.  Baseball games tonight are on FS1.  Solid 50% chance I get that on my TV.  Only one way to find out!  UNTRUE.  There's roughly HALF A DOZEN ways to find out.  Actually MILLIONS.  I can go to each person in the world and ask them.  Billions even!  That's how many people there are.  Ugh.  I'm gonna start at the top and find the CEO of FS1 and see what he has to say.  The point is I'm getting relatively deep into the entry and I'm happy about it!  Not a great entry so far, but you can't argue with It Being The Same Amount Of Paragraphs Eventually As Every Other Entry.  What else is going on.  I believe I can watch The Black Widow on Disneyplus as of today!  I like Marvel Movies.  I watched them last year during Pandemic Quarantine!  I had a Marvel Summer To Remember!  And I DO remember it!  Mission accomplished I guess!
     What else is going on.  Appears I can't get 40 calorie Fudge Pops from Super Market this week.  Only 40 calorie Fruit Flavor Pops.  I can live with that!  It's a back-up, sure.  Not ideal.  But all in all not so bad.  YEAH.  They're not playing today, but let's see what Michael's Picks are for who to root for in National League series.  HMM I Don't KNOW.  Atlanta Braves vs Milwaukee Brewers.  Normally Braves are considered one of The Mets' arch-enemies, but for whatever reason, I kind of like them This Year At Least.  And for some reason Milwaukee The City just rubs me the wrong way.  So for now I DON'T KNOW.  San Francisco Giants versus Los Angeles Dodgers?  Again I DON'T KNOW.  I'm gonna have to see how much I like the home town fans in each series Game One.  I'll keep you updated on this situation as it progresses.
     WHY.  Nothin' better to do.  OH OKAY.  I think Kevin Spacey should write An Apology Op-Ed and he should say Sorry I SPACED OUT THERE for a minute.  I wasn't myself all those times I Did Bad.  Dunno what that accomplishes.  Did I really wanna say SPACED OUT that much that I had to go through that entire two sentences?  I dunno I guess I did.  That's life.  Been a solid week since last time I checked my weight.  I'm transitioning to only checking it once a month, though.  Next time will be October 1st!  Wait no that was last time.  Next time will be November 1st!  Yep that's more accurate than the first thing I said.  The point is Great Just Great.  Also Endocrine Doctor went out of the way to say EXCELLENT under my Vitamin D results.  Several hundred individual results she could be enthusiastic about.  For some reason she's PUMPED about my Vitamin D.  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit. 




Nobody Tells Me Nothin

    Whatever.  I think I'm gonna be a standard Mets fan and root for Brewers over the Braves.  Now that I think about it, that's a relatively easy decision to make.  Screw the Braves!  Also Dodgers over Giants for me!  I feel like Mets replaced both Brooklyn Dodgers and NY Giants so it makes sense to root for either one of them based on that.  But Dodgers more!  I'm basing this on my Dad being a Dodger fan before The Mets.  I base most things on Family.  I'm a family oriented kind of guy!  That sort of thing!  Anyway what else is going on.  I got the generic version of Synthroid instead of the brand name-- Synthroid-- in the mail and this is a big problem apparently.  My parents are a-upset about this!  Oh well what can ya do.  Force me to call Endocrine Office to see what's up.  Yep that's what they did.  I'm okay with it!  I want brand name too!  Only The Best For Me!
     Amazing.  Cleansing experience in four paragraphs.  I can, "Dig," that!  Hey Indigenous Peoples day must be coming up in a week or so.  Better LTURQ.  Upcoming Monday!  It's about time.  I haven't celebrated Indigenous Peoples in at least a few weeks!  Wait that's not right.  I feel like I celebrated them as recently as last week.  And by celebrate them I mean make the pun, "In Diggin' Us' People."  That's my way of celebrating something or someone.  Get off my back about it.  I feel like I don't have any sort of rankings in my head of Best To Worst Indigenous Tribes.  Look all Indigenous people are special.  All tribes are great.  But gotta imagine some are greater than others!  That's just Math!  Gonna have to look into that one day.  Not today though.  Too busy Not Doing That.  Also gotta imagine SOME tribes were jerks!  I hate to say it!  But if there's dozens or scores or hundreds of relatively big tribes, SOME OF THEM are gonna be jerks. 
     What else is going on.  Aztecs off the top of my head.  So much human sacrifice!  Jerks!  What else is going on.  Baseball playoff game this afternoon!  The game in which I will root for The White Sox.  I forget why.  Maybe because of Frank Thomas.  He played for The White Sox.  Nice power hitting DH in the 1990's.  HOF'er!  HOF means Hall Of Fame.  I don't have time to write Hall Of Fame so I said HOF for conveniency's sake.  What else is going on.  LOOK did Frank Thomas play a lot of his career at First Base?  Possibly!  I wouldn't put it past him.  Better LTURQ.  In Career, he played 971 games at first and 1310 at DH.  Good for him!  More of a Position Player than I initially gave him credit for!  But still solidly a DH.  So I was RIGHT but Not AS Right.  And in the end that's what matters in website.  HOW RIGHT WAS I.  Amusing or entertaining or thought provoking aside... how right was I?  My guess?  I'm usually about 60, 70% right!  Not Bad!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Hmm.  GIANTS?  I'm a small person.  Giants are my natural enemy?  Why would I root for giants when I can root for Dodgers.  I dunno what they're dodging but I LIKE it.  So that settles that I guess.  Dodgers all the way!  For this 5 game series.  Then re-calibrate if they win and advance to next series.  What else is going on.  Did I mention I don't have enough soda to last me today comfortably?  Probably!  It's very upsetting.  I don't know how to feel about this!  Wait yes I do.  I just said it!  I'm upset about it.  Yeah but I don't know HOW upset.  Okay great what else.  I hope I have FS1 so I can watch baseball game today, but it would also be upsetting because I realize imagine how much stuff I could have been watching on FS1 this entire time.  I didn't even think to check if I could!  I've been missing out on classic FS1 content!  Hey that's life I guess.
One more paragraph for now!  The good news is I can easily write some dumb fluff.  On the other hand I can also potentially easily write some mediocre fluff!  (Positive mediocre).  Either way I'm gonna do what's easy, but maybe I'll get lucky and something good will show up anyway.  Yeah.  Frank Thomas's nick name was The Big Hurt.  I assume because He Hurts Baseballs.  He hits them with his baseball bat which has gotta smart.  Also presumably he hits them even harder than your average MLB player.  Such that he earned the nickname while everyone else hasn't.  Hmm.  Also maybe it's because He's Big.  The big may either be a noun or some sort of noun-adjective.  HUH.  That doesn't make sense.  I wish it did!  But it doesn't.  If there was such a thing as a noun-adjective we would have known about it by now.  Anyway time to cleanse myself.  Be back soon. 




If You Say So

    I CAN GET FS1 ON MY TV.  Oh Happy Day.  Anyway got some water going on.  It's ok!  Better than I expected definitely.  HEY Super Market seems to have 40 Calorie Fudge Pops which I can replace the 40 Calorie Fruit Flavor Pops with in my order!  Look would I LOVE to get both?  Yes.  Nothing would make me happier to set in motion during this 90 second time span.  But that would take up too much space in Freezer.  Not only too much space that it would upset my Dad-- literally possibly too much space that it actually can't be done!  Either way it's still a GOOD thing.  I'm GLAD this happened.  It just HURTS that I won't be able to get both.  That's part of life though.  The MAIN part.  HMM what if I alternate every 3 hours which is in freezer.  Put one in freezer for 3 hours, mix it up, then mix it up again every 3 hours.  That sounds PLAUSIBLE.  It could work.  I think it would work!  But only an insane person would actually do that.  No matter how clever it is and much it would probably work.  Ugh.
    Hey great what else is going on.  Got coffee going on.  That's going on.  Sure!  I like the daytime programming for sports channels.  Live Video Feed of radio shows!  Now that's entertainment!  What kind of people listen to radio.  Other than maybe in cars.  STRANGE people.  Not sure I even wanna know.  Better leave them to it and the less I'm involved the better!  Also in Today's Modern Cars gotta imagine they could and should put TV to the right of the wheel.  I'm sure we have the technology but for some reason this hasn't happened yet?  I don't get it!  Don't give me none of that safety concerns.  I've been driving cars and watching TV before you were even born!  No I haven't.  They don't have those cars, I just said that.  Also I never drove a car before OR EVEN AFTER your birth.  I do watch TV, though.  That part is true.  I watch a lot of television set!
     What else is going on.  Am I in the running for manager of The Mets?  Gotta imagine I'm somewhere near the bottom of their list of 300 million potential managers.  It's an honor just to be nominated!  Anyway I would take that job.  People would respect me!  Hey he's got a job well done.  That's what would make it all worth it.  What else is going on.  Maybe I can get a job as Live Video Feed monitor for Sports Radio Shows.  Just stare at the feed and make sure nothing bad happens.  What do I do if something bad happens.  Alert a superior!  Sounds about right.  Anyway two and a half more paragraphs to go until I get to stop for a while.  I like those odds!  I like lots of odds.  Except when the odds are against me.  Those odds are empirically bad for me I guess!  Wonderful!  I just looked up empirically and I have no idea whether it's right to use it there or not.  I can interpret the definition either way.  Because I'm dumb re: This Situation At Least.  Hey that's life.
     Penultimate paragraph!
  The generic for Synthroid?  What am I AN ANIMAL?  Maybe.  I guess!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta imagine I'll have more stuff to watch on The Television Set other than baseball games.  However baseball games will be making a strong showing in my recreational time today.  Two games!  Not at the same time!  WOW gotta imagine I'll watch ~1/5th of each game.  Which equates to ~1/5th of ALL games today.  Yep that math checks out good. Real Good!  No complaints with how that math checks out.  That's what this paragraph is about.  Hey did some easy math.  Math is right!  I like math.  Math is right when it's good and math is good when it's right.  I don't think that's controversial.  Are there a lot of anti-math people out there?  And when there's correct math it makes them angry?  I guess!  People get angry about lots of things!  Now that I think about it CERTAIN math might make me angry!  It makes some sense I guess!
     I don't know.  What else is going on.  I guess off the top of my head some of the worst math is when you're doing math and you get the wrong answer and then you find out the right answer.  What the hell?  THAT'S math?  That's not the answer I thought.  Where does math get off calling me stupid.  Dumb math.  You're the stupid one!  What else is going on that I can close up this entry with.  Gotta nice solid hour between entry and next walk.  I said that in italics because for some reason I was in italics when I started the sentence.  And rather than correct it I decided to just let the sentence flow out of me and qualify it afterwards with an explanation.  I feel I made the right decision!  On account of it taking up several sentences and getting me VERY close to being able to stop the entry now.  Hey great that's it!!  I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:39 P.M.




Wednesday, October 6, 2021

That's All Well And Good

    What's up!  My Mom is cleaning Coffee Machine or something like that.  So I can't make coffee right now!  She seemed to imply that it could be ready in half an hour or an hour.  That's still pretty upsetting to my day!  Could be worse though.  My day is Upset now.  APOLOGIZE to My Day.  Wait not you.  My Mom.  You've done nothing wrong!  YET.  Anyway the baseball game last night happened!  It was interesting because I was obviously rooting against the Yankees but then watching The Red Sox at home I realized ya know what I don't like the Red Sox Fans either.  These guys are jerks.  Being ROWDY?  Rooting for your team LOUDLY?  Thinking MY TEAM IS THE BEST ALL OTHER TEAMS SUCK when CLEARLY The Mets are the best?  Also there was one live shot after a Red Sox hit a home run and they showed people in the stands celebrating and then there was this college kid who was like ALRIGHT TIME TO CHUG TO MAKE THE MOST OF THIS MOMENT and he was chugging a beer like a jerk without realizing he was on camera.   The good news is My Mom just started coffee.  That was sooner than I anticipated!
    Look I understand people drinking beer.  I do it!  95% of the time it's not embarrassing.  But this was like a first time drinker look.  And everyone else is happy about the homerun.  And he's happy it gives him an excuse to Drink Beer Like A Real Man.  And we all saw it live on the television set!  Anyway yes this one shot made quite the impression on me.  NEGATIVE impression.  You don't wanna be making negative impressions on me!  I forget why.  Maybe because if it's a negative impression on me, that makes it likely it's making a negative impression on other people.  People whose impressions you don't wanna... be negative... negative impressions on them... they're getting similar impressions... hey what else is going on.  My Mom insisted in making coffee herself.  Not happy about that!  She doesn't have that magic touch like I do.  Then again if it makes her happy I'm all for it.  She's on her death bed as of last week so in her last remaining days if she wants to make coffee I'm okay with that.
     Yeah!  Mixed up direction of walks the last couple of days.  I set it up such that my walks in the park align with earlier times in the day more often than not!  Because it's getting to the point that the last 2 walks are after sundown completely.  Can't take walks in the park then!  Too hard to see!  SURE my eyes would adjust after 90 seconds well enough but it's not worth the effort!  No effort for me!  But effort for my eyes!  My eyes only have a finite amount of effort they can spend over the course of my life!  Don't wanna be wasting that effort every day on this dumb nonsense when I can maneuver around it!  Anyway.  I'm glad Yankee fans are unsatisfied with losing the wild card game as the ultimate result of their season but I'm also envious that they consider anything less than World Series Champion a disappointment.  HOW DARE THEY HAVE HIGH EXPECTATIONS THAT ARE RELATIVELY OFTEN FULFILLED.  They're TOO confident in their expectations and I'm worried that might make them overall happier people.  I want them to be UNHAPPY.  And the fans of my team to be happy.  ONLY ONE OF US CAN BE HAPPY and it might as well be me.
     I lost track of what that meant.  Oh well.  Possibly nothing!  Good thing I moved on then.  Fourth paragraph!  I'll have coffee after the fifth just like always.  Wonderful.  I PLEAD THE FIFTH.  Oh Yeah Well I Plead The Sixth Now Who Looks Like An Idiot.  Hmm.  Maybe I should have pled the fourth instead of the sixth.  Maybe the lower the positive integer the better!  We have no way of knowing.  Anyway.  Fourth Amendment is the one that says British Soldiers can't quarter themselves in your house.  That can't be it at all.  Well, I guess it could partly be it.  It could be American Soldiers can't quarter themselves in your house.  OBVIOUSLY British soldiers can't.  They come from another country!  Better LTURQ.  OH WAIT even before I look it up, I know.  FROGS.  Fourth Amendment is when frogs fall from the sky.  Okay I made that joke now better LTURQ what it really is.  Law against unreasonable search and seizures.  That's kind of what I said.  Only instead of British Soldiers it's American Search And Seizures.  So I was halfway there.
Yeah!  My Mom just gave me a comb.  She got it as a bonus for some sort of Hair Apparatus or Material she got in a delivery.  I don't have a comb until just now!  I dunno what combs are for, though.  You can run it through your hair but so what.  Hair doesn't change.  And if it does move positions a bit it's just gonna fall back to the way it was.  Also sure this must be inaccurate.  People use combs all the time.  And it can't be so huge a scam that everyone else also gets nothing out of it.  But I get nothing out of it and you can take that to the bank.   Deposit it!  Check in on it every year to make sure no one stole it!  Then pass that on to your children when you die.  Well, slightly after you die!  You can't pass it on WHEN you die, you're busy dying!  Anyway.  My Mom is doing a solid laundry of some of my laundry!  We're talking HALF A DOZEN shirts.  We're talking a pair or two of underwear.  We're talking SOCKS-- AN EVEN TWO OF 'EM!  HEY THIS IS GOOD STUFF.  LAUNDRY TALK.
Damnit!  Turns out my Mom didn't make coffee yet.  She gave me the impression she was!  On account of calling me and saying I'm making coffee.  Turns out it was all a scam.  Won't be started until 5 or 10 minutes from now!  That's USELESS to me Re: Act I!  Maybe I can have coffee with Act II AND Act III today.  Or just one cup of coffee instead of 2 which would be less calories.  OR I drink coffee with the last couple of paragraphs with Act I possibly.  Anyway you cut it though IT'S TERRIBLE.  Except for how all of those options aren't that bad.  If you don't consider it not being that bad, though, then it's TERRIBLE.  What else is going on.  And I made the temperature one degree cooler for her LIKE A CHUMP.  After saying she was making coffee she asked me to lower the temperature a degree?  I DID IT but she didn't live up to HER end up the bargain.  Whatta scam.  Life just be a never ending scam.  But I never thought I would get scammed by MY OWN MOTHER.  Maybe someone else's mother.  MAYBE.
    Huh.  What else is going on.  Also the comb!  That's a scam.  Two scams in one day from my Mother.  Can't blame my mother for Comb Scam.  She's an innocent victim of this scam, too.  Ugh!  What else.  National League Wildcard game tonight.  I KIND OF want to root for both teams.  Solid neutral impression of both Los Angeles Dodgeneers and St Louis Cardinalists.  This is a tough one!  Maybe see how the crowd for the home team is acting in the first inning.  It will rest on how much I like or dislike the fans I see.  Sounds fair.  What else sounds fair.  Maidens.  Maybe the maidens you know.  All the maidens I know are unfair!  Sure great.  I wondered yesterday if the special wall in Fenway Park would come into play yesterday in baseball game.  IT DID!  At first I was like WOW I CALLED IT.  Then I realized well it probably comes into play this much every game.  Not so big a prediction to be confirmed.  So I got that going against me.
    Sure!  Eighth paragraph.  At this point I'm not gonna have coffee with Act I.  Probably with Act II!  Possibly 2nd cup with Act III or no 2nd cup at all.  OR 2nd Cup LATER IN THE DAY???  Wow that would be a very interesting mix-em-up!  Amazing.  AMAZING stuff.  I can't get over the Amazingness.  What else is going on.  I guess in the 1700's there was a lot of soldiers making themselves at home in your home.  Don't they belong in the barracks?  Why is there no other place for them to live that they just have to pick a home and be like ALRIGHT NOW I'M IN CHARGE HERE.  Maybe I don't understand this hot-button issue completely.  I could be misinterpreting what it is!  All I know is the word quarters comes into play and I'm a fan of that word in this context!  I feel like quarters is a drinking game.  Probably involving quarters.  Possibly flipping quarters into cups.  Cups with beer in them.  And I'd guess you'd have to drink the beer and/or your opponent will have to drink the beer.  My guess is that's 20% accurate.  Lemme LTURQ.  YEP that's it.  Pretty much 100%!  Sounds like a crappy game.
Most games are crappy!  There's maybe a couple of dozen good games and then there's tens of thousands of reject games out there.  The point is it's the ninth paragraph.  Maybe the origin of Quarters the Drinking Game was You Have To Let British Soldiers Live In Your House And Then They Drink All Your Beer.  Wow talk about adding insult to injury.  What else is going on.  Maybe the British Soldiers will share your beer with you.  Then at least you're having some fun.  HMM the starting pitcher for Dodgers tonight is the best player on my Fantasy Baseball team from this year.  I've been rooting for him all year!  Then again maybe I'm THROUGH with rooting for him.  I've had my fill!  Now it's time to root for someone else!  I've given myself a lot to think about or something.  Three days into doing push ups and sit ups!  So far so good.  I'm totally able to do as many as I want!  Taking into account I only want to do a reasonable amount.  Still though!  Good stuff.
     Last paragraph of the act.  I don't believe it!  I feel like I'm missing the coffee now.  Not just tastewise and funactivitywise but also energywise.  Oh well that'll all be rectified soon when I have coffee after getting back from walk.  Rectified REAL good.  My mom just called up to me that the coffee is ready.  GREAT.  WAY TO GO.  Better late than never.  Sometimes.  Gotta imagine in lots of scenarios Better Never Than Late.  I can't think of any off the top of my head because I don't feel like it.  But you get the point.  Possibly.  There probably is a point I was trying to make.  So there IS a point to get.  You probably don't get it though.  I barely get it!  Ugh.  What else is going on to close up with.  Might not have quite as much soda as I want this week.  I TRIED.  I tried to get slightly more to last me.  Still not quite enough.  GREAT Now we're ending things on a sad note.  That's too bad.  I'll be back soon.




I Wouldn't Put It Past Me

    Hello friends.  Time to write five more paragraphs.  I got coffee going for me.  Wonderful.  Tastes the same as when I make it!  Even though one would guess it had a Slightly Different Water to Coffee Grounds proportion.  Hmm maybe slight differences don't matter as much as I thought they did.  Maybe maybe not.  We're not gonna settle this today!  Let's all go home and rest.  Do some further research.  Come back tomorrow with a fresh take!  Hmm.  Probably gonna have coffee with Act III.  I don't WANT TO.  I feel like I MUST.  But if I don't really need it why bother.  Damnit this is a real Schindler's Choice.  I feel like 99% of the people who died in the holocaust would be dead by now anyway.  So REALLY what's the difference.  SORRY.  Nope.  NOPE!  SORRY.  No good.  Oh well.
    I can say that because I died in the holocaust.  Possibly.  What else is going on.  I think the blanket conclusion lesson of the Holocaust Never Forget was A LITTLE too vague.  They should have also specified Also Don't Remember It AND LIKE IT.  That little loophole has been causing all sorts of ruckus!  What else is going on.  Looking forward to a nice bath soon.  A WATER bath.  Not a GAS BATH.  Gotta imagine no one had the luxury of Gas Baths in the holocaust.  What else is going on.  Not sure gas chambers doubled as showers.  Maybe they told them hey here comes a shower get undressed.  But I don't see why they'd actually set up a shower.  Unless the gas is in liquid form.  Which it isn't!  It's in gaseous form!  That's what the word gas seems to imply to me.  Then again maybe they were showering too what do I know.  Kill two birds with one stone.  Kill em and clean em!  Ugh.  No.  NO!  NO GOOD.  Oh well.
     Here's a new paragraph.  I haven't made any holocaust jokes yet this paragraph!  Let's see if I can keep that streak going and if so for how long.  I'm enjoying coffee right now.  To enough of an extent that it's making it more likely I re-up with coffee for act III!  Hey this is great let's keep it going is how I feel.  Both re: Drinking Coffee and re: No More Holocaust Talk.  So I got that going for me.  If I was a critic in 1998 I'd be like HEY Roberto Beinigni, "LIFE IS BEAUTIFUL?"  THIS IS ABOUT THE HOLOCAUST IT'S A TERRIBLE THING THAT HAPPENED.  ZERO STARS.  Now all we have to do is double check that it's from 1998... and...  GOD DAMNIT 1997.  I Was THINKING I should change it to 1997.  If I had gone and made a back up guess it would have been 1997.  But I didn't!  This is the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone ever. 
     Great.  Hmm.  Maybe if I WAS a critic in 1998 I could have said that.  10% chance it wasn't released in America, Where Critics Live, until 1998!  Let's go to the video tape.  In the US it was released 23 October 1998.  YEAH.  PARTIAL CREDIT.  I don't get 100% but I get a solid amount of partial credit!  Also is it possible I can move on from this topic because I have nothing else to say about anything relating to this.  Makes sense.  Anyway.  Going to the gas chamber and a Nazi Guard asks you for your watch.  You gotta be like well I'm dying why not this'll be my good deed for the day.  That sort of thing.  Anyway the time that this act is completely over is really creeping up on us!  I look forward to that immensely.  Anyway.  Only thing I learned from baseball game last night is that I'm not rooting for the Red Sox going forward in the playoffs.  Jerks!  Fans are jerks at least!  And they, the baseball players, are jerks for trying to appease their fans insatiable appetitive for being successful jerks!  Huh.
Last paragraph of the act.  What kind of TV do I have in store for today.  Maybe some fillums.  Maybe some other stuff.  I don't have all the details in front of me!  Well I have the details in front of me in terms of the dimension of TIME.  As time passes throughout the day I will accumulate the details of what stuff I might have in store on TV.  On a As Time Goes On by As Time Goes On basis.  So I got that going for me is the point.  Gotta clean up my bathroom soon.  It's been three months and lots of crap is accumulating!  Mainly hair.  Hair accumulating in the corners of the room.  Dunno whose hair.  Presumably mine!  Not sure where it 's coming from.  And why it's bunching up.  But I guess some things we'll never know for sure why they happen.  Anyway I'm gonna bathe now!  Be back soon.




Congratulations On Making It This Far

    Hey!  I am gonna drink another cup of coffee!  After this paragraph.  I'll get right on it!  Also we'll all get WRITE ON IT.  I'll be writing-- while, "On," It!  When you're, "On," something that means you're consuming it and presumably it has some mental or behavioral immediate effects.  That's part of it!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna have a pretty decent sized break between Entry and Next Walk.  This always happens now!  On account of always getting up earlier than I used to.  Also the more this schedule becomes The Standard, the less extreme this break seems!  At first any break was notable!  Now that I'm used to it it seems like not such a big break at all!  So basically This CAN'T Be My Big Break.  The space between entry and walking.  That Thing.  Oh hey here comes coffee.
     Wonderful.  What else is going on.  What's the tagline for Poltergeist III.  I was talking about it with my Dad.  We all know for the first one it's Carol Anne saying They're Here!  And I All Know the sequel is They're Back!  I know there's a third one but I forget it.  But now that I remember to check I'm gonna LTURQ.  WELL THIS IS A BIT OF A LET DOWN.  It's, "They're Back... Again."  For some reason I gave the franchise too much credit that they'd have an equally pithy Tagline for the third installment.  I was wrong!  Now I feel cheated.  I've been watching these movies under false pretenses!  But it's my own fault I suppose.  I was wrong!  I'm man enough to admit it.  Probably.  What else is going on.  Got some nice meals in store for today.  Don't worry about me!  Worry about yourself!  Or don't, I'm not the boss of you.  Also, even if I was the boss of you, I'd say make your own decision on this.  I'm not invested either way!
     What else is going on.  If Coffee with Fat Free Cream was zero calories, how many coffees will I drink a day.  Right now I drink 2 separate cups, each of which is about 2 Of Your Standard Measurement-wise Cups.  If there were no calories, gotta imagine I'd be drinking 4, right?  Probably not more than 4.  Possibly as few as 3!  But MORE THAN 2 I think we can safely say that.  Good paragraph.  This is what people wanna hear about.  How much coffee I would drink under different circumstances.  It's relatable too because other people drink beverages all the time too.  What else is going on.  Also in this Thought Exercise coffee has exact same effects physiologically EXCEPT for calories.  You still wouldn't wanna drink 10 and be all jumpy.  Probably!  Most people wouldn't want to at least.  Again, you can want to drink how many coffees you want.  I may or may not be the boss of you, but, just in case I am, I encourage you to make this determination for yourself!
     Penultimate paragraph.  Maybe I should give you some guidance on whether to drink 10 cups of coffee or not.  You need an authority figure to direct you.  Hmm.  Hmm.  Don't do it.  I put careful thought into it and that's my decision!  Ship up or shape out!  What else is going on.  Have we all forgot about me making fun with the holocaust.  I think so.  It's a distant memory at this point.  Whew.  The point is we still have to write another paragraph and a half.  Then I take What Will Be A Decent Sized Break.  Possibly AN HOUR.  Wow that's TWO COMPLETE HALF HOURS.  You heard it here first!  HMM That happens in About A Boy.  Hugh Grant divides his life into half hours.  FRIVOLOUSLY.  All his activities are A SYNONYM OF FRIVOLOUS.  At that point in the movie at least!  Good movie.  Good soundtrack!  All that stuff.
     Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  Today is Wednesday huh.  I believe my next chore will be Accepting Super Market Delivery Friday Morning.  Well not really.  I have to spend time ANTICIPATING that for the next 48 hours too!  That's even bigger a chore.  The thing itself goes by quickly.  Anyway what else is going on and crap.  The next 48 hours?  That's The Next NINETY SIX Half Hours.  Do the math yourself!  I think you'll find it checks out nicely.  Also what else is going on.  I dunno if I'm anticipating enjoying this entry being over now.  I was looking forward to it all entry.  But now I realize hmm don't have a good thing lined up for right after.  THEN AGAIN something can occur to me any moment.  Maybe NOW!  Maybe... NOW.  Probably in 90 seconds or so maybe I Don't Know What Do I Know.  Whatever.  The point is I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:46 P.M.





Tuesday, October 5, 2021

Today Has A Lot Going For It

    Sure.  Time to write some paragraphs!  I am Home Alone right now.  Dad and Mom are away!  FINALLY I can leave my bedroom door open and not have to worry about Hearing The TV From Downstairs.  This is going great!  Nice cool pleasant breeze from the hallway.  Letting the air circulate a bit.  It's all good news.  Anyway today is a special day because you and I are together again.  That sounds like Mr. Rodgers.  Mr. Rodgers is a creep.  He's a stranger in our home and he's coming on to our children!  That's unacceptable!  If anyone is gonna come to our home and come on to our children HE BETTER BE SOMEONE WE KNOW.  We know Mr. Rodgers.  From yesterday.  And the day before.  Sure it's probably Mr. Rogers and not Mr. Rodgers who cares get off my back about it.  Anyway I never saw Mr. Rodgers myself.  Off TV by the mid 90's!  It's about time.
Yeah!  Won't you be my neighbor.  Look, either we're neighbors or we're not.  Maybe we drew the luck of having you as a neighbor, maybe we didn't! Either way I'm not gonna go ahead and move somewhere just to be your neighbor.  Maybe I will move somewhere just to NOT be your neighbor, how do you like that?  Why does this guy want neighbors so much anyway.  I have no relationship with my neighbor.  I stay out of their business and they pretend to stay out of mine.  We all know secretly they spend every waking hour with their head to the adjoining wall to see what kind of sounds they can pick up.  But I KNOW THIS and can easily deceive them.  Give 'em false sounds to throw them off my scent!  And the REAL sounds I make real quiet-like so they can't even hear!
     Anyway.  Hmm.  Do most private houses Not Share Walls with neighbors?  Probably!  We do though.  Get off my back about it.  The setup is kind of like it's one huge house and then there's two sides which are mirror images of each other.  And we live in the RIGHT side.  Solidly the size of a private house and we don't share anything other than Wall.  And it's not divided by HORIZONTAL FLOORS but by VERTICAL WALLS.  So it's a house okay don't get the wrong idea it's definitely a house!  PLEASE BELIEVE ME.  What else is going on.  Apparently Facebook was down yesterday!  Oh No!  Whatever will we do!  We can't... uh... look at photos?  I forget what's appealing about Facebook.  I've been de-activated for roughly 3 or 4 years and I've never been healthier!  Maybe when I was a child.  I was probably healthier when I was 8 years old!  If you don't count all the nose bleeds.  DON'T BLAME ME PICKING MY NOSE.  It often happened INDEPENDENT of me picking my nose.  Maybe picking my nose set the blood into motion.  It didn't start flowing until an hour later.  But we can't say for sure!
     Kids pick noses!  Nothing to be ashamed of.  I feel like I probably don't pick my nose anymore.  Maybe I do and just don't think about it!  Haven't had a nosebleed in over 20 years, though.  That's a good sign I'm not picking my nose.  And if I am it's only a responsible amount!  What else is going on.  I think we should have more ear wax.  Picking ears could be fun.  Hmm.  Maybe it's just me that has very little earwax.  Because that is the case for me.  Maybe you got tons of earwax.  In which case I envy you.  What else is going on.  Not 100% why this is relevant but I just remembered how when we went out to eat as a family as a kid, the most exciting thing would be if when leaving the restaurant they had a bowl of toothpicks you could take.  I LOVED taking a toothpick and putting it in my mouth.  Both for using it practically and/or just putting it there hanging out of my mouth for style.  Hmm.  Go figure.
Sure.  The Mets fired their manager!  Or didn't renew his contract.  Either way he's not coming back as manager!  I'm okay with this.  Honestly I was never 100% happy with how he was both young and not a major league career.  I dunno why those two things combined for me into a negative impression, they just did.  I thought well if he's young he probably should have been a recent major league player.  And/or if he wasn't a major league player he should at least be old.  You can't argue with an impression!  Especially a dumb impression!  We all know it's dumb and arguing with it would be pointless!  WAIT A SECOND his father is Felipe Alou.  I've HEARD Of that guy.  Now I don't know what to think!  Same stuff as before probably.  That sounds the easiest thing to think.  Already used to it.  So I got that going for me!
     Hey coffee time!  Also his brother is Mousies Alou.  I remember him from video games!  BASEBALL video games.  Felipe Alou had 10 children.  Wow he must have had sex ALL THE TIME.  We're talking at least TEN TIMES over the course of his post pubescent life.  Wow he must be living the dream.  Also let's be honest he must be running a very high success rate if every sex led to a child.  We're talking he probably must have had sex TWELVE OR THIRTEEN TIMES.  That's probably once every two years for 20-30 years!  WOW twice in one year?!?!  EVERY YEAR?!?!  Moving on.  It's time to move on!  The criticism of Luis Rojas was that he was too much a Player's Manager.  Something about how oh he was too close to he players.  He should be antagonizing them more.  Wonderful.  That's what you think bosses should do.  Don't relate to your subordinates as equals you must be JERKS to them and not care about them.  What's the deal with things!
     Then again I've never had a job so maybe bosses antagonizing workers increases productivity!  In which case well if it increases productivity I'M SOLD that's good for the workers definitely!  Sure great what else.  Enjoying coffee right now.  Appropriate amount of Fat Free Cream as well as Artificial Sweetener!  Totally tastes like the coffee I'm used to day in day out.  What does day out mean.  I get Days being IN.  Wait a second no I don't.  What else is going on.  Gonna have to trick My Mom into doing laundry some time over the next week.  Maybe use reverse psychology.  Don't even bring it up so she doesn't think I'm desperate.  Eventually it will occur to her hey nobody asked me to do their laundry I BETTER DO IT.  Either that or it won't occur to her because if I'm not asking for it I probably don't want it.  Hmm.  Really makes ya think.
Eighth paragraph already!  What a world, what a world.  Nice MLB playoff wildcard game tonight.  Solid rivalry between the teams!  Should be fun to watch.  Assuming I watch it.  It might be even more fun to not watch!  In which case I Gotta Go WIth Whatever Is Most Fun.  Hmm.  Can't remember the last time I had fun.  I have pleasurable experiences all the time.  Positive entertainment and whatnot mostly.  But a complete and undeniable FUN?  Been a while!  Presumably since drinking alcohol.  That was fun!  It's fun to either do drugs and/or be around people.  Ideally both.  But possibly just do drugs.  And Drugs are including alcohol.  You wanna have fun you need SOME sort of social stimulation.  Watching TV just isn't enough!  Then again what else is going on.  The Red Sox have home field advantage over the Yankees for the one-off wild card game?!?!  They have an INTERESTING wall in left field.  I can't wait to see if that comes into play!
     Ugh.  Anyway!  Pretty nicely on schedule today.  Solidly ahead of what schedule used to be standardly!  But lately I've been ahead of schedule every day.  So at some point being ahead of schedule becomes being on schedule.  One would imagine.  I may have made this point before, but is it possible the kid from Little Big League is available to manage the Mets.  Not only was he a good manager then, but now he's solidly a grown adult man and would presumably be an even BETTER manager now.  Hmm.  If he was roughly 12 in 1994 he must be roughly 40 now.  Also was Little Big League from 1994?  Let's GO TO THE INTERNET.  YEP 1994.  ALRIGHT now we're talking!  Also get this on Wikipedia it says the character was 12 years old!  Now we're talking Even More!  I can't say how old the actor was because he has no wikipedia page.  Unless something is on wikipedia there's no way of knowing it!  Sounds like a fair conclusion.
Last paragraph of the Act!  I don't like how in a few weeks or so I'm gonna have to start wearing Heavier Jacket.  I have no in-between jacket from Heavier Sweatshirt Jacket and Winter Jacket.  WAIT YES I DO.  I got a leather jacket.  Oh okay now we're talking.  Not only is there an in-between jacket but it's LEATHER which is stylish.  People will want to have sex with me twice a year if I'm wearing a stylish jacket!  Probably!  Anyway what else is going on.  I wonder if the zipper works on leather jacket.  I wonder if there even is a zipper.  If I remember correctly there both is a zipper and it works.  Hmm this is good stuff.  Zippers are fun get off my back about it.  Anyway.  I dunno.  I could always wear three shirts and two sweatshirt jackets.  Get creative with layering if I wanna figure out exact ways to simulate warmth and coolth.  That's not simulation that's ACTUAL.  Anyway I'll be back soon.




Is This Still Going On

    Hey wait a second.  If you have sex 10-12 times, that's not twice a year for 20-30 years!  That's Every Other Year.  Either way still pretty good.  Hey wait a second.  I've talked about Mr. Rodgers 10-12 times before and ya gotta imagine I made every possible obvious just at least 4 times.  Which would include today's obvious jokes!  Either way still pretty good.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta nice upcoming schedule.  ACT.  Bath.  ACT.  Short-mid-length break.  WALK.  Take a walk that's what I always say.  Huh.  My parents are back!  Mom's eyesight is good.  She's doin better than me now!  She needs no glasses for watching TV.  While I DO.  Well if I wanna read the closed captioning I do!  I can successfully stare at the TV without wearing glasses and somewhat make out the blobs as people.  But if I wanna read what's going on I need glasses.  Can't I just hear people speaking.  Yeah but whose got the time!
     Wonderful.  Today is October 5.  FINALLY we're just about almost 1/6th into October.  It's about time!  Well it's 4.5 days overall technically.  That's more like 1/7th into October.  DON'T RUIN MY GOOD TIME YOU ASSHOLE.  What else is going on.  So far I have a solid streak of 2 days of doing push ups and pull ups.  Wait a second no pull ups.  Push ups and situps.  Pull ups are where there's a horizontal bar somehow and you gotta pull yourself up.  What the hell is holding up this horizontal bar though.  That's what I'm wondering!  Either way that sounds difficult.  I don't like the idea of having to do something difficult!  However the idea of having a horizontal bar somewhere in my room sounds like fun.  Even if it is just floating in space somehow and nothing is holding it up.  Maybe I'M holding it up while doing the push ups.  No I don't think that makes sense physically. OR SPIRITUALLY.
Huh.  Feel like this is the first time I've insisted on calling Mr. Rogers Mr. Rodgers.  That's just the kind of thing you'd remember!  Solid 60% chance I've insisted on calling him Mr. Rodgers before.  Ya know what?  HIGHER THAN 60%!  That's the kind of risks you take when writing this website.  Repeating the same thing for the ninth time over and over.  Hmm seems like if you're repeating something for the ninth time over and over it would increase to the tenth and then the eleventh time, etc each time.  You'd think so wouldn't you.  You'd be wrong!  Stuck at the ninth time!  Hmm.  I just saw George Harrison trending on Twitter and was like OH NO DID GEORGE HARRISON DIE and then ten seconds later I was like Wait a second George Harrison died 20 years ago.  So we got that going for us.  Also guess what year George Harrison died.  Why It Was Only 2001.  NAILED IT.  FINALLY some good is coming out of this tragic loss.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  Wonderful.  I had to DO SOMETHING yesterday.  We got someone's mail yesterday and it seemed like important confidential Bank Stuff and I had to walk that sucker over to the right address A SOLID FIVE HOUSES AWAY to give to them.  They didn't answer!  Left it outside!  I did all I could and now it's in God's Hands.  Presumably God has hands.  Maybe even more than two of them!  My guess is that God is exactly like GORO from Mortal Kombat.  Both physically and in spirit.  What else is going on.  I tried watching Street Fighter yesterday but the Xbox just wouldn't recognize the disc.  I tried opening and closing it 35 times and it never worked!  Either way Yes I Have 200 Films On DVD and the only one worth watching as of yesterday is Street Fighter.  But that's not in the cards apparently.  DAMNIT ALL TO HELL.
Wonderful.  I haven't seen it in a while!  I want to see what it's all about now that I'm several years older and more mature.  I can get MORE out of it than The Past Times.  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine there's several sentences worth of things also going on that I can wrap up this act with.  Uh oh then there's 5 more paragraphs presumably without those several sentences worth of things.  We'll cross that bridge when we get there!  Unless if we wanna stay on our side of the bridge!  I'm not 100% convinced that crossing this bridge will get us anywhere better than where we already are!  Also Risky!  Sure bridge probably won't collapse but all things being equal why even bother taking the risk!  I wish I lived on a bridge.  Huh.  You mean like a troll?  Trolls live under bridges.  Yeah I wanna live ON TOP of the bridge.  Hmm.  I'll be back in a little bit.




Let's Read Up To The End

    How can trolls live underneath bridges.  If there's a place underneath the bridge for the troll to live, why is the bridge there in the first place?  Hmm.  Anyway got some snapple going on right now.  Delicious!  It's ICED TEA I believe.  Or maybe just Lemon Flavor Water.  Or both!  Either way Delicious.  I wonder why Street Fighter doesn't work.  I don't think I watched it so many times.  I don't think I left it out of case so often.  I guess Xbox just isn't a fan of Street Fighter!  Pretty dumb of Xbox but then again Xbox is the dumbest thing possible A MACHINE.  You heard me Machines!  I'm calling you out!  For being dumb!  If you're so smart just play the Digital Video Disc what the Hell is your problem.  Maybe I should track down the VHS I have of Street Fighter and jam that into the Xbox.  I dunno if I still have my non-home-movie old VHSes.  Well that solves that problem.  By not solving the problem.  But it solves the problem of potentially having to solve the problem.  We now know there is possibly no solution!
     Yeah!  Wonderful.  Anyway gotta write four more paragraphs.  I wonder what I will say in them.  I already erroneously called DVDs Digital Video Discs when we all know DVD really means... lemme LTURQ...  Digital Video Disc.  Hmm.  Nailed! It!  For some reason I thought the V would be different.  Was confident in the Digital Discs but the Video I had a gut feeling was some other sort of V.  I WAS WRONG BY BEING RIGHT and I apologize.  I talked to my brother yesterday to wish him a happy birthday and it turns out he's been watching The Sampsons too!  We're on different seasons but its nice to know I have a friend whose also taking a Sampsons Journey these days.  He's on season 24?!?!  I'm only on season 16?!?  This hardly seems fair.  Also it's REALLY not fair because he didn't put in the work to get to season 24! He just picked it by random!  Look if you're watching The Simpsons PUT IN THE WORK.  Start from the beginning.  You IDIOT.
     Anyway.  Kind of upset I don't appear in the Pandora Papers.  I mean it's good that I'm not getting in trouble for anything.  And it's ACCURATE that I haven't participated in any of these activities.  However all in all I feel my life would be better if I was hiding ill gotten millions of dollars places.  And probably Still Won't Face Any Consequences.  I like what that fact would imply about the rest of my life!  Oh well can't hurt to dream.  Also only the best of the best are in the pandora papers!  It's a real WHOSE WHO of the best people around.  It'd be a PRIVILEGE and an HONOR to be among that class of people.  Oh well can't hurt to dream.  TONY BLAIR?  DOESN'T GET ANY CLASSIER THAN THAT.  I assume Tony Blair is a combination of Tony Soprano and Linda Blair.  That's why I think he's the classiest!  Huh.
Penultimate paragraph.  What else is going on.  WHOSE WHO?  One can only imagine I made that erroneous spelling of Who's ON PURPOSE and For A Joke and IT IS FUNNY SOMEHOW.  We're making a lot of assumptions with that there.  A LOT of assumptions.  Also sure I like the word erroneous. I think we should all be saying it more often.  It's fun!  Anyway that's a good idea for next The Who album.  Either one! Who's Who OR Whose Who.  Now the ball is in their court.  Also I've probably made that Album Name Suggestion twice in the past.  Oh well.  Also I could have joked about making it in the past by saying I made it nine times in the past.  Instead O said two.  You know why?  Because it's most likely I've said it two times in the past!  Just Now being the third time!  I don't make Jokes I make Accuracies.  Get off my back about it!
   Also I often don't make Accuracies.  I don't make Jokes I don't make Accuracies I just make... uhh... what's the third kind of thing you can say?  Whatever it is That's What This Is.  Wonderful.  Gotta nice 30-40 minute break it's looking like after this act before next walk.  I can watch Plenty Of Stuff in that time.  Maybe a Tales From That Crypt for some reason.  It just occurred to me and I do things that occur to me!  If I didn't wanna do them why should I bother having them occur to me?  Occur to me ERRONEOUSLY.  Nope.  God Being Goro is borderline amusing if you know who Goro is!  Gotta imagine some people are familiar with Goro and some people aren't.  That's life!  Gotta imagine if you understand references you are inherently amused by them.  HEY I KNOW THAT THING.  How Amusing.  Great.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:48 P.M.




Monday, October 4, 2021

First Things First

    Hey dummies.  It's gonna be 20 paragraphs we get to write and/or read coming up!  PERSONALLY I will be 70% writing it out of 100% and 20% reading it out of 100%.  My guess is you will HMM HOW MUCH WILL YOU BE WRITING IT.  I was gonna say Zero but maybe when you read this you feel like you're writing it, too!  Anyway you're also 20% reading it and maybe you're partially writing it too!  That makes sense.  TOO MUCH SENSE.  Wait not too much sense.  An appropriate amount of sense!  Things can't make too much sense.  If it makes sense it's a good thing!  Otherwise the universe wouldn't allow it.  So if it makes A Lot Of Sense how could that be too much?  The More Sense The Better, that's what I've always said.  Never said it before.  This might be the start of a tradition, though!  Gotta start somewhere.  MONDAY TODAY HUH?  IF YOU SAY SO.
Hey wonderful just wonderful.  Nice day I got in store for me.  Dunno what I'm gonna do but presumably when I recalibrate in a few hours I'll work the kinks out.  The Rest Of The Day Kinks.  GOOD Kinks.  I think if you don't specify it might be implied your standard kinks are bad.  Hey NORMAL IS GOOD now there's KINKS?!!  That's a detriment to Normal and thus Good.  But sometimes kinks make things better.  THIS GUY knows what I'm talking about!  What guy.  Some guy that's neither you nor me.  Oh I see that narrows it down.  Anyway what else is going on.  I was looking at KFC Menu for some reason and I was like hey if I really wanted to eat a 4000 calorie meal I could do a lot worse than KFC.  A LOT worse.  When I first started high school I think I thought I would be getting KFC every day.  It was in Penn Station on way to and from high school.  And it was a novelty at the time that I only got rarely before then.  I got it once or twice and it was gross.  Both because of the location and also because it turns out KFC is gross!  Now we know.
  Does KFC still come in buckets.  I feel like that was the novelty of KFC either when I was very young or even before I was born.  Buy some fried chicken and you get a nice bucket with it.  I'm guessing they discontinued that practice by now.  Well you lost MY VOTE.  What vote.  IF YOU HAVE TO ASK YOU CLEARLY DON'T KNOW.  Anyway what else is going on.  Been a while since I had ANY sort of bucket.  Seems like kind of an oversight.  Buckets are bad for the environment.  I'm not 100% sure why but I feel like that's a safe assumption to make.  EVERYTHING is bad for the environment.  That's almost true.  I feel like 90% of things are bad for the environment.  Oh well that's life.  Is there anything actively GOOD for the environment.  I know there's terrible things for the environment, bad things for the environment, more or less generally bad things for the environment, and neutral things for the environment.  Anything GOOD we can do?  I don't think so that doesn't make much sense.  Human and Environment are Mortal Enemies.
Fourth paragraph!  Amazing.  HMM Fourth Paragraph and FINAL paragraph start with the same letter and/or phonetic sound.  Does that mean this is the last paragraph?  No. Of course not.  That's nonsense.  STILL it couldn't hurt to dream.  Unless you're driving a car.  Then you can easily get into an accident.  Even if you're driving some other sort of vehicle!  Anyway.  Was taking my walks and there were 2 or 3 Go Kart Lawn Mowers driving around on the sidewalk/lawns.  Not sure if you need a license for these go kart lawnmowers.  They're definitely vehicles that could run you over.  And they're on the sidewalk half the time-- exactly where people are walking!  The point is I wonder if they need a license AND how much a go kart costs AND if it's legal to drive go kart lawnmowers down the streets OR sidewalks.  Clearly they're driving around on the sidewalk now.  There's probably some law that goes if you're traveling over let's say half a mile Now It's Illegal.  Gotta keep it in a CONFINED space.  You must be using it FOR LAWN MOWING GOOD not for Travel.
That's a strangely phrased Law.  Seems kind of too colloquial.  HEY how about this for fall weather-- I'm wearing my sweatshirt jacket-- INSIDE.  Not just for style but for Heat Temperature Comfort.  Was getting too cold without it!  Then again it's also for style.  It's a nice GREY sweatshirt jacket.  JEALOUS MUCH?  Why are they called sweatshirts lets talk about it.  Presumably if you were sweating you wouldn't be wearing the shirt.  That's all we had to talk about it with.  Nothin' else there.  Amazing.  Coffee after this paragraph!  Hey that's Amazing too.  Two amazing things in a row!  Coffee coming soon and the dumb thing I said before then.  Something about how if sweat shirts made you sweat you wouldn't wear them.  Yeah that sounds vaguely familiar.  Anyway.  Oh hey this paragraph is over.  And here I was sitting here for 400 minutes trying to think of something to say.  When I could have just hit Enter and then Indent!  FALSE.  Indent doesn't work.  It changes the format of the website page or something.  Gotta just hit Space Bar several times to MIMIC an Indentation.  YEAH. 
     I've talked about that before.
  Probably roughly 20 times.  CAN'T INDENT GOTTA MIMIC IT.  Ya know what 20 times isn't that much considering I have to do it 20 times A DAY.  So get off my back about it, etc.  MLB Playoff Starting Positions are in!  I'm rooting for hmm I can pick some teams to root for slightly more than the other teams they're facing.  But then again I forget why I'm supposed to care.  Baseball is FUN to watch.  You got the 9 innings.  You got home and away.  Strategy comes into play.  You put all that together and you got a BLAST AND A HALF of a Three Hour and 10 Minute period.  Three hours and 10 minutes?  WHY DON'T THEY JUST SAY 190 MINUTES TO SAVE TIME.  They need to save all the time they can!  These games are taking forever!  Hmm.  Why is Them Saying It being added on to the time of the game.  THEY TAKE A BREAK IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FOURTH INNING TO SAY IT.  Oh okay now I see.
     Seventh paragraph.  My Mom is watching SNL and before seeing him she thought Owen Wilson was James Bond.  And I was like man what an idiot.  Then I realized well what do we really know about The Real James Bond.  We know he has it in him to go deep undercover.  Maybe it is Owen Wilson!  We don't know for sure.  The Real James Bond isn't a person it's a book.  Books are people.  Huh.  OWEN WILSON?  YOU KNOW WHAT I SAY?  DENNIS THE MENACE IS OWIN' WILSON AN APOLOGY.  Nailed it.  Well that's it for tonight!!!  Huh?  I have to write more?  That hardly sounds fair.  Anyway what else is going on.  KFC is great for 4000 calorie meals because I feel like you could eat the 4000 calories and not feel full.  Some other place, 4000 calories would become a hassle 2/3rds through and you'd feel sick.  KFC?  I feel like you could just eat that indefinitely without feeling satisfied.  YEAH.
Eighth paragraph.  Not sure what I'm basing that on.  It sounds like something that might be an insight-em-up but it also sounds like something well I don't get it Why Is That The Case.  Then again I'll Take My Word For It.  That's life I guess.  YOU KNOW WHAT I SAY?  TOM HANKS IS OWIN' WILSON AN APOLOGY.  No I don't say that.  Let's stick with the first one.  I mean I guess Volley Ball Wilson is KIND OF owed an apology.  I feel like he's lost at sea ultimately, right?  Due to Tom Hanks.  What a shitty thing to do to a friend.  Lose Them At Sea.  Oh well what can ya do.  Tom Hanks' name can be abbreviated T. Hanks.  THANKS.  This is the kind of high quality content you've grown accustomed to getting from this website.  Also am I sure it's Tom Hanks and not Tom Hank.  And the reason I'm thinking of Tom Hanks is because I always think of him in the possessive and/or I always think of Multiple Tom Hank's?  Now I don't know what to think.  Maybe it is Tom Hank.  Gonna have to LTURQ later once I have the time.
     Penultimate paragraph of the act!  How much did the volleyball who played Wilson in Castaway make.  He's one of the main supporting characters!  Gotta imagine he made a solid mid-to-high six figure sum for that role.  What's a ball gonna do with money.  Well maybe the owner gets the money.  Oh okay I see.   What else is going on.  Solid 2/3rds chance Wilson is lost at sea and 1/3rd chance he has some other ultimate fate.  I can't REMEMBER.  Get off my back about it.  What's Tom Hank's name in the movie.  Something Castaway.  Maybe Bill.  Bill Castaway.  Better LTURQ just to make sure.  Oh Chuck Noland.  I was halfway there.  More or less got it right.  While reading the cast list on Wikipedia to find out the name of the character I honestly was half prepared to see someone listed as Wilson.  We're beyond joking right now.  For a half second I was like hmm wonder who played Wilson.
Last paragraph of the act!  I wasn't so much wondering who played Wilson as I was PREPARED to find out who played him.  I didn't really care because I knew it would be no one I ever heard of but I sort of expected o see it in my peripheral vision while seeing Tom Hank's characters' name.  Great just great.  What is the main thing Dennis The Menace does to Wilson that's so bad.  Runs around on his lawn.  Off the top of my head that's about as high the stakes get.  Maybe Dennis has a go kart lawnmower and is always chasing Mr. Wilson down when he laves the house.  LEAVES the house?  More like Dennis the menace is STOMPING AROUND on the leaves on Mr. Wilson's yard!  Those leaves don't belong to you Dennis!  Stay away from Mr. Wilson's Leaves!  Huh.  I lost track of what I was talking about.  Oh hey the paragraph is over.  I'll be back soon.



Now It's Time For The Middle

    Hello friends!  Nice long break between Walk II and future Walk III.  I have both Acts and Cleansing Activity to cover some of the time in-between but I also am gonna have some FREE time.  Wow TIME?  TO DO STUFF?  NOW YOU'RE TALKING MY LANGUAGE.  Probably some Shutter The Screaming Service movie.  They have SEVERAL new ones to watch. Wow SEVERAL?  NOW YOU'RE TALKING MY LANGUAGE.  Anyway just did The Chore Of A Lifetime by moving some plastic chair from one room to another room.  Bathroom was 2nd room!  It's a Shower Chair.  Ya put it in the shower so you can take a shower without standing.  Hmm why couldn't you take a bath.  Because you want SHOWER water not bathwater.  Why can't you just sit down in the bath and take a shower.  Hmm Interesting Counter-point.  You can sit down in the shower without a bonus chair.  In fact you SHOULD sit down in the shower without a bonus chair.  It's fun!  I feel like I've done this in the past for one reason or another!
     YEAH.  What if you wanna stand on the plastic chair in the shower so you're at eye level with the shower.  Hmm.  I feel like I'd be ABOVE eye level with the shower if I were standing on ShowerChair and I'm a short guy.  FINALLY IT'S ABOUT TIME I'M HIGHER THAN WATER LEVEL.  I've been waiting for this scenario my entire life!  Ugh.  I want to do a bit about What kind of people do the shower with THIS setting but I have no way to sufficiently describe the different shower settings.  If I was able to send you a Motion Picture of several standard shower water pressure/shapes/etc I could easily be like Who Likes THIS ONE AM I Right!?!  But I can't describe it 100%  Suffice to say it's one of the Least Pressurized but it's also the shapes of the waterfall that gets my grits going.  Getting my grits going?  That sounds like a positive thing.  But it's not.  It's a negative thing!
     Anyway.  Looking forward to Coffee #2 of the day to remember with Act #3 of the day to forget.  You wanna remember the good stuff and forget the bad stuff.  Coffee = good stuff.  Act III's = bad stuff.  You heard it here first.  I think it was The Great Gatsby Writer who said There are no second acts in American Life and there are REALLY, DEFINITELY, NO CHANCE, third acts in American Life.  What's that guy's name.  Oh.  F Scott Fitzgeralds, right?  Better LTURQ to confirm.  Hmm accurate and GET THIS he wrote The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.  I assumed it was some dumb movie producer who came up with it because it's a dumb movie.  Based on a short story!  By a real author!  Go figure!  Then come back.  Once you're done figuring.  There's more paragraphs to be read!
What else is going on.  There's a third act in Benjamin Button's life.  It's Him Being A Baby.  Hmm.  Makes ya think.  No it doesn't.  Interesting Counter-Point.  What else is going on.  I assume the F in F Scott Fitzgerald is for Fuck.  FUCK Scott Fitzgerald.  Sort of a take-off of L. L. Cool J.  Either because he wants ladies to fuck him or he knows someone else just called Scott Fitzgerald who isn't him that he really hates.  FUCK THIS GUY, etc.  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna take a bath soon without any sort of chair.  Hmm.  One scenario I forgot to cover was taking a bath with the chair.  Gotta be hard!  For the water level to reach above your legs it'd be overflowing the tub.  And thus wouldn't reach you at all.  Until the entire room is full of water.  Once the entire room is covered in water eventually it will go higher and higher and engulf you too.  EVENTUALLY.  If you've got the time for that.  This could take a very long time.
     Ugh.  Successfully started doing push ups and sit ups yesterday!  Now the question is whether I can start a streak today.  Two days in a row?  VERY possible as of now.  Also it wasn't too hard!  I did three sets of 15 push ups and sit-ups each over the course of the day.  15 and 15 at ONE time.  Then doing it again SEVERAL HOURS LATER.  Then once more hours after that!  That's it.  EASY.  Just keep doing that every day.  That's all I need to do!  WONDERFUL now my life will be tangibly better somehow one would imagine.  Ugh.  Maybe some sort of video game today.  Either a real video game or Guitar Learning video game.  I can have fun either way!  I could also Not Have Fun either way.  That's why I haven't done it lately!  I calculated I'd have less than Zero fun.  Then again that's only calculations.  We can't know for sure unless I actually try!  GREAT I'm gonna take a bath break now. 




I Lost Track Of What's Going On

    Hey friends!  Took a shower.  Didn't even overflow the reservoir that is my bathtub such that the new ultimate reservoir became my bathroom!  ALRIGHT that's halfway there to a successful day.  Didn't flood the house!  What else is going on.  Although maybe I set into motion the flooding of the house.  Possible that after turning off Bath Nozzle there was still drips where there was a single drip of water falling from faucet into bathtub maybe once every thirty seconds.  I HOPE that stops soon.  But if it doesn't then in a million years my bathtub might be close to overflowing!  Gotta prepare NOW for a million years from now.  We don't wanna leave this to future generations that's not fair to them!  What else is going on.  HMM ESPN/MLB has a headline Giants Cap Season To Remember, Clinch NL West.  SEASON TO REMEMBER?  I wonder where they go that idea!  I demand COMPENSATION.
     Hey time to re-up with soda and coffee at the same time.
  I think I can manage making an upwards trip with both as opposed to having to walk up stairs twice, once with each.  Hmm.  Not only might I have to make two upwards trips but that's also an extra... ONE downwards trip.  Not two.  Wait a second.  Now I'm confused.  Suffice to say I will have to go up and down the stairs possibly several times all things considered.  OKAY I just made separate trips for coffee and soda.  So that sounds like TWO trips, right?  It can't be that easy!  I think there's more complicated math calculations here than what it looks like on the surface!  Anyway.  I may MAY have gotten enough soda to last me the entire week comfortably before re-upping with Super market.  ALSO it helps that I got THREE snapples instead of Two.  Helps A LOT.  Kinda makes me wonder why I haven't been doing this all along.  Didn't even OCCUR to me.  I couldn't fathom even in my dreams getting more snapple.  HEY SNAPPLE IS CALORIES THAT'S WHY.  Five calories for eight fluid ounces?  At this rate I will fill up my Bathroom Reservoir with Calories in a million years or something!  I lost track whether I care if the little sense this makes is barely enough sense or not that I'm okay with it or not!
     Okay.  What else is going on.  Owen Wilson per my memory was in I SPY where he plays some sort of Spy I Wanna Say.  One can only assume that's what threw my Mom off in thinking he was James Bond.  Also one can only assume it's from 2003 and my back-up guess is 2002.  LMLTURQ.  2002.  Eh back-up guess isn't so bad.  I'm neither proud nor ashamed of getting it with my back-up guess!  It's a good compromise between pride and shame.  2nd guesses being accurate.  What else going on.  I assume I-Spy is some sort of Apple Product which spies on people.  Oh so you mean ALL APPLE PRODUCTS?!?!  Gottem.  Anyway what else is going on.  I dunno if Apple is singled out as a technology company that particularly spies on people.  I assume all technology companies spy on people at least moderately.  I just don't know if in popular thought Apple is one of the main offenders.  Hey great good for them.
Yeah!  Probably gonna take a solid roughly hour long break after Entry and before next walk.  Imagine all I could accomplish in that time!  Off the top of my head the most productive thing to do would be to watch half or even TWO THIRDS of a movie.  I also briefly thought about watching A Television Show but that's slightly less productive.  Didn't come up with any other alternate idea yet.  Probably never will!  That's life!  What else is life.  Lots of things.  Too many things to cover all of them in this paragraph.  Especially since the paragraph is already half or even TWO THIRDS done.  Hmm.  I think it's odd that we had all the excitement of the last game of the MLB season yesterday and then there's no playoff game until tomorrow.  They're really taking a big risk that people won't lose interest after one day without a game.  I've already lost half my interest and the day isn't even half over!  Depending on how you measure the day!  If it's from 12 AM to 12 AM then the day is over half over on account of being past noon.  So the point is How Does Major League Baseball Measure Days?
     Last paragraph of the day!  Wonderful.  I say the day starts when you wake up and ends when you go to sleep!  That's MY hot take.  Anyway what else is going on.  Just finished my coffee.  It was pretty good!  I look forward to having more tomorrow.  Good to have stuff to look forward to!  That makes Present Life relatively tolerable!  I can't wait to get blood test results from Endocrine Appointment.  That's another thing to look forward to.  Normally out of 200 or 300 separate Levels Of Stuff specifically determined I have 2-3 ON AVERAGE things outside the healthy range.  Can't wait to find out how I'm doing This Period Of Three Months Since Last Time.  I'm gonna be honest part of me WANTS to be outside healthy range of things.  It means I'm a REBEL.  I go my own way!  Most people want a healthy cholesterol but NOT ME.  I FORGET WHY.  I might have said why earlier a few sentences ago but now I Forget Again.  Anyway what else.  Hey the entry is over.  See ya later.

-12:44 P.M.




Sunday, October 3, 2021

Hey This Is Relatable

    Hello friends.  Walked through a big cloud of tobacco smoke today!  I saw it coming and my first instinct was oh no gotta not breathe for a few seconds I don't wanna become re-addicted!  Then my second thought was I'LL BE FINE lets suck this up have a blast.  And I went with option #2!  I didn't have much of a blast nor did I get re-addicted as far as I know.  But it was okay I guess!  Anyway here I am!  To write more paragraphs!  Got a nice BIG glass glass going on today.  The ones that are 3/4ths the size are all dirty!  Well I wouldn't say DIRTY.  I'd say not clean.  They're not covered in mold or anything!  Just been used!  The point is Oh no now I'm gonna drink soda at a faster rate.  I'm gonna finish the glasses in the same amount of time no matter how big they are.  Oh well that's part of life.  Glass stuff.  Yep checks out.  Anyway.  Got SNL to watch later!  We're talking in the Afternoon!  Afternoon?  WOW!
Watched the Horror Movie Anthology Cats Eye 2 nights ago + yesterday.  Pretty okay!  I enjoyed it in a positive sense.  Most of the stuff I see I enjoy in a negative sense!  So this was a welcome change of pace.  Also that cat in the movie is CUTE let's talk about it.  I wouldn't mind petting HER.  Or HIM.  Maybe not if its a HIM.  I don't swing that way!  Either way I can't take care of a cat.  Too much work!  Ya gotta FEED IT.  Ya gotta CLEAN UP ITS SHIT.  Ya gotta TUCK IT IN AT NIGHT.  Anyway what else is going on.  How come you can train cats to shit in litter boxes but babies only know how to shit in diapers.  A baby is smarter than a cat!  Train that baby to crawl to the litter box.  How hard can this be?!  Probably pretty hard or else everyone would be doing it.  Anyway.  Then again you don't want baby to eat litter.  Unless it's full of vitamins!!!  Interesting counter-point. 
     Cool!  Gonna cut my hair with Papa's assistance in about a week.  Also shave at the same time!  Solid half a year since I last cut my hair with Papa's assistance.  Now it's time to FINISH THE JOB once and for all.  Gotta imagine hair will stop growing after this hair cutting experience to remember.  Finally get the message its not wanted! Then again maybe it will be wanted some day.  Better let it keep growing and I'll cut it if I want so I have OPTIONS in the future.  Anyway My Mom's cousin is having a surprise ZOOM wedding anniversary surprise party From Family this afternoon.  DAMNIT THERE GOES THE SURPRISE.  Also is that my second cousin?  My guess?  Maybe!  I dunno what it is so I described it to you the only way I know how!  Either way they're old.  Also the Wife I walked in on In Bathroom a few years ago at Christmas Celebration.  So there's that!  What kind of idiot has a bathroom without a lock.  My uncle and aunt.  Those kinds of idiots!
     Oh well that's part of life I guess.  Hmm maybe my Uncle and Aunt owned Psycho's hotel and that's why the lady couldn't lock her bathroom while taking a shower.  Uhh pretty sure Psycho owned the hotel.  That's a main part of the plot.  Maybe Psycho owned the hotel but my Uncle and Aunt were SILENT PARTNERS.  Maybe!  We can't say for sure as of now with the information available to us.  We can't even say for sure with some of the information unavailable to us!  I would guess.  I don't have that information obviously.  What else is going on.  I feel good for The Mets that they get to take a nice break after today.  And those in the Mets Franchise that mostly work during the season and have time off during the off-season.  YOU EARNED IT have some fun and relax!  It makes me happy!  Come back next year RARING to go.  RARING?  That can't be the right word.  It IS a word according to Microsoft FrontPage which sounds wrong already.  But it ALSO being the right word?  Gonna have to LTURQ.  NOPE raring to go IS the right word.  I was confident I was getting it wrong by a letter or two!  Should have trusted my gut instinct.  Now I look like a real idiot!  Kind of like before.  But now even MORE.
Fifth paragraph already!  Coffee after this!  It's Raring to go because it's RARE that you have this much spunk and enthusiasm and whatnot.  To Go!  Hmm.  I feel like there was a Dunkin Donuts when I was high school aged that was combined with a sandwich shop called TOGO because you could get it to go???  And they were both a drive through?  And I got it several times on the way home from high school??  Better LTURQ.  TOGO?  Never heard of that in the last 15 years.  YEP IT'S REAL.  Not sure if its still there where I think it was.  Either way hmm what kind of sandwich did I used to like from TOGOS.  I guess we'll never know.  We don't have a TIME MACHINE where I can go back in time and find out what sandwich I ordered a dozen times over the course of a couple of years!  Although if we did that's Priority #1!  First things first!  Let's get the important stuff out of the way!  Hey time for coffee.
     This is good stuff!
  You may have never heard of TOGO'S.  Now you know better!  Also I feel like it took me a long time to figure out the meaning behind the name. TOGOS what the Hell is that dumb name was my main thought for most of the time I knew TOGOS.  Then at some magical moment I realized OH RIGHT TO GO.  I'm getting it TO GO.  GOTCHA.  Isn't all service food to go.  You don't go up to a counter at Mcdonalds and order it and then eat right by the cash register.  Maybe you do!  Maybe that's a style some McDonalds have some places in the world.  Sit right up at the counter.  It's not impossible!  And it sounds pretty fun!  Anyway let's get cracking on that for New York Locations.  Sure. 
    I've eaten at separate counters at McDonalds.  Up against a window or some other sort of wall.  Just not right where the cashiers are!  Oh well that's life.  HEY there must be a Blunder Years Episode II at this point!  Forgot all about that!  I liked the first episode because it makes ya THINK.  What's this all about Hmm I Wonder.  Anyway what else is going on.  Maybe watch more Da God's Honest Truth with Rapist Magillicutty.  HEY THAT'S NOT FAIR.  He's only been CREDIBLY ACCUSED of rape.  I haven't seen all the facts yet!  Haven't seen any of the facts yet!  I don't even remember his name!  Apparently I think it's magillicutty!  And his first name is Rapist?!?!  What would the odds of that be?  What with him turning out to be a rapist.  VERY unlikely.  Anyway I have no interest in Wedding Anniversary Party.  But my Mom said she might need me to help her set up joining the zoom meaning.  Finally it's ME TO THE RESCUE.  I get to be a productive re: Helping Family!  Amazing.
Eighth paragraph!  Wonderful.  Yesterday Mom seemed to be 95% better than before when she was very under the weather.  Great!  That'll show the booster shot for trying to make her feel bad!  The jokes on YOU in the end!  Huh?  Oh, right.  What else.  I still feel like the area around my Flu Shot is 2-5% sore.  Oh well that's how you know it's working!  Also I would have assumed its working anyway.  That's why I got it!  What else is going on.  I tried watching an episode of Tales From The Cryptkeeper which is a cartoon spin-off of Tales From The Crypt for children.  But it features the Cryptkeeper's Real Voice!  Anyway I watched a solid 5 minutes of one episode (4 of which were an introduction by The Cryptkeeper) and I couldn't get into it!  I thought even if it's not for adults the plots would be interesting.  But this first 60 seconds of a story had nothing interesting in it plotwise!  See you in HELL Tales From The Cryptkeeper!
What else is going on.  Ninth paragraph.  What a wonderful world we live in.  Where I can already be up to the ninth paragraph for the day.  So little left relatively speaking!  Then again I haven't written very good paragraphs so far it feels like.  So I'm deep into a BAD entry.  Which is bad because I have less time to turn it around!  Then again ya get what you pay for.  NOTHIN'.  Sounds about right.  Maybe you should be paying me.  I can put this behind a pay wall!  Gotta imagine it's POSSIBLE I would solidly get 1 or 2 Pity Subscriptions from family.  Even if they don't read this.  I'd have to let them know specifically some other way there's a pay wall for website and I'd appreciate their engagement.  Otherwise they'd never even know it's a possibility to take pity on me with subscriptions!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gotta imagine my Mom's I wanna say 83 year old cousin whose married for 50 years is reading this and is chomping at the bit to give me a pity subscription!  In which case SORRY ABOUT RUINING THE SURPRISE PARTY.  Gotta imagine this entry, "Drops," roughly 45 minutes before it happens.  WHY OH WHY couldn't I have waited another hour to Publish?!!?
Last paragraph of the act!  What else is going on.  I feel like this guy was in World War II.  That would make him more than 82.  Maybe he was in Korean War.  Either way there's no way of knowing.  He can't have been in World War II.  He's not A HUNDRED.  Anyway what else is going on.  Ya know what?  Maybe he was in Korean War but was stationed in Europe for some reason.  Huh?  Why?  I dunno that's the army's business not mine!  What else is going on.  Need some army stationed in Europe during Korean War!  What if Europeans get the wrong idea.  See Korea being at war and are like HEY WE WANT IN ON THAT.  Then my Mom's cousin is there to violently suppress any civil uprisings.  Sounds about right.  Speaking of my Mom's cousin and Cats, we got our cat from My Mom's cousin!  He was a veterinarian or something.  Probably veterinarian.  But somewhat possible something else to do with animals and pets.  Anyway we were in the market for a cat and he gave us one that he had gotten as a stray somehow!  Half a year old!  So that's great.  I feel like he got her off the highway.  That might have just been in my imagination.  When I heard she was a stray I just pictured her on a highway running perpendicularly successfully avoiding getting run over.  Hey great that's great.  I'm gonna take a walk now.




My Website Get Your Own

    WHAT DO YOU MEAN MAGILLICUTTY ISN'T A WORD.  Any word that starts with a capital letter is a word.  Could be a last name!  Who the Hell are you to pass judgment on last names.  You can get in serious legal trouble by besmirching someone's name!  Also I'm talking to Microsoft FrontPage.  Not you.  This isn't your fault.  You're an innocent bystander in all of this!  Great just great.  Are Magillccutties females?  I feel like if you're using a generic last name Magillicutty that might be a feminine last name.  What the Hell is a feminine last name.  Magillicutty!  Oh okay I see.    Also I'm spelling this different each time I say it.  By not trying to spell it consistently at all!  Just letting my fingers do the talking without much input from my brain each time.  Anyway what else is going on.  It's possible we will finally get Paper Towels today.  Alright sure.  That's a good story.  It is!  Now in Future Times I can return to this entry and remember oh right my life revolved around accepting paper towel delivery.  Now that I read this it rings some sort of bell.
Also THEY will ring MY front door bell when it's here!  Probably!  Solid 25% chance they won't!  Anyway what else is going on.  Also that's my only door bell!  On the front door!  We had one bell as a family and we decided to hook it up to front door.  I feel it was the right decision.  Pays off all the time!  Great.  Do I have TOGO any place this upcoming week.  I don't think so.  Oh well that's life.  GOOD life.  Why bother going places when you can not go places.  Unless that place is a combination Dunkin Donuts and Sandwich Shop.  Hey maybe one of you wants a donut.  The other of you wants a sandwich.  Until now you'd be up a creek without a river!  Unless you get a sandwich from Dunkin Donuts.  Gotta imagine they serve half a dozen different sandwiches not even counting breakfast sandwiches.  And if you count breakfast sandwiches gotta imagine they serve 16-18 sandwiches.  BUT this was 15 years ago.  15 years ago Dunkin Donuts might have served maybe 2 breakfast sandwiches and 0 other sandwiches.  And possibly ZERO sandwiches in the middle of the day.  It was a simpler time when fast food restaurants knew their place.  Now they wall wanna cover all the bases and be something they're not.  Stick to the basics!  Do what you know!  Great this paragraph is solidly over.
Yeah!  Watching more The Sampsons.  I like how I'm halfway into season 15 and I'm solidly up to the point where I'm like well these are all recent episodes. Not from my childhood.  From my adulthood.  I feel like this debuted 4 years ago.  These are from 17 years ago.  But it still feels fresh and new!  I blame the COLORS.  I don't know why.  I really do, though!  I feel like the strange bright colors are mixing me up in my head re: How Time Works.  And what is recent and what is not.  And what recent means and doesn't mean.  Anyway that's life I guess.  Oh well.  Gotta imagine the more years the pass the more Simpsons Voices will die.  At some point they're gonna have to close down the show when enough people are dead.  OR they can do the Looney Tunes thing and re-cast dead people with living voiceover character imitators.  Hey great they got options good for them.
     Penultimate paragraph of act II!
  Wonderful.  Or each time a voice dies they replace those characters with new characters.  So overtime we transition to completely new characters but SLOWLY.  So we don't even notice.  It's a few characters here and there!  Until some point where there's no more Simpsons.  And it's all Millhouses or something.  Current Millhouse's grandkids.  They're the main characters by 2070.  You heard it here first.  Presumably Lisa would be the grandmother in that situation, right?  You want SOME link to The Simpsons Themselves.  Makes a lot of sense in my book.  Hmm gonna have to start a new book.  This current one isn't so great.  Things that don't make sense in reality make sense in the book.  What a worthless book.  Anyway what else is going on.  Also yes I know the first 33 seasons of The Simpsons absolutely no time has passed.  But this all changed in 2027!  Hmm if Millhouse is 10 in 2027 and starts aging normally a year at a time he will only be 53 in 2070.  A little young for grand children.  You'd think so wouldn't you.  Huh.
     Maybe he ages TWO years at a time.
  Ever think of that Hot Shot?!  Anyway I got one more paragraph to write before bathing.  Wonderful!  Maybe my Mom's cousin was in the Veterinary Core In Korean War Stationed In Europe.  Makes sense. Someone's gotta train and care for Attack Dogs.  Hmm if they're in Europe they should probably have Defense Dogs not Attack Dogs.  Then again the best defense is a good offense.  What else is going on.  How much of a Veterinarian's job is Putting Down Animals.  50%?  Gotta imagine half he time they're either like well this animal can't be saved and/or sometimes well this animal PROBABLY could be saved but not really worth the hassle.  Either way every other animal they gotta kill.  Most people think when they're kids they wanna be a veterinarian because they love animals.  Probably should be the other way around!  The main thing you do is kill animals so it's better if you go into that career being on board with that aspect.  Hmm gonna have to ask Mom's Cousin about this on Zoom.  Theoretically.  Not in practice.  I Won't Attend At All in practice.




Fine We Can Share The Website

    Wonderful.  Got some snapple going.  Gonna have coffee next paragraph.  GREAT we're all caught up.  Tomorrow is my Brother's Birthday.  He's turning OLD.  That seems to happen every year!  I can't remember the last time he had a birthday and I was like hey he seems YOUNGER now.  I guess that's the direction life goes for all of us.  Most of us.  Not those with Benjamin Button Disorder.  That's gotta be really rare though so it's not even something we need to take into account for the most part.  Anyway.  I shaved about 4 months ago.  Not completely!  Mostly!  The setting on Shaving Razor that came with Haircutting Apparatus only goes down to Very Close Shave.  No setting for Complete Shave!  Seems like a big oversight.  How hard could it have been to just add One More Setting-- Complete Hair Removal.  Either way Close Enough!  I'll survive and whatnot.  Unless I slit my throat by accident.  Gotta imagine there's a 5% chance that happens.  Oh well you gotta take risks if you wanna win big in life.  Huh.
     Yeah!  What else is going on.  Gonna start doing sit ups and push ups every day.  Specifically sit ups.  Feel that would contour my belly appearance as I lose the final 10-15 pounds.  Based on NOTHING but thinking hey that kinda makes sense in my head.  Solidly 20% chance that's how things might work physiologically.  Couldn't hurt.  Maybe it could hurt.  Probably won't, though!  What else is going on.  Not gonna take a walk until roughly an hour from this moment.  Gotta help parents watch ZOOM.  It involves them entering TWO SEPARATE NUMBERS that's too complicated for them.  Meeting ID number?  PASSWORD?  Look one number is one thing but two numbers is literally 100% more complicated.  That's the most amount more complicated it could be!  What if it was three numbers.  That'd be 200% more complicated.  YOU CAN'T HAVE MORE THAN 100% WHERE THE HELL DID YOU LEARN MATH.
Wonderful.  I can solidly watch The Blunder Years Episode II To Remember after Entry and before Helping Out With Zoom.  PROBABLY.  If I have to watch commercials then it's a little bit of a  tighter fit.  But if I don't then very easy to fit it in!  YEAH.  Get off my back about it.  A little confused why Michael Soprano isn't playing young Don Cheadle in the show, though.  Seems kind of strange that they'd go in a different direction than that.  Did I say Michael Soprano by accident or on purpose?  It was by accident!  Now you know the horrifying truth.  Ugh.  Did I watch seven minutes of Major League: Back To The Minors POSSIBLY FROM 1997 after bathing while drying off?  Yes yes I did.  Backup guess is 1999.  Third guess is 1998.  Let's LTURQ!  OH NO IT WAS 1998.  I just BARELY got it with my third guess but that's not something to be proud of at all.  Well there goes my pride.  Gone now once and for all.  DAMNIT I hate it when that happens.
Penultimate paragraph.  I guess after that blunder of a guess I'M going back to the minors!  The minors of people who compete to determine what years movies were released as some sort of contest competing competition.  Hey good news I MADE IT TO THE TRIPLE A.  That's the highest in the minors you can be!  Why, if the major league team suffers a dozen injuries in one night I can easily be called up until half of those injured players are ready to return!  ALRIGHT now we're talking!  What else is going on.  Thinking about interesting breakfasts I can have when I'm done dieting to lose weight.  And my breakfasts will be 2.5 times larger than current breakfast.  Could be A SLICE OF PIZZA.  Could be a single LARGE DONUT.  Those are two of the most, "Out There," but, "Reasonably Possible," ideas I had.  I'd come up with a third one but I don't feel like it right now.  Hmm. 
     Last paragraph of the day.  Cool!  I have lots of other Breakfast Ideas but they're more reasonable.  Donut is a reasonable breakfast.  Lots of dumb people will have a donut for breakfast.  Good point.  It's as dumb as pizza but presumably much more common!  Anyway.  HEY Paper towels just arrived.  In a box!  Big box!  Even bigger than I was expecting.  Also LIGHT BIG BOX.  That's the best kind of big box there is.  Re: Heaviness of it!  What else is going on.  Gotta imagine there's one to two more things going on to write about for the rest of the entry.  I'm leaning towards ONE thing but that's still pretty good.  Anyway.  No more chores for the day!  other than walking, eating, sit ups and push ups.  And Ultimately Sleeping.  And Watching TV.  Basically everything I have to do is a chore but it's all worth it because I get to do it again tomorrow.  Hmm.  Okay I'll be back tomorrow.

-12:14 P.M.




Saturday, October 2, 2021

I Don't Have Time For This

    What's up friends.  It's me again!  A.K.A the guy you were probably expecting.  One day someone else will write a surprise entry.  I estimate in 18 years.  It will take me roughly 15 years to make a friend and 3 years to set into motion the conditions that lead him to writing an entry.  OR HER.  No reasons ladies can't write entries.  Or be my friend!  Hmm some good reason it'd be hard to get a lady to be my friend.  Well this is in 15 years.  Who knows what life will be like in 15 years.  I DO.  It will be roughly 2036.  THAT'S what life will be like.  Sounds about right.  HEY I watched The Sopranos movie.  And I had a Sopranos dream before waking up!  I don't remember exactly what happened but I feel it involved Young But Not Too Young Tony Soprano RUNNING and or IN A CAR.  He was in transport somehow.  This is the dream.  Not the movie.
Solid chance he's running in the movie.  I can think of at least one scene where he's In Transport.  Anyway pretty good movie!  I agree with the makers that it would have been better In Theater.  Oh well I watched it on THE HOME Box Office.  Maximum!  That's pretty convenient!  Anyway I feel bad for Michael Gandolfini because he did a good job but not an AMAZING job.  So what should critics say?  They can't gush over him but they can't say it was a let down either.  Wait a second.  I don't feel bad for Michael Gandolfini.  I feel bad for the critics!  Either way I give him a SEVEN POINT FOUR out of 10.  Amazing.  Which is still very good for a nice young adult man like him.  It was good enough I can easily see him getting more roles!  So again No Worries for Michael Gandolfini, and A Lot of sympathy for film critics.  Also I'm not 100% sure what this film was about.
Maybe if I was paying more attention I'd know.  Oh it's about referencing The Future.  That's part of it!  The best part!  What else is going on.  The Sopranos future.  Who cares about The Earth's Future A.K.A the present A.K.A also more accurately The Earth's Future from the 2000's.  Huh.  Mom definitely seemed healthier yesterday.  That's good news.  Because it's easier on me!  Less worries FOR ME.  Good stuff!  Happy with when I woke up and got up and ended up at this point in the day.  It's a nice solid time right now for where I'm at in the day!  That's a great recurring subject.  WHEN DID I WAKE UP AND HOW DO I FEEL ABOUT IT.  Last few days I woke up pretty early and I feel GREAT about it.  Now you know!  What times have you been waking up and how does that make you feel?  E-mail me at mankindguy at gmail dot com.  That's my real e-mail not a joke e-mail!  You could probably have guessed that based on there being no Jokey Elements!  I wanna hear about your mornings send in them e-mails.
What else.  HMM what are the top 5 standard most popular e-mail domains.  Gmail feels like a classic over the last decade and a half.  What else is up there.  OUTLOOK is number one?  I dunno about that.  I thought outlook was a program where you can read all your e-mail accounts together.  I guess they also have their own e-mail account service.  Good for them.  Anyway any other stand outs in the top 10???  AOL Mail still clocking in at number 7.  Great.  The other ones I don't care about.  Well there were a few that were funny words I never heard before.  Those were Zoho and Yandex.  First I thought Yandex was funny and Zoho wasn't that funny then I realized Zoho is pretty funny and Yandex is also still funny so they're both funny.  Good topics.  This is great!  What kind of email domains do you use.  Send me e-mails specifying in the subject line AND in the main content of the e-mail what the domain of your e-mail address is.  So I know what the e-mail domain is TWO WAYS.  AND ONLY TWO WAYS.
Last paragraph before coffee!  Which is pretty good because I Like Getting Done With Things.  Makes me happy!  How did people use e-mail before the internet?  Must have been pretty tough.  They could get e-mail sent directly to their house.  A hard copy of the e-mail.  Oh that sounds convenient.  Now I'm wondering how people get hard copies of E-mail nowadays through e-mail.  They get soft copies sent electronically over the internet.  Oh okay.  Never heard the term soft copies before.  Never heard a lot of things before!  This is one example.  All mail is Electronic Mail once the mail hearses or whatever they're called are electric vehicles.  In ESSENCE the electricity is getting your mail there.  Wow what a crazy future.  I feel like I used to get regular mail from friends.  Honestly.  Definitely stuff like birthday party invitations and well wishes for your birthday party.  That was standard.  But I also feel like a few times it was just like HEY WHAT'S UP.  And this is from people I see in school every day.  Anyway that's great.
     My Dad pitched to me an idea of how I could justify getting Booster Shot.  I could just say I live with 2 elderly people, 1 immunocompromised, and I am Some Sort Of CAREGIVER.  Which is partly true.  I give some care.  Partly!  Theoretically I mean.  FEELINGwise I partly care.  Tangibly I'm not so sure but either way sure whatever I guess what else is going on.  I'd get shot if it didn't require me to justify myself at all.  Once I start having to argue in my favor I feel like that's too much of a hassle!  What else is going on.  Sixth paragraph! I don't believe it.  What kind of fun stuff do I have in store for today.  There's a new Saturday Night Life tonight!  Past my bedtime!  Watch that sucker tomorrow afternoon.  What can I do before my bed time though.  That's the real question!  Hmm.  Watch some sort of FILM?  I'm a fan of FILM.  I like the part where they talk to each other and I can sort of tune out.  They're not talking to me.  I don't need to pay too much attention!  Their dialogue will continue no matter how much or how little I'm invested in it!
     What else is going on.  Finished The Ringing II.  Finished The Road To Them Perditions.  Finished a third movie yesterday specifically one would imagine.  Not including movies I also started yesterday.  Hmm.  That might be it!  Oh well that's still a pretty good accomplishment.  Anyway what is going on in the wide world of sports.  Once all playoff spots are settled in Major League Baseball I will determine which teams I am rooting for in relation to how much I am rooting for the other teams.  Either rank them from most rooting for to least rooting for overall, or look at each individual series and pick a team to root for specifically for that series.  INTERESTING.  The 2nd way is more intuitive but the 1st way is also more intuitive.  Either way I feel like the 2nd way is more STANDARD and the way you would go about it PROBABLY but the first is not without its charms!  Either way what's going on?  Oh right.  While I was typing Major League Baseball I thought of Major Motion Pictures and briefly thought maybe I could figure out some sort of dumb thing to say making that connection.  Oh well too late now.
Eighth paragraph!  I don't believe it!  I feel like for years I've been reading articles about how shitty Minor Leaguerses lives are.  At some point gotta imagine they'd address that, right?  I'd imagine that sure.  It's fun!  What else is going on.  Pretty sure I've never been to a Minor League Baseball Game.  Hmm.  I think there's a Staten Island Yankees team which I may have gone to once?  Better LTURQ.  There were Staten Island Yankees team from 1999 to 2020.  Nah that can't be it can it?  I was thinking before 1999.  BUT 1999-2002 IS on the upper end of possibilities of when and if this may or may not have possibly or impossibly taken place or not taken place.  So I got going for me.  Hmm any other sports I've seen.  Professional Major League Sports.  Nothing comes to mind!  Makes sense.  I don't think it was the case.  If it's not the case of course nothing will come to mind!  Then again I dunno this paragraph is over Isn't That Enough For You?!?
Penultimate paragraph of the Act!  What a wonderful day today is turning out to be.  I'm solidly accomplishing the same Bulk Amount Of Writing as every other day.  SURE it's worse than most days and most days are worse than you'd want in the first place HOWEVER it's still SOMETHING.  Kind of.  You might not even consider it Something.  I DO THOUGH.  Wonderful.  How easy is it to get into the groove of reading the entries.  That's what I've been wondering the last couple of days.  It's one thing to think about whether it's funny or not or entertaining or not or anything like that.  On a more basic level-- is it DIFFICULT to go from sentence to sentence on account of it Not Being Well Thought Out and Stream Of Conciousnesslike?  In which case OH NO.  Then again on the other case ALRIGHT NOT BAD.  In the third case This Is What I mean these sentences make no sense!  Oh well too late to go back now.  Not too late to start Trying Harder To Make Sense.  Yeah you'd think so wouldn't you.
Last paragraph of the act!  Also I get excited in Writing about things you don't care about.  I'm genuinely thrilled it's the last paragraph of the act!  So much that I have to exclaim it explicitly!  You can just skip over those sentences because Who Cares.  Oh well what else is going on.  Maybe you get off on my explicit exclamations about how far I am into the entry.  In which case that's great news we're both coming out on top!  YEAH.  My mom is encouraging me to buy new clothes for my updated body type.  Shirts and stuff!  I feel like I'm supposed to start wearing shirts that aren't t-shirts.  Adults don't wear short sleeve t-shirts every day that may or may not say stuff and or have cool designs.  But what kind of shirts DO they wear?  Well this is easy LONG sleeve t-shirts.  Also Winter is coming.  Winter is definitely the season for long sleeve t shirts!  Also they're called t shirts because they form a T when worn properly.  Just like every other shirt.  OH well.  Hey that's it for now.  Be back soon!




Now Wait Just A Minute

    Hello friends.  Time to write more paragraphs.  That happens ALL THE TIME.  Especially early in the day!  Then there tends to be a break in the paragraphs the 2nd 2/3rds of the day.  WOW if only that time was now!  It will be soon!  I like those odds!  Anyway what else is going on.  Gonna take a shower today!  I'm not 100% sure why I feel so strongly about this but I do.  It's time to mix things up and whatnot.  Also why couldn't Psycho Victim just lock her bathroom door while showering.  Maybe Psycho rigged the door so there is no lock.  No way of knowing if that's explicitly referred to in the movie.  Well no way of knowing without watching the movie.  How about asking someone who watched the movie.  Some sort of Film Historian.  I don't know any Film Historians!  You Don't?!?!  WHY NOT?!?!  Anyway I got that going on for me.  I feel like I know 70% of The History Of Film.  I know ALL the most popular Titles.  Many of the most popular actors and even some directors.  Basically 70% of EVERYTHING I already know.
Wow 70%?  That's a C-!  Not sure about that.  Could be a D+!  I'm rounding up to a C-.  I'm a C-.  Sure why not.  Also my area of expertise is What Year Films Were Released.  Again, do I know all of it?  NO!  But do I know more than your standard person?  YES MUCH MORE!  1991 for example.  LOTS of films released in 1991.  Well I'm impressed!  Anyway what else is going on.  If Back To The Future Present Year was This Year the past year would have been 1991.  Thirty years ago.  WAIT A SECOND that can't be right.  I'm a teenager NOW and I can REMEMBER 1991 completely.  Something in this math doesn't add up.  I vaguely remember 1991.  Gotta imagine I watched some TV as a 2 year old.  Hmm rings some sort of bell.  Anyway what else is going on!  Also gotta imagine I round down to a 17 year old instead of rounding up to a 46 or 47 year old, however old The Adult Class is in Back To The Future.  COULD BE 48 YEARS OLD.  WOW!!!!!
     Great!  Just great!  Wait a second I'm legitatemly in the middle!  Fifteen years either way.  I was going into this premise assuming yeah I probably am closer to adult than teenager.  Now I see the error of my ways.  I'M AS CLOSE TO TEENAGER AS ADULT.  This is the best news I've gotten ALL MORNING.  Also the only news.  Except for the e-mail domain names of Wazoo and Yuckle.  Those are new to me too!  What else is going on.  The idea of that is that a year before Back To The Future Present takes place, Marty McFly's parents weren't QUITE adults yet.  They didn't exactly mature into adults until they turned 47.  YEAH THAT SOUNDS FAIR.  Get off my back about it.  You're no adult until you're 47!  I think that sounds about right.  We just need a new word for 22-46 year olds.  THE BEST people how about that.
YEAH!  Also sure 20 and 21 year olds are still teenagers.  They're ZEROTEEN and ELEVENTEEN.  I feel very strongly about this.  Well great this is the penultimate paragraph of the act.  I'm no caregiver to my parents.  I am very much a careTAKER.  I give them 5% of care and they give me 50% of care.  That's a surplus of 45% care going in MY direction not theirs.  Hmm if I need care doesn't that essentially theoretically qualify me for vaccine.  I'VE GOT PROBLEMS THUS GIMME THAT BOOSTER SHOT.  That's the premise I'm currently operating under.  What else is going on.  I think I MAY be rooting for the Los Angeles Los Algenelers in the major league baseball 2021 playoffs to remember.  Los Angels DODGERS there we go.  Not sure why.  I just have a gut feeling sure why not them makes sense.
HEY final paragraph of the act! This just flew by didn't it.  YES it flew by for Me The Reader because I just skimmed it quickly looking for anything worthwhile and I Saw Nothing so it took NO TIME AT ALL!!!  Hey great I'm glad things are working out for you.  YEAH.  Figure I'll enjoy the shower.  Try to set the water heat level at something I'm comfortable with.  Off the top of my head, something I don't feel is too hot AND something I don't feel is too cold.  Seems like the way to go.  You heard it here first.  Err on the side of Too Hot though.  Is that standard?  Gotta imagine that's 80% of how people approach shower heat levels.  Better slightly too hot than too cold.  I don't know why I have to imagine that.  That's the case for me!  And I'm a trendsetter re: Shower Heat Levels so if I'm doing it everyone is gonna wanna copy me!  Anyway I'll be back in a little bit.




I Enjoy A Good Title

    Hey!  Took a shower.  Just as I predicted.  I was mostly comfortable with Heat Level Of Water.  So comfortable with it I capitalized it 15 minutes later while writing it just now!  Anyway great just great.  Today is a Halloween Marathon on Television.  That I sort of get!  It's roughly a month away true however it's the same month!  The point is people are too confused and angry about the third Halloween not being about Michael Myers.  LOOK they wanted to do an anthology thing briefly with the franchise.  Makes total sense!  What's your problem!  Get off their back about it just because they changed their minds.  WHO CARES NOT ME.  Hopefully I turn out to be a trendsetter whether people care about Halloween III being about something else.  Someone's gotta Set Trends For Good!  Anyway I'm gonna re-up with coffee after the next sentence.  This sentence, the one right here and now!
     My Mom is downstairs and watching TV!  I know the Looney Tunes were Back In Action in 2003 but now My Mom is back in action in... this year... I wanna say 2021?  Also yep I knew Looney Tunes Back In Action is from 2003 accurately!  Never saw the movie!  Most people probably don't even know such a movie exists!  I barely know!  Still knew instinctively what year its from!  Anyway what else is going on. Gonna take a pretty long break between Entry and Walk III.  We're talkin a solid hour, hour 15 minutes. Wow SOLID?  I would have been happy with a semi-hard hour or hour 15 minutes.  Completely solid though?  Wonderful!  Anyway today coffee is similar to yesterday such that I left over some of 1st coffee an just added however much was left in the cup for 2nd cup on top of that.  That's an easy enough story to convey.  I feel like I could have done better, though.  Off the top of my head I might have used Words And Grammars Wrongly such that it's hard to understand.  Oh well that's life.
     Third paragraph of the Act III!  I think I jus heard my mom clapping.  I hope it was in approval to something and not her doing some other sort of Practical Clapping.  Or maybe it was something else entirely.  STILL though I'm pretty excited about the prospect of her being enthusiastically approving of something.  Probably good news for the rest of us, too!  Anyway great sure.    Presumably something she saw on the television.  Not sure what in real life would cause her to clap.  OKAY GREAT I DON'T CARE.  You should care.  This effects you, too!  If its good for my Mom it's good for All Of Us!  Whatever.  What else is going on.  Maybe she heard my accurate prediction of The Looney Tunes Being Back IN Action being in 2003 and heard it on a delay.  And she was applauding me.  Can't hurt to dream.  Alternatively maybe she didn't hear it on a delay but her clapping was on a delay.  Oh okay that's another way this could be explained.
Penultimate paragraph!  Do they sell long sleeve shirts over the internet.  I can only imagine them selling short sleeve t-shirts.  Wow my imagination isn't great at all.  In some respects that's accurate.  Like this respect.  Anyway.  I saw a Harlem Globetrotters game once.  That's not official basketball league, though!  I've been to Medieval Times a couple of times.  They have some sort of sporting competition but again there's no official league set-up.  Something to do with JOUSTING.  Not sure what jousting is.  I think jousting may be Fencing While On Horses.  Off the top of my head that's what I'm imagining.  Also you're not just both on horses standing next to each other and fencing.  You're making your horses RUN RIGHT AT EACH OTHER and then make a single Fencing Move or two when the other person gets close.  Also how much credit does Winning Jousting go to the horses?  30%?  Gotta imagine they're getting partial credit for the win.
     Anyway I may be describing Something Else.  What else is going on.  Also gotta imagine Medieval Times jousting is staged.  Oh well that's life.  Hmm you eat CHICKEN at Medieval Times.  I'd eat some chicken right now.  I'm not ashamed to admit it!  What else is going on.  Also at Medieval Times are we theoretically supposed to be like royalty or Lords or something watching the action. Or are we regular peasants who somehow finagled their way into this activity.  Gotta imagine in real life normally peasants can't afford to watch stuff like this.  Only for the ruling class!  Either way what else is going on.  We don't have time to start a new subject.  There's Only Several Sentences Left!  Yeah!  That sounds great!  What a wonderful world and whatnot.  Hey I'll be back tomorrow!

-12:20 P.M. 




Friday, October 1, 2021

That Means A Lot

    Hey!  Time to write some more.  Woke up today feeling kind of fluish.  And I still do an hour later!  Combine that with my Mom being on her deathbed for the last 3 days and maybe there's a covid outbreak in my crapshack!  I dunno about that.  Mom and Dad have TRIPLE SHOOTERS.  And I'm ME The Guy Who Nothing Bad Could Ever Happen To.  Also I feel sore where I got the flu shot yesterday so maybe that's related.  I feel SICK from FLU SHOT.  It could happen why not seems plausible to me.  Anyway this paragraph has been A BARREL of laughs so far.  Hmm.  What are barrels good for.   Off the top of my head they're ammunition for Donkey Kong AND can store beverages.  Anyway to close out this paragraph in an uninteresting way when I checked home scale today it was 2 pounds higher than yesterday but 1 pound lower than I was expecting and .5 pounds higher than what I would have expected based on Endocrine Weight Check yesterday.  All in all GREAT FINE I GUESS THAT'S GOOD.
WOW.  I got Super market delivery coming up soon.  Could be as soon as an hour.  Could be as late as NEVER.  The driver dies.  And if a driver dies while in transit to your crapshack they just give up the order for some reason.  That seems wrong.  They should get another driver in there to finish the delivery.  Yes it's sad this guy is dead now but I still need me groceries either way!  YEAH.  Dunno whether I should tell my parents I feel fluish.  Might upset them!  Maybe give it another half a day and then recalibrate.  If I still feel sick later today I'm bringing it up!  YEAH.  FIVE TWO HUH.  You know what that means!  Ideal weight is 2 pounds higher than it would be if I was Five One And A Half.  Hmm I'd eat some chocolate candy right now.  Dunno where that came from.  It just popped into my mind!  A miniature chocolate bar.  Like an Assorted Hersheys Bag.  Any one of 'em!  Except for one of them.  I feel like in the Assorted Hershey Mini Candy Bar bag there's one I'm not a fan of.  Better LTURQ.  MR. GOOD BAR.  How ironic!  They say it's good and I say it's bad.  Also they say it's Mister but I SAY it's Missus.  All the clues are there!
     Anyway.  It is A Bar though.  No questioning that!  So they're 1/3rd accurate which is halfway there I guess.  HEY I get to drink coffee relatively soon.  That's a blast and a half.  Anyway.  Internet confirms that you can feel fluish after flu shot.  So I went ahead and updated my Mother that I Feel Sick Too.  Now we can relate to each other!  Nice Mother-Son relationship.  HEALTHY Mother-Son relationship.  Why did I feel it was necessary to specify it's healthy.  Because I know what's on your mind! You think my relationship with my Mother-Son is unhealthy!  But now you know better.  That settles that.  I CAN'T WAIT TO TELL M YDAD ABOUT MY FLUISHNESS.  He's downstairs now so he hasn't heard the good news.  Have you heard the good news about the good news.  No But I Assume It's Good News.  Nailed it.
Ugh.  Sure I have no soda right now but the good news about the good news is that there's good news which is I will have more soda very soon after Super market delivery is delivered.  Also perhaps the corpse of the driver who died halfway here!  Hmm for me to get the corpse he must have died VERY close to the house.  Like literally right in front of the house.  Otherwise why would the corpse come into my possession?  Doesn't make sense!  The point is I assume Fresh Direct Truck is partially or fully refrigerated/freezered so he's basically halfway there to being preserved until a future time where we can defrost him and he's alive and kicking.  Either that or we can eat him as a snack after dinner.  Ice cream snack.  Frozen foods.  Get with the program.  What program.  If you have to ask you clearly don't know.  ACCURATE.  1000% ACCURATE.  If you have to ask about something you clearly don't know!
     What else is going on and crap.  This is the first day of October, commonly known as the month which culminates in Halloween which is the best day of the year.  Gotta imagine Halloween ranks in the top 5 days of the year if you did a poll of all people.  By which I mean all AMERICANS.  Otherwise known as The BEST People.  Either way I was briefly thinking about LURQ polls of Favorite Days Of The Year but then I realized I don't care and I hope there is no info on the internet and most importantly some things are better left to the imagination.  Sure what else is going on.  I lost track of whether I said anything worthwhile so far this entry.  I feel like off the top of my head I've said 4 things halfway worthwhile and 6 things a quarter worthwhile.  How many Worthwhiles does that add up to. Three and a half worthwhiles.  Right?  Lemme double check that.  Yep sounds right.  WOW that's not bad all in all!
    Wonderful.  I'm as of saying Wonderful over 50% into Act I.  And there's three Acts overall.  Wow per my calculations I'm HALFWAY THERE.  What else is going on.  Endocrine Doctor encouraged me to throw out clothes that I wore when I was overweight.  What's her problem.  Easy to say that when you're not paying for the clothes!  Also I can still wear the same clothes.  They're just not super tight on me!  And/or they're NOW super big on me!  Yeah.  YEAH.  I should have made the most of the moment when she said to throw out my clothes and gone No Time Like The Present! and ripped off all my clothes male-stripper-like and started dancing.  Male-stripper-like dancing!  Also I feel male strippers rip off their clothes more than female strippers.  Female strippers go into the situation wearing very little clothes.  Wait a second.  Strippers.  It's IN THE NAME that they're stripping.  That's the DEFINING QUALITY of what they do.  Shows how much I know!
     Seventh paragraph.  Not sure if I've ever seen strippers in real life.  Well of course I have.  I've walked around places a lot.  I'd see a stripper here and there.  Just not actively stripping!  I would have probably remembered that.  You'd think so wouldn't you.  Anyway.  I think my Mom is doing a little bit better today.  Based on Me Hoping That's The Case.  YEAH.  OH HEY time to flip the Patriotism Calendar page.  THINE ALABASTER CITIES GLEAM.  What the hell does that mean.  I never heard that before.  Also cities aren't Patriotism.  They're not THE REAL America.  Also I don't know what alabaster means!  I think it's some kind of rock.  Is this a reference to The Rock starring Ed Harris Sean Connery and Nicholas Cage?  Either way it's a picture of some sort of city with short sky scrapers.  And there's a big metal statue of a bean or something.  I dunno what that is and frankly I think I'm better off not knowing.
    Hmm any Patriotism days coming up?  Columbus Day on the 11th!  Solid Patriotism Day.  That appears to be it.  YEAH.  For some reason two entirely separate channels were showing Friday The XIII marathons yesterday.  A premium channel and an extended basic cable channel.  And I tried and tried and couldn't come up with anyway that yesterday was Friday The XIII.  Hmm I guess we'll never get to the bottom of this!  Maybe we will one day.  Can't hurt to dream!  Hey right now I already feel more or less not fluish.  Yeah!  HEY Super Market Delivery order just game.  And I accepted it!  And put necessary stuff away!  Also Delivery Driver was alive and/or kicking.  So that's good news for him.  Not so good news for us but oh well.  If he was dead I assume we get custody of the body.  Which we can use one way or another to our benefit.  Hmm.  Way ahead of schedule for today what with early delivery and all.  Wow there's a schedule AND I'm ahead of it?  That's amazing!
     Ninth paragraph.  Great.  Arm is only sore around flu shot when I flex it.  Which is often!  I gotta flex my muscles otherwise who would be impressed by my muscles.  Not sure I have muscles.  I know I'm able to move my arm around which suggests there's some muscles there but there's very little evidence otherwise.  Either way arms are slightly skinnier than they were 37 pounds ago!  THAT'LL LEARN 'EM.  I never even finished my 1 glass of water I had this morning.  I was able to re-up with soda before an entire glass of water.  It's a charmed life we live.  And by we I mean me.  And by life I mean thing.  And by charm I mean what.  Huh.  Only one MLB playoff spot is left in contention.  Well two.  Two American League wild cards.  Yep Two Things is solidly Two and Not One.  Either way I'm rooting for the Seattle Mariners because they're not really a good team and I like an underdog.  Also because Ken Griffey Jr played for them and I'm not one to argue with Ken Griffey Jr.  Also Seattle is as close to GRUNGE as any Major League Baseball Team Is.  Wow GRUNGE?  NOW you're talking my language!
     Last paragraph of the act!  Amazing.  Ugh.  What's the counter to Columbus Day.  Is it just called In, "Diggin' Us!," Peoples' Day?  I think there's a solid 80% chance that's what the day is called ad a counter to calling it Columbus Day.  YEP I WAS RIGHT.  I'm right all the time.  I'm right roughly 80% of the time!  Amazing.  Indigenous people Dig Themselves burial grounds.  ANCIENT burial grounds.  Supernatural, too!  Anyway did they go into digging the burial grounds with the premise that one day they will be ancient and that's really what they're going for?  My guess?  No of course not.  Also my supplemental guess is that there's no such thing as Ancient Indian Burial Grounds.  They froze their dead in Fresh Direct Trucks.  Anyway what else is going on.  Sopranos movie is theoretically available now!  Probably watch that later today.  Maybe save it for NIGHTTIME.  Wow a time that takes place at night?  Now I've got my attention!  Anyway I'll be back soon.



I Can't Hear You

    Make some noise! Hey I'm here to write five paragraphs.  Got some soda going.  Sprite Zero!  So I wouldn't get confused transitioning from water to soda.  Looks very similar.  Sure there's some tiny bubbles accumulating at top of beverage but besides that I'm None The Wiser that it's anything different.  Anyway looking forward to a nice physically cleansing experience after this act.  Morally cleansing, too!  I plan on sucking on some soap.  I haven't cursed lately that I can remember but this is allowance for future curses.  Getting the punishment out of the way first so I can have fun with the future cause of punishment ahead of me.  Yeah.  I feel like I don't punish myself too much.  I take a pretty laissez faire attitude to my own discipline.  And it's gotten my THIS FAR.
How far.  This far.  Ok I hear ya.  My Dad got some low calorie ice cream sandwiches and the box was only SLIGHTLY ripped open!  How lucky can ya get!  Also these low calorie ice cream sandwiches are still 50% more calories than I want from an ice cream sandwich.  FOR NOW.  Once I'm sustaining diet I can go nuts with these ice cream sandwiches.  I'll be none the wiser.  Why do I always wanna be None The Wiser to things.  Keep myself blissfully ignorant.  Oh okay that sounds fair.  I dunno if I'm blissfully ignorant In Life.  Maybe Contentedly Ignorant.  Which isn't bad either!  What else is going on.  Looks like the Yankees will make the playoffs.  That's not good news for me!  I don't like them!  Hardly seems fair that good things would happen for them.  Oh well that's 2021 MLB Season Playoffs for ya.  Maybe I can send them tainted ice cream sandwiches.  What would that accomplish.  Might make them sick.  Oh okay gotcha.
Anyway.  At this point it's gotta be close to two weeks where you don't know my lunches.  OR my dinners.  But you probably didn't care much about my dinners.  Lunches though you were glued to the screen re: paying attention to... my lunches... explicitly.  What else is going on.  Ice cream sandwiches huh.  I like the sound of that.  Then again the low calorie ice cream sandwiches usually skimp with the Sandwich part of the equation.  Inside tastes more or less like ice cream.  But the CRUST is mediocre!  Usually some sort of mediocre cold chocolate I Don't Wanna Say WAFER but I don't know what I Do Wanna Say.  Something Else.  Not really CRUST which is a word I used early erroneously.  The point is you get the idea and that's all we can really ask for.  That's what writing and reading is all about.  Ideas!  Who cares how we get there is the point I've done my job now get off my back about it.
     Anyway.  STILL haven't gotten Big Box of paper towels.  I feel terrible about it HOWEVER I feel great that I still have it coming up.  I can't wait and the point is I could have already had it over and done with and instead I have something t look forward to!  Why were the last three sentences important to say.  If anything they were important NOT to say.  Oh well too late to go back now.  Hmm I wonder what city this is in Patriotism Calendar.  I think it's a REAL place and not just an artist's imagination.  Small sky scrapers.  Some sort of city park with a monument that resembles a big Metal Bean.  There appears to be a GIANT American Flag only half pixilated waving in the background covering the entire sky line behind the buildings.  Nope none of those details ring a bell for me.
That's life I guess!  Also there's skywriting Thine alabaster cities gleam but that tells us NOTHING.  That doesn't help!  You can have sky writing anywhere.  Except for cities where sky writing is banned.  Which has gotta be most cities.  Hmm.  What else is going on.  I saw a really fast moving cloud yesterday.  Was in the car on the way to Endocrine Appointment.  Cloud was just ZOOMING by in the sky.  Yep.  That's the stories I tell here.  I SAW A CLOUD.  I have no regrets.  It was an interesting cloud!  Just a regular big cloud BREEZIN across the horizon.  From left to right!  Wow Left To Right?  NOW I've got my attention.  What else is going on.  Is global warming responsible for Faster Clouds?  My guess?  Sure why not I wouldn't put it past global warming to accelerate the speed of our clouds.  Anyway hey the Act is over.  I'll be back in a little bit. 




You're Doing The Right Thing

    Hey!  Time to write five more paragraphs which will cover me for the rest of the day.  Time to write last paragraph of the day without coffee.  Unless I finish coffee before finishing last four paragraphs.  Which is extremely possible!  Figure I'll save The Sopranos Movie for mid afternoon.  Why leave it for the evening when I can leave it for the mid afternoon?  Why not watch it when I have the time as early as possible.  Because that's not how I operate you idiot.  I never had the game Operation as a child.  Not sure why.  I guess my parents are Anti-operations.  OPERATION?  What's that some sort of word related to the word and concept OPERA?  My guess?  Sure they're related somehow In Latin I wouldn't put it past Latin to have that sort of arrangement going on.  Cool.  Not sure if I've ever seen an opera.  I don't think so.  Neither in person or on VHS.  Hmm good stuff.
Yeah!  Got coffee going just like I said.  Also left over 25% of Last Coffee.  So I just added onto that!  I could have poured it out and Started Anew.  Would have spent no more extra coffee that way because I make too much to begin with.  Decided to keep what I had in the cup anyway!  Go figure!  What else is going on and crap.  It's possible opera is the worst genre not only of music but of anything.  It's not likely.  But in this topsy turvy world just about anything is possible!  Hmm what does Turvy mean.  I barely know what Topsy means, don't even get me started on Turvy.  Also I don't barely know what topsy means.  The, "Top," part threw me for a loop.  I know what, "Top," means as a word but I'm not 100% convinced that's related to the definition of, "Topsy."  And, "Turvy," is just nonsense syllables. 
     Cool!  Last paragraph Three of the day!  Huh.  What else is going on.  Looking forward to a nice huge break between next walk and next walk after that.  Almost a THE SOPRANOS MOVIE sized break???  I dunno that's an hour or two too early than I was anticipating.  I dunno if I'm comfortable making that change.  Gonna go with what my gut tells me at the moment when the time comes to make that decision.  Anyway.  This is The Sopranos but I just figured out why I'm not 100% enthusiastic about it-- NONE OF THE SAME CHARACTERS PLAYED BY THE SAME ACTORS.  I got A KICK out of the cast of the TV show and that's all gone now for this movie.  Hmm maybe I'll get a kick out of the cast of the movie.  We can't take that risk!!!  What risk.  The risk of watching a film and risking not enjoying the characters as much as when they were played by other actors.  Oh THAT risk.
Penultimate paragraph!  I could easily take a bonus walk today.  I will even easilerly NOT do it though.  Yep that all checks out pretty well.  At this point I'm taking three bonus walks every day than the original plan was when I first started this Era Of Walking.  Isn't that enough?  Yes.  Trick question!  It is enough.  How does that make it a trick question.  It was a trick question because it was a trick for you to know the right answer.  Oh okay I see.  YEAH.  What else is going on.  I'm halfway through THE RING II.  I can finish watching that no harm no foul.  I must have seen it before but I don't remember it at all so that calls into question whether I've seen it before.  Maybe it's just not memorable at all.  Nope that can't be it.  I watched half of it last night and I still remember it this morning!  Now you look like a fool for thinking it wasn't memorable at all.  You should apologize to The Ring Franchise. 
Last paragraph of the day!  The New VHS Spooky Tape in The Ring II isn't scary at all!  Let's talk about it!  The first one in the first film was spooky, no doubt about that!  This new one is TERRIBLE.  If you don't believe me then watch it yourself.  Go ahead-- watch it right now!  I'll wait for you.  ... ... ...FINE THIS WAS ALL JUST A CLEVER RUSE TO GET YOU TO WATCH IT SO THE RING GIRL WILL KILL YOU INSTEAD OF ME.  Are you happy now?  Guess I'm doomed.  Can't even convince a single person to watch a The Ring video so the curse transfers from me to them.  What good am I to anyone!  Well I dunno about Anyone but I'm definitely no good to Myself.  Yep that checks out.  Anyway the point is I forget but the entry is just about over so I guess that's the point.  That actually checks out more or less.  I'll be back tomorrow!

-11:22 A.M.






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